Mingi Angst - Tumblr Posts

cold husband mafia mingi x reader where they get into an argument then the reader is kidnapped and gets hurt infront of him and falls unconscious give me all the angst you’ve got 🫶🏻

I AM LOST...

Pairing: Mafia husband! Mingi x Wife!reader

Genre: Angst, Mafia, Family au

W.C: 4.2k

Warnings: arguments b/w husband and wife, neglection of married life, mention open cuts with knife, kidnapping, get shot, blood loss. Regret.

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated . Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!

“Why don’t you understand?”

You angrily put down the phone on your bed and brushed back the loose hairs from your face. You know it’s not a certain thing for you to be in this situation but you didn’t expect that even today also, he was going to treat it as the usual day. You were not expecting much from him but at least he could have tried to appreciate your efforts for the night.

You glanced at the clock and looked down at your long-slit dress for the night hugging your body. Few moments back, your mirror reflected the beauty of the night with a bright smile adorning your look but now your face reflecting the sadness. Sadness or loneliness.

Throwing the heels to the side of the room, you picked up the night sleep-gown to get change into it. Taking the phone in your hand, you checked through the notifications for the last time for the day, there’s still no texts from him of changing his mind. So, you are just going to sleep without even eating the dinner. You have already texted the restaurant to cancel your booking for the night and paid extra charges for the arrangements before heading to the bathroom.

It’s been an hour that you have locked yourself inside the bathroom when you heard a faint knock. When you turned off the tap, you could hear the light banging at the door.

“Who is there?”

“Ma’am, Is everything okay? I was calling you for last ten minutes and sorry to enter the room without the permission but I was worried for you.”

Oh. You were zoning out and didn’t hear your name being called. You could hear the worriedness in your maid’s voice and she is the only one who knows to accompany you even when she is busy or having her special days. Atleast, she understands you and knows what you are going through in your life. You literally envy her as she is not rich like you but having a nice and moderate life where she is actually happy unlike you who don’t know about happiness after the marriage.

“Ma’am?”

“I’m okay. Just need some time alone and I’ll be fine.”

You heard a faint ‘okay’ and click of your bedroom door shut. You sighed and stared at the mirror for few minutes before heading outside the bathroom. Slow footsteps took you near the window where you could see the view of the busy streets of the city. Your one hand resting on the glass window looked like as if you are caged in the room, maybe you are, just the way you are restricted to this marriage.

When you heard your maid calling out your name again, you let her in but still facing the window. You have tried not to show your vulnerable state to her but everytime you failed and cried to her. She was always there to comfort you, even today as well.

“Are you crying?”

You glanced at your reflection to the side, you could see a tear-line down on your cheeks and your fingers raised up to feel it. To feel the pain of your silent scream.

“I don’t know but why am I even crying?”

The mother like figure setting the food on the corner table, made her way towards you. She sympathetically smiled at you and when she reached near you, patting your head and taking hold of your one hand, brought you to sit on the edge of the bed. You stared at the hold and silent tears fell on top of it.

 “Am I not worthy for his time?” you asked in a hushed voice.

She rubbed your palms and hummed, “It’s not about your worth my dear. He is just distant from everything. You know when I first came into this house to work, I thought he really hate me as his maid or he doesn’t like a particular thing about me which is why he is being so cold to me. But gradually I got to know him, he is just a man who grew up as a child neglected by the family and so he doesn’t know how to really express himself.”

“But I am his wife. Does he not care about this? If he didn’t want to marry then why making my life miserable.” You gulped the lump in your throat and inhaled the sob that could tear out any time. You just want a little time of his where you can spend some time like a couple and talk about our married life.

“I know, Y/N. It’s really hard for you but some things need time.”

“It’s been one year…” you looked at her and she nodded.

“I hope he would soon see how he is ignoring a beautiful soul like you. He really loves you though or he wouldn’t have done so much to keep you safe here. He is just scared to open up with you as his parents never listened to him so he thinks that you might behave like them as well. As it was a contract marriage so he thinks you are with his parents but trust me, his first priority is you.”

You chuckled bitterly, “Never. His first priority is this mafia business which would never let him to come closer to me. He is just doing everything because this is his house and his properties which are needed to be kept safe-“

“And you are my wife.”

Both of you turned towards the door to see the man in messed up condition standing at the doorway with his coat in one hand and placing the gun in the drawer of the table near the corner table.

The maid stood up and excused herself to leave the room, leaving you with Mingi. When passing him, she asked quietly if he had eaten but he just shook his head and told not to bring him dinner, everything inaudible to you.

His eyes look tired and hairs disheveled, lazily he threw the tie on the sofa and walked towards the mirror. Your eyes following his movements and when he caught you looking at him through the mirror, you didn’t look away but locked your eyes with his.

“Your wife?” a hatred filled undertone spilled from your mouth.

He waited to see if you wanted to say anything more but only tears flowing down your eyes. The only thought came across his mind was how he had messed up today, the very first anniversary of both of yours. The mission was important but he couldn’t suddenly let the enemies know that they have a hole of his absence and take advantage of his gang, as he is the main snipper of the Mafia ‘Ateez’.

“Yes.” His eyes glanced at the food kept covered at the corner table and sighed, “Eat your food. I had my dinner earlier and you should not sleep in empty stomach.”

“I would rather die than eating dinner.”

Your words somehow hit a nerve inside him as he skipped towards and made you stand up, gripping your shoulders tightly. “What did you just say?”

You tried to read him but you could only see fire eyes staring back at you. You glanced at the grip on the shoulders and saw few cuts on his knuckles and wrists, maybe the mission didn’t succeed. So what? He is now going to show his frustration on you?

“I can’t live like a stranger in this house even when I’m living with the person, I got married to last year. Have you ever considered our life in a serious way or it’s just a contract mission for you. You could have said before our marriage then I would have done something to prevent it. Why was it necessary to make my life miserable for your mafia business?”

You were shouting on his face and you could see his furrowed brows and piercing eyes searching for your every emotion. His grip on you loosened and you swatted his hands away from you.

“Y/n…”

“Stop it. I’m tired of listening to your same excuses.” You pushed your hairs back and continued, “This mission was important. I’m doing things which is good for us. Same words.”

Mingi exhaled and proceeded to remove the wrist watch.

“You know it’s not an easy thing to be the part of a gang member and also maintain the family. You need to understand some things. Don’t act childish and whine for little things.”

“little things? You are an emotionless monster, Mingi. Do you even care about other’s feelings?” You rubbed your eyes with your sleeves, “I tried to understand your situation before. Everytime whenever I got disappointed with your attitude, I tried to convince myself that everything would be okay once the missions get over. But never.”

“This is my life, Y/n.”

“and what about my life? Before the marriage I dreamt of getting a husband who would be caring and loving to me. I never wanted money or a luxurious life to show off people but I wanted someone who will stay with me, understand me. Mingi please, I’m tired of all these.”

He stayed silent.

“I’m really a monster. Don’t forget I’m a member of ‘Ateez’ so I should not have feelings for anything and of course, I can’t be available like the other husbands. I gave you everything. I bought you all the things you have ever wanted, I have taken you to all the places you have wanted to visit and still here you are complaining about your life.” He has never shouted at you and today the way he raised his voice has reached the limit.

“Mingi……I need love.” You whispered the words. You just want to disappear from this place at that moment. He has heard what you had said and he stopped in his track entering the bathroom.

“Y/n, why can’t you understand that-“

“STOP! I am fed up with this. I’m leaving this place right now. Don’t try to find me unless you know how to become a husband.”

You grabbed your phone and purse laying on the sofa and slide the jacket hanging on the hook and slammed shut the door. Mingi stared at the door through which just now you have exited. A tear drop fell from the eye. Not your, but his. He is crying. He brings his finger to feel the tears on his cheeks. He deserves it.

“I’m sorry….”

He threw the towel on the bed and quickly dialled a number and waited impatiently for the other line to pick it up. 

“Hello? Is anything wrong?”

“Yunho, please track Y/n’s number and see where she is going. I know she must be going to her best friend’s house but she was restless when she left the house so I hope she doesn’t do anything stupid and go to her house safely.”

“Mingi, calm down. I will keep a watch on her. And, you still didn’t apologize right? She needs you, Mingi. You are her husband and you know she is not used to this kind of dark life yet her parents forced her into this but you need to remember, she is that bubbly Y/n from our class and she deserves happiness. I hope after she comes back to you, you treat her the right way. Right way I meant, you will give her all the love she needs and deserves.”

“I know… please keep a watch on her.”

“I will.”

After hanging up the call, he stared at the phone screen and unconsciously, he tapped on your name to call you but his finger hovered over the call sign and sighed. You wouldn’t pick up and he made a mental note to bring you back.

After a while when he exited the bathroom, he glanced at the bed. Usually, he would find you sleeping or scrolling through the phone. Your food still kept in the corner, getting cold just like the relationship between you both. It would not be a surprise if you leave him at this point because it would be all his fault after all. It’s surprising how you are a carefree, bubbly and a sunshine girl got entangled with confined, ruthless and cold boy.

He has always watched you since the middle school and he envied how cheerful you always were unlike him, who had to hide the mafia family business and always acting cold towards everyone. Never in a while, he thought that he would be marrying you in the future and now here you are both struggling in your life. And moreover, he is the one destroying your butterflies and rainbows with the thunderstorm of his coldness.

