A Sentence That Makes Me Hysterical: "You're Too Young For Me..."

A sentence that makes me hysterical: "You're too young for me..."

Well, I tried to take step back but how when he sends me a picture of three kittens and asks which one I think is the cutest, because he might adopt one (???????)

Sir, won't you adopt me too, I'm the cutest kitty in the world?!!!!😩

Just so that I don't always write you girls nice and cute things.

I didn't post anything yesterday because I was sulking.🙄 We had a bit of a fight (or something) Basically, he was pretty grumpy all day, so it looked like he wasn't in a good mood and to be honest, I must have made a mistake bc I wasn't respectful enough in his class. (??? idk)

Actually, I always listen and take notes in his class, but yesterday my bestie and I were so immersed in our nonsense that we often giggled softly and sometimes even wrote to each other under the bench. (now I won't go into detail about what we talked about bc it's irrelevant) R never spoke to us or warned us, I didn't think at all that we would disturb us because we were really very quiet and anyway I clearly paid attention to him and took some notes. and everyting seems good until the class ended and he called me by my full name. (Jesus *goosebumb*) I might add that he just gave my friend a nasty look, but didn't tell her to come over there, only just me.… ._.

"Next time, are you going to listen to me or have fun in my class?" I definitely remember his words, he asked so coolly that I was really embarrassed, but then I immediately responded that I'm sorry, my friend and I just wandered off a bit. Then his face still didn't soften, he stood up very sternly and leaned very close to me and said: "I really don't like being ignored in my class, especially if it's one of my best students. It's my class and your attention is mine, do you understand?"

After that, he didn't even allow me to answer because he just walked past me but pushed my shoulder a little with his arm. ( ???HAH???) What can I say, I was quite confused as to why he only screwed me when this happened to me for the first time!!!, but when other people do it several times, then they don't get scolded like that...

I don't think this is fair. I really always try to live up to him and yes, I didn't listen 120%, but I don't think he should have been so cold and condescending. Anyway, that was yesterday and then I didn't even talk to him all day and we didn't send any messages to each other.

Today he was like always, he seemed normal, but I'm an offended little girl, you know, so when he greeted me in the corridor, I just greeted back neutrally and he just smiled at me. (okay???)

I dont understand my man ummm but it was good to write this now.

"oh look girl he's older than us..."

Thank you honey!!!

I honestly don't know exactly what dad meant by that sentence, I can only guess since then, because I haven't spoken to him either. Maybe I should talk to him first and then draw a conclusion about how R relates to me. Because it's not even certain that he knows and only father guessed, because he knows my reactions. (i dont know.) And R's behavior is also often misunderstood even without *Delulu*. Sometimes I feel like he likes me, but recently there have been days (like this week) that he has kept his distance. But there also because I started to distance myself from him for the first time after the gathering. So maybe he did it because of me, because he saw that I needed some space now. (I don't know that either) You can already see that our story is a bit stormy because you read my posts (which I can't thank you enough <3) and now I'm a little stuck. You maybe right and R is like James and remains unrequited love. But at the same time, I still have an idiotic hope that maybe… maybe he has some feelings for me.

I have stepped back a bit since my father informed me that I should look around my own age group. I felt I had to do this because I was scared. Since then I haven't even spoken to R, I haven't written him back and when we met at school I didn't pay him much attention, I just said "hi" and lived my normal university life. However, my repressed emotions began to break out and the fact that I saw him, but he wasn't smiling at me but at the other girl, or that he wasn't paying attention to me bothered me. I felt a kind of distance from him since the gathering, so I think that's why he didn't force us to talk. But because I kept suppressing my feelings, I became very sensitive and irritable, and my friends didn't understand that either. Of course they don't understand, how could they? I could never admit to them that I like R, (although I'm starting to feel that everyone knows.)

Today I felt that I couldn't hold back anymore when R walked past me in the corridor but suddenly stopped me and asked if I was okay. It's the first time since then that he spoke to me and I wanted to boldly say yes, but when I opened my mouth not a sound came out. I felt a lump in my throat and tried to fight back my tears, but I couldn't really hold them back anymore. Then R came to me quite quickly and I could totally see that he was worried. Then when he asked what was wrong, it didn't matter to me... I simply couldn't hold myself back and I fell specifically for him and ran into his embrace. Yes, I hugged him after several days of not speaking. He didn't say anything, as if he knew that I just needed a hug right now and let me cling to his shirt and crumple it well. Then he hugged me so tightly that I even cried a little... He had no idea that He was the reason I was crying. I ran into the arms of the one for comfort for whom I cried. I quickly stopped and apologized to him, and before he let go, he said quietly: "You know, if something bothers you, you can tell me"

No. I can't say that you are the one who presses my soul. That you are the one who has made me feel like a living dead for days. That you are the only one in whose arms I can find comfort and simply collapse into you I still want to feel.

What a bitter story.

光棍 ☺️