Glock Function - Tumblr Posts
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
You. I fear you.
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
#DOUG #HEY DOUG YOUVE MADE IT BIG
YEAH I SURE HAVE HUH
it's overwhelming but there is honestly something kinda nice about knowing that nearly twelve thousand people (and counting) think I'm funny
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
YOOOOOOOOOO
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
Hi, OP here.
What the hell do you mean by this
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
How often do you dream about Tumblr?
Almost never, in fact. At least, as far as I remember, since most of my dreams just evaporate within an hour of waking. My dreams are incredibly bizarre and vivid, and usually make no sense in the light of day, but this one was a rare gem that not only cohered but was extremely funny
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
OP here. Yes, very salient points, thank you cyle! Absolutely didn't intend for the post to read as minimizing or making light of the very real problems we have here, but then again I didn't anticipate this would make it outside the small circle of people who know me and understand my intentions. (ngl after this started really getting around I was anxious about exactly that for days.) It was a clever pun cooked up by my subconscious, that's all.
Obviously I don't expect this to be legitimately implemented, even as an April Fool's one-off. There are numerous practical problems standing in the way. But someone in the notes suggested tribbles as an alternative, and I LOVE that, so y'know... maybe getting whacked by that particular Apollonian dodgeball wouldn't be so bad.
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
#MAKE THIS BLOW UP
buddy it already has 160k notes and it's barely slowed down in two weeks. that ship has fucking sailed
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing
the fucking glock function is still getting at least a dozen notes every day
so i've been on this site for a hot minute and i've always operated on the idea that if you're here long enough you'll end up with at least one popular text post but uh, maybe that's not true? so, i wanna know
oh god I forgot. happy one year anniversary to the post that broke my blog
had a fucking hilarious dream that tumblr replaced the "block" function with the far funnier "glock" function, which did the exact same thing except whenever anyone blocked you a random bullet hole, like a png of a bullet hole, would appear on your blog. discourse blogs were unreadable bc you'd go to the page and the sheer amount of bullet hole pngs stacked over the blogs obscured everything. I woke myself up laughing