The bedroom door slammed open and the maid supported herself at the doorframe and spoke between the heavy breathes, “Sir Yunho is here. He is calling you urgently.”

Mingi threw the towel on the bed and signalled her to go along with him. Meanwhile, he asked her if she knows the reason for his urgency but the words came out her mouth made his heart beat stop for a moment.

“It’s about Y/n.”

He inhaled sharply before almost running to the living room where Yunho was sitting in a messed up state and looking at the phone screen. Mingi took large steps towards the man sitting on the sofa and grabbed his collar to make him stand.

“where is Y/n? I told you to keep a watch on her then what went wrong?”

Yunho held the wrist and tried to calm him down but he himself was sick worried of the thing that happened earlier.

“Mingi, I was tracking her location as you told me but suddenly, she changed her direction to a different road and I quickly went there with Jongho as it was the way leading to the highway where all the deals happen at night.”

“Why was she going there?”

“I didn’t know why she suddenly went there but when I reached her last location, she was not there and I found her phone lying at the side of the road and I saw a number texted her to go there who pretended as you. She trusted the text that you were asking her to meet and you would be apologizing for everything. We need to do something.”

Mingi didn’t know what to think at the moment. Should he scold you for believing any number to be him? Or should he just shoot everyone here and there just to find you quickly? He brushed the damp hairs back and took heavy breathes to calm him down to come up with a better plan as panicking is not a mafia thing and he needs to think wisely so that you don’t get hurt.

Yunho got a call from one of his gang members and conversing over the call, he turned towards his other mate. He watched how he was being so impatient for his wife. Even if he doesn’t show any feelings but deep down, he loves his wife the most. He is just scared not to harm her in the flow of his mafia life. He wants to keep you as bubbly as the childhood Y/n but he is hurting you in the process.

“Hey.” Mingi looked up to his member’s call. “Jongho has tracked the message number id and it’s from the District-9 and it only means there is one person who could have kidnapped her. It’s Bangchan and his gang members to take revenge for the last month’s mission.”

“I will go there and take her back. I need to leave right now.”

“Are you stupid? If he attacks you then neither you are getting her back nor you will be safe.”

“You don’t tell me what to do now. I don’t care to spend time coming up with a plan. Y/n is in danger and she is scared.”

Even when Yunho tried to stop him, Mingi harshly pushed him away and sprint towards the garage to get into his black car. His black outfit blending with the cold dark night. Even the roads through which he was driving through were silent but he was in chaos. Many thoughts passing through his mind and he was just praying that you were safe.

“Please wait for a while…I’m coming, Y/n.”

He drove the car faster.

.

.

.

“Well my little angel, is the cut burning?”

Your teary eyes looked up to the voice who was calling you with an endearment but mocking at you. The leader of this new gang and you just know only his name, Bangchan as others were just calling each other with code numbers.

“Please…I want to go home…It’s hurting please…” you tried to pry yourself off from the ropes binding you to the chair but your weak body couldn’t go against it and the cuts over your hands and legs were burning with your every little movement.

“It would have been easy if you would have told me the details of your husband’s base but your stubbornness is only causing you pain so my boys had to torture you like this. So, are you willing to speak now?”

He gripped your jaw harshly and brought his face near to yours. You shook your head to avoid him but he held you tighter.

“TELL ME!”

“I don’t know…”

“I swear-“ Before he could finish both of you hear loud screaming and shootings outside. He stared at you and held the gun towards you when he heard footsteps nearing the basement.

Within the seconds, the door kicked open by Mingi. At first, he didn’t notice you but when his gaze fell on Bangchan, the latter smirked and looked below when he followed the gaze, he watched how helpless and tiredly you were tied to the chair.

what the fuck…

“So, the snipper of Ateez is here without the invitation. Oh, wife pulled you here but as far as I have heard, it doesn’t really matter to you what’s going to happen to her.”

“Shut up.” He hissed.

Mingi took one step and you screamed in pain. It pierced his ears and heart at the same time. He is used to your laugh, your smile, your shouts, your complains but your scream in pain is not the thing he ever wanted to hear. It’s too painful for him. Maybe, because he is the snipper so he is not used to hear anyone’s pain from so close. No, its because it’s you who is screaming.

“Take one more step. You will see more fresh new cuts.”

His eyes scanned your whole body, Your sleeves and edges of the dress had patches of blood. Earlier in hurry, you changed into this light peach colour dress but he didn’t expect it to be covered in dirt and blood later the night.

“You wouldn’t dare.”

“Watch me.” He again cut open a line of skin on your forearm. Your scream again filled the room, deafening every other sound to his ears. Mingi balled his fist and gritted his teeth.

You haven’t asked for his help. Why? It’s because you don’t trust him or you still couldn’t believe that he was there to save you not for his mafia business.

“Mingi…please help me…”

That was the only push he needed to run towards the leader and punched him. This caused Bangchan to lose his grip on the knife and gun. He wiped off the blood from the corner of his lip and glared towards Mingi and the latter again punched him on the floor. Satisfied, he crawled towards your chair and starts to untie the ropes and chain. You were trying to stay awake but the blood loss was making it hard. Prying everything off from you, he hugged your weak body and rubbed your back.

“It’s okay, Y/n. Don’t be scared. I’m here.”

You didn’t reply but you were focusing on something, rather someone. Bangchan was pointing his gun towards Mingi’s back and when you realized, your eyes went big and you managed to switch the sides and as soon as your back facing the leader, he shot the bullet.

Who got shot?

You.

You leaned towards Mingi and held his biceps tighter. The pain was much worse than the previous cuts but somewhere you were feeling a relief that finally you would be at peace.

Bangchan ran away from the basement but that didn’t matter to the man who was in shocked to see you dying in his arms.

No. he can’t just let you die like this. He needs to apologize. He needs to make up for all the mistakes he has done.

He carried you to his car and Yunho followed him. Earlier four Ateez members followed Mingi and they helped him to attack on the District-9 basement.

“I will drive. Keep her awake until we reach hospital.”

Getting inside the car, he was calling out your name frantically and you have never seen him like this. For you.

“I want to sleep.”

“No no please. You will sleep but for a while please hold on. Don’t close your eyes please. Stay with me Y/n…”

Your cold hand reached to his cheeks and rubbed the rough skin.

“Are you crying for me? Am I being a bad wife?”

“No. you are the best wife ever someone wanted. It was me who was bad for neglecting you. Please stay with me…”

“I love you, Mingi.”

You closed your eyes and your breathing almost became faint. Mingi panicked at the situation but when Yunho pulled the car in front of the hospital. Without wasting any time, he skipped towards the emergency room with you in his arms. Of course, this was their personal Mafia Base Hospital and no one would dare to stop him.

Its been an hour when the doctor came out the room informed Mingi that you were in a critical situation as the bullet has damaged some area around it and your blood loss adding the worst possibilities to it. He was on the verge of losing control but after Yunho’s request, they let him to meet you.

You were sleeping peacefully. You wanted to sleep and now you are sleeping. He chuckled bitterly to this thought. He sat on the stool by the side of your bed and held your weak palm between his shaking ones.

“I’m sorry…”

Tears fell on the hold. Your breathings were very faint but as far as he could hear the sound, it was a little relief to him.

“I was scared, Y/n. I have seen you since the middle school and you were always the bright sunshine and I was the dark coldness. We never matched with each other but yet you smiled towards me.”

He sobbed before continuing, “When I got to know that you will be my wife. I had two feelings, one to be scared like how to take care of a family apart from the mafia life and the second, I was happy for the first time that I’m getting someone like you in my life. If the marriage was not important then I would have tried my best to keep you far away from someone like me, never to get involved with me.”

He paused for a moment to stare at you. Your beautiful face covered with cuts and now having antiseptic creams on them but he could feel the burning pain you had went through before. He caressed the side of your face and head. Smiling a little. Hoping for you to wake up and hug him and forgive him. He knows he doesn’t deserve the forgiveness so soon but just wants to see your lively face and smile once again. He needed to prove you his love and he swear he would do anything for you to see happy and not to be in this situation again. NEVER AGAIN.

“You are a treasure in my life whom I tried to protect so hard that the pressure broke it in the end. I destroyed you with my own hands. You are my queen but I caged you like a prisoner. Please wake up, Y/N. I can’t live without you. All these years, I have watched you from afar but when you are near, I am lost.”

He waited for you as if you are going to reply him back like other times. He wants you to shout at him, hit him, do whatever to make him realize your worth but he couldn’t afford to see you sleeping on a hospital bed, supported by some machines. Every drop of blood is precious than the most expensive ruby to him.

“I’m lost with you. I’m lost without you. For you I’m lost. I love you, Y/n. You are the only warmth in my cold life.”

‘I love you, Mingi.’ This was the last thing he heard faintly from you and your voice echoing inside his head.

“Please, don’t leave me. I want to change myself for you.” He planted a soft kiss on the back of your hand and tears falling from his eyes continuously.

You need to wake up or his coldness will make him lost in the void from where no one can ever bring him back. You are his first love and you can’t be the first reason to hate love.

I hope you liked it anon <3. I was really down while writing it coz about that post who insulted me for writing ffs so If the fic is not how you wanted then please wait for other fics, I will surely try to do better.

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades [open!]

can I request a mafia ot8 x reader? where they all kept a secret from her which made her feel betrayed like she wasn’t a part of the team so like she reverted back to her old self (cold, not talking to them at all, being strictly profesional) and each one of them regrets it

CAN WE GO BACK?

