Jake Duskwood - Tumblr Posts - Page 4

you drew stars around my scars.

this line giving a mc and jake vibe for me

work of art

😩

Quotes that match duskwood characters

i see this trend on tik tok a lot so lets do it here. its just my opinion, let me know if you agree! :) i can do part 2 if anyone would be interested!

Jake&MC

Thomas&Hannah

Richy&Jessy&MC

Jake&MC

Jake about MC

Richy&Jessy

Lilly&Jake

Jake&MC

Amy Bell Lewis

Hannah&Jake

MC&Jake

Jessy&Richy

Jake&MC

Jake

MC&Jake

MC

MC&Jessy

Hannah

Jake

MC&Richy

Jennifer Hanson

Quotes that match duskwood characters part 2 (mostly jake and mc)

Jake&MC

MC about Jake while conversation with Dan

Whole group

Hannah

Jake&MC

Jake&MC

Jake&MC (we are a baddie🤭)

Jessy&Richy

Jake

Lilly&Jake Jake&MC

Jessy&Dan

Hannah

MC&Jake

Jake Hannah Richy

Jessy&MC

Jake&MC

Jake&MC

Jake&MC

Jake&MC

MC&Jake

Jessy&Richy

i will be writing a new one shot about jake, and i have a question: do you prefer when the character's name is MC or the author gives her a name?

jake are you on drugs

I MEAN-

if we not get words like this in new game i swear to you

he is so ✨UNTOUCHABLE✨

Dark paradise

Short story about Jake's life after Hannah was found.

warnings: Jake's POV, mention of sex, slightly different version of Jake that you rarely see here

*3 years after finding Hannah*

Tired, I opened the door and a pleasant smell entered my nostrils. Home. It smelled like home. That was a pleasant mix of the smell of dinner being cooked, the warmth, and the plants she cared so much for. Exactly, she was the reason that I could call this apartment home. Her perfume, scent and presence weresomething to call these four empty walls home.

With a sigh, I hung my coat on the rack and headed towards the kitchen, where I could hear the faint clinking of pots. I stood in the doorway, leaning my shoulder against the doorframe and crossing my arms over my chest. I watched with delight as my fiancée stood with her back to me, stirred something in the pot and at the same time rocked to the song that was played from the loudspeaker. The corner of my mouth went up as I recognized it as "Hips don't lie" by Shakira. MC was wearing my gray sweatpants and a black T-shirt with the word GHOSTBUSTER engraved on the back that I had given her for Christmas. I had an identical one. She wiggled her hips and sang one of her favorite songs, oblivious to my presence. She was too focused on cooking and dancing to hear me open the door. I loved seeing her like this. When she didn't care about anything at all, when she was completely happy and devoted. I loved the way she moved her body because damn. She did it damn well.

And that really made me want to learn to speak Spanish.

Finally, the young woman turned to reach for the plate on the table. When her eyes landed on me, she jumped up and screamed softly. My smile only grew bigger, so I moved towards her to place the sweet kiss on her lips that I had been craving all morning. MC turned around and turned off the speaker, then turned back to me. She placed a hand on her chest, trying to control her breathing.

– Christ, Jake. Don't scare me like that unless you want me to have a heart attack before we get married. – she said and I leaned in to kiss her. Her lips tasted the same. They were sweet and addictive. Her hair was shiny and soft. They smelled like the shampoo she'd used for as long as I could remember. Her skin was smooth and so silky that I wanted to melt into it forever. Her beautiful eyes were filled with love and tenderness. She was my mainstay of safety.

– Never. First you will be my wife, and then I will scare you every day as long as you wait for me here. – I murmured into her mouth which made her giggle

– Two more months, Mr. Donfort, and then we'll be married. – she replied and kissed me. Hot and passionately.

I pushed her to sit on the counter. She immediately wrapped her legs around my waist and I started hungrily devour her neck. Oh my god how much I adored her. I loved her whole, more and more every day if that was even possible. Moans came out of her mouth and I felt my own erection. Soon she grabbed my hair and pulled hard to tear me away from her skin, which made me look at her a bit hazy.

– First dinner, then dessert. – she said, smiling slyly. – I can't wait for you to tell me about your day at work.

That was our daily routine. I came home from work and she was waiting for me. We talked about our days, listening to each other with delight. It felt like a dream.

– Living with you is a dream I never want to wake up from.

She leaned down to my lips an..

I woke up abruptly.

I looked half-consciously around the room I was in. It was dark. The only light that illuminated it came from the computer in front of me. I groaned softly as I realized how hurt I was. I must have fallen asleep in the chair at the laptop where I was working to confuse my pursuers.I froze, breathing quickly and shallowly as fragments of my dream began to reach me. I clenched my jaw and fists, remembering literally everything. Damn it! It was so good already. It was getting better, I didn't think about her as much as before. The last dream or daydream about her was three days ago.

For the past three days, I've been free from memories of her.

And now it's all started all over again. My loneliness made itself felt again. I felt like I was dead, I believed I was in purgatory, and my punishment was her. MC. The girl who's been stalking me almost every night and day for the last five fucking years.

As I stood in front of the mirror in a dingy motel bathroom across the globe from her, I felt self-hatred and disgusted. I was so weak. Five years ago I wrote to her that I was at her mercy. After all these years, nothing has changed. She still had me and I hated it so much. After what happened in the mine, I never wrote to her again. Throughout the search for Hannah, I knew this moment would come. I knew that eventually I would have to break her heart, break her whole, but I kept pushing our relationship further and further. It was incredible nice feeling, after all these years, to feel that someone cares about you. I was totally addicted to it and couldn't stop it. At first I tried to fight this feeling, but eventually I gave up. I knew that I wasn't able to give her safety and I couldn't let her run away with me. I was the asshole who confessed his love to her and then left her without even saying goodbye.

I'm weak, I thought as my fist hit the mirror. The glass shattered into millions of pieces, hurting my hands, but even that pain was nothing compared to my still bleeding heart.

* * *

The next night the dreams came again. I woke up drenched afterwards. My hands and my whole body were shaking. I immediately drank half a bottle of water and then vomited all morning. It was worse than usual because I remembered that I hadn't eaten anything in over two days. It's been a long time since I felt such pain in my stomach, when all I was throwing out was bile and saliva. I spent over 2 hours lying on the cold tiles. I lost consciousness a few times and I think I had a fever. There was nothing I could do to help myself. Barely alive, after closing my eyes, over the toilet bowl, I saw her face in my mind. I started vomiting again. How romantic.

When I had recovered a bit, I swallowed a handful of pills I found in my backpack. Some of them were just painkillers and others were something I couldn't even name. I needed some drugs to be able to ensure my survival.

Quickly looking at how far away my pursuers were, I called Mercedes. The government was far enough away that I could afford a little pleasure while still in Colville. Mercedes was something of a prostitute with whom I had quite a long relation. Whenever I was around, I would meet her when I needed a... distraction.

The woman immediately agreed. I heard a knock on the door not even an hour later. Our clothes quickly ended up on the floor because girl didn't bother to talk. Neither do I. Sex with her was the same as always. No. Today was better, best of all the times I've had sex with Mercedes ever. I felt better because I was thinking of someone else when I was fucking her.

I was thinking about the fucking MC.

Mercedes smirked slightly as she put her skimpy clothes back on. She was smoking a cigarette while I tossed her money for her service. I was feeling fucking sick again, and I couldn't get the bile taste out of my throat.

Mercedes left, but this time she didn't say she loved my body like she always did. This time she gave me a mocking smirk so that next time I wouldn't call her MC, and today I reportedly did it six times.

I definetely needed more drugs. Or alcohol. Or their mixtures.

"Your soul is haunting me and telling me that everything is fine

But I wish I was dead

Every time I close my eyes, it's like a dark paradise

No one compares to you

I'm scared that you won't be waiting on the other side" — Lana Del Rey

im starting winter holidays and im gonna be a bit bored so please write a sentence, song title anything and i'll try to write a fanfiction for this

World where we don't collide

Short story about MC's therapy after 5 years since Hannah was found

words: 1600

warnings: probably none, maybe a bit mean MC

A shaky breath left my mouth as I opened the door that led to a place I hated with all my heart. But I still went there. Warmth enveloped my body, which was numb from being outside for so long. It was the end of November, and the weather this year was extremely hostile. I walked down the long corridor to see the secretary, who, as usual, was piled high with papers she was tiredly trying to sort through.

