Donghyuck Smut - Tumblr Posts

✨SWALLOW YOUR WORDS – l.d.h.✨

© sparklysung – 2021. all rights reserved. no reposts, modifications and/or translations allowed.

pairing – lee donghyuck x female!reader

genre – smut | non-idol!au, enemies to lovers!au

warnings – switch!donghyuck, switch!reader, lap dance, cumming in pants, grinding, dry humping, cum eating, hair pulling (giving and receiving), spanking, mirror sex, protected sex (reader’s on the pill), degradation, dirty talk, bondage (belt), possessiveness (i guess?)

word count – 6.043 words

summary – it only took a couple of words to make the blood boil in your veins and being the competitive individual you are, you had to prove lee donghyuck, your all-time enemy, wrong.

note – not my best, probably could've done better, but oh well. also this was frkng hard to write, damn, and i may have changed things a bit? BUT, i think it's better like this so… hope you enjoy! btw, i got the idea while reading this, so go check it out –it's good–.

taglist – @prvncejxon, @iwishihadabettername

another friday night wasting your time at some random classmate’s party. you were everything but happy to be there. you didn’t even want to go there in the first place, only finding yourself sitting on the kitchen counter, drink in hand and an ugly scowl adorning your face, because of your annoying best friend.

“hey, i get it, you didn’t wanna come here when you could have been peacefully sleeping in the comfort of your room, but come on, at least try to have some fun. you’re already here anyway.” eunbin –aka your annoying best friend– said, pouting her lips in a failed attempt of looking cute.

you kind of felt bad for her, you suppose it wasn’t exactly easy to deal with your lazy ass. but still, she was supposed to love you and appreciate you just the way you were.

and most of the time she did, just not in this specific situation.

“this isn’t fun at all, i just wanna go home. there’s nothing in here for me at all.”

you brought the red plastic cup to your lips, taking a sip of the bitter liquid eunbin had mixed for you. you weren’t lying, there really wasn’t anything that would make you want to stay, only a few friends of yours getting drunk somewhere in the big house you were currently in.

“come on, please, stay for me,” eunbin fake cried, and for a moment you thought she was going to give up and let you go. “in a bit the guys are gonna play something fun! we should join them, please?” as her last resort, she looked at you with puppy eyes. she was playing dirty and she knew it, you both knew you couldn’t resist them.

giving in with an exasperated sigh, you jumped off the counter to get yourself another drink from the bar in the living room. you were minding your own business until you heard him, the last person you wanted to see at the moment.

“so, i’m telling you guys, she was literally begging me to fuck her, she even moaned while sucking me off–,” donghyuck’s obnoxious voice filled your ears, making you roll your eyes. he was surrounded by a couple of other guys you didn’t know so well but were sure you had seen them before around campus hanging out with him.

“shut up already, dongdong, no one wants to hear it.” you interrupted, walking past him and towards the half empty bottle of vodka on the bar counter.

the group of boys stopped abruptly, all of them turning to look at you, ready for the scene that was going to take place in matter of minutes. donghyuck’s attention also turned to you, biting back a triumphant smirk with a raised eyebrow. he could see past you so he didn’t mind the mocking nickname you used; he could tell you were trying to irritate him enough to make him go away. but he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. he had been eyeing you all night, trying to find ways to get under your skin to catch your attention. and finally, after staying at a safe distance for a while to not spark suspicions, he got what he wanted.

“why so feisty, babe.” the cocky smirk he gave you just made your blood boil, the growing desire to punch it off his pretty face only getting stronger the more you stared at him.

“don’t you get tired of talking shit all day?” you barked, eyes trained on his body while pouring yourself a good amount of alcohol.

you were certainly going to need a lot of liquid courage to get through the night.

“you boast about girls begging for you but i think you’re just trying to hide the fact that you’re the one who has to beg to get laid.”

“i don’t beg, baby.” you rolled your eyes and muttered a ‘sure’. “also, if you’re jealous of me fucking other girls you just had to say it. i wouldn’t be against giving it to you instead.” the stupid wink he threw at you made your body shake in anger, already fed up with the conversation.

“you wish, asshole.”

“actually, i do.”

donghyuck was so fucking annoying, always teasing you and never leaving you alone. your personalities clashed constantly resulting in fights filled with screams and curses, sometimes to the extent of interrupting the class and getting the two of you kicked out of it. he enjoyed watching you struggle and suffer due to his awful pranks, so you were his favorite target. you couldn’t even have a proper date with anyone because he made sure to mess it up either by scaring the crap out of the guy or sabotaging your plans. he almost completely ruined your love life and cockblocked you forever.

you did not get along and everyone knew it.

although eunbin thought it was pure sexual tension and you just needed to get your frustrations off of you with a good fuck.

it wasn’t though.

or was it?

“let’s go hang out with the guys,” your best friend nudged your arm excitedly and you sighed, not feeling like playing anything with them. every time you decided to give in and take part in ‘something fun’ with the guys, it always ended up with you either in trouble or scarred for life.

you had a bad feeling about this all.

“ugh, fine.” she cheered and pulled you through the crowd of drunk people until you reached the basement.

the sound of laughter and screams drowned the music blasting upstairs, there were empty bottles of alcohol sprawled all over the floor and tables and a circle of people in the middle of the room. both of you joined the group with you sitting between eunbin and mark, a close friend of yours that you sadly shared with donghyuck. while you casually chatted and played around with the boy, happily laughing the night away, you could feel a pair of eyes burn holes into your skull. you didn’t have to look up to know who those eyes belonged to, as said person wasn’t even trying to dissimulate.

and by said person you meant donghyuck.

donghyuck hated the way you leaned on mark’s body, how you let his friend rest his head on top of yours and wrap his arm around your waist.

he was jealous, really jealous of your close friendship with the older boy.

mark and you had been friends for a long time now and you could even consider him your best friend, so you were comfortable around each other. you usually hugged, held hands and cuddled, he was used to you wearing his clothes –half of your closet were stolen hoodies that once belonged to him–, he even had a spare change of clothes in his room just in case you decided to drop by for an improvised sleepover. so it wasn’t surprising when sometimes when the two of you hung out on your own, people –even your friends in common– mistook you as a couple.

and the idea of you two dating made donghyuck feel sick to the stomach.

“we’re playing truth or dare, who wants to start?” seoyeon, one of your friends, spoke while looking around for someone to volunteer.

“i’ll go.” lucas raised his hand and everyone nodded, not minding.

the game went smoothly for a while and eventually, the more alcohol everybody drank, the crazier things got. mark ended up getting dared to lick whipped cream off of yuta’s chest and xiaojun had to cross-dress and dance on a table. everything was fine, you hadn’t been picked by anyone yet so you were pretty much having fun just enjoying the show.

until someone called your name.

“y/n, truth or dare?” jaehyun asked with a smirk.

he had an evil glint on his eyes making you feel suspicious. you knew you couldn’t choose truth or else everyone would make fun of you for being a pussy. and jaehyun just knew you well enough to know you weren’t going to let that happen.

you weren’t one to back down.

still, the way he stared at you made an uneasy feeling settle in your stomach.

what could he possibly have in mind?

“dare.”

seems like your gut feeling was right after all.

“give hyuck a lap dance,” jaehyun said immediately after the words left you mouth, making everyone in the room shake, some in excitement and some –you– in anger. donghyuck wasn’t expecting to take part in the dare, but he really wasn’t complaining either. “thank me later babe,” his shit-eating grin only adding fuel to the fire.

fuck.

just as eunbin, donghyuck could sense the sexual tension. and unlike you, he acknowledged it.

but for him it wasn’t just that.

you two had known each other –or at least acknowledged each other's existence– for a few years now, since high school. he was forced to see you almost every day at school, so, naturally, fondness for you started growing slowly in his chest. but it wasn’t until you both left for college that your ‘enemies’ label was established.

and if someone thought he may possibly like you, they were damn right.

he did.

it all started during freshman year, when he tried to befriend you during one of the classes you shared. you seemed irritated by his advances and wanted him away from you, so after a few attempts of softening your heart, he resolved that the only way to stay close to you was annoying the hell out of you.

childish? yeah. he cared? not really.

“come here, babe.” donghyuck tongued the inside of his cheek, a smirk forming on his lips. as he saw the grim look on your face, he sprawled his legs, patting his toned thigh invitingly, eager to get things started.

the look jaehyun gave you had ‘you’re not backing down, are you?’ written all over.

“shit, i hate jaehyun, why did he have to do me dirty like that?” you mumbled angrily to eunbin and she just laughed, finding the situation way funnier than you.

“maybe tonight won’t be as boring as you thought? maybe you’ll end up getting laid.” she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and you only scoffed, “shut up, dumbass.”

“why did you have to do me like that, huh?!” you almost screamed at the older, taking a mental note to beat him up later. he just shrugged and threw you a wink, “asshole.”

mark patted your back to help you relax, he could see you weren’t exactly happy about your dare.

“come on, which song would you like, my lady?” lucas asked, scrolling through his spotify for suiting songs.

“or nah!” yangyang answered before you could even open your mouth. just as you were about to ask for a less sexual song, cheering erupted through the room.

everyone was pumped, adrenaline running through their veins and pushing them to do stupid stuff they would probably regret the next day after waking up hungover. and things just took a rather interesting turn, so they obviously were excitedly awaiting the next series of events.

yay, more stupid memories to regret later.

on the other hand, donghyuck was as doomed as you. he knew the song well, he knew the lyrics by heart but what he didn’t know was if he could control himself with you basically dry humping him in front of a bunch of people to the rhythm of it.

he wasn’t sure it was a great idea.

as soon as you got up to complete the dare, you heard cheering and clapping. and you weren’t going to lie, you wanted to throw yourself out of a window.

breathing deeply in an attempt of relaxing to just get it over with, you made your way towards donghyuck until you were standing a few feet in front of him.

as the music started playing, you started moving. running your finger on the surface of his clothed shoulder, you walked slowly around him, like a predator circling its prey. he tried not to follow your movements, already getting anxious by your closeness and nervously waiting for your next move.

i’ma smoke this joint then i’ma break you off.

i’d be lying if i said you ain’t the one.

you pushed his legs open and settled between them. your hands rubbed his thighs teasingly, fingers drawing closer to his crotch but not quite getting there. you took your sweet time feeling him up, softly scratching his strong arms and leaving red trails behind. donghyuck was so into it, enjoying the sight of you kneeling before him so much that his pants were already starting to feel tight.

heard you not the type that you take home to mom.

is we fuckin’ when we leave the club or nah?

i ain’t spendin’ cash for nothin’ i wanna see you take it off.

and oh how he wanted to see you take it off. all night he couldn’t take his eyes off of your figure, you looked really good in the outfit eunbin had chosen for you.

so good it was almost making him drool.

you sat on his lap, hands going to caress his toned chest and stomach. it was well-known that donghyuck exercised frequently, but it still surprised you. he felt so good you had to bite your lip to prevent a sound from coming out.

when you shifted to sit closer to him, his hands flew to your hips and you could tell his intention was to move them lower to grope your ass, but you weren’t having it.

do you like the way i flick my tongue or nah?

you can ride my face until you’re drippin’ cum.

“if you try to touch me again, i’ll tie you up,” you said with a sweet smile plastered on your face, grabbing him by the wrists and harshly dropping them away from you. donghyuck let out a startled gasp at that, obviously not expecting your attitude. with his hands twitching to grasp anything, he went to grip tightly the sides of the chair.

can you lick the tip then throat the dick or nah?

can you let me stretch that pussy out or nah?

your hips ground against his crotch at such a slow pace that donghyuck was having trouble not pushing you down on him faster. he was getting embarrassingly hornier as seconds passed and wanted nothing more than to fuck you right then and there, even with his friends’ eyes on you both.

donghyuck tried so hard to restrain himself from touching you. he wasn’t one to follow orders, but he tried just for you, he really did.

i’m not the type to call you back tomorrow.

but the way you wrappin’ ‘round me is a prob.

and everything was fine until you kissed him. synchronized gasps filled the room, the sudden show of affection confusing everybody. not even your intoxicated self could understand what the hell were you doing nor who you were doing it with. his breath got stuck in his throat, heart thumping against his chest at an alarming rate. his hands almost tried to bring you closer, but he realized what he was doing on time to stop himself.

he finally broke down when your mouth sucked on his tongue, making his hips grind up against yours unconsciously as his hands grabbed you by your waist, pressing your body flush against his.

that was it.

“you asked for it,” your movements came to a stop as you took off your black leather belt, sticking to your threat of tying him up if he didn’t quit it.

pussy so good, i had to save that shit for later.

took her to the kitchen, fucked her right there on the table.

“oh shit,” donghyuck stirred under you trying to get out of the situation.

this couldn’t be happening.

“no, please,” he whimpered as you fastened the belt until it was wrapped tightly around his wrists, locking his arms behind his back. your audience was unable to hold in their surprise, some mouths falling open. he fought against the restraints to no avail, desperate to free himself, “please, let me go,” he cried out quietly, not wanting the other occupants in the room to hear him.

“stop complaining or else i’ll also gag you,” you spat harshly in his ear, done with his attitude, and he swallowed hard. as you nibbled on his lobe, you felt a strong sense of confidence. it made your chest swell in pride to see the usual big mouth jerk with a smug grin constantly attached to his face falling apart under your touch.

seems like he was the one to beg, after all.

you moved your hips to the rhythm of the music, making sure to press harder against the sensitive tip of his cock, which was already leaking precum. although you weren’t an expert, you’d given a fair share of lap dances, so you knew what you were doing.

and donghyuck could certainly tell.

don’t play with a boss, girl take it off.

take it for a real one.

you gon’ get it all.

“whose bitch are you now, huh?” donghyuck couldn’t speak properly, way too hot and bothered for his brain to come up with any smart-ass response.

you tsked disapprovingly at his lack of response.

“when i ask you a question, you answer.” your fingers tangled in his hair and with a harsh tug you forced him to look up. donghyuck was dazed, lips swollen from you biting on them, eyes glassy from arousal, and mind clouded with lust.

“yours.” he whimpered quietly, forgetting momentarily about your audience.

“good boy.”

you loved how easy it was for you to break him and leave him wanting more, to have him so putty in your hands. specially since hearing comments of other female classmates about donghyuck teasing them almost till the brim of tears was part of your day-to-day life. it felt like you were getting revenge for all of them, so you were enjoying it a lot more than anyone could imagine.

your plump lips trailed down the length of his neck, leaving wet kisses along his honey-like skin, and he threw his head back to give you more access. as you licked, sucked and bit the flesh, donghyuck could hear his heartbeat loud over the music. he usually wouldn’t let a girl suck hickeys on his skin, but the idea of you marking him while everyone watched was rather exciting.

he swore the seconds passed slower than usual. you were just halfway through the song but he didn’t know if he could survive any longer.

donghyuck felt light-headed and painfully aroused, and he wasn’t going to last long if you kept kissing him and moving your hips the way you were.

“i’ma go as far as you let me,” your movements became slower to tease him, making the poor boy want to cry in agony. his jeans felt way too tight to be comfortable and he hoped everyone could just leave you two alone to take it off.

“shit, please,” donghyuck’s eyes closed, head falling forward and hanging low as drops of sweat slid down his forehead. the room felt like an oven and he didn’t know if it was a result of the significant amount of people in such a small space, the alcohol, his choice of clothing or your body pressed closely against his.

probably the latter.

girl, is you sucking me or fucking me or nah?

can i bring another bitch? let’s have a threesome.

“keep saying you’re a freak, you gon’ prove it or nah?” you quietly sang along, pulling his face closer by his hair and grinding down on him harder.

donghyuck was going crazy, he had never expected you to be so sexy, to behave so dirtily. but he loved it, and by the prominent tent in his pants, everybody could tell he was in for the ride of his life.

you’s a ride-or-die chick, you with this shit or nah?

say you not a side bitch, you all-in or nah?

you gon’ make them eggs cheesy with them grits or nah?

you brought him in for a hot kiss that left his head spinning.

donghyuck was growing restless as his climax neared, he was so close he could almost taste it. he couldn’t remember when the last time he got so close to cumming only from some teasing was.

everything was happening so quickly he wasn’t able to stop himself before giving in to the pleasure.

“h-holy fuck,” with a shaky moan that you swallowed, donghyuck shot his load, staining the crotch of his dark jeans. you could feel the wetness seeping through the piece of clothing and dampening your bottoms. his hips gave a few more sloppy thrusts, legs shaking weakly and cock twitching from the confines of his jeans, before falling limp on the chair.

or nah.

as the song ended, he came down from his high. you freed him from the iron grip of your belt, the skin on his wrists was red and slightly swollen. you may have tightened it too much in the heat of the moment, but you weren’t apologizing after giving him probably the best orgasm of his life.

the bewildered expression on his face quickly turned grim as it hit him.

he came in his pants like a fucking teenager.

in a room full of people.

in front of his friends, yours and you.

his friends stood there, both confused and surprised to see donghyuck so affected by your touch. nobody had expected things to end the way they did.

“damn, are you okay my man?” johnny asked, laughing at his friend’s flustered state.

“shut up,” donghyuck answered bitterly. he shot up from his seat, grabbing your hand and shoving you inside the nearest bathroom in the house. he didn’t even care to cover the wet spot on his pants, walking with his chin up and a scowl plastered on his face.

and blame it on how riled up you had gotten from the feeling of his hard dick pressing against your needy pussy, but damn, he looked good.

“i wanna go next!” hendery spoke excitedly. you couldn’t tell if he was just messing with you or if he actually wanted you to give him a lap dance too. either way, it made your lips turn upwards in a smug grin.

once you both made it to the bathroom, he locked the door before pushing you against it, back pressed flush into the hard piece of wood. the ambience took a 180 turn, your confidence faltered slightly at the sight of his angry form.

“you think it’s funny, yeah?” he hummed angrily in your ear. “you think i’d let you do whatever you want and embarrass me in front of my friends just because you feel like it without payback?” the look on his eyes getting darker as the words left his mouth.

“if so, oh baby, you were so wrong.”

trying to test him, you decided to answer.

“you’re all bark and no bite, what else am i supposed to think?” you smirked devilishly when you saw him clench his jaw.

“you’re gonna regret being a brat,” his slender fingers wrapped themselves around your waist and with a harsh tug, he pulled you closer to attack your lips, biting and sucking on them, making your legs wobbly. he tasted sweet and bitter at the same time, probably from the liquor he had been drinking all night, and you couldn’t seem to get enough. his lips were soft and plush as they mingled with yours, teeth roughly clashing and tongues fighting for dominance, “am i?”

donghyuck hissed through his teeth as he unbuckled his pants, letting his cum-covered shaft spring free. he was already hard and you unconsciously rubbed your thighs together to ease some of the tension building up between them. his hand shot to your throat, tightening his grip until you couldn’t breathe properly, before forcing you on your knees.

donghyuck tapped his hard and heavy cock on your lips a couple of times before speaking. “open up, slut,” and you did as you were told, parting your lips and poking your tongue out, waiting for him to slide in.

but he didn’t.

he wanted you to lick him clean, he wanted to see you do as he said, follow his orders like a good girl without complaints.

“clean the mess you’ve done. now.”

the harsh tone of his voice sent a wave of arousal straight to your core. your hands immediately shot up to grab a hold of his length, but before you got too close he stopped you. confusion was written all over your face and for a moment you worried he had changed his mind.

“no hands, i want you to work on it only with that dirty mouth of yours.”

with your hands gripping onto his thighs, your tongue swiped from the base to the head of his cock, eagerly licking him clean. once you had swallowed every drop of his cum, your mouth took him whole, hollowing your cheeks, one hand massaging his balls. donghyuck threw his head back as yours bobbed at a rapid pace, the tip of his cock reaching the back of your throat as you swallowed around him.

when he was about to cum, he pulled away from your mouth, making you whine at the loss. wrapping his hand once again around your throat like a beautiful necklace, he forced you up on your feet. he turned you around before pulling you closer by a rough tug. your clothed ass pressed against his dick, a mixture of his arousal and your saliva wetting the cloth. your hips ground back to both tease him, desperate to feel something, anything. his hands went to the front of your jeans, rubbing his fingers over your clothed clit and a whimper fell from your lips.

“more, i need more,” you pleaded, the barrier of clothes making the feeling less pleasurable.

he surprisingly complied without resistance, dipping the digits under the restricting cloth. a deep groan vibrated against the side of your neck when he felt the wetness that had been gathering inside your panties since your dare.

“look at you, so damn wet,” his mouth watered at the feeling of your needy heat. at this point, donghyuck knew everyone had an idea of what you two could possibly be doing, and although he would enjoy returning the favour by eating you out to his heart’s content, there wasn’t enough space nor time to do so comfortably. but he swore he would make it up to you some time.

“for who is it, baby?” the answer was obvious, but still, he wanted to hear it directly from you. he inserted one long finger until it was knuckles deep inside of you and you let out a squeak, head falling back onto his shoulder.

“for you donghyuck, all for you.”

“that’s right, slut, only i can make you that wet, only i can touch you like this. you’re mine, don’t forget that,” he inserted a second finger and pumped them deeply into you.

“yes,” you breathed out softly, too far gone to fight back with a snarky remark.

although his fingers felt good and you could possibly –with a bit of an effort– cum just from them, you still wanted more. you wanted to feel the nice stretch of his cock tearing your walls apart.

“please, donghyuck.”

“what do you want?”

donghyuck knew what you wanted. fuck, he wanted it too, so bad. he had been waiting for an opportunity like this for a long time and now that he could finally have it, he was going to make the best out of it.

“fuck me,” your core ached to be filled so you swallowed your pride and spoke out.

“condom?”

“we don’t need it, i’m on the pill,” you rushed, stomach twisting and turning in excitement, “please, just fuck me.”

donghyuck’s eyes turned darker, lust clouding both of your minds with the only desire to fuck each other stupid. he pulled down your jeans so they were pooling on your ankles and went back to pump his fingers inside you to make sure you were ready to take him. as he entered you, you had to lean on the sink in front of you to hold yourself up or else you would have faceplanted the mirror.

“you feel so good, fuck, so fucking tight,” donghyuck growled when he was balls deep in you.

whimpers fell from your lips from the delicious stretch of his thick cock. after a few seconds of you adjusting to his size, you backed your ass into his hips to let him know you wanted him to move. he gave a couple of thrusts to test the waters before picking up his pace and you gripped the sides of the sink as he pounded into you. his mouth worked on your neck while you brought one of his hands under your shirt to play with your breasts.

“such a pretty sight, don’t you think?” he tugged harshly at your hair to force you to look at your reflection on the mirror, thrusts never faltering.

your makeup was ruined; lipstick smeared messily all over your lips from the hot make-out session, neck full of bruises donghyuck left to claim you, shirt pulled above your breasts displaying your puckered nipples while one of his big hands grabbed your boob as they bounced with every hard snap of his hips.

“you have no idea how many times i had to control myself not to pounce on you,” his eyes never left your quivering reflection, completely in love with the way your frame molded with his, “every single time you couldn’t keep that pretty little mouth of yours closed and all i wanted to do was shut you up with my cock.”

“f-fuck,” his thrusts turned rougher as his free hand wrapped around your neck, tightening his grip and amplifying the mind-blowing sensations he was giving you.

your asscheeks slapped against his hips, which drilled against you at an unhuman pace, hitting the right spots with every snap and making your eyes roll to the back of your head. you couldn’t keep your mouth shut, loud moans threatening to fall from your lips so you slapped your palm over your mouth to muffle your sounds.

“don’t, i want to hear you,” he gave a particularly hard thrust to try and draw a sound out of you, “i want you to be so loud that all of our friends know what we’re doing, i want them to know how good i’m making you feel.”

specially mark.

but he wasn’t going to tell you that.

“h-hyuck,” you couldn’t hold back the broken moan that fell from your lips, pleasure overtaking your body. your hands gave in and you almost fell forward, but donghyuck reacted sooner and pulled you by your hair, holding you up.

“address me properly, brat,” he growled in your ear. you felt a hard slap on your ass, the skin of the abused area stinging from the impact.

“i’m sorry… fuck, donghyuck,” your cries went straight to his dick, urging him to fuck you harder. he kneaded the flesh soothingly before spanking it again and again until you could make out the imprint of his big hand on your asscheek.

“f-faster, please,” you pleaded in a whine and he tsked, shaking his head, “such a greedy little slut.”

“what would everyone think of you if they could see you so eagerly taking my cock, mm?” donghyuck hummed, “begging for me to fuck you until you can’t walk properly?

shocks of pleasure shot through you, his dirty talk helping you reach your release faster than you anticipated. his grip on you was so tight you were sure you were going to be sore the next day. your moans turned pornographic as you neared your release, your walls squeezed around donghyuck to the point he was unable to move, so he started drawing circles over your sensitive clit to help you get off.

“let go, baby.”

and soon, his touch threw you over the edge, causing your body to shake and a broken moan to fall from your lips, legs weak as your whole weight only relied on your arms for support. he followed shortly after, grunting as he filled you up with his warm and sticky essence.

as he pulled out, a mixture of your slick juices and his seed leaked from your abused hole, dripping down your inner thighs. his fingers slid over to gather the drops of cum and opposite to your assumption, he didn’t push it back inside of you but brought the digits to your face, waiting for you to open your mouth.

“suck.”

and you did, eyes locked with his through the mirror as your tongue swirled around his fingers to lick them clean.

“fuck,” donghyuck sighed, “i didn’t know you were so dirty, sweetheart.”

and the teasing comes back.

“do you want me to remind you how i made you cum in your pants back there in a room full of people?” you rolled your eyes in disbelief and he just let out a breathy laugh.

“whatever. either way, even if they didn’t have the pleasure of fucking you or at least seeing you get fucked, they surely could hear you from how loud you were screaming my name.”

“good thing mark now knows who you belong to,” the words slipped out of his mouth before he could think and both of you shared a look of pure shock.

“did you just mention mark?”

“…no?”

“you did! what the fuck? were you jealous of mark?” you asked, eyes wide as you remembered the disgusted look on his face when you and mark got too touchy with each other during the game.

“i am jealous of mark.”

“what? why?”

“oh my god, you’re so dense.”

“shut up, i’m not.”

“yes, you are. i like you dumbass, that’s fucking why. why wouldn’t i be jealous if you two act like you’re dating but always deny it when questioned? i can give you my hoodies, i can cuddle you and hold your hand, i can spoil you with cute stuff. i can be your boyfriend, it doesn’t have to be him.”

everything was so weird.

you were supposed to be enemies for fucks sake.

but he looked cute with pouty lips.

“well, you sure have got a damn weird way of demonstrating it.”

“shut up, okay?” donghyuck snapped, done with trying to get you to shut the fuck up. “i just didn’t know how to approach you or talk to you at all, alright?” he sighed, a scowl forming on his face. “you always seem to be angry when i’m around.” the change in his voice shocked you, it was much softer now, as if he was afraid of you hearing it.

“hey, don’t beat yourself for it, alright?” you sighed, feeling bad for being so mean to him for no reason. because you really didn’t have a reason. whenever you weren’t at each other’s throats and you got time to observe him from afar, you saw how caring he was with his friends, even if most of the time he annoyed the crap out of them.

donghyuck actually seemed like a good guy… if you ignored his teasing.

maybe you didn’t hate him as much as you thought.

“so, would you be my-,”

suddenly, the sound of banging on the door resonated through the room.

“are you done already? i need to pee.”

you quickly fixed your clothes, embarrassed by the presence of someone outside the door waiting for you and donghyuck to get out and momentarily forgetting about the boy’s proposal. just as you were about to open the door and get yourself the fuck out of the situation, his arms wrapped around your waist to pull you closer and whisper to your ear in a way you could feel your panties get damp once again.

“we’re not done yet, princess.”

–lia:)

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝙸𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟸 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟷 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟹

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟸 : 𝚠𝚊𝚕𝚔 𝚘𝚏 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚖𝚎

“Good morning,” Donghuck smirks. “have fun last night?”  

You sit silently seething with rage, looking away from him, trying to figure out what really happened while you were drunk. 

“Why are you being so quiet now?” he asks with that smirk still plastered on his face. “I mean, you were screaming all last night.”

“What the hell did you do to me?” You snap.

“What? You were begging me for it,” Donghyuck laughs. “Don’t you remember, baby?” He reaches up and gently caresses your cheek. You instantly smack his hand away and without thinking you attempt to smack his face. “You asshole,” you scream, fighting back tears.

Donghyuck grabs both of your wrists, pinning them down above your head, “does this feel familiar?” he asks with his classic shit eating grin on his face. “Or do you need me to refresh your memory?”

That comment crosses the line, he went too far. You now remember everything you despise in that man. “You asshole,” you yell as you struggle to break free from his grip. Donghyuck couldn’t help but laugh, amused by your reaction. He releases your wrists assuming you sustained enough embarrassment for one day. You quickly hop out of bed, realizing you were still completely naked.

“I don’t mind looking at you like this,” Donghyuck winks.

His words were disgusting but you couldn't think of a comeback for something so foul. You grab your clothing, quickly dressing before running out of his room with your shoes still in your hand. You slam the door behind you as you exit, hoping it'll deter Donghyuck from following you but unfortunately, he does whatever he wants and is closely behind. 

You spot a younger man that you don’t recognize sitting alone in the garage, eating what appears to be cereal. Although it doesn’t make a difference to you who he is or what he hears, all you know is you need to get as far away from the asshole as possible. 

“Get me two bowls for cereal,” Donghyuck orders as you feel him grab your wrist from behind, stopping you in your tracks and forcing you to face him. “Where the hell are you going?”

“It’s none of your business,” you snap, not wanting to look at him. You harshly pull your arm away, attempting to walk away.

“Hey, I’m talking to you nicely here,” he huffs, quickly grabbing your arm again.

“And why are you all of a sudden being nice?” you ask, starting to get angrier. Angry isn't the best word to describe what you are feeling but it's close enough. “Why? Trying to be my knight in shining armor? Huh? Who the hell offers breakfast after a night like that?” You pull your arm away from his grip once again.

Donghyuck, becoming irritable, looks around searching for the right words. “No, I’m not trying to be a fucking hero. I just need you to understand that I will kill you if you tell anybody about what happened.”

‘The nerve of this man’ you thought. Who does he actually think he is?

“Don’t you worry,” you say before thinking it through. “An embarrassing night like that…I wouldn’t dream of reliving it by telling anyone.”

You turn and walk away leaving Donghyuck behind lost for words. No one ever talks to him that way, he can't believe that you have the balls to do it, and so eagerly as well. You walk down the street attempting to order an Uber.

When you finally get home to the safety of your dorm, you want to kiss the floor. You had never been so happy to be at home. You immediately undress, turning on the shower. You step inside your shower hoping to erase all of the memories of your drunken mistake. You feel disgusting by both your choices and actions. How could you have made such poor decisions? How could you allow yourself to get so drunk that you didn’t even know you were with the man you hated the most? It wasn’t Jisung, it was Donghyuck the whole night and this was something you now have to live with from here on out. You're finding it difficult to handle the emotions any longer and the floodgates begin to open up. Tears start to stream down your face and you fall to the floor of the shower, the hot water burning your skin as you sulk in your self-loathing. Once the water gets cold, you turn off the shower, dry your tears, and attempt to pull yourself together. You throw on some lounging clothing and lay down on your sofa. You know you should attend class but must avoid Donghyuck at all costs.

You look down at your phone, debating on whether you should call your mom when you hear people talking. Their voices are so clear that you wonder if people are on your balcony.

“Oh come on Yeji, I’m so sorry.”

That voice sounds so familiar. But it's not possible, it just can't be him.

“Please don’t be mad at me. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”

You slowly sit up. That’s Donghyuck’s voice. But why is he on your balcony? You creep outside, noticing Donghyuck and some girl on the balcony next to yours.

“And how are you planning on making it up to me exactly?” Yeji asks, with a smile on her face. You can tell she was enjoying teasing him, which makes you feel something that you cannot explain.

“I’ll do whatever you tell me to,” he smiles back.

You lean over the railing trying to act natural, but you can't deny that you want to see what's happening.

“Oh I’m so sorry,” the girl says while looking at you. “I didn’t know you were fully moved in or we wouldn’t have been so loud.”

You are caught off guard and don't know how to respond. You want to play it cool and not show the wrong emotions or act suspiciously.

“It’s ok, she’s the one who well…” Donghyuck says getting closer to the girl and whispers. You can't hear what's said which makes you uncomfortable.

The girl smiles politely, “Well I’m Yeji. I’m so glad I finally get to meet my new neighbor.”

You smirk, knowing Donghyuck must be worried about how this is going to play out. That alone brings you joy. “I’m Y/N. I didn’t realize that Donghyuck would be able to get a girl like you.”

He wraps his arm around his girlfriend’s shoulder, “You always do this, Y/N... you go after men who are already taken.”

You take an exaggerated breath before speaking, “I wish the best to you two,” you smile before walking back inside of your apartment. The smile instantly drops from your face, once inside.

You plop back down on the sofa, dozing off to sleep in no time. You wake to the sound of your phone going off, after seeing that it's your best friend calling, you silence the call and continue to lay in silence. You aren’t ready to confess anything to your friends, if you say it out loud there is no more denying the truth.

After a full day of self-loathing, you decide to get up. You have to try to distract yourself from everything bad in your life. You get dressed and head over to the university pool to get some much needed exercise.

You are hoping to have the pool to yourself. Most students are either studying or drinking by this time of the day. But as soon as you walk out of the locker room you realize your expectation is shortly lived.

“I can do it myself,” Jisung whines. Even though he rejected you, you still can't shake your feelings. You still want him and you still want him to love you.

“Don’t be so stubborn,” Karina says. “I want to do it for you.”

“I’m not a baby, Karina,” Jisung insists.

“I didn’t say you are,” she snaps. “Now give me your arm.”

“Fine,” Jisung hesitantly agrees, putting his arm out for Karina to wrap with an ace bandage.

You walk towards them, listening to their little exchange, suffering in silence.

“See, it’s so much better when you let someone else do the wrapping. It gets tighter,” Karina explained, looking at Jisung with so much love in her eyes. 

“Thank you,” Jisung smiles. “You always take such good care of me.”

“That’s only because you take such good care of me,” Karina giggles, placing her hand on his leg.

You watch as the jealousy continues to grow. You can't stop thinking about that night.

“Because the only person I have feelings for is Karina,” Jisung stated.

You feel the tears welling up again and you have to look away. This is too painful. You sit on the pool's edge and slowly lower your body into the water wanting to wash away the memories. All the little moments you shared with Jisung running through your mind. It hurts so much, you want to forget it all.

Donghyuck spends the evening attempting to show his girlfriend how sorry he is for standing her up the other night. He feels guilty for a multitude of reasons but is only able to express the guilt for abandoning his beloved girlfriend.  They end their evening inside her dorm room. Yeji is busy doing her nighttime routine as Donghyuck sits alone on her bed, patiently waiting. His phone goes off, signaling he received a text from his friend, Jaemin.

JAEMIN: Don't forget tomorrow is Jisungs birthday. You can’t bail on us

Donghyuck exhales out of frustration before setting his phone down on the bed next to him. He looks at his girlfriend, almost afraid to tell her of his prior engagement. 

“I had so much fun with you tonight, muffin,” Donghyuck smiles, trying to ease into the bad news.

“Me too,” Yeji returns the smile. “Dinner was delicious.”

“It really was,” he nods. “So...tomorrow is Jisung’s birthday.”

The smile drops from Yeji's face as she turns around in her chair to look at him. “Ok and?”

“Well, I’m going to take Jisung out for his birthday with the boys. We gotta do something special for him this year but you can come with, if you want,” Donghyuck explains.

“No, that’s ok,” Yeji sighs. “I have a project that I need to work on with Yuna anyway so I’ll just go over to her place. You have fun.”

“Do you want help?” he offers, displaying a goofy smile.

Yeji laughs, “I want to do well on the assignment so it would probably be best if you didn’t help.”

“Hey,” Donghyuck grins. “I’m doing a lot better in school these days.”

“Yea I know, but it’s your friend’s birthday, you don’t want to be tied down with your girlfriend and miss it,” Yeji insists.

“Ok fine, how about this,” Donghyuck starts. “Tomorrow night, I won’t stay out long. Then, we can meet back here for a little cuddle time.”

Yeji smiles widely, nodding her head in response. She stands and walks over to her bed, sitting down next to her boyfriend. “I’m really tired, I think I’m ready to go to bed.”

Donghyuck smirks, pulling the covers down ready to climb inside the bed, “yea me too,” he says eagerly.

“Nooooo,” Yeji state. “You know you can’t sleep in my bed. We’ve talked about this.”

“But baby, we’ve been together for over a year now…”

“Are you saying that I’m not worth waiting for?” Yeji asks.

“Of course you're worth the wait but how much longer are you going to make me wait?” Donghyuck whines.

“I don’t have an answer for that,” Yeji sighs, lightly pushing him off her bed so she could sleep alone.

Donghyuck leans down and kisses her forehead before crawling on the sofa and attempting to get some sleep.

Emotions are a bitch, and currently you are dealing with an infinite amount of them. The heartbreak alone would be hard enough but now you added self-pity, loathing, and shame to the slew. 

You walk around the university grounds aimlessly, simply looking for a distraction of sorts. You end up standing on the bridge of hope, looking down at the water below. You stare down fixated on the currents and how peaceful the scene is. You move closer to the edge…

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟹 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟸 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟺

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟹 : 𝚒𝚛𝚘𝚗 𝚖𝚊𝚗

You stand on the edge of the bridge, fixated on the water below as thoughts and memories flood through your mind. You lift your right foot, appearing like you're about to jump off of the bridge.

“Hey hey,” you hear a voice yell from behind you. “Hold on, Y/N.”

You are instantly pulled out of the trance by the familiar voice. You turn to see Donghyuck getting off his motorcycle and walking towards you. However, the sight of him still makes your skin crawl.

“What the fuck are you doing,” he yells. “Why would you try to kill yourself because you were rejected?”

What did he just say? How dare he think so poorly of you? You hop off of the bridge’s wall and turn to look at him with anger written all over your face.

“I know about everything that happened with Jisung,” he continues. “You were planning on jumping, weren’t you?”

“Are you nuts? I wouldn’t do anything like that,” you snap, clearly irritated.

Donghyuck looks around, biting his lip out of pure frustration. “So what were you doing, exactly?” he asks.

You didn’t answer him, you didn’t owe him any explanation at all. He is nothing to you, not even a friend so why should you open up and expose your most vulnerable thoughts and feelings.

“Answer me, damn it,” Donghyuck demands. “Why were you standing on the ledge, if you weren’t planning on jumping?”

You turn to walk away, still refusing to answer his inquiries. You feel a hand grab your arm pulling you backwards.