Pairing: Mafia! Ateez x f!reader

Genre: Angst, Mafia, Mature

W.C: 4.2k

Warnings: arguments, regret, trust issues, keeping secrets, mention of death and mafia business and deals, traumas and betrayals.

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Note: Thanks for reading and reblogging. I appreciate all of your reviews and feel free to text me if you want. Spread love to others, not hate. I swear if I write one more angst fic then I will end up crying a river. I have made this fic a little bit less angst and let me know how it is.

"Where are they?" You asked Mr. Na with balancing the snacks in your hold.

He looked at you with a frown and glanced at the papers. It was afternoon and you thought to meet your boyfriends in the office but they were not there. It's unusual for them to not be there without telling you where they are going to.

You pout and placed the snacks on the table and munched on one of your favorites. You waited for him to reply but he seemed to return back to his work. "Hey! I asked you something and you are ignoring me. You know who I am right?" You asked him in a threatening tone and he was still not fazed by you.

"I can't hear you. I'm busy." He didn't look up from his paper-works and you got mad.

You slammed your hand on the table in front of him and glared at him. He rolled his eyes with a bored look on his face.

"How will I know where  are they? And also didn't you have a mission this morning? Why are you back so early and annoying me?"

"Me annoying you. I would never." You faked a hurt look on your face and acted to have a heart attack. "I had my missions and I did well. I was really disappointed that those shitheads were not afraid of me at first but were insulting me more. So instead of letting to have them taste of my precious words, I planted some bullets in their head."

He chuckled, "as expected from you."

"But don't you really know where they are...they are not even picking up my calls." You looked down at your phone, still no missed calls or any messages.

"How will I know about it? You are their girlfriend and if they are keeping something so confidential to them, it can only meant that it's to remain within the family and as you are also part of the family so I hope they won't tell me anything about it." He said and went back to his work.

You are their family.

"But they didn't told you anything like if I return or something and where to find them?"

He glared, "no. But they were pretty much in hurry when they left the place and I thought you knew about it. So don't ask me again."

"Jaemin-" "Don't call me by my name during working hours."

You scoffed, "just now you told me that I'm their girlfriend and now you are raising your voice at me. Also, mafia business is for 24/7 so I can call you anything anytime and anywhere."

Jaemin clicked on a website and replied, " it was good when you were of cold personality and kept your distance with everyone. It's pretty much annoying that you always pick me to disturb and interrupt my works."

"Oh come on Jaemin, you love me too much. And just remember if I return back to that self, it will be only when something like in the past has hurt me again. And I really don't want to be like that again. I like being so happy and free everytime."

You were sad and your words were pronounced clearly that made him understand that he should not have said those harsh words to you. He knew how pathetic and vulnerable your past was but still his work load and you in between made him slip those words.

He patted your head, "y/n, I'm sorry. Really. I didn't mean like that. I really love to see you so bubbly. They have totally changed you and to see you happy with them is really the best thing in this building."

"You still don't trust me?"

"No no you are the lovely and the best sister I have got here and please don't mind my words like this. Please don't feel sad."

He was really trying his best to hold back his tears and make you trust him that the little suspicion he had back then when you joined the company had disappeared eventually. He always thought of you as the distraction in their life but now he sees you as a blessing. He is a best brother to you.

"Never. I can't feel sad with you atleast. You are not getting rid of me anytime soon."

A ring from Jaemin's phone interrupted your conversation with him, you both watched the name displayed on the screen 'Sir Yunho'. His eyes went wide and stared at the phone and you clutched yours in the hold.

You urged him to pick it up and put it on speaker. He received the call and you leaned forward to scan the drafts on the computer screen on which he was working.

"Has Y/n returned yet?" The voice from the other end was rough and tired.

"She-" you pressed a finger on your lips and signalled him to not tell them about your arrival. "No she hasn't returned yet, let me ask her."

"No let her be. We will be back soon from the business. If she returns then tell her we are out for lunch." He spoke in a hurry.

The call was passed to someone else. Jaemin was surprised that they just told to not tell you that they were out somewhere and even told him to lie to you. He was watching you how you were staring blankly at your phone.

"Jaemin, what happened?" Hongjoong was angry but still he was trying to contain his anger. The younger boy was distracted and soon collected himself to reply back.

"Oh just, some works are pending so I got distracted."

"okay."

The call was cut and you stood up. He was about to say something to you but you raised your hand making him shut and you turned towards the meeting room. The room which belongs to you too but now somehow it felt many secrets are hidden behind it, from you.

he watched you walking towards the room with lost eyes and tired form. He shook his head at the thought that it was not good whatever was going to happen because it's not a good decision for them to keep this sudden business hidden from you.

Where were they even? Why didn't they tell you about it?

These thoughts were storming inside your mind after you entered the room. Your fingers curled into a fist and threw the vase which was placed on top of the side shelf above which a beautiful family picture with you smiling with your boyfriends were hanging. You glared at the picture.

"Where are you all? Don't you all trust me that you had to keep this sudden business as a secret from me?"

You harshly wiped away the tears from your eyes and looked around the room. It was same as earlier when  you noticed before leaving in the morning. You slowly walked towards the leader's chair at the end of the table. 

You sat on it and held the armrest tightly. You turned it around to face the wall behind you. The letters on the wall were piercing your eyes which were designed with orange and black LED mini lights, 'ATEEZ'.

Your family.

"Don't you all trust me as your family?"

The more you were thinking about the situation, the more you felt like convincing yourself that you were just overreacting and after they come back from the place, they will tell you the truth and everything related to it but still somewhere you were impatient.

They know that keeping secrets only triggers you but still they chose to do it.

. . .

"Is she here?" Jongho's voice made Jaemin look up from the computer screen.

Jaemin stood up and greeted him and the rest who were chit chatting in the back. "Y-yeah, she just returned right now."

Jongho smiled and said, "you don't have to work on this today. We need this after two weeks so go have some free time with your friends. Don't stress yourself."

Jaemin nodded and sat down.

"Let's head to the meeting room first and she must be waiting for us in the cafeteria." Yeosang's cheerful voice made everyone laugh and there was a warm feeling in their hearts that you were waiting for them.

Jaemin's eyes followed them going to the same direction where you went earlier. Heavy boots clicked the marble floor with dark looks radiating from them but everyone had a small smile resting on their face because of the thought of you.

Seonghwa opened the heavy metal door only to be greeted by broken pieces of fiber scattered on the floors and then he noticed the vase in front of their picture was lying broken.

"Who the hell did this?" Hongjoong's angry voice brought the others attention to the situation.

"Welcome back, Ateez."

Their eyes followed the source of the voice and noticed the leader's chair facing backward to the table. They couldn't see the person sitting on it due to the high rise of the leather of the backrest but the voice was pretty much familiar, the one they crave to listen often, almost every time.

You swiveled around the chair to face them and they noticed you sitting on it with one leg over the another and staring at your phone.

San was last to enter the meeting room and when he closed the door behind him, he noticed the whole situation and the destruction on the floor.

"You look cute when you sit on this chair."

You ignored Hongjoong's compliment and he was surprised that you didn't reply him back. If it was some other time then you would have teased him or said that you always look better than him and then he would have placed you on his lap and proceed with things.

"How did your mission go?" You glared when San went to touch your cheek after asking the question. He thought you were joking so he again raised his hand only to get swatted away by you.

"Sir San, please keep your hands off from me. You should not touch me like this way."

He laughed, " are you putting up a new act again from a movie?"

"Hey let's get some food in the cafeteria." Yeosang said and smiled towards you while approaching you.

You gave both of them a stern look before staring at the man standing across from you in the far end of the table. He was watching you intently.

Hongjoong leaned forward and supported his hands on the edge of the table, "why are you speaking like this? What's with your behavior with them?"

"How does it feel to be the leader and sitting here? Very authentic, right leader?"

Leader...you don't call him this anymore because after the day they turned you into this new personality, you always call them by their name just to feel them more closer. It makes you feel a family with them.

"Why are you asking this all of a sudden?" Seonghwa behind him asked you and you fished your phone inside your pocket of the combat pants and poked the inside of your cheek.

"Why don't you all take a seat? We need to discuss something about business." 

Your words were like a business partner waiting for them to make a deal not their girlfriend who was waiting for their return.

No one budged from their place and you rolled your eyes. You stood up but stayed beside the chair and spin it around. Their eyes followed your movements.

"I thought sitting here will make me the leader but I see that's not the case here."

Wooyoung sat in the second chair at the side of the table.

"Where were you all?" You asked.

Jongho scanned the room to see all of them were busy staring at you and so he said, "we were out for lunch." He nodded in the end.

You bitterly chuckled, "from nine in the morning to this later afternoon...almost four o'clock...you all were out for so long. Just for lunch?"

"We were not out for so long." Hongjoong said confidently.

"Of course. But that's not according to my watch."

"Why the vase is broken?" You smirked at Seonghwa's question.

"Ah finally the question I wanted.well, I broke it."

"Why?"

"And if I ask you the same question Seonghwa, why?"

Mingi interjected, "what do you mean by why?"

San was still standing confused beside the chair on the other side.

"I am asking you all again and for the last time. Where were you all?" Your words were so loud and this sudden yell made some of them surprised and others were still staring at you.