I coughed softly, gaining her attention. At first, clearly frightened, she looked up, and when she recognized me, her lips slightly stretched into a small smile.

– Hello, MC. I haven't seen you here in so long that I started to miss that beautiful face. – she said with obvious amusement, which made me lighten up a bit as well

– Yes, it's been a while since my last visit. I replied, playing with the sleeve of my black coat. – Is she free yet?

The woman nodded and went back to her papers. I sighed softly and headed towards the office that had been haunting me for months.

I knocked to make sure it was empty except for the doctor, and when I heard a soft 'come in', I went inside. The white walls matched the gold accessories nicely. Everything about it was exactly as I remembered, and I hadn't been there for the past two months. My gaze moved over every square millimeter of the room, consistently avoiding the silhouette of the therapist, who was sitting in one of the armchairs as usual.

– MC. Nice to see you. – she greeted, and I nodded to her, in the meantime taking off and hanging my coat on the hanger. – Please, take a sit.

I took the seat across from her, crossing my legs. I wanted to start a conversation, but I didn't know how.

– You stopped therapy. – she said, to which I nodded bitterly. – May I know what was the reason for that?I sighed, biting my lip nervously.

– I knew where our conversations were headed, and I didn't want to talk about it. I didn't want to talk about him. – I replied without looking into her eyes. I didn't like making eye contact with anyone. The eyes were windows to people's souls, which I always found very distracting.

– Then why did you come back?

– I got a letter. I do not know what to do with it. – I said as she gave me a questioning look. I finally looked up at her and handed her the paper I had in my hand. As she read it, I stared at her face, which so painfully reminded me of Lilly's face. She was a woman with short blonde hair and sea blue eyes. They could be soothing and calm like the sound of waves, or stormy and menacing like a storm in the middle of a deep ocean. She finally looked at me, and I saw just a hint of that anger in her eyes.

– Hannah and Thomas getting married? – she asked the obvious question, because the card I gave her was an invitation I got two days ago. - How do you feel with it?

I snorted a little mockingly, but my reaction didn't put her off at all.

– I don't feel much. It's none of my business anymore. – I looked at the vase of flowers on the table between us

– I can tell when you're lying, you know? Why did you come to me if you don't want to tell me the truth and let me help you? – she asked me a sharp question that made my jaw clench

– I think I feel angry. – I said, playing with my fingers – No. Anger is empty. Two days ago, when I first read that stupid invitation, I wanted to rip her into little pieces. Fury seized me, my whole body burned. I still wonder how could they? Next week is the fifth anniversary of finding Hannah, the fifth anniversary of Richy's death, and the fifth anniversary of his death.. – I blurted out, breathing shallowly, my nails digging into the palm of my hand – Jake's death. And suddenly they're going to throw a huge wedding party, enjoying themselves and having fun like nothing ever happened? And they have the audacity to invite me there after all they've done to me?

– Next week is the fifth anniversary of the mine events. Don't torture your thoughts. Pour them out, don't fight them. – she said in a quiet and calm voice, completely ignoring my outburst of anger at Hannah

I closed my eyes heavily, letting out a breath full of frustration, fatigue and reluctance. We've been rolling this topic over and over again for eight months. I was tired of analyzing and wondering if I could have done something to change the course of events. If I had gone to meet the Man Without The Face, would everything have turned out completely differently?

– I feel the same as two, three or four years ago. I feel betrayed by Richy, yet his death still affects me. I would like to talk to him, find out and understand him. God, I wish he'd shot himself in the head instead of setting himself on fire and blowing up the entire mine. – I said taking a deep breath

– You're furious because you lost Jake because of Richy. You blame him. It's normal.

– You shouldn't be so understanding. I think I need someone to blame so I don't blame myself for the death of .. – his name still hurt – for Jake's death. The problem is that...

– The body was never found.

I nodded, swallowing. For eight months of therapy, I'd been trying to put a wall between my thoughts about the black-haired hacker. I accepted that he died. It was driving me crazy to wonder if he had managed to escape the mine after all, only to be caught by the FBI. Literally. I knew he was dead. He never contacted me again, leaving me with the bittersweet taste of his last three words.

– You never told me about him. You mentioned him only at our first meeting, when you were nothing more than a wreck of a human. – she said, and I understood her unspoken request to tell about him

Uncontrollably, my mind began to flood with memories of our conversations that I had so strongly resisted. I remembered the sweet smiles he used to send me, how we analyzed things together and how good team we were. I remember him confessing that I was fascinating to him. He could text me things that made my heart beat faster and my breath quicken. He cared for me and defended me when the group attacked me with their vote. At some point, he was my everything.

– I can see that he must have been someone special, that you flew away like that. – she said, a small smirk playing at the corners of her lips

I bit my lip to hold back my smile.

– And he was. He really was. Of the whole group, he was the only one worth trusting.

– Why do you think so? You told me about Jessy. You told me about all of them and the friendship you made.

I bit the inside of my cheek, feeling extremely uncomfortable.

– I haven't spoken to any of them in almost five years. Hannah at Richy's funeral gave me enough reasons to disassociate myself from them.

– The group had no influence on what the traumatized Hannah accused you of. – she cut into my sentence

– But no one interrupted her. Nobody took my side or Jake's side. – I answered a little harsher than I had planned. – She made me mud, blaming me for Richy's and Jake's death. From taking Jake away from her. And then no one dared say a word to her. Dan and Thomas were happy as if nothing had happened. They didn't give a shit what happened to Jake! They didn't care at all but that fucking Hannah had been found, completely forgetting who had helped find her! Jake had dropped everything for her, and his death hadn't affected them at all.

– How did Lilly react? It was her brother, after all.

– She apologized to me for Hannah after everything. She put it down to her trauma, but you know what? I didn't give a shit at all then. Lilly was the only one who tried to keep in touch with me.

– But you cut them off after returning from Duskwood. How did you do that? How did you manage to cut yourself off from an important part of your life back then?

I bit my lip as I thought about my answer. My eyes became slightly misted from not blinking for a long time.

– I started to imagine a world where we don't collide. A world where Hannah hadn't sent those stupid few numbers to her stupid boyfriend who thought it was someone else's number. A world where I wouldn't reply to them at all. And most of all, I imagined life in a world where I wouldn't fall in love with this wanted hacker. – I gasped as I felt my pulse quicken

The therapist looked at me with satisfaction in her eyes, because I finally opened up to her. I got carried away by my emotions.

– What are you going to do with this invitation?

I swallowed hard, feeling my nails almost pierce the center of my palm. It was supposed to help me, but it only unleashed a storm inside my mind.

– I'll burn them.

The therapist smiled slightly, knowing full well that it wasn't true.

jake🤝girls with daddy issues

is it boredom talking or is a smut with a sub jake fucking awesome idea

i just watched hannibal and

will graham as jake???

L.E.S.

pairing: Jakexfem!MC

summary: It was supposed to be a normal night in Aurora, but too many drinks, an argument, jealousy and lust changed everything.

warnings: sexual content, light sub!Jake, dom!MC, very possessive MC, lot of cursing

words: 4k

author's note: i don't like it very much, share your opinion in the comment🙏 i was inspired to write by the song les childish gambino, hence the title. enjoy reading!

After many months of continuous and exhausting fight for Jake's freedom, we finally succeeded. Of course, it wasn't perfect, it's rather normal, I knew perfectly well that life with him would not be stable or normal, but I was happy. After many days of destructive storm, there was a clearing up and a few rays of warm sun. We saw a light at the end of our road that I traveled with him. Hand in hand.

Jake agreed to a deal with the FBI. He was one of the best hackers in the world, and they needed someone like him. Especially now that they were chasing a gang of cybercriminals who were also human traffickers. Jake only because of me, for which I was eternally grateful. Finally, I could go to sleep normally and not be afraid if he was still alive or had already been captured and killed for stealing state secrets.

