The Moment I Knew

—the moment i knew

pairing: quill kipps x lockwood!reader

summary: quill and you were a lot closer once, before everything suddenly changed and he was not there when you needed him most

warnings: canon typical violence, angst (with a happy ending)

note: this had been in my drafts for way too long, the ending is kinda meh and i kinda hate all of this so..

"look out, y/n!" kat called and you jumped to the side at the last second, before the ghost could touch you

"thank you" you called towards the girl and continued to try and fight the ghost off. that seemed to work for a while, until it didn't.

"quill!" you called out. the boy had his back facing you, searching through a stake of books at the table. "quill" you repeated "i need you, please" the wail screeched and you jumped aside once again. there was only so much you could do, until it would be able to come close enough to touch you

you continued to fight as much as you could, stepping back when the ghost charged at you once again. you stumbled over a piece of furniture and quickly made contact with the floor, losing your rapier in the progress.

"shit" you exclaimed and watched in horror as the ghost came closer and closer to you "quill" you called for the boy once again, but he was still much more concentrated on whatever he was doing "quill"

the ghost outstretched his arm and— darkness

you shrieked up in bed, forehead drenched in sweat, once again being awaken by the nightmare there replayed itself in your worst nights.

you got out of bed, changing into comfortable clothes. the walk down to the kitchen was quiet, only filled with the chatting of your friends.

"morning" you smiled, entering the kitchen and sitting down next to your cousin, anthony lockwood himself.

"morning" your friends chimed

lockwood noticed the stoic look on your face, just how he noticed about everything that you did. he was always concerned of your well-being, especially after your almost death a year ago, while still working for fittes.

the moment he had heard what happened, he showed up at your doorstep and talked you into joining his newly founded agency. at least he could have a look over you.

he hated kipps even more, after what he did to you.. or more precisely.. didn't do.

"it's the nightmare again, isn't it?" he muttered and you nodded softly

after you joined the agency you had resigned to only do researches, helping george and mostly staying away from cases, your trauma being too much for you to handle that again.

lockwood was glad that you decided to stay away from fighting ghosts, but he was concerned either way. you had always loved working in the field and never were scared before facing a ghost. that all had changed and in some moments, anthony thought he didn't recognise you anymore.

"we'll talk about it later, yeah?" you asked to stray away his eyes from your form. lucy and george watched curiously as you leaned back in your chair and slowly started biting down your sandwich.

"you look tired" noticed george and you nodded

"the traffic was too loud, I will try to catch some sleep later" none of your friends said anything about the obvious lie. they knew it was your way of telling them to just drop the matter. they all shared a glance, before returning to the topic they had been discussing before. a new case that had just revealed itself this morning.

"i think we should take a stop at the library" george suggested

you smiled at that. "oh yeah, we haven't gone there together in forever!"

the rest of the group nodded, happily accepting the shift in your mood and continued eating. after breakfast you cleared the table and took your stuff, heading to the library.

you stood in the middle of two rows of shelfs, a few feet away from the table the group had sat down at. you could hear lockwood's faint voice. he sounded... angry?

you collected all the books you needed in your arms and went back to the table. the last thing you caught was what lockwood had to say, before you arrived. "y/n will be back any minute, i want to see you gone by then"

you looked up and caught kipps' eyes across the table. he looked at you, interest in his features. you hadn't seen much of each other in the past year, always keeping away from places you knew the other person could be.

"quill" you greeted neutrally

"y/n" he nodded

"what did I tell you?" you could feel lockwood's anger bubbling.

"i'm sorry" quill shook his head "i wasn't aware that you had bought the library"

lockwood rolled his eyes. "we haven't. but here are a few tables where we wouldn't have to see your faces"

quill ignored him completely. he stepped next to where you still stood and took a glance at the books you held in hand. his face was so close, that you could feel his breath fan over your neck. if you had moved your head, you probably would've kissed.

you knew that quill didn't do it to anger you. after all he was mostly searching for your forgiveness. the letters he send you never stopping. lockwood didn't know about that, and you would never tell him, because in his eyes quill didn't deserve one second of your attention, while you were only mere seconds away from breaking and forgiving him.

quill only did this to anger lockwood, but you knew he was concerned about you. you just get yourself back in a position where you were dependent on that concern.

