19 he/him
22 posts
Val3ntinus - Tumblr Blog
for her birthday, palestinian miku wants you to help zinh!
zinh is a 20 year old dental student from gaza who is collecting donations to escape gaza together with her family
please share & donate if you can!
lan wangji is the funniest bitch ever and we don't talk about it enough
You're so right for that.
😈
🌈New Merch Release🌈
Parflette is releasing 12 bed sheets of the boys in their pj’s! Each sheet is ¥9,900 ($63 USD) & will be shipped around August of this year! International buyers are able to get these sheets using Buyee!
Link to Store
If there’s any questions on how to use Buyee feel free to leave a comment and I’ll help you!
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Here’s the line up of the sheets you can get!
Aight so someone posted this in the comments one of my twitter posts and I just Gotta say if this was Lucifer’s demon form and he was coming at me... I’m pretty sure all my organs would vacate my body outta fear.
Also commissions slots open again tomorrow same dealio so eyes peeled for the post~
i don't know if tumblr has seen this yet but this is honest to god my favorite video
So we’ve all seen the posts on MC telling the brothers absurd lies about humans and just letting them believe it right?
Hear me out here: making the brothers watch the entirety of “Cunk on Earth” and just letting them believe that it is a 100% factual show.
—
"When are you evolving skin made of bricks?" Belphie mumbles into your skin, pulling you closer. “What?” you ask, still sleepy from your nap. “You know, what the lady said. About the brick skin,” you stir slightly, remembering that tonights episode had mentioned it. “Oh yeah,” you say. “I think it’s gonna be another thirty years or so,” you say, running your fingers through his hair. “Why?”
Belphegor opens his eyes for approximately three seconds and gives you a bleary-eyed look. “I was jus’ thinkin’” he mumbles and snuggles deeper into the cushions. “It’s gonna be really inconvenient to cuddle when you’re made of bricks,”
—
"Isn’t it crazy that nineteen out of twenty people are criminals?” Satan mumbles to Asmodeus, while sorting through his books, looking for a particular one. Asmodeus shrugs while filing his nails. “I don’t know, seems pretty accurate to me.”
—
"What are these?" Solomon asks looking at the bag of eggs Mammon has placed in front of him. He looks up at the demon with furrowed brows. "Eggs," Mammon says as a matter of fact and pushes the basket closer to the baffled wizard. "May I ask why?" Solomon says and pushes the basket back to Mammon again.
“They're human money? It’s to pay for my debt," Mammon states. “You’ve really forgotten how things work in the human world, old man.” Mammon laughs, walking away and leaving a very confused Solomon with a basket full of eggs.
—
"Thank Diavolo, Charles Darwin invented evolution. I'd hate it if you were a fossil." Leviathan says one night when you’re playing video games in his room. You let out a surprised giggle, which causes your fingers to slip on the controller. Leviathan stares at the big red “game over” on the screen as you apologize profusely, while simultaneously choking on your own laughter.
“Actually never mind, I want Darwin to reverse evolution again.”
—
"Santa came to visit every Christmas from when I was 3 years old till I was like 14," you say and look up when you feel a sudden change in the air. Lucifer is looking at you worriedly and places a hand on your thigh. "Wow, wanna talk about it?" he asks and your brows furrow. "It's not that serious, is it really?" you say and Lucifer shakes his head, making a tsk sound. "Typical humans, always downplaying their emotions," he says and pulls you towards him, causing you to tumble into his lap. He pats your head. "Being visited by a home intruder must have been really difficult for you," he says and you blink, remembering Philomena Cunk referring to Santa as "the world's most popular home intruder".
"Oh yeah, I guess it was kind of hard," you lie, internally dying as Lucifer coos at you.
—
"What are they doing?" Solomon asks, sitting down beside you. You look up from your homework to the two demons saying nonsense at each other.
"Katze!"
"Genau!"