Well, it was even better. We moved in together in Duskwood a few days ago so Jake could catch up with his sisters. I wasn't against it either - after all, I had new friends here. Jessy, Dan, and Lilly have become more important to me than I thought they would become. Hannah and I were just getting to know each other, but I saw a mirror image of Jake in her. They were both rather quiet in the crowd, and it's only when you get to know them better that you see their funny and sociable side. Thomas and Cleo remained a walking mystery to me. During the Hannah investigation, I noticed how Cleo behaved around Thomas. She was always by his side, always wanted to accompany him, always gave him a sweet smile whenever needed. It was quite suspicious, especially since after finding Hannah it was still the same. When Hannah was in the hospital, Cleo was the first to help Thomas with something around the house and so on. I thought it was probably just their habit, after all, she wouldn't betray her best friend? Thomas didn't seem like the type to cheat on his missing girlfriend either, so I always pushed those thoughts as far away as possible.

But the situation changed dramatically. These were no longer just sick guesses during the investigation bout people I only knew on the phone. No. This time we were all together, surrounded by loud music, sitting at one of the tables in Aurora, celebrating the engagement of Hannah and Thomas. And this time my thoughts did not revolve around them, but around the black-haired man sitting across from me.

It started from the moment I entered the club. Cleo greeted Jake - nicer than usual. I didn't pay much attention to it at the time, we were all friends, and I was glad to see Jake opening up to them more and more. That's when I let go of his hand because Jessy was waving at me at the bar, so I whispered to my boyfriend to take our seats at the table and that I'd be right back. I was surprised when I came back together with the redhead, and Jake was sitting quite tense between Cleo and Dan, and two seats were left only with Lilly. But I brushed it aside, because we were all friends, right?

I didn't really shake it up. I promise! I got into an interesting conversation with Jessy, Lilly and Hannah about her engagement ring, forgetting about Cleo's strange greeting. But I got suspicious when she started talking to him at the table where I was also sitting. We never officially announced to them that we are together, but it was clear and transparent? We moved in together in Duskwood - that must have put her on that track.

– Jake, would you pass me that sauce? – she asked, her lips stretched into a sweet smile. No wonder, right? But I was sitting closest to the sauce, so why couldn't she ask me? Jake nodded and handed her the sauce, and was soon talking to Dan about something. From hate to friendship, huh? At this table sat two pieces of evidence that separated them by a fine line: Me and Lilly, and the men just mentioned.

I clenched my jaw all evening and didn't say anything stupid, nothing that would ruin night that belonged to Hannah and Thomas. I ignored all her smiles, winks, and leaning in so that her tits were level with his eyes. But the moment she walked with the glass and her hand accidentally slipped onto his black shirt turned the cup of bitterness.

– Oh God, I'm sorry! I didn't want to stain your shirt. – she stuttered quickly, her hands touching the spots on his chest. They've been there too long. Much too long than just checking how big the stain is.

Maybe I was a little jealous.

Touch him again and you're dead.

I must admit I am a little possessive.

Very possessive.

– Nothing happened. – Jake mumbled quickly, but Cleo was still apologizing to him. – Really, Cleo is nothing. Just a stain, it'll dry soon. – he said grabbing her shoulders to calm her down

I felt my blood start to boil and I wondered if that was what Jake felt when Phil leaned against me?

But she touched him. And he touched her, and apparently he has no problem with it. Then he looked at me and smiled softly, and I realized that I hadn't spoken to him since arriving here. Cleo must have kept him busy.

– Jake, we should wash your shirt to make sure you don't leave a stain. – I heard Cleo's comment, which immediately sobered me up. What the fuck?

– I'll fix it. – I said quickly and gave her the most believable smile. I don't know if I succeeded because I felt it came out more like a grimace. The black-haired hacker nodded and followed me, and I followed the direction known only to myself.

Jake caught up with me and grabbed my hand

– Wait, where are you going? – he asked not knowing what was going on. – These are the bathrooms for the staff.

I smiled enticingly as understanding flooded his body. He opened his eyes wide and I grabbed the collar of his shirt and dragged him into the empty toilet. There was no one in it, so I locked the door, and then without thinking I bit into the hacker's mouth with as much force as I don't think I've ever had before. I was hungry for his touch, and the taste of tequila on his lips made me even thirstier. I pinned him against the wall, deepening the kiss, now tasting the different flavors of the drinks on his tongue. He fought for dominance in the kiss, but quickly gave up feeling my determination. I wanted to remind him who he was in a relationship with and who he belonged to. His hands roamed my back and finally reached my hips, which he squeezed tightly. I moaned right into his lips, undoing the first buttons of his black shirt. All evening I had to keep my mind from tearing his beautiful clothes, which made him look damn good.

– MC, what's come over you? He mumbled between kisses against my swollen lips

– You just look like a Greek God today – I croaked avoiding his gaze, but the boy didn't believe me – Okay, okay! I just don't like it when some other girl.. filrts with you?

Jake's eyes widened in question. I snorted in response.

– Don't pretend you didn't see it either. Cleo has been sticking to you since we got here. – I swallowed hard

Jake raised his eyebrows

– You were jealous of Cleo?

I didn't answer, biting the inside of my cheek. Damn, that's more embarrassing than I thought.

– You are jealous. – His tone made it clear that he was pleased with the state I was in, but there was also a note of surprise in it.

I sighed heavily, then one of my hands moved to his hair, which I lightly tugged, and the other to his throat. I tightened my grip slightly, and my wet lips began to trail kisses down his jaw and the side of his neck. I felt his heart beating faster and his hands tightened on my hips. Soon all that could be heard in the bathroom was muffled club music and his heavy breathing. After a moment, I kissed him deep on the mouth again before breaking the kiss.

– I'm not the jealous type, but what's mine is mine. – I whispered, tightening my hand on his throat a little more. I could feel his rapid pulse under my fingers. At that point, I wasn't surprised why he was always the one taking control of the bed matters. The feeling of domination was damn nice and addictive. Jake was the type of person who had to keep things under control. Every little detail. – It pisses me off when someone tries their luck with my puppy.

I said the last sentence half jokingly, half seriously - I wanted to prove to the hacker that he wasn't the only one who was a master at coming up with nicknames in situations like this. I heard his muffled chuckle, then quickly turned me around, pinning me against the wall. His lips attacked my neck and a soft moan escaped my lips. I felt his erection against my lower belly, and I couldn't help but smile. I was glad that he liked me in a different version than the one he was used to.

I pushed him away a little and he gave me a hazy look and I just smiled at him.

- I want a ride. – I bit my lip and started pushing him towards the toilet so he could sit down

Startled, he sat down and I straddled him, slowly rolling up my dress. He watched me with wet, swollen lips and drooping eyelids.God, I was ready to kill for this view.

– How do you feel about what we're going to do here? In a public restroom where anyone with a key could find us? – I whispered sensually into his ear as I tried to undo his fly

– Like a criminal. – he replied, breathing heavily. – It's more tempting than stealing state secrets.

I laughed darkly and was about to take off his boxers when we heard a loud knock. I jumped off the boy, and he was visibly flushed in the rush to zip up his fly and shirt. Well, he couldn't hide the red spots on his neck from my kisses or my rapid breathing like I did. I hastily smoothed my dress, then opened the door, ready for a reprimand from some employee. To my surprise, none other than Cleo was standing there. I closed my eyes for five seconds, letting out an angry, shaky breath, and she giggled.

– I think you've got the wrong bathroom, MC. – she said, and I looked at her with dubious faith in her intelligence. – And you were gone so long that I thought something had happened.

My patience is over. If she didn't understand any subtle signs, I had to explain it to her face. She went too far and I was able to stand up for myself.

She passed Jake and I saw that she was barely standing. She really was experiencing the engagement more than I thought. I asked my boyfriend to leave because I was going to explain to her how things were.

She smiled at me, but not as charmingly as at the black-haired girl. I smiled back and walked over to the nearby sink to wash my hands.

– It's pretty hot in there, isn't it? – she asked, trying to make some sort of conversation

I could break her nose right now if I wanted to. Or her jaw? Or would her hand be in better shape so that she could no longer touch any taken man?

MC get over yourself!

– Yes, quite. – I replied by turning off the tap and reaching for the paper. – Listen, do you like Jake?

The question came out of my mouth before I even planned to ask it. Damn, do I always have to talk first and think later?

– W-what kind of question is that? - She replied confused, trying to hide her nervousness. I shrugged, tossing the wet paper into the wastebasket.

– You know.. he is devilishly smart, he has exceptional abilities. – I began to exchange innocently, still maintaining a friendly tone of voice. I started to approach her and when I was less than half a meter away I added – And he's so handsome.