Mingi was quick to reply, "as he said we were out for lunch."

"Don't lie to me. If you don't want to tell the truth then shut up." You clenched your jaw.

"What makes you think like that?" Yunho asked and folded his hands above his chest.

"Oh come on Yunho, you told Jaemin to lie to me that you were out for lunch when you were actually on a secret business. Am I right?"

He was surprised that you knew about it. Wooyoung leaned back to his chair and said, "y/n, it's not like that. That's just a simple issue."

"Then why can't anyone of you tell me where you all were."

Jongho cleared his throat and said, "it's better for you to not know about it."

"Do you think of me as a spy?"

"Y/n no we can't ever think of you like that. Even if you did something wrong then we can always talk it out with each other but we will never suspect you for anything." Jongho quickly stated.

Hongjoong's boot echoed in the room and he stood in front of you. You glared at him when he placed his hand on your shoulder.

"Don't try to manipulate me or try to convince me to trust your lies. You promised me to never hide anything from me but suddenly you all are hiding something from me."

He nodded, "I know but I want you to calm down for me. Please." You scoffed. Another presence made an appearance beside you both but you were yet to notice it but when he spoke up you became more annoyed with the same words.

You pushed away the hand from your shoulder.

"Not always everything can be said to everyone. Sometimes its better to keep some things secret."Seonghwa said and held your hands in his and caressed them a little, "it's for your safety and well being."

He seemed to be calm and contented but deep down he was deeply hurt to see you acting distant with him and not even smiling a bit when he was so near to you. He was holding your hand but he wanted to pull you in a hug.

"We just want to keep you safe, y/n." Yunho stated very slowly and he was sad.

He is always the first person to pull you in a hug and fill you with love and praises and today he would have appreciated you for your success and instead of this dark environment, the room would have filled with laughter when he would have held you up and spin you around in the room.

Mingi stood behind you and prevented you to move away and whispered words to calm you down and to take everything slowly. But you were not in a mood. He was still process the fact that you came to know about the secret business.

You pulled your hands harshly from the grip and shouted which made the person behind you to stumble backward.

"Can you all stop pretending that you all did nothing wrong? If I'm overthinking then let me be like this but you know I hate when my own family hide something from me. It make me feels like I am not trusted. It reminds me of my past."

Wooyoung hesitated to speak anything but still clenched his fist, "no love, we trust you the most. Believe me."

You ignored his words and sat on the chair beside him. Seonghwa was about to say something but Hongjoong held his hand up to make him quiet. The past traumas always triggered you whenever someone lied to you or hide something from you but still he did it.

Rest of them were aware of this situation too. Your words were feeling so distant and you being so hyper was normal for you to act this way. Atleast they should have think about this situation before. You held your head over the table and grabbed your hairs and Wooyoung stared at you with hurtful eyes.

You looked like that old y/n who was with cold heart, piercing eyes and distant space with them. Not their usual y/n with the warm heart, sweet smile and confidence.

Hongjoong was about to pass by you to go towards his chair when he halted in his steps behind you, he raised his hands to pat your head but the younger one beside you grabbed it and glared at him.

"I told you to tell her about the situation but still you were persistent with your decision. Look what you have done." Wooyoung didn't mind to raise his voice at his brother but the leader just nodded to his words and retreated his hand back.

He went to his seat and signaled others to do the same. They all were glancing at you. You were near the leader and San who was across from you was glancing between you and the leader.

He wanted to just pull you towards him and take you away somewhere else just to calm you down and make you feel loved.

When you noticed everyone was seated, you raised your head and blankly asked, "I assume you all to start speaking now. And only the truth."

"We were with your dad and Mr. Lee." Hongjoong started the conversation.

"Don't ever refer that monster as my dad. He is no one to me."

"Mr. Lee's daughter..." he paused and looked around for anyone else to continue and Yunho nodded.

Yunho smiled but quickly erased it when he saw your fuming eyes, "his daughter is engaged to Hongjoong and Seonghwa because once we had a deal in the past to save our organization and today we were there to break the dealership with him."

When the topic finally started. each one of them had a same feelings tugging at their heart. the feeling of regrets. All of them were regretting to keep you oblivion to this.

You scoffed, "engaged?" your eyes took in each of their looks precisely and continued, "so its not about only today. you all were hiding it from me for a long time now. and for how long?"

"it's not like that."

"Yunho, I asked you for how long you all were preparing for this business and when all this engagement happened?" you asked and leaned back into your chair. Mingi was impatiently tapping the top of the table with the back of the pen.

Seonghwa patted Yunho's back  when he was on the verge of tears hearing your harsh and cold tone. he gulped and started to reply but his lost eyes were staring at you and you were not even minding his presence and Mingi chimed in, "last year. your da- I mean Mr. Byun offered this deal so that we could recover from the loss we had in the last year."

Yeosang added, "we thought to not worry you about this whole ordeal and we could have solved it without including you and then pretend that we were never in this situation."

"we always wanted the best for you. please don't feel sad." Wooyound said slowly beside you and you rolled your eyes.

"So I have been lied for one whole year. you made my only chance to go in vain. why? you thought I will be a problem  in this?" you turned towards the leader "were you planning to get married? why did you have to hide this whole thing?"

Jongho was curious, "what only chance you are talking about?"

you smirked at him, "I could have showed Mr. Byun that I have a family which he never gave me. I could have showed him how powerful I am. I am not the weak one he wanted me to be. I could have proved that I am being loved and trusted as a family." You paused and scoffed, “but I think I was delusional all these times.”

Hongjoong clenched his fist on hearing your words and sighed, "Wooyoung and Yunho wanted to tell you about this but I told them and others to keep this discussion away from you. I didn't want to include you because-"

"because you dont trust me. you thought I will support Mr. Byun when you all were crashing to the ground?"

San quickly denied, "no no. we trust you so much y/n. we thought hearing his name or facing him would have hurt you."

Hongjoong nodded and continued, "it would have been more dramatic if people came to know about your relation with Mr. Byun and that you are a part of us inspite of him being our enemy."

"you see me as your enemy?"

"what? no." wooyoung shouted those words at you.

Seonghwa stated quietly, "I'm sorry. I should not have hide these things from you. you should have been told about this earlier. it's really worse for you to find it like this. but trust me we were scared. how to protect you and maintain our organization."

"you made me feel like an outsider."

"I know we did it in that way." Mingi said and looked down.

"After this I can't trust anyone of you like before. Every time now I would feel like you guys are hiding something from me. I will feel like I am somehow related to your enemy and still like before you have the suspicion of me going against you someday."

you paused and inhaled sharply, "I don't know if you guys trust me or not but I have always trusted you more than everything. I trusted you all and whatever you did was to keep me safe and away from this to not hurt me but...atleast you should have let me know about it. My trust would not have broken like this."

Yunho stood up and walked towards you, he turned around your chair and kneeled down, "please Y/n, please we won't hide anything again from you. please talk to me but don't distance yourself from us."

"you gave me no other option. they were engaged all these times, you all met Mr. Byun often and made deals behind my back without even letting me to get a hint of it. I was blinded by the trust that I never noticed you all were lying to me all these times when you were actually going out not to hangout but to meet that monster and this new girl."

You were blinded by the trust that you never noticed they were lying to you.

Wooyoung hugged you from behind, "We only love you. you are everything to me. I never wanted to lie to you but this was the only option. please forget about this and lets go back to normal."

you removed both of their hands from you and stood up. everyone was attentive to your movements. you glanced at the clock and sighed. you were tired and hungry and frustrated. All at the same time and you felt a wave of anger rising inside you.

"you are not leaving us, right?"

"Jongho if I leave right now then where is the thing called 'we can talk out our problems' but yeah that's true that you have made me feel lose my trust on you all."

you paused and then added, "Are you two still engaged with her?"

"yes." both of them quickly replied.

"get rid of her quickly or I will get rid of her from this world."

Both of them nodded.

they all gulped hearing your words and Yeosang grabbed your hand when you stepped forward for the door. you eyed his hand, waited for him to say whatever he wanted but you didn't look in his eyes. you knew if you look at him, you might start crying but you needed some time to recover from this whole situation. 

"I'm sorry."

you knew he was sorry but still you were having so many thoughts that you couldn't still place things right on the places. once your trust is broken, it can't be mended so easily and they knew this. each of them were regretting.

"do you trust me?" your words were meant for all and he nodded quickly. you rolled your eyes and licked your lips.

"the ones who trust me, please follow me to the research room, I have kept the pen drive and file there so I can show you the details of it."

"Will you not eat?" San asked you quietly.

"I am not hungry. Finish the research room process with me and then I need to...I will have some time alone."

you glared towards Hongjoong and Seonghwa and left the room, slamming the door shut behind you. They didn't say anything. after all, it was their fault and you felt betrayed with them hiding things from you for one whole year. Mingi was the next one to leave room to quickly follow you and others sighed.

They need to start to build the trust from the beginning. You wanted to hate them but your trust and love for them was too much to hate them. To forget them as your family.

You smiled towards him and pecked him.

you once said, "how can I trust you?"

he smiled and hugged you, "your enemy is my enemy. our enemy and there is nothing that can come between us to tear us apart. you are the precious and the knot of this family. if someone hurts you, we all will be hurt and get scattered."

“We will never lie to you and there will be no secret between us.”

Was that all a lie then?

