Fight Aphobia - Tumblr Posts
So, today’s Valentine’s Day, and I asked myself, what do I want my fellow aromantic kids to know?
I want them to know that there’s nothing wrong with who they are. They’ve been told that there’s only one way to love, but that’s a lie. So they don’t fit inside a box, a box of flowers and pink hearts and stuffed teddy bears? So what? They’ve got broader feelings in their hearts, feelings that don’t have to be limited, or cookie-cutter perfect, or as recognizable as holding hands. I want them to know that you don’t need to date someone to show them you care. You don’t need to date anyone, in fact: you can just love everyone equally, and that’s OK. We’re told that we need someone to be complete, but here’s a secret: we don’t need other people. We want people, maybe, but we don’t need them. Not in that way.
I want them to know that their color is green. On the color wheel, green is the opposite of red; red is the color of romance, and we are aromantic.
I want them to know that they aren’t ‘missing out.’ All forms of love are beautiful, vibrant, exquisite, and kind. They’re kind.
I’m writing from the heart, guys, from this small green heart that didn’t feel whole until I realized there was nothing wrong with me. There’s nothing wrong with me. I’m just a kid who wants to be me, to be free and love freely. Freely, in colors that aren’t just pink and red and ‘we’re an item’ colored. I want all of you to feel that same love; just shout it from the rooftops. You’re valid. You’re beautiful. I know it’s complicated, I know it’s not all clean edges and perfect form. But we’re gonna be okay. I just know it. We’re gonna be okay.
Green hearts, everybody. Peace.
Prompt 1 February 17&18: Discovery
I started questioning my sexuality two and half years ago, and for a while I was experimenting with different labels and words to describe myself. Figuring out I was asexual was pretty easy, but my romantic orientation continued to confuse me - sometimes it still does. I knew for certain I fell on the aromantic spectrum when a close friend of mine developed a crush on me, and we started to ‘date’. It became pretty clear to me that there was a problem, and it wasn’t my friend. Two weeks into our relationship, I had to break it off, and I explained all my feelings and discomforts to my friend. Ever since then, I’ve been exploring my aromantic-ness and finding new ways to describe and express it.
I don’t ever want to date someone, or even kiss them - like a real kiss. I don’t know how I know this for certain, but I do. I never want to say about my relationship with someone “we’re an item. don’t touch us.” Staying single is what works for me. I’m a really affectionate, emotionally open person, but I’ve learned that it’s hard for me to show love for someone without leading them on. I’ve been aware of people developing feelings for me that they think I might reciprocate, but I don’t. It has hurt some friendships and my own way of expressing myself. But I’m just gonna focus on being me, and loving people exactly the way I want to.