Cleo blushed and her eyes widened.

– Come on, Cleo, go ahead. – I gave her a friendly laugh and it was probably one of the most fake smiles in my entire life. I was pissed off that I only enjoyed Jake for a few days, and someone else was already trying their luck. – You weren't as discreet as you thought.

– Um, well he's alright. – she replied avoiding eye contact and my smile disappeared.

– So what the fuck you want from him? You want to fuck him? – I asked, losing my wits and patience. Cleo looked at me, and I saw how her expression was overcome by anger

– Watch your words, MC. – She threatened me and I snorted – You have such big complexes that you are afraid that Jake will cheat on you? Or maybe you see that you are not enough for him?

My lips parted slightly in disbelief at her words. Was it her thoughts for a long time, or was it just the result of her weak head for the drinks she had here? I can't remember the last time I was this fucking furious. She thought she was better for Jake?

– Who the fuck do you think you're talking to? – I asked loudly and with the fury that had been gathering in me since arriving here. – What the fuck you think you're doing? You think you're better because you're hitting on taken men? When one gets engaged to your friend, you go on to the next one? – I let out a mocking, dry laugh. –You know what I can give you. Keep your shitty nose out of other people relationships. Especially mine.

When she didn't answer, I moved even closer and said in her ear, emphasized every word.

– Get your filthy hands from my man.

Then I left it there, walking out and heading towards the table where my friends were sitting.

– We have to go. – I said, feigning a contrite and sad expression on my face, and Jake visibly swallowed, still flushed. – We'll call you and see you soon.

We said goodbye and congratulated Hannah and Thomas one last time on their engagement. Cleo didn't come until we left, which I took as my little victory.

* * *

I smiled at the sight of the hacker lying naked in our bed. He was breathing hard, and all the words he wanted to say to me died in his throat when he saw me in my underwear. Especially for this occasion, I wore a black, lace set for him, which was quite translucent, because it consisted mainly of mesh and a few stripes. I approached the corner of the bed, tilting my head slightly.

– Well.. How do you like it? – I asked, referring to our first conversation, to which he responded with a soft laugh

– I don't know what you mean. – he feigned thought, quoting my first words to him

I clucked in displeasure, then sat down in the armchair next to the bed, still watching him closely.

– You're quite saucy for the adorable puppy that you are. – I said, biting the inside of my cheek as I thought about the punishment for the disobedient boy

– If I am your adorable puppy do I get any puppy privileges? – he sneered, trying to hide his excitement under a mask of laughter, but I could see his body language that almost begged for it

– I do not think so. Only good puppies get privileges, you deserve only punishment. – I replied with a small smirk on my lips. Jake fell silent, still staring straight into my eyes. – Damn, I have so many ideas, but I can't decide on one.

Hacker gave me a questioning look, and I began to speak, modulating my voice slightly to sound more attractive.

– I could get naked and grind on your dick, watching as you squirm underneath me, every inch of dominance leaving you as you fully succumb to me, begging to put you inside of me. – I started slowly, seeing every little reaction from him to my words. His chest began to heave faster and more often, and his cock hardened even more.

– Or – I smiled – I could stay in that chair and make you watch me pleasure myself. You would hear my every moan, and all you could do was beg for mercy, to let me touch you. – I looked down at my red nails as a soft moan escaped his lips

– Or

– N-no – he purred

– Or I could do absolutely nothing but tell you all the dirty things I want to do with you right now. You don't even know how hot you are when you're whimpering and fighting for control over yourself and your desires.

– MC..

– Mm? – I clucked in displeasure at his words. – Where are your manners?

– P-please. – he stuttered, his cock twitching. I continued to stare at him expectantly until he finally understood. – Please m'am.

I licked my lips contentedly, then my hands began to roam my body. His whimpers were incredibly hot. I touched my breasts lightly, finally pushing aside the fabric of my lace panties and touching my wetness. I moaned softly, circling over my clit, feeling his eyes all over my body. He couldn't touch himself, he was doomed to watch me enjoy myself. My movements got faster and faster and my moans got louder. I opened my eyes and saw Jake staring at me with such adoration and reverence that I had never seen in anyone else. I groan at the mere sight of him, and his head tilted back in convulsions of pleasurable pain.

– Please what? – I asked, breathing heavily but slowing my hand movements, regaining control

– Let me touch you. – he whined – God, please let me touch you.

I smiled indulgently, then got up from the chair and approached the desperate man. I climbed on top of him, straddling his hips. I immediately felt his hard erection which made me snarl loudly. I leaned down, placing my hand on the back of his hair to pull his head back hard. He hissed in a slight pain, and I started to plant wet kisses all the way down his throat, sucking on his most sensitive spot, which made a whimper crawl out of his throat. His hands tightened on my hips, which he began to move to get any friction. Our wet lips met again in a hungry, needy, passionate kiss. Our moans mingled to form one common rhythm.

I pulled away from his mouth and started to move my lips lower and lower, kissing his shoulders, collarbones, nicely defined muscles of his stomach. I looked up, making contact with the hacker, who looked so beautiful at that moment that I wanted to cry. I wanted to shout to the whole world that this beautiful and breathtaking man was mine. He was illuminated only by streaks of moon that streamed through the window, enhancing its otherworldly appearance. The young hacker was mesmerizing. His jet-black, now very messy hair, his godly face, his prominent clavicles, slight muscles of his arms and stomach, and the paleness of his skin. God, only you knew how delighted and lost I was in him.

I licked my lips and kissed the tip of his dick without taking my eyes off him. His lips parted and even heavier breaths came out.

– You are so beautiful – I mumbled, sending a vibration along his dick. – My pretty hackerboy.

I saw his cheeks blush, which made my heart beat even faster.

I teased the head of his cock a bit with the tip of my tongue, and as I licked the entire length of it before closing it in my mouth, I heard him curse loudly and groan.

– Oh, fuck.

I started out calmly to tease him a little more, but soon I sped up my movements, experimenting harder and moving my head faster. Jake wasn't afraid to show his pleasure, which made him even more attractive. His loud and desperate moans left me completely soaked. I felt that the boy was close to orgasm, so I stopped what I was doing and lifted my head. He looked at me with slight annoyance that I had ruined his orgasm and I gave him an innocent smirk.

– Doesn't feel so great, does it? – I asked before straddling his hips again. – Open your mouth for me.

Jake complied obediently, opening his mouth and I inserted two fingers, which he eagerly began to suck gently. I hummed contentedly, lifted my hips slightly, and started teasing him with my entrance. A muffled moan escaped his lips, and I slowly, unhurriedly lowered myself to him, feeling his length stretching me out. I groaned in delight, pulling my fingers from his mouth.Jake's eyes rolled to the back of his head.

– Fuck, MC y-you feel so good. – he gasped

– Mmm, like that? – I teased – So, I guess I can continue?

– Yes. – he barely breathed, and my hand grabbed his jaw, forcing him to look at me. –Please MC. – he begged, and I felt the satisfaction of power coursing through my body

I rode him passionately, and waves of pleasure flowed through my body, bringing me closer to fulfillment. His hands were on my hips and assisted my movements, our lips connected in hot kisses every now and then and faded away in moans and the sound of our bodies bouncing. At one point, Jake rose slightly, catching me in a tight hug, his hands landing on my back. I wrapped my thighs tighter around his hips, tugging hard on the ends of his hair.

– Tell me who you belong to. – I breathed heavily into his mouth

– I'm yours and yours only. – he replied immediately, his words bringing me to orgasm, which I accepted with a loud and desperate yelp that was practically a scream. – Oh, fuck! – hacker cried as I tightened on him

– I've got my eyes only on you. – he added in a hoarse whisper prolonging my high.

With those words, I felt that he came, filling me with his cum. His eyes rolled back once more, and from his mouth came the most sinful groan I've ever had the pleasure of hearing.

It took us a few moments to calm down and control the mercilessly fast beating of our hearts. We were still in the same position, I was sitting on him, he was soothingly drawing circles on my back and I was whispering words of praise to him like "you have done very well for me", "you were amazing" and a few others that even I didn't register. Jake was flushed and very flattered by my praise, which melted my heart. This man was so unaccustomed to compliments that I decided I had to change that. Especially now when we started living together in our home.