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn [open!]

tortured myself reading this, oh it’s too good😭 leave me as I find a corner to cry in😔😭

🌏⌇atlas┆song mingi

│part of goes to waste the series based on my favourite keshi songs

│listen here

rapper!mingi x non-celebrity!reader

│synopsis: in the heart of bustling seoul, you and mingi shared a luxurious penthouse apartment. despite the grandeur, loneliness consumed you as mingi's skyrocketing fame distanced him from the loving boyfriend you once knew.

│genre: lovers to strangers, angst

│trigger warnings:  heartbreak (obviously), mature language, mention of past trauma and pain

│words: 8.9 k

│playlist: empty box an album by song mingi, tracklist: after hours, too late, killing me (english), wait, paranoid, drunk, lonely heart, empty box (english)

│reminder: what you’re about to read is purely fiction, so let’s keep it separate from reality.

!minors do not interact!

— hi there! finally, here's the next part of goes to waste series. i had to take some time off after publishing 2soon (check it if you haven't yet), which was a truly personal piece, but now i'm back! atlas is very loosely inspired by the song; it's more about the vibe the song gave me than the actual lyrics. i also changed the original synopsis quite a bit because i honestly didn't feel like sticking with the first version. same as with 2soon, i spent some time creating a playlist, and if you do decide to listen, i hope you enjoy the songs i've chosen. oh! and if you read through my small author notes, then you're lucky because i can finally reveal that both the reaper (jongho) and right here (yeosang) will be published as a mini-series (but only after finishing finding our way back)!

love, monika ♡

i’d be so grateful for a little love – a tagged reblog or comment would truly make my day!

│taglist: @skittyneos │@kyeos4ng │ @vcutparis │@hoeforalbedo

You were sitting on a bed in the bedroom you shared with Mingi in your very own luxurious penthouse apartment in the bustling center of Seoul. It hasn't been long since you moved in here, but the vastness and elegance of the place made you feel even lonelier than ever. Mingi was out, performing at a sold-out arena show, and the glaring reality was that you weren't there to support him. It wasn't that you didn't want to attend; the painful truth was that he simply forgot to invite you—his girlfriend of the last 4 years, someone who had stood by his side through thick and thin. You looked at the floor, your eyes catching the sight of your suitcases and bags packed meticulously with your belongings, ready to move out of this once cherished home. The thing was, you couldn't quite leave without seeing Mingi one last time. Your heart ached at the thought of parting without a final goodbye, and it didn't let you go. You didn't know life without Mingi, and the prospect left you shit scared. The very thought of navigating through your days without his presence was enough to send shivers down your spine. However, you couldn't pretend any longer that Mingi hasn't changed. The boy you once fell in love with, who was caring, attentive, and always made you feel like the center of his universe, seemed to have vanished. In his place was someone distant, preoccupied, and seemingly indifferent to your feelings. You tried to rationalize his behavior, blaming it on the stress of his career and the constant pressure he was under, but deep down, you knew it was more than that. The connection you once shared felt like a distant memory, and the reality of who he had become was impossible to ignore. 

It all started not even a year ago. Mingi's song went viral on the internet, and he gained a massive following in a span of three days. From being an independent artist playing in clubs for maybe a couple of hundred fans, he went straight to signing a contract with a major company, making huge checks and selling out arenas in a span of minutes. The transformation was almost surreal. One day, you were cheering him on from small, dimly lit venues where you could see the sweat on his brow and the fire in his eyes as he performed. The next, he was being whisked away to luxurious studios and high-profile meetings with industry moguls. It felt like you were living in a dream—or a nightmare, depending on the moment. Suddenly, the simplicity of your shared life was replaced by a whirlwind of glitz and glamour. Mingi's phone never stopped buzzing with calls, texts, and notifications. Invitations to exclusive parties, collaborations with big names, and interviews with top media outlets flooded in. While his career skyrocketed, your relationship seemed to plummet into an abyss of neglect and misunderstanding. As he became more entrenched in his new world, you noticed changes in him. The boy who once couldn't wait to spend a quiet night in, watching movies with you was now constantly on the go, his calendar filled with events that didn't include you. The intimate conversations you used to have, were replaced by strained, hurried phone calls and text messages that felt more like obligations than genuine connections. Despite your best efforts to be supportive and understanding, the growing distance between you became an insurmountable chasm. Mingi's success had come at a steep price, and it felt like you were the one paying for it. The man you had known and loved for years was slowly slipping away, replaced by someone who seemed more like a stranger with each passing day. 

The night was getting later, and there was still no sign of Mingi. Maybe he wasn't planning to come back today; maybe he was too busy with his new rapper friends to even care to come back. You couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment and frustration. You glanced at your phone, hoping for a message or a missed call, but there was nothing. Well, it wouldn't be the first time he had left you waiting, feeling like an afterthought in his increasingly busy life. You tried to occupy yourself, turning on the TV and flipping through channels, but nothing could distract you. The boy who once couldn't stand to be away from you was now someone who seemed to have forgotten you existed.  

With every passing minute, the reality of your situation became clearer. Mingi might not come back tonight, tomorrow, or even the day after that. He was out there, living his life, while you were stuck in a place that no longer felt like home. You still vividly remember your first day in this apartment; it was a momentous occasion. Mingi had received his significant check from the tour ticket sales, as well as the royalties, just a week passed since, and you were moving into the luxurious space. The excitement and anticipation were palpable as you both looked forward to starting this new chapter in your lives together. You left your one-bedroom apartment with a tingle of sadness, each corner filled with cherished memories of the life you had built together. However, the excitement and anticipation of creating a new home in a spacious, luxurious penthouse overshadowed any melancholy you felt. You both dreamed of this moment, envisioning a future filled with endless possibilities and new adventures. The thought of decorating the new place, hosting friends, and building new memories brought a sense of joy and hope. It was a new chapter, a fresh start, and despite the nostalgia for your old apartment, the promise of what lay ahead made the transition feel like the beginning of something wonderful. So, you never thought you would be leaving this place like this. Heartbroken. The walls that once echoed with laughter and joy now felt cold and distant. Every corner of the penthouse, which had been a symbol of Mingi’s dreams and aspirations, now seemed to mock your pain. The spacious rooms that once brought a sense of freedom now felt like a labyrinth of sorrow. You recalled the countless evenings spent planning your future together, the whispered promises of forever, and the dreams you had woven into the very fabric of this home. Now, those dreams lay shattered, scattered like fragile pieces of glass. The weight of your decision to leave pressed heavily on your chest, making it difficult to breathe. You never imagined that the place which once brought you so much happiness would be the same place you'd have to walk away from. 

You promised yourself you wouldn't wait longer than 3 AM, and as the hour approached, you picked up all your belongings and took them to the hallway. Each step felt heavier than the last, the weight of your decision sinking in deeper with every passing second. You glanced once again across the apartment, taking in the memories etched into every corner of the space that once felt like a loving home. With a heavy heart, you left your keys on the kitchen counter. As you put your shoes on, you paused for a moment, feeling the finality of your actions. You were ready to turn off the lights and walk out of the door, the silence of the apartment echoing your own sense of abandonment. Just as you reached for the switch, the doors opened with a soft creak that seemed to reverberate through the entire space. 

There stood Mingi, his face pale and eyes wide with a mixture of shock and disbelief, as if he had seen a ghost. His presence, so unexpected and surreal in that moment, made your heart skip a beat. The silence between you was deafening, filled with the weight of unspoken words and unresolved emotions. For a split second, neither of you moved, as if frozen in time. 

"What is going on?" he asked, his eyes finding your gaze as he swallowed hard. 

You took a deep breath, feeling a lump form in your throat. "I can't do this anymore," you replied, your voice trembling. 

His expression shifted from confusion to concern. "What do you mean? What are you talking about?" 

"I mean us, Mingi. I'm not even a part of your life anymore," you said, tears welling up in your eyes. "I packed my bags. I'm leaving." 

Mingi's eyes widened in shock, and he took a step closer. "Leaving? No baby, you can't just leave." 

You shook your head, feeling the weight of the decision pressing down on you. "I deserve more than this. I'm done. We're done," you said, almost out of breath, your voice trembling with a mix of anger and sorrow. 

Mingi's face contorted with emotion, his eyes pleading as he reached out to you. "Please, let's talk about this," he said, desperation lacing his voice. 

You looked at him, your heart breaking all over again. "It's too late, Mingi," you responded, trying to keep your resolve strong even as tears streamed down your face. "I'm so sick of pretending everything's alright, that you haven't changed," you continued, your frustration bubbling to the surface. 

Mingi stepped closer, his hands reaching for yours, desperation evident in his voice. "What are you talking about? I'm still the same, I’m still your boyfriend who would do anything for you." 

You took a deep breath, your voice trembling as you confronted him. "Are you even aware my birthday was a week ago and you haven't showed up to the party?" 

Mingi's face fell, a look of guilt and realization washing over him. "I... I didn't know. I'm so sorry," he stammered, but the damage was already done. 

"So no, Mingi, you are not the same. My boyfriend would show up to my birthday party, hell he would organize it himself. And you know what you did that night? You were sitting in a fucking club with your fellow rappers doing God knows what," you spat, the pain in your words cutting through the air. "My boyfriend loved me, he wanted to spend time with me, he cherished me, he would never leave without kissing me and telling me he loves me," you said, your voice cracking. "You are not him." 

