Ive Been Listening To The Rain, Envious Of How It Always Has The Courage To Fall, And Ive Sewn Breaths

I’ve been listening to the rain, envious of how it always has the courage to fall, and I’ve sewn breaths into my heart where I let you in, but loneliness is a loyal lover who always stays the night. sometimes I feel like I haven’t been home in years. Some days I exist only in my dreams. Will you love me even when I’m drowning? Will you swim to the depths and love me there? How do I stop living in my heartbreak? I like watching sunsets because the sun deserves a goodbye too. I’m tired and the earth doesn’t fit inside me anymore, but I always thought it would be okay as long as you don’t like crowded places.

I hope you find steady hands, gentle eyes, & the softest love your heart can hold.

Intimacy is quiet

Is the sound of your heartbeat fluttering against the soft skin of my palm

And our breathes syncing into delicate harmonies as we lay next to each other

Is the exhale of grief when our fingers intertwine

Is the stillness of the night when we are content to hold each others bodies

And make no promises

That will shatter the silence when they break

I keep writing of love

But what an imposter I am

For what do I know of love?

Of being held?

Of being desired?

But I suppose I write

Of love

And it's unbecoming

Of ache

Of writhing in your own skin with longing

I suppose I write

Of love

And the ugly thing it becomes when night falls and you have nothing to hold but your own inadequate heart

And I think

I know a great deal

Of this

Or atleast

Enough

To write a poem

Or two

And is it not the brightest stars

That burn out the quickest

That birth the most beautiful destructions

- Supernova unbecoming// All the stars are already ghosts// And in this way was Starry Night not an obituary

I haven't been sleeping well these days. There is catastrophe blossoming beneath my skin. I live in fear of the person I am always just one mistake away from becoming.

“you changed” yes, I realized my worth & fell in love with the stars.

s.s. (stephenstilwell)