Finally, exhausted, we lay down, lying on each other's sides so that we could see each other's faces. Jake gently smoothed a strand of my hair. Suddenly I felt the urge to cry. Damn, what if Cleo was right about me not deserving of him?

– Everything's all right? – he asked quietly, and I bit the inside of my cheek. We both agreed that if we wanted to have a healthy relationship, we had to communicate with each other. Shit, I was the one who said it, so I couldn't be a hypocrite now.

– I'm sorry if I ruined your evening. – I whispered. – You probably wanted to stay with Hannah, and I made a jealous scene..

– Stop. – he interrupted me. – Believe me, I much prefer an evening in our bed than in Aurora. And wow, I've never seen you like this.

I chuckled a little and gave him a slightly provocative look.

– Yes? And how did you like it?

– It's terrifying, but... – he leaned in and started kissing my neck. – You've never been hotter. You don't even know how power and demanding suits you.

I exhaled hotly, and his lips traveled to the place under my ear.

– You don't have to worry about Cleo or anyone else. You've got this man wrapped around your finger, MC. – he whispered, and the hoarse tone of his voice filled with love, lust and reverence made my skin crawl – You are the most fascinating person I have ever laid my eyes on. No other woman compare to you, MC. You said I look like a Greek God? Well you are Aphrodite in the flesh.

Without you

A short story about Richy's funeral and how MC is coping after the mine fire.

warnings: mention JakexMC, mental breakdown, slight sexual abuse

I stared blankly at the group of people standing in front of me. Nothing caught my attention, all the colors washed into one, and time didn't seem to pass at all. He stopped, but already a week ago. A week ago when I first heard the "MC, the mine blew up. They found a man's body." My cheeks were dry because I wasn't crying anymore. It seemed to me that I got rid of all the water from my body that I had in me.

And when the bronze coffin was lowered into the deep grave, I heard something that I will never forget for the rest of my life. I heard a loud sob that was similar to the moan of a wounded animal that is fighting with all its might to survive. I looked towards the sound and saw a red-haired girl who was clutched by a taller and bigger bearded man. I tensed my whole body and face to stay in place so as not to walk over to her and take her in my arms. Jessy's fregile body trembled with spasms of desperate crying as Dan tried to hold her still. My Jessy, who I always associated with smile, warmth and determination, was now the definition of surrender. And that broke me the most, because why was fate so cruel that it took away even the greatest ray of happiness we had left?

The coffin fell down and was covered with earth. People will remember him as a cheerful and playful mechanic who could always make you feel better. I wasn't sure how I would remember him. Right now, it was just a taste of betrayal I had never experienced before.

My arms were folded over my chest, I stood there with a stony face as my mind stormed. No, it was a typhoon. Murderous and merciless. All I wanted was to silence all these thoughts and go to sleep. To be unaware of all the fuss and chaos for at least one hour. One hour of peace, is that much? But my brain wouldn't give up. It still flooded me with thoughts and anxiety. Jake. What has become of him? Did he die in the mine, and if so, where was his body? If he got away, did the FBI catch him? And they did, I was sure of it. Did they just kill him? Or worse, were they torturing him? I was replaying our last conversation. I love you. He confessed it to me. He actually told me he loved me and I replied the same to him. God, I would give anything to turn back time and stop him from saying those words. Maybe then it would hurt less.

My God, I would give anything to turn back time, get my way and go into that mine alone instead of letting him go there. He wasn't supposed to die there.

– So you showed up.

I turned to a female voice I didn't know yet. However, I immediately recognized the woman standing in front of me. Missing Hannah Donfort stood before me as if nothing had happened.

– Hi, Hannah. Nice to finally meet you. – I made an effort to be friendly but I honestly didn't feel like talking to either of them. Well, maybe except Jessy, because only she could understand what I felt at that moment. I felt a special bond between me, Jessy, and Richy. It wasn't a big deal, but it was ours. Our little something that gave me a certain sense of belonging to their group.I scanned the people around her.

Seeing them all was very strange and almost stressful, because our contact so far was only by phone. Thomas was standing next to her, giving me a not-so-pleasant look. In fact, he almost always had that look on his face, so I wasn't too concerned. After all, I didn't like him much after all the stupid things he'd done while looking for his girlfriend.

On the other side of her, I recognized her sister, Lilly. Our relationship was... dynamic. From a lot of hatred to a quite successful friendship, the only thing that separated us was solving the puzzle together with Jake. The blonde gave me a soft smile and I couldn't help but wonder if Jake's smile would be similar to hers? Did the color of her eyes resemble his? Did the warmth of her gaze even remotely reflect his? They were half siblings after all, they must have had something in common. Lilly seems to have sensed that I was thinking of a hacker because her face turned violently sad.

And behind them stood Dan, who was still hugging Jessy, but she wasn't crying anymore. The mascara had dried on her cheeks, and she stared at me with the same dull eyes that I had a dozen or so minutes ago. She stared at me and her eyes were so... alien. With one look from her, I understood that our first meeting would be without a smile and a warm hug.

– How dare you come here? – I was snapped out of watching the others by Hannah's sharp question. – Who invited you? What happened wasn't enough for you?

What the fuck?

– What are you talking about, Hannah? – I asked cautiously, my jaw clenching tight

– You think I don't know anything? I know Richy wanted you to come to him. Maybe if you'd done that instead of sending Jake there, they'd both still be alive!

I opened my eyes in amazement, and my blood suddenly began to boil. I looked at them all in disbelief to hear that it was some kind of bad joke, but they stood as they had been standing before. Lilly had her eyes fixed on the ground, Thomas continued to stare at me with his dull and unfavorable gaze, and Jessy, even though she was looking at me, I knew that her heart was somewhere else.

– You know shit. You don't know anything about what really happened, so don't accuse me. – I growled at her, losing patience. The girl I didn't know, and yet to whom I gave the last months of my life, made me mud, and the people I helped didn't even defend me with a single word.

– Oh yeah? So it wasn't like Richy wanted you to come to Duskwood and you agreed to let Jake go instead of you? – she asked in a venomous tone and I fell silent. Because basically that's exactly how it was. – It wasn't like you used him to save your own skin? It wasn't like you knew full well it could kill him and you still agreed to it? It wasn't like you let him die instead of you?

– Shut up. – I mumbled, but she didn't listen to me. She kept stabbing daggers into my bleeding heart. – I said, shut up!

I was breathing fast and my heart was beating mercilessly fast causing a sharp pain in my chest. Nobody interrupted her. They all think I'm the cause of Richy's death. Jake's death.

– And now you're boasting because you think he did it for you? – she asked and I felt myself falling apart. – Do you think he cared about you? He's only been using you the whole time to find me.

I stared at her not understanding a single word. One sentence from her and I knew she was still in love with the hacker. I glanced briefly at Lilly, who shook her head slightly. She did not know.

So why should I pretend I'm okay when I'm not? Should I allow myself to be treated this way by the person for whose search I gave all my strength?

– And you're still in love with the boy who blew you off. – I said dryly. – Hannah, tell me, don't you have at least a little respect not to start an argument in the cemetery right after we buried our friend?!

A dry snort escaped her lips.

– Don't make me laugh, MC. Just accept that you should never get involved in this. If you hadn't, our friends would still be alive.

Once again, surprise flashed across my face. She.. didn't know she sent them my number?

I had enough. It was her game that I wasn't going to play anymore. I moved forward, passing everyone I had called friends before.

– Before you start to accuse me again, ask them how it really was. Go ahead, ask Thomas why I got involved. Ask them how you ruined my life.

Lilly grabbed my hand, but I pulled away from her grip. I couldn't and didn't want to look at them. Not now and never in my life.

* * *

Crowd, sweaty bodies and alcohol. These three things accompanied me that evening. I didn't count the amount of high-proof liquors I drank. They were not colorful, light drinks, but pure vodka, which allowed me to forget faster. Get away from what happened. I danced, wiggling my hips, brushing against random people as neon and flickering lights illuminated my tired face.

At one point I swallowed some colored pills that were given to me - but I didn't care. At that moment, I would swallow anything that would give me a moment of solace. One minute I was dancing with a girl I didn't know, and the next I was pinned against the bathroom wall, kissed by an older man.