“Could you please just talk to me?” Donghyuck pleads.

“I was just thinking, that’s all,” you blurt out. “I wasn’t going to jump, I was just looking at how beautiful the water is.”

“Just thinking, huh?” Donghyuck repeats in disbelief.

“Look, as long as Jisung doesn’t ask Karina out and make things official, I still have a chance,” you state.

“You seriously believe that?” he huffs.

“Someone like you couldn’t possibly understand what I’m going through,” you snap. “When you love someone, you are willing to do whatever you have to, to get them.”

“You’re right, I don’t understand…” Donghyuck says, staring at you thoughtfully for a few seconds before continuing. “Why can’t you just leave my friend alone?”

“I don’t understand either,” you admit. You were never like this with anyone before but there was something different with Jisung. He was special and you just couldn’t let those feelings go. “Why can’t you leave me alone?”

“Ok fine. I’ll leave you alone,” Donghyuck huffs. “But I'll tell you one thing. I’m not sure if you’re aware but you are at least five miles from your dorm…enjoy your walk home.”

You watch as he climbs back onto his motorcycle, getting ready to drive off. You look at the empty seat on the back of his bike, contemplating asking for a ride but not wanting to ask the man you hate so much for help. 

“In your dreams,” Donghyuck smirks as if he's able to read your mind.

“It’s fine, I can walk,” you huff. “I did walk here after all.”

You turn and start walking in the opposite direction of where the university and dorms are actually located.

“You’re going the wrong way, genius,” he adds with his classic smirk back on his face.

You huff before turning around, glaring at Donghyuck as you storm past him. The sun was setting and everything was starting to get dark. Soon the only light available would be the few street lights along the way. Donghyuck knows it wouldn’t be completely safe for a woman to walk alone on the back roads to get to the university. He exhaled slowly already knowing what he had to do. He fires his bike up and pulls over next to you.

“Hey,” he says.

“What?” you snap, annoyed, thinking he was just going to say something else cocky.

“Hop on,” he orders. “Don’t get it confused though, I’m not doing this because I like you, it’s only because I don’t want your death on my conscience if something happens to you.”

You hesitate but ultimately hop onto the back of the boy’s bike. He removes his helmet and hands it to you which you reluctantly take. After you are completely settled on the back of his motorcycle, he slowly turns the bike around and drives in the direction that you were originally walking. 

“You said this was the wrong direction,” you yell, confused.

“I have to make a stop first,” he declares. 

“Just let me off, I don’t have time for this shit,” you snap, knowing there was really nothing you could do if he doesn't listen.

“I’m going to the mall to buy a gift for Jisung. I figured you would probably need something too,” Donghyuck explains, speeding up on the bike causing you to grab onto his waist from behind. When he feels your hands grab onto his stomach, he glances at your tiny, delicate hands and a small smile grows on his face. When he notices his unintentional reaction, he immediately forces the smile away, shaking his head in a bit of disappointment in himself.

You didn’t want to go with Donghyuck anywhere but this was for Jisung. You were planning on getting him a birthday present but got distracted with your own emotions and feelings. You didn’t feel the need to respond, you just accepted his offer and rode the rest of the trip in silence.

Donghyuck pulls his motorcycle into a parking spot in front of the local mall. He quickly hops off, walking towards the entrance, you trailing behind. You happily walk through the mall, browsing at the different stores forgetting that Donghyuck was there. You wander aimlessly through the stores looking for that perfect gift. Your eyes get wide when you finally spot it. You rush into the store, practically running over to the shelf.

“You did your homework,” Donghyuck announces, walking up behind you. “Jisung loves Iron Man.”

You don’t respond, you didn’t have to. You know everything about Jisung, that is how it’s supposed to be when you are in love with someone. And you certainly didn’t feel any need to explain such things to a buffoon like him. You grab the box with the Iron Man figure inside and walk over to the cashier, without looking at the price.

You pull your wallet out of your bag, sighing when you realize you don’t have enough money. And since you forgot your phone in your room, you couldn’t even use your apple pay. Once again this is fate just slapping you in the face. You feel the urge to cry but don’t want to give Donghyuck the pleasure of seeing you show any signs of vulnerability.

Donghyuck hands the cashier his credit card to complete the order. The cashier places the gift in a plastic bag, handing it to you with a friendly smile on her face.

“Thank you so much,” you sang, surprised by his sudden expression of niceness. 

He reaches down, swiftly grabbing the bag from you, “what are you talking about? This is mine.” he announces, turning to exit the store.

“Are you kidding me?” you snapp, once again full of rage but decide to follow after the boy.

Donghyuck stops walking, turning to look at you. “How bad do you want this?” he asks with a smirk on his face.

You hesitate but you can’t deny the fact that you want that iron man figurine for your love. And you need to be the one to give it to him.

“I’ll do whatever you want,” you sigh.

“Ok from now on, you address me with complete respect…no more nasty remarks or attitude,” Donghyuck orders, holding the bag up in front of your face.

“No way,” you argue.

Donghyuck lowers the bag nodding with a smile, “ok then find yourself a new gift.” 

He turns to continue walking again, leaving you behind to weigh your options. You know what you had to do no matter how much it made your skin crawl.

“Donghyuck, sir,” you blurt out, causing him to turn to look at you. The shit eating grin on his face make the words even harder to get out. “Can I please have that Iron man?”

“What was that?” Donghyuck smiles, adjusting his shirt. “I don’t think I heard you.”

You take a few deep breaths trying to calm down so you can sound pleasant and kind while speaking. You have to do whatever it takes for Jisung.

“Sir, can I please have that Iron man?” you repeat.

Donghyuck looks down at the bag he is holding, then back at you with a huge smile on his face. “Of course, Y/N,” he smiles widely, walking towards you.

Donghyuck drops you off at the entrance of your dorm building, you go inside without thanking him. You need to get as far away from that man as you can. You walk inside and proceede to get ready and head back out for the bar where you are sure everyone would be gathering to celebrate Jisung’s birthday. You walk inside, tightly gripping onto the Iron Man figurine that you know he is going to love. Donghyuck smiles when he sees you enter the bar, he didn’t sure why he smiled, but it happened subconsciously.

Karina clinks her wine glass with a metal spoon to get everyone’s attention.

“I just need to say something for everyone to hear,” she announces, standing up. “There is someone really special to me here. I hope he knows who is and I hope that one day soon we can make things official.”

The room bursts out into excited cheers. Donghyuck smiles until he remembers that you were there. He turns to look at you as the smile drops, witnessing the hurt written all over your face. You run out of the bar, not wanting to break down in front of everyone. He doesn’t know why but he chases after you.

“Hey wait up, Y/N,” he calls, grabbing your arm to stop you from running away.

“Are you happy now?” you snap.

“What?” he asks, confused.

“You got what the hell you wanted,” you growl knowing he only chased after you to boast.

“Listen to me…” he starts.

“Just stop fucking talking,” you snap. “From now on, I will leave Jisung alone. Happy?”

He dosen’t know how to respond and you don’t really care to hear what he has to say. You storm away before Donghyuck could have the chance to make you feel any worse than you already do. He feels awful but didn’t understand why he felt that way. He ultimately did get what he wants but it didn't bring him any sort of joy. He goes back inside and says goodbye to all of his friends and makes his way over to Yeji’s. When he walks inside, she was laying in her bed, smiling at her phone, quickly putting it down and sliding it under the covers when she sees him.

“Hyuckie, why are you here so early?” Yeji asks, sitting up, quickly. “I thought you weren’t going to be here till late.”

“I told you I was going to come after we celebrated Jisung’s birthday, I just wanted to come a little earlier so we could have more time to cuddle,” he explains, making Yeji smile. “Do you know if your neighbor is home?”

“I don't know,” she sighs. “Why do you care?”

“It’s nothing important,” Donghyuck states. “I’m gonna get a shower quickly, then my attention will be completely on you.”

Yeji nods and when he turns around she immediately grabs her phone, instantly smiling at the text she received.

“Y/N,” someone was yelling in the hallway, getting Donghyuck’s attention. 

He opens the front door, seeing two guys banging on your dorm room’s door.

“Y/N, ARE YOU IN THERE?” YangYang yells.

“Can you just open the door?” Doyoung asks.

“Y/N,” YangYang repeats.

“What’s going on?” Donghyuck asks, walking towards them and closing the door behind him.

“Oh hey Donghyuck,” YangYang sighs. “It’s Y/N, she hasn’t been to any of her classes today and I haven’t been able to reach her at all so I wanted to see if she was home and ok.”

“I heard Karina announced to everyone that she wanted to make things official and I was worried that Y/N would do something crazy,” Doyoung adds.

“No, I don’t think so,” Donghyuck denies, slightly worried.

“You don’t know her,” YangYang snaps. “When Jisung made the first move on Karina, Y/N took a handful of sleeping pills…”

Donghyuck was overtaken with concern, he pushes the other two boys away from the door and starts banging while calling out your name. After a few seconds of getting no response, he uses his shoulder to break the door open, rushing inside, searching your dorm in a state of panic. 

“Y/N’s not here,” YangYang announces. “What do we do now?”

Doyoung pulls his phone out of his pocket, calling his friend.

“Hello, did you find her?” he asks. “Ok thank you.” He disconnects the call and places it back into his pocket.

“What’s going on?” Yangyang asks.

“Someone said they saw Y/N by the big bridge,” Doyoung explains.

“Son of a bitch,” Donghyuck expresses, running out of the room.

He drives his motorcycle to the bridge where he saw you earlier in the day. He searches the area but after finding no signs of you being there he was unsure of what to do. He removes his phone from his pocket noticing you shared a story on Insta. Donghyuck clicks on your story seeing a picture of a rooftop that he recognizes with a broken heart emoji.

“Damn it, Y/N,” he grunts before hopping back onto his bike and heading to the rooftop where he was certain you would be.

After racing onto the rooftop, he freezes in his spot at the sight in front of him.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟺 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟹 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟻

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟺 : 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚐𝚒𝚏𝚝

Donghyuck races to the rooftop where he is certain you will be. When he breaks through the doors, he freezes at what he sees.

He runs over, pulling your arm, disrupting your current make-out session with a man that Donghyuck doesn’t recognize.

“What the hell are you doing?” he yells.

You stand there, shocked by his presence, rubbing your head before speaking.

“What the fuck,” you finally end up muttering in response.

Donghyuck looks at the other man and orders, “leave…I need to talk to her.”

The man ignores his demands and continues to watch on.

“Why the hell don’t you answer your phone?” Donghyuck snaps before looking back at the other man. “I said LEAVE! Get the fuck out of here.”

The man looks at you, shaking his head, sighing heavily before exiting the rooftop, leaving you alone with Donghyuck.

“Do you have any idea how many people were worried about you?” Donghyuck stresses.

“Worried about me?” you repeat, briefly rubbing your head. “It’s none of your damn business. Aren’t you just happy to see me like this? Isn’t this what you fucking wanted?”

Donghyuck looks around, angry at himself for being in this situation. “For your information, I never wanted you to get heartbroken. I only wanted you to move on from Jisung so you would be able to find someone that could make you happy and love you back.”

You stare at him for a few moments, surprised by the words that are coming out of his mouth. Although, you aren't sure how to process them, they honestly make you even more confused.

“I don’t know why I want that for you, I really don’t,” Donghyuck confesses. 

“You’re just such an amazing guy,” you snap, with more sarcasm in your voice than you intend. “You want me to be happy? I’d be a fucking idiot to believe bullshit like that. You just don’t want something to happen to me because you don’t want Jisung to feel guilty. YOU NEVER ACTUALLY WORRIED ABOUT ME! You’re just…”

Donghyuck watches as you are having your breakdown. Without thinking he grabs your shoulders, pulling you closer to him. He leans in, pressing his lips against yours.

He quickly pulls away, “Why?” he yells. “I have gone further with you than I have with Yeji.” He grabs your head, pulling you in and firmly pressing his lips against yours again.

You instinctively kiss him back for a few seconds before pushing him away.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” you yell, wiping your mouth with your arm. “I HATE YOU!”

You say those words with such passion and rage that there is no denying how serious you are. You turn and storm off of the roof leaving Donghyuck behind, regretting his life choices alone.

The next few days you run through the movements robotically. It feels as though you were seeing Karina and Jisung everywhere and it drives you nuts. You still don’t want them to be together but you know that you have no chance anymore. You have to accept the situation as it is, no matter how hard it is going to be.

You see Karina alone in the library. She is never alone anymore, she always has jisung by her side. You think that this will be your only chance. You walk over to her, seething with jealousy and rage.

Karina turns around pausing when she sees you standing behind her. “Jisung isn’t here,” she sighs.

“Here,” you say, handing a bag to her. “This is his birthday gift. Can you give it to him?”

“Why are you giving it to me?” she asks.

“Because you two are official now. I’m done meddling between the two of you,” you explain. You don’t want to admit your defeat but you knew it was the right thing to do.

Karina smiles, widely, “Really, Y/N?”

“Yea,” you nod, looking down at the ground not wanting to make eye contact out of pure shame.

“You really moved on this quickly?” she questions.

“Not yet but I’m going to try,” you sigh, turning to walk away. You can’t continue the pleasantries any longer and you don’t want to slip up and say something nasty.

As you are walking away you notice Jisung walking towards his girlfriend out of the corner of your eye, but you force yourself to not look.

“What’s that?” Jisung asks, pointing to the bag that you gave Karina.

“It's the last gift from your number one fan,” she smiles, handing him the plastic bag, unaware of the contents inside.

Jisung removes the Iron Man figurine from the plastic bag, staring at it for a few moments before smiling at Karina and walking to go back to where his friends are sitting. He places the figurine on the table before sitting back down.

“What’s with Iron Man?” Jaemin asks.

“It’s my birthday gift,” Jisung announces, forcing Donghyuck to look up from the book he is currently reading. He peeks up then looks back at his book but instantly focuses back on the box in front of his friend. A look of disgust on his face.

Mark turns around, “I have the sudden urge to boo you,” he announces.

“Ready?” Chenle eggs on.

“Hit it,” Jaemin continues, pretending to shift a car into gear with one hand and pretending the other is on the steering wheel.

“Boooooooo,” Mark laughs at his friends.

“What’s wrong with you?” Chenle asks, looking at Jisung.

“Stop fooling around,” Jeno interrupts, trying to be the mature one.

“I’m sorry,” Mark sighs while bowing his head, politely.

“Jisung, did your hot doctor give you that?” Chenle asks, bluntly.

“No, it’s not from Karina,” Jisung states.

“Then from who?” Mark wonders.

“You just got your big present from your sexy doctor yesterday,” Jeno interjects with a huge smile on his face.

“But, is she enough for you, Jisung?” Chenle teases.

Donghyuck slams his book on the table before storming out of the library.

“Hyuck,” everyone says before he is out of sight.

“What the hell's wrong with him?” Mark snaps.

Jisung watches his best friend leave without saying a word but this isn’t a normal reaction for the Donghyuck he knows and loves.

At the pool, you are stretching on the side before getting into the water. You have your normal routine before you start swimming and stretching was the last step.

You feel a large hand grab your arm, forcefully spinning you around.

“You lied to me,” Donghyuck hisses.

“What the hell are you talking about?” you ask, confused.

He looks around before speaking to make sure you two are alone. Deciding that the surroundings aren’t safe, he pulls you into the locker room to guarantee more privacy.

Although once inside, Donghyuck still doesn’t let go of your arm, which he is squeezing quite tightly.

“You’re hurting me,” you announce looking down at your arm.

“You said you would stop bothering my friend,” Donghyuck says, squeezing your arm even harder. “So why the hell did you give him that iron man? Huh?”

“You’re really hurting me,” you whine, finally getting his attention of what he was doing and it forces him to release his grip.

“I didn’t give it to him. I gave it to Karina to pass along to her boyfriend,” you explain while rubbing the arm that he was squeezing. “Plus I told her that I would stop meddling.”

“I just…” Donghyuck stops, searching for the correct words to use. “Worried…that you’d get hurt again.”

You stare into Donghyuck’s eyes for a few seconds before looking down at the arm that he squeezed. “Is this what people do when they’re worried?” you ask. “You yelled at me the minute you got here AND you didn’t even say you’re sorry for hurting me.”

You turn to walk out of the locker room, wanting to make a dramatic exit.

“SORRY,” Donghyuck yells, forcing you to stop walking and back up towards the boy.

“What did you say?” you ask. You knew what he said but you just wanted to hear him say it again.

“You heard me,” he sighs, not wanting to repeat it.

“I don’t think I did,” you insist.

Donghyuck thinks for a second, staring into your eyes. “I’m sorry.”

You look at him with a little smirk on your face, “I’m still not hearing you.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeats, in a meak tone.

“What was that?” you ask again, teasingly.

Donghyuck grabs the back of your head and pulls you close to him so he could whisper in your ear, “I am sorry.” He releases you and you pull away annoyed that he touched you again. “Are you happy?” 

You refuse to answer with words, you only smile which makes Donghyuck relieved, knowing what you are implying without using your words.

“Now that you have your answer,” you state. “I need to know something.”

“What?” he asks.

“About last night…”

Donghyuck is concerned about what you were going to ask, only because he isn’t sure if he is ready to be honest. Honest with himself more than anything. But before you have time to ask your question, Karina walks inside the locker room, eyeing the both of you up.

“Nevermind,” you sigh, exiting the locker room while you have the chance.

Donghyuck watches as you storm off, resisting the urge to chase after you.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟻 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟜 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟞

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟻 : 𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐'𝚜 𝚐𝚊𝚖𝚎

Once the evening hits, Donghyuck goes over to Yeji’s dorm, like he does most nights. It’s easier to sleep at her place when he has classes the next day since her dorm was so close to the university.

He walks inside and Yeji is sitting at her desk, working on a report.

“You’re back early,” she says, smiling widely. 

“I’m hungry, let’s go get something to eat,” donghyuck announces while he takes his shoes off and walks over to where she is sitting.

“But I’m tired of the restaurants around here, Hyuckie,” Yeji whines, pouting trying to get her way. “Where else can we go though?”

Donghyuck doesn’t respond, he stares at his feet as he continues to walk towards her, obviously deep in thought.

“Hyuck,” Yeji says, not getting a reaction from him. “DONGHYUCK!” she says, raising her voice to make sure it  snaps him out of the trance.

Donghyuck looks up, surprised.

“Are you listening to me?” she asks.

“Of course I am,” he says, smiling as he starts to take his bag off of his shoulder.

“No you’re not,” Yeji argues, annoyed. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing baby. I’m just tired,” Donghyuck says, shaking his head. “You said you’re hungry?”

Yeji nods her head eagerly.

“Well let’s go get something to eat then,” he suggests.

She nods, getting up and following him outside of her dorm. They walk side by side to a local restaurant a block away from the dorm building. They get their food and walk around looking for an empty table.

“Where do you want to sit baby?” Donghyuck asks.

She scans the room, smiling when she notices you sitting alone at a table in the back of the restaurant. 

“Oooh it’s Y/N,” Yeji announces, excited. She runs over to your table, “hey Y/N. Are you alone?”

You’re in the process of putting a spoonful of food into your mouth when she interrupts your peaceful dinner. You look up, surprised, first at her then at him who is closely behind.

“Yea,” you say hesitantly.

“We can sit somewhere else,” Donghyuck suggests. “I think we might make her uncomfortable.” He starts to walk away to find a different table for them to eat at. Since he’s the one who is uncomfortable, you didn’t want to give him an easy out. 

“It's ok,” you say, causing Donghyuck to freeze in his tracks, turning to look at you. “You can sit with me.”

“See,” Yeji smiles at her boyfriend. “She’s so nice, unlike you.”

She sits down, leaving the seat across from you for Donghyuck to sit. You can’t seem to take your eyes off of him while he hesitantly sits down. 

“Thanks again,” Yeji says and you force a smile in return. “Why are you eating alone? Aren’t you seeing anyone?”

“I’m currently looking around,” you explain.

“Really?” Yeji questions. “It mustn’t be that hard, looking like you. Let me help you. I know a lot of guys that would be into you, Y/N.” She reaches into her bag, pulling out her phone, “let me take a picture of you. One Two Three.” You smile widely as she clicks the picture.

Donghyuck looks at his girlfriend, “Is that a new phone?” he asks. 

“Um yea,” Yeji nods as the smile dissipates from her face. “My old one broke. Didn’t I tell you about that?”

“I don’t know, maybe you mentioned it before,” Donghyuck sighs. 

Yeji happily scrolls through her phone while you and Donghyuck eat.

“Oooh,” Yeji exclaimes. “I just remembered that Yuna is stopping by my place to get the report I’ve been working on.”

“Uh huh,” he grunts.

“She’s at my place now,” she announces, picking up her bag. “Do you mind if I go back to my dorm? You can stay here and finish eating though.”

“I guess,” he sighs. “But I thought you were hungry, I can box your food up and bring it back to your room.”

“No you don’t have to,” Yeji states. “You can just eat my food and Y/N if you want any of it, help yourself.” She pushes the plate towards him, smiling, “I’ll see you later.”

Yeji runs off before he has time to respond. You’re silently judging their interaction. You can tell there was something off about everything that just happened but it’s not your place to say anything.

Donghyuck stares at you for a few seconds before speaking, “I’m sorry,” he states.

“What for?” you ask.

“Well…” 

“Stop acting like I’m your secret lover,” you snap. “We are nothing.”

“You’re right,” he slowly nods his head. “We’re nothing and yet we did what we did.”

You bite your lip out of frustration. “We were both drunk that night.  But, I’m sober now and you should be too. So clearly it will never happen again,” you snap.

You wait a moment for a response but after getting nothing, you stand, walking away from the table, leaving Donghyuck sitting alone.

💓🌸the next day🌸💓

 Donghyuck sits in a classroom with his friends, studying together. He starts to zone out, not paying attention to the conversation his friends are currently engaging in.  Jaemin notices the lack of attentiveness so he reaches out smacking the back of his friend’s head. 

“What the hell was that for?” Donghyuck whines.

“You should be paying attention to your friends, Hyuck,” Jaemin smirks.

“We’re talking about how Y/N really hasn't bothered Jisung much lately,” Soojin explains.

“That’s because he proclaimed his love for the sexy doctor, publicly,” Chenle chimes in.

“The last time I saw her she looked so bu bu bu bum,” Mark sings.

“I feel bad for her,” Jaemin announces. “Maybe I should take Y/N out and help her move on.”

“Are you for real?” Mark asks with judgment all over his face.

“Is she even your type, Jaemin?” Chenle wonders.

“What’s wrong with it? She’s really cute,” Jaemin confesses.

Jisung walks into the room, sitting down in between Jaemin and Donghyuck.

“Let’s go out for a little tonight,” Donghyuck interrupts, attempting to change the topic. “I’ll tell Jeno too.”

“What happened?” Jisung asks, placing his hand on Donghyuck’s shoulder. “You said that you need to be home early.”

“Come on,” Donghyuck whines. “Just go when I ask.

“When my lovely friend invites me,” Soojin smiles. “I can’t skip the opportunity.”

🌸💓Later that night🌸💓

The group of friends clink their glasses, cheering out in unison before chugging their first set of drinks.

Donghyuck takes a few sips then sets his glass on the table in front of him, “It’s too strong,” he grunts.

Soojin notices his strange behavior, observing him from across the table.

“Hyuck,” she says, “Is there something wrong with you? Did you and Yeji have a fight?”

“There’s nothing wrong,” he denies.

“I don’t believe you, your face is telling a different story,” Soojin argues.

“Hey is that Y/N?” Jaemin asks excitedly, looking in the direction of the door.

“What?” Donghyuck asks.

“Yea that’s Y/N and her friends,” Jaemin smiles, pointing to where you are standing. “Over there.”

Donghyuck smiles when he sees you, but instantly forces the smile away hoping no one notices.

“Soojin, go ask your little sorority sister and her friends to come sit with us,” Jaemin orders with a smirk on his face.

She smiles before calling out to you, “HEY Y/N!!!!”

You turn and wave, smiling when you realize she is calling you over. Your friends follow you to their table.

“Sit with us,” Soojin orders.

You frown when you see Donghyuck sitting at their table. “No, we don’t want to bother you guys.”

“It’s rude to reject uperclassmen’s invitations,” Soojin states, trying anything to get you to sit down.

“Come on, Y/N,” YangYang smiles, “let’s just sit with them.”

“Ok,” you sigh, sitting down in the seat next to Soojin.

Jaemin signals to the waitress, who quickly brings you and your friends a round of drinks. 

“Come on guys, let's cheer,” Jeno orders.

Everyone raises their glasses, clinking them together before chugging them.

“Ok, let’s play a game,” Jeno suggests, pulling out a deck of cards from his pocket.

“Ooooh I know a game,” Soojin announces, snatching the deck of cards. “It’s called the King's game.” She shuffles the deck and passes everyone a card. “Now who got the King card?” 

“Me,” Jeno says, raising his hand.

“You can order whoever to do whatever,” she explains.

Jeno looks around at everyone at the table, finally pointing at Doyoung. “Chug your drink,” he orders.

Doyoung picks his glass up, and chugs the rest of the beer left inside his glass, slamming the now empty glass back down onto the table.

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Kun states, smiling at his friend.

Soojin passes out another round of cards.

“Wow, I got a good card,” Chenle boasts, sitting back in his chair.  Everyone picks their cards up, to look to examine their cards.

“YES,” Soojin exclaims. “I get to be the King this round.”

“Awww you’re gonna ask for some sick shit,” Jaemin whines.

“I’m not like that,” she denies with a telling smile on her face. “Ok, I’m going to pick number ten.”

Everyone looks around at each other, “who has number ten?” Mark asks.

You raise your hand, “I do.”

“Ok great,” Soojin smiles, looking at Jaemin trying to guess his card. “I will order number ten to look in the eyes of…um…number eight.”

“Damn it,” Jaemin scoffs, throwing his card down onto the table. “I’m three.”

“Awww I got it wrong,” Soojin sulks. She lightly taps her hands on the table, impatiently. “Ok who’s number eight?”

Donghyuck lays his card face up onto the table, exposing he’s the owner of the eight card. “Me,” he sighs.

“Donghyuck is eight,” YangYang laughs, elbowing you in the side.

“It’s just a staring contest,” Soojin expresses. “And the loser has to finish one drink. Are you both ready? One. Two. Three.”

You lean forward in your chair, gazing into Donghyuck’s eyes. Donghyuck grows increasingly uncomfortable but he doesn't understand why. He thinks your eyes are beautiful so he should want to look into them. Although, memories that the two of you shared keep popping in and out of his mind.

“We were both drunk that night. It will never happen again.” he remembers you saying at the cafe.

“I hate you,” he envisions you yelling at him when he found you on the rooftop.

Donghyuck blinks his eyes out of discomfort, quickly looking away.

“Holy shit, Hyuck just lost,” Mark gasps.

“He lost to a girl,” Chenle laughs.

“That’s because Y/N is amazing,” Kun boasts, proudly.

Jaemin nudges Donghyuck’s arm, “you’re so lame,” he laughs.

“Drink,” Soojin orders. “The loser has to drink.”

“Oh yea,” Donghyuck nods, picking up his glass and downing the rest of his beer.

The night goes on, playing a few more rounds until everyone is ready to leave. You follow the crew outside, your friends are too drunk to drive so they get rides with some of the older students.

You are walking towards your car, in between Jaemin and Donghyuck, fully aware that you probably shouldn’t drive yourself home either.

“So how are you getting home, Y/N?” Jaemin asks, you shrug in response. “Want a ride?”

“She lives in the same building that I’m going to, I can just take her,” Donghyuck states.

“But you drive so fast,” Jaemin argues. “Come with me, it’ll be more comfortable.”

You look at Donghyuck then back at Jaemin, unsure who to choose. A part of you really wants to accept the ride from Donghyuck but you fight that urge back. 

“I’ll go with you, Jaemin,” you smile.

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Jaemin nods, proudly. He places his hand on your back, guiding you in the direction of his car. “Drive carefully man,” he smiles at his friend.

Jaemin walks ahead, leading you to his car. You stop walking, wanting to turn to look back at Donghyuck but stopping yourself. You were afraid that if you would look at him, you would change your mind and go with him. You shake your head, more so in disappointment in yourself than anything else, and continue to walk over to Jaemin’s car. Donghyuck watches on wanting to beg you to not go but not allowing himself to be weak or vulnerable in front of you again.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟼 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟻 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟽

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟼 : 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚐𝚒𝚛𝚕𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍

You walk into the university to meet your friends at the predetermined table to work on your group assignment.

“My head hurts so bad,” Kun complains.

“Where’s YangYang and Doyoung?” you ask, sitting down at the table.

“They’re submitting the first part of the report to the professor,” Hendery explains.

“Damn, I am so hungover,” Kun continues complaining. “I kept getting bottoms up orders all night.”

“Because you’re a loser,” Hendery laughs.

“You weren’t even there, asshole,” Kun snaps.

You start to zone out, thinking about Donghyuck and how you swore he was looking at you differently last night then he has previously. YangYang and Doyoung walk over to the table, sitting down and knocking you out of your deep thoughts. Your friends exchange little pleasantries which you somehow block out, getting lost in your thoughts about Donghyuck again.

“Y/N,” YangYang says with no response from you. “Hey Y/N,” he repeats, still not getting a reaction. “Y/N!!” he yells, finally startling you out of your little day dream.

“You’ve been daydreaming quite a lot lately,” Doyoung states. “Who’s it about?”

“Asshole,” you hiss.

“Professor said we have to rewrite our report,” Kun complains, looking at the papers in front of him. “But I don’t know what part needs to be rewritten.”

“And our deadline is this evening,” YangYang adds.

Donghyuck walks into the student area, where you and your friends are sitting, talking to Yeji on his phone.

“I’m sorry, I don’t think I can see you tonight,” Yeji states. “I have to do a report at Lia’s.”

“It’s ok, baby,” Donghyuck sighs. “Just focus on your schoolwork and I’ll see you soon.”

“You too, Hyuckie,” Yeji says before disconnecting the call.

Donghyuck shoves his phone in his pocket, scanning the student’s lounge, his eyes landing on you. You can feel someone looking at you, getting your attention and forcing you to look around. Your eyes lock with his which makes you feel a yearning that you don’t  expect. You don't welcome the feeling either.

Donghyuck exhales deeply before turning to walk away, resisting the temptation to talk to you. 

“Hey Donghyuck,” Kun yells. “Donghyuck please, come here.”

He contemplates walking away and pretending to not hear the calls but ultimately turns back around walking towards your table.

“What’s up,” he asks.

“Can you look at our report that we submitted? The professor said we have to rewrite it but none of us know which part needs to be rewritten,” Kun explains.

Donghyuck sits down in the only open seat next to you, quickly reviewing the report. You watch him as he focuses on the words written on the paper, noticing how his nose scrunches a little when he focuses. And how he bites his lip once he really starts to concentrate. You stop yourself. Why is this happening?

“I got it,” Donghyuck states, proudly. “You just got to change the unit. The result is not the same because you didn’t change the unit.”

“Oooooh,” Kun nods.

“Let me see,” Doyoung says, in disbelief. “Y/N, look at it. This is the part you did.”

You lean down to see your mistake.

“You did that part?” Donghyuck asks, looking at you. “This is so basic, you had to use it on the admission exam.”

And just like that, the fuzzy feelings you thought you were starting to feel towards Donghyuck, all disappear without a trace.

“This may be but you gotta remember she’s still heartbroken,” YangYang adds, trying to defend you. “She keeps daydreaming about Jisung.”

“You’re talking nonsense,” you snap.

“So you’re daydreaming,” Donghyuck interrupts. “About who?”

“It’s none of your concern,” you hiss. “It’d be nice if we could cut someone out of our life, like we cut paper.”

You say it to upset Donghyuck and by the look on his face it does seem to bother him a bit.

“Wow,” Doyoung laughs. 

“Soooo lame,” Hendery adds.

“How about this,” Donghyuck says, readjusting in his chair. “Can I borrow your heartbroken girl?”

“But she needs to rewrite our report,” Kun objects.

You know you can always count on Kun to get you out of things like this. There’s one thing he would never agree to and that’s him having to do more work than necessary.

“What if I tutor you all regularly?” Donghyuck offers.

You wait for Kun’s refusal, positive it’s coming. “Sure, you can take her,” Kun smiles. “We can handle rewriting it, this time.”

“But…” you start.

“It’s no problem at all,” Doyoung states.

“No but I wanna do it,” you insist.

“No, no, you’re free now so with Donghyuck…” Kun says, pulling the report away from you. “Thank you in advance for the tutoring.”

Donghyuck stands up, throwing his book bag over his shoulder, waiting for you to stand as well. When you don’t, he reaches down grabbing your hand to pull you up. You walk outside, with him guiding you with his hand on your upper back. Once you are out of sight of your friends, you stop to glare at him.

“What are you doing?” you ask.

“I’m going to take you to eat,” he smiles.

“Take your girlfriend, instead,” you grunt, exposing some jealousy.

“Yeji’s busy,” he sighs.

“Don’t you have friends?” you huff.

“So many damn questions,” Donghyuck grunts. “You’re coming because I said you are.”

He grabs your arm, pulling you away from the university. He leads you to a restaurant a few blocks away. You never been to the restaurant before and honestly you didn’t even know it existed. It looks like a dive and you don't feel comfortable eating at a place like that but you follow him to an empty table and sit down in the chair next to him.

“This is one of the best restaurants in town,” he explains. You scrunch your face in response. “Can you eat anything?”

“Of course, why couldn’t I?” you ask, causing him to smile.

The waitress brings over a few dishes, setting them in the center of the table between the two of you. Donghyuck nods in appreciation.

“Do you come here often?” you wonder, watching him pick up some meat and dip it into a few different sauces before shoving it into his mouth.

“Yea, it’s my favorite,” he smiles. He cocks his head, watching you stare at the food but not reaching for anything. “Don’t tell me, you don’t know how to eat this.”

“Of course…” you start, “I’ve seen people in my neighborhood eating…well whatever you would call this.”

“Wow,” Donghyuck smiles. “The rich girl from the big city has a hard time away from home.”

“Just stop talking,” you snap. “Can you just show me what to do?”

“Ok,” he smiles, proudly. He takes some scallions, breaking them apart, placing them into the pot in the center of the table. “First you put some veggies in and put the lid back on.” You lean closer, watching intently. “In the meantime, you mix the meat with this sauce and we cook it one by one.” He picks up one piece of meat, putting it into the pot on top of the scallions. “But don’t cook it for long or the meat will be too tough. And when it’s done, you dip it in this sauce.” Donghyuck held the meat out towards you, obviously wanting to feed you. You feel a little uncomfortable and still a bit hesitant about trying the food. “Come on,” he insists. “Good girls aren’t picky eaters,” he teases. 

You hesitate but ultimately cave and open your mouth to eat the meat. Donghyuck leans back, proudly, waiting for your expression to change. “Good, huh?” he asks.

It’s delicious, maybe some of the best meat you’ve had in a long time but you don’t want to give him the satisfaction. “It’s ok,” you sigh, trying to hide your enjoyment.

The waitress brings more food over to the table and you watch as he picks through. “I told her, no garlic,” he complains, sitting back in his chair. It makes you smile but you aren’t sure why.

After you both finish eating, Donghyuck pays the bill and you walk outside together. You pull some money out of your bag, attempting to hand it to him.

“Keep it,” he grunts. “I don’t want your money.”

“Thank you so much, sir,” you say sarcastically. You glance down at his sneakers which are falling apart. “But I think you should take this money so you can take better care of yourself. You need new shoes,” you state.

“It’s my style,” Donghyuck smirks.

“Your style?” you repeat. “Yea, ok.”

He walks with you back to your dorm, stopping behind you while you unlock your door. Once your door is open, he turns to get back on the elevator.

“Why don’t you go to her room?” you wonder.

“Yeji isn’t going to be home tonight,” he explains, taking a step closer towards you. “So I’m just gonna rest at my house.”

“Wait,” you say, “so you just walked me here?”

“Well, yea,” he smirks, placing his hand against your doorway so he could lean in closer to your face to whisper. “Do you want me to come in and hang out for a little with you?”

You stare into his eyes, contemplating letting him inside. For some reason you want to, god, did you want to. You don’t like that you wanted to though. What is going on with you? He has a girlfriend and you actually like her and yet you can’t seem to stop feeling like this. You gaze into his eyes, wanting to lean in and feel his lips against yours again. You want him to come inside and do whatever he wants to you but you know you have to control your urges. You have to fight these feelings at all costs.

“No, I don’t,” you state before walking inside and closing the door behind you. You stood on the inside of your apartment so disappointed in yourself that you even considered letting him in. This is not like you, whatsoever.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟽 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟼 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟾

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟽 : 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚔𝚎𝚝

You sit at a table in the university’s lunch room, surrounded by your friends and Donghyuck happily talking about classwork.

“See? You need to use the velocity and distance over here…” Donghyuck explains, looking at you. “Do you understand?”

You did understand, it finally makes sense to you but you can’t let him know that he helped. You can’t let your guard down, not again.

“No, I don’t understand…” you roll your eyes.

“How do you still not get it?” Donghyuck asks, readjusting in his seat. “You see the distance here…”

“I don’t understand why you have to tutor us everyday,” you snap.

Kun elbows you in your side, “you should be grateful that he does. Stop being such a bitch.”

You see the look of vindication on Donghyuck’s face. That smug smile that he always does. The one that used to enrage you to no end, lately makes you feel something different.

“But today you can actually be done a little early,” YangYang announces, closing his book.

“Why?” Donghyuck asks, glancing over at you. “You’re not bothering me.”

“YangYang is not that considerate,” Henderey laughs. “The market is open tonight and he wants to go pick up chicks.”

“No I don’t,” YangYang denies.

“I gotcha,” Donghyuck smiles, nodding his head. He turns to look at you, “How about you? Are you gonna go with them?”

“No,” you sigh. “I don’t like crowded places.” You look around at your friends all smiling at you with goofy looks on your face. “I’m thirsty, does anyone else need a drink?”

Your friends shake their heads no, you stand up, walking over to the coffee shop. 

“I’ll take a vanilla sweet cream cold brew,” you order as Donghyuck walks up behind.

“A rich girl all the way here for school, it’s a shame to not check out the local market,” he smirks leaning onto the counter. “Want a local to show you around?”

You want to accept his offer, you'd go anywhere with him but you keep those thoughts to yourself and instead, don't say anything. 

“I’ll take whatever she’s having, thank you” he orders.

“Oh hey Hyuck,” Yeji says, walking up to the both of you. “I was just going to text you about this evening.”

“This evening…” Donghyuck starts.

