Jaune: *Slightly Out Of Breath* Wow... You Were Incredible...

Jaune: *Slightly out of breath* Wow... You were incredible...

Neo: *Kneeling in front of Jaune, smiling seductively at him as she wipes her mouth*

Jaune: W-Well, here's your 50 lien.

Neo: *Takes the money, before handing Jaune a piece of paper*

Jaune: What's this?

Neo: *Pulls up sign* "Forged Transcripts for 50 Lien!"

Jaune: But I was only paying for the blow-

Neo: *Flips sign* "That Was Free!"

Scarlet: I got a latte order for Jaune?

Jaune: That's me. Thank you.

Scarlet: Wait... Jaune, is that you?!

Jaune: Excuse me?

Scarlet: Remember me?

Scarlet: Spanish class?

Jaune: I-I'm sorry...

Scarlet: C'mon. Shade Academy, we sat right next to each other.

Jaune: I'm still drawing a blank here.

Scarlet: We even played Lacrosse together.

Jaune: I know nothing about Lacrosse.

Scarlet: We were great buddies!

Jaune: Look, I'm sorry. I'm running kinda late here.

Scarlet: You were like the most popular kid in school.

Jaune: I... I was?

Scarlet: Yeah, you were class president! Everyone loved you. All the girls had a secret crush on you.

Jaune: T-they did?

Scarlet: Yeah, so did I.

Jaune: ... What?

Scarlet: When I finally came out to everyone, you were the only one that supported me. You gave me the courage to finally open up to my parents and allow them to love me for who I really am.

Scarlet: And you didn't just help me, you've done great things for all of Vacuo. You redirected the lives of troubled kids by showing them that gang violence isn't the way.

Jaune: I... I did?

Scarlet: You were an inspiration to us all.

Jaune: *Scratches head in disbelief*

Scarlet: It's probably hard for you to remember. Doctors weren't sure if you'd ever get your memory back from that incident.

Jaune: Wait... What incident?

Scarlet: When you saved those orphans from a burning church, a chunk of debris fell on your head. You were in a coma for 9 months.

Jaune: I-I was?

Scarlet: It was the bravest thing I ever saw.

Jaune: O-oh, well... Thank you.

Scarlet: *Places hand upon Jaune cheek* I understand you can't remember right now... But I'll never forget the last words you said to me before you ran into that building.

Jaune: What did I say?

Scarlet: You said "Puedo perder mi vida, pero la esperanza…"

(Translation: I may lose my life, but hope...)

Scarlet + Jaune: "La esperanza es lo último que perderé."

(Translation: Hope is the last thing I'll lose)

Jaune: Y'know... I-I think I'm starting to remember now!

Scarlet: Well, it's good to have you back, Jaune.

Jaune: Well, it's good to be back.

Scarlet: *Hands him his latte, but stops as he see's the name written on it* Wait... It's Jaune with an AU?

Jaune: Yeah?

Scarlet: Oh, I think I mistaken you for someone else. My bad. Here's your latte, have a nice day. *Gives him his drink before immediately going back to work*

Jaune: B-but wait-

Scarlet: I got an order for Flynt?

Scarlet: Flynt? I-Is that you?!

Flynt: Do I know you?

Scarlet: You saved my wife from a grizzly bear attack!

Jaune: I'm the Hunts-Man, you lunatic. Anyway, you guys got any 'shrooms?

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Bystander: Are you... An angel!?

Jaune: Yeah, sure, whatever... You got any ketamine?

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Jaune: I know you're here, Roman, you big fucking nerd. Where's my goddamn money?

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Grunt #1: Be careful, man. I hear Hunts-Man attacks with all sorts of random bullshit.

Grunt #2: Please. I got him dead to rights. Now to-

Jaune: *Throws something* Random bullshit GO!!!

Grunt #1: Damn you Hunts-Man!

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Jaune: I am the god of light. Hand over your wallet and your ketamine or Remnant is doomed.

Marrow: Fuck off, Hunts-Man. I'm not falling for that one again.

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Jaune: ... Why do I hear Eminem all of a sudden?

Hound: *Looming over him*

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Clover: Someone's hacking the system, but who? Hunts-Man!

Jaune: Where's my goddamn money!?

Harriet: No-one here owes you money, you drunk, crazy asshole. Roman isn't even on the Ace-Ops, so stop calling here.

Jaune: Wait... Roman isn't an Ace-Op?

Jaune: That lying fuck.

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Jaune: You know who I really want to fight? Junior.

Elm: Wait, the asparagus from VeggieTales? Or the crime lord?

Jaune: ... Yes.

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Jaune: Honestly? At this point, I don't even remember why Roman owes me money. But a guy's got to live by a code, you know?

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Vine: It's over, Hunts-Man! I have the high ground!

Jaune: Impossible. Do you even know how many drugs I'm on right now?

Vine: That's not what I-

Jaune: Less talk, more VENGEANCE!!

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Nora: Dammit, Jauney, let someone else have a turn for once!

Jaune: No! Ren is my homie... Only I get to give him a goodnight kiss!

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Jaune: Using my Marine Corps training, I can turn ANYTHING into a weapon! Even this rifle!

Watts: Uh, isn't a rifle already a weapon?

Jaune: *Snaps rifle in half and smacks him across the face* Semper Fi, bitch!

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Jaune: God of Darkness, you fucking nerd! Where's my... Uhhh what are you doing?

G.o.D: Don't let her get me. I didn't mean to look at those lewd hieroglyphics! Forget if gods can bleed. Can a god simp?!

Jaune: What the fuck are you talki-

G.o.D: *Grabs him* I was horny, Jaune Arc. And now, Salem is going to quantum bonk me!

Jaune: Who is going to what now??

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Roman: *Half dead inside of grimm* What? It's impossible. It can't be... A way out! And... the Hunts-Man!?

Jaune: That's right, bitch! Now where's my goddamn money? Don't make me come down there and waterboard you, shitheel.

Hm... What about a double lancaster? Jaune x (female)Ruby and (male)Ruby

(wanted to try an outlandish one and came up with this)

Are these twins Rubes? Is one Ruby from a parallel world?

Might as well do the inverse, right?

A whole mess of'em

Why does Ochaco like Bakugo?

Like actually. Why does she treat Bakugo friendly? Why does she say she thinks he’s cool? Why does she use the insult he gave her best friend, the name she was expressly told was an insult, as a nickname for said friend? Why does she have nothing negative to say to the guy who demeans, insults, and assaults her best friend on a constant basis?

Why do fans see this and immediately want her to cuck Izuku for Bakugo while he watches?

Questions like this make me slowly regret checking out the show and giving it a chance when I did more and more with each day. As well as a large assortment of other things that would take me hours to even get through half.

Employee: *Holds up a tray of dino nuggets* Free sample?

Jaune: *Takes one* Mmm, delicious! I will seriously consider purchasing these. *Leaves*

Employee: 😊

Jaune: *Walks up, now wearing an unzipped white jacket with a faunus tail* Ooo, what do we got here? Don't mind if I do. *Takes one before leaving*

Employee: 🤨

Jaune: *Now has a tattoo on his arm with some stubble on his face* Oh? Dino nuggies? I'll need to buy a ton of these for my girls.

Employee: Sir, you don't need to keep going to the back of the line. You can have as much as you want, they're free.

Taiyang: What are you talking about?

Sun: Hey, can I have another dino nuggie?

Jaune: Yeah, me too?