My body was sticky from alcohol, sweat and other unknown substances. I felt my hair tangled. At that moment, I only wanted one thing. Death. I wanted to cry. Oh god, I wanted to howl as loud as I could, but not even a single tear ran down my dead face. The man covered my skin with more wet kisses. He alternately drooled my cleavage, neck and shoulders, and I just stared blankly ahead and begged for someone to end it.

I don't know how, but I freed myself from the man's tight grip. Perhaps someone sent me a guardian angel, perhaps someone took pity on the girl who drank too much, and perhaps I regained some strength to oppose him. I didn't remember how I got to the motel room, but I only woke up when I ran into the bathroom. I didn't hesitate - I immediately staggered to the shower.

I clumsily opened the glass door of the cabin, and then my legs refused to obey. I fell onto the white paddling pool, bruising my knees painfully. I put my hands on the glass, trying to get air, but the harder I did, the more I was suffocating. My head throbbed and my body writhed in convulsions of pain. After turning on the tap with water, my hand fell, knocking most of the things off the shelf, making a loud bang. It wasn't important. Feeling the icy water pour over my burning body, I felt as if someone had given me life back.

I sighed, hanging my head, feeling my hair sticking more and more to my forehead. I don't even know when the water started mixing with my tears.

It wasn't like you let him die instead of you?

If you hadn't, our friends would still be alive.

She is right. You are disgustingly selfish. You should die there.

You couldn't handle it so you're off to drink and fuck with some old creep?

You should die there.

A soft, pitiful moan escaped my lips as more trickles began to run down my face. I clenched my trembling fingers against my thighs as hard as I could, crying louder and more wistfully. Nothing mattered to me. Not when I knew I had let the man I loved suffer for me. My lungs refused to obey me, and I felt such a piercing pain that I hadn't felt in a long time. I choked on my own saliva that landed on my chin and hands. At one point, I howled like a wounded animal because I couldn't control it anymore. It was like torture. I begged in my mind for it to end, but absolution never came.

Jake is dead because of you.

I closed my eyes, wrapped my arms around my waist, and screamed again, doubled over. My forehead touched the white paddling pool.

As if behind the fog, I heard someone opening the cabin door. I didn't open my eyes. I closed my eyes tighter when I felt a gentle squeeze on my shoulder, followed by a pleasant smell and warmth emanating from the other person.

– MC, calm down. – he whispered in a trembling voice right into my ear, his trembling fingers running through my wet hair. I pressed my forehead against the hard surface as hard as I could, almost breaking my nails from how hard I pressed them against my skin. – You are safe. I am with you.

– Jake? – I croaked

This voice was like the fulfillment of the most secret desires.

It took me a few long moments to come to my senses. I opened my eyes in an amok, but the vision was very blurry. I blinked slowly.

And when I didn't see anyone there, I felt like someone stab a dagger right through my heart, twirl it hard, then pull it out and leave me to bleed out.

"I've nothing without you

All my dreams and all the lights mean

Nothing without you"

Lana Del Rey

im drowning in my tears

Memories

After receiving an invitation to Hannah and Thomas' wedding, MC tries to get back to her life, but the demons of her past catch up with her faster than she could have expected.

author's note: previous part, thanks to which you can better understand the situation

warnings: slight mention of mental health issues

HANNAH DONFORT

&

THOMAS MILLER

with full hearts,

joyfully invite you to their wedding

I burned holes in the invitation I received with my eyes. I don't know how much time has passed since I sat on the couch and in my trembling hands I grabbed a card decorated with beautiful floral patterns full of colors. They were different from how I felt now. My world was devoid of any colors when I read the first lines of the invitation. When I reopened old wounds. When I reopened my heart to memories and a weird town called Duskwood.

I swore to myself that I would burn them as soon as I got back from the psychologist. I was so sure it would come easily to me. So why have I been sitting in front of the fireplace for over two hours now, wondering what time the next flight would be?

MC, no.

For five years I have been trying to put my life back together. Forget everything the missing Hannah Donfort case has brought to my life. Because this case has completely and irrevocably destroyed my old life.

After the mine explosion, Richy's funeral, and Jake's loss, I'd become a shadow of myself. When I looked in the mirror, I didn't recognize myself. Soon I began to fight my despair with alcohol and parties. I tried to find my dying need and longing for Jake in other men. But no one compared to him. I didn't even know what he looked like or what he sounded like. So why was I so fucked up that I couldn't forget him?

But after two hard years, the first rays of the sun came. I realized that I needed professional help to move on. I wanted to feel alive again, not just existing. Of course, there were times when in the evenings I would sit staring at a blank wall and reminisce. I was reminiscing about the good times spent with my old friends. All the small talks with Jessy. Jokes with Richy.

But there have been no dark moments for so long. I moved on.

And then, as usual, it had to fucked up. Ceremonial, with fireworks fucked up.

My pointless staring at the cluster of letters was interrupted by the loud vibration of my phone. I snapped out of my trance and checked who had disturbed the storm in my mind.

RYAN: You, me, dinner, wine and a movie?

I sighed heavily, trying to force a smile.This news reminded me that Duskwood had done me nothing good. I won a whole new life in which there was no room for either of them.

MC: You don't have to ask twice!

I clenched my jaw as I stared at the fireplace as flames engulfed the wedding invitation. They burned an old part of me.

* * *

I dressed as quietly as I could so as not to wake the boy who was sound asleep. It was almost three in the morning, and I didn't want to stay at Ryan's. I didn't want to wake up next to him in the morning, have breakfast together, and then say goodbye when we both had to go to work. Why? I told myself that I just wasn't made for relationships. I really wanted to believe it. I didn't want to be a bitch who used others for her own pleasure.

That fucking invitation made me think about him again. Even a moment ago, when I was fucking a boy who is in love with me, I was thinking about someone else. I thought about the black-haired wanted criminal who had hacked my mind as well as my heart.

As I was at the door, I heard his hoarse voice.

– I'll never be anything more to you, will I?

With a heavy heart, I turned to look into his brown eyes, where I saw no hatred. I saw understood pain. Because both Ryan and I knew that in the reflection of his brown irises I was still looking for those wistful blue ones.

* * *

I closed the door to my apartment and without even taking off my coat, I walked towards the living room. I glanced briefly in the mirror, again not recognizing myself. I had just broken another person's heart and my face remained stone and so... distant.

– Fucking Jake. – I spat out my first emotion in a long time. Unfortunately, it was anger.

I reached my hand into the drawer where I kept the medication the psychiatrist had given me. My movements were programmed. I've done it millions of times. Without any emotion, I spilled two white pills and placed them on my tongue. Just as I was about to swallow them, my eyes fell on the bar across the room. And it was only a moment. Impulse.

I rushed over to it and opened it. I pulled out the first bottle of vodka I came across and opened it quickly. I didn't even wonder anymore. I spat out two pills that rolled across the floor, then pressed my lips to the neck of the glass. I furrowed my face, feeling the terrible burning in my throat, but I didn't stop. I kept drinking.

I drank until I stopped feeling a little bit.

Common sense screaming for me to stop was completely silenced. At least until I heard my phone vibrate again. I was ready to explain to Ryan that our relationship, although not official, was a mistake and I had never felt anything for him, but I was confused to see that someone texted me from an unknown number.

UNKNOWN NUMBER: MC?

What the fuck? Who are you and why do you bother me drinking another goodbye I caused?

Yes, do I know you?

Deja vu, right? That's how it all started five years ago.

It's me, Lily. I am sorry for writing so late. Did you get an invite?

My breathing quickened. Lilly Donfort broke the tense silence between us after five years.

I did.

I answered briefly and coldly, but I couldn't help it. I also couldn't get out of the conversation and block the blonde's number, even though common sense told me to. But heart and reason rarely listen to each other.

I know you want nothing to do with us.

No shit sherlock.

But it's really important

I snorted and quickly typed out a reply.

I'm not solving your problems anymore

I know

It's about Jessy

My eyes opened tighter. I didn't even have the strength to pretend that the mention of Jessy hadn't moved me.

She's in really bad condition

MC, I'm begging you, only you can help her

One day, five years ago, Jake was right once again. I let my emotions cloud my judgement. So it was this time.

No matter how much time passed, the traumatic events connected me with Jessy forever. With a fragile, red-haired girl whom I had only ever seen cry at our friend's funeral.

Swallowing another sip of alcohol that hurt my throat painfully, I bought a plane ticket to a dark little town called Duskwood.