"leave them alone" lockwood bellowed and quill grinned, resting his hand against your waist and giving it a gentle squeeze. you looked at him and you could see the sincerity in his eyes.

in your head, you had forgiven him a long time ago. you were still distanced and hurt, but you knew that he hadn't done it to hurt or potentially kill you on purpose.

it were still the same feelings that made it hard for you to stir away from the boy. in his letters, he had talked about those same feelings he harboured, not that lockwood would let you out of the house without lucy, george or himself, so there wasn't a chance to pursue anything.

and you weren't even sure if you still wanted it.

he stepped away from your body, and something in you was sad at the warmth that left with him. but that was the weak side of you, the side that would read his letters and cry itself to sleep or that would sometimes even answer them. you had to get over him and you had to do it fast.

the next morning you all stood in front of the house that you had spent the whole day before researching. lockwood had just parted you in two teams, this was the first case you would join again, after the incident.

but before you could walk in, a deprac van honked and came to a halt next to you. barnes stepped out and greeted you all with a warm smile and the look of his eyes that clearly said 'i have to do this so just accept it'

you all looked at him questionly, but before he could explain, why he was even here, the back doors of the van opened and quill kipps, followed by his team members stepped outside.

"oh hell no" lockwood said loudly, but you knew that barnes couldn't do anything against it.

"sorry, tony" quill shrugged his shoulders and looked absolutely everything, but not sorry

"hey" said kat, before she hugged you in greeting, bobby and ned following

"hi" you smiled back at your former team members

quill was the last to greet you and he just touched you lightly at the arm.

"stay away" lockwood bid at him

"it's alright, anthony" you said softly. lockwood watched in disdain, how your eyes looked up at the blonde and followed his every move, you looked at him like he had hung the moon and lockwood stepped forward in protest

"it's alright, tony" quill repeated your words, softly stroking your cheek, before he stepped away. you immediately missed his touch.

"why are they here?" lockwood turned his head at barnes, waiting for an aexplanation.

"because it's a big building" barnes shrugged "it's already higher than your paygrade, so just be happy i'm still letting you on this case" he crossed his arms and waited for lockwood to protest.

lockwood looked between his friends and of course noticed your pleading face. "alright" he said between clenched teeth. "but we will get our fair share"

"of course" barnes nodded, before he got back into the car and drove off.

"cozy" kipps raised his eyebrows "so, what's the plan?"

"you're waiting for me to tell you?" lockwood asked in surprise

"well" kipps shrugged "you were here first" he paused and lockwood didn't miss the quick look in your direction "and i'm trying to be amicable"

"great" lockwood nodded sarcastically "i say we split up. your team will take the west wing and mine the other — wing, yeah"

"wouldn't it be smarter so split according to our talents?" lucy asked from behind the boy

"lucy" lockwood hissed

"yeah" kipps almost jumped into the air at the opportunity "that means y/n is coming with us and bobby stays with you"

"you must be mental if you really think i would let them go with you" lockwood walked closer to kipps

"it's alright" you pushed your arms in the middle of the two boys' bodies, seperating them.

"no, it's not" lockwood said

"it is!" he raised his eyebrows in surprise at the adamant tone in your voice

you reached for kipps' arm, dragging him into the building behind you. the rest of his team following.

"i will kill you if something happens to them" you could hear lockwood call after you

quill flashed a cheeky grin at lockwood over his shoulder, fully aware of the storm he had stirred up. you led quill and his team through the dimly lit corridors of the mysterious building, a mix of emotions swirling inside you. lockwood's warning echoed in your ears.

"what's wrong?" you asked, turning to face quill, when he halted in his step. he put a finger to his lips, signaling you to be quiet.

kat and ned had taken on the rooms down the corridor on the second floor, while you and quill had stayed back, searching the first floor.

“someone’s coming” quill whispered, reaching for your arm.

you saw the ghostly form approaching, slowly it came down the stairs. it was like if you had been frozen. the past years flashed before your eyes, the house and the touch of a ghost you had almost felt. you thought you had left it behind you.

“y/n!” quill shook you “y/n, come on” he was looking between you and the ghost. he noticed your eyes not moving from it.

“i—“ you tried to speak, but you weren’t able to utter a single word.

the ghost was too close now. quill drew his rapier, knowing that he would have to fight it on his own. and he put up quite a fight, throwing salt bombs, before he was finally able to get rid of it, atleast temporarily.