“Hi Yeji,” you interrupt.

She smiles at you, “hi Y/N.”

“What about this evening?” he continues.

“We made plans last night to go to the market,” Yeji explained.

“Oh yea, the market,” he nods. “Of course I remember. 4pm right, babe?”

“I’m gonna get a ride with Lia and I’ll meet you there,” she smiles.

“Sure baby, sounds good,” he nods. “I’ll see you there.”

Yeji smiles, gently touching your shoulder to say goodbye and walks away. The clerk hands you your coffee, you pay turning to walk away, scowling at him before returning to your friends.

“The professor didn’t teach you this?” Jaemin asks, now sitting at the table. 

“Oh yea we just learned that this morning,” Doyoung nods.

“Oh hi Jaemin,” you say.

“Hi Y/N,” he perks up when seeing you. He slides over on the bench, “you can sit here.”

“What are you doing here?” Donghyuck asks, returning to the table.

“I’m just helping them with their studies,” Jaemin explains. “You’re not the only one who can tutor.”

“Oh here, Y/N,” Jaemin smiles, handing you a pretty red box. “I got you some candy. I hope you like it.”

“Thank you,” you smile. “That’s really sweet, Jaemin.”

“I was wondering if you’re free this evening,” he asks. “I’d like to take you to the market.”

“She just said that she doesn’t like crowded places,” Donghyuck interjects, looking at your friends for confirmation. “Right?” You watch as your friends nod, supporting Donghyuck.

“Speaking of that,” you start as you make intent eye contact with Donghyuck. “I came all the way from the city, it’s a shame not to check out the market.” you then turn to look at Jaemin, “sure I’ll go with you.”

Donghyuck drives his motorcycle to the market, parks, and walks to the front entrance, waiting for his girlfriend to show. He looks around, with no signs of Yeji. He waits patiently for fifteen minutes then decides to call.

“Hey baby, where are you?” he asks immediately when she answers the phone. “I’m in front of the market, waiting on you.”

“Oh my god, Hyuck,” she gasps. “I had something major come up with one of my classes and I can’t make it.”

“What? But…” he whines.

“You can’t go in without me,” Yeji interrupts. “We’ll go together next week, I promise Hyuckie.” He hesitates, disappointed but ends up agreeing. “Call me when you’re home,” she orders. “And remember don’t do the market without me.”

“Sure,” he agrees. “I love you.”

But Yeji already disconnected the call. He looks at his phone before placing it back into his pocket. Donghyuck is getting ready to leave when he sees you and Jaemin walking towards the entrance.

“Oh hey Hyuck,” Jaemin smiles. “Where’s Yeji?”

“I was supposed to meet her but I just got stood up,” Donghyuck explains. “So I’m just gonna head home”

“Since you're here,” Jaemin sighs, “you can hang with us, if you want.”

Donghyuck stares at you and he could tell you were a little uncomfortable with the idea but knows you’d never admit it.  “Sure,” he nods.

“Great,” Jaemin says, forcing a smile onto his face. “Let’s go.” He wraps his arm around your shoulder, leading you inside of the market, Donghyuck trailing behind.

“It’s really crowded here,” Jaemin announces. “It makes it so much hotter.”

You are eagerly looking around in amazement, never attending a local market before. Jaemin removes his arm from your shoulder to stop at a stand, purchasing himself a strawberry lemonade. 

“It is really hot in here,” you whine.

Jaemin held his cup up in front of you, “here Y/N, you can have some of my drink.” You hesitate but place your lips on the straw, drawing the strawberry lemonade into your mouth. 

“Mmmm, that’s really good,” you smile.

Donghyuck looks on with total disgust. He doesn't know why he is so bothered by you drinking from Jaemin’s straw but either way he doesn’t like it.

“I want a mala kebab,” Jaemin states, looking at you. “Would you like one?”

“Sure,” you smile unsure if you would like it but you don’t want to disappoint him.

“Ok great, wait here. I’ll go get us some,” Jaemin says, running off leaving you alone with Donghyuck.

You look at him quickly and with a soft voice say, “if you’re not ok, you don’t have to stay.”

“I’m ok,” he laughs, “it’s been…uh…fun.”

“So I was just reading into things and thought you seemed uncomfortable,” you sigh, looking around.

“Come on, what are you talking about?” he asks, shrugging nonchalantly. “I’m fine.”

“Ok good,” you nod as Jaemin returns.

“Let’s go find somewhere to sit so we can eat,” Jaemin suggests walking towards some picnic benches.

“Hey you hey hey…” a woman calls out from a table. She is seated at a table covered in a celestial table cloth with a crystal ball to the side and tarot cards scattered in front of her. “You’re likely to encounter an unfortunate fate.”

You stop walking, turning to look at the woman, intrigued by what she was saying. “Me?” you ask.

“Yes, you, come here,” the woman orders.

“Don’t listen to her, she says that to everyone,” Jaemin whispers in your ear. “Let’s go.”

“But your lovelife,” the woman continues. “It’s going to be splendid. Come here, young lady.”

“But I don’t think it’ll be that harmful to see what she has to say,” Jaemin adds, guiding you over to her table with his hand on the swell of your back. “I’ll pay for it.”

Jaemin sits down, signaling for you to sit in the seat next to him.

“Ok give me your palm,” the woman orders. She closes her eyes, whispering a prayer to herself before reopening them and focuses on your hand. “Are you going through a heartbreak?” she asks.

“What?” Jaemin asks, “how do you know that?” You turn to look at him a little annoyed.

“But it will be alright,” she continues. “You are not meant to be with that man. The one who you are meant to be is nearby.”

Jaemin bites his lip and fixes his hair assuming she was talking about him while Donghyuck moves a little closer to be able to hear better.

“But this love won’t be easy,” the woman continues. “Because it’s someone who has already taken. You’re fated to lose a lot of tears. Because the one you like is very stupid, he loves you but does a lot of lousy things to you. In the end, you’re…”

“Alright that’s enough,” Jaemin interrupts. “This is all bullshit. What is someone who has already taken? It’s not even accurate, Y/N. Let’s just go.”

Jaemin stands up, throwing some cash onto the table, grabbing your arm and pulling you up out of your chair. You want to hear what else she has to say but you don’t want to upset him anymore than what he already seems to be. Donghyuck follows behind the two of you.

You continue wandering around the market, getting excited when you see a cute jewelry shop.  You run inside the store, looking at the bracelets. Jaemin walks over, watching you with a giant smile on his face. “Pick out anything you like and I’ll get it for you,” he announces.

You grab two bracelets, one in each hand trying to decide which one you like better.

“I like the right one,” Jaemin smiles.

Donghyuck walks up pushing his head in between you and Jaemin, blocking your view of each other. “I prefer the left one,” Donghyuck states.

“What’s with you?” Jaemin asks, pushing his friend out of the way.

You continue to look at the bracelets, “I choose the left one…for you Jaemin, to thank you for bringing me here. And the right one is for me.”

“Ok,” Jaemin smiles, “I'll go pay for them.”

When Jaemin walks over to the cashier, Donghyuck grabs your arm, pulling you outside with him. He continues yanking you until you are a little ways away from the store.

“What are you doing?” you snap, pulling your arm away from his grip.

“I don’t know,” he sighs. “I just don’t like it when you’re with Jaemin.”

“Why?” you ask.

“I said I don’t know,” Donghyuck whines. “But you need to choose…him or me. If you choose him, I’ll go home.

“I…” you hesitate.

“Hey,” Jaemin says, walking towards you. “I’ve been looking for you two.”

“It was crowded over there and I felt a little uncomfortable so we waited for you over here,” you lie.

“Are you hungry?” Jaemin quickly changes the subject. “I want to take you to the famous grilled fish stand. People come from all over to eat this fish.”

“Ok,” you smile.

“Alright Jaemin, I think I’m going home,” Donghyuck says, patting his friend's arm.

“Why don’t you just stay and eat dinner with us?” Jaemin suggests causing you to roll your eyes.

“No it’s alright,” Donghyuck says.

Just as you open your mouth to chime in you feel someone grab you from behind. You could feel the cold steel of a blade pressing against your cheek.

“Don’t come any closer,” the maniac behind you yells.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟾 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟽 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟿

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟾 : 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚊𝚍

“Don’t come any closer,” the maniac holding a knife to your throat yells. “I need to be on tv so my wife will bring my kids here to see me.”

You could see the panic in Donghyuck’s eyes when he realizes what's happening. 

“Don’t come any closer or I’ll kill her,” the maniac yells.

“Ok ok ok, calm down,” Donghyuck begs. “Just listen to me man, you seem like you really love your family…”

“So what?” the man screams. “Is that a bad thing?”

“No not at all,” Donghyuck states. “You love your wife well, I also love my girl. And…It’s…just…you have my girl. I’ve been trying to win her heart for so long and I just love her so much. I can’t bear the thought of anything bad happening to her. Can you just take me instead?”

“You’re gonna try something funny, if I let her go,” the man growls, waving his knife around.

“I won’t do anything,” Donghyuck confesses. “No one here is trying to trick you. I’m telling you the truth.”

“Damn it don’t come any closer,” the man yells, placing the knife against your throat again.

“You can stab me,” Donghyuck suggests. “But I wouldn’t be able to handle watching my love getting hurt in front of me…I’d sooner be the one to die.” You can see the tears welling up in Donghyuck’s eyes as he’s pleading for your safe release. “I have never had the opportunity to do anything really nice for her. I’m begging you. Please let me do this one thing…let me show her how much I love her,” Donghyuck continues begging. “Just take me instead. Please.”

You feel the man slowly loosen his grip on you. Donghyuck grabs you and pushes you away then he and Jaemin wrestle the maniac to the ground until security takes over. You can barely catch your breath, you could have died. Who knows what would have happened if it wasn’t for Donghyuck.

When the police arrive, Jaemin walks over, placing his arm around your shoulder trying to aid some comfort so Donghyuck can go to speak with the officers. Once the police lead the masked man away they place him in the back of a patrol car. Donghyuck takes a seat on a bench, thinking about everything that happened. He can feel his heart still beating like crazy.

“Are you ok?” Jaemin asks, walking over to his friend as you trail behind.

“They said he escaped from the mental hospital,” Donghyuck announces.

“What about the family he was talking about?” Jaemin asks, sitting down on the bench next to his friend.

“He doesn’t have a family, it’s all in his head,” Donghyuck explains. “They said that’s his thing, he always talks about his ‘family’ and what he has to do for them.”

“Holy shit,” Jaemin sighs, looking at you still standing in front of them. “I’m just glad nothing happened to Y/N.”

You look down at your feet, clearly still shaken up from everything. “Can we just call it a day?” you wonder, hoping Jaemin will understand.

“Actually, we need to talk to the police,” Donghyuck sighs, looking at Jaemin. “But you two can go hang out…I’ll handle the cops.”

“No we’ll stay with you,” Jaemin argues, nudging him in the side with his elbow.

“It’s ok…look at her,” Donghyuck states, pointing at you. “Get her something to eat to calm her nerves down a little.”

You watch as Donghyuck stares at his feet while he is talking. You notice that his old shoes that you told him to replace are now literally falling apart and the sole is hanging off the shoe.

“We’ve been through a lot today,” Jaemin sighs. “Call me if you need anything at all.”

“I will,” Donghyuck nods.

Jaemin stands up, grabbing your arm, “Come on, let’s go get something to eat at that fish stand I was telling you about.” He turns to look at Donghyuck once more, “don’t forget to call if you need anything.”

You look at Donghyuck before walking away. You want to hug him, thank him for saving your life. You want to ask if he meant any of what he said but you know that now is not the time. You silently walk off with Jaemin, leaving Donghyuck alone on the bench.  You and Jaemin start walking around the market together but you can’t stop thinking about Donghyuck. 

“Are you hungry, Y/N? Should we get some grilled fish?” Jaemin asks.

“No, I don’t think I can eat right now,” you say.

“Ok,” Jaemin smiles, gesturing at another store. “They look like they have some interesting things, shall we check it out?”

You pull your phone out of your pocket, looking at it. “Oh no,” you gasp. “YangYang just texted me and said he needs me right away. I guess he’s going through a crisis.”

“Where does YangYang live?” Jaemin asks. “I can give you a ride.”

“No that’s ok,” you smile. “He says he’s waiting for me outside the market. You can just leave me here.”

“I’ll walk you there,” Jaemin offers.

“No thanks, I’ll see you later,” you smile as you start to walk away from him. “But thanks for everything, I had a lot of fun.”

Donghyuck is sitting on a street statue that isn’t too far from where everything with the knife wielding maniac happened. He sighs when he looks at his ruined shoe. 

“I told you they were old,” you say, walking up to him.

He looks around for a few seconds before asking, “where’s Jaemin?”

“He had something come up,” you lie.

“I see,” Donghyuck smirks. “So I’m your backup?”

“I understand if you don’t want to hang out with me,” you say, looking down at the ground trying to avoid eye contact.

“If I let a city girl hang out here alone, she will get lost for sure. Or something worse,” Donghyuck states.

You look down at the bag in your hands, trying to convince yourself to give it to him. You take a deep breath and hand it to him, still not looking directly at him.

“What is it?” he wonders.

You shake the bag in his face, signaling it was for him without having to say the words. He takes the bag, reaching inside and slowly pulling out a new pair of sneakers. He looks at you shocked.

“Well, your shoes did rip because you were helping me, right?” you ask.

“You noticed that?” he asks, surprised.

“Stop talking,” you snap. “Do you want them or not?”

“Sure,” Donghyuck smiles. “My grandmother always says that a couple shouldn’t give each other shoes or they’ll end up breaking up.”

“That works out perfectly,” you smile. “Since we’re not a couple.”

“I know,” he nods as his smile fades.

“Try them on,” you order.

Donghyuck takes his old sneakers off, throwing them onto the ground. He slips the new sneakers on to his feet. As he starts tying his right shoe, you bend down to tie the left shoe for him.  You both slowly look up from the shoes, making eye contact. This is the first time you can sense how he feels just by the way he is looking at you and you can’t deny that you feel the same way.

Donghyuck bites his lip, looking a little shy, “thanks,” he says.

You can’t help but smile at how cute he is. “Thank you too.”

You walk with him to where his motorcycle is parked.

“Why are you letting me take you home without a fight?” he asks.

“I’m tired tonight,” you smirk.

Donghyuck smiles at you as he gets onto his bike. While he adjusts, you look around and see Yeji standing by the street. A white Mercedes convertible with the windows tinted pulls up, stopping in front of her.  

“Well hop on,” he orders. When you don’t instantly listen, he turns to see what you are doing…

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟿 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟾 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟶

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟿 : 𝚠𝚎 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐

The morning sun shining through the window wakes you from your peaceful slumber. You rub your eyes before looking around your dorm, seeing Donghyuck is still fast asleep on your sofa. You slowly sit up in bed, looking over at him peacefully sleeping.

You smack the pillow that his head is resting on. “Get up,” you order. When he doesn’t respond you hit the pillow harder and yell “GET UP.”

Donghyuck rolls over, pulling the blanket up over his face, “let me sleep. I don’t have class this morning.”

“You gotta get up,” you snap. “Yeji might be worried about you.”

“Shit your right,” he quickly sits up, grabbing his phone. “Fuck, when did she text me?”

“Just go back to her room so she won’t worry,” you huff.

“Yea I’m going now,” he nods, standing up from the sofa. He quickly leaves your place, going to her room and walking inside, only to find an empty room. He plops down onto the bed before attempting to call her.

“Where are you, Yeji?” he asks. “I’m in your room.”

“I’m at Lia’s,” Yeji explains. “We’ve been working on our report since last night.”

“Want me to come pick you up?” he offers.

“No,” she states with no explanation.

“Ok,” Donghyuck sighs. “Well, have a good day and try to get some rest. I worry that you’re working too hard.”

“You’re the best,” Yeji says. “Love ya, Hyuck.”

“I love you too, Yeji.”

You sit on your bed, pouting by yourself. You can’t stop yourself from thinking about last night.

Donghyuck got onto his motorcycle, waiting for you to get on the back, when you saw a white Mercedes pull over in front of Yeji. The windows were tinted but you thought you could see a man sitting in the driver’s seat.

“Hop on,” Donghyuck ordered. When you didn’t instantly listen he turned to look at you.

Yeji was already inside the car and it was pulling away.

“What’s wrong?” he wondered, you shook your head as you climbed onto his bike, slowly grabbing his waist.

Why didn’t you tell him what you saw? Would he have believed you if you had mentioned it? By the time Donghyuck noticed something was wrong with you, Yeji was already out of sight so it was probably better that you didn’t say anything at all. You rub your face feeling completely defeated.

You finally get up and get ready for your classes, heading outside hoping to quickly get a taxi. You definitely don’t feel like walking. You look around with no signs of a taxi, after glancing at the time on your phone, Donghyuck pulls over on his bike.

“Do you want a ride?” he asks.

“What about Yeji?” you wonder, not wanting to cause an issue for the two of them.

“She’s fine,” he sighs, scrunching his nose. “Are you coming or not?”

You look around, weighing your options, “nah, I think I’d rather take the bus.”

“Stop playing hard to get,” he laughs, “get on.”

“I said no,” you snap, becoming frustrated that he never listens to you but deep down you kind of appreciate his determination.

“Fine,” he sighs. “If you won’t come with me then I guess I won’t go either.” He smiles with that classic shit eating grin on his face as he gets off of his motorcycle holding a light purple helmet in his hand. He gently places the helmet onto your head with no resistance from you and secures it firmly while looking into your eyes.

You sigh when he turns to get back on his bike and slowly crawls onto the back. You don’t want to grab his waist because you do not want to feel that electricity shoot through you, like it does every time you touch. Donghyuck takes off with more speed than normal which forces you to grab onto him, instinctively.

He drives to the university, parking his bike where the other motorcycles are parked. You hop off, taking your helmet off, handing it to him once he was standing in front of you.

“I’m hungry,” he states, rubbing his stomach. “Are you hungry?”

“Yea a little,” you nod.

“Ok so…” Donghyuck starts.

“But I already made plans with my friends,” you lie. “I’ll see you around.” You turn, quickly running towards the university building. 

“Y/N WAIT!” he yells, hoping you would come back to him.

You ignore his calls, continuing to run to the canteen. You purchase a blueberry muffin and sit at a table alone. While You zone out, thinking about everything that is happening in your life, Donghyuck sits across from you at your table. He places a vanilla sweet cream cold brew down on the table. “Here I got this for you,” he smiles, proudly. “I figured you could use a little comfort since you clearly got stood up by your friends.” 

You turn to look away, biting your lip out of frustration. “You give me such a headache,” he sighs. “One minute you're so sweet to me, then the next you’re all cold. I never know what to expect.”

“You don’t need to expect anything,” you snap.

“Why can’t I?” he wonders. “Since we are…”

His phone starts to ring, stopping him from finishing his statement. He quickly answers the call, after seeing Yeji’s name on the screen. He glances at you, briefly, before speaking. “Hey baby,” he says. 

Those words made you feel something unexpected. It’s almost the same feelings you felt while watching Jisung with Karina. But this is different, you were in love with Jisung and this, well this is just Donghyuck. You still can’t stand him and nothing is going to change that. You exhale slowly, trying to not show any emotions or expression on your face. 

“I’m at the university…Oh? You’re back at the dorm? Ok baby, make sure you get some rest ....If I don’t worry about you then who would I worry about?” he asks.

You zone out, trying not to listen to his conversation any longer. Without thinking, you reach over and start to pick the chunks of garlic out of his food. This gets his attention and sees the sad look on your face.

“I’m gonna let you go,” he announces. “I’ll see you soon, babe.” Donghyuck disconnects the call, laying his phone on the table before looking at you. “What are you doing?” 

“Nothing,” you panic. “I’m bored so I um well I was just wasting time.”

“Hmm, really?” Donghyuck asks. “Were you picking the garlic out of my food because you remembered that I don’t like it?”

You don't respond, he caught you red handed and there really isn’t any other reasonable excuse you could say. You pout, looking down at the table, refusing to make eye contact with him. “You’re so cute,” he smiles, reaching over and gently touching your cheek.

You knock his hand away, “stop doing this. Stop trying to hang out with me and stop talking to me. I don’t know why you’re acting like this anyways, you and I are nothing,” you state, coldly. 

“But we did…you know…we did it,” he smirks with a wink.

“Yea and it was just that,” you snap, fighting off tears. You don’t want to have to be mean but if you are going to get through to him, you know what you have to do. “If you feel responsible for that, don’t. I’m a big girl and I made the choice to do that. It’s not on you at all. And besides, that is not a reason for us to get together, people hook up all the time and never see or talk to each other again.”

Donghyuck wants to speak up and tell you the real reason he’s been hanging around you. The reason not being the one night of passion that you two shared but he fights the urge. 

“Do I need to remind you?” you snap. “I’m the one who was trying to get with your best friend and you hate me. So now that I listened to you… I’m no longer in love with your friend and I’m leaving him alone…you should leave me alone as well.”

“Really, Y/N?” he sighs. “Is that really how you see me?” You don’t, but you said what you said and you can’t take it back now. “Answer me, damn it,” he demands. 

You can see the pain in his eyes when you finally look at him but, you have to force him out of your life. “For me…you’re just another guy.” You pick up your trash and quickly walk out of the cafeteria, fearful you will cave if you continue looking at him with such emotion on his face.

After class is dismissed follow your friends into the hallway. You immediately stop walking once you notice Donghyuck standing in the hallway.

“Hey,” Doyoung smiles.

“Can I borrow your friend?” Donghyuck asks.

“But I have nothing to do with you,” you snap, grabbing YangYang’s arm pulling him in the opposite direction, “let’s go eat.” You feel someone grab your arm, pulling you back.

“I won't keep you long, I promise,” Donghyuck states. He doesn’t give you an opportunity to refuse as he pulls you away from your friends and into a staircase.

“What are you going to do?” you ask, looking directly into his eyes.

“You told me this morning that you no longer have any feelings for Jisung,” he huffs. “But I don’t believe you. When you ‘love’ someone, is it really that easy to walk away?”

“You can make all the assumptions that you want,” you snap, raising your voice in order to show your seriousness. “But I’m honestly done with him.”

“And what made you move on so quickly?” Donghyuck asks, raising an eyebrow while cocking his head at you. “Or do you have feelings for someone else?”

YES! You want to scream it out loud. You want to punch him for making you feel this way. But you don’t say anything at all.

“Who is it?” he pushes. “Is it that kid you had on the rooftop? Or Jaemin?”

“Anyone…” you say, starting to get mad. “But you.”

You saw the cockiness leave his face being replaced with discouragement. “Come with me,” he whispers.

“Where to?” you ask.

“To assure me,” Donghyuck continues, “that you’re really over Jisung. Once I’m sure, then I can interpret the way you looked at me earlier.”

He grabs your arm pulling you behind him. You walk through the locker room, on the other side you see Karina and Jisung sitting together on the edge of the pool.

“Hey Sung,” he calls, “can I join you?”

“Of course,” Jisung smiles.

Donghyuck looks at you, analyzing your facial expressions, but only seeing anger. “What’s wrong?” he whispers, “can’t handle seeing a loving couple?”

You glare, “aren’t you afraid that this is going to make them uncomfortable?”

“Why would I be, if you no longer love him it shouldn’t be an issue,” he raises an eyebrow. “Wait for me here.”

Donghyuck goes back inside of the locker room, leaving you standing alone. You watch as Karina stands and retrieves two bottles of water for her and Jisung. They act as though they’re the only people that matter when they are together. You feel a rush of jealousy but not the same kind of jealousy that you used to feel. It’s different, you no longer long to be with Jisung in that way, you now wish you could have that with someone else. 

Donghyuck returns wearing only a bathing suit. You subconsciously look him up and down, smirking slightly at how amazing he looks.

“What are you looking at? You like what you see?” he asks, smirking. Not giving you time to respond he announces, “I’m gonna swim.”

“Hey Hyuck, you wanna do a double swimming race?” Jisung asks. “So I can practice too?”

“Of course,” he smiles. “You team up with Karina and I’ll be with Y/N.”

“What?” you gasp, meeting Donghyuck’s pleading eyes. How could you say no to that? You sigh before going into the locker room, returning wearing your bathing suit.

Karina and you dive into the pool at the same time racing down the lanes while Jisung and Donghyuck watch on.

“Y/N isn't half bad,” Donghyuck smiles, proudly.

Jisung looks at him suspiciously, “and what made you want to join our swimming practice? You never come when I ask.”

Donghyuck glances at you still swimming then back at his friend, “well nothing really.”

“Oh yea?” Jisung asks. “Did you just want to bring her to the pool?”

Donghyuck doesn’t answer, mainly because he doesn’t know how to exactly. He can’t explain to his friend what his real intentions are and Jisung couldn’t possibly understand. He prepares to dive in when you return. He notices a fresh blood stain on the diving platform. Once you touch the side of the pool, Donghyuck dives in and proceeds to swim, attempting to beat his friend who is already swimming and in the lead.

“Come on, Sungie,” Karina yells. “Faster, faster. You got this.”

Jisung reaches the platform first, but only seconds before Donghyuck. He can see the look of disappointment on your face. He lifts himself out of the pool and walks off, leaving you behind with Jisung and Karina, quickly returning with a bottle of water in his hand. He pushes you on to the swimming platform, forcing you to sit while he kneels down in front of you. He gently lifts your right foot up, pouring water onto the bottom of your foot, where you have an open wound.

“How did you know…” you ask, “...that I hurt my foot?”

“I saw the blood on the platform,” he explains, looking up at you.

“Are you that smooth?” you scoff.

“It’s like when you noticed my shoes,” he continues.

You look around with your eyes, but quickly land back on him.“Sooo…did you get your answer?” you ask.

Donghyuck stares intently into your eyes. “I know the answer about you and Jisung.” he says, glancing in his friend's direction. “I believe you now when you say you no longer have feelings for him.”

“How can you be so sure?” you ask.

“By the way you look at him,” he explains. His phone that was sitting on the bench starts to ring. He runs over to answer it before he misses the call.

“Hey, Yeji,” he says. “Late again, babe?”

You watch him from the swimming platform. Your heart is still pounding from when he touched your foot and it excites you that he openly expressed that he cared about you.

“Ok,” he sighs. “Please make sure you take care of yourself.”

You don’t wait for him to return to where you were sitting, you stand up and walk into the locker room to get changed out of your bathing suit.

Jisung walks over to his friend, “hey,” he sighs.

“Hey,” Donghyuck sighs. “Good news is that I’m pretty sure she has finally given up on you.”

Jisung looks away from him, suspiciously, “and here I thought you wanted something else with her. You were just testing her?”

“Indeed,” he smiles. “Why are you so surprised?”

“I thought you knew for a while now that she no longer likes me,” Jisung smirks. “I’m almost certain that you brought her here for another reason.”

“What reason?” Donghyuck snaps.

“It doesn’t matter,” Jisung sighs. “But did you get your answer?”

“Kind of…but at the same time, I’m not sure,” he confesses. 

“In my opinion,” Jisung starts. “Things happen for a reason. But what I want to know is what are you planning on doing once you have your answer?” Jisung lightly pats his friend’s shoulder before walking away, leaving him to reflect on his situation.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟶 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟿 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟷

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟶 : 𝙸 𝚠𝚒𝚕𝚕 𝚝𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚑𝚒𝚖

You hold your glass of whiskey in the air, clinking it against your friends. This is the kind of night you need, one that you can just relax with the people you love the most.

“Bottoms up,” YangYang smiles.

“Don’t rush man,” Doyoung orders. “We have all night.”

“This place has a good vibe,” Hendery states, looking around.

“Yea I like it here,” Kun nods.

You receive a text, picking up your phone seeing it was from Donghyuck.

PAIN IN THE ASS: “Did you get there safely?”

You can’t help but to smile after reading his text. He does seem to care about you, he just has an odd way of showing it at times.

Hendery sits up in his seat, leaning on his elbows on the table, “who is it?” he asks.

“Is it your new boy?” YangYang teases.

“What new boy?” you ask, putting your phone back onto the table.

“I smell something fishy,” Doyoung says. “Why are you being so secretive?”

You raise your glass in the air, signaling with the other hand for your friends to join you in a toast.

“Look at that,” Kun laughs. “She’s trying to change the subject.”

“It’s so obvious,” YangYang states, with a huge smirk on his face. “You never raise your glass first…it’s always us.”

“That’s true,” Doyoung agrees.

You take a few long sips of your drink before shaking your head. “I’m just bored.”

“Ok, we’ll just pretend that’s the real reason,” YangYang smirks.

A cute man that was sitting at the bar and has been staring at you the entire night, walks over to your table. “Hey there, I’m Yuta,” he says. “And you are?”

You look at your friends with your eyes only, before responding, “Y/N.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” he continues smiling. “My friends just bailed on me…would I be able to join y’all?”

“Scoot down,” Hendery smirks at you.

“Please,” Yuta begs.

“I don’t think so,” you smile. “We’re not really trying to hang out with new people tonight.”

“Ok,” Yuta sighs. “Well can I at least get your number?”

“Wow,” YangYang laughs.

You look down at the table, “I don’t have a phone. I’m sorry.”

“I see,” Yuta sighs. “Thanks anyways.” He walks away, places his glass on the bar and proceeds to leave. You feel bad for lying but you don't want any more drama in your life.

“Y/N, what the hell is going on with you?” YangYang asks.

“You could have just given him your number and chatted with him,” Kun states. “It wouldn’t have meant you were committing to anything.”

“He also seemed like your type,” Doyoung adds.

“What's wrong with you?” Hendery asks, looking at YangYang. “You’re acting really weird.”

“Oh my god,” YangYang gasps, hitting the table. “The rumor about you having a new crush must be true.”

“Admit it,” Kun demands, placing his arm around your shoulder. “You can trust us.”

You shake your head, “you guys gotta stop believing gossip.”

“Then why are you acting so weird?” Doyoung asks.

“I’m not acting weird,” you deny. “Nothing has changed.”

Donghyuck shows up to Yeji’s dorm with takeout from a local restaurant in hopes of surprising her. He walks inside to find her room empty. He places the bag onto her desk as he removes his phone from his pocket. He sits down on her bed before dialing her number.

“Hey,” he says once she answers the call. “Where are you?”

“Hyuck, I’m sorry,” Yeji whines. “I forgot to tell you that we’re not done with that project yet.”

“Oooh,” he sighs. “Well when are you gonna be done? Do you want me to pick you up after?”

“I think I’m going to have to sleep here,” she explains. “I don’t want to leave Lia to have to do all of the work.”

“Uh huh,” he grunts. “I gotcha. So take care of yourself, I guess.”

“I’m so sorry. Are you mad?” Yeji asks.

“I’m not mad,” he sighs. “But I'm done wasting the time you need for your project. Try not to work too hard, babe.”

“Hyuck, you’re always so good to me,” she says. “I gotta go. Bye bye.”

“Bye,” he sighs, hanging up the call.

You and your friends are finally leaving the bar. You and YangYang have your arms around Hendery, holding him up.

“I thought you said you could handle your liquor,” you tease.

“I’m not drunk,” he argues as he slurs his words.

“Man, you're really a light weight,” YangYang laughs. “No wonder you never come out with us.”

“I’ll kick your ass,” Hendery states.

You laugh pulling Kun over to take your spot in supporting Hendery. “Alright guys, drive carefully,” you say. 

“Where are you going?” Doyoung wonders.

“I’m just gonna order a taxi,” you explain. “We can’t all fit into one car and you all are going to the same spot.”

“Noooooo,” YangYang whines. “Don’t leave me with them.”

You laugh, “have fun and text me when you guys are home.”

You turn around, walking back towards the entrance of the bar when you see a man opening the door on a white Mercedes convertible and Yeji climbing inside. Once she is seated the man bends down and kisses her before closing the door and crawling into the driver’s seat.

You can’t believe what you are seeing. You didn’t think she was the type of person to do something like this.

You’re sitting in the library working on schoolwork alone when Jaemin spots you. He happily walks over.

“Hey Y/N,” he smiles, sitting down in the seat next to you. “Did your friends bail on you?”

“Oh hey Jaemin,” you say, returning his smile. “No, I just have some stuff I need to get done.”

“Are you doing a report?” he wonders, trying to look at the papers on the table in front of you. “Want some help?”

“It’s ok,” you sigh. “I don’t want to bother you.”

“Don’t think like that, Y/N,” Jaemin beams. “I’m willing to help you with anything.” You nod, looking down at the table.

“Do you have some questions?” he asks.

“Actually, I do,” you announce. “Can I ask you one thing?”

“Sure, anything,” he agrees, readjusting in his seat to face you.

“Donghyuck and Yeji have been together for a long time, right?” you ask.

“Oh,” Jaemin says as his smile slowly drops from his face. “I thought it was going to be about one of your classes.”

“There’s no special reason, I’m just curious,” you say, panicking that you were letting your feelings show. “Donghyuck is so rude all of the time and it seems unlikely that he’d be able to get someone like Yeji, so I was just curious.”

“Well, you came to the right person,” Jaemin boasts proudly. “I’ve known both of them before they even hooked up. They were homecoming king and queen and everyone was shipping them. The strong vibes and intimacy became real after a while. We were all worried about them when they first made things official. Worried that they wouldn’t make it but we’ve been watching their love grow for each other, and here we are three years later and they’re still going strong.”

“Three years?” you repeat, suddenly feeling guilty for a multitude of reasons. 

“The only thing left is to send the wedding invites out,” he laughs.

“So it’s not likely that one of them would cheat?” you wonder.

“Of course not. Neither one of them would ever do anything to hurt the other,” Jaemin states. “Why do you ask?”

“No reason,” you smile looking away.

When you walk outside from the library to go home for the day, the heavens open up and it starts to pour. You forgot your umbrella at home and don’t want to risk getting sick since it was an unusually cold rain.

You stand under the pavilion waiting for the rain to ease up a little so you can get home without getting completely soaked. Donghyuck sneaks up from behind, joining you under the safety of the pavilion.

You look at him, “why are you still here?”

“I’m stuck here because of the rain, just like you,” he explains.

You look down at the ground noticing that he is holding an umbrella. “And what about the thing in your hand?” you scoff.

“It’s an umbrella,” he smiles. “Do you want me to ride with one hand and hold an umbrella with the other? I’d rather wait until the rain stops plus I have some company now.”

“Tell me honestly,” you sigh, “Were you this cheeky when you pursued Yeji?”

His smile instantly drops from his face. “What do you mean by that?” he asks, seriously.

“I think it’s time we have a serious talk,” you state. “I no longer have any feelings for Jisung so…there’s no reason for us to keep seeing each other right?”

“This is how you want things to end between us?” he asks, with so much hurt in his eyes.

“Mhm,” you nod. “Or do you want something else?”

Donghyuck looks away from you. He can’t look into your eyes when they are filled with so much pain. “Yes, I do,” he sighs. “However, we will still see each other all the time because we’re in the same school.”

You nod, fighting back the tears. “You’re right…then that’s just what we are.”

You look forward, avoiding looking at him at all costs but you can still see him watching you out of the corner of your eye. You both wait for the rain to stop in silence, neither of you knowing the right thing to say after that conversation. He presses his umbrella against your chest. “It’s probably going to rain for a while,” he states. “Take it.”

“I don’t want it,” you snap, pushing his hand away.

“This is an order,” he scoffs, grabbing your arm, pulling it up in the air so he can place the umbrella into your hand.

You don’t know how to respond, so you don’t say anything. You walk out from the protection of the pavilion and head towards your dorm, without opening the umbrella that he insisted you take.

By the time you reach your dorm room, you are completely soaked. You walk inside, throwing the unopened umbrella onto the table. You fight the urge to cry while staring at the umbrella laying on the table. You finally strip out of your wet clothes, shower and get dressed into something more comfortable.

You run down to the vending machine room on the first floor to buy some snacks for comfort, taking the stairs back up to your floor.

“Go home, now,” Yeji says, staring into the eyes of the man who you saw driving the white Mercedes.

He leans forward, pressing his lips onto hers. “Hyunseung,” she gasps, pulling away.

“I can’t help myself,” he smirks.

“Someone might see us,” she sighs.

“If you’re so worried then I guess I should do something more,” he winks.

“That’s it,” she playfully smacks his chest.

“I’m just kidding,” he laughs. “Alright, I’m gonna go before ‘someone’ comes.”

“Ok,” she smiles, shyly looking down at her feet. “Drive safely and text me when you get home.”

“Will do baby,” he whispers, blowing a kiss at her.

She turns to watch him get onto the elevator with a giant smile on her face that slowly fades when she notices you walking down the hallway from the staircase.

You don’t look at her, hoping that she won't talk to you. You try to quickly unlock your door to get inside as fast as possible.

“Y/N,” she says. 

You stop fidgeting with your door but refuse to look up, pausing only to hear what she has to say.

“Can you please not tell Donghyuck?” she asks. “I…I will tell him myself.”

You stare at the door not knowing how to respond. 

“Please,” she begs.

“Okay,” you sigh, walking into your dorm, and closing the door behind you.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟷 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟶 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟸

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟷 : 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚜𝚖𝚎𝚕𝚕 𝚗𝚒𝚌𝚎

After the night you saw Yeji with her new boyfriend or whatever he is, you wait for the backlash of her telling Donghyuck the news. But it never comes. Donghyuck still is in and out of Yeji’s dorm. They actually seem to be together more often than before.

You sit in the cafeteria surrounded by your friends. They’re happily engaging in mindless jabber as you watch Donghyuck and Yeji acting like a happy couple sitting with his friends. It honestly makes your stomach churn.

“Can I ask you a question?” you interrupt your friend's mindless chatter. Intrigued, they all turn to listen to your impending question. “Ok, what if YangYang had a girlfriend and one of you saw his girlfriend with another man, would you tell him?”

“What’s wrong with you?” YangYang whines. “Jinxing me before I even get a girl.”

“Stop bitching,” you snap. “It’s a hypothetical question.”

“It’s hard to say,” Doyoung ponders, thoughtfully. 

“Right,” Kun agrees. “I mean it really wouldn’t be any of our business.”

“It’d be good if he’d listen but what if he doesn’t believe what we say,” Hendery adds.

“Or if he does listen and then they make up,” Doyoung says. “And then we’d be the asshole.”

“But I think this scenario is completely impossible,” Kun smirks. “YangYang will never land a girl, especially one that’s hot enough to cheat.”

“Shut the hell up.” YangYang snaps, throwing a plastic fork at his friend.

You trail behind your friends exiting your last class of the day. You are in your own little world, looking down at the ground and not listening to your friend’s conversation.

“What should we do tonight?” YangYang wonders, stretching his arms out above his head. 

