Thanks For The Help! I'll Check Out That Website When I Get The Chance!

Thanks for the help! I'll check out that website when I get the chance!

I know I have trauma that really affected me, I just have a hard time with knowing how much and shit.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx)

Random, but can any systems/plural beings talk about how they figured out that they are plural?

DID, OSDD, endo, etc. Any version of systems or plurals

I have questioned DID or something similar to just myself and 1 or 2 friends irl before. I'm unsure if my trauma was "enough" or happened at "the right time" or whatever to be able to cause a dissociative disorder.

If anyone has any websites or similar things to suggest to help me, pls send me them.

I mostly try and stay out of plural/system things cause once again I am unsure if I am one in any way. And to go into a community that I am not sure I am in feels off.

Using I/me/my/etc. sometimes feels wrong, and we/us/our/etc. feel right even if just referring to "me." But sometimes I/me/my/etc. feels fine/right, so idk.

Please give me advice or at least share your experiences if you're able/willing to. Thanks

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/hx) [if I find out I'm a system/plural in some way, this sign off thing will probably be changed around].

More bad memories from my life as Zuki. Cause of course my brain hates me.

Tw: abuse, school abuse[? Idk what to call it], muzzles, quirk discrimination, shock collars, bullying, I think that's it for this one?

When I was younger, my bio mother was told to use a muzzle and shock collar that "neutralized" quirks on me. Cause my quirk was "dangerous" and "needed to be controlled." These were supposed to be illegal to use on anyone, even the most dangerous villain. But of course, people didn't listen and used them on those with "evil" or "villain" quirks (especially certain mutant related quirks).

It kinda makes sense that a hero like my bio mother could get one, but what's 'interesting' is that once I got into middle school, some of the teachers also had them. I don't know where they got them, but whatever. My middle school and high school both used the muzzles and shock collars on me.

When I was in middle school, I was still very cautious and shit. I never fought back, I never started a fight, I never did any of that. But yet anytime someone attacked me, I got punished. They would put the muzzle on me saying something about how I was bad and deserved it and the same thing with the shock collar. But 'luckily' the shock collar was less often used.

In high school is when I started fighting back sometimes. It was still usually only if someone else was being hurt [whether physically or verbally]. When it was just me, I would usually not fight back. Sometimes, I did fight back when it was just against me fully, though.

This is all I'm gonna talk about rn.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/he)

When I once again remember that I need to go to therapy in this life. But because I still live with my dad and older brother [I am only 19 before you say anything and am also disabled in multiple ways] I would likely be forced into or "recommended" a Christian therapy place when I am not a Christian (my dad and brother do not know that and they won't until I move out).

This is why I don't see a therapist rn, pretty much, lol. I need to find one, though, and would really like one that will understand and accept my alterhumanity/nonhumanity and shit.

Random little rant/vent? Not really a vent, but idk what to call this

If I remember to actually check my asks, I'll participate!

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)

alterhuman trick-or-treat!

as october comes to an end, the time for Spooky approaches. the creatures of the night awaken, their reflecting eyes shine in the darkness. and what better way to celebrate than a good old trick-or-treat?

inbox trick-or-treating is a beloved tradition here on tumblr, which consists in sending an ask to the blog(s) of you choice as if they were houses in your neighborhood and you were the kid politely knocking on their door. you would ask, "trick or treat?" and the asked would then choose whether to reply with a treat (picture of candy) or a trick (a joke, a poem, a haiku, a drawing...).

well... thats the normal one anyways.

i propose something a bit different this year: an alterhuman-themed trick-or-treat! what is that, youll ask? simple: the 31st of october, instead of sharing candy, we will share our 'types snacks! for example, if youre a cat therian you can share a fish-shaped treat, if youre fictionkin you can share your favorite food from your source, if youre alienkin you can share your cultures traditional dish... the possibilities are endless!

how to participate? reblog this post to let your followers know youre doing this! the 31st ill send an ask to everyone who interacted with this post so no one misses out on the fun. see you on halloween!

I mostly try and stay off of Tumblr too much when I'm age regressed cause I never know what I'll see cause not everything is tagged well and stuff.

However, I am on rn while regressed, lol. I wanna talk about memories [happier ones] to do with agere in my life as Zuki.

While I am very much in a partly regressed partly not most of the time in this life, I could fully regress most of the time in my life as Zuki.

When I was regressed, I liked to be called pup by a few people that I gave permission to. Dad and pa had permission as did Toshi and Zuku. Also Kari and Kats, lol.

Kats rarely called me pup though and it wasn't around others really, reputation or something like that, lol.

Being called pup always helped me with regressing as well, so it was pretty much just used when I was already regressed or wanting or needing to regress, lol.

Dad would be able to tell when I needed to regress even if I said I didn't want or need to, lol. He would usually call me pup when he noticed, and then I would regress almost instantly. Sometimes, I would say I wasn't little when I was regressed, lol.

Pa had a harder time seeing through my lies or whatever you wanna call them, lol. But was very great when I was regressed and he knew about it.

Zuku had an even easier time knowing this stuff than dad did cause he knew me longer and stuff. The first person to know about my regression and one of my favorites to go to.

Toshi, like pa, had a hard time knowing this stuff. But was amazing when he took care of me when I was little.

Kari knew almost as much as Zuku, lol. Kari also regressed sometimes [as did Zuku and Toshi and some others], so that helped. They were one of the ones I loved being around best while regressed, but all the ones mentioned are the best ones I loved being around, lol.

Kats knew a little less than Zuku but about the same as dad. He was also cool to be around while I was little, although you probably wouldn't guess that, lol.

This is all I'm gonna mention rn, so yeah.

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it/xe) :3c

3rd & 4th poems to post. Posting these together cause they are related.

Tw/cw: violence(?), tearing skin, and bone mention.

Bare my Teeth and Tear 'my' Skin & Bare my Claws and Tear 'my' Skin

I want to bare my teeth

And tear at 'my' skin

Until all that's left

Is the bone underneath

For the bone will be

More right than the skin

Despite it still

Being wrong

But I cannot

For this body's

Teeth are not sharp

Enough to tear the skin

So I bare my teeth

At the image in the mirror

For it is wrong

It is not right

-------------------------------------------------------

I want to bare my claws

And tear at 'my' skin

Until all that's left

Is the bone underneath

For the bone will be

More right than the skin

Despite it still

Being wrong

But I cannot

For this body's

'Nails' are not sharp

Enough to tear the skin

So I bare my claws

At the image in the mirror

For it is wrong

It is not right

- Zuki Shay Lupo (They/it)