Male Selfishness - Tumblr Posts
literally the VAST majority of women want men to be kind and caring and supportive and sweet and not have ulterior motives. that’s. why romance novels and romcoms are so fucking popular. before anything else. that is the fantasy.
and men don’t do it because they’re adamant that 1) being kind and caring and supportive and sweet without ulterior motives is unmanly and perhaps even gay and 2) women are inferior and perhaps not even human being so much as they are sex objects
and this is a social / cultural thing, not biological. there is no biological drive making men this way. it is our incredibly fucking misogynistic and patriarchal society, which is designed and upheld by men, and which benefits men.
so they keep doing it and whine about how it hurts them even though they continually refuse to acknowledge that in order to dismantle that they have to view women as human beings equal to men and in many cases be willing to lose opportunities to women who are better than them. and they will not do it.
“All this extra work is affecting women’s health. We have long known that women (in particular women under fifty-five) have worse outcomes than men following heart surgery. But it wasn’t until a Canadian study came out in 2016 that researchers were able to isolate women’s care burden as one of the factors behind this discrepancy. ‘We have noticed that women who have bypass surgery tend to go right back into their caregiver roles, while men were more likely to have someone to look after them,’ explained lead researcher Colleen Norris.
This observation may go some way to explaining why a Finnish study found that single women recovered better from heart attacks than married women – particularly when put alongside a University of Michigan study which found that husbands create an extra seven hours of housework a week for women. An Australian study similarly found that housework time is most equal by gender for single men and women; when women start to cohabit, ‘their housework time goes up while men’s goes down, regardless of their employment status’.”
- Caroline Criado-Pérez’s Invisible Women: Exposing Data Bias in a World Designed for Men
Whenever men make videos or posts, or (god forbid) a podcast, about issues or discrimination specifically faced by men, my response will always be one of nonchalance and zero concern usually punctuated with a casual “well fix it then.” I don’t argue and I don’t debate. Don’t like it? Fix it then.
And my response will remain such until men stop framing every single one of these conversations around what women can do better to support men and start framing these conversations around what men can do better to fix this problem.
Because ironically, every single one of these problems is caused and maintained by men. But men, do not want to take accountability for the world they have built and maintained and so they look to women to have this conversation and I’m just simply not going to have that conversation with you. Don’t like something? Talk to your homeboys and fix it. It’s above me.
No offense but if you didn’t make him nut you failed as a top
“Men’s indifference to learning about contraception and to taking any responsibility for it is a theme that emerges from many reports of projects that have attempted, and failed, to reach and educate men. One of the most successful programs of contraception education for men, a Planned Parenthood project in Chicago, abandoned its attempts to reach men over the age of twenty-five when it was found that these men simply would not participate… Instead, the project targeted a younger group, and as part of its research the project conducted a survey of over a thousand men aged fifteen to nineteen:These young men were asked whether they agreed with the statement “It’s okay to tell a girl you love her so that you can have sex with her.” Seven out of ten agreed that it’s okay.They were asked whether they agreed with the statement “A guy should use birth control whenever possible.” Eight out of ten disagreed and said a guy should not.And when asked, “If I got a girl pregnant, I would want her to have an abortion,” nearly nine out of ten said no, they would not want her to have an abortion.These teenage men agreed: Deception to obtain coital access is okay; male irresponsibility in contraception is okay; but abortion is not okay—“because it’s wrong.””
— John Stoltenberg, “The Fetus as Penis: Men’s Self-Interest and Abortion Rights” from Refusing to be a Man: Essays on Sex and Justice (via reading-blog)