Loser Reader - Tumblr Posts
Loser Darling is a monster fucker through and through. They've had a harem of sex demons, numerous ghost lady yans, not one but two gods willing to jump those bones...
All this to say while they may think the human, innocent looking Damsel is cute. They'd much rather have the uncanny horror of their true form.
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Damsel: Thank you for letting me stay in your apartment until my roommate returns! It's just raining so hard out there and I lost my keys
Loser Darling, eyes glued to their phone: Yea, sure, whatever- You put your foot in the door when I tried to close it so it's not like I had a choice-
Damsel, scooting closer to them: Maybe there's some way I can...repay you?
Loser Darling, shrinking into their corner of the couch: I'm good, thanks. Just drink your water and leave me alone, please-
Damsel: Fiiiine [lifts their cup to their lips - forgetting they're in the company of another for a split second as several tendrils pour from their mouth like ink, absorbing the fluid. They realize their blunder as they hear the sound of shuffling clothes]
Damsel: Mmm so good..... [Internally] Did they see? Maybe I should erase-
Loser Darling, pants nowhere to be seen: Hey. Why the fuck do you still have your clothes on? Take off that human face if you can too - I was finally starting to feel something down there towards you
"What the hell is that sound... Sounds like..... someone being chased by a really fast horse-
[Loser Darling rushes past the two stranger out on a nightly stroll - heels clicking in the distance behind them]
Loser Darling: Oh, fuck- I wouldn't have ran if I knew that fucker could actually run in those things. How the fuck are his ankles so strong?
[Femboy Yan sprints after Darling, quickly gaining traction despite wearing heels thin enough to slit someone's neck]
Femboy Yan: Daaaarling~ I'm gonna catch you! You better run faster if you don't want me to - this is a normal Saturday run for me!
[Loser Darling screams as they run faster, tripping over their own feet as tears build up in their eyes.]
Loser Darling, sniffling: I FUCKING HATE IT HERE