“we need to go” his hands were on your shoulders and the ghost was nowhere in sight, but you still looked so scared. quill knew that he was to blame for that. “y/n”

he could hear the ghost come back to life behind him. it did not take him longer to decide what he had to do. it was to no use to fight it off, he did not have anymore salt bombs and a source was nowhere in sight, not that he would’ve known what it was.

he picked you up, just as the ghost began charging at you. and he ran, calling for help or someone to finally pull a few silver net over potential sources.

someone might’ve actually found something, because right as it was too late, the ghost disappeared and quill came to a halt.

“y/n!” anthony called, sprinting into the hallway, closely followed by lucy, george and bobby. “thank god” he sighed when he noticed that you were alright.

“thank you” you looked at quill, who had saved you. “quill saved me” you said, turning your head to look at lockwood.

lockwood nodded, wearing a tight-lipped smile, before he outstretched his hand, shaking quills to thank him.

“i just did what i should’ve done a year ago” quill answered uncomfortably “i’m sorry for all the hurt i caused”

you nodded, already having made the decision that he was truly sorry and did not longer deserve to be punished for it.

“everything is okay, quill” you just said. quill smiled at you and even lockwood could not stop his features breaking into a grin.

uhh i definitely have to check it out then, thank you! i play on playstation!! i feel like i would be too lost on pc lmao 😂🫶🏻

hello, love, hope you're alright :)) is red dead redemption worth the hype? i'm thinking about buying it, as i have already played gta and a few other open world games. on which platform did you play it? 💋

hihi ml ! it 100% is !!!! you won’t regret if u buy it && i recommend it for both the story and the online version . although some people in online are rlly toxic i met a bunch who were fun to play with 💪💪 i play on pc !!

ofc!! i‘m so happy you like it!!! 💕💕

—bigger than the whole sky

pairing: theo nott x fem!reader

summary: you get bad news and theo is conflicted about it being his fault

warnings: sad, but ends in (kinda) fluff, trauma, mentions of war

theo was watching you as he always did as you sat at the avenclaw table, chattering with your friends.

his friends were used to that weird habit of his, it seemed like wherever you went, theo was close to watch over you.

"what is it with you and that girl?" mattheo's voice made theo raise his head.

"y/n?" theo asked surprised.

"of course, y/n" blaise rolled his eyes next to him. "what other girl could he possibly mean? all you ever do is stare at her"

"we're friends" theo shrugged. it was true. you guys weren't the best friends in the world but would occasionally meet up on the astronomy tower since you had run into each other there in third year. theo had recognized the book under your arm and you had spend and hour sitting and talking about it.

you often came there now to exchange books and read in silence or talk about them after you had finished them.

"yeah, looks like it" draco said sarcastically as he watched theo's eyes glide back to your form.

"just admit you're in love with her and they'll stop bugging you" pansy nudged the tall boy next to her and theo just shrugged.

"i don't know"

"you don't know, what?" draco asked with a raised brow "you don't know if you're in love with her?"

theo nodded his head and his friends sighed simultaneously.

"how can you not know that?" enzo spoke for the first time "have you never been in love?"

"just because you fall in love with every girl you see, doesn't mean we all do" mattheo joked and enzo frowned at him.

"i'm just not sure, okay?" theo said defensively, without taking his eyes off of you "and even if.. it would never work"

without theo noticing, pansy smiled at him, as he watched his eyes light up as you noticed his eyes and raised your hand, waving at him. "how do you feel around her?" pansy asked softly.

"warm" theo simply said, before he continued "when she looks at me, it feels like the sun glazing my skin during the summer. and when she laughs it sounds like the wind moving the trees. i have the need to keep her safe all the time, even though i know that nothing will happen to her here"

"i think you have your answer, mate" blaise said and theo had never noticed him sounding so sincere and serious. he looked between his friends. they all spotted a similar expression, atleast until his eyes fell on pansy, who looked like she was about to cry.

"that was beautiful" she muttered, while she snuffled her nose "why don't you ever say things like that about me, draco?"

draco's eyes widened in surprise, before his face spotted an expression similar to betrayal, as he turned his head to look at theo. "thanks, mate, for raising the bar to the sky"

pansy slapped his arm and draco's eyes were back on her again, just like theo had already turned his head back at you, not even hearing a word of what draco had said.

you threw your head back, laughing at something the girl next to you had said, before you turned your head and raised your eyebrows in surprise as an unfamiliar owl landed on the table in front of you.

theo raised his eyebrows too. he watched as you ripped open the letter and your eyes scanned the paper. he could not read the expression on your face and was wondering what you were thinking, when you quickly muttered something to the girl next to you and stood up, rushing out of the hall.

