I'm Wheezing With Laughter - Tumblr Posts
“You’re not my Dad!”
Hahahahaha
Russian exorcisms be like
tfw you’re suddenly the party healer
I PUT THE HOUSECAT OUTSIDE FOR TWO GODDAMN MINUTES AS A JOKE AND HE COMES RUNNING IN WITH A SNAKE IN HIS MOUTH
THIS IS THE HARDEST I HAVE LAUGHED IN SO LONG YOU HAVE CURED MY DEPRESSION
me: i love you but please, please do not step on my keyboard. go a foot out of your way and go around
my lovable yet ungrateful cat, a troublegirl and a fiend: you could sooner divert a river from its course than deny my nature
Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*
My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.
pick your fighter
the ‘$1000 to go to Hawaii’ bride, the ‘I bought a $99 polygraph on amazon’ lady, or the ‘why was $200 so huge’ birthday girl
The Onion’s review of Mamma Mia 2 is the only one I need
the best trope in media is: “characters turn on the lights, see the monster, and immediately turn the lights back off”