Donghyuck steps out from the side, blocking the walkway so you and your friends can’t get around him. He doesn’t acknowledge your presence, instead, he turns to Doyoung and YangYang asking, “Can I borrow your friend for a little?”

“Yeah sure, take her,” Doyoung smiles, causing you to turn to glare at your friend, which appears to amuse him. “Just go with him, Y/N.”

YangYang leans in your direction and whispers, “have fun, BooBoo.”

You bite your lip while cocking your head in annoyance. Doyoung wraps his arm around YangYang, gently guiding him away from the two of you, “come on let’s go,” he orders.

You can’t believe your friends were so quick to abandon you the way they just had. You have to remind yourself that they really don’t understand the situation and if they had, you would like to think that this outcome would have been completely different. Although, you know for a fact that both of them were able to tell that you had no interest in going anywhere with Donghyuck, so why were they so quick to push for it? Nothing seems to make sense anymore.

“What do you want now?” you ask. “You’re interrupting my plans with my REAL friends.”

“I need your advice on Yeji,” he sighs, clearly hesitant. 

You look at him with wide eyes, surprised he came to you. Did Yeji finally fill him in on what she’s been doing behind his back? You don’t say anything but, you can feel how much he needs you and unfortunately, you aren’t going to let him down. You follow him out of the university and over to where his motorcycle is parked. You watch as he crawls onto his bike and without hesitation you get on the back, grabbing onto his waist. It feels good being this close to him again and you can no longer deny it.

He drives to the mall, finds a parking spot, and you both get off. You find it odd that he brought you here of all places to talk, especially about a subject so serious as Yeji cheating on him. But you don’t question him yet, instead, you follow him inside the department store, immediately walking to the perfume counter. 

“What do you need my advice on?” you finally ask, not being able to stand the suspense any longer.

Donghyuck looks at you for a few seconds before turning to look at the displays. “I need help picking out a gift for Yeji. She’s been so wonderful to me lately and I really want to show her my appreciation,” he explains.

“Why wouldn’t you have your friends help you with this?” you snap.

“Can’t you do something nice for me?” he smiles. “Please just help me, I’m awful with this stuff.”

“Why would you think that I’d want to fucking help with this?” you huff, instantly realizing how that statement must’ve sounded. “I mean why would you think that I know anything about perfume and shit?”

“Well, you always smell so good,” he smiles.

That comment is so hard for you to process. You want to be happy that he thinks you smell good but at the same time, you can’t forget he just wants his girlfriend to smell like you. You turn to look at the display, “fine,” you sigh. “Let’s just do this quickly 'cause I have other things to do.”

You pick up a bottle, attempting to hand it to him. “You can spray it on your wrist to smell it,” you explain. When he doesn’t take the bottle, you roll your left sleeve up and spray the perfume on your own wrist. “I like this one,” you say as you smell your wrist. “It smells nice.”

He grabs your arm, bending down to smell it too. “It does smell good,” he smiles at you.

You quickly pull your arm away from him, “what’s wrong with you? I said spray it on your wrist to smell it.”

“Geez, I don’t know why you’re so pissy today,” he huffs, grabbing the bottle from you. “I guess I’ll take this one.” He examines the perfume for a few seconds, then glances at you. “But Yeji doesn’t spray perfume on her wrist, I’m not sure if it will smell the same.”

“Where does she spray it?” you ask.

He doesn’t respond, he looks at you then back at the bottle of perfume in his hand, clearly contemplating his next move. He sprays the perfume onto your neck, leaning in to smell you. You freeze by his sudden action. Having his head this close to you, feeling his breath on your neck drives you insane and you hate it. You loathe how something so small can make your heart rate increase so much. 

He pulls away with a smile on his face, “Yeah this does smell great. This perfume is perfect.” You watch him, speechless, as he places the sample perfume back on the shelf and picks up one inside of a box. 

“Yea, you like the way it smells on someone else,” you huff. Without thinking you grab a different bottle of perfume and spray him with it. 

“What the hell, Y/N,” he gasps.

You move closer to him, “this one smells nice too.” you smile.

“You're unbelievable,” he scoffs with a stupid smile on his face.

Donghyuck pays for the perfume and the two of you walk out of the mall together, heading for where his motorcycle is parked. “Thank you so much for this,” he smiles. “This is a special gift. It’s actually for our third year anniversary. I’ve been saving up my money so I can get Yeji something really nice. I’ve been working for my dad every chance I have to earn extra cash…but it’s going to be so worth it. Because she treats me so well and takes such good care of me and I never get her anything this nice…Do you think she’s going to like it?”

You can’t take it any longer. You try so hard to keep your mouth shut, you don't want to be the one to have to tell him what was going on but you could feel the word vomit building up in the back of your throat. “She...,” you start, staring intently at the ground. “She likes someone else.”

“What?” Donghyuck asks as the smile drops from his face.

“I saw her getting into another man’s car,” you start.

He shakes his head in disbelief, “maybe he’s just a friend of hers.”

“A friend that also kisses her,” you sigh.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” he snaps. “Yeji would never do that to me.”

“Do you think I’m lying?” you ask, surprised that he doesn’t believe you.

“Yea, I do,” he states. “Show me some proof and then I’ll believe you.”

“My word alone isn’t enough for you?” you ask.

He stares at you for a few seconds, biting his lip out of irritation. “I see what’s going on here,” he says. “You can’t break up Jisung and Karina so now you’re trying to fuck up my relationship.”

“You’re talking out of your ass,” you scoff, hurt by his words.

“And to think, I thought you and I could be friends,” Donghyuck hisses.

“Fine,” you snap. “I’m sorry that I can’t be a good friend to you.”

“I’m done with you,” Donghyuck growls. “From this point on I want absolutely nothing to do with you. You are dead to me.”

Your face starts to get hot, and you can feel the tears forming in the corners of your eyes. You have so many things that you want to say but you don’t want him to see you cry. You shake your head in dismay, turning to walk out of the parking garage. You get a taxi home, racing to your dorm, slamming the door behind you. You are infuriated, enraged, and if you want to be completely honest with yourself, you are also slightly heartbroken. 

You throw your bag down onto the floor before taking a seat at your desk. How could he not believe you? You have absolutely no reason to lie to him, especially about something like this. How could he think this low of you?

You pull your phone out of your pocket, opening the camera roll. You push play on the last video that you recorded.

“Don’t you think you should give me something before going into your room?” Hyunseung asked.

“Ok fine,” Yeji nodded, leaning in to kiss his cheek. “Go home, now.”

The video ends. There it is, the proof Donghyuck was demanding. Why didn’t you just show him the video? You hit the share button and begin typing in ‘PAIN IN THE ASS’. When Donghyuck’s picture pops up, you stare for a few seconds, contemplating if you should hit send. You exhale slowly, disconcerted by the decision you already decided on. You hit delete and confirm the action, dropping your phone onto your desk.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟸 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟷 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟹

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟸 : 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞'𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚖𝚎…

Donghyuck and his friends hung around the classroom after their class was dismissed to finish the group assignment.

“Ugggghhhh,” Jeno grunts, leaning onto his books in front of him on the table. “I’m freakin exhausted.”

“I need a break,” Mark adds.

“Let’s get something to eat,” Chenle suggests.

Everyone perks up in excitement. “Yea let’s go,” Soojin nods as she packs up her stuff.

“Wait,” Jaemin says. “You can’t go, Hyuck. You gotta finish your part.”

“What?” he asks, turning to look at his friend.

“Don’t act like we don’t know…” Soojin smiles, looking past Donghyuck to make eyes with Jaemin. “...that tonight you’re going out to celebrate your anniversary with Yeji. Finish your part, no breaks for you.”

Everyone nods in agreement. 

“Can’t you do it for me?” Donghyuck begs Jeno.

“Nah,” Chenle interrupts. “We’re single and we're just being petty since we’re obviously envious of your amazing relationship.”

“Let’s go,” Mark yells standing up and rushing out of the classroom while the others follow.

Donghyuck watches as all of his abandon him, all of them except Jisung. 

“Aren’t you going to go with them?” Donghyuck asks.

“Nah, I’m not worn out yet,” Jisung sighs. “I figured I’d stay and help you.”

Donghyuck smiles at his friend before sitting up in his chair to get ready to focus on his work.

“So…did you get Yeji a present yet?” Jisung wonders, nonchalantly.

“Yeah of course I did,” Donghyuck smiles, proudly.

Jisung watches his friend for a moment, sighing before looking down at his book. “You two have been together for three years now, right?” he asks.

“Mhm,” Donghyuck nods, leaning back in his chair. “Wow, three years, who would have thought we’d make it this long?”

“Time really flies,” Jisung adds. “I know that you love her a lot.”

Donghyuck looks at his friend gravely, noticing that Jisung is acting a little out of character. He knew his friend for a long time and he was able to tell when he had something on his mind.

“And you and I have been friends for a very long time,” he adds, pausing for a moment before continuing. “I think I need to tell you something.”

Donghyuck raises an eyebrow, “what are you trying to say, Sung?”

Jisung leans back, avoiding eye contact with his friend, reasoning with himself in his mind. He picks his phone up, opens up the gallery, and hands it to his friend. “Here see for yourself,” he sighs, knowing he is about to crush his best friend.

Donghyuck pushes play and watches a recording of Yeji climbing into a white Mercedes and a handsome man bending over to kiss his beloved girlfriend before getting into the driver’s seat.

“The other night I took Karina to that new bar that just opened. My father texted me and asked me to call him because he had to talk to me about something really important so I went outside to talk in private, and that’s when I just happened to see them,” Jisung explains, placing a comforting hand onto his friend’s shoulder. 

Donghyuck thinks about how you tried to tell him the same thing but he refused to believe you. He instantly feels awful for the things that he called you. He realizes how unfairly he treated you and knows what he has to do. 

“I’m really sorry man,” Jisung sighs.

Donghyuck stands up, “I gotta go talk to her.”

“Yea, I’ll finish this,” Jisung nods. 

“Thank you,” he says, rushing out of the classroom. He heads straight to the dorm building where Yeji and you both live. As he walks down the hallway towards her room, all the excuses that she had used were running through his mind. All the times she had blown him off for ‘school work’. Was everything a lie? Did she love him at all?

He walks by your door, stopping in front. He knows he needs to talk to you too, he owes you an apology but he can’t deal with that now. Donghyuck shakes it off and continues walking to the next room, pausing to exhale slowly before entering.

He walks inside her dorm and it was completely dark. He walks towards the bed, taking his bag off of his shoulder and tossing it onto her desk chair. Donghyuck sighs, assuming she’s too busy with her other boyfriend to remember that today is their anniversary.

All of a sudden the twinkle lights around the room turn on, startling Donghyuck out of his deep thoughts. “Happy anniversary baby,” Yeji yells, running out of the kitchen. She is carrying a heart-shaped cake with a lit number three candle on top.

Donghyuck stares at her, showing little to no emotion. “Isn’t this just the cutest little cake, baby? I made it myself” she announces. “Blow out the candle.”

He bends over to blow out the candle still unable to speak. Yeji places the cake on her desk then turns back to look at him.

“Awwwww what’s with this face, Hyuckie,” she asks, lightly placing both of her hands on his cheeks. “You thought I forgot, didn’t you? I know I’ve been very busy lately but I could never forget our anniversary.”

He still isn’t able to find the right words to say. Looking at her in this moment makes it so hard to believe that she’s actually do something like that to him. “I love you, Hyuck,” she smiles, brightly.

He stares, fighting back the tears he can feel starting to form in his eyes. “Yeji,” he finally manages to get out. “I…”

“Yes, baby?” she continues smiling, eagerly waiting to hear what he had to say.

Donghyuck suddenly bends over, and grabs his bag off of the desk chair. “I have this,” he states, pulling out a white box with a pretty pink bow on top. “A gift for you, Yeji.”

“A gift for me?” she repeats, bouncing up and down in excitement. She removes the lid, exposing the perfume that you helped him pick out. “This is amazing. Thank you, babe,” she places the perfume onto the desk next to the cake that she made then runs to him, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Thank you so much, my boyfriend is the best.”

At that moment, he decides that tonight isn’t the right time to bring anything up. She clearly loves him and he still loves her. 

When it’s time for bed, Donghyuck goes out onto the balcony to get some fresh air. He knows he won’t be able to sleep, not with everything that is running through his head.

Yeji walks out, hugging him from behind, “aren’t you sleepy?” He turns to look at her as she grabs both of his hands. “I can’t believe it’s already been three years. Time really flies, doesn’t it?”

“Mhm,” Donghyuck responds, the only response he was able to say the entire evening.

“Thank you, Donghyuck,” she continues. “For taking such good care of me. I know I can be a handful at times. I’m so lucky that I have you.”

“Maybe actually…” he starts. “You’re unlucky…I come from a poor family, have no future, and no car. Someone else might be able to take better care of you.”

“Why are you saying this?” she pouts. “No one else would put up with me like you do.”

“Mhm,” he nods.

“Well, I’m going to try to get some sleep baby,” she says, kissing him on the cheek. “You should probably try to sleep soon too.”

“Mhm,” he responds again.

Yeji goes back inside, falling asleep instantly when she lays down on her bed. He stays on the balcony for a little longer before wandering back inside of her room. He sits on the sofa that she has made up for him to sleep on, watching as she sleeps peacefully. Her phone starts vibrating on the nightstand, catching his attention. He knows he shouldn’t but he can’t resist, he grabs her phone reading the incoming messages from ‘Seungie’. He is in total disbelief at what he is reading. He opens her phone and continues to read through their prior messages. He places her phone back onto the nightstand, stands up, and walks out of the dorm. Walking past your room, he pauses, lifting his hand up to knock on your door but stops himself. He turns, continuing to leave the building. 

Once outside thunder sounds out from above which means the rain would start in no time but he doesn’t notice nor care at this point. He finds himself leaning against a bridge railing as the rain drips over him, soaking his clothing.

Drenched, he raises his head seeing you standing in front of him, holding an umbrella. You move closer so he would also be under the protection of the umbrella, “When I got home from the laundromat I saw someone walking around in the hallway. I thought maybe that person would need his umbrella back.”

Donghyuck stares at the ground, holding back the tears. He looks at you through his eyelashes, “Jisung saw Yeji with another guy. He recorded it to show me. I should’ve believed you when you told me. I’m such an idiot.”

“Don’t worry about it,” you say. “I can’t really blame you for not believing me.” Donghyuck doesn’t speak, he stares at you with tear-filled eyes.

“Here’s your umbrella,” you say, handing it over so he can grab it. “Well, I’m gonna go home now.”

When you turn to leave, Donghyuck panics. He doesn’t want you to leave, he wants you to stay with him. He grabs your hand, pulling you back towards him. “Stay with me, please,” he begs. “I was going to confront Yeji with everything tonight but when I saw her smile and her acting like nothing happened. I was speechless. I couldn’t help but think that maybe I was the one to blame. I don’t do that much for her and I’m always busy. So I just chose to stay silent. But then she fell asleep and I saw the texts he’s been sending her. She tells him the same things that she tells me. I saw the photos they sent each other, some of those are on the bed where I sleep. The smile she gives me isn't mine anymore. She’s giving it to him now too…I don’t know why this hurts so much.”

Something snaps in your mind and you start thinking irrational. You lean in, pressing your lips against his for a few seconds before saying, “When you’re with me, don’t think about her.”

He stares into your eyes and slowly inches closer until your lips meet again.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

𝙳𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 - 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟹 - 𝙷𝚊𝚎𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗 𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚜

𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟸 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚌𝚑.𝟷𝟺

𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝟷𝟹 : 𝚙𝚞𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚑𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚕

You sit on the sofa in your dorm, dressed for bed, rubbing lotion on yourself when Donghyuck walks out of the bathroom now in his pajamas. He walks over, and sitting down on the sofa next to you. “Look at how you do this,” he says while grabbing your arm and the bottle of lotion from you. “Let me do it.”

He gently rubs the lotion onto both of your arms and hands. You can’t deny how good it feels but you’re not going to let him know. “You’re doing it the same as me,” you note, not pulling away. 

“I’m not making a mess like you did,” he states, lifting your hand up to his face, smelling your skin. “You smell good.”

He smiles at you then smells your wrist, after your wrist he moves up a few inches and smells there. And then another inch and another. Finally he stops to make eye contact, “why is it that the higher I go, the better you smell?”

He is so cute, how could you have ever hated the adorable man in front of you? He starts smelling your arm again, making you smile. You finally pulled your arm back fearful of where this simple activity is leading.

“You’ve been staying here a lot lately,” you say. “Aren’t you going to get in trouble?”

Donghyuck looks down at the floor for a second then back at you. “Didn’t you tell me, that when I’m with you, I’m not supposed to think about her?” he asks.

He is right, you did tell him that, and you don’t know why you even asked him that in the first place. “I’m sorry,” you sigh.

“It’s whatever, let’s just get some sleep,” he smiles.

“Don’t you want some lotion?” you ask.

“I’m putting some on right now,” he says, rubbing his hands together. You bite your lip as you rub a glob of lotion onto his upper arm, in a playful manner, making him smile at you.

“Come on,” he says. “Seriously, let’s just get some sleep.”

“Alright,” you pout as you stand up and crawl into your bed. He lays down on the sofa exhaling obnoxiously loud. When he doesn’t get a response, he rolls over exhaling again, this time even louder. You watch him as he tosses and turns, feeling guilty for making him sleep on the sofa when you have a huge bed all to yourself.

“Does your back hurt from sleeping there?” you ask.

Donghyuck quickly sits up to look at you with a giant smile on his face, “if I say it does, will you let me sleep in your bed?”

“If it’s just sleeping,” you sigh, trying to sound firm.

He crawls onto your bed like a tiger stalking his prey. His body is on top of yours only a blanket preventing you from feeling the warmth of his skin. His face is only inches from yours, you can feel his breath on your face. 

“Tell me,” he says, “what are you scared of?”

“I’m not afraid,” you smirk. “But a guy like you, can’t do anything to me unless I’m drunk.”

“But you’re not drunk now,” he states, slowly leaning his face closer to yours. He gently touches your nose with his as he inches closer. Your heart starts beating faster, you feel like it’s going to pop out of your chest. The moment before your lips finally meet, you quickly turn over avoiding contact.

“Ok it’s time to sleep,” you say. You continue to lay in the middle of the bed with no intention of moving.

“Where am I going to sleep?” he asks.

“Right there,” you point to the small space behind your back.

“That small space?” he wonders, surprised.

“Mhm,” you nod. “Or do you prefer the sofa?”

“Damn,” he groans, lying down in the small space that you designated for him to sleep. “Even the sofa has more space than this.”

“Goodnight,” you whisper, turning the light next to your bed off.

Donghyuck rolls over, resting his chin on your shoulder, “Tonight, can we spoon, Y/N?”

“It’s the only thing you can do,” you whisper.

He quickly wraps his arms around you and throws his top leg over your lower body. Your heart racing again. Damn it, why does it keep doing that?

“I won’t ask for permission if I decide to do more,” he whispers, squeezing your body tightly.

You open your eyes, blinking a few times trying to adjust to the sunlight coming in from the window. You look around and don’t see Donghyuck. You hate it when he leaves without waking you up but today feels worse. You were hoping to wake up to him still holding you tight. But this is YOUR life and unfortunately YOUR life isn’t a great romance novel.

“Breakfast is served,” he announces, walking into the room from the kitchen holding a tray of food. He proudly places the tray over your lap and takes a seat on the bed in front of you. 

You glance down, “is this edible?” you asks with a giant smile.

“My mother is a trained chef,” he boasts, scooping up a spoonful of oatmeal with a spoon, wanting to feed it to you.

You smile slightly, before opening your mouth. He watches you patiently as you chew and swallow the mouthful of food. “Good, isn’t it?” he asks.

“Well…it’s ok,” you sigh.

He smiles knowing that you actually mean it’s delicious but of course you don’t want to seem to excited. He’s starting to figure you out and he loves it.

“Next time,” he starts. “You cook for me.”

You looked down at the tray of food, “do you think I can cook?” you ask.

“Even if it’s a cup of instant noodles,” Donghyuck adds.

“Anybody can cook instant noodles,” you argue.

“But whoever does,” he says, looking at you with only his eyes. “It wouldn’t be the same as the ones made by you.”

You smile shyly. That is really cute. How can he be so smooth? You tend to get a little uncomfortable in these kinds of situations. You awkwardly look around trying to think of what to say next, when his phone starts to vibrate on the nightstand. You look and see Yeji’s name, bringing you back to reality. What are you doing? He is technically hers even if she’s cheating on him. He grabs his phone, then looks at you, unsure if he should answer it.

“Go ahead, answer it,” you sigh. “What if it’s an emergency?”

Donghyuck nods and answers the phone leaning on the doorway while you continue to eat while listening intently. 

“Yes Yeji?” he says. “Oh I’m at…Jaemin’s,” he lies, going into the bathroom and closing the door. 

You have an awful feeling inside of your chest. You aren’t sure what this feeling is but you definitely do not like it. You lay back in your bed, thinking about everything. You grab your phone, posting some of your thoughts on your story on instagram.

You ride to the university on the back of Donghyuck’s bike. He parks it in his usual spot. You climb off and take off your helmet, waiting to hand it to him once he is off. 

Donghyuck’s friends are sitting at the picnic table that’s almost directly in front of your parking spot. Chenle notices when you two pull up on his bike, hitting mark to show him.

“Woah woah woah, look at this,” Mark yellsw, getting you and Donghyuck to look in their direction.

You both are shocked once you realize you have an audience.

“You two are always together lately,” Chenle says, with a shit eating grin on his face.

“Well…uh…” Donghyuck panics, looking at you then quickly back at his friends. “We practically live in the same dorm, is it really that strange?”

“It wouldn’t be strange if Y/N didn’t post something like this,” Mark announces, holding his phone up with his hand.

“Right?” Mark agrees.

“Huh? What did she post?” Donghyuck asks.

You are speechless, you didn’t realize any of them follow you. Why are you always so stupid? Donghyuck looks at you for an answer, slightly panicking.

“If you’re upset about anything, Y/N. You can always call and talk to me,” Jaemin offers.

“No, I just…I was upset over a show I was watching last night,” you lie, proudly. 

“Wait a minute,” Chenle objects. “You were upset over a show you watched last night but only posted about it this morning.”

“Is it the show I was telling you about?” Soojin asks.

“Um yea,” you quickly nod.

“I knew you would like it,” Soojin smiles.

“Well…” you stumble for words, looking at Donghyuck then quickly turning to face everyone else. “I’m gonna go to my class.”

“Go get em,” Mark teases as you run off towards the university.

Donghyuck pulls his phone out looking at the post being discussed. “Will the punishment in hell for adultery be too painful?” he reads to himself.

𝚙𝚛𝚎𝚟 | 𝚖𝚊𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 | 𝚗𝚎𝚡𝚝

𝚝𝚊𝚐𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚝 𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗

@lostinneocity

haechan — settle down (rockstar hyuck) | part 1 of 2

wc: 22k (!!!!!!!) genre: angst, smut (18+ minors dni), fluff warnings: loss of virginity, very soft sex (hand-holding during sex), lots of kissing, protected sex, haechan fucks...a lot, fingering, oral (f receiving), very faint corruption kink, JEALOUSY, possessiveness (marking, signing on your body), handjob, car sex, cumplay, spit, exhibitionism (!), slight dumbification, slight degradation, titty-sucking etc, sweet aftercare a/n: i worked a lot on this and i really hope u like it.... i really hope it's hot... i hope u like rockstar haechan...please let me know what u think... (fic playlists) | browse the fic tag :)

he's been staring at you all night.

the bass thrums insistent in your chest, overriding your heartbeat, as you cling onto the barrier between the stage and the crowd. lights flash before your eyes, almost blinding you with how fast they blinked, and you can barely make out the faces of the boys onstage as they play their last song of the night. the air is damp, excitement riding high over the crowd in waves of endless screams that never seem to stop. 

and the boy on the far right, fingers moving deftly over the strings of his electric guitar, hasn't taken his eyes off you for the last five minutes. 

a sharp smile tugs at his lips, smokey makeup making his gaze ever more piercing as he looks down at you through his overgrown bangs, hairs at the nape of his neck unruly and wild. the lights throw the features of his face into high contrast, the tattoos curling on his neck and hip screaming for attention, as do the glint of jewelry scattered everywhere on his body. you feel smaller and smaller under his gaze, something lewd about the way he runs his tongue over his lips, eyes practically undressing you. he never seemed to stop moving his body as he played, bouncing on his toes or letting his body lean away from the sound, the music fuelling and becoming one with his movements as if he were a dancer.

as the music crashes and swells towards the end of his solo, his eyes slide over to yours with a practiced precision, as if he had memorized your position in the crowd. swaying his hips from side to side, his eyelids droop just slightly into a half-lidded stare, as he ruts his hips playfully against his guitar. 

the screams of the other fans are deafening, but you can hardly hear it over the rush of your heartbeat in your own ears.

haechan finally looks away, a small smile on his face as he signals to his bandmates towards the song's ending. you feel almost empty as the weight of his attention lifts off of you, pressing yourself up against the railing on tip-toe to try and catch his eye again before sinking down and feeling like an idiot. 

he was just doing fanservice for an audience member, nothing more. you try not to find his actions endearing as he slings his arm around the lead singer, mark, his surprisingly boyish laugh making your heart flutter in your chest as he waves towards his fans one more time. 

people are leaving the venue, the sounds of their excitement getting further and further away, but you stand there, reeling, clutching onto the metal barrier, sure that if you took your hands off it you would fall. finally, glancing up at the stage one last time, you're just about to leave to find your friend, the only reason you were even here, when –

"leaving so soon?" 

the boy is sitting on the stage right in front of you, leaning forward so you can see his face clearly. up close, he's even prettier than before, delicate almost doll-like legs wrapped under ripped skinny jeans, leading up to thick and toned thighs, his slender waist shadowed under his large leather jacket ridden with buckles and straps. without the bright stage lights, you can see the moles on his skin, tracing a dangerous path under the collar of his shirt. 

at your lack of response, he raises his eyebrows. "i asked if you were leaving, princess." 

"i have to find my friend," the words come out rushed. "um…jaemin? your band hired him tonight as the photographer." 

"i remember," he nods. "so…you're not a fan?" 

"no." he nods, silence filling the space between the both of you. you can see him start to formulate a goodbye, his heart-shaped lips parting, but you don't want the conversation to end, you don't want him to stop looking at you. "- but…i really enjoyed your show." 

he looks a little surprised, and a genuine smile spreads sweetly across his face. "why?" he challenges. 

"what?" 

"what did you like about our show?" his eyes glint, and you know he's teasing you. 

"the songs were good," you mumble. 

"yeah?" he licks his lips, a slight hint of nervousness showing on his face as he clears his throat. "who was your favorite member?" 

"huh?" 

"your favorite band member," he repeats, tilting his head to the side. "jeno, he's our drummer, mark's the lead singer, jisung plays bass and i…" he waves his hand absentmindedly towards his guitar, on the stand, still onstage behind him. "i'm haechan," he adds. 

if you wanted to get to know him, it wouldn't hurt to show a little of exactly how much you liked him, would it? "you were my favorite," you admit. "you…you have really good stage presence," you blurt out. 

"stage presence?" 

"yeah. when i'm in the crowd…i can't really pay attention to anything else. and you…" you swallow, heat burning up your cheeks, but the way his eyes were looking at you with curiosity making you finish your thought. "you make the audience feel like they want to please you." the unspoken truth, that you, as part of the audience, wanted to please him, hangs in the air. 

your embarrassment, at saying something so suggestive and raw, is quickly washed away by the smile tugging at the corner of his lip, a smirk that quickly spreads across his face into a grin. you're so mesmerized by it, that you're taken aback by the way he suddenly shifts, hopping down the stage lightly and standing in front of you. 

"princess," he says, softly, placing his hands on the railing next to yours so the sides of your fingers barely brush. "do you want to come to a party?" 

you resist the urge to immediately say yes. "what party?" 

"there's one after every show. jaemin will have been invited, he can take you." the venue has emptied out, even his bandmates have left the stage. and yet, his voice is pitched low as he leans in, body warmth radiating off of him, and you are so close, you can see the smudged eyeliner on his lower lash line, can make out the grey of his colored contact lenses. "you can find me there." 

"but…" you feel lost. "why can't you just take me?" 

"if we show up together, it'll seem a little like we're dating, no?" his voice is quiet, but firm. 

hurt and confusion blossoms in your chest. was it really that serious? keeping your voice as nonchalant as possible, you ask, "would that be so bad? for…for us to date?”

but you know it's the wrong thing to say. 

he exhales slowly, a brief look of pain flitting over his features. he hated doing this, hated reaching the point in conversations where rules and boundaries had to be discussed. nights where he found his girls at the party were the easiest, letting body language and long glances do the talking, as few strings attached as possible. 

but today he couldn't stop looking at you, in the front row, couldn't help sliding his eyes over and checking to see if you were watching him, a pleased thrum burning in his chest every time his gaze found yours. it seemed logical, to spend his time with you tonight. but if he'd known you'd felt like this, he never would have waited onstage. 

"what's your name, princess?" 

"y/n."

"y/n, i'm not making you my girlfriend," he states, bluntly. "i can't, and i don't want to. you can meet me at the party later, but we'll just fuck – nothing else." 

his words make you feel small, his tone harsh compared to his previous meandering way of speaking. even then, the thought of letting him walk away, to never see him again, to end this story on this moment, made you feel worse than anything.  

at the look on your face, he softens slightly. 

"i'm sorry if you thought this was going to be more," he says, quietly. "you don't have to do anything you don't want to." 

"i do," you correct him. frustrated, he sighs, and you rush to clarify. "i'll meet you at the party. just…nothing else." your end off hesitantly, unwilling to echo his crude words.

"are you sure?" you think you see his gaze darken, the tension suddenly heightening as he places one of his large hands over your own. his guitar-calloused fingertips are rough as they slide against the back of your hand, drawing shapes that burn into your skin like tattoos. you nod, but he shakes his head — slowly, sweetly patient. "i need to hear you say it," he murmurs, and the words go straight to your gut. 

"i'm sure." your voice comes out as a whisper, but he doesn't seem to mind. he leans in, and just when you think your lips are going to meet, your mouth parting expectantly, he tilts his head and kisses you softly on your cheek. 

"make sure no one sees you, princess," he murmurs, low in your ear, before straightening up. "don't make me wait too long, hm?" 

—

"did anyone follow you up here?" 

haechan sits with his legs hanging off the edge of the roof, arms slung over one of the lower rungs of the railing. he doesn't spare you a glance as he takes another drink from his bottle of red wine, knowing that you're hanging onto his every word. 

"no," you reply, voice barely louder than a whisper. you repeat yourself again, louder, hating the way your voice shakes with hesitance. "no, i don't think so." 

he exhales, shrugging off the leather jacket that hangs large over his frame, his shoulderblades moving under his white shirt, veiny arms pushing the bottle to the side as he shifts himself backwards fluidly so he's further away from the ledge, his long legs stretched out. 

"well?" and now he turns to look at you, dark eyes framed with makeup searching for yours, his gaze heavy. the piercing on his eyebrow glints in the moonlight, and when he leans his weight back on his hands, his shirt rides up so that you can see just the hint of a tattoo curling low on his hip. "are you ready?" 

feet unsteady, you shuffle over to him, standing over him as he watches you through hooded eyes. unsure, you start to sit down next to him, but a hand quickly reaches out to touch your knee, dragging his touch up the back of your thigh, the cold scrape of his rings on your skin feeling rough and claiming all at once. his lips part almost mockingly, commanding you without words to stop. 

he flicks his gaze down to his lap, eyes flickering back up to yours. eyebrows raised, as if in a challenge.

slowly, you lower yourself onto his lap, hands hesitantly grasping for his shoulders. his arms come to steady your waist, slipping under your shirt and touching bare skin, feeling the way your body shifts and moves. it's only because your body is pressed up against his, his hands are roaming up and down your thighs, that he notices something which makes him halt his movements, licking his lips. 

"you're shaking," he murmurs, now brushing the hair out of your eyes, tucking a strand behind your ear as he studies you, taking in the way you're all tensed up, the uncomfortable way your legs are folded, goosebumps erupting every time his fingertips brushed your skin, muscles trembling.

you swallow. "i've never done this before," you admit. 

his eyes widen, now removing his hands from you entirely, letting them fall. "you're a virgin?" 

you nod, heart pounding in your chest. he's looking away, his jaw set, his gaze hardened. did he hate that you had no experience? or would he enjoy that? "i can…" the words come out in a jumble, "you can teach me, i want… i want to-" 

"no." with surprising gentleness, he motions for you to move off his lap, and you follow his actions mindlessly, docile under his touch. 

"do you think i won't be good enough?" you ask, hating the way your voice comes out wounded and achy, hating how weak he made you. 

he pauses, tongue poking into the side of his cheek, and you think you can see a flash of something deep in his eyes. 

"y/n…i can't be your first time." 

"but i want –" 

"you need to be with someone who will take care of you." despite his words, his voice is cold, and clear. "i don't do that." he dusts off his jacket, shrugging it back on as he takes another drink from the bottle, eyes closed, unwilling to look at you for another second. "go home, y/n. i'll see you at the next show." 

you don't move. you kneel there, next to him, eyes desperately searching for his. 

"go home, y/n," he repeats, harshly. 

"i want to stay here," you bite back, stubbornly, hurt making your voice brittle. 

"then you'll have to watch me fuck someone else." lazily, he reaches into the pocket of his jacket for his phone, and you can see him scroll through his messages, faces and names blurring as you barely decipher him type out another message. his fingers moving across the keyboard, as the anonymous responder sends a series of heart emojis, eagerness palpable through the screen. he locks his phone, the click sound startling you out of your daze, and he puts his phone down on his lap, the action somehow mocking.

"so?" he's still not looking at you, staring straight ahead into the night. "do you want to watch?" 

and as you make your way down the stairs, shame burning at your neck and tears burning hot down your cheeks, you can swear you feel his eyes follow you all the way down. 

—

the feeling of embarrassment curdles in your stomach, and leaves a sour taste in your mouth every time you look in the mirror. it's what leads you to skip the next show, making an excuse to jaemin about 'having other plans'. and then the other, and then the other. and then it's been a week, and your friend has finally managed to drag you to one of their after-parties, pushing you through the door with a little too much enthusiasm. he knows something is bothering you, and he wants nothing more than to help take your mind off of it — but he has no idea that the something is currently leaning against the archway leading off into the living room, nursing a bottle of beer in his hands, and brushing his hands around some girl's waist in a way that made you feel sick. 

jaemin introduces you to mark, out on the balcony. mark is sweet, and friendly, a regular boy-next-door who happens to have face gems twinkling next to his eyes and leather pants tight around his thighs. he asks you about college, and work. he talks about the songs he's writing on his guitar. he catches your drink when you almost drop it over the railing, an easy smile on his face when his fingers brush yours passing it back to you, and a shy grin when he reaches out to lace his fingers with yours properly.

"i'm really busy, but i'd love to talk to you more," he says, sincerely, as he takes your phone from your hands to key in his number. he texts himself so his contact is at the top of your messages, making you promise to text him when you get back. he looks at you meaningfully, squeezing your hand before dropping it to go back to his party. 

there's a moment, where you think to follow. 

but then all of it – every touch, every glance, every speck of light you counted reflected in marks' wide eyes, — all of it is wiped clean the moment you hear a familiar low voice.

"trying to get with my friends now, princess?" 

when the light illuminates his silhouette, hurt registers before anything else. 

hickeys bloom across the side of haechan's neck, trailing down to his chest. only a simple mesh top lies underneath his leather jacket, and you can see the shadows of a few more bruises on his torso when his arm shifts, tugging the jacket open just slightly. his hair is a mess, tugged this way and that by desperate hands, and you think there may be a smear of bright pink lipstick at the corner of his lips. you can smell the reek of flowery perfume, cloyingly sweet, all over his clothes, as he leans back against the railing, eyes turned towards the party happening behind the sliding glass doors.

"i thought you said i was your favorite band member," he murmurs, a mock expression of sadness on his face. "mark's nothing like me." 

"why do you care?" you will yourself to sound more confident, letting the hurt dissolve into defiance. 

"i don't." the pout has melted off his face, a burning intensity now in the way he stares at you, making you shift uncomfortably. a moment passes, where he studies your face, eyes flicking across your features almost methodically. "so am i?" 

"what?" 

"am i still your favorite?" his voice is bitter, as if he knows the answer before asking and he doesn't like it. 

"are you seriously asking me that?" 

"princess –"

he's interrupted by a chime from your phone. the both of you glance down at it at the same time, the text and the sender unmistakeable on your otherwise empty lockscreen. 

mark <3 : thanks for talking to me today :) let me know when you get home safe! 

there's a pause. 

"mark has a girlfriend," haechan blurts out, his voice coarse. 

"what?" you look up at him, trying to figure out if this was a joke, but his face is impassive. 

"he cheats on her all the time with girls from his parties. it's his thing." haechan's still looking at your screen even though your phone has turned off, resolutely not meeting your eyes. 

it takes you a moment to gather yourself, every one of mark‘s actions and words suddenly flashing before you like a flipbook, sweet memories crumpling into dust. "are you lying?" you ask, shakily. 

"why would i?" he finishes his beer, veins shifting on the back of his hand as he crushes the empty can, the crunch of metal dissonant against the warm summer night. his next words are just as rough. "whether or not you get with mark means nothing to me. i don't care. i don't even know you." 

his words ring true, as he pushes off from the railing, leaving you alone on the balcony without another word. the abrupt end to the conversation has you turning, eyes following him as he steps back into the party, looking away a little too late as you see him gesture someone over with a flick of his fingers, her long hair covering both their faces when their lips meet. 

jaemin finds you crying on the balcony, but he can't figure out the reason. you delete mark's contact off your phone the moment you get home, and jaemin promises you he's never taking you to any other show or party with the band ever again. 

—

"there should be an empty room somewhere." the man lets go of your hand, at the foot of the stairs. "can you wait for me inside one? i'll find you in a minute." 

it's only when you're halfway upstairs, when you realise that you're really about to give yourself to a stranger for your first time. 

he has a bright smile, sweet dimples showing each time his lips turn upwards, each time he calls you baby. he's not much older than you, but there's an easy authority in the way he takes your cup from your hands and tells you to stop drinking, getting you glasses of water instead. his body dwarfs yours in size, and when you put your hand on his thigh, you see something shift in his expression that tells you he may not be as gentle as he seems. 

and when you tell him he'll be your first time, his throat bobs as he swallows, eyes dragging up and down your body with a newfound hunger. 

you've never really cared about who you lost your virginity to, not considering it a big occassion or anything to make a fuss over. your mind flits back to two weeks ago, when some boy had cared way more about it than you did. 