"was she crying?" blaise asked surprised and theo quickly remembered seeing a few tears slipping over your cheeks.

and then he knew what letter you had just gotten.

"a ministry owl" he said for his friends to hear. he didn't have to further explain. they all knew what that meant

"oh" pansy said and all color vanished from her face. "do you think..?" she left the question unfinished and theo just nodded.

"where do you think she'll go?"

"i know where" theo muttered "but i'm not sure that i should be the one to comfort her now"

"what? why not?" mattheo shrugged "you clearly love her"

theo looked up from the table and his friends noticed the hint of tears in his eyes "what if it was my father? i can't possibly try to comfort her, when i'm one of them, can i?"

"you're not one of them" pansy shook her head "you're not you're father, none of us are our parents"

"that doesn't matter. there's a war brewing and when it comes down to it, i'm on the wrong side"

"you're still her friend" draco argued.

"draco is right and that you're conflicted on all this shows how much you care enough to not let your beliefs come between you two" pansy said.

"go" enzo nodded.

theo stood up from the table and walked out of the hall in a quick step. he took two steps at once when he walked up the astronomy tower. just like he expected you were already there.

you were staring down to the grounds of hogwarts, while quite tears ran over your cheeks. they were reddened just like your eyes and despite it all, theo thought that you were incredibly beautiful.

you turned around when one of the floorboards made a sound when he stepped closer, but quickly relaxed once you noticed it was him.

"hey" theo muttered, before he sat down beside you. "is it alright if i sit with you?"

"you already are" you shrugged, but there was no malicious intent in your voice and theo relaxed.

you sighed, before you pushed the letter from the ministry in the taller boys direction. theo's eyes scanned the words on the page.

"they burned our whole house down" theo looked up from the paper when you started speaking. "they didn't find my parents once the aurors arrived. they're not sure if they could flee, or if the death eaters took them"

"i'm sorry" theo muttered, while he folded the paper. "i hope they're alright. i wish i could do something"

"you've come here" you said softly, before you moved closer to him, before you put your head an his shoulder. theo reluctantly raised his arm, before he gently rested his hand on your shoulder, pulling you closer.

"do they know who did it?"

"mmh?"

"do they know which death eaters--" you sat up suddenly and theo fell silent.

you frowned at him, scrunching your eyebrows together as you thought about what he was implying with that. you were not stupid, you knew that many of your classmates parent's were involved with the wrong people.

theo just stared at you blankly, while you did the same. neither of you said a word, before he tried to look away.

"what are you talking about?" you asked, bringing his attention back to you.

"nothing, i just--"

you could read the sadness and regret in his eyes. he looked like he was personally at fault for whatever had happened to your home and family.

"you think your father could have done it"

his eyes widened when he heard the anger in your voice. he watched as you stood up from the floor and walked to the middle of the tower.

"y/n" theo muttered, as he rose to his feet and followed you. he was interpreting your anger in the wrong way. "i'm sorry, i know that i--"

"that you what?" you said angrily as your turned around to look at him. "this is not your fault, theo. you don't get to think or say it is"

theo raised his eyebrows as he realized what you were really angry about. you weren't angry that both of your lifes had been dedicated to opposing sides through the acting of your parents. no, you were angry that he thought he was somehow to blame for something that had been decided before he was born.

"i don't know what i can do, y/n" theo said helplessly "i want to comfort you, but how could i when there's a chance that i'm a part of what caused your hurt" "you're not part of any hurt, theo" you shook your head "what's happening out there has nothing to do with you and me"

"but what if it has?" theo gulped and tears shimmered in his eyes "what if the war comes and we have to kill each other"

"i won't let it come to that"

"how can you know?"

"i don't know anything, i just know that right now, all i want is for you to hold me"

theo looked at you for a few seconds and you weren't sure if he would just turn around and walk away, but he softly nodded his head, before he opened his arms, so that you could step inside.

after a few minutes, you softly stepped back and took his face in both of your hands.