"I don't know, you can ask them," you say and return to your homework, leaving the wizard to deal with the two idiots. "Hey, what's going on?" Solomon calls out and Beelzebub and Belphegor's heads snap towards you. Beelzebub's lips curl into a smile and he shrugs nonchalantly. Belphegor rolls his eyes.
"We're speaking the code language that MC taught us," Belphegor drawls and Solomon looks at you. You grin at him. "Yeah, it's called German,"
Solmare has been feeding us very well lately, for which I'm very grateful. Not only that, but I've also been extremely lucky with Nightmare cards recently! However...
Why is Barbatos so. damn. stubborn. I swear, despite my rituals that desperately call for him each time I do a pull, he never shows up. Not only in the Skateboard event--It's hard for me to get any cards of him overall.
I've literally already gotten 2 Luci's and 2 Belphie's in the Skateboard Nightmare event... I mean, don't get me wrong--I absolutely adore those boys as well, but lately, I'm in a huge Barbatos brain rot 😔 And his stubbornness pains me greatly, especially after I spent a huge chunk of my OM savings (dv and dp)...
I made this too and I’m crying
Mammon, sneaking into the Palace Museum to steal sth :
Barbatos, hoola-hooping in the middle of the room :
Mammon:
Barbatos :
Mammon:
Barbatos: no one will ever believe you.
Mammon : bastard.
Welcome Home, Barbatos.
But seriously, I'M DESPERATE. I'm wasting everything I have just to get him 😭 and I still didn't...
Baby, please come home, I'm begging🙏
“Welcome Home, Barbatos. ”
We all say in unison
I’m going to bed with even my meter being impressed with the amount of boops given to me
Yes it is 6 am shut up
Just a shoutout to @val3ntinus and @lyle-my-beloved for being the main ones to help me get to OMG status lmao 🤣
You’re both CRAZY FAST BOOPERS WTF 😵💫
Val I didn’t even know you before this and you carried me to 1000 boops received. What a champ. 😭 And you even like Obey Me too we’re now mooties for a reason other than booping! 😂
Lyle!!! You!!! 🫵!!! We need to talk more and scream about Cater. He’s my fav in Heartslabyul for a reason. An absolute icon. Just like you! 😘
OKAY I NEED TO GO TO BED AND SUFFER THE CONSEQUENCES OF MY BAD LIFE CHOICES GOODBYE FOREVER (not really)
BOOP!
When I tell you I got so pranked by the Obey Me! Battle Royale ad... 😭
i am. i am desperate to be booped. please
Due to everyone calling for Barbatos for help so often, he's learned to respond to every little noise he hears that may be directed to him. The obvious ones being someone calling his name or saying hey, etc. But some others would be more obscure, like when someone is talking to someone else, and they say something along the line of "get him to do it."" And Barbatos immediately knows that he is "him."
Okay, but imagine doing the pspspspsps to Barbatos as you would a cat. He's repond. He would. I would do this every day and night. All the time. That's it, that's the take
LOL I can just IMAGINE it.
Barbatos would absolutely respond, but it'd also be like, "MC, must you pspsps at me? Can you not use your words?"
Like he's gently complaining about it, but he's still gonna come right over to your side as soon as you do it.
I think of him as being very cat like anyway, so it'd be hard to resist the temptation to do that lol.
I also agree that he's hyper aware of people needing him and speaking about him. He's just on top of it, always ready to step in should his assistance be required!
Ah now I'm having visions of him sitting down next to MC, who proceeds to pet his head like a little cat because they can't help it. And that stoic demon purrs. I'd lose my whole mind. He'd probably blush profusely, but he also wouldn't stop.
I like to think of Barbatos as a tease, but it's equally fun to tease him lol.
May i ask for a beel compilation of him being so fucking funny. Istg he doesn't speak ever but then he just deadpans the funniest shit out of nowhere
as a fellow silent king i cannot help but stan. love me a guy who gives 🗿 energy, then opens his mouth and drops the wildest shit ever