Mingi's shoulders slumped, the weight of his actions finally seeming to hit him. "I messed up. I know I did, and I'm so sorry," he whispered, his voice cracking. 

‘’Sorry is not enough,’ you took a deep breath, your eyes filling with tears. "I'm so sick and tired of justifying your shitty behavior in front of my parents, our friends, and most definitely myself. Every time they ask me where you are or why you're not around, I must come up with excuses. It's exhausting, and honestly, I'm tired of lying for you." 

Mingi's eyes filled with tears, his voice breaking as he whispered, "I never wanted to let you down. I know I've been distant, but I never stopped loving you." 

You shook your head, "You don’t love me, Mingi. Actions speak louder than words, and your actions have clearly shown me where I stand in your life. When was the last time you took me out, huh? When was the last time you asked me how I was doing? When was the last time you made love to me, not just fucked me after your show, huh?" you demanded, each question hitting him like a blow. 

Mingi's face crumpled as he absorbed your words. "I didn't realize... I thought you understood how busy I've been," he mumbled, his voice tinged with regret. 

"Busy? We all have busy lives. But love means making time, no matter what," you said, wiping away your tears. "I can't keep waiting for you to remember that." 

Mingi's tears began to flow freely, his voice barely a whisper. "Please, don't go. I promise I'll change, I'll make things right," he pleaded, but you could see the doubt in his eyes. 

"Since you went viral, you haven't even taken me to your shows, to the afterparties. I don't know your new friends. Do they know about me?" you asked, your voice rising with each word. Mingi's hesitation spoke volumes, and you felt another crack in your already shattered heart. "That's what I thought," you murmured, more to yourself than to him. "If they don't know about me, then maybe you don't want them to. Maybe that's why it's easier for you to forget I exist." 

Mingi's eyes widened, realization dawning on him. "No, it's not like that," he tried to argue, but the conviction in his voice was gone. The silence between you grew heavier, filled with all the things left unsaid over the past months. 

"Tell me honestly, now. You're rapping about fucking bitches and maybe that's really what you're doing in those clubs, huh?" you spat, the accusation hanging heavily in the air. 

Mingi's face paled, his eyes wide with shock and hurt. "How could you even accuse me of that?" he asked, his voice trembling with a mixture of anger and pain. "I would never do something like that to you. You mean everything to me." he stammered, his voice barely above a whisper. He took a step closer, desperation in his eyes. "I swear, it's not what you think. Those lyrics, they're just part of the persona. They don't mean anything." 

You let out a bitter laugh, the sound echoing through the silent apartment. "Is that supposed to make me feel better? That it's all just an act? Because it doesn't. It just makes me feel like I don't even know who you are anymore," you retorted, your voice trembling with emotion. "You spend all your time with these people, living this life that I'm not a part of. How am I supposed to believe you when you say it's not real?" 

Mingi's shoulders slumped, the weight of your words pressing down on him. "I know I've made mistakes. I know I've been distant, but I never wanted to hurt you. I thought you understood how much pressure I'm under," he said, his voice cracking. 

"Being under pressure doesn't give you the right to treat me like I don't matter," you shot back, wiping away the tears from your rosy cheeks. "You used to make me feel like I was the most important person in the world. Now, I feel like I'm just another obligation, something you can push aside when it suits you." 

Mingi's eyes lit up with a sudden realization. "Please give me a moment, I know what will make you stay," he said, his voice filled with a newfound sense of urgency. Before you could respond, he turned and rushed towards the bedroom. You stood there, your heart pounding in your chest as you listened to the sounds of Mingi frantically ruffling through drawers and opening cabinets. The noise grew louder, punctuated by the occasional clatter of objects being moved aside. After what felt like an eternity, Mingi emerged from the bedroom, his face flushed and his breath heavy. Clutched tightly in his hand was a small, elegant box. He walked towards you, his eyes never leaving yours, and with shaking hands, he opened the box to reveal a stunning, custom-made Tiffany engagement ring. 

"This... this is what I was waiting for," he said, his voice trembling with emotion. "I wanted everything to be perfect before I asked you. I know I've messed up, but please, give me one more chance. I love you, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you." Tears welled up in his eyes as he held the ring out to you, his entire being pleading for forgiveness and another chance. You stared at the ring, the weight of the moment pressing down on you as you tried to process everything. Mingi took a deep breath and then, in one fluid motion, he dropped to one knee, holding the ring up towards you. His eyes were filled with desperation and hope, the tears streaming down his face reflecting the sincerity of his words. "Y/N please, marry me," he whispered, his voice breaking. "I know I've been distant, and I know I've hurt you, but I want to make it right. I want to spend the rest of my life making it up to you, showing you how much you mean to me. Please, give me another chance." You stood there, your heart pounding in your chest as you looked down at Mingi, the man you had loved for so long, now kneeling before you with a ring in his hand. The future you have always dreamed of was right there in front of you, and you cried harder at the sight. The ring, a symbol of the life you had envisioned together, glittered in the dim light of the penthouse. It was everything you had ever wanted, yet the weight of the disappointments and heartbreaks made it difficult to embrace. The tears streamed down your face, mixing with the raw emotions that had been building up inside you. You couldn't help but think of all the broken promises, the lonely nights, and the feeling of being forgotten. The ring was beautiful, but it couldn't erase the pain that had accumulated over time. 

Mingi kneeled there in front of you, his eyes filled with a mixture of hope and desperation, waiting for your response."Now we have enough money to book the beach venue you dreamed of," Mingi started, trying to control his own tears. "I will order you a custom dress from the designer you told me about, inspired by the Disney princess you loved since you were little," he added, his voice trembling with desperation. "And we will go to Belize for our honeymoon," he continued, his words coming out in a rush. "We will rent a whole house by the beach, just like you always wanted. Every morning, we'll wake up to the sound of the waves, and every night, we'll fall asleep under the stars. There won't be a single day when I won't prove to you how much I love you," Mingi's voice cracked, his eyes pleading. "Please, give me another chance. Please marry me. I promise I'll be the man you fell in love with, the one who would move heaven and earth just to see you smile. We’ll make new memories, beautiful ones that will overshadow all the pain I’ve put you through. I swear, I'll spend every moment making it up to you, showing you that my love is real and unwavering. So please, please say yes." The image he painted was truly everything you ever wanted, the plans you made together on countless nights, dreaming of a future filled with love and happiness. The beach venue, the custom dress, the honeymoon in Belize—all of it was exactly what you had envisioned. It was as if he had taken every whispered wish, every secret hope, and turned them into a tangible reality. His words, filled with desperation and promise, tugged at your heartstrings, making you yearn for the life you had once believed was possible. The thought of waking up to the sound of waves, falling asleep under the stars, and creating new, beautiful memories was almost too tempting to resist. In that moment, you saw a glimpse of the life you had always wanted. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you tried to steady your racing heart. The weight of the moment felt almost suffocating, but you knew you had to make a choice. When you opened your eyes again, you looked at Mingi, your voice barely above a whisper, 

"I can't," you choked out, your voice barely above a whisper. The words felt like shards of glass slicing through the air. You saw the hope in Mingi's eyes flicker and fade, replaced by a look of utter devastation. His shoulders slumped as he dropped completely to the floor, the ring slipping from his grasp and falling to the floor with a loud echo. You heard him cry out in agony, and it broke your heart all over again, shattering it completely. For a moment, the silence was deafening, filled only with the sound of your ragged breaths and Mingi's soft sobs. You stood there, frozen, the weight of your decision pressing down on you like a physical force. Every fiber of your being wanted to rush to him, to take back the words and make everything alright, but you knew deep down that it was too late. 

Mingi's tears flowed freely now, his face a portrait of anguish. "Please, don't go," he pleaded, his voice raw with desperation. "I need you. I don't know what I'll do without you." 

"I'm so sorry, Mingi," you said, your voice trembling as you took a step back. "I wish things could be different, but I can't keep living like this." 

Mingi looked up at you, his eyes red and swollen with tears. "Please, don't leave me," he pleaded, his voice cracking with desperation. "I can't lose you. I'll do anything to make it right, I swear." 

You shook your head, "It's not about what you can do, Mingi. It's about what you haven't done." With a heavy heart, you turned towards the door, picking up your bags. Each step felt like a thousand, the weight of your decision making it almost unbearable to move. As you reached the door, you paused, looking back at Mingi one last time. The sight of him, broken and pleading, was almost too much to bear. "Goodbye, Mingi," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "I hope you come across something more than better, something that brings you true happiness and fulfillment. And I’m so sorry it’s not me." With those final words, you turned the knob and stepped out into the hallway, closing the door softly behind you. The echo of the door click reverberated through the empty penthouse, a stark reminder of what you were leaving behind. 

eight months later

It was a Saturday evening, and you were lying in your bed, scrolling through TV channels because apparently your best friend forgot to pay for your Netflix subscription. These past months, you were figuring your life out from the base. With your breakup, everything changed. You were now living in a small apartment, shared with two of your friends to make the rent cheaper. You hadn't saved up much while being with Mingi, mainly taking part-time jobs to be available whenever Mingi needed your help with his career—booking a venue, simply helping around with scanning tickets or delivering merch. You used to spend your days running errands and managing small tasks that kept his career afloat, and in return, he assured you that you didn't need to worry about your own income. Then, when the money came, he simply wouldn’t let you work, claiming what was his was yours, and he had more than enough. His generosity was comforting, but it also left you unprepared for the financial independence you now had to face. So apart from dealing with the heartbreak, you’ve also been struggling a bit with a reality without him. 