"There's no good reason in make believing

That we could ever exist again"

Conan Grey

are you ready to be heartbroken because of fic about jake's mother?

Fourth of July

summary: A story about Jake's childhood, youth and mother. (Ophelia) warnings: mention of mental health problems, a little JakexMC words: 3,5k

November 28, 1998

In a quiet and peaceful town, in a lonely hospital, at less than five o'clock in the morning, when a cold autumn morning was waking up to life, another human was born. He wasn't ordinary, he was someone else from the moment he was born. He was different.

Chestnut hair stuck to the sweaty forehead of the woman, who leaned back tiredly, trying to regain her even breathing.

– Just as we predicted. No complications, completely healthy and strong son!

A slight smile appeared on the tired woman's face.

– My little Jacob.

April 4, 2003

– Look. I found a daisy.

Hearing her son's high-pitched voice, the woman of average height looked up from the book she was reading at the little boy in front of her. His watchful gaze was focused on the tiny white flower in his hand, which he proudly held out to his mother.

This day was one of the first warm days of spring, which was the young woman's favorite season. They were surrounded by a forest in which beautiful and breathtaking plants bloomed and the warm rays of the sun enveloped them from the sky.

– It's beautiful, Jake. – she replied in a melodious voice. She sat up from the bench and leaned toward her five-year-old son. – Where did you find it?

– On the meadow. – He shrugged and held out the flower more strongly – It's for you. – added.

The incredibly sweet gesture amused and moved the young mother.

– Wouldn't you like to give it to your brother?

The woman chuckled softly as the boy rolled his eyes.

– I already gave him the stone. He threw it at my head.

She laughed again, but seeing his undisguised indignation, she accepted his gift and promised him that she will punish Kaden. The boy brightened up, and a slight smile appeared on his face, creating dimples on his cheeks.

The young mother once again admired the beauty of her son. Jake was a beautiful kid. He was a little bony for his age, even though he ate for two. His now sunlit face was like that of an angel. His thick hair, the color of dark chocolate pudding, cascaded over his forehead. But what caught his attention the most were his eyes. Beautiful, breath-taking, mesmerizing blue irises stood out on his innocent and charming face. Her heart clenched as she looked into her son's eyes, which were an identical reflection of his father's. Nathan Donfort.

She didn't want to remember the man who had completely broken her heart, so she thought back to Jake and began to fix his hair, which had been loosened by the sudden gust of wind.

She glanced at the white flower in her left hand out of the corner of her eye and swore one thing to herself. She promised herself that she would do everything in her power to keep her son exactly as he is now. Pure, innocent and free from any sin. She promised herself that she would make sure that Jake would always be as free, carefree and happy as he was now.

December 22, 2009

Christmas was fast approaching. Therefore, no one was surprised by the noise in the apartment, where a few more people were supposed to gather. In addition to Jake, Kaden and their mother, their grandmother and uncle were coming with their family. The whole apartment was nicely and climatically decorated, and the smell of home-made Christmas dishes was wafting, creating only increasing impatience in young boys.

– Kaden, how many times do I have to tell you that these gingerbread cookies are for Christmas? – she asked in a loud and slightly tired voice from the preparations, but she couldn't help but smile when she saw the boys running around the kitchen dressed in Santa hats. She went back to turning the meat in the pan when she heard a loud thump on their door. Surprised, she walked towards the entrance of the apartment, then opened the door. And it was one of the biggest mistakes of her life. Because she found no one else there but Nathan Donfort himself.

– Hello, Ophelia.

Her whole body stiffened and her heart stopped. She couldn't get a word out. She just stood there, staring at the face of the man she would sell her soul for one day.

– Mom? Who is this man?

She didn't know which of the boys had asked those questions. It didn't matter to her, even though he was the father of only one of them, she didn't want any of her sons to have anything to do with this man. So she left the apartment and quickly slammed the door. They were facing each other now, looking at each other with eyes that were so different and distant from the ones they had shared in the past.

– What do you want, Nathan? – She uttered the coldest, emotionless tone she could muster

– It's Christmas. I wanted to… – he started but got stuck in the middle. He tried a few more times, but each time he stopped as if he didn't know what he was doing here. – I wanted to meet my son.

The woman burst into a sharp, dry laugh. Damn, that asshole had more guts than she ever thought possible.

– All of a sudden? After eleven years, you remember that you have a son? – she asked, not believing in his insolence. – Spare yourself, Nathan. I'm not seventeen anymore, you can't manipulate me like you used to.

– That was never my target.

More dry lies.

– So what is it? You've had an argument with your wife again and you're looking for solace in a one-time whore you'll dump as soon as you find out she's pregnant? – she gasped as her emotions took over her. The inside screamed at her to go back inside and she wouldn't listen to a word of that son of a bitch anymore, but she couldn't. She couldn't take her eyes off the face of the man she once loved most in the world.

– I didn't come here to resolve our conflict. – he growled unpleasantly – I came because I believe that our son deserves a father. He deserves better.

– You mean our conflict is that when I told you I was pregnant, you called me names and left me alone? Right, it's nothing that bad! – she raised her voice, feeling the first burning tears under her eyelids – And he is by no means your son! You lost father's name when you abandoned us eleven years ago. He lived eleven years without you, and believe me, he deserves better than a momentary hope. Because that's who you are, Nathan. You give people momentary attention and hope and then brutally take it away and push people to the bottom.

She was about to return to her apartment after these words, but she looked at him one last time.

– By the way, what's your younger daughter's name? Ah, Lilly, that's right. Maybe you won't screw up with her like you did with Jake.

She slammed the door behind her and slid down it, finally falling to the floor. She would love to go back to the time when everything was fine. When the sun was out and Jake brought her a plucked daisy. She thought that moment would last forever. That they will always be so incredibly happy.

But the sky was not always cloudless. Unfortunately, the sun sometimes went down, and that Christmas day over Jake's house it went down too fast. And never came back.

November 28, 2012

– Happy birthday, sweetheart!

His grandmother's hand fell from his eyes, revealing a brand new, first ever computer he had ever owned. The then fourteen-year-old boy opened his eyes wide in surprise and looked at the older woman doubtfully. Well, he knew they didn't have the money for such expensive equipment.

– But from where? And how?

But his grandmother interrupted him"

– Don't worry so much, Jake. It's your birthday! Come on, grandma made you a delicious cake. Your favourite. – she smiled warmly at him, and the boy felt the warmth spreading inside him

– Is mom joining us? – he asked only hoping for an affirmative answer – I haven't seen her here for so long.

The old woman tensed up, but tried not to let him know that something was wrong. She smiled at him again, pushing him towards the table. She bit her lip and replied.

– Your mother took an extra job, which is why she's been gone so long. But I promise she'll be back soon. – she said truthfully, a little sadly.

Jake had abruptly blacked out because he had just found out that his mom was working a few jobs just to keep him entertained. Only once did he mention how much he likes IT classes, and she decided to sacrifice her well-being and exhaust herself in several jobs. It was then that he felt for the first time that he didn't deserve someone.

He felt it in such moments, when he saw empty packets of various pills, prescriptions from psychiatrists and sleepless, crying nights. For several years, Ophelia was sinking into an increasingly advanced depression, although she did not want to admit it to her sons. And it got worse as she watched the family of her ex-lover, Nathan Donfort, more and more. She saw all the photos his wife posted, which showed a complete family with two beautiful daughters. Smiling, happy and so full of love. Bitterness, sadness and rage seized her and dragged her down.

Jake was mature enough to understand the situation. It was when he turned fourteen and later fifteen that he and his mother began to have heated arguments about his father. The boy wanted to know who his father was, he wanted to meet him. No. He wanted to know why he abandoned them. Ophelia always brushed him off and never gave an answer. The boy didn't want to blame her - he had seen the condition she was in, which was mostly caused by Nathan Donfort. He never blamed her.

But he couldn't help his growing curiosity about his roots and the fact that he got in touch with his older half-sister Hannah thanks to the computer they had given him. When, after a few months of exchanging messages and talking with sister, his mother found out about it, their relation deteriorated even more. And now two people were blaming each other for Nathan's departure. Ophelia about being an insufficient woman, and Jake about being an unwanted child. Because Hannah also told the boy many things about her family, including her father. She portrayed him as a loving and caring father and husband. So what were they better at? What was the fault of a young, then seventeen-year-old girl completely blinded by love for an older man? And what was the fault of the defenseless and unawared boy with black hair and an innocent smile?