"you need to be with someone who will take care of you." 

anger flares in your chest at the thought of it, as you climb up the stairs two steps at a time, and it's just when you're just reaching the first landing, when you suddenly coming to a crashing halt because —

the sound of microphone feedback makes you put your hands over your ears, instinctively, the shrill sound piercing the air. 

a loud bass suddenly starts up, vibrating under your feet. did they hire a live band? the song that booms from downstairs is familiar, and with a jolt, you realise that you know it a little too well. 

that honey-sweet voice, the bitter bite to his words soothed over by the sweetest of tones – drifts up from the speaker, a haunting melody that echoes up the empty staircase, punctuated by a screaming crowd.

as if to further prove it was him, he lets out a laugh at the end of his line, the tone of it dark and sarcastic, the crowd going wild at the sound of it. 

was it a studio recording? it must be, because there was no way this band was downstairs, performing live at this random birthday party, there was no chance…

… except now mark is speaking into the microphone, greeting the audience, asking for the birthday girl. unease stirs in your stomach as you trace your steps back down, a dread that fills you up as the makeshift stage comes back into view, where the DJ had been just a moment ago. 

to where haechan stood, guitar on its stand, eyes already trained on yours, an expression of white hot anger on his face. 

—

"him? really?" 

you can still feel his touch on your arm, from how he dragged you into the bedroom. 

you're frozen on the steps. 

haechan signals to mark, ignoring the questioning looks from the members and protests from the boy as he steps off the platform, making a beeline for the stairs. his brows are furrowed, his teeth gritted as he glares at you. 

"you wanna go upstairs that bad?" he murmurs. "lead the fucking way, princess." 

he starts towards you, and you take a step back, body colliding with the door. the sound seems to ground him, and he takes a deep breath, trying to calm down, finally turning away to sit on the bed, the space allowing you to relax just slightly.

"i thought," he starts, patiently, swallowing hard. "i thought i told you to find someone to take care of you, for your first time."  

the reminder of his words feels like a stab in your chest. "i thought you didn't care," you shoot back. 

he ignores you. "did you come here with your friends? where's jaemin?" 

what the fuck was wrong with him? "who are you to tell me what to do?" 

his lips part, but no words come out. sighing, he rubs his face with his hands, still trying to calm down. "y/n," he starts again, voice pained. "i don't want to see you get hurt."

"how do you know he would've hurt me?" 

his eyes meet yours. "did you tell him?" he asks, quietly. 

"tell him i was a virgin? yes." anger seeps into your tone, as you glare at him. "he reacted very differently from you." 

"y/n that's not a good thing!" he stands up, his voice raised. "are you that desperate to get fucked?" 

you step back in alarm, tears forming in your eyes. fear, of the situation you almost put yourself in, of the boy in front of you, makes your throat close up, and you can't help the way your body tenses. the cruelness of his words settles in a little too late, an acidic burn in your chest. 

haechan feels the tips of his fingers go numb as you start to cry, guilt flooding his mind in a way he rarely felt. his face crumples, and he does't know what to do when you curl in on yourself, every sound you make feeling like a punch to his ribs.

"i'm sorry," he whispers, reaching for you tentatively. when you don't pull away, his arms circle around you, and he makes sure to leave enough space for you to breathe or break free if you wanted to. "i'm sorry," he repeats again, as you sink into his chest, needing his warmth as much as you hated his presence. 

"take it back," you mumble. "take it back right now."

"i take it back," he says, immediately. "i didn't mean any of it. i'm sorry." 

"you don't get to reject me," you start, voice shaky, "and control who i choose to be with."

he sucks in a breath, gripping onto you a little tighter. "y/n –" 

"it's…it's fucked up," you hiccup, fisting at the fabric of his shirt, crumpling it in your fists in frustration.

"i know," he breathes. "i know." 

his hand comes up to stroke your hair, and you hate how it really does manage to comfort you, your breaths steadying as he pats your back clumsily. when you think you've calmed down enough, you place your hands on his chest, and he backs away instinctively, looking down at his feet. never meeting your eyes.

"i'm tired, haechan," you whisper. "i don't want to play whatever game you're playing." he doesn't respond, so you continue. "you don't want to fuck me, but you don't want anyone else to." 

"i do." his response is so quiet, you barely catch it.

"you want other people to fuck me?" 

"no, i don't." he lifts his head, his expression conflicted. "i…i want to be your first time." 

"what?" 

when he doesn't respond, you sigh, agitated. "haechan, i already told you i don't want to play your games anymore –" 

"not a game," he cuts you off, softly. "i'll take care of you." the gentleness of his voice makes you feel small. it's almost overwhelming, the way he looks into your eyes, without his usual apathy and bitterness. 

"i thought you said you don't do that?" it takes you all your willpower to not give in. 

"i don't," he breathes. "but with you i will." he's starting to think he has no choice – that there's no one else in the world who's going to take care of you the way he knows you need. he doesn't know when he decided to give in, in between watching you place your hand on that man's thigh, and you standing in front of him now. all he knows is that he either had to do this, or make you disappear from his life entirely. 

the words hang in the air. even now, feeling so torn and hurt and tired, your body can't help how much you want him, hyper-attuned to the little details in his appearance: the messy black nail polish scrawled on his nails, smoky eye make-up that makes his gaze all the more intense and devouring. there's a heady smell hanging onto his skin and clothes, rich and indulgent vanilla and musk, filling up your senses with a giddy desire. long legs in a pair of ripped skinny jeans, his thighs stretching out the fabric in a way that almost looked like it hurt. 

"okay," you mumble. his lips part, but you answer him before he has a chance to ask. "please take care of me." your voice is small, yet each word seems to catch fire, incinerating the air between you. 

his tongue darts out, wetting his lip. "yeah?" 

you nod. finally giving in to the pull of your body, you take a step closer, looking up at him through your lashes. 

"i'm sorry…about all of it." he murmurs. "thank you for trusting me, still." 

you can't think of anything to say, so you nod again. it feels like your heart is in your throat. 

he swallows. "do you…you shouldn't…" his eyes dart around the room. "we shouldn't do it here. in…in some strangers bedroom." gently, he touches your arm, looking at you hesitantly. "would you feel comfortable if we did it in your apartment? or i could bring you to my shared apartment with the band…they wouldn't be back yet. but we might have to be quick…"

your head feels like it's spinning. 

at your lack of response, he rambles on, eyes focused on yours, trying to discern your thoughts. "w-what do you think? or…if you really want to get comfortable i don't mind booking a hotel, it's a little last minute but-" he bites his lip. "do you want to meet somewhere else or i could take you in my car? i haven't drank much, i swear, but if you don't trust me-" 

"stop," you blurt out. 

he freezes, the hand grazing your arm dropping to his side, fingers playing with the rips in his jeans. 

"i'm sorry," he says, softly.

"no, i mean…stop asking me questions." you exhale. "i trust you," you repeat, softly. every word of it was true — despite everything, you were still the same person sitting on his lap up on the rooftop. "just…take care of me, however you want." 

he swallows. "you sound…" exhaling, he shakes his head to clear it. "okay. is your apartment empty?" 

"yes," you whisper. "jaemin's away for tonight." 

"i'll drive," he murmurs. and now he takes a step closer to you, until he's all you can see, the room melting away. "but before that…can i kiss you first, princess?" you nod, transfixed by him, as he leans in. 

haechan kisses soft. 

his lips are plush, and soft, taking your bottom lip between his own sweetly. he tilts his head slowly as if he's afraid he'll overwhelm you by moving too fast, his lips parting as he invites you to do the same, his hands going to the back of your head to guide you. a soft sigh escapes the back of his throat when your lips part and he can taste you, and you can taste him — vanilla like how he smells, with the slight bite of alcohol. your hand comes up to touch his round cheeks, surprisingly soft too, and he smiles into this kiss. 

he's the one to break apart from you, with a patience that feels rehearsed. he's taking care of you, as he leans in so your noses brush, your breaths mingling. 

"haechan…" he hums, encouragingly. "i…you know this isn't…my first kiss, right?" 

a pause. "i know," he murmurs. 

"so… so you don't have to be gentle." you squirm slightly as his touch grows heavier, eyes darkening at the implications behind your words. 

he backs away from you, hands pulling you with him as he sits down on the bed. his eyes flick down to his lap as he lowers his gaze, before dragging them painstakingly up to yours again. 

"sit, princess." 

this time, when he feels you tremble against him, your knees caging in his hips as you straddle him, all he does is lean in and kiss you — just as sweet as he did the first time. 

"i'm gentle with you because i want to be," another kiss, his tongue sliding against your bottom lip. "not because i have to." his fingers guide your chin upwards, baring your neck to him as he leans in and leaves a kiss on a spot under your jaw. and then a longer, more lingering kiss. and now he's making his way down your neck, each press of his lips on your skin longer and rougher than the last, and now you're sure he's sucking marks onto your neck, especially when you feel a slight sting of teeth. 

you're shifting against him restlessly, body hardly your own as you fall under his touch. you don't know how long you spend there, in his lap, as he works on your neck, taking breaks to kiss you on the lips, his sighs echoing into the cavern of your mouth as it falls open with need. it's when he sucks lightly on your tongue, almost boyish in the way he backs away with a small smile, when a soft sound escapes your lips. 

"yeah?" he murmurs, leaning in again, letting the tip of his tongue brush against yours gently. "you like that?" 

you nod. 

"you sound so pretty," he breathes, as he slots his lips with yours again, humming against yours as you let out another small whimper. 

"haechan-" you mumble, and he draws away, looking at you expectantly. "i think i'm ready." 

"really?" his hands on your waist give you a light squeeze. "you want me to take you home now?" 

you're still giddy from the heat radiating off his skin, your lips craving his contact again now he's stopped kissing you. you nod, and he smiles, gently guiding you off his lap as he unlocks the door. 

he's gentle the whole way down – as he leads you away from the main staircase so you wouldn't be seen, the crowd still distracted by the band. he cradles you carefully against his side all the way out of the back gates and into his car, and when your breath catches as he leans over to buckle your seatbelt for you, he's gentle even as he presses into you for a spur of the moment kiss, tongue licking into your mouth with more fervor. 

it's not a song that plays in the car as he drives and you try to remember the way to your apartment, but rather it's a low and sultry beat — bluesy harmonies stretched out over pulses. part of you wonders if he played it on purpose, because imagining his voice set against it already had you melting against the leather seats.

it would all be rather sweet – how gentle he's being, the soft way he smiles at you in the dim lights of your lift lobby, the way he holds your hand and lets you lean against him as you head higher and higher, the space around you feeling like a vacuum of trapped adrenaline and lust. 

but there was also no denying the fact that he jolted at the slightest sound, his grip on you tight and slack all at once, the tenderness in his eyes here one second and gone the next. a hurt you could almost taste on your tongue, that you were holding onto something so fragile, and that to him it seemed the worst thing that could happen would be if he were found with you.

—

but all of it changes, when you're alone in your room. the weight of his attention, that you'd felt even as one person amidst a screaming crowd, seems to intensify tenfold as he lets his jacket slide to the floor, eyes on you. 

he reads the apprehension in your body, the way you hover near your bed, waiting for him to guide you. 

"let me know if it's too much, okay?" he murmurs, as he pulls you in for a hug first, feeling you warm against him as you cling on to his embrace. "you can tell me to stop whenever, and i will." his hands rub circles up your waist, teasing on the silver of skin between your top and your skirt. 

you nod, but he shakes his head – a thumb brushing across your cheek. 

"use your words," he murmurs. "so i know you mean it." 

"okay," you breathe, now guiding him to the bed yourself, curiosity getting the better of you. you had almost forgotten, in the midst of everything, why exactly you went to the party, and the familiar need sparks back to life in you. 

haechan sits down against the headboard, pulling you into his lap, the movement feeling even more natural now. he can see that you're nervous and eager at the same time, hands fumbling with the soft material of his shirt, unsure what to do as you shift around on top of him. 

"can i kiss you?" in the soft lamp light of the room, the sharp-cut edges of his face seem to blur, large doe-eyes looking up at you kindly. it makes you want to lean in, so you do — slotting your lips with his boldly, kissing him the way you wanted from him. it surprises him, the way you press your lips against him harshly, the gentle graze of your teeth against his plush lip. 

he lets out a small laugh, and kisses you back just as fiercely, the atmosphere in the room melting as temperature skyrockets, until it's almost unbearable to be separated from you by layers of fabric. 

"may i-" he mumbles, tugging at the hem of his own shirt, and when your voice chokes out an affirmative, he's quick to yank it over his head, movements rough, exposing beautiful skin, his body warm and solid under your palms as you lean into him. 

your cheeks warm, and he notices – a small smile on his face as his hands cup your cheeks, and he gives you a sweet kiss, abruptly different from the others. suddenly, it's almost too tender, the way he looks up at you with endearment in his eyes, kissing you chastely, and you sink into it a little guiltily, enjoying the innocence of it. 

when you feel your heart reach its boiling point, your own hands go to the hem of your shirt, and you pull it over your head. you don't mean to slow down your movements, not meaning to tease or entice, but the way his eyes darken looking at your body made you wish you did it on purpose. 

"pretty," he praises, head dipping to press a kiss between your collarbones. and another one, lower done, almost reaching your cleavage. the bra you had chosen mindlessly that morning was a thin bralette, and it did little to hide how aroused you were, your nipples poking stiff peaks through the fabric. 

but still, he doesn't make any move to remove it, peppering kisses on your bare chest, over the slope of your breasts, almost slobbering at your skin, lips dewy and wet. his arms are firm around you, meeting each one of your movements and steadying you, helping you rock your hips into him as desire surges in your body. 

"haechan, –" his name had never sounded so breathless falling from your lips.   

"yes, baby?" 

the term of endearment makes you feel smaller in his lap, the only thing making you feel better was the way he was just as heated as you, his breaths coming hard and fast. he wanted everything to be perfect, he never wanted to rush you into anything you weren't comfortable with, his hands staying firm on your lower back. 

you tug at the bralette covering your chest impatiently, the fabric never feeling more uncomfortable on your skin. 

"you want me to take it off?" he asks, head nuzzling into your neck as his fingers wander up your back. you feel it loosen around you, his finger expertly fiddling the clasp open, dragging it down and accidentally brushing against your hard nipples, making you hiss.

"i'll make you feel good," he promises, softly, lowering his head, kissing down the slope of your breasts. he makes eye contact with you, searching your eyes for any form of discomfort.

"be gentle," you murmur, nodding for him to continue. "they feel sensitive." 

"of course," he mumbles, before starting to lightly kitten-lick at your nipple, the feeling all at once new and arousing, making you pulse against him in his lap. he circles his tongue around your areola, being as gentle as possible, opting not to flick at your nipples but rather suck one into his mouth, heart-shaped full lips sinful against your chest. the heat between your legs is overwhelming, as he switches to your other side, his hand coming up to knead your breast, warm palms moving over skin and making you giddy. 

"please," you whimper, as he laps at you. "please, i need you, please –" 

"you have me," he murmurs, one of his hands reaching out for yours blindly, scrabbling against the back of your hand from where it's pressed against his chest, flipping it over and interlocking your fingers. "i'll take care of you. lie down for me?"

he moves you off his lap, guiding you onto your back, propping up pillows you can rest against. the familiar feeling of your bed is only faintly there, your senses filled with the sweet heady smell of haechan, from the perfume and lotion clinging onto his skin, as you watch him remove the numerous rings on his fingers, placing them carefully on your bedside table. 

haechan kisses his way down your body, suckling on your skin, leaving longer, lingering bruises on your hips, finally reaching your thighs as he lowers himself down. he guides your hips up with a heavy hand, sliding a cushion carefully under as he situates himself between your legs. you're so sensitive, that the feeling of his long hair against your skin has your thighs sliding together, squeezing around his head accidentally. 

"you okay?" he murmurs, as he kisses your thighs again, patiently easing your thighs open. 

you suddenly feel shy, knowing he was about to see you so intimately. even when you had agreed to let him take care of you, even as you trusted him completely, you had never imagined seeing him in between your spread legs like this, somewhere you hadn't even explored much yourself. would he be disappointed or disgusted? what if he didn't like what he saw or felt? 

"baby…." he rubs a hand carefully on your thigh, tips of his fingers slipping just under the hem of your skirt. "is this okay? do you want to stop?" 

"i don't want to stop," you admit, and you find that its true. 

haechan looks at you, studying your face. after a moment, he crawls back up your body, brushing the hair out of your eyes before he brushes his lips against yours softly, as if asking for permission. you grant it, lips parting as his warm mouth meets yours, a welcome taste in your mouth that's become familiar. you kiss for a while, his hand finding yours in the mess of sheets and intertwining your fingers, until you feel confident enough to slip your other hand to the zipper of your skirt. 

you tug it off your legs, haechan breaking away from the kiss to help you, moving down your body. 

"i'll take care of you," he whispers, his hand never letting go of yours. "these are so pretty, baby," he whispers, a finger tracing over the lacy pattern on the front of your panties. you've never been more aware of your own arousal seeping out of you, as he places a kiss low on your hip, and then another just on the waistband of your panties, and suddenly, you want nothing more than for them to come off. 

your fingers tug at them impatiently, and he takes hold of your hand, kissing your fingertips lightly. "let me," he murmurs, and you hear something low and raw in his voice, something that maybe wasn't there before. sitting up slightly, he pulls your panties down your legs, assuming his position as quickly as he'd left it once the fabric was out of the way, rearranging your legs so they're spread open for him. 

the tension in the room fills your lungs up like smoke. you barely mumble his name, beg him to do something, before you feel a soft touch against your clit, making your hips jolt and you let out a sharp exhale. 

"let me hear you," he encourages, gently, as he starts to rub circles into your sensitive nub, dipping down to your entrance and spreading your wetness all over your cunt. your hips keep shifting around, so he pulls his arm around to press down into you, keeping you still for him as he slowly pleasures you.

"t-this feels…" you start, lost in your own head. you've touched yourself before, but the sensitivity seemed to be heightened to an exaggerated amount once it was someone else touching you. he looks up at you, face still wickedly beautiful, the gentlest look in his eyes laced with something like desperation.

"can't believe i got so lucky," he murmurs, suckling a kiss close to your heat, high on the soft skin of your thigh. your legs clamp around his head, and it makes him groan, breath heavy against your cunt. "you're pretty everywhere, baby. can't believe i'm the only one." 

the words flood your veins with a dark thrill, the idea of being his, of him taking all your firsts. "hypocrite," you mumble, cutting yourself off with a moan as he applies more pressure to your clit. 

"maybe a little," he admits, shyly, as he dips his head back down and flicks your clit with the tip of his tongue, his fingers sliding down to your entrance instead. 

you cry out at the foreign feeling, the wet muscle of his tongue stroking your clit expertly while his slender finger slips past your entrance. his name, strung along by curses, echoes from your mouth as he teases his finger in and out of your entrance, tongue lying flat and wide as he laps at your clit in a way that made you feel like you were already close. 

stiffening his tongue, his flicks your clit with the tip, humming into you just as he curls his finger against your walls in a come-hither motion. he knows when you cum — back arching as you seemed to chase for stimulation above you, your walls sucking tightly around his finger and kneading it eagerly, making him groan as he imagines the feeling of you tight around his cock. he lets you ride out your orgasm on his face, his nose bumping your clit and eliciting another drawn out whimper, tongue teasing your entrance. 

when your hands push at his head, he backs away easily, once again making his way up your body to check on you, the warmth of his bare chest against yours making you feel safe. 

"good?" he kisses you, tongue moving against yours, inviting you to take a taste. "did you like that, sweetheart?" 

you nod, gasping. "haechan…"

"you did perfect for me, baby." his hands run up and down your sides as he kisses down your neck, enjoying the way your body wraps yourself around him, arms pulling his weight down into you. 

"i still need you," you murmur. the pleasure from before had only satiated you for a little bit, and the feeling of his hard length poking at your thigh was making your head spin with a whole different level of desire, as you grapple for his belt. "please, i've been good-" 

"you're perfect." he comforts you with a kiss. 

he guides your hand away from him gently, unbuckling his belt and letting his pants slide onto the bed as you lie back down on your pillows. tugging his underwear down, you swallow as he squeezes his thick length, the pink tip leaking clear liquid. he watches you watch him spread it on his length, pumping himself slowly, drawing out the pleasure as he moans, a sweet tenor sound that rings lewdly in the air. you watch, mesmerized, as he thrusts his hips forward a few times, stroking himself with a slight twist of his wrist before letting go abruptly, letting his cock slap up against his lower stomach. 

fishing around in the pocket of his discarded jeans, he takes out a condom wrapper, opening it quickly and rolling it onto his cock. you're sure you're making a mess of the sheets, you can feel your arousal and his saliva on your thighs, can feel another gush of wetness seep out of you as he lowers himself over your body and slides his cock against your folds. 

he grinds himself on you, hoping to get you wetter so it may be less painful when he enters you. his fingers find your clit again, this time he rubs it urgently, with just the correct amount of pressure to have you shaking and lifting your hips into him. 

"stop me anytime," he reminds you, as he lines himself up to your fluttering entrance. "you have to relax for me, baby." he pitches his voice lower now, and you can't tell if he's comforting you or if he's slowly being pulled under by lust too. he makes soft shushing noises, nipping at your lips with gentle kisses as you whimper, feeling the bulbous tip of his cock slowly stretch you open, his fingers resuming his movements. the head of his cock still feels shallow inside you, when it suddenly brushes against a sensitive spot, and his fingers on your clit glide just right, making you cum, hard. he feels you clamp down tightly around his tip, and he hisses, eyes squeezed shut. his mind wiped clean for just a second as pleasure thrums through his entire body, an aching pain that makes his mouth hang open.

"'m sorry," you whimper, tears prickling to your eyes as you interpret his expression as annoyance. "i'm so sorry, it just felt so good —" 

"baby…" he looks at you, his face morphing into panic when he sees the tears in your eyes. "don't apologise, please, you have nothing to be sorry for." 

you still look unconvinced, so he reaches for one of your hands, holding it in his and kissing your fingertips. "you are so pretty when you cum," the filthy words sound sacred the way he says them. "and you felt so fucking good around my cock," he murmurs, voice sinking low again.

you begin to relax again, sniffling slightly as you adjust your legs around his waist, feeling him slide a little deeper into you. he coaxes you into taking more of him, kissing you sweetly as he slips in further and further, until finally the both of you are groaning, his body shuddering slightly against yours as he feels your warm gummy walls tight around him. 

"so tight," he groans, cursing again under his breath as he circles his hips, drawing a moan from you as your thighs tense. "how are you so tight?," he panted, tone still teasing despite him trying desperately not to buck his hips into you. "has no one ever fucked you before or something?" 

you don't have it within you to tease back. 

"only you, haechan." the words are reverent, hushed. it strips him of any of his cockiness, his teasing, his boldness — his features softening at the way you look up at him, trying to maintain eye contact even as the ache between your legs drove you insane, not wanting to waste a single moment of this, in case it never happened again. 

"haechan…" your nails rake against his back, drawing him out of his daze. "please fuck me." 

"fuck," he breathes, as he slowly starts to move in you, obsessed with the way the words sound in your voice. his thick length drags against your walls, heavy inside you, the wet sounds of your arousal seeping into the room. you feel full and stretched out, sated by having him so close to you, it feels like you can feel him deep in your gut the way he's thrusting into you, especially when he hikes your legs higher on his waist, drawing a long moan from you as he manages to stimulate a spot inside you that has you seeing stars. 

he changes his pace, now barely pulling himself out of you as he nudges the head of his cock against your sweet spot. licking a long stripe from your neck up to your ear, one hand tangles itself with yours, while the other ghosts over your sensitive nipples. 

"i'm cumming," the words come out rushed as you barely hold onto your senses, cumming harshly for the third time, your body thrown into pleasure as your muscles tense. he succumbs to the feeling of your walls kneading his length and squeezing tight around him, eyes going unfocused and hazy as his lips part, a moan drawn out from his lungs without conscious thought. he's aware of the way your muscles tense as he fucks both of you through your highs, relishing in the sting of your fingernails on his back as he slows down his movements. he draws out both your highs by leaning in and sucking on the mark he'd left behind earlier that evening, letting his moan buzz and fizzle on your skin. 

you feel dazed and tired, arms never letting go of him, legs unwilling to unwrap from his waist as you cling to him. he rolls you both onto your sides, caressing your body sweetly and stroking your hair, mumbling questions and concerns that you can't register, nodding to everything in a blur. the weight of him feels good, his body warm and solid against your back, and once again that feeling of safety, that feeling of complete trust, washes over you. it makes you feel whole even as he pulls out of you with a wince, discarding the condom in the trash by your bedside. 

you cling to him, and he knows you need it — so he doesn't let you go, heavy hands patting your back clumsily, slightly rough and out of rhythm, just like the way your heart beats against your ribcage.

when he feels your arms loosen, relaxing finally after the high of hormones and adrenaline, he slips away quickly to the bathroom, putting on his underwear as he goes. he grabs a towel, turning your tap on to warm water and checking the temperature with his wrist as he washes his hands, his face, cleaning himself up. running the towel under the water and squeezing it dry in the sink. his movements methodical, as he slips out of your room and into the kitchen, looking around for a glass of water. 

he immediately races back the moment he hears a sound from your bedroom, shutting the door behind him just as you sit up, your expression clearing once you see him again. pulling his shirt from where it's discarded on the floor, he slides into bed, kissing you on the cheek. 

he cleans you up with soft strokes, the warm towel soothing on your skin even though he hadn't really been rough. he makes you drink from the glass of water, watching you drain it carefully. finally, slipping his large shirt over your frame, swallowing at the way it envelopes your body, a feeling stirring in his gut that he ignores. 

"y/n? are you with me?" when you don't respond, wide eyes looking up at him, he touches his fingers to your cheek. "baby?" 

each brush of his skin against yours felt like trails of fire, lingering warmth even after he pulls away. every look he gave you through his lashes, the slight pout to his lips when he broke away from a kiss, made you feel like you were caught in a riptide, your pulse out of your control. you wanted to crawl into him and make a home in his chest. you never wanted him to look at you again with his shuttered eyes, to have to dream yourself into the skin of someone else as he touched them. 

you had to tell him. "haechan…haechan i…" you reach for him, and he pulls you into his embrace, shushing you softly. you try to speak again, lips parting, but he envelopes your lips in a gentle kiss, nipping at your mouth each time you part, swallowing all your sounds with the sweep of his tongue. 

"princess…" his voice sounds raw, and coarse. "don't say anything you don't mean." 

"but-" 

"you don't know me." was it regret in his voice, or your wishful thinking? "you don't know me at all. what you're feeling right now…" he touches a hand to your chest, brushing a kiss on your cheek. "it's because of the sex, alright?" 

you shake your head. 

your next words come out slurred, your eyelids starting to droop as sleep begins to tug at your mind, threatening to pull you under. "but…why can't i know you?"  

he takes a deep breath. "i don't want you to."

"but i don't want this to end." 

he holds you tighter against his chest at your words. 

"this?" he questions, quietly. he keeps his voice light, but it still pierces your heart like a shard of glass. "there isn't a 'this' princess. this isn't happening again." 

"why?" 

"i don't want you to get attached." he cradles you even more carefully against him, freckling mellow kisses onto your forehead, the contrast between his words and his actions ringing dissonant in your ears. "besides… why would i spend the night with the same girl twice, hm?"

sleep softens the hurt from the words he's saying. his voice fades slightly, his touch against your skin roaring ever louder in your ears. "you know i won't be here when you wake up, right?" his fingers brush against your forehead lightly, pushing hair away from your eyes. 

you knew. 

but you still cried in the morning all the same — the golden-orange sunrise beautiful and terribly cruel, just like the boy you were perhaps falling in love with. 

—

you spend the weekend alone. 

you spend the weekend wondering if haechan thought of you at all, after he left. thinking if what he said was real, and it was just adrenaline and lust, then why did your heart ache at the thought of him? at his face on posters outside the small concert venue, inviting you to a show next week? why did you always turn at the slightest hint of his voice? 

you try to forget him. you try to tell yourself he wasn't worth it. but deep down all of it, a part of you still hopes, which is perhaps why you were letting jaemin drag you past the poster of haechan, into the alleyway that led backstage.

"are you sure you need me there?" you pull at jaemin's sleeve, your other hand holding onto his spare camera carefully as he guides you into the venue.  

"i do," he insists, pushing through a set of doors leading to the stage. "mark wants extra photos for their social media page and i can't be doing all of that at once." 

you can hear the boys talking just around one of the curtains, sprawled out onstage, a cacophany of sounds as they absentmindedly plucked at their instruments. you were going to see haechan again. you can't tell if it makes you want to run towards them, or go back home. that familiar sense of hope, the kind you experienced in the crowd that first night, on the balcony, in the bedroom and in the moonlight, fills you up slowly, sweet and light. maybe, if he just saw you again…

"y/n-" jaemin puts a hand on your arm, stopping you gently before you could rush onto stage. 

"yes?" you prompt. 

"i know i dragged you here, but if you're feeling uncomfortable," he starts, and you start to slip away, but he only tightens his grip. "let me finish — if you're feeling uncomfortable, or if any of them are hurting you, let me know okay?" 

you hadn't told him about haechan, something close to shame seeming to rise up and choke you whenever you tried to bring it up. all jaemin knew was that the last two times you had come into contact with the band it had upset you badly, and as your best friend and roommate he never wanted to see you crying on the balcony again. 

"what would you do? beat them up?" 

"i would leave." his serious tone doesn't change, unaffected by your attempt to lighten the mood. 

"but the money –" 

"no job is more important than you being okay," he insists. "i don't want to work for them if they hurt you. okay?" 

"okay." 

even though he looks unconvinced, his grip on your arm loosens and he takes your hand instead, pulling back the curtain with his other. 

you can hear him say something to mark about today's shoot, hear him greet the rest of the members. you guess that mark is rising to greet him, hear something like jisung and jeno standing too, but everything fades to white noise when the sight you're looking at clicks in your mind, the one member of the band who's voice you hadn't heard, who hadn't bothered to turn around at jaemin's arrival.

or rather, the one boy who was too pre-occupied to — considering he had his tongue in a pretty girl's mouth. 

haechan was facing away from you, away from the rest of his bandmates, you could really only see his broad back under his denim jacket, but the careful tilt of his head as he kissed her was all too familiar, as was the movement of his arms around her waist. and when she shifted in his lap, his hands pulling her hips down unto his, you can feel your heartbeat in your ears, a sharp pain searing at your chest in emotions you couldn't pinpoint. 

"fuck, sorry about that –" mark's voice is flustered, and now a tall boy, the bassist, jisung, is stepping in front of you, blocking your view of him. 

"sorry," he echoes, and you're momentarily caught off guard by how deep his voice is - husky and quiet. you blink up at him, fog slowly clearing in your mind, and he smiles shyly. "he doesn't usually do that." 

"who?" 

"um, haechan…" he looks back briefly, and you see haechan helping the girl to her feet, her body crumpled into his like she couldn't bear to be separated from his touch. you feel a wave of second-hand shame again – was that what you had looked like? 

and then jisung turns back to you, towering over you again and blocking everything from view. "he usually only does this after the show, but today…" 

"it's fine," you say, faintly. 

jisung looks at you, carefully. "you're jaemin's friend y/n, right?" 

you nod, half your mind still on what could be going on right now. behind jisung, you see mark pull haechan, now alone, towards a corner of the stage, whispering angrily at him. haechan is slouched lazily, picking at his nails with all the look of someone who couldn't care less about what was going on. 

"i saw you at our last show," jisung continues. "i was going to…i was going…" he breaks off, a little embarrassed, fumbling with his words. "are you sure you're okay?" 

"i'm fine, jisung." you repeat, your voice a little more firm, as you finally look back at him.

he blinks. "you know me?" 

jisung still looked worried, but there was something sweet about the way he shrunk a little under your attention, eyes darting all over your face and around his surroundings, blush tinging his cheeks.

this you were comfortable with – something completely different from the way haechan's eyes always tried to drink you in, or the way your vision would go blurry at the edges when he would stand in front of you. talking with jisung was easy, the confidence that haechan drained from you seeping back and settling in. 

he had meant it, when he said you shouldn't get attached. you just had to learn it before it brought you more hurt you couldn't justify.

"jisung," you emphasise. "of course i know you. you play bass, right?" 

"y-yeah," he stammers, pointing unecessarily at his dark blue bass guitar on its stand. "i don't know, i guess i always thought people didn't really know me even if they knew the band." he fiddles with the hem of his shirt, black hair falling over his eyes. "people usually choose to stand where haechan or mark are." 

"you usually stand on the left?" 

he nods, bashfully, and a smile tugs at your lips. 

"i'll make sure to stand there, later during the show." 

"wow, okay." he pauses for a moment, steeling himself. "how about after?" 

"what do you mean?" 

"would you want to meet…after the show?" he hesitates, voice soft. 

your brow furrows slightly. "do you mean the party?" 

"we don't have to go," he blurts out. "i don't mean…i don't mean like what haechan usually does after the show."  

his name is an unwelcome sting, but the way jisung sneaks glances up at you from where he looks down at his feet makes it a little easier to forget. "then what do you want to do?" 

"w-we can get something to eat." he says it like he just suggested robbing a bank. 

oh. "like a date?" 

mortified, his lips part, and you can tell that he's frantically trying to read your tone, trying to figure out if the idea of it made you uncomfortable, whether you were suggesting because you wanted it. it's so endearing, watching him start his sentences and stop them, the hem of his shirt crumpled and worn out by his nervous fingers. 

eventually, he takes a deep breath, and settles for a question. "d-do you mind if it's a date?" 

did you? 

was there any hope in waiting for haechan, when he had made it so clear that you would never have him again?

jisung is still looking at you like you have all the power in the world to hurt him. 

"i don't mind," you say, softly, feeling a hum of satisfaction in your chest at the way it makes his lips part in blissful surprise. a beat. "do you want it to be…?" 

"yes," he blurts out. "please," he adds, shyly. 

the awkward silence between the two of you feels good, the lightness of it familiar and giddy, like a schoolgirl crush. jisung can't stop smiling, biting his lips slightly as he turns to face mark, who's crossed to the front of the stage to speak to them. 

" — jisung, jaemin will start with your photos first. we'll just be shooting the rehearsal process today, so there's no need to-" he breaks off, brow furrowing. "jisung why are you so red?" 

"i-it's w-warm in here." 

"well you should cool off before jaemin takes your photos." jisung nods, flustered, and he walks offstage with jaemin to prepare. jeno too, strolls away with a wave to mark, leaving him alone at the front of the stage. 

with you. 

mark glances over at you, his eyes darting over your face, trying to read your expression. you can almost hear haechan's voice from that night, the ghost of the hurt still palpable in your bones. but the moment you take a step back, thinking that you should find jaemin and jisung, mark seems to have made up his mind — his face set, he starts to walk over to you, and you find your own footsteps falter.

"um, y/n, can i speak to you for a second?" 

you take a deep breath. "is this about the photos for later?" 

"no…not exactly." he clears his throat. there's a pause, as he seems to pick his words. "y/n, did i do something wrong?" 

you blink at him. "what do you mean?"

"i mean, i know it was a while ago, but i thought we were getting along fine at the party," it feels like he's rehearsed this to some capacity, or perhaps it was just the confidence of being a lead singer. "but then since then every time i saw you…i feel like you've been avoiding me." 

"i haven't been avoiding you." you take a deep breath. "mark, do you have a girlfriend?" 

his eyes widen. "are you…are you asking me out?"

"what?" you balk. "no!" 

"oh." his face falls. "i mean…i just thought…"

"that's just too bad, markie." 

it’s practically deja vu.

haechan stands behind you, his body radiating warmth, and you inhale sharply. surprisingly, he doesn't smell saccharine, the way he always does with the girls he chooses — his skin smells like baby powder and fresh linen. your body is doing that thing again – where you hone in on his presence and the whole world dissolves, and you're hyper attuned to the way his arm hovers near yours, his breath on the back of your neck. anything you were about to say to mark completely lost in your brain. 

exasperated, mark runs his hand through his hair. "haechan…don't be difficult." 

"i'm not." you feel almost numb when his hand touches your elbow, sliding down to hold your hand tight in his grip. "y/n and i have to talk about something." 

"can't it wait?" 

"it's urgent," haechan says, sarcastically, giving you a sharp tug towards him. your feet stumble as haechan starts to walk off, and you turn one last time to see mark standing there, looking a little forlorn, suddenly small under the bright lights of the stage. 

"sorry, –" you mumble out. mark frowns, starting towards you. 

but now haechan really pulls you along, yanking curtains aside and accessing a short flight of stairs. you can feel the intensity of his emotions radiating off him in waves, making it a little hard to breathe as you try to keep up, afraid of what he'll say if your hand slips from his grasp. 

he guides you along a corridor and through a doorway, stepping into the warm light of a dressing room, the door slamming shut behind you as haechan pulls you in. 

you're almost afraid to look at him, but you do anyway. 

he's slightly breathless from the walk down, stooping slightly to lock the door with careful hands. when he straightens and steps towards you, the lights hitting his features, you can see that he's covered up the hickeys on his neck with makeup. something mark made him do, no doubt. 

"haechan -" 

"park jisung? really?" he sneers, backing you into the dressing table. 

 "what?" 

"don't lie to me," he demands. "i saw you." 

"really?" you fold your arms across your chest as he moves in closer, planting both hands on the table on either side of your hips, caging you in. "you looked busy. where did she go, hm? did mark send her away, or did you?" 

haechan rolls his eyes. "that's none of your business." 

"jisung said you don't usually bring girls to the rehearsal," you continue, watching the way his tongue pokes into his cheek in annoyance. "what happened?" 

"you two talked about me?" he demands. "what else did you do? make plans to fuck after the show?" 

"i'm not a virgin anymore," you remind him, your voice laced with a warning. "i thought you only cared about my first time." 

haechan groans. seeing you talk to jisung out of the corner of his eye, seeing your hands brush and his friend's head duck shyly to the side, gave him a weight on his chest which grew heavier each time he took a breath, each time he had to hear one of jisung's small laughs. 

"if you want to have mediocre sex then i couldn't care less," he snaps. "just know that you're going to have to fuck a lot of people before you forget me." 

you can see that you're losing him, the familiar closed-off look coming back to his face, anger dissapating into indifference. 

"what is there to forget?" you ask, hurt and anger making your voice shake. 

haechan is staring at you, his face now so close to yours if you leaned in just slightly your lips would brush. 

"you don't mean that," he says, quietly. 

and just like that, all the fight drains out of you. 