Now, as you lay in your small bedroom, you couldn't help but reflect on how drastically your life had shifted. The luxurious apartment you once shared with Mingi was now a distant memory, replaced by this compact space that you now called home. It was filled with laughter and companionship from your two friends, but it also served as a constant reminder of Mingi’s absence. 

The breakup had not only shattered your heart but also forced you to reevaluate your priorities and rebuild your life from scratch. Every day was a struggle to find your footing, to rediscover who you were without Mingi, and to carve out a path for yourself. Despite the challenges, you were slowly learning to embrace this new reality, one step at a time. 

After a long search, you finally stumbled upon a music award show where a band you liked was performing, and you found yourself intrigued. A few other performances passed; the MC announced they would reveal the winner for the Album of the Year in the rap category. Despite trying to ignore all updates about Mingi, you knew he had released a new album earlier this year, so seeing him being nominated didn’t surprise you. You couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions as his name was mentioned. You saw him through your TV screen, his hair now cut short and dyed a vibrant pink, a stark contrast to his previous look. His nose was pierced, and you must admit it made him look even hotter. He was wearing a sleek black blazer with nothing underneath, the simplicity of his outfit highlighting his confidence. He looked absolutely gorgeous, his features as handsome as ever, capturing your attention completely. You couldn’t help but smile, a wave of nostalgia and admiration washing over you. Your heart began to beat faster with the excitement and joy of seeing him again. 

And of course, Mingi won. You didn’t know exactly why, but you couldn’t help yourself—you clapped your hands enthusiastically. You were so incredibly proud of him and his achievement. With a wide smile on his face, he stood up from his seat, took a deep breath, and confidently hopped on stage. He walked over to the microphone, adjusted it to his height, and paused for a moment to gather his thoughts. "Thank you, everyone," Mingi began, his voice steady but filled with emotion. "This album means the world to me, and it wouldn't have been possible without the incredible team behind me and the fans who have supported me through everything." He paused, taking a deep breath before continuing. "I want to dedicate this award to someone very special to me, someone who was with me since my early days." Mingi's words hung in the air, and you felt a lump form in your throat. You knew he was talking about you. The memories of your time together, the sacrifices you made, and the dreams you shared all came rushing back. Despite the pain and heartbreak, a part of you was deeply touched by his acknowledgment. He continued, "I know I've made mistakes, and I've hurt the only person I have ever loved. But this album represents a journey of growth and redemption. It's about learning from those mistakes and becoming a better person." The audience applauded, but your mind was elsewhere, lost in the whirlwind of emotions Mingi's speech had stirred within you. You couldn't help but wonder if he truly had changed, if he had finally realized the impact of his actions. As the applause died down, Mingi took a step back, holding the award close to his chest. He looked directly into the camera, his eyes seemingly searching for yours through the screen. "You know," Mingi continues, "this special person told me that since I gained popularity, I’ve been only rapping about fucking bitches, and she hated that." Mingi smiled and looked at the award in his hands. "So, with this album, I came back to my roots, to lyrics that truly mattered and reflect who I am." As the applause echoed around him, Mingi took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his words and the emotions they carried. He remembered the countless nights he spent writing, the struggles he faced, and the moments of doubt. "I don’t know where she’s at now, what she’s doing," he paused, running a hand through his hair, his eyes filled with regret "I wanted to be a man and respect her decision to leave me, so I never reached out." His voice cracked, the weight of his words sinking in "Because the truth is she deserves way better than me." He swallowed hard, his eyes glistening with unshed tears "I don’t even know if this will reach her, but if it does, I just want her to know that I still, very much love her." A tear finally escaped, rolling down his cheek "And that life without her is shit." He took a deep breath, his voice barely a whisper. He glanced around, seeing familiar faces of fellow artists and friends who knew his story then he looked straight at the camera. "So, to my ex, to the one I prayed to end up with, thank you for breaking my heart. This one is for you." He raised his award and bowed. As he left the stage, you couldn't help but feel a surge of mixed emotions. The love you once shared was still there, buried beneath the pain and heartbreak, but his words made you wonder if there might still be a chance for redemption and healing. You sat there, stunned and overwhelmed, tears streaming down your face. The raw emotion in Mingi's speech had reopened old wounds, but it also made you question if there was a possibility for a new beginning. 

Too caught up in your thoughts, you didn't notice when the cameras started to broadcast live from backstage. An elegant reporter, dressed in a chic green dress, stood waiting with a microphone in hand. Her eyes sparkled with anticipation as she spotted Mingi approaching, clutching his award tightly. She greeted him with a warm smile and a nod, gesturing for him to join her on a plush, cream-colored couch set up for the interview. As Mingi took his seat next to her, the reporter's smile widened. "Congratulations, Mingi, on your incredible win tonight!" she began, her voice smooth and professional. "How does it feel to take home the Album of the Year award?" 

Mingi took a deep breath, trying to steady his emotions. "It feels surreal," he admitted, his voice slightly hoarse from the whirlwind of emotions he had experienced on stage. "This album was a labor of love and a journey of self-discovery. Winning this award means the world to me." 

The reporter nodded; her expression empathetic. "You've mentioned that this album, Empty Box, holds a lot of personal significance. Can you tell us more about the inspiration behind it?" 

"The title of the album, Empty Box, symbolizes a metaphorical space where I have placed all the love I couldn’t give, oh god I hate to call her that but, to my ex-girlfriend." Mingi's eyes welled up with tears, and he swallowed hard. "It encompasses not just the love, but also our unfulfilled dreams, the cherished memories we created together, and the mistakes we made along the way." He paused, taking a moment to gather his thoughts, his emotions visibly overwhelming him. This album reflects my journey, regrets, and lessons I've learned. Each song is a chapter of that story, a piece of my heart that I hope resonates with those who listen." He took a deep breath, his voice cracking as he continued, "I wanted to create something that speaks to the pain of losing someone you love, the guilt of not being able to give them what they deserve, and the hope that maybe, just maybe, we can all find a way to heal from our past mistakes." Mingi's eyes were filled with a mix of sorrow and determination as he spoke, his words carrying the weight of his emotions. He looked directly into the camera, his eyes searching for a connection with those who might be watching. "To anyone out there who feels like they've messed up, like they've lost their way, I want you to know that you're not alone. We all make mistakes, we all have regrets, but that doesn't mean we can't find a way to move forward. This album is my way of reaching out, of saying that it's okay to feel broken, it's okay to struggle, but it's also okay to hope for a better tomorrow." 

The reporter nodded, her eyes reflecting the depth of Mingi's words. "Thank you for sharing such a personal journey with us, Mingi. Your honesty and vulnerability are truly inspiring." She paused for a moment, letting his words resonate with the audience. "What's next for you? Are there any upcoming projects or plans you'd like to share?" 

Mingi took a deep breath, a small smile breaking through his tear-streaked face. "Right now, I just want to take some time to reflect and reconnect with myself. But I promise, there's more music to come, and I hope to continue growing both as an artist and as a person." 

The reporter's eyes sparkled with curiosity as she leaned in slightly. "Is this album some type of closure for you? Are you ready to go out there and find love again? I bet there's plenty of girls, or guys who would die to have a chance with you." 

Mingi took a moment to reflect, his eyes distant. "In many ways, this album has been therapeutic for me. It's allowed me to process my emotions and come to terms with my past. As for finding love again, I think it's important for me to focus on healing and personal growth first. Love is a beautiful thing, but it requires a strong foundation." 

The reporter nodded, her smile warm and understanding. "Thank you for your honesty, Mingi. Your journey is truly inspiring, and I'm sure your fans appreciate your openness." 

Mingi smiled back, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. "Thank you. I'm grateful for the support." With that, the interview concluded, and Mingi stood up, shaking the reporter's hand before walking away. As the camera panned out, you turned off the TV, your mind racing with thoughts and emotions. And you knew you needed to see him again. You've been staying strong since you left him, but now, the wall crashed down and you couldn't stop your racing heart, you couldn't prioritize your mind screaming at you not to do it. The memories of your time together flooded back with an overwhelming force, each one more vivid than the last. The late-night conversations, the shared dreams, the laughter, and even the fights—they all played in your mind like an old movie reel. Despite the pain and the heartbreak, you couldn't deny the love you still felt for him, a love that had been buried but never truly extinguished. Your emotions were a tangled mess, a mix of longing, fear, hope, and regret. You thought about the life you once envisioned with him, the future that seemed so bright and full of promise. Would it still be possible? Could you find a way to rebuild what was broken, to heal the wounds that had festered for so long? As you sat there, your heart pounding in your chest, you knew that you couldn't ignore these feelings. It was as if something was pushing you towards him, giving you a nudge to take a step towards reconciliation. The thought of seeing him again both terrified and excited you, but you knew that you had to follow your heart. With trembling hands, you picked up your phone and stared at the screen, your mind racing with a thousand thoughts. Should you call him? Text him? Show up at his door? You took a deep breath, trying to steady your nerves, and made your decision. You were going to see him. 

You run to your closet, your heart racing with anticipation and anxiety. You put on a hoodie as the autumn air was getting colder, layered a denim jacket on top for extra warmth, and decided to go. Living on the opposite side of the city now, getting to Mingi's place would take more than an hour, but you didn't mind the long journey. As you left your room, one of your roommates looked at you, her eyes filled with curiosity. 