Jake felt rejected. Unwanted. Furious that, compared to him, Kaden had a perfectly normal father. Yes, he wasn't with their mom either, but he didn't abandon his son. So many times he wanted to tell Hannah the truth about what kind of man their father really was. However, he never did. He didn't want to be the reason their perfect family broke up.

When he didn't want to hurt his mother any more by soughting contact with the family of the man who broke her heart so he decided to break off contact with Hannah. But it was damn hard, because for unknown reasons, he became very attached to his unawared sister. The situation began to spiral out of control when girl began to show strange emotions towards him. Suggestions. He had no idea how he hadn't noticed it before. He was never good at interpersonal relationships. Hannah crossed the line when she sent him a picture in nothing but a bra. Jake reacted immediately, blaming himself for not finishing it sooner. He cut off contact with her, never returning to the topic in the years that followed.

November 31, 2016

He was awakened by the strong and poisonous smell of smoke. Disoriented and sleepy, he had no idea what was going on. The only sound he heard was the loud snoring of Kaden, who was sleeping on the bed next to him. He listened for a moment, and when another strange noise reached him, he stood up as if scalded. It sounded like... burning. Almost falling over the clothes scattered on the floor, he reached his sleeping brother and shook his body hard, screaming his name. A sleepy Kaden began to accuse him of interrupting his best erotic sleep with Pamela Anderson, but when he heard what was going on, he immediately turned serious and ran to wake up their mother.

Jake knew perfectly well what had caused the house fire. In the last few months he has become more and more interested in hacking and may have messed with some dangerous people. He didn't know what the consequences of his actions would be. He was just a kid who devoted himself to his passion and went down the wrong path for many. A path from which there was no return.

The three were forced to jump and escape through the window due to the flames cutting off their access to the door. Ophelia was slightly intoxicated from the sleeping pills she had taken the night before, making her unable to drive. Jake couldn't waste another moment, his pursuers might be right behind them. After all, they must have been somewhere in the area, after all, they set fire to his house.

– Jake, where are we going? – Kaden asked quietly, scared. Usually he was resolute and exuded ironic jokes, but now he knew how serious the situation was. All he knew was that his older brother was a hacker, and he was damn good at it despite his young age. It wasn't hard to guess that it was easy to get under the skin of the wrong people.

– Somewhere far. We'll stay at a hotel. And tomorrow we'll go to grandma's. – Jake tried to calm his younger brother, even though he knew perfectly well that he would never let his problems endanger another person close to him. He didn't want to admit it, but deep down he knew what he had to do.

He was driving dangerously fast, constantly veering onto country side roads, trying to avoid the traffic. With every mile that passed, he felt worse and worse, more and more guilty.

When they finally arrived at a town that was reasonably safe from being tracked until morning at least, he accommodated the three of them at the first hotel he came across. The receptionist gave a strange look to the black-haired boy who was supporting the barely conscious middle-aged woman, but she didn't ask any questions.

They entered the room they had been given, and Jake led his mother over to the couch. Just as he was about to leave her there, he felt her fists wrap tightly around his sweatshirt, not letting him leave.

– What's going on? – she hoarsed, and the boy looked at her face with a heavy heart. Her pupils were dilated and hands were shaking. Seeing her so lost broke his scarred heart. – What have you gotten yourself into, honey? Can I help you somehow?

Jake clenched his jaw tight to keep from crying.

– No. I can handle it. – he stammered, but his mother's embrace did not ease. Even though his eyesight was beginning to blur from the accumulated tears, he managed a gentle smile. – Don't worry, mom. Everything will be fine.

– Okay. I believe you, Jake. I believe you can fix everything. But promise me something. – he stopped, looking into his eyes, wiping a tear from his cheek.

– What?

– Don't get yourself into trouble any more. – she whispered, her voice breaking. –Whenever you need me, I'll be here. Please, don't ever leave me. I need you, honey.

More tears ran down Jake's cheeks.

– I promise.

But that same night he broke his promise. He broke it when he left the hotel in the morning, leaving his two closest people there. He left a part of himself that he never got back.

4 July 2022

A young woman was awakened in the middle of the night by a strange noise coming from the living room of their temporary apartment. In the dark, she touched the place next to her with her hand, but found only an empty and cold sheet. Burnt, she opened her eyes and got out of bed, listening to the sounds coming from the bedroom door.

Finally she left it and went to the living room, and the view she found there was forever etched in her memory and broke her heart.

She found Jake there, huddled behind the couch, his face red and wet from the tears that shook his body. The girl's heart completely broke when she heard his heartbreaking sobs. His matted hair fell over his forehead. Tears ran down his pale cheeks as he placed a hand over his eyes. The sight hurt. It hurt so much. She had seen Jake lose hope and be broken many times. The boy fell many times, but that night he fell for real.

He fell the moment when he fell to his knees, tears mixing with his every breath. He fell at the point where he had no strength to fight anymore. He fell the moment his last wall fell. One she had no idea about.

Jake rarely wanted to talk about his family. MC even though she was very curious, she respected his decision and never asked. But when she heard one sentence from him, in some strange, incomprehensible way, she knew.

– She is dead. – he whimpered, barely catching his breath – MC, she's dead.

Without thinking, she ran towards him, knocking over a few things in the process. But it didn't matter. Her eyes blurred with her own tears as she knelt beside him. He was still sobbing like a baby when she wrapped her arms around him with all her strength and pulled him to her chest as if she wanted to protect him from all the evil in the world. And he let her. He leaned against her breast, which he was soaking in increasingly hot tears. She squeezed her eyes shut, kissing and stroking his hair.

There were no words that could ease his pain right now.

– Kaden contacted me. – he croaked after a few minutes – Mom suffered from cancer, recently it got worse. And yesterday she left. She's gone forever, I'll never see her again. I will never hear her laugh or see her smile.

She hugged him even tighter, trying to make him even more comfortable.

– Shhh, I'm here. – she whispered, rubbing his back reassuringly – I'm here and I'm not going anywhere.

– I broke my promise to her. I left her. I should have been there for her, especially recently when she was sick. – he said, his voice breaking and a new spasm of tears seized his fragile body. – I'm just like my father.

– Don't even say that. You saved your mother because you loved her more than anything in the world. You had to do it then so as not to endanger her. I'm sure she knew it.

MC knew perfectly well that losing a loved one was one thing, but not being able to say goodbye was another. And much more hard amd painfull.

They didn't know how much time they spent like that, but the black-haired hacker finally began to calm down. She continued to hold him like a precious treasure, kissing his soft hair. With every minute that passed, he began to breathe more and more steadily, until finally the crying stopped completely. They remained silent.

– I'm destroying everything and everyone I care about.

– No. - she interrupted him with determination, and moved away from him slightly – Jake, paradoxically you are the reason why I did not destroy myself. And I'm sure your mom wasn't angry at you. She must have felt that you were protecting her in this way, just as she had protected you throughout your childhood.

His voice was empty. Exactly as he was inside now. Jake stared blankly ahead, his face red from crying for so long. Bloodshot eyes were still a bit glassy.

MC didn't know what to do next. How to fix it. How to make Jake a little lighter. But she knew that she would do anything to bring her beloved back to peace and happiness.

– Take me to her funeral. – he whispered barely audibly, which made her hug him again – I have to .. I have to say goodbye. And apologize.

At that point, it didn't matter the government or the danger they would expose themselves to. She just couldn't and didn't want to say no.

– Of course. – she replied immediately – We will go there together.

Jake gave her a light, barely noticeable smile. He regretted so much that he had lost so many precious moments that they could have shared together. He wished he had introduced MC to his mother, the woman who had completely changed his life. He was sure she would like her. Sometimes she even resembled her. Both were equally stubborn and defended their own opinion. He would turn back time just to tell his mother how much he loves her and how grateful he is for everything she has done for him. But it was too late for that.

Ophelia's spirit, however, saw it all and was finally able to leave in peace, seeing that her son had finally found his love, soulmate, and above all, the person who saved him from falling to the very bottom.

"It was night when you died, my firefly

What could I have said to raise you from the dead?

Oh could I be the sky on the fourth of july?

We're all gonna die"