"haechan, jisung just wants to take me out on a date." his features tense, and he bites his lower lip harshly. "would you ever ask me out on a date, haechan?" 

he doesn't respond.

"would you?" 

"i told you," he breathes. "i don't do that." 

"you told me you didn't want to be my first time, and you took it back," you remind him, quietly. 

"that's different." you can't help the disappointment that wells up inside you, and you know he can see it from the way his face falls too. 

"don't look at me like that, princess." he sinks into your touch easily, warmth once again circling your body.  

you don't know if you wished haechan was a liar, or if you wished he wasn't. if he was telling the truth about everything, it would be easier to let go of him, to walk away from someone who could only cause you pain, from someone who played with you over and over again. 

but maybe if he was lying it would all make sense – the way he said he didn't want you and yet kept showing up, the jealousy and the conflict in his voice, all of it would have some sort of plausible reason, one that would mean that maybe he cared for you. 

"i don't want to do this anymore," you mumble, hands placed on his chest. you only push at him lightly, but he backs off all the way to the opposite wall, your words feeling like salt in his wounds. "i can't do this with you, haechan."

"y/n-"

"you have a show soon," you mumble, turning around to look in the mirror. you comb your hair with your fingers, trying to calm yourself down. behind you, haechan's eyes flash with frustration, his jaw clenched and his eyebrows drawn together as he looks up at your reflection. 

"i'm trying to talk to you." 

"are you?" it's a genuine question, and it makes him falter, a response half-formed on his lips. when it's clear he won't finish his thought, you close your eyes. 

"you need to go," you say again, quietly.  

"will you be there?" 

you don’t respond, and he repeats himself, urgently. 

"will you be there? at the show?" 

"i will," you say, hesitantly. 

"i'll see you then." his voice is controlled, and steady. somehow it feels like the calm before the storm. 

but before you can turn around to try to talk to him, persuade him to calm down, ask him what's wrong, he's already left the room, the sound of his heeled boots echoing down the hall. 

—

"is everything okay?" 

"why are they taking so long?" 

"are they late?" 

unease settles in the pit of your stomach as you stand in the crowd, the voices all around you whispering anxiously. it had been 15 minutes since the show was scheduled to start — but the lights on the stage were dim, and the pre-show playlist had just restarted for the second time. you had situated yourself on the left side of the stage, where jisung usually stood, and you bounced on your toes, hoping that everything was alright backstage so jisung could come out and see that you had kept your promise. 

and then there's a low rumble, as lights finally flood the venue, the crowd sighing with relief as jeno and mark appear – jeno waving at the crowd, his drumsticks in one hand, while mark smiles reassuringly, walking over to the mic and checking that it's at the correct height. he apologizes lightly for the delay, looking to the side of the stage nervously as he murmurs a quick introduction of the band into the mic.

haechan strides onto stage, electric guitar slung around his neck, as the crowd's screams reach an all-time high. he stops abruptly at the left side of the stage, right in front of where you stood, nodding at the crowd and cocking his head from side to side, as if preparing for a fight. he keeps his face level as his eyes find yours, that same burning intensity you felt in the dressing room unwavering as he held your gaze.

and then jisung appears, footsteps faltering where haechan stood, the grip on his bass going slack.

"haechan." jisung's voice is soft, you can barely hear it from where you stand so close to the stage. you can tell that the crowd behind has no clue what's going on, but some fans are looking at each other confusedly, pointing at the two boys, and the position on mark's left where haechan usually stood, now empty. 

"yes?" haechan's not looking at jisung, fingers running phantom chords up and down the fret board. 

"w-why are you standing here?" jisung whispered, embarrassment evident in his tone. "aren't you supposed to be on mark's left?" 

haechan's eyes briefly flick up to yours. "not today." 

distressed, jisung makes a sound. "haechan." guilt fills up your lungs like smoke, making it difficult to breathe, a twist in your chest as jisung looks over at you, lost. 

"run along, jisung," haechan murmurs, softly. "don't want to keep the fans waiting." 

mark, not wanting to draw attention to them, keeps smiling at the crowd, starting to ask them a few questions. jisung only tries a few more times, haechan resolutely ignoring him, before finally accepting defeat, casting his eyes over to you — his gaze wounded and confused, as he walks off with his bass. he assumes haechan's position, and the crowd cheers encouragingly. the boy manages a smile. 

when mark starts to introduce the first song, haechan finally looks up, a faint smile playing on his lips as his eyes lock with yours again. just like the day you met. 

and just like the day you met, you felt yourself fall under his spell, yet again. 

—

"haechan, i think we —" you gasp out, in between the kisses that haechan is pressing to your lips. 

he gives a non-committal hum, his legs framing your body as he holds you close to his chest. his lips are warm and soft, tasting slightly of cherries, as he opens you up little by little, chaste kisses turning into open-mouthed ones, his tongue darting out and gently licking into your mouth in a way that was intoxicating. 

you grip onto his arm harshly, trying to ground yourself, and he inhales sharply, breaking away. 

"haechan –" you pant. "we should-" 

but then he's kissing you again, smothering your words with his lips and his tongue. his hands rub at your lower back, guiding your movements as you shift against him, his hips grinding upwards almost lazily. 

"jisung, –" you start, but now he gives a groan, rumbling through his chest almost like a roar. slumped back against the car door, he glares at you, touching the corner of his wet mouth with his thumb.

"you did not just fucking say my bandmates name while you're on me." 

"we should apologize to jisung," your words come out in a rush. 

"for?" he catches the look on your face, and rolls his eyes. "fine," he mumbles. "i'll talk to him." leaning up towards you, he starts to pepper kisses down your jaw, sucking a little harder on the mark he had left before. "kiss me?" he mumbles, and you have to stop yourself from caving in. 

"haechan," you press on, as haechan licks boldly at your collarbone. "haechan –"

"keep saying my name," he murmurs, hands roaming up your shirt, teasing over the clasp of your bra. 

"mark, —" 

"fuck." breaking away agian, haechan tips his head back, lips stretched out and puffy as he tongued his cheek. "you want me jealous princess? is that it? because it's fucking working –" 

"haechan, we keep hurting people." you place both hands on his chest, trying to calm him down. 

"what?" 

"today we hurt mark too. although, i don't really know why–" you break off, thinking about how he looked as he tried to follow after you and haechan. how jisung's cheeks burned red as he walked across the stage. "haechan, they're your friends." 

"you wanna hurt jeno too?" he raises his eyebrows, his own hands now mindlessly scraping against yours. "you can lead him on, and then we can fuck while he watches. although he'll probably like that –" 

again, he takes in the way you frown. "fine. sorry. jeez." 

"i don't want to hurt people because of us," you say, softly. 

"well," he exhales. "they're only hurt because they can't have you, princess." he tucks your hair behind your ear from where its come loose. "there's nothing we can do, hm?"

you shake your head. "you're not being fair," you whisper. 

"how so?" his hands slide down. there's something possessive in the drag of his palms, the way he squeezes your waist. 

"you don't call me yours…but you also don't let them near me." your voice is small, but it rings loud in the silence of the car all the same. the streets outside were empty and deserted, and you think you can hear your heart beating in the still air as your palms stay pressed on his firm chest. "haechan…i need you to choose."  

it's a long time before haechan responds. he's tired from the show and all the adrenaline, you can feel it in his slow breathing, in the way his eyes blink slowly up at you like an afterthought. but his eyes are what give it away – his gaze is sharp and calculative as his eyes roam your body, his touches not quite as drowsy as he appears, fingers tingling against skin. 

you wait, your heart in your throat. you wait and you hope. 

his full lips part, his eyes meeting yours. 

"so…this is our last time together?" 

of course that's his choice. the disappointment spreads like cold, an ache deep in your bones. "if that's what you choose." your voice is flimsy. "haechan, —" but nothing leaves your mouth, just a wounded sound. everything rushing up inside you like a waves breaking over the shore, memories flooding your senses. 

the hurt on mark's face. haechan's hands on your skin. the blush that burned at jisung's skin as he watched haechan pull you to his car, his figure growing smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror. haechan's lips against your ear as he held you. 

"shhh," his arms hold you against his chest, smoothing down your spine as he comforts you as if you were a baby, you clinging on tight to him as if he were going to disappear. "it's okay," he murmurs. "we'll just have to make it count, hm?" gently, he guides your face out of his chest, relieved when he realizes that you're not crying yet, at least. kissing your cheek gently, he brushes his thumb against the apples of your cheeks. "are you alright? do you want me to take you home?" 

"s-stop it." you manage to steady your breathing enough to repeat yourself. "stop being gentle with me, haechan. stop leading me on." 

"stop getting hurt," he replies, a little teasing, but his tone aches. 

"kiss me?" 

this time you do, letting him guide your movements, as he pulls you down into his body as if he were trying to pull you all the way through him. 

his kisses are slow and sweet, tilting his head almost shyly, the tip of his nose bumping against yours as he leans up into you. his tongue carefully slides over your bottom lip, before he's nudging your lips apart with his own again, tongue gently moving over yours, pulling away with a small smile when you chase after him, tongue stuck out slightly, chasing the warmth of his mouth. 

"cute," he mumbles, and you pull your shirt up over your head just so he won't see the way your cheeks burn in the dark. 

his movements become a little more urgent as he unclasps your bra, letting it slide to the floor of his car as he surges towards you. his lips begin to suck marks onto your chest, hands now squeezing your soft breasts, mapping your body indulgently. his tongue licks slowly around your right nipple, before giving it a gentle flick with his tongue, your body shifting restlessly against him as it sends a wave of arousal down to your core. he hugs you against him to steady your movements, lapping at your nipples and guiding each roll of your hips down into his. 

your hands find their way into his hair, pulling him away from you. before you can tell him to stop teasing, he's kissed you again — placating. sweet like he knew everything you were about to say, before you even said it. 

you raise your hips as his hands smooth over the pleats of your skirt, before flipping the soft material upwards. you hadn't worn anything special, not having the courage to, but the way he looked at your simple white panties, thumb running carefully over the pink bow in the middle of the waistband, made you feel warm all over. you hurry to pull them off, just to break the moment, but he catches them right before you tug them off your ankle. 

"can i keep these?" his doe-eyes blink up at you. you can see the brown in his irises, almost gold in the light. you nod, and he lets out a laugh, kissing you through his smile as his fingers wander up your thighs. 

he starts with slow circles on your clit, stroking the nub gently, feeling the way your hips shift at the feeling. when he speeds up his motions, fingers teasing along your slit and catching at your entrance a few times, your hips begin to pick up a steady rhythm, rocking into his hand. 

"do you just want to cum like this?" he asks kindly, placing a bit more pressure on the tips of his fingers. he wants to be inside you badly, his erection almost painful from the lack of contact, but he knew that it might do more for him than it did for you.

this was how he wanted you to be taken care of for your first time, for your second time — this is why he didn't want you to slip away from him into rooms with men who wouldn't know what you needed, wouldn't care what you wanted.

or at least — it's what he tells himself to keep him sane. 

"'m close," you mumble, your movements uncoordinated, neediness driving your hips into his hand, pleasure that you didn't quite know how to handle. "feels so empty, haechan, please –" 

he slows down his movements, a hand sliding over your waist to rub at your lower back, eliciting a warm sound from you that radiates into his chest. he slides a finger into your tight entrance, feeling the way you tense around him, slowly slipping the finger in and out, curling against your walls carefully. his thumb comes up to press your clit, and you inhale sharply as the pressure in your abdomen builds. 

"more…" 

"baby, you're doing so well," he praises. freckling careful kisses on your neck to distract you, you feel another finger catch against your entrance, his hand breaking its rhythm to carefully slide in, stretching your hole out even more. with a lewd suck on the base of your neck, he curls both fingers against your walls, a slick finger slipping on your clit, and you feel yourself crash headfirst into your high, thighs clamping around his hand in sensitivity as you moan. he murmurs praises against your ear, kissing your jaw sweetly between each one. 

he removes his hand from your core with a wet sound, and you drop down into his lap, feeling weak at the knees even though you weren't standing. he lets out a groan, feeling your wetness and warmth through his jeans, and he can feel his cock twitch under the fabric. but still, he waits until your breathing evens out, using his cleaner hand to stroke at your sides, humming lightly under his breath, the reassuring sound filling the car. his breaths sync with yours as you come down from your high, and together you let out a shaky exhale. 

"do you mind?" he asks, quietly, hands going to his belt slowly, trying not to startle you. "we don't have to have sex. i just really need to take care of this now…" you nod, flustered, crawling backwards down his legs, and he leans forward to kiss the crown of your hair. against the soft sounds of your breathing, the sound of him unbuckling his belt, letting it drop into the shadows, and the rustle of fabric as he tugged his jeans and underwear down as much as he could, were endlessly arousing. you felt yourself begin to pulse with need again, your thighs squeezing together when he pulls out his cock, thick and heavy against his palm, the tip blushy and leaking. 

he gives himself a tentative stroke, spreading pre-cum over his length before squeezing the base and hissing at the feeling as he tries to stop from cumming too soon. as if in a trance, you reach out towards him, your hand curiously wrapping around his shaft. he groans, low, as you give him a tentative stroke, although the sound is cut off by a high whimper when your fingers rub the head of his cock, silky under your fingertips. 

"baby, you don't have to –" he's cut off by another moan as you squeeze his length, applying more pressure as you stroke. "fuck, jus' like that," he mumbles, weakly, as you twist your wrist a little on a downstroke, palm slippery with pre-cum. after a few more strokes, watching haechan's head loll this way and that, twisting with pleasure, you pay more attention to his tip, thumbing just under it, fingers rubbing his slit. haechan's hips are restless, thrusting into your hand, his body shaking and the muscles on his abdomen clenched tight. you give him a few more strokes, and his whines fill up the car, raspy and sinful in a way that made you crave him even more. 

mimicking his movements, you slide your hand back down to his base and squeeze. he blinks hazily up at you, lips still parted, panting breathlessly. 

"baby…" 

"i need you," your voice feels broken, desire pulsing through each syllable. "please haechan," you add, as he swallows harshly, his cock twitching slightly against the warmth of your hand. 

pulling you towards him, he kisses you again, fingers wandering down to your heat and stroking your folds. "so wet from touching me, baby?" he teases, smiling against your lips as he slips a finger in, and then another, your walls sucking him in easily. he finds your soft spot immediately, your thighs shaking around his hand as you whine. it's a sound embarrassing to your own ears, but it's like music to haechan's ears, as he lets out a low groan. 

"it's too bad it's your last time with me," he murmurs, lightly, as he takes a condom out from the glove compartment, his hands moving swiftly as he tears open the package and rolls it onto his cock. "i would love to record your pretty sounds…" your voice lets out another small whimper, as if proving him right, as he adjusts you on his lap so the head of his cock lines up with your entrance. slowly, you sink down on him, clutching onto his body for support as you feel him fill you up tightly. 

"breathe," he coaxes, letting his own head sink back against the seats, the hazy feeling of you wet and warm around him intensifying as you take all of him inside you. he continues on, trying to distract you by peppering gentle kisses all over your cheeks. "would you like to hear your voice in a song, sweetheart? all the girls in the crowd wondering who's pretty voice is on the track, wondering who's making her feel this good…" he hisses, when he feels you pulse around him. "you want that?" 

your lips part, stuttering out jumbles of half-sentences, yes-es and nos. "'m just teasing, baby," he coos, as he thrusts his hips upwards experimentally, bouncing you on his lap. you lean into his body, feeling muscle firm under your palms as you raise your hips and grind against him, sensitivity making your thighs shake as the movement stimulates your clit. 

responding to your need, his arm loops around your waist while his fingers wander towards your clit, stroking and rubbing it expertly as he continues to thrust up into you, the car jolting with his movements. his strong thighs tense as he moves, barely pulling out before stuffing himself into you again, your walls kneading his length in a way that makes his body feel hot with need, chasing his climax. your soft sounds each time his tip grazes your soft spot are an aphrodisiac, and he feels himself growing impossibly harder inside you, so aroused it almost hurts. 

"haechan, i'm cumming," you moan, and his fingers put more pressure on your clit, as you bounce on him, eager for release. 

"keep saying my name," he breathes, pulling you close, your bodies moving frantic and unsteady against each other, as you cum, mouthing his name against his skin. he empties himself into the condom soon after, hips still jolting as he helps you ride out the aftershocks of your climax, your breaths echoing loud in the car.

you almost wanted to ask for round 2 — and you were sure he would give it to you, if you had asked. instead you stay silent, feeling emptier than ever as he pulls out, your body draining of his warmth as he cleans you with wipes from his glove compartment, kissing you sweetly whenever your eyes met. the water bottle he procured from the passenger seat of the car making you wonder if this was his plan all along, as you sipped quietly, as he put your address in his phone to take you home. 

—

you can feel him slip away from you on the drive back. 

a sea of red and green lights move across the planes of his face as you watch him drive, one hand on the wheel and the other touching your hand softly on the centre console. you give his fingers a faint squeeze and he smiles, bringing your hand up to his lips and pressing a light kiss to your fingertips. 

when you reach the next intersection, he pulls his hand from yours and puts it back on the steering wheel. 

when he makes his next turn, his shoulders start to tense and the easy, relaxed expression on his face morphs into a stony one. 

and when he finally pulls up in front of your apartment building, turning to face you, the glowing streetlights illuminating the outlines of his face do nothing to soften the blow of seeing him like this again — looking at you with half-lidded eyes, almost lazy in his power. 

"are you coming to the next show?"  

"i want to," you respond, your voice small. "...should i?" 

"it doesn't really matter to me." his fingers tap against the wheel, restlessly. "i just hope you know you shouldn't wait around afterwards." 

you bite your lip. "i know." 

he nods. "so you know this is over?" 

"i know." 

"good girl." it feels like a punch to the stomach, and you inhale, sharply, hands gripping the handle of the car door. waiting for him to dismiss you, as he always did. 

but then he's speaking again, breaking the silence. his voice is softer, a little more hesitant – "do you need me to walk you up?" he's not looking at you, eyes trained on his dashboard. "will you be okay?" 

it's cruel, the way your heart stutters in your chest. you take one last look at him, trying to memorize everything — the sharp line of his jaw, his collarbones, the joints of his fingers, the way his pinky finger crooks slightly to the right. the faint smell of vanilla and something darker, mixed with his warmth. you try to memorize it because you're sure this is the last time you'll be so close to him again, both in proximity, and in the way his voice aches with something close to tenderness. in that moment, you know if you told him you needed him, he would turn off the engine and open your car door, holding you safe against his chest and walking you up to your apartment. but what for? for him to shut off on the way up the elevator, and turn into a stranger at your door? 

"it's fine," you murmur, and you don't wait for a response before stepping out into the warm night. 

—

your ribs press against the barrier, and you wince slightly. the crowd screams loud in your ear, as the boy in front of you looks up from his guitar at the crowd in front of him, dark gaze sliding over faces, tongue poking at his cheek and puffy lips stretched. 

his eyes briefly meet yours, and your heart skips a beat. 

and then he's looking back down at his guitar again, lips pursed in concentration. 

the next time he glances up, the familiar glint is back, eyebrows drawn together. there was something strange about the way he was looking at you, not exactly meeting your eyes. was he looking at your clothes? your hair? or… 

"oh my god!" 

you shoot a brief glance back, at the girl who's just let out a squeal. she claps her hands over her mouth, eyes shining as she stares adoringly at haechan, unblinking. you don't have to check to know he's staring right back — you know the look on her face a little too well. 

the disappointment and jealousy weighing on your chest is entirely unjustified, but you feel it heavy in your bones, anyway. 

he had meant every word: it was truly over. 

–

"did anyone see you?" 

"no," you whimper, as he mouths over the seat of your panties, tongue lapping at your folds through the fabric. 

"good girl," he pants, letting out a satisfied groan when he tugs them down your legs, burying his face in between your legs with a lewd moan. 

but if it was truly over, why did he find you after the show last week, – slipping by you to tell you to meet him in the upstairs master bedroom, where he fingered you open in front of the mirror?

if it was truly over, why did a stagehand stop you from leaving after the next show you went to, passing you a note that told you to wait at the back entrance of the venue? 

"fuck fuck fuck-"

and if it was truly over, why was he currently in between your spread legs, his mouth and chin covered with your juices as you lay on his bed?

"need you now, princess." his fingers brush your clit, and your thighs shake with overstimulation. "are you okay? i can wait-" 

"don't wait," you plead, pulling him towards you. he follows, propping himself up on his arms as his face reaches yours, his lips gently nudging your own apart, letting you taste yourself on his tongue when he kisses you. his sticky hands stroke your sides, leaving trails on your skin. "haechan –" 

he interrupts you with another kiss. freckling more kisses down your neck, he smiles against the mark he left days ago, fading slightly now. "i missed this," he murmurs, and your heart stings, a collection of memories surfacing in your mind – of his eyes avoiding yours at shows. of him waiting onstage for someone else. of him smiling at you cordially, face blank as if he were greeting you for the first time when he talked to you in front of other fans. 

"did you really?" 

he doesn't respond, latching his lips to your skin with a hum, hands cupping your breasts in one swift motion, fingers teasing over your nipples and making your body arch into his touch. 

"haechan…"  

"what do you want, princess?" he wanders lower, licking at your cleavage. your mind threatens to blank when he circles a fingertip around your areola, puffy wet lips closing around a nipple and sucking wetly. "hm?" 

"want you to fuck me…" your voice is shaky, but you press on. "like how you were gonna fuck that girl."  

his hands still for just a brief second. you can see your words hit him, understanding and lust flickering in his responding laugh. he focuses his eyes back on your face, hands now coming up to brush your lips, caressing your cheek, smoothing over your skin almost lovingly.

this is how he was going to fuck her? 

"open up," he murmurs, fingers pressed to your bottom lip. as if stuck in a trance, your lips part. 

a wet mess of saliva, still mixed with traces of your arousal, drips down from his tongue into your mouth, connecting your lips with his in a glossy sheen. his lips tug into a smile as he sees your blown-out pupils, arousal completely overriding his every thought. 

his fingers trace your jaw. "swallow," he commands, sweetly, and as always you do exactly as he says. 

you feel something shift against your upper thigh, your hips rising on instinct to buck against his hard length, still trapped behind his ripped jeans. 

his low groan is interrupted by a sharp rattling of the doorknob, followed by a thud against the door. both of you still, eyes focused on the locked door, straining your ears to hear the voices outside. 

"are you sure no one saw you?" haechan asks, quietly. "did jisung see you? mark? jeno?"

"i don't think so," you mumble. 

that was the arrangement you had come up with a little over a week ago, discussed in heated kisses and bliss-induced haze. you could keep seeing haechan, as long as you never saw the rest of the band again. on nights when he knew he wanted you, you would slip through crowds like a ghost to make your way into warm beds and cold bathrooms, saving him from the jealousy, and saving you from the questions. 

of course, there were a few nights where no message would find you, where he wouldn't grab your wrist as you brushed past him in a hallway, his hands distracted with someone else. those nights used to make you cry, your entire being aching for his attention, his indifference just as bruising as his care. 

the doorknob rattles again, and there's a knock on the door. 

"haechan? are you in there?" 

mark's voice. 

"they're back early from the party," haechan mumbled. to your shock, he ignores them and tugs off his shirt roughly, revealing delicate tanned skin dotted with moles, looking soft-to-touch. 

"haechan," mark's voice is exasperated. "i thought we agreed not to bring girls to our apartment." 

haechan rolls his eyes as his hands go to his belt, ridding himself of his pants and underwear. you can see the muscles in his thighs tense as he makes his way up the bed, hands holding your hips.

"you wanted me to fuck you like the other girls?" he murmurs, low so only you can hear. "well. on your knees." 

"but mark is –" you break off, seeing the way his eyes narrow, something dangerous flickering in his pupils. "but…but they're outside," you whisper. as if to prove your point, mark bangs on the door again. 

and then jisung's voice, low and urgent comes through the door. "who is he even with? the girl he left the show with was alone when i saw her."

"god, are they all outside the door?" haechan grumbles, focusing his attention back on you when you let out a small sound of distress. "forget about them," he soothes, leaning in to kiss you on the lips. his mouth moves over yours searingly, possessive and all-consuming in the way he pushes his tongue into your mouth. "on your knees," he commands, quietly, against your mouth. "i won't ask again." 

a thrill runs down your spine as you flip over, his large hands adjusting you so your back arches, head pressed into the pillows as he holds your hips up. he presses a kiss to your back as he reaches off the bed for a condom, rolling it onto his hard length with a soft groan. you look over your shoulder, see him stroking himself, mouth hanging open. 

"hurry," you plead. you can feel slick on your thighs from the way he ate you out earlier, growing wetter from anticipation. "please." 

he ignores you. "can you be quiet for me?" he mumbles. outside, you can hear the boys discussing something heatedly, voices low so you can't make out the words. "don't want anyone else to hear you."

"yes," you promise, meekly. 

"good girl." he lines himself up to your entrance, reaching around to rub your clit as he runs the tip of his cock against your folds. you let out a shaky breath at the feeling, trying hard not to let it catch your vocal cords. 

one hand on your hip and the other stroking your lower back, he pushes in slowly, letting you adjust to his girth. you feel a sting as he stretches your walls, filling you up deeply while burying himself inside you. he murmurs for you to relax, listening to you take shallow breaths, the way your hole flutters around his length making him want to thrust forward, relieve his own ache. 

"haechan, are you asleep?" 

there's a sharp rap on the door, and haechan curses as it makes you tighten around him, gummy walls gripping him like a vice, as if begging for his cum. 

"you liked that, baby?" his voice is low, and mocking. you whimper. "you like the idea of them coming in and seeing you like this? letting me take you like a slut?" 

"haechan, we know you're in there." now it's jeno's rough voice, devoid of its usual warmth. "we saw the shoes at the door. we need to talk." 

haechan pulls out until only his tip is still inside you, and slams back in aggressively, filling you to the brim. he starts to build a rhythm, thrusting deep and slow inside you, letting you feel the drag of him against your walls as he strokes your clit with his fingers. he was taking his time with you — pausing to lean forward and press kisses to your shoulders, mouthing messily over your skin. 

"haechan, please -" you try to keep your voice quiet, but he chooses this time to fuck you a little harder, picking up the pace, and your mouth hangs open as your aborted whimpers turn into drawn out moans.  

"hm?" he prompts, faking nonchalance. but you can feel that the pace is affecting him too, his breathing growing heavier as he speeds up a little more. 

"harder," you mumble, words feeling thick and slow in your mouth. "faster. fuck," 

a bang on the door. the loud sound makes you jolt, and haechan hisses as you clench down on him harshly again, your thighs inching closer together, creating a tighter fit around his thick cock. 

"i wonder why they're not coming in yet." his voice in your ear is low, sultry. the kind he uses on-stage when he's teasing the crowd. 

"i-isn't the door l-locked?" 

"sure…but it's a really old lock. i know mark could open it if he really wanted to. he's done it before when i'm late for rehearsals, ah fuck-" he's slamming himself into you, barely pulling out before pushing in again, wet sounds filling the room. "fuck, you must really like that. how do you just keep getting tighter and tighter, hm?" 

"haech–" 

"maybe i'll ask them to come in…" he muses, his tone sickly sweet. "i just know you'll cum hard on my cock when they open the door, right? let them see how filthy you are?" 

"don't –", you choke. 

"should i tell them not to come in?" 

"no," you gasp, and he laughs, darkly. 

"no, i should tell them to come in?" he asks between breathless pants, pace unrelenting as the lewd sound of skin against skin fills the room. "you want me to talk to them baby?" 

you let out an incoherent mumble, no longer sure of anything. 

he coos at that. "dumb already, princess?" his hand wanders up to your chest, blunt nails haphazardly scraping across your nipples. your hips push back onto him instinctively, fucking yourself onto his length, your hips chasing pleasure from the sensitivity as you cum. 

"haechan, i'm not leaving until you open the door." another thud, as mark sits down. 

"fuck…" haechan's only half listening to mark as he throws his head back, murmuring curses as he feels you clench around him, milking his cock. it takes all the self control he has to place his hands on your waist, stilling your movements as he pulls out of you. he's so hard that it hurts, and he knows his release is close, but he still shifts your body until you're lying on your back, and he can see your tear-streaked face, drool smeared all over your chin. 

you mouth his name soundlessly, fresh waves of tears gathering on your waterline as you see him move away from you, and you try to sit up to keep him in your line of sight. 

"haechan, –" 

"i'm here," he murmurs, one hand immediately finding yours and squeezing, the other grappling for the water bottle on the bedside table. he unscrews the cap with one hand as he moves towards you, helping you prop yourself up against the headboard. "drink." 

he holds the bottle up to your lips, but you shake your head. "want you," you whisper, even though your mouth feels warm and sticky, your throat dry from moaning. you can't focus on anything except for the emptiness inside you, your clit throbbing whenever you shift your thighs together slightly. you're focused on his hard length, the slope of his shoulders down to his slender waist. you shake your head again, knocking the bottle against your lips and spilling a little bit of the water onto the sheets. 

"don't be a brat." his voice is low, a dangerous sort of patience in his tone. "drink, or i won't give you what you want." 

you swallow, his voice washing over you, pulling you under. this time when he raises the bottle to your lips, you hold it with shaky hands, letting water trickle down your throat. his own hand comes up, touching two fingers to your neck gently, making sure you were drinking instead of pretending by feeling for the movement of your throat.  

"done?" he watches you lick your parted lips, dewy with water and saliva, and takes the bottle from you, placing it back on the stand. "do you want to keep going?" 

you nod, slowly. 

"use your words," he commands, quietly. 

"please don't stop," you plead, shuffling towards him. it feels like the fog has cleared slightly in your head, the water making the heat haze dissipate. vaguely, you're sure that mark, jisung, and jeno must know what you were doing – must have heard the headboard thumping against the wall, haechan's low groans and your breathless whimpers. 

you wonder what mark is thinking now, outside, not leaving and yet not breaking in like haechan said he could. it sends a wave of arousal down to your core, some part of you wanting him to see the way you break for haechan, completely and wholly his. your way of rejecting him without having to see his face – your way of explaining why you ignored him whenever he caught your eyes during shows and after-parties. 

haechan reads you easily, observing the way your eyes flicker to the door. he's torn between opening the door himself — letting mark see you on his bed, fucked stupid by him, or stepping outside and telling mark to leave because no one should see or hear you like this but him. 

"do you want me to tell mark to leave?" 

"n-no," you hesitate. "don't."

he raises his eyebrows. "why?" 

"w-want him to know that i'm yours," you mumble, a hand wrapping around his thigh and squeezing. 

haechan's eyes darken. “mine?” he echoes, quietly, almost gently.

you're so focused on the shift in his features – the set of his jaw, the way he tenses, that you barely notice he's sliding off the bed and picking you up effortlessly so that you cling to his upper body, legs gripping his waist. his lip curls into a smile, head tilted mockingly as he starts to walk, strong arms holding you up.

your back hits solid wood, and you gasp. 

"haechan?" mark's voice is crystal clear on the other side of the door. 

haechan adjusts his grip, pushing you against the door as he slides his tip along your dripping cunt, making you squirm in his hold. 

"be good, hm?" he whispers, as he pushes into you, eyes squeezing shut and jaw dropping open at the feeling of your walls sucking him back in, pulsing along his length and making his cock throb. when he opens his eyes again, his gaze is unfocused, hazy, and you can see that this situation is heightening his arousal, causing his thrusts to be sloppy and unfocused as he chases his own high. each time he pushes into you, the weight of his hips snapping against yours pushes against the door, and you hear it jolt a little, the lock jiggling.

mark's shouted expletive rings against your ears, mirrored by haechan's own as he captures your lips in a kiss. the feeling is familiar and new at the same time, his tongue sliding languidly over yours, swiping against your bottom lip. at the sight of your parted mouth and wet lips, he moans again, and without hesitating he spits into your waiting mouth, sloppy and messy, causing it to dribble past your lips and down your chin. 

the rhythm against the door is unmistakable, and you can hear footsteps as mark runs off. haechan laughs, a pleased hum in his chest that vibrates against your own as he leans into you, and he mouths down your neck, biting at your shoulder and letting his low groan scrape against his throat as a growl. you cum when your stiff nipples brush against his chest, the tiny bit of stimulation just enough to throw you over the edge into your orgasm, your thighs clenching around him as you sob, your core aching. 

the feeling of your walls rippling around his length is too much to bear, and he barely lets you ride out your orgasm on him before he's pulling out of you and carrying you back to his bed. haechan tugs off the condom urgently as you lie there, tired and spent, watching as he strokes his length, fast, eyes fluttering open and shut with lust, his hips thrusting forward uncontrollably. his thumb ghosts just under the head of his cock, and then he's cumming all over your stomach and chest, sticky white spurts pooling on your skin. 

you watch him out of half-lidded eyes as his breathing slows, collapsing next to you in a heap. the high from the sex hasn't faded yet – the consequences of being heard by all his bandmates hasn't hit you, as you bask in the temporary glow of being his. 

a finger traces along the cum on your stomach, haechan transfixed by the sight. curious, your hands grab for the small mirror on his bedside table, and he comes out of his daze, handing it to you wordlessly. 

in the moonlight, the marks he's made on your skin blur with the shadows. no part of you looks untouched — your tear-streaked face and kiss-swollen lips, bruises on your hips and the sting of the bite mark on your shoulder. your hands tremble a little as you focus the mirror on where his fingers play with his drying cum on your skin, tracing lines and curves. 

"'m yours," you mumble out. 

"yeah?" he chokes. "mine?" 

dazedly, you point to your neck. "yours." 

he groans, just watching you, eyes roving over your body. "you're beautiful," he whispers. you think he means it.

"more." your voice is quiet. 

"no more, baby," he murmurs, looking up at you with concern. "it's too much for you." 

you shake your head. "these could be from anyone," you point at the marks on your neck. his body tenses, hands stiff on your skin. "i want to be yours." 

slowly, your words settle over him. he looks at you with an unreadable expression, the kind you see right before he strikes his first chord, the moment his eyes find yours in the crowd. a dark sort of determination, in the way his holds your gaze. 

he reaches over, and opens a drawer. you can hear the sound of things knocking around inside as he roots his hand around, finally emerging with an eyeliner pen. through the mirror, you can see his hands splayed out over the space just under your breasts, pulling the skin over your ribcage taut. his tongue pokes out into the lower corner of his mouth as he places the tip of the pen to your skin. 

he loops once. skids the pen downwards. jerks it up harshly, ending off with jagged motions, each brush trailing ink on your skin. 

when he's done he leans backwards, raising his eyebrows, asking you wordlessly if this was finally enough. his signature on your body, next to the bruises and marks and last remnants of his cum on your skin. 

—

"haechan?" 

he doesn't respond, but a part of you expects it already – you've memorized the way he leaves. 

"why didn't you fuck that girl tonight?" 

he takes his time, taking a long sip from his bottle of wine. from where you lie on the bed, you can just see the broad frame of his back, his side profile as he looks out of the window and at the moon, bright in the sky, the milky glow illuminating his skin. without his makeup, he looked like just a boy – pretty features almost dainty on his face. it's his hands which break the facade, calloused and rough, with veins that make your head spin when you think about them for too long, holding the bottle up to his lips. 

"didn't feel like it." 

you think about his answer, blinking slowly from the sleepiness. "why did you fuck me?" 

he faces forward, away from you. "felt like it."  

"why?" 

"i'm beginning to question that too," he replies, bluntly.

hurt aches in your bones, as silence rings loud in your ears. "if you don't want me here i can just go," you say, softly, and you're sure your voice sounds as wounded as you feel. "you've cleaned me up. i can leave if you want." 

you can see him stiffen, his shoulders tensing up. 

"where's jaemin?" 

of course. sitting up, you wince at the ache between your legs. "he's probably asleep," you answer, bitterly. "but i can just call a cab –"

his back muscles tense, and then he's shifting from where he sits on the edge of the bed. sliding into the space next to you, he rests back against the headboard, legs stretched out over the sheets. a hand wraps around yours. 

"ask me easier questions," he mumbles, turning your palm over so he can lace your fingers together, giving them a reassuring squeeze. 

your breath stutters. 

"what did you talk about? with the band?" 

after cleaning you up and tucking you into bed, haechan had finally stalked out of the bedroom to talk to mark, jisung and jeno. he hadn't said a thing when he returned, holding a bottle of wine, placing it on the bedside table before stepping into the bathroom wordlessly to remove his makeup. 

haechan blinks down slowly at your intertwined hands. "they asked me what was going on." 

"what?" 

"i've been losing focus," he mumbles. "during shows and during rehearsal. and jeno noticed i kept ditching girls at parties, said it wasn't like me to not be fucking around at all." 

a beat. 

you bite your lip. "you're…you're losing focus?" 

but he just shakes his head. "they're wrong." 

you can see that the topic is upsetting him, so you rush to ask another question. "do you write any of the songs that the band play?" 

he raises his eyebrows. "so you care so much about the band now? does that mean you're a fan?" 

he ignores your mumbled excuse, squeezing your hand again to let you know he was teasing. "mark usually writes the songs," he answers. "i don't have much to write about." and then, with a little more force, "ask me questions about me, not the band."

"what does this tattoo mean?" you place the tip of your finger just below his ribcage, where there's a small doodle of a bear paw. 

"people say i look like a bear," he mumbles, a little shy. even in the moonlight, his pouty lips and round cheeks are evident, his shoulders broad as he slumps against the headboard. 

"i see it," you confirm, and a smile flickers on his face. 

"yeah?" he looks over at you, and his free arm loops around your shoulder, squeezing you into his side. his affection buzzes in your veins, as you try to divert his attention with another question. 

"and what does this tattoo mean?" your other hand comes up again, now to trace at the sunflower peeking out from the base of his neck, trailing down to his shoulder. 

he takes a deep breath. "my sister picked it." 

"sister?" 

"baby sister," he adds, softly. "she just turned six. this is her favorite flower." 

"oh." 

"why?" he tilts his head, bumping your own gently. "do i not seem like an older brother?" 

"i think…" you hum, contemplating. "not when you're onstage," you decide.

"do you think i'm different? from when i'm onstage?" 

"i don't know you enough to judge," you say, truthfully. aside from the sex, and from the brief moments right after when it felt like he was truly there, holding you, the haechan you knew was mostly the one flooded with stage lights, the kind of boy you had to beg to earn his attention. 

haechan goes quiet, his hand on yours stilling, and you turn to look at him. tension is filling up the room, slow and thick like a fog, and you can't breathe against the weight of everything — the weight of his gaze, the almost boyish way his eyes flick down to your lips and back up to meet yours. 

