[] There's No Point On Denying How You Still Struggled To Let Your Guard Down Even When The Both Of You

[♡] there's no point on denying how you still struggled to let your guard down even when the both of you were alone. you were 2-months into the relationship yet it still felt like every day you spent with him was one of your first ones. your hand still didn't feel confident enough to take his, and feeling his hand on your waist at night after one of your dinner dates still made you giggle like a school girl and blush like a tomato.

and tonight, first night spent between the both of you, you are taking a few more minutes looking at the mirror making sure the pajamas you'd carefully chosen weren't too revealing. you had turned around in the mirror at least a thousand times to make sure you didn't have your whole butt out (just a sneaky peek), arranged your hair in a way that the apple of your cheeks didn't look to big or your nose too long, and hid the little armpit fat you'd grown to hate so much. you had never tried that much for someone; not for anyone actually. but this time around you were so in love... so in love. you were nervous, nervous because you still didn't know how deep his love for you was, and if it was unconditional. but at the end of the day you knew he would only see perfection in what you see as imperfections. it's crazy enough to feel so elated because of love, and you mentally slapped yourself for overthinking so much to make yourself crazier.

two knocks on your door make you know that he's waiting for you. "babe, you okay?" he asks, and you shiver. he's that good. you're that in love. your body always reacts before you can even process anything. "coming out in a min!"

and it turns out that even if you come out with your previously worn clothes in your arms to hide your body from him, he still looks at you with a smile that makes you think "fuck it" and leave your clothes on the floor forgotten just to feel his arms around you in his really expensive and comfortable bed.

you'd think tomorrow about the consequences of not putting enough deodorant since namjoon takes his last minutes awake to inform you his a.c is broken and that's why he cannot cuddle you throughout the entire night.

it was all good. for now.

[♡] he will never forget the way his heart stopped beating when he saw you coming out of work crying your heart out, and he lets you cry, even though his arms itched to hug you and he felt desperate to feel you even closer, he knew you needed your time to recompose and you never liked to be hugged unless you asked for.

and when he takes you to your favourite restaurant for date night, after a few silent minutes interrupted by your occasional sniffling, to hear your shy chuckles after a dumb joke that spilled from his lips, felt relieving, to say the least. he cleans the last set of tears still showing on the apple of your cheeks and with both hands gently pushes your hair behind your shoulders to let your cheeks breathe a little, a tiny shiver overtaking your body for a moment as a response.

"i love you so much, please don't ever cry again. you break my heart into a million pieces when you do" you nod to his words with another sniff and smile to him once he starts bringing bits and pieces of his food to the plate in front of you.

and seokjin makes sure that you leave the restaurant with your stomach full of food and feeling like things could get better, his arm around your shoulders letting you know that you're safe, at least when you're with him.

[♡] "Oh, thank god you're here" he says after you let yourself in. You'd never been in his studio before, but he had texted you to come by urgently, followed by a passcode that would let you get in. It was unkown territory and a little bit intimidating really, but at the same time, you were already loving the fact that there is a whole room full of him, his cologne in the air making you feel warm inside.

"Are you okay? I was so worried" by the looks of it, he had exaggerated a bit, that's what you were seeing. He had all of his limbs intact, so what was happening?

"Yeah, I just want to leave." he gets up in a nonchalant way, like he hadn't scared the fuck out of you with his texts, and you weren't panting from having to almost run from the subway that's 4 blocks from here. And you weren't a runner, either. He was going to pay for this.

Seeing him put on his jacket gives you a view of not only him but the computer standing right beside him, in the center of a combination of multiple speakers that you don't really know about. "Are you not going to finish that?" you look at the computer that had multiple tabs open, his work in progress just being left like that.

"I want to eat" he simply says. He looks at himself in the tiny mirror beside him and puts his beanie on, ready to leave. Is he kidding?

Before he could pass beside you, you lay your hand right on his chest, stopping him from moving forward. "Aren't you forgetting something?" you look at him with a questioning look. He instantly pouts his lips, and leaves a tiny peck on yours.

