There Is No Way This Guy Managed To Get A Mascot Worthy Animal On Accident.

There is no way this guy managed to get a mascot worthy animal on accident.

Hello! I run the social media for my local library and I was just wondering what sort of plant or creature might emerge if I talk about books here. Just a lil guy perhaps, to encourage public library use. A new library mascot to say "Books are cool! Reading is fun!" etc. Thank you for your time and efforts. 📚

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Closest match: Lutra lutra genome assembly, chromosome: 14 Common name: Eurasian Otter

The Iron Wanker is perfect for him, but I personally love the Iron Maidenless more because I now have an image of Needles getting fucking pissed because someone sent him some variations of the "No Bitches?" meme which would be amazing.

Needles compared himself to an iron maiden, but he uses he/him pronouns. Here are some more masculine-coded versions of the phrase, which have the side benefit of conferring to Needles the level of respect he deserves:

The Iron Incel

The Iron Unfuckable

The Iron Maidenless

The Iron Foreveralone

The Iron Wanker

i found this one funny

here

I'm sorry it's HOW MANY YEARS OLD?!

girl help they’re playing music that was popular when i was in high school and making me feel nostalgic for an era of my life i have zero desire to return to

Just rebloging for future use don't mind me.

Another worldbuilding application of the "two layer rule": To create a culture while avoiding The Planet Of Hats (the thing where a people only have one thing going for them, like "everyone wears a silly hat"): You only need two hats.

Try picking two random flat culture ideas and combine them, see how they interact. Let's say taking the Proud Warrior Race - people who are all about glory in battle and feats of strength, whose songs and ballads are about heroes in battle and whose education consists of combat and military tactics. Throw in another element: Living in diaspora. Suddenly you've got a whole more interesting dynamic going on - how did a people like this end up cast out of their old native land? How do they feel about it? How do they make a living now - as guards, mercenaries? How do their non-combatants live? Were they always warrior people, or did they become fighters out of necessity to fend for themselves in the lands of strangers? How do the peoples of these lands regard them?

Like I'm not shitting, it's literally that easy. You can avoid writing an one-dimensional culture just by adding another equally flat element, and the third dimension appears on its own just like that. And while one of the features can be location/climate, you can also combine two of those with each other.

Let's take a pretty standard Fantasy Race Biome: The forest people. Their job is the forest. They live there, hunt there, forage there, they have an obnoxious amount of sayings that somehow refer to trees, woods, or forests. Very high chance of being elves. And then a second common stock Fantasy Biome People: The Grim Cold North. Everything is bleak and grim up there. People are hardy and harsh, "frostbite because the climate hates you" and "being stabbed because your neighbour hates you" are the most common causes of death. People are either completely humourless or have a horrifyingly dark, morbid sense of humour. They might find it funny that you genuinely can't tell which one.

Now combine them: Grim Cold Bleak Forest People. The summer lasts about 15 minutes and these people know every single type of berry, mushroom and herb that's edible in any fathomable way. You're not sure if they're joking about occasionally resorting to eating tree bark to survive the long dark winter. Not a warrior people, but very skilled in disappearing into the forest and picking off would-be invaders one by one. Once they fuck off into the woods you won't find them unless they want to be found.

You know, Finland.

A platypus with a bomb?

PERRY THE PLATYPUS WITH A BOMB!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

I am so sorry for the poor editing btw

Blastypus