"do you want to?" 

you bite your lip. 

maybe two weeks ago your heart would have leapt, maybe you would have begged for the opportunity to have him closer. 

but your body has already had time to learn disappointment, to defend yourself against his callousness and his cold, learning the art of slipping in and out of intimacies. every line crossed, every boundary blurred. 

"do i want to?" you echo, and you see him falter. 

maybe his own words held more weight than he'd anticipated. 

"you don't?" 

or maybe he was just scared to hear your answer. 

"will you let me?" you reflect the question back to him. his fingers twitch against your shoulder where he's still holding you.

there were some nights where it felt as if he was taking his adrenaline out on your body, or where he was making you forget the fear of being caught by overriding your senses with pleasure. there were others when you fell so deep into a headspace, that he would care for you gently, something romantic and tender in the negative space between your bodies. 

and ultimately all of these nights ended the same – the same curl of his lip, his face closed-off, his voice too steady and unfeeling.

"how would you let me know you?" it's only when he flinches when you catch the harshness to your tone, your own words leaving a bitter aftertaste in your mouth. "by barely letting things slip every night?" 

"y/n…" it's not meant as a warning. your name is spoken softly, with an ache in it that makes goosebumps rise up your arms. "i thought you were fine." 

"i am," you insist, feeling defensive. "i'm fine with you pretending you don't know me, or when you disappear on the drive home." 

"y/n, –" 

"just…don't say things if you don't mean them," you finish, mumbling your words to mute the hurt in them. 

there's a long silence. 

and then, his voice, so delicate and fragile, like he was afraid his words would bruise the space between him and you. 

"we're playing at a bar this friday." 

you make a sound of confusion, and he continues on. "it's only for a few fans who won some sort of a lucky draw. they get to talk to us and get autographs." 

"i didn't enter," you cut in, but still he continues on, as if he was trying to get the words out before he lost his nerve.

"i'm inviting you now. and….and afterwards i'll leave with you and we can go to my place." he swallows. "my real apartment. not this one i share with the band." he lets out a shaky breath. "i don't… i don't usually bring girls there, if you can't tell."  

"but…" the wheels in your head are turning slowly, as you try to catch up with what he's saying. "but if i'm there… and it's such a small crowd…the band is going to see that i'm there. 

"they will," he confirms quietly. 

"they're going to know you invited me. because i'm not a fan." 

his lips twitch. "but you like me, no?" 

"i do," you concede, absentmindedly. "but i thought you said…the band…" 

"i don't think i really care about that anymore." his thumb dips low, brushing over the space under your ribs where his name is temporarily tattooed against your skin. "i…" he hesitates, before his thumb swipes against your skin again, and he takes a deep breath. "i told them about you. just now." 

you feel like you're falling – a sense of vertigo making your head spin.

"what did you say?" 

"just that…there was a you," he finished, lamely. "that we see each other more, but it's nothing." his hand squeezes yours, a gentle pulse. "nothing yet, anyway."

"i'll take it," you murmur, holding his hand clasped in both of yours and kissing him lightly on his fingertips. his face crumples, his chest caving in on itself with the weight of the tenderness he feels for you in that moment, and he leans in, tilting his head, eyes fluttering closed. 

he kisses you like it's a promise, close-lipped and earnest. it feels almost like the two of you are finally on even ground. 

— 

"what are you trying to do?" 

you jump, as the light in the small kitchenette flicks on. dirty dishes pile up in the sink, mugs scattered over the countertop, and the boy leaning against the fridge focuses his gaze on you. his voice is gentle, a mellow sort of sweetness undercut by the deepness of his voice. not in the way jisung's was deep, but a bass to it that gave it authority, one that the boy seldom had to use. 

"what do you mean?" 

jeno tilts his head. "y/n, do you know why haechan likes to fuck girls after his shows?" 

the sweetness on your tongue from haechan's kiss decays into bitterness. 

jeno doesn't seem to care. "he gets high off the feeling of the crowd. it's something he doesn't want to let go of, so he finds someone who adores him and makes them prove it." his eyes bore into yours, unblinking. "he doesn't care who he's with, y/n. he just likes the way they sound, screaming his name." 

"but why doesn't-" you choke. it  feels almost like you're betraying him. "why doesn't he date?" 

jeno raises his eyebrows, and you feel pathetic. it’s a long time before he finally answers.

"all the girls are only after the version of him onstage. it's him they like, and haechan's just extending the performance. would you want to date someone who only liked one side of you?"

"but i don't just like that side of haechan," you protest, weakly. even then, you don't know what other sides you're alluding to — was it his gentleness with you? how he always held you after? the one who let his baby sister pick his tattoos?

"y/n?" 

a soft voice sounds out from the corridor leading off into the bedrooms. sleep-ridden syllables mumbling out into the still air, calling your name. 

"where are you? is everything okay?"

jeno's looking at you with someone like pity in his eyes, the way your body turns towards his voice like an instinct. "haechan isn't even his real name, did you know that?" 

he crosses over to you, and places his mug into the sink behind your back. "try not to get too loud," he murmurs. "we're all tired." 

and as haechan pulls you into his warm embrace, palms wandering over your skin, you bite your tongue and keep as quiet as possible.

—

haechan's head snaps up as he sees the door swing open again and more girls wander into the bar. there are excited squeals and shouts as they spot the band, he can hear mark's warm laugh and see jisung's wave out of his peripheral vision. behind him, jeno's methodically checking on his drum kit, and haechan can feel his eyes on the back of his neck, as if he knew. 

his eyes scan the crowd again, praying he was wrong. but deep down he knows he would recognise your voice anywhere, be able to spot your features even in total darkness. 

and right now, you weren't there at all. 

his body goes on autopilot, muscle memory kicking in as he plays the chords, does his solos, nods along to the music. the crowd is frenetic, watching the way his eyebrows are drawn together, tonguing at his cheek, his lips downturned — the anger tense in his body making them whisper to themselves, wondering why this was part of his performance today. he keeps his expression slack as he signs autographs, nodding curtly towards fans as they bid him goodbye timidly, intimidated by his stormy gaze. 

he doesn't understand why it makes his insides twist, each time he searches the crowd and darts his eyes back to his guitar. maybe he'd just gotten used to seeing you front row at his shows. maybe that was all this was — and you were a bad habit he should have broken. 

it's what he tells himself as he lets his hands brush against the girl's as she holds her poster out to him, smiling a close-lipped smile, eyes dragging up and down his body excitedly. he lets her think it's a part of the performance, as he rails her in the bathroom of the bar, his eyes squeezed shut as she moans his name into the sink, trying to ignore the way her body didn't react at all like yours did, that his hands couldn't find purchase on her skin at all, and her voice made him want to crawl out of his skin. 

you were a bad habit he should break — at least that's what he tells himself to keep him sane.

taglist: @neochan, @ahncosette, @18shy @kittydollzz @jenoslutie @pussymode @yyfka @cheolctrl @jaeminsballs @mysummerhyuck @strawberrytyong @rosiejunnie @nctzen4eva @haechskies @wickedrei @sundamariis @simpforarmihn @liliansun @lanadreamie @nodisdino @angelwonie @foxydumps @manooffline @moonsmias @skzct7 @iscocohere @ficrecnctskz @smwhrinthehaze (sorry there were q a few i couldn't tag!)

Which one 🤔

I’m still questioning my health😀😭😭😂

It’s for kinktober by the way

Take out

Pairing: rockstar boyfriend haechan x fem! Reader

Genre: rockstar au, smut

Warnings: rockstar haechan, smut, hair pulling, doggy style kinda, haechan marking reader to let people that his, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it people!!!), aftercare, dom haechan if you squint. I think that’s it!!

Summary: your at the after party with boyfriend that is apart of a band until something unexpected happens

A/N: this is a request and I didn’t see it until today so I’m sorry babes and I hope you’re satisfied with this 🤧

MDNI 🔞

You’re at the after party with your boyfriend who was talking with his bandmates at the time but still keeping a close eye on you.

Your talking with your friend on the couch until a guy comes up “hey baby wanna dance with me” the rando says looking in your eyes with a smug smirk on his face “no thank you” you say in the most polite way you can tell him “awww come one just one dance and I’ll leave you alone ba-“ and before he can his words out haechan is standing behind “ i think she said no buddy” he says looking the guy dead in his eyes “ who they are you” slurring at the end of his words “I’m her boyfriend that’s who I am” he says putting his hand in his pockets “y/n get up and let’s go” he says looking at you.

You give your friend a farewell and walk away with your Boyfriend until a the guy tries to grab your hand but haechan grabs your hand and speeds up the pace, until your in the bathroom, he pulls you in the bathroom lock the door behind him and going straight for your neck “h-hycuck” you say when he bites a sensitive part of your neck, he bites and suck on the sensitive parts on your neck so hard that your covered in purple hickeys. He growls in your ear “relax baby just let me take care of you” he says wrapping your legs around his waist to carry you to the sink.

He lifts up your skirt moving your pantys to the side and sliding two fingers into your cunt easily cause your already soaking for him by his touch.

“So wet for me” he says against your ear, moving his fingers in and out of your cunt. You bite your lip to contain the noise so hard that you can taste your blood from your lip. After he’s down prepping you he pull down his black jeans along with his briefs.

he pulls you off the sink and turns you around so you are facing the mirror and your chest laying on the cold surface, he teases your entrance with his cock so much that you can’t hold your moans in anymore “h-hyuck s’to much” you say your Laying your done on the cold surface “don’t put your head look at the mirror” he says grasping you hair and making you look up “I’m gonna fuck you and your gonna look in the mirror or else you don’t get to cum princess” he says with a mischief smirk on his face.

He pushes his cock into making both of you moan in unison at how tight your walls clench around him “f-fuck baby I prepped you for my cock and your still tight” he says growling, he lets you adjust until he starts thrusting into you hard making you yelp at the sudden intrusion “f-fuck” you say keeping your eyes on your boyfriend behind you.

“F-faster p-please” you say your climax coming he then leans down onto you his chest against your back, his hand that not occupied with your slides under you and starts rubbing your bud fiercely “m’gonna c-cum” you say legs beginning to weaken. Biting down on your collarbone so hard that he was sure it was going to leave a mark “cum for me baby” he says thrusting into you more harder and rough then before “f-fuck” you say as your eyes roll to the back of your head and after a few more thrusts haechan cums into your gummy walls some leaking out of you cunt.

That’s when he comes back to reality and cleans you up “since I fucked you so hard that your legs hurt I think I should buy you some food” he says chuckling at how your limping towards the door “let me help you” he says wrapping your arm around him and walking out of the party, helping you get into the car “want some take out?” He says giving that beautiful smile you loved so much “sure”

THE END

©kpopcafeeee

as expected, jewel did it again ✨ i swear i always click the read more KNOWING you’re gonna rock my world and step on my face it’s just that good 💞 thank you so so much for thissss, i loved it to pieces gonna read a few million times again <3 <3

SURE THING (L.DH)

pairing. haechan x fem!reader

genre. smut…that’s it

word count. 11k

contents & warnings. drug use (weed) mentioned; reader partakes, oral (receiving), unprotected sex, fingering (receiving), mild dacryphilia, hair pulling (giving, receiving)

notes. this is the first time in maybe ever that i’ve (1) written a fic in chronological order (2) finished a fic this long this quickly. this may actually be a record for me! anyway, this fic is inspired by the following song lyrics!

girl, i love it when we high. do it turn you on, shawty? tell me if i’m wrong. i can see it in your eyes when you’re high that you feelin’ my vibes, baby, you ain’t gotta lie. i been waiting all day to get high with you, shawty, you know you my boo, i got all this weed for you, girl, let’s get high tonight, shawty, let’s get high, shawty. (high - pnb rock & dj luke nasty)

even when the sky comes fallin’, even when the sun don’t shine, i got faith in you and i; just put your pretty little hand in mine. (sure thing - miguel)

“Hey!” Jaemin greets you when he opens the front door to see you standing there patiently. He ushers you in, and not a moment too soon, because the shorts and blouse you chose to wear are definitely a flattering outfit, but maybe not the most sensible considering it’s almost midnight and there’s no sun to provide any warmth to your bare legs and slightly exposed midriff. “Did you seriously not wear a coat?”

“Yeah, I know, don’t tell Jeno.” You mumble, rubbing your arms to give yourself some warmth through the friction. “Thought I’d make it for the brief little walk from my house to Jeno’s.” You’re well aware that Jeno fusses over you not entirely unlike a mother, scolding you for your (many) bad choices and worrying over you. You weren’t fully thinking about wearing a coat when you were getting ready, and by the time you realized you’d left it at home, you were too far in your journey to consider turning back.

“You and I both know Jeno isn’t who you have to worry about,” Jaemin chuckles as he heads towards the kitchen with you on his heels. The further into the house you go, the more aware you become of your surroundings, the smoke swirling in the air from blunts, bongs, and bowls alike creating a fog that makes itself more prevalent in the light, and the smell of weed is strong—like, knock-you-off-your-damn-feet strong. 

“Is he here?” You ask, voice lowered surreptitiously as you approach the topic of the unnamed person you may or may not have come to see.

“Of course he’s here,” Jaemin snorts, moving to open the fridge and pulling out a can of soda. “He knew there was a chance you were coming.”

“Shut up,” You finally manage to mumble, shoving his shoulder and leaning your backside against the island countertop so you can maintain your glare in Jaemin’s direction.

“You know it’s true.” Jaemin teases, and you mumble bitterly under your breath, fidgeting with various aspects of your appearance until Jaemin swats at your hands. “Will you stop? You already look good, I promise!” 

“You know it’s true.” Jaemin teases, and you mumble bitterly under your breath, fidgeting with various aspects of your appearance until Jaemin swats at your hands. “Will you stop? You already look good, I promise!” 

“Not like I did this for you, anyway,” You huff, stilling after the words leave your mouth and meeting Jaemin’s smug gaze with a sheepish expression. “Shit.” You mutter, turning away from him and placing your palms on the countertop, the cool surface calming your nerves slightly. 

“Who’d you do it for, then?” Jaemin presses, and you shake your head vehemently, a small whine escaping you when he walks around to the other side of the island and mirrors your stance, now staring dead at your face. Even averting your gaze does nothing to protect you from his scrutiny, and you whine louder, even stomping your foot slightly. “Did you just stomp your foot?” He asks in amused disbelief, and you suck your teeth, glaring at him and looking away again. 

If you were watching Jaemin, you would have caught on when Jaemin’s eyebrows lifted in intrigue, eyes locked on something behind you, and a devilish little smile started to grow on his face. You don’t even notice as Jaemin looks over your shoulder repeatedly, your mind too caught up in trying to save face.

It’s when a warmth presses against your back and a hand appears from behind you and places itself beside your hand on the counter that you realize Jaemin was looking at something—or, you think as the presence behind you lets out a familiar chuckle, someone.

Haechan’s free hand tickles across the back of your thighs, only satisfied when you squirm slightly, and continues up to rest just under the hem of your shorts, fingers ghosting along the closest patch of skin to your ass that Haechan can get away with touching. His physical attention only lasts for a moment, his hand stilling when you look behind you and lock eyes with him. He’s as devastatingly attractive as always, dark hair messily tousled off of his forehead and revealing his eyebrows, which he wiggles at you in a flirtatious greeting, the corner of his mouth curling upwards into a crooked grin. 

“Hi,” You greet him quietly, mirroring his smile, and he moves his hand from not-quite-your-ass and shifts beside you to mirror your position.

“Hey,” He replies in kind, eyes shamelessly scanning your body and lingering in a way that makes the chill of the night air you braved all worth it. “You come alone?”

“Yeah.” You answer, tossing a glance in Jaemin’s direction to see that he’s nowhere to be found. “It’s a short commute.”

“That’s not safe,” Haechan points out, and you hum in acknowledgement. “Let me know next time, and I’ll come get you.”

“Well, aren’t you sweet?” You chuckle with a teasing lilt, and Haechan snickers.

“As sugar,” He answers, grinning cheekily.

“Oh! That reminds me,” You say with a start, turning slightly to face him. “Do you have edibles?” You bat your lashes at him as prettily as you can, and he raises an eyebrow, laughing quietly to himself.

“Of course I do,” He answers you with an assuring smile.

“Do you have the gummy ones?” You ask, and he chuckles, reaching into his back pocket and pulling out something that crinkles familiarly, your eyes lighting up as you reach for his emerging hand. 

“Anything for my girl.” He hums, and your eyes roll back into your head as you groan quietly in delight—you’re reacting to the affectionate term, but thankfully have something to mask it with—and take the proffered gummy from his hand, popping it into your mouth. The odd little aftertaste of the gummy is your indicator that there isn’t just sugar in the treat, and it fades away as you chew, only the sweetness lingering on your tongue once you’ve swallowed.

“I like that,” You muse, and he hums in question. “‘Anything for my girl,’” You mimic his voice, and he laughs openly at that, eyes twinkling with mirth when they refocus on you.

“Is that really what I sound like?” He asks, amused, and you shake your head.

“Nope—I promise you sound much hotter than that.” You assure him, and his eyebrows raise, eyes widening slightly in an impressed expression.

“Oh, really?” He presses, and you nod, smiling.

“Your voice is so hot,” You confess, blinking heavy-lidded eyes at him as he raises an eyebrow at you. “Especially when it’s all low and croaky after you smoke and shit.”

“Mhm?” Haechan leans closer to you, moving the hand closest to you to the other side of you, trapping you in his embrace.

“Yeah,” You sigh, the word coming out a bit more dreamily than you would have liked as you lean back somewhat so your back is to his chest and turn to look at him. “You could probably make me do anything when you talk like that.”

“Oh, yeah?” He murmurs, leaning over so his lips are right by your ear. “Mm…take your shirt off.” He purrs, a teasing cadence to his voice, and a snort escapes you before you can stop it. “Kidding,” He chuckles, and your amusement bubbles over as you reach a hand up to cover your mouth to contain the laughter that spills out.

“You play too much,” You chuckle, shaking your head, and he scrunches his face up in disdain.

“I play just enough,” He counters and you turn all the way around to face him so he gets the full view of your very deliberate eye roll. He chuckles and steps closer to you, hands moving to rest on either side of you but significantly closer, deliberately not casual at this point. “When are you gonna come visit me, hm?” His voice softens to a murmur as he leans in closer to you, the warmth of his breath fanning over your cheek before his lips are grazing your earlobe and his cheek brushes up against yours. “Let me smoke you out.”

“You know I’m more of an—”

“Edibles girl,” Haechan finishes with you, smiling. “All the more reason to come visit me. You can either get your little gummy high,” He teases with an audible grin, “or you can smoke and try new things,” Haechan finishes, pulling back to look you directly in the eyes, and you have a feeling he might not be talking about the weed anymore. “It’s a whole different kind of high, angel.” His eyes are trained unwaveringly on yours, unnerving you so deeply that you have to start manually reminding yourself to blink. “I won’t even laugh if you cough and splutter.” He raises one hand up and nods with an air of solemnity and you huff, pushing his chest with a finger. He beams at you and places his hand back on the counter, caging you in once more.

“I know how to smoke, Haechan,” You inform him. “I just don’t like it as much.”

“When have you ever smoked, angel?” He’s eying you with a skeptical half-smile, and you narrow your eyes at him playfully, your lips quivering as you attempt to contain your smile.

“I smoked before I met you. I smoked the day that I met you, actually.” You point out, and his brows furrow thoughtfully as he thinks back. “I haven’t always had a hot guy magically appearing wherever I go with gummy edibles, you know.” You tease, and, by the way his body tenses, you’re pretty sure the compliment wasn’t lost on him.

“Did you just call me hot?” Haechan asks carefully.

“I dunno,” You reply nonchalantly, shrugging and looking away, your lips winning as they stretch into a smile. “That was so long ago, I don’t remember. I live in the now.” Haechan doesn’t say anything for a confusingly long time, so you look back to him to see that he’s watching you with an intent, amused stare, one not unlike a lion watching a gazelle, and if looks could talk, you feel like his would say, “I can’t wait to get you alone.”

“It’s rude to stare,” You quietly scold him in a playful cadence, and he shrugs, gaze unwavering.

“I’m not sorry.”

“You’re wicked.” You huff out an incredulous laugh, and he grins.

“I am,” He agrees. “What would you say if I asked you to come with me somewhere?”

“I would say that I’ve seen stuff like this on Dateline and 48 Hours.” You joke, and he exhales sharply in amusement, clearly not expecting you to say anything of the sort. “Kidding,” You smile widely, and he looks at you, tongue peeking out to wet his lips slowly. “I’d ask where we’re going.”

“I need a new lighter,” Haechan replies, pulling out his old one and trying to turn it on several times to no avail. You look upward, feigning a thoughtful expression, and he groans, laughing as he pushes off the counter entirely and takes your hand in his free one. “Come on, pretty,” He purrs. “How about a little midnight adventure?”

“…Fine.” You decide finally, and he grins widely, squeezing your hand briefly before he starts to tug you after him, only to stop when he realizes that you’re not moving. “I’m only going because I want gummy sharks.” You inform him matter-of-factly, and he laughs, nodding. 

“Noted.”

“You should know better than to go out this late with no coat.” Haechan grouches, shrugging off his jacket and draping it over your shoulders.

“And they say chivalry is dead.” You push your arms through the sleeves and you two keep walking to the convenience store. 

“What do you mean?” Haechan chuckles.

“Well, first you offered to drive me to Jeno’s,” You explain, “then you brought the gummy edibles you know I like; now you’re giving me your jacket—you’re a real gentleman, huh?”

“Ah, I wouldn’t say that, really.” Haechan sounds somewhat like he’s up to something, and you cast him a suspicious sideways glance. The small smirk on his face as he meets your gaze levelly reveals nothing, and you huff softly.

“Why not?”

“There’s actually something in it for me.” He explains, and you squint in confusion.

“What’s that?” You ask curiously.

“I get to show off to people just how good you look in my jacket.” He answers with a grin, and you can’t hide the smile that pulls at the corners of your mouth.

“Oh, yeah? And ‘just how good’ do I look, Haechan?” You ask, and he chuckles, the sound a little darker than you’re used to it being, and the shift sends a thrill of excitement down your spine.

“Too good for your own good,” He replies, that same little edge to his voice that has piqued the interest of something in your subconscious. “Now, I want you to take my jacket off.”

“Take it off?” You cock your head to the side, confused.

“Take my jacket off…among…other things…” Haechan muses, and realization, giddiness, and nervousness crash over you like waves as Haechan slowly and deliberately moves towards you and backs you up against a random building.

“Oh,” You breathe, your chest tightening as you look anywhere but at him, his dark stare too intent for you.

“Oh,” Haechan chuckles as he mocks your tone. One hand leaves the exterior of the building behind you and drops down to toy with the hem of your shorts but not before grazing the peek of skin revealed by your blouse. “Look so pretty tonight, angel.”

“Thanks,” You mumble, your mouth and throat feeling dry for entirely weed-unrelated reasons. 

“Did you get all dressed up for me tonight?” Haechan leans forward to nose at your jaw, tilting your head away from him to give himself access to your neck. It feels like time slows to a stop as he exhales against your skin, goosebumps rising virtually everywhere else, and he presses forward into you ever so slightly. Haechan dawdles around actually pressing his lips to your neck, grazing one or both of his lips against the skin, nuzzling it with the tip of his nose, and you’re about to ask what in the hell he’s waiting for, when you remember that he asked you a question and realize he’s waiting for your answer.

“Yes,” You exhale in a large breath you’d been holding, and Haechan hums in satisfaction, leaning forward and pressing his lips to your neck in a lingering kiss that has desire spreading through you like wildfire, your fingers curling in excitement.

“Mm, how lucky am I, hm? The prettiest girl at that whole party got all cute and dressed up for me.” He coos, words hot against your neck as he alternates between speaking and pressing slow, languid kisses to the skin. “Makes me feel special.” 

“You are special,” You say honestly, thanking the powers that be that your reply sounded more casual than simpering.

“Oh, you’re so sweet, angel.” He murmurs against your skin. His tongue slowly traces a stripe up your neck and your breath hitches in surprise, your hand flying up to loosely grab onto his shirt, your fist uselessly clutching the fabric that’s supposed to be covering his chest. “So sweet,” He repeats, and you practically shudder in delight. “I’m special?” Haechan asks with a lopsided grin, lifting his head so you two are face-to-face and his gaze drops from your eyes to your lips almost immediately as the smile starts to fade from his face. 

“Yeah,” Your voice is barely above a hushed murmur, but the stillness of the night around you carries your voice just to where it needs to be.

“How special?” Haechan urges, his tone playful, challenging, and devilish all at once.

“H-How—huh?” You ask, thrown off by the question.

“How special am I, angel?” Your lips are practically touching, but Haechan somehow manages to manipulate the space between you two and stretch it even more. His other hand drops off of the wall to wind his arm around your waist, the following tug from him that sends you tumbling forward into his chest eliciting a gasp from you. “Hm?”

You can barely open your eyes, lids heavy with desire, but you can tell one thing: Haechan is about to kiss you.

His lips slowly tease yours apart, his grip around your waist tightens, and Haechan lets out a soft little groan of “Finally,” before connecting your mouths. Your lips are connected for what must be four very blissful seconds, and you’re just about to start committing this to memory when a loud whooping noise from across the street startles you so much that you almost bite down on Haechan’s lip. Haechan sighs deeply, his head dropping down in frustration for a moment before he turns to look at the culprit, which appears to be a random guy in a group of people all walking down the street together.

“Ah, don’t stop now!” The guy calls out encouragingly, and you can hear the slur in his voice telling you that you’re all some sort of not-sober, but you just picked different poisons. You and Haechan don’t acknowledge the last comment from the intoxicated stranger, both of you laughing it off as he slowly unwinds himself from you, letting you straighten yourself out before you two finish out the trek to the convenience store.

As you reach the storefront, Haechan opens the door and holds it for you, following after you. In contrast to the dark of the night sky, the harsh bright white lighting of the convenience store makes you squint slightly upon entering, barely making out the figure of the present worker enough to shoot her a friendly wave and greeting.

She returns your greeting kindly, but when your vision finally adjusts to the store’s lighting, you can see that she only has eyes for Haechan, following his every move around the store like a hawk. You know that look. You give him that look. 

She wants him and, honestly, you can’t blame her—Haechan manages to make even looking at different lighters a deeply attractive action. 

“Can I help you find anything?” The cashier asks, and you turn to pipe up that you’re fine when you realize that the question wasn’t even directed at you, her eyes still trained on an oblivious Haechan.

“I’m good, thanks,” Haechan mumbles distractedly.

“Okay! Let me know,” She offers, and you huff quietly to yourself. 

“‘Let me know,’” You mock the worker’s voice under your breath, making some accompanying teasing faces to yourself. “Didn’t even ask if I needed help finding anything.” You grouch. “I would’ve said yes, too, because I can’t even find the goddamn gummy sharks—oh, here they are.”

You’re so engrossed in your thoughts and your hunt for all the gummies and snacks your heart desires that you don’t notice Haechan approaching you until his breath is against the back of your neck and you jolt violently, whipping your head around to glare at a mischievously grinning Haechan. 

“Don’t mind me.” He raises his hands as if to show his harmlessness, and you narrow your eyes at him suspiciously before turning back to your task at hand. He follows your every move as if he just got the job of your personal shadow as you walk along the aisle, compiling gummy snack after snack and his constant, literal breathing down your neck occasionally tickles you into letting out a giggle, only spurring him on further.

“Did you get your gummy sharks?” He asks, amused, and you spare him a glance over your shoulder. 

“Of course I got my gummy sharks.” You scoff lightheartedly, and he grins, nodding in approval.

“Good girl,” He murmurs suggestively in your ear, moving just out of your reach when you move to swat him in surprise.

When you’re satisfied with the inventory of snacks you’ve gathered, you head over to the register and place the almost mountainous pile of snacks on the counter with a sheepish smile.

“Will this be all?” The worker asks politely, and you nod, barely noticing her attention shifting to behind you before Haechan is standing right beside you, placing his lighter and a bottle of soda with your pile of snacks and handing the cashier his card without a word to you.

“Wh–Haechan!” You exclaim, looking at him incredulously as he turns to look at you, meeting your gaze calmly with an eyebrow raised inquisitively. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know. I wanted to.” Haechan answers simply, shrugging as he takes the bag the cashier prepared for you both.

“If I’d known you were gonna do that, I would’ve gotten way less stuff.” You frown, and he coos sympathetically.

“It’s okay; you can just make it up to me someday.” He says with a devilish grin, and you swallow thickly.

“That makes me nervous.” You mumble, and Haechan chuckles, leaning closer to your ear.

“I like you nervous,” He admits in a low murmur, and you make an affronted noise. “It’s cute.”

“Have a nice night,” You both say to the cashier, but she’s only looking at Haechan, making irritation bubble up inside of you.

“You too,” She says to you absentmindedly before refocusing her attention on Haechan. “What’s your name?” Her tone seems to have changed entirely from the professional, “customer service” voice she was using with you to a more playful, lilting, flirtatious one with Haechan.

“Haechan,” He answers with a smile, slightly distracted as he fishes through the bag for the lighter he just purchased.

“Have a good night, Haechan.” She gives him a simpering smile, and you fight the urge to scowl. Surely you don’t look this pathetic when you look at him, right? 

“Thank you…Lily.” He smiles as he leans in to read her name tag, and you can see the excitement wash over her, your irritation only building, now directed at Haechan for either not realizing he’s being flirted with or for flirting back. 

You take the bag from his hand and shoot the cashier a tight-lipped smile as you exit the store, Haechan right behind you.

As Haechan lights up a joint he pulled from who knows where, you rummage through the bag for a pack of gummy sharks, opening them immediately upon finding them and putting one in your mouth, chewing grumpily. 

“You ready?” Haechan asks, and you nod, barely looking at him. As you two start walking, he offers you the joint which you accept begrudgingly, figuring your high needs a little jumpstart. 

“Look at you, branching out,” Haechan chuckles, and you shoot him a side-eyed glance, not in the mood for joking around with him. 

You take two pulls of the joint and hold each one in until you feel that dull ache in the back of your throat before exhaling slowly. Not before long, the effects seem to have started already, the joint mixing in with the gradually-taking-effect edible as a serenity overtakes your mind, a dopey little smile coming to your face. 

When you go to hand the joint back, you look at Haechan and are reminded all over again of the petty little reason you’re upset with him, the irritation not as strong now that the weed’s more in your system, the feeling having morphed into a more petulant annoyance. You two walk in silence before you hear a small chuckle that warrants a sideways look at your walking companion, granting you with the knowledge that Haechan is looking directly at you, studying your features with a sort of calm amusement.

“Look somewhere else.” You grouch, and Haechan snickers around the joint, smoke coming out of his nose briefly before he composes himself and exhales fully.

“And where did this little attitude come from, hm?” Haechan asks lightheartedly, and your brows furrow in aggravation.

“Oh, I don’t know,” You counter with a pointed huff. “Maybe I picked it up at the convenience store while you and the cashier—I believe her name was Lily—were flirting and exchanging names and shit.” The laugh Haechan lets out startles you and you glare at him petulantly. “What’s so funny?”

“I wasn’t flirting,” Haechan explains to you as calmly as he can, “I was being friendly.” His words comfort you somewhat before—“I think it’s cute that you’re jealous, though.”

“I–what? Jealous? I’m not jealous!” You exclaim defensively, far too vehemently to be even remotely convincing.

“Mm, yeah, sure.” He chuckles. “C’mere.” He wraps an arm around your waist, grabbing you firmly as he pulls you closer into his side. “Why are you jealous, angel? You know, I’d literally make out with you in front of her if that’ll help.”

“Haechan, shut up.” You can’t help but laugh at the notion, only spurring him on further.

“I’m serious; we can go back right now.” Haechan offers, and you roll your eyes, now feeling significantly better.

“It’s fine,” You insist.

“Good. Does that mean you’ll stop sulking, as cute as it was to witness?” He asks, and you frown one more time for good measure before letting your features relax. “Good,” He praises you, albeit a bit patronizingly, as you two approach Jeno’s doorstep once more. He knocks and the door opens almost immediately, Haechan catching it and jerking his chin towards the inside of the house as he tells you to enter first. “It’s a bit of a shame though,” He says as you pass by him, and you look at him curiously. “I almost got the chance to kiss you until that pretty little pout went away.” He muses thoughtfully, and your breath catches in your throat, all banter dying on your tongue as your mind is flooded with thoughts of Haechan kissing you, the way his lips felt earlier for those four blissful seconds, how firm his grip around your waist was—

“What?” Haechan asks with a growing grin as he shuts the door behind himself and locks it. “No witty remark from my girl? Nothing clever to come back with?” He’s teasing you and if you had your wits more about you, you’d be able to handle it, but your mind is otherwise occupied.

“Shut up.” You huff, turning your nose up and walking further into the house, making a beeline for the kitchen to grab a cup of water or something to calm your nerves. When you get to the kitchen, you realize a bit belatedly that Haechan isn’t still with you, an exhale of both relief and disappointment leaving you as you realize he must have gotten pulled away by a friend of his or something. 

You lean your back against the fridge and close your eyes, breathing in deeply as you try to make sense of your feelings and your high, your mind a bit fuzzy as you wrap your head around everything that’s occurred. Your moment of tranquility doesn’t last long; your name is called, just loudly enough to be heard amidst the music and people talking, and sternly enough that you know exactly who the voice belongs to.

“Is that all you wore to this? That’s not even your jacket, it’s Haechan’s—are you telling me you didn’t bring a jacket?” Jeno is in front of you in what feels like an instant, the blond male staring you down in both concern and disapproval.

“Oh, boy,” You heave a heavy sigh as Jeno prepares to launch into his rant about infectious illnesses and the importance of dressing for the weather.

After a while of wandering around the party, catching up with some people you haven’t seen in a while, and talking to some friends you run into, you find yourself walking to Jeno’s back door and exiting into his backyard, needing a break from the smoke clouds and stifling weed smell. You’ve barely set both soles on the wooden back porch when you catch sight of the only other person outside with, apparently, the same idea as you, and your heart skips a beat as the person’s features become more prominent as your eyes adjust to the new lighting.

“Haechan?” You ask, thankfully concealing the swell of hope and excitement in your chest, and he turns around, gaze falling on you and his lips quirking up into a grin.

“Well, well, well.” Haechan drags the syllables out as you walk over to where he’s standing, his hands resting on the railing. “What a sight for sore eyes.”

“What are you doing out here by yourself?" You ask curiously, mirroring his position and facing out into Jeno’s mostly empty backyard, and Haechan turns his head to the side to look at you, his crooked smile never leaving his face.

"Waiting for you to follow me." He answers, and you scoff in amused disbelief, nudging him with your shoulder.

“How was I supposed to know where you went?" You question, confusion pushing to the forefront of your thoughts and emotions. Haechan looks at you with a patronizing lifting of his eyebrows and gestures towards himself pointedly.

"You found me, didn't you?"

You exhale loudly in amusement and roll your eyes, a laugh escaping you as you ask, “I’m serious! What brought you out here, for real?”

“I don't really know…” Haechan muses thoughtfully, his expression pensive. “What about you? Maybe your answer will inspire me.” He says jokingly, and you shrug, fingers distractedly running over the wooden railing and feeling all the different smooth and rough textures, your index finger thoughtfully tracing around a small piece of wood that sticks up, almost having given you a splinter.

“I guess I got bored and started wandering around and, well–here I am." You answer, and Haechan grins widely at you, leaning forward so he’s invading your personal space, his face directly in front of yours.

“Aww, did you miss me?” He asks teasingly, and you groan, rolling your eyes.

Yes. “No.”

“Mm, I don’t believe you.”

Good; you shouldn’t. “Well, you should.”

“That hurts, angel,” He feigns a hurt look, and you laugh as he clutches his chest and winces. “I thought I was special.” His word choice is nothing short of intentional, and your mind flashes back, yet again, to the moment you two shared earlier on the way to the convenience store.

“God, you know, you're lucky you're cute." You huff thoughtlessly, barely able to keep an annoyed expression in favor of the smile that keeps threatening to peek out, and you promptly freeze after you’ve spoken, eyes wide. 

Maybe he didn’t hear anything.

You look to your side to see Haechan staring directly at you with his eyebrows raised and a growing smirk.

"I’m sorry, what was that you said?" Haechan asks, tone laden with intrigue, and you swallow, plucking the could-have-been splinter from the railing and flicking it over the edge.

“…Nothing?" You try hopefully, and Haechan shakes his head.

“Nope.” 

“Haechan, I’m too sober for this,” You complain, and he hums in acknowledgement.

“Your high fading?” He questions, and nods in understanding at your hum of assent. ”I got you. Come with me.” Haechan’s fingers loop around your wrist and he starts to lead you back into the house party, stopping and looking back when he realizes you’re not moving for the second time tonight.

“We just got back!” You point out with a small laugh, and he shrugs dismissively, stepping closer to you. (His hand slips down from your wrist to lace his fingers with yours, the gesture forward enough that it sends butterflies up from your stomach into your throat yet subtle enough that you can safely choose, for your own sake, not to comment on it.)

“I don’t care,” Haechan replies plainly, his dark brown eyes practically pinning you in place with the intensity of his stare. “I want you all to myself.”

“How greedy of you.” You tease, and he groans, tossing his head back before looking at you again.

“Come on, don’t make me beg.” He urges, and your eyebrows raise before you even notice they have, a mischievous little smile growing on your face.

“Well, now that you mention it, I’d love to see you beg.” You taunt, and Haechan huffs and rolls his eyes, his grip on your hand tightening as he tugs you along with him.

“You’re lucky you’re so cute,” He mutters under his breath, and you pick up your feet at that, walking forward so you’re right next to him and can get a good side-view of his face.

“What was that?” You echo his words from earlier, and Haechan, to your surprise, turns and looks you directly in the eyes.

“I said that you’re lucky you’re so cute.” He repeats himself, and you open and close your mouth after realizing you don’t know what to say. “Yeah. Thankfully one of us can actually own up to their words.” He gives you a playfully pointed look and continues weaving through the crowd, both of you exiting the front door yet again.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You bluff, and Haechan snorts.

“What a coincidence.” He comments in a deadpan tone.

You two head down the street, led by Haechan’s navigating skills, and you’re about to ask where exactly you two are headed when you look at Haechan’s side profile and find yourself distracted by his full lips. Your mind blanking, your thoughts are filled, for the umpteenth time, with thoughts of Haechan’s lips on yours, your cheek, jaw, neck, and maybe even lower–

“Don’t do that.” Haechan’s voice cuts through your reverie, and you blink at him in confusion, your head tilting to the side. His free hand comes up to your mouth and he tugs your bottom lip free from between your teeth where you suppose you’d been absentmindedly nibbling at it while thinking about kissing Haechan.

