EATS THIS LIKE IM A STARVING VICTORIAN CHILD AND THIS IS A MEAL WORTHY OF THE QUEEN

EATS THIS LIKE IM A STARVING VICTORIAN CHILD AND THIS IS A MEAL WORTHY OF THE QUEEN

a lil headcanon about the end of NPMD (spoilers ahead, obvs)

i was thinking about NPMD this morning (as you do) and i realized something.

by the end of NPMD, when max's soul is taken by the lords? who do you think is going to torture him the most?

tinky.

let me explain.

who was tinky watching like a hawk during "the summoning"? pete. another spankoffski. another prize for his toybox. he could hardly keep his hands off him. you could see that he wanted to lunge at pete and grab him right away. he probably even got a bit mad when wiggly stroked the boy's face.

but it was okay. because this would be perfect! he'd have a Petey all of his own! and then he could torture the brothers together and they can watch each other suffer which will make them BOTH suffer more-

but then. BUT THEN.

max stopped steph from shooting pete. and either max moves at super ghostly speed or some magic imbued in his undead form from the waylon place gave him time-slowing powers. but either way, he stopped that bullet.

pete was going to die. and he wasn't going to heaven or hell. he was going to be taken to the Black, where he would definitely be tinky's new favorite toy.

so how dare this shitty zombie jock use this ripoff version of his time-controlling powers. and ESPECIALLY how dare he use them to keep pete from getting shot and his soul falling straight into tinky's terrifying grasp?

then he has to watch grace and max have sex, which is absolutely fucking disgusting. he was already seething, but now he knows that he's not going to get a good toy out of this deal. he's getting this stupid shitty kid that no one liked.

and he's not a spankoffski.

so when the lords do take his soul, when max is pulled into the Black, of course wiggly is gleeful about this. all of them are. oh, how they'll enjoy torturing him for all eternity, exposing him to unimaginable horrors and unspeakable evils. what a fun new toy!

but they decide that their furious bastard of a brother should get first dibs. after all, they knew tinky was really looking forward to having a Petey. and it's the only thing they can think of to calm him down, because "rage" doesn't even begin to describe how tinky's feeling right now.

besides, now that they have grace as their fun little soulsnatcher, they'll have plenty of other toys to play with.

so they gladly hand max over to tinky.

max thought he knew what fear was. skele'ns, ghosts, people forgetting about him, his (probably abusive) father.

no.

this is going to be way worse.

he sees tinky's horrific, goat-like grin, feels his crackling, angry energy radiating in the Black and surrounding him.

tinky's voice is low, a deep growl that shakes max's bones. he wears a smile that is anything but happy.

"you're going in the box now, maxie-poo. i hope you have..."

"... a great time." 💛

how i feel entering my causing problems on purpose arc wanted to join the 'drawing grace insane and ready to exterminate the horny guy population' party so i did (was this also a poorly disguised excuse to draw the lib again? yes what of it)

no but Starkid's version of eldritch gods is so funny bc yes they're divided into black and white categories based on whether or not they help humans but there's only one of the helpful ones and the others are a pretentious theatre kid, a toddler staring at you on the bus home from work, a kid who forces his sims to set themselves on fire, reloads the save file, then does it again, Hungy, and a corporation that's trying to keep up its family friendly image. also the only one that doesn't actively harm humans is an indie folk artist

This is. The coolest thing I've ever seen. Oh my god.

Darkness will spare my soul

Here's all my Nerdy Prude Must Die paintings in one set! These teens live rent free in my head for all eternity. I think i have the show memorized at this point for how much I watched it while doing these.

Yes I redid Richie's painting Don't look at me . (and shout out to @to-our-own-fairytale for the banger quote suggestion)

Edit: By popular demand, I have added these as prints to my store! Find them here!

had a Richie and Max coded interaction this morning

featuring @strangeandinteresting