"i don't know what's going to happen to us, theo" you whispered as theo watched you closely. he felt the warmth of your hands on his cheeks and your touch felt so familiar that he wasn't sure if he could ever live without it. "all i know is that we will not become the victims of our parents decisions"

theo nodded and you did the same. he softly kissed your forehead, before he brought you back to his chest and just held you for what felt long enough to fix anything that had not yet happened to you.

hiii !!! i really love your writing style, and i'm just obsessed with your account in general, i'm just wondering how you started writing?? any tips for beginners? i'm trying to start writing more, but i can't think of a scenario, or i get stuck at some point. any help is appreciated 😭 thank you !!! mwah !! 🫶🏻

hello my love, please excuse my late answer. first, thank you so much for the compliments, you're the sweetest!!! i've been writing basically all my life and i think whats most important for writing is inspiration. i spent so many years reading fanfiction and thinking about topics i would like to read about, just to notice that no one had written them yet so i tried to fill that space myself, with a lot of failing lmao.. but at some point i realized that it's just as fun to write as it is to read other people's stuff.

when i start to write something, i always make sure i'm passionate about the project. i start by imagining scenes that i would love to read about myself, decide on a taylor song i want to use, which does generate even more inspiration and search pinterest for aesthetics and more insparation.

i know what it's like getting stuck while writing (ask the thousand unfinished wips of books i tried to write), but sometimes i try to just write anything, even if its rubbish at first, at least you wrote a few more words.

or just think about the least expectable answer to a simple question and keep in mind that every answer reflect your characters personality. if you let your character answer something unexpectably it might turn the conversation into a different direction. and different is good, it's fun and sometimes you just feel what could be right for the story, without knowing it before. but if you need help to come up with a concept, try to look at blogs on here, who provide prompts or funny quotes to start your story off on.

one of my favorite creators is @creativepromptsforwriting (she also has great tips for writing, far better than any i could give you)

and just to emphasize what i said before, i'm going to show you what i mean by wiriting a little scene between theo and pixie from my series don't blame me:

example quote: you look good

so, to accurately write this scene, you should think about your characters personality, but also the relationship between them.

so it could be like this:

theo: you look good

pixie: thank you

and that would be it. but this conversation doesn't fit either their personality nor their relationship, and a great plus is also that it would be a longer interaction if you let them react differently:

theo: you look good

pixie: what are you trying to do right now?

theo: i don't know, genius, maybe compliment you?

pixie: well, don't expect to get one back, i wouldn't want to inflate your ego any further

theo: aren't you just a ray of sunshine...

pixie: complementing me again huh?

theo: sure...

so this is what i would come up with on the spot and i hope i could help you a bit, but this is mostly what i do when i write and then i just keep writing honestly. what i can tell you is that it will be easier the more you write, you get a feeling for it eventually. so in simpler terms: don't stress too much for perfection (had to learn that the hard way) just write and see what happens and just keep in mind that any word you write will help you to get better at writing, so nothing has to be perfect from the get go. i mean, has anyone ever sat down at a piano and just started playing?

good luck on your journey, i wish you all the fun at writing!!! ❤️

hiii!! how are you?? i have a question, at the beginning of july i requested a matheo riddle fic, and i see that you have not updated your waiting list (since before i requested) and my requests not on it, so im wondering if you are writing something thats not on your waiting list, maybe my request just didnt go through or smth ^^’

heyyy! i have a few outstanding requests that aren’t on there yet, because i either didn’t have the time to add them or i don’t have a good title yet, but i will be updating the waiting list in the next few days. let me know if it still isn’t on there by then, then it might’ve not gone through, but i do have to add a few mattheo requests!! 💗

Hello! I read all of your Lockwood&Co fics in one sitting and loved all of them ♡

I was wondering if you could write reader x kipps, where reader and kipps would work in the same Fittes team when they were younger, but some incident would happen that was kipp's fault and would almost cost reader their life. Reader would leave Fittes after that. Few years later they would somehow meet again, maybe reader in different agency and kipps in Fittes would work together on a case, reader still feeling hurt and bitter and acting hostile towards kipps. But the reader would get in grave danger again, but this time kipps would save them, and have his redemption arc. Something like crushing on each other to enemies to lovers again <3 lots of angst w fixing it. I hope I explained it at least a bit understandably.

Love your writing and looking forward to next piece <3

you can find this here: the moment i knew

thank you and sorry it took me so long! i’m not sure if it’s what you wanted but i tried my best!! <3