“Why not?” You ask, trying to keep the challenging edge out of your voice.

“You know what?” Haechan chuckles, his thumb grazing your chin as he drops his hand back to his side (you’re reminded once more that Haechan still hasn’t let go of your hand from earlier, but you’re not complaining) and faces front again. You finally realize where you two were heading as Haechan’s car comes into view, and you look at Haechan curiously, waiting not-so-patiently for the rest of his statement. He leans in to you, his lips brushing against the skin of your cheek before he reaches his destination of your ear where, to your surprise, he nips at your earlobe, a hitched gasp escaping you at the sudden sensation. Haechan’s next words are murmured in a low tone, but they’re saddled with so much confidence and assertion that they send a thrill of excitement down your spine and a warm rush of arousal blooming from your belly to the rest of your body.

“Fuck around and find out.”

#####

Haechan comes to stand directly in front of you and reaches for your chest, pausing when you yelp in surprise before continuing to reach into a pocket you didn’t know existed in his jacket, pulling out a small baggie of weed and a pack of rolling papers with a raised eyebrow.

“Oh,” You mumble softly, and Haechan chuckles.

“Oh.” He mimics you with a teasing smile, gesturing to the front of his car and you tilt your head to the side in confusion. “Sit.” He clarifies, and you comply, shrugging his jacket off enough so you can sit on it and shield the undersides of your bare legs from the cold metal of the hood of his car. What you don’t expect is for Haechan to move so he’s standing directly in front of you and to place his bag of weed and the rolling papers on one of your thighs. At your confused spluttering once he starts to roll the joint on your lap, he looks up at you with an expression so naturally questioning and expectant that it makes you wonder for a moment if this is normal and you’ve just been missing out.

“You’re making it on my leg.” You point out quietly, and he nods patronizingly. 

“I am. The hood of my car isn’t clean for me to make something that’s gonna go in our mouths.” He explains, and you nod in understanding. “Tongue out,” Haechan urges, and your eyes widen in disbelief, your brows furrowing in confusion. “Need you to seal the joint, angel.” He sighs in mock annoyance but you can see the beginnings of a fond smile on his lips.

“Why can’t you do it?” You ask curiously.

“Mouth feels dry,” He explains and you nod, figuring that’s as good of an answer as any.

“I don’t know which part to wet, though,” You say worriedly, and he shushes you softly.

“I’ll do all the work,” He assures you. “I just need you to be good and stick that little tongue out for me.” You try (and fail) to disregard the arousing factor to what he’s said, heat rushing to your face nonetheless and warming your cheeks as you shyly avert your gaze and let your tongue loll out of your mouth. “That’s it,” He mumbles encouragingly and drags the edge of the unsealed joint against your tongue carefully, his breath audibly catching when the side of his thumb makes contact with your tongue.

His caught off-guard response emboldens you somewhat, your eyes meeting his again and when his other thumb nears your tongue as he brings the paper from end to end, you flick your tongue against his thumb so subtly that you could deny it if he asked, but enough to make Haechan clear his throat thickly. He pulls the paper away from you, stepping back somewhat, and his gaze darkens as he watches you close your mouth and—

“What’d I say about that lip?” Haechan reminds you as he finishes rolling the joint, and you shrug carelessly.

“Can’t control it,” You counter with an edge to your voice that dares him to call you on it. 

He blinks at you impassively. “Maybe you should learn to control it before I can’t control myself.” His voice is barely above a mutter, but you hear him clear as day, a triumphant little smile appearing on your face. Haechan pulls out his lighter and brings the joint to his lips, lighting it and taking a couple of pulls. When he moves to pass it to you, he stops short at the look in your eyes and narrows his own. “Don’t look at me like that.” 

“Like what?” You ask with an innocent smile and sideways tilt of the head.

“Like you’re up to something.” He replies suspiciously, and you raise your hands defensively. “Come on,” Haechan drags the syllables out, stepping closer to you with a plaintive frown on his unbearably handsome face. “Tell me what you’re hiding, and…I’ll tell you what I’m hiding.” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively, and you pause, thinking it over.

“Mm…deal.” You finally reply, and his eyes widen in surprise as a wide smile takes over his features. 

“Don’t lie to me,” He warns you, and you frown, slightly offended.

“I would never lie to you.” You say sincerely. “Well—not a serious lie. Might lie for a joke or something.”

“I guess that’s pretty fair,” Haechan reasons. “Now tell me.”

You take a deep breath and steady your nerves as you prepare to speak, and Haechan leans forward, ready to hang on your every word.

“There’s…something…that I really, really want right now.” You say carefully, conveniently omitting the two facts that the something is a someone and that the very someone is standing directly in front of you.

“Yeah?” Haechan breathes, his hand falling to your knee as he brings the joint to your lips in a silent offer. You lean forward and take it into your mouth, taking a pull, and as you hold the smoke inside of you for as long as you can bear it, he speaks again. “What is that something?”

“…I feel like I’ve said too much already,” You balk as you exhale, backing out as you realize there really isn’t any way to avoid approaching the topic of your not-so-little crush on the male standing in front of you. Even if everyone knows, it’s an entirely different situation to admit to it.

“Oh, come on,” Haechan complains, and you start to whine loudly in protest.

“I don’t want to—”

“But you barely said anything,” Haechan laments, and you frown deeply.

“It’s embarrassing.” You gripe.

“Aw, the poor baby.” Haechan mocks your whining, which subsequently only makes your whining worse. 

“It’s not funny!” You whine, pushing at his chest lightly. 

“I’m not laughing!” He’s still mocking your voice with a wicked grin on his face, and you groan, glowering at him petulantly.

“You’re mean.” You huff, and Haechan snorts, leaning forward to your ear.

“You know you like it.” He replies with a cocky grin, and you pause, your whole brain feeling like it’s crashed, rebooted, and crashed again as the flirtatious words rattle around in your head. Haechan pulls back from you slowly and you two stare each other down, your eyes drifting down to his lips for the millionth time, and—

“You’re doing that on purpose, aren’t you?” Haechan asks in a low, serious voice, and you blink twice, startled. You go to speak and realize that you were nibbling at your bottom lip again, the gesture not going unnoticed by Haechan, who is staring intently at your mouth.

“No?” You answer, confused.

“I feel like you are.” Haechan scrutinizes your slightly lost expression as he continues speaking, “I mean, you know what it does to me–”

“No, I don’t.” You butt in, and Haechan raises his eyebrows skeptically.

“No? You don’t know? Let me give you a hint.” Haechan’s hand on your knee slips up your leg to grip your thigh, and he guides your knee to press against the front of his pants, causing you to inhale sharply at the feeling of your knee pressed against his very firm erection. “You feel that?” His voice is low and breathy, and you keen weakly before responding.

“Yeah,” You say, nodding distractedly as your mind swirls with thoughts and desires of Haechan’s hands and lips all over you, of him pushing into you and filling you up nice and deep—you’re a goner at this point.

“That’s what it does to me—what you do to me.” Haechan asserts firmly.

“Fuck.” When Haechan goes to move back, you’re moving before you can even register it, wrapping your legs around his waist and locking him back into close quarters with you. “Don’t move,” You plead breathlessly. “Please.”

“Pretty girl wants me to stay, yeah?” He asks softly, tone saccharine sweet with feigned pity, and you nod, whining quietly as your legs tighten. “My pretty girl wants to feel me pressed up against her, right? You want to feel my cock pressing against your leg?” At your vehement nod, Haechan chuckles darkly and puts out the now forgotten joint, tucking it into the jacket pocket he got the weed from earlier. “How does this feel, hm?” His hand moves up from your knee to your thigh to right between your legs, cupping your core through your shorts, and you moan lowly, rocking your hips forward into his palm. “Yeah, you like that, don’t you?”

“Yes–”

“Is this it, pretty girl? This what you wanted earlier?” His fingers deftly unbutton your shorts, dragging the zipper down painfully slowly before guiding his hand into them, digits tracing up and down your clothed core over the very warm, very damp seat of your underwear, the fabric now soaked with your arousal.

“Yes, Haechan, please–” You grip at the front of his shirt, pulling him to you with a desperate moan. Haechan moves just as quickly as you do, and when your lips connect, he kisses you so passionately that he all but melts your brain, his arm wrapping around you and pulling you against him in a crushing embrace that slowly starts squeezing the wind out of you.

“Fucking finally,” He growls into your mouth, and you cry out when his teeth sink into your bottom lip. “That feel good?” He grunts as his fingers massage slow, heavy circles around your clit, and you nod eagerly but buck against him, still eager for more. “Now who’s greedy?” He taunts you, and you huff, trying to slow the movement of your hips to no avail. His tongue parts your lips more, slipping in and tasting the inside of your mouth slowly and deliberately, a stark contrast to the way his lips were just ravaging yours a moment ago.

“God, Haechan, fuck,” You hiss when his hand sneaks into your underwear and starts to play with your clit, and he groans loudly, so loudly that you feel the need to look around and observe your surroundings to ensure your privacy.

“Aw, poor baby,” Haechan mumbles with a teasing pout, still matching your whiny lilt before he’s pressing himself against you and connecting your lips with his. “What am I going to do with you? So wet, you’re making a mess.” He pushes away from you abruptly, hand leaving your core, which is now clenching around nothing, to grip the front of the waist of your shorts and pull you forcefully to the edge of the hood of his car. He dives back in with his mouth, this time targeting your neck with wet, open-mouthed kisses, teeth dragging against your skin as his free hand gropes freely at your chest, kneading your breast in his palm and snaking up your shirt to trace teasingly light flicks and circles around your slowly pebbling nipple. 

“Wanna taste you,” He mutters gruffly before dropping to his knees unceremoniously, hands roughly yanking at your shorts as they jerkily come down your legs. He drops them carelessly on the ground and pulls your underwear down much slower and more carefully than he had your shorts, thankfully. “You know how long I’ve been thinking about this, angel?”

“No,” You answer, breathless as he stares up at you from his place between your legs.

“Longer than I can even remember.” He groans, reaching up and spreading you open with two fingers. Your face burns with embarrassment as he gazes at your exposed core, and the heat only intensifies when you look at him and see the intense look of desire and even hunger. “You always tease me, pretty girl.”

“I don’t,” You protest, but any other words die on your tongue as he leans forward and swipes his tongue up your folds, a sharp gasp leaving you instead. “Fuck,” You groan, and he matches the sound inadvertently as he shuffles forward and licks you again, moving to drape one of your thighs over his shoulder before tucking his face between your thighs and lapping at your arousal greedily. 

“All mine now,” He grunts in satisfaction, and you can only shudder in response, pleasure coursing through you starting from your core. His nose nudges your clit while his tongue busies itself with flicking his tongue over your entrance and a low hiss of pleasure escapes you, your hips bucking up into his face before you can stop yourself. He takes the hint incredibly well and drags his tongue up to your clit slowly, studying your reaction with curious eyes. “Like that?” He teases before swirling his tongue around your clit, slowly at first, then more and more rapidly as your breathing picks up. 

“Like that,” You breathily confirm with a vigorous nod of your head, and he chuckles, wrapping his lips around your clit and starting to suck as he presses two fingers to your entrance. You jolt in surprise when he starts to push into you, not stopping until he’s buried knuckle-deep in your core.

“God, you’re so tight,” He groans in awe, his fingers curling experimentally and staying curled when you cry out in pleasure. “Pretty pussy’s sucking my fingers in,” Haechan looks up at you with a smug grin, marveling at your glazed over eyes and parted lips as your breath comes out in shaky bursts.

“Haechan,” You whine, and he coos in fake sympathy, pulling his mouth away from your core to kiss, lick, and suck at the supple flesh of your inner thighs. 

“What is it, baby?” He taunts, and you whimper plaintively, bucking your hips up reflexively as you search for more stimulation. “Hm? Use your words.” Your face burns with humiliation as he talks down to you so plainly, but you swallow your pride enough not to protest. “Tell me what you want.”

“I want your mouth,” You murmur breathlessly, and he raises an eyebrow, dragging his tongue up your inner thigh just by your core as if proving a point.

“You have my mouth,” He points out, and you groan, half on the brink of throwing some sort of half-naked temper tantrum. 

“Not there,” You complain, and he turns his ear towards you as if to hear you better. “Haechan, please–” You beg, and he chuckles, his obvious amusement eviscerating the last of your patience, causing you to huff in aggravation and slide your fingers into his hair, curling until your fistful is tugging his hair none too gently, and he lets out a sinful groan of pain and pleasure, suddenly compliant as you pull him closer to your core. He drapes both of your legs over his shoulders and resumes eating you out with a fervor, fingers pumping in and out of you skillfully as he flicks your clit with his tongue in up-down motions. “Fuck, yes, just like that.” You encourage him, and he groans under his breath in ecstasy, pulling you closer until you’re almost falling off the hood.

“I got you,” He assures you, the words sending vibrations through your body as he refuses to move away from your core to speak, instead mumbling around your clit. “Taste so fucking good,” He mumbles, more to himself than anything else, and your head tips back in ecstasy as he delivers wet lash after lash of his tongue to your now hypersensitive bundle of nerves. 

When your breathing grows even more erratic and hitches, he flicks his gaze up to you, eyes probing and curious and something shifts behind his gaze as he realizes just how close you are. 

“You gonna come for me?” He asks, excitement and wonder creeping into his tone, and you don’t even have it in you to agree verbally, instead nodding your head emphatically as you lean back onto your forearms and let the pleasure slowly take over your senses.

His fingers curl forward and press against the fleshy bundle of nerves along your inner walls that has a sudden cry escaping you, Haechan focusing his attentions there and on your clit until you’re climaxing with a shudder of his name, legs pulling him closer to you as you ride out your high.

“That’s it, pretty, come undone for me.” He groans in delight as you gasp and whimper his name in ecstasy. When the sensations become too much, you sit up hurriedly, pushing at his shoulders to get him away from you and, thankfully, he obliges. He rocks back onto his soles as you catch your breath and stands up, chuckling when you yank him towards you by his belt, hands fumbling with the buckle clumsily in your eagerness as he watches you, amused.

“Haechan, take it off before I lose my patience,” You finally get his belt unbuckled and release him with a frustrated shove, glowering at the front of his pants with your arms crossed. Haechan snickers loudly at your state and tilts your head up by your chin, capturing your lips with his in a slow, passionate kiss. The taste of your arousal along with something very specifically Haechan has your head spinning, a wanton moan slipping from you and disappearing onto his tongue.

“Wanna know what I was thinking about earlier?” He murmurs into the kiss, and you nod, a gasp escaping you when you feel the head of his cock pressing up against your entrance. He slowly guides the head of his cock up and down your slit, groaning under his breath as your arousal coats his length. “Was thinking about how pretty I bet you’d look and sound when you cum.” Haechan grunts, and your breath catches as desire builds up in your throat.

“Yeah?” You ask breathlessly, the sound whiny as his cock nudges the underside of your clit and you hiss loudly in pleasure. 

“Yeah,” He confirms with a sweet, slightly condescending lilt, “and, baby, you’re even better than anything I could ever dream up.” He purrs, and you cry out weakly as he pushes into you slightly, the thick head of his length just making it past your entrance. “Your cute little faces and your noises, God, fuck—”

“Haechan,” You manage to get out, and he looks up from between your legs to lock eyes with you, his gaze heavy-lidded with desire and eyes blazing with intensity. “Please fuck me,” You whine, and he hisses in surprise, eyes widening slightly before he nods urgently, bracing one hand on the hood of the car beside you.

“Anything for my girl,” He says distractedly before shooting you a grin and wink almost as a reflex. He pushes into you slowly, his groan mixing with your shudder in the cool night air and the feeling of being so perfectly full as he bottoms out has your eyelids fluttering shut. “Wanna see those pretty eyes while I fuck you, angel.” He says in a low murmur, and you reopen your eyes with difficulty to meet eyes with Haechan, whose gaze is blazing with so much intensity that you feel heat rising to your face.

He pulls out of you and pushes back in slowly, as if assessing how ready you are, and when you lock your legs around him tighter, he lets out a breathless chuckle, looking from your face to where you two are joined together and back to your face before pulling back out and snapping his hips forward, bottoming out so suddenly that it pulls an involuntary whine of pleasure from you.

“Shit, you’re so tight, baby.” Haechan hisses in surprise, biting down on his bottom lip as he thrusts in and out of you. “Can barely pull out, you keep tightening around my cock like that.”

“Haechan, stop teasing me,” You complain, and he laughs, cupping the back of your neck and pulling you in for a kiss.

“You get so cute when I tease you, though.” He purrs into the kiss and, before you can say anything in response, snaps his hips into yours so forcefully that it sends you sliding up the hood of the car slightly, his jacket thankfully still protecting your legs from the cold metal. You cry out in surprise, and he grins, his fingers snaking up your neck from the base to curl in the hair at the nape, his hand tugging until your head is tipped back, exposing your neck to him. He takes the opportunity immediately, lips attaching to your neck as he sucks, licks, and kisses your skin, teeth occasionally sinking into your flesh and only retracting when a whine escapes you, his lips returning to press apologetic kisses to the indentation marks from his teeth. 

“Hae—chan,” You gasp out as he fucks into you, and his responding chuckle is so sinister that it sends a rush of excitement through you, almost evoking another moan.

“You like that, yeah? You keep letting out those pretty moans and we’re not gonna be alone for much longer.” He reminds you, and you keen softly as you try to keep in your sounds of pleasure. “Unless you want us to get caught.” He says slowly, and you look at him with wide eyes, shaking your head vigorously. “You sure?” He teases, speech abrupt from his thrusting.

“Please,” You whimper, and he pulls your hair until your head is tipped back as far as it can comfortably go, latching his lips onto the pulse point on the side of your neck and sucking a bruise into the skin there.

“Pretty girl wants someone to come out of their house and see how good she can take it on the hood of my car?” He’s delighted by how frustrated you’re getting, every whine, huff, and groan you let out met with his own coos of feigned sympathy as he watches you with bright eyes. 

“Haechan, I’m close—” You moan out.

“I know, baby, I know.” He shushes you soothingly, and his hand moves from your hip to slip between your legs to play with your clit, fingers persistent and moving to follow you even as you gasp and jolt away from him. “Don’t run from it, just be good, angel.” Haechan’s coaxing isn’t helping your attempts to stay calm at all, the pleasure building even more rapidly now, and it’s not long before you’re climaxing around him with a cry of his name, your body stiffening before it goes limp for a moment, rendering you a rag doll that Haechan continues to drive his hips into in search of his own climax. When your hips reflexively jerk away from his fingers on your clit and you’re letting out sharp breaths and whines, Haechan pins you in place with his hips, angling himself so he’s fucking down into you, his cock reaching places you’d barely become acquainted with. “What did I say? Don’t run from it,” He pants, and you sniffle as tears well up in your eyes from the overwhelming sensations.

“Haechan,” You plead desperately, nails digging into his arm slightly, and he groans in ecstasy, locking eyes with you.

“Aw, don’t cry, pretty girl.” He coos sweetly, and you think for a moment that he’s going to give you a break, but he just presses his fingers against you harder and moves them even more determinedly. “Actually? Go ahead and cry for me, baby. It’ll make me finish faster.” He taunts, and you let out a pathetic little wail as your poor clit is subjected to intense overstimulation, a few tears actually spilling over your bottom lashes and down your cheeks. “Almost there, baby. You’re gonna give me one more, okay?”

“I can’t–” You start.

“I wasn’t asking.” The finality in his tone makes your eyes roll back into your head with pleasure, everything becoming too much as he guides you through a jerky, powerful climax that has you tensing your abdomen so hard that you fear it’ll cramp. “That’s it, fuck,” He hisses, his head falling forward to rest his forehead against yours as his thrusts come to a gradual stop, Haechan bottoming out in you entirely as he releases into you. His eyes screwed shut and his jaw dropped, he looks unrealistically attractive like this, and your admiration is short-lived as his eyes slowly reopen and focus on your lips. He leans forward to catch your lips with his and kisses you so smoothly, it feels like you’ve been doing this for years, with his tongue gliding against yours at just the right moments, teeth tugging at your bottom lip just hard enough to make you whimper, and his hands stroking your sides, caressing your curves as he re-acquaints himself with the taste of you. 

You’re not sure how long you two just remain there kissing, but after some time, Haechan breaks the kiss and rests his forehead against yours.

“You have,” He says breathlessly, chest heaving, “no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

“I bet I have a pretty good guess.” You reply with a wry smile, and Haechan grins, squeezing your hips gently.

“What if we get all cleaned up, hm? My car has heating.” He murmurs, and you freeze.

“Your c—Haechan, we could have done that in the comfort of your car? Your warm car?” You splutter, and he grins sheepishly.

“Sorry, angel. Just thought it’d be hot on the hood.” He admits, and you roll your eyes, not yet wanting to admit he has a point.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah—get me into the warmth.” You huff.

“There’s something so healing about smoking after midnight.” Haechan muses, his fingers trailing over your thighs lightly, reverently, even. His backseat is surprisingly comfortable, but you’re willing to bet that being curled up against his chest is playing a large factor. 

“Mm, yeah,” You hum thoughtfully, nodding. “It’s like a reset.” 

“Exactly,” Haechan says, nodding. “You get me, angel.” He looks down at where you’re resting your head against him and smiles fondly, gesturing at the joint he revived from earlier between his fingers questioningly. “You want some?”

“Mm…yeah.” You decide, and the corner of his mouth quirks up into a crooked grin before he takes a long drag of the joint, closing his eyes as he holds it in for several beats. He tucks a finger under your chin and tilts your head up to his, eyes only opening to shoot you a wink before his lips are on yours and he exhales the remainder of the smoke into your mouth. 

White smoke billows out from your mouths as you shift to get more comfortable and kiss him deeper, and he chuckles, flicking at your bottom lip with his tongue. When you two part, your lids are heavier than before, either from the weed in your system or from the arousal buzzing through your body, and Haechan leans in again, pecking the little pucker left behind on your lips from his kiss.

“You’re so cute,” He groans, tossing his head back dramatically. “What am I going to do with you?”

“You could always kiss me again.” You suggest, and when he grins widely at you, you smile innocently, yelping and laughing in surprise when he shifts to move on top of you and hover just above your face, the joint now lying forgotten in the makeshift ashtray Haechan pulled out of his glove compartment and set between the two front seats. You two stare each other down for what feels like ages, your gaze occasionally drifting to his lips, and—

“You and that lip,” He growls, leaning down and kissing you again. He rolls his hips down against yours as your lips move against each other’s, and you can’t help but giggle mischievously, provoking Haechan to pull back and scrutinize your expression. “…You were doing that on purpose!”

“What, the lip biting?” You ask curiously, and Haechan just stares at you, his accusatory expression unwavering. “Yeah, that was partially on purpose the last couple of times.” You smile devilishly, and he huffs indignantly.

“Why are you like this?” He groans, unable to hide his laughter, and you shrug, feigning innocence once more.

“I thought if I made you kinda mad, you’d fuck me harder.” You admit with a little smile, and his brows practically shoot up into his hairline as he regards you incredulously.

“You are such a little minx,” Haechan grunts before pressing his lips to yours again, and you can’t seem to stop giggling into the kiss, your smile too wide to kiss him properly. “Do you have any idea,” He mumbles into the kiss, “just how good you’re gonna get it later?”

“No…” You drag out the syllable as you look up at him curiously. “Maybe you should give me a sneak peek.” You suggest, and he nods.

“Maybe I should,” He agrees, and excitement flares up in your chest like a firework. “First, though, do you wanna get out of here?”

“The car?” You ask, confused, and he snorts, shaking his head slowly.

“This area,” Haechan clarifies.

“And go where?” You follow up with another question, and he pauses to think.

“On a scale of one to ten, how do you feel about tacos right now?” He asks, and your eyes widen as you nod vigorously.

“Oh, fuck yeah.” You agree eagerly. Haechan laughs at your excited state and nods in understanding, moving from on top of you and shifting to let you sit up.

“We can get tacos,” He starts, “and we can go back to my place…if you want.”

“Sure thing,” You say with an eager smile, and Haechan kisses your lips, your cheek, then trails kisses down to the back of your hand, looking up at you with warm brown eyes.

“Great,” He answers, relieved, and as you climb to the passenger seat, he slides a hand up the back of your thigh and pinches your ass, a cheeky, self-satisfied grin on his face when you whirl around to look at him. “Not sorry,” He shrugs carelessly, and you scoff, barely hiding your smile in time as you face forward.

Haechan takes the easier route, getting out of the car and re-entering into the driver’s seat, and he turns to look at you, wiggling his brows playfully. 

“Wanna know what I’m thinking about?” He asks.

“Sure,” You answer, and he starts the car, carefully pulling out of his parking spot and driving down the street. 

“I’m thinking about how you told me you bit your lip on purpose so I’d fuck you harder.” He chuckles in disbelief.

“You weren’t even that mean to me because of it,” You point out, pouting slightly, and he arches a brow without looking away from the road, the sight almost unbearably attractive. 

“What if I like you too much to be mean to you?” He counters, and you huff, shifting in your seat so you’re angled towards him.

“Well, like me just a little less so you can do a little more mean stuff next time.” Haechan laughs at your half-advice, half-plea for him, and you whine, barely restraining the urge to stomp your foot. “I mean it!”

“Liking you less won’t happen, angel.” He assures you, continuing before you can speak. “I can make the mean thing work, though.” 

“That’s all I ask.” You say, raising your hands defensively, and his hand closest to you leaves the steering wheel as he links his fingers with yours, Haechan now driving one-handed down the road.

“Anything for my girl.”

thank you for reading!! if you liked this fic, please consider tipping!!

VENMO !! CASHAPP !! KO-FI !! WISHLIST !! (why?)

pussy fiend, part 2 (l.dh)

PAIRING ➢ haechan x fem!reader

GENRES & AUS ➢ smut, humor, fluff; college au, enemies to fuckbuddies to lovers, roommate au

WORD COUNT ➢ 68.9k total, in 2 parts (28.2k & 40.7k)

WARNINGS ➢ invasion of privacy, Haechan’s a sneaky little shit, cocky!Haechan, jokes about emotional manipulation, author pretends to know about stuff she doesn’t, mild dubcon

CONTENTS ➢ (mild) dubcon, bratty switches! boffum!, somnophilia, oral (receiving), allusions to a free-use kink but barely, rimming (receiving), creampie, dacryphilia, brief thigh job, praise, barely degradation but if you’re sensitive note that, some spit kink, panty sucking (?), Haechan’s a bit of a pain slut, fingering, biting

SUMMARY ➢ part two baybee!! uhhh he still likes you and is still a fiend for pussy bestie have fun :)

AUTHOR’S NOTE ➢ thank you so much for all the love on part one!! please do not get upset with me if you ignore the contents/warnings and get your feelings hurt; that is no one’s doing but yours.massive thank you to my love @ncteez for all her help with the initial idea and beta reading this monster for me :’)

PART ONE FOUND HERE !!

PSST—HEY, BESTIE!

As you’ve probably heard by now, Haechan—who is fucking bonkers—stole my sex toys and I’m pretty sure he’s not giving them back any time soon.

From one person with needs to another; if you can, please toss a couple bucks my way so I can replace the ones Haechan so cruelly and derangedly stole from me—I’m so pent up that I almost bit someone today. It’s bad.

If you can spare at least $1, maybe even $3 or as much as you can, it’d mean the world to me; he can’t seriously expect me to come and find him every time I want to get off, right?

Anyway, thanks for listening to my tale of woe, bestie. :( Thanks in advance for your help!

With love,

a very sexually frustrated (and broke) MC

Keep reading

between the sheets » ldh

genre | smut (mdni!!), haechan x reader

word count | 2.2k

summary | you find yourself chased out of your apartment in the dead of night, and desperately seeking a place to sleep, you somehow wind up at haechan’s door

warnings | smut, afab!reader and female pronouns, fingering + handjob, basically the “only one bed” trope, tiny mention of alcohol but no drinking

the time reads 2:47 am.

there’s not a single person, or even evidence of one, in sight. the empty expanse of the hall is left in cold silence, besides the torrent of the rain and hail against the window panes. the stale air feels as though it chills you down to the bone. you squeeze your eyes shut, as the burning glow of the fluorescent lights makes them sting, and you bury your face in the blanket you have draped around you like a cape.

you heave a heavy sigh, banging your fist against the door in front of you again, louder this time. you know haechan isn’t a light sleeper, but he lives in your apartment complex and it’s the only place you could think to go at this time of night in this severe of a storm. you’d called him a few times, but with no answer to any of them you assumed he slept through each ring.

you begin to become frustrated, lowering yourself to plop down and sit criss-cross on the dingy carpet. a strike of lightening cracks through the eerie darkness outside the window, a deep boom of thunder following soon after. contemplating your next move, you rest your head in your palms. the fatigue starts crawling to your head; the strange calm of the harsh rain could lull you to sleep right here if you let it.

you decide to try calling haechan one more time. “hyuckie” displays on the screen as you rest your phone on your knee, growing more hopeless with each second it continues to ring. even if it means you have to camp out in the hallway, there’s no way you’re going back to your apartment.

finally the phone stops ringing, and you hear rustling on the other end of the line. you perk up, grabbing the phone off of your leg to lift it to your ear.

“whaaaat?” haechan answers, audibly tired.

“hey, um,” you start timidly. “can you let me in? i’m outside.”

you weren’t sure what you had expected his response to be, and really, there wasn’t one. he just ends the call, and for a fleeting second your heart drops.

until you hear muffled noises deep within his apartment. you glance up at the door and lean in to listen a little closer.

shuffling. haechan’s sleepy grumbling. a faint thump. “oww!” he whines, and you assume he’s stubbed his toe on his coffee table. you breathe a sigh of relief as you hear him coming closer.

the door swings open, revealing a very exhausted looking haechan. your eyes trail up his fleece pajama pants and white tshirt to his face. he squints against the bright light, looking down at you through one eye as he rubs the other with the side of his hand. you give him a sheepish smile from the floor, watching him balance himself against the doorway. you wonder what he could possibly be thinking upon seeing you, sitting desperately at his doorstep, wearing nothing but a thin top and shorts, and a throw blanket veiled over your hunched shoulders.

“what are you doing?” he grumbles softly, sifting his fingers through his sloppy hair. thunder rumbles through the sky again, vibrating the walls around you.

you bring yourself up from the floor, pulling your small blanket tighter around yourself. “i’m sorry, can i- is it okay if i- if i sleep here?” you ask with a small hesitant voice, suddenly realizing that you really didn't have a plan for what to say if he opened the door.

haechan’s brow furrows. the wheels almost visibly struggle to turn in his drowsy head. a moment of harsh quiet hangs in the air between you.

“please?” you finally speak, more hushed this time.

his gaze on you softens just a bit after hearing your plea. you aren’t quite sure why it changed so suddenly; maybe the desperation was on your face, or maybe he picked up on how your voice was an inch from breaking.

“yeah, uh- yeah of course,” he answers, and he steps back from the doorway to allow you inside. you give him a small smile and breathe a relieved “thank you” as you slip past him.

dull, cloudy moonlight filters through the large windows, replacing the buzzing white light from the hall as haechan closes the door behind him. you allow your eyes to adjust to the new darkness, maneuvering your way around the furniture to sit yourself on his couch. he turns and walks the other way with a quiet hum, making his way to his kitchen.

as you situate yourself on the cushions, you feel uneasy. you were no stranger to haechan or his apartment- you weren’t even a stranger to sleeping on this very couch, but that had always been accompanied by having just a bit too much liquor in your blood and a few more wasted friends littered across the floor.

you'd never seen his apartment so…still.

you try your best to snuggle comfortably into your small blanket, folding your legs up beside you and leaning to lay your head on the arm rest. as you do, haechan emerges from around the corner and makes a lazy trail back to his bedroom with a bottle of water swinging in his hand.

but he stops and turns around, his eyes landing on you, curled up in the corner of his couch.

“what are you doing?” he questions a second time.

“what do you mean?”

silence lingers once more. he cracks his bottle open, taking a few thick gulps. he leans back against the wall as he screws the cap back on.

“why are you on the couch? get up, come on.”

confusion wracks your brain. haechan casually approaches you and holds out his hand. as you stare at it for a moment, dumbfounded, you finally understand what he means.

“no- no its okay, i don’t want to be any more of a burden-“

haechan says your name, simple and soft, and you stop short.

“it’s freezing, i’m not letting you sleep on the couch. come on.”

something feels different.

you look up at him, standing over you. this is haechan- the look, the voice, everything. the very same haechan you’ve known all these years. lee donghyuck, who you’ve adored since you first met him. he’s loud and sarcastic and at times even a bit full of himself.

but in this moment, he’s… gentle. you melt under his gaze.

you raise your hand to take his, and he leads you to his room without another word.

stepping into haechan’s bedroom is like taking a leap of faith. its unknown to you, like unexplored waters. its cozier than you assumed it would be. a homey sort of smell wafts into you as he guides you toward the bed, and a mellow light glows from a small lamp on his bedside table. the blankets and pillows look comfortable and plush, still in disarray from slumber.

the bed looks incredibly inviting; you stare at the covers, twisting the hem of your shirt between your fingers. haechan clicks the lamp off and settles between the sheets on the opposite side like he never left.

you give him an apprehensive look in the dim moonlight. he reaches up to grab your wrist, pausing to glance up at you as if to ask permission, and you let him pull you down onto the mattress. haechan tugs the blankets up and around you in one swift motion. a shudder spills down your spine as the cold sheet settles around your body.

in an attempt to get comfortable, you shuffle around a bit and roll over on your side. coming eye to eye with him, it dawns on you how close to him you actually are.

for the next few lofty minutes, everything feels rooted in time. from the window comes winds howling through the trees and pouring rain, and from your chest comes the relentless drumming of your heartbeat. haechan’s sleepy gaze is lazily fixed on you. the heat in your cheeks is so intense you hope he can't feel it on his own.

haechan is so nonchalant it feels like you’re in different worlds. your eyes flicker across his silhouette; he’s so incredibly handsome up close you nearly swoon. you swear there’s electricity buzzing across the short space between you.

“you’re really pretty when you’re nervous.”

your mind stutters. “i’m not nervous!” you blurt out.

“oh yeah? are you shivering because you’re cold, then?”

you hadn't realized you were still trembling. the beating of your heart in your throat makes it impossible to reply. haechan’s hand moves under the covers and gently snakes around you to rest on the small of your back, making your breath falter. before you even know it’s happened, he’s pulled you closer to him. your arm flies up to steady yourself before you crash into him from the force, and your hand lands on his chest. haechan’s warmth envelopes you, and it's borderline intoxicating.

“better?”

for a long moment, you stare at each other, breathing the same air, hearts beating in tandem.

“is this real?” the words had come out before you could stop them.

a smirk appears on haechan’s lips. “i hope so,” he breathes.

his fingers trace up your spine, leaving goosebumps on your skin in their wake. when his hand tenderly cups your cheek your breathing becomes heavy and labored, stomach fluttering. you subconsciously lean into his touch as his thumb strokes the apple of your cheek. you see his eyes break away from yours and land on your parted lips.

“can i kiss you?”

the most subtle of nods is all you can muster.

his mouth meets yours, simple and sweet, just briefly before he pulls away. even such a small moment felt like a dream.

you then slide your hand up his chest, you eyes never leaving his. you lean into him again. hot breath falling on his damp lips, your nose gingerly brushing against his. you lace your fingers in his thick locks, delicately scratching at his scalp.

his eyes leave yours as they flutter closed. he lets out the most docile whine- so small you almost missed it- and you cave.

you bring him in and attach your lips once again. this one is messier; your nerves dissolve as the only sense whirling through your entire being is the desire you feel. haechan lets out a low groan into your mouth, fingers slipping delicately across the skin of your hip, then sliding down to grip the back of your thigh and drag your leg up and over his waist. you moan into the heated kiss, suddenly feeling how wet you are as your legs separate from each other.

as one hand continues to tug his hair, the other drifts up to find purchase on his shoulder, knuckles turning white as you dig your fingers in and pull your chest into his. you rock your hips on his thigh situated between your legs. haechan lets out a trembling breath as you brush against the erection behind his fleece pajama pants.

haechan’s fingers inch up the inside of your thigh, stopping just slightly above the bottom of your shorts and skating ever so softly across the hem of your underwear. your body temperature raises with excitement.

he pulls his lips away from yours, breathing strained.

“is this okay?” he asks.

“yes,” you sigh.

pushing the fabric out of the way, haechan’s fingers brush against the sensitive area, and you let out a pathetic whimper at the slimmest about of contact. slow circles begin to trace around your clit, and you bite your lip as your head tilts back.

haechan’s hot mouth meets the spot on your neck just below your ear, leaving sloppy kisses across the sweaty skin. his fingers quicken against your pussy, dipping in and out of your soaked entrance.

“god,” haechan grumbles against your skin. “you have no idea how long i've wanted this to happen, pretty girl.” his sudden pet name for you makes you sink in his arms.

“i do,” you huff. “believe me, i do”

you trail a hand down to dip below the waistband of his pants. he chokes out a surprised groan when your silky fingers brush along the head of his hardened cock. you sink further to grip the base, stroking him up and down at an agonizing pace. he growls into your neck, sinking his teeth into your pulse.

as you work each other in sync, you grab his jaw and pull him up into a clumsy kiss. you swallow each others lewd sounds, striving to bring each other crashing into your release.

the tension building inside you threatens to spill over. “close- hah, close,” you mewl. he picks up the pace, his hand shaking, and not long after, you’re barreling headfirst into a blinding orgasm. you bury your face into haechan’s neck and cry out, your wet lips drooling on his shirt.

you keep up the momentum you've set, pumping haechan’s cock, and lift up your head to watch him cum as heavy breaths wrack your lungs. his chest rumbles with a low growl as he twitches in your hand and warm cum spills through your fingers. his brows draw together above his closed eyes, his jaw clenched so tight you fear his teeth might break.

vision fuzzy, lightheaded, you both take a few moments to regain your senses. you look up at him through your lashes, humid breaths spilling through the lazy grin on your lips.

“wow,” he huffs, admiring your post-cum glow, his eye lids heavy. “you should sleep over more often.”

“oh? why? so we can continue this where we left off?” you tease, your thumb brushing against his lower lip as he smiles. he leans down to meet you in another slow, sultry kiss, your dewey lips moving together in a perfectly languid flow.

“no, not just that,” he responds upon pulling away. “but that would be nice.” he winks.

hyuckle ! brat bottom chenle, brat tamer top donghyuck

preview

“Apologize.” “I just did.” Donghyuck took Chenle’s hands off of his body. “No, baby, are you stupid? Get on your knees and beg for it.”