Yeah, that'll do for now.

[♡] "how can i help you?" his deep voice right by your ear makes the hair behind your neck stand tall and proud, and a shiver runs down your body when he runs his long fingers through your skin, finally positioning themselves at your shoulders, lightly massaging them.

you can feel his chin really close to you and you notice the way he whispers the words in front of him while reading, your biochemistry book intimidating him inmediately. you laugh when you notice he gets up in an instant. "i'm sorry baby, but that's hard.." he sounds kind of sad and you give him a tiny smile, looking up to find him giving you one of those pouts you love so much. "i know.." you mutter, and you slightly caress the hands on your shoulder. "thank you though" he gives you a quick hug with all of his will and you laugh at the sudden jolt of movements, your face full of his dark curls. "tae!" you chuckle once again when he gives you the fattest smooch on your cheek, a tiny peck on your lips joining afterwards.

"i'm lending you all of my strength to get through it, i love you so much"

[♡] You looked one more time at your phone just to see if you had missed amy other important message but found absolutely nothing. jungkook had called you last minute and told you to get up from bed and wait for him at your doorstep because he was on his way. that was almost an hour ago. the slightly cold breeze was starting to annoy you since you weren't properly dressed for the night and you were pretty sure your doorman was starting to think you were crazy because you hadn't moved one inch ever since you got down from your apartment.

just as you started to doze off the loud and annoying noise of a motorbike's engine woke you up. next thing you know, jungkook is setting one feet on the ground and taking a helmet of his head, the angle providing you a great view of his neck veins and his soft silky black hair.

"seriously?" you asked. completely unamused. he spent the last few months talking about getting a bike, but you were almost sure he wasn't going to..

"hey baby!" he exclaims happily in a cheery tone. "like my new toy?" just as he finished his question he changed his teasing smile to one of his many dorky expressions. how could you not love him?

"i am not getting on that, i'm telling you right now."

[♡] it is one thing to care about the people around you but it is another to be with your boyfriend at all times. your sweet and giving nature helped you define and demonstrate the amount of love you felt for him. and that's why today, even if you have your bag full of notes and pending stuff to do, you're still taking the 2-hour bus trip to visit your boyfriend, who'd informed you this morning how he'd fallen sick, and you most certainly know that his cold and fever are a mild consequence of how seasons are changing and he's not taking the proper care to face the weather.

and you don't mind how your hands burn and how they'd gotten red from how heavy the bags with takeout were and how little strength you had. what's wrong with running around to find the perfect soup and the best side dishes to go with just so that he can feel better? you knew it would cheer him up right away, even though you regret not having enough time to actually cook him, but this time around you truly couldn't find any time to do so. he'd get extra kisses instead.

arriving now at his apartment, the first thing you notice is him laying down with what you suppose is a wet cloth covering his eyes and the whole apartment drowned in darkness. you coo at hearing his whines, knowing well he just turned on them on like a switch after hearing you come in.

there was a time taehyung swore he could even fist fight a shark for you; tonight he's not even able to fight a headache and a bright white light.

"taehyung-ah" you murmur, and he hums, his arm instantly rising, searching for you.

and he doesn't respond until you're beside him, "baby, i'm so glad you're here" he pouts and barely gets up with the help of your arms, the weakness on his body making him instantly fall again backwards. it makes you feel guilty for not rushing here sooner, and you let him know, but he will not accept an apology, even less coming from you. in his eyes, you simply can't do anything wrong, that's why even feeling like shit, he takes the time to caress the back of your hand and bring you closer.

it's like magic. the way your body fits just right besides his, and his arms find safety on your waist. today he makes it a mission to lay his head on your chest, whimpers leaving his lips even though he starts to feel better now that you're here. he purs when your hands come up to his hair and ruffle it with extra care, and you're not surprised to find his forehead burning up.

and you're reminded of how needy he is when he rubs the side of his face on your boobs in a cheeky way. "you're not going to find the cure to your cold in there, babe" your giggles are interrupted once he hisses when his head reminds him of his predicament.

"can't blame a man for trying"