"So, I guess you heard the speech?" she asked, a knowing smile playing on her lips. You could feel the pride welling up inside you, making you even more determined to reach Mingi and share your feelings with him. 

"Yeah, I did," you replied, your voice trembling with emotion. "I need to see him." 

"Honey, I know you want to, but don't forget why you left him in the first place," she said gently, her eyes filled with concern. "You were heartbroken and exhausted. It took so much strength for you to walk away and start rebuilding your life." She paused, her expression softening. "I understand that his speech stirred up a lot of emotions, but please, think carefully about this. Remember all the nights you cried yourself to sleep, all the broken promises. Just don't lose sight of why you made the decision to leave. You deserve to be happy and to find someone who truly values and respects you." 

You nodded, taking her words to heart. "I know, and I won't forget. But I need to know if things can be different now. It's just, I am so proud of him, and I just wish he knew that" you whispered to your roommate, your voice filled with a mix of hope and determination. Your roommate, who had been silently listening, came closer, her eyes reflecting concern and empathy. "I know we've been through so much, and the pain was unbearable at times. But seeing him up there, pouring his heart out, made me realize that a part of me still cares deeply for him. I can't ignore these feelings. I spent so many nights crying myself to sleep, feeling hurt and abandoned, but maybe he's changed. Maybe he's truly learned from his mistakes. I need to see for myself if there's a chance for us to rebuild what we once had, to heal together and find a way back to each other." 

Your friend reached out, gently squeezing your hand, her touch offering a silent reassurance. Her eyes softened as she spoke, "I understand why you feel this way. It's not easy to let go of someone you love, especially when there's still a part of you that believes in him. But you need to be sure that he's really changed, that he's willing to put in the effort to make things right this time." 

You nodded, feeling a lump form in your throat. "I just wish he understood that despite everything, I don't hold any grudges. I want him to know that I forgive him and that I'm willing to give him another chance if he's ready to make things right." Your voice trembled slightly, the weight of your emotions making it difficult to speak. 

Your roommate gave you a warm, encouraging smile. "You have a big heart, and it's clear that you still care about him deeply. Just make sure you protect yourself too. If he's really changed, he'll show you through his actions, not just words. Take it one step at a time and trust your instincts. You deserve to be happy, and if giving him another chance feels right to you, then follow your heart." Her words offered a sense of comfort and clarity, helping to ease the turmoil inside you. You took a deep breath, feeling a renewed sense of hope. 

"Thank you," you said, your voice filled with gratitude. "I need to do this for myself, to know if there's still a chance for us." With that, you hugged your best friend and stepped out into the autumn night. 

The journey to Mingi's place felt like an eternity, each passing moment filled with a mixture of anticipation and fear. As the bus drew closer to his building, you couldn't help but feel a surge of doubt. What if this was a mistake? What if you were setting yourself up for more heartache? But the memory of Mingi's heartfelt speech and the love you still felt for him pushed you forward. 

When you finally arrived, you stood outside his door, taking a deep breath to steady your nerves. With a trembling hand, you knocked, the sound echoing through the hallway. To your surprise, the door is opened by an elderly man, dressed in an elegant suit. His eyes widen in surprise as he sees you standing there. "Good evening, sir," you say hesitantly, trying to mask your confusion. "I’m sorry for the late visit but I'm here to see Mingi. Is he already back?" The man's expression shifts from surprise to bewilderment. 

"I'm sorry," he replies, his voice carrying a hint of confusion. "But I believe you have the wrong address. Nobody by the name of Mingi lives here." He looks at you sympathetically, as if trying to help you figure out your mistake. 

Your heart sank, and you felt a wave of confusion wash over you. "But this was his address," you murmured, feeling lost. 

The elderly man gave you a kind smile, "I moved in here few months ago, maybe he was a previous owner of this apartment?" 

Your heart sank even further as you realized that Mingi had moved. "Thank you," you said softly, turning away from the door, feeling a mix of disappointment and confusion. As you walked back to the bus stop, the doubt began to creep in again. Maybe meeting with him would be a mistake? The universe seemed to be throwing obstacles in your path, as if trying to tell you something. Perhaps it was a sign that some things are better left in the past, that moving forward meant leaving certain chapters closed. You couldn't help but think about all the reasons you left in the first place, the pain and the heartbreak that led you to this very moment. Was it worth reopening old wounds for a chance that things might be different? As you boarded the bus, you decided to give it one last shot, you took your phone out. You scrolled through your contacts and found Mingi's number, your finger hovering over the call button. Taking a deep breath, you pressed it and held the phone to your ear, your heart pounding as it began to ring. After a few moments, you heard a familiar message on the other end, "The number you have dialed no longer exists." 

The automated message echoed in your ear, a stark reminder of the distance that now separated you from Mingi. You pulled the phone away, staring at the screen in disbelief. How could it be? You had been so certain that reaching out to him was the right thing to do, but now, it felt like the universe was conspiring against you. You tried calling again, but the same message played, confirming that Mingi's number had indeed been disconnected. A sense of finality washed over you, making the reality of the situation sink in even deeper. It felt as if a door had been firmly closed, leaving you standing on the outside, unable to reach the person you once held so dear. As you sat back on the bus, the city lights blurring past the window, you couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions. Disappointment, sadness, and a lingering sense of what could have been. The memories of your time together replayed in your mind, each one a bittersweet reminder of the love you had lost. Deep down, you knew that this might be the universe's way of telling you to let go, to move forward with your life. With a heavy heart, you put your phone away and leaned back in your seat, taking a deep breath. As the bus continued its route, you gazed out at the city, the lights flickering like distant stars.  

six months later

You just started your shift; the day was going to be long and tiring. With holidays fast approaching, people were buzzing to buy new goods. You were working as a manager in one of the luxury shopping centers, a position that demanded a great deal of patience and resilience. The opulence of the surroundings was a stark contrast to the stress that came with the job. The elegant displays and high-end brands attracted a clientele that was demanding and often indifferent to the staff's efforts. Managing a team in such an environment was no small feat. You had to ensure that everything ran smoothly, from inventory management to customer service. The rich customers, with their endless requests and high expectations, often tested the limits of your endurance. They seemed to suck the life out of you, leaving you drained by the end of the day. Yet, you couldn't afford to show any signs of fatigue. Your role required you to maintain a calm and composed demeanor, addressing complaints with a smile and ensuring that every shopper left satisfied. The holiday season only amplified the challenges. The influx of customers meant longer hours and heightened pressure. Each day felt like a marathon, with waves of shoppers flooding in, eager to make their purchases. The store was a hive of activity, with sales associates rushing to assist customers, restock shelves, and manage transactions. Amidst the chaos, you had to keep a watchful eye, ready to step in whenever issues arose. 

You were on your way to the staff area to take a break for lunch, feeling exhausted from the busy morning shift. The holiday rush had turned the shopping center into a whirlwind of activity, and you were grateful for a brief break. Just as you were about to reach the staff area, one of your co-workers called out your name. You rolled your eyes, already anticipating another request or issue that needed your immediate attention. With a deep breath, you turned to face her, trying to mask your frustration with a polite smile. 

"I'm really sorry to bother you, but we have a situation that requires your expertise. There's a particularly demanding customer, and the supervisor has tried everything but just can't seem to handle it. She asked me to find you because we really need your help with this. Would you mind stepping in to assist? I know you're on your way to lunch, but it would mean a lot to us." 

You sighed internally, knowing that this was part of the job. "Alright, lead the way," you replied, forcing a reassuring smile. Following your co-worker, you mentally prepared yourself for yet another challenging interaction, hoping that it wouldn't take too long so you could finally enjoy your much-needed break. 

She led you to one of the private dressing rooms. From a distance, you could hear a female voice demanding something from her, you supposed, boyfriend. "Oh baby, what do you think about this one?" you heard as you approached the door. Your heart skipped a beat when you recognized the voice that responded—it was Mingi. You stopped in your tracks, your mind racing. The reality of seeing him again, and with someone new, hit you like a ton of bricks. But you took a deep breath, steadied yourself, and pushed forward, opening the door to the dressing room. Inside, you saw Mingi standing next to a woman who was examining herself in the mirror, holding up an elegant dress. The room was filled with an awkward tension as Mingi's eyes met yours. For a moment, time seemed to stand still, the memories of your past flooding back with a vivid intensity. 

Mingi's expression shifted from surprise to a mix of emotions—confusion, regret, and perhaps a hint of longing. The woman, oblivious to the charged atmosphere, continued to admire herself in the mirror, adjusting the dress and waiting for Mingi's opinion. 

You felt like the air was taken out of your lungs. He was here, standing before you, after so much time had passed. Memories of your time together flooded back, each one more vivid and overwhelming than the last. You had to swallow hard and clench your fist to keep the act up, to maintain your composure in front of him and his new girlfriend. The mix of emotions inside you—shock, longing, regret—threatened to break through, but you knew you had to stay professional. This was your job, your life now, and you couldn't let the past disrupt it. "Excuse me madam, I’m a manager here," you said, your voice steady despite the turmoil inside. "Is there anything I can assist you with?" 

"Oh yes, we've been looking forward to buying the limited-edition shoes from the new collection," she said, her eyes lighting up with excitement. 

You took a deep breath at her words, trying to maintain your professionalism. "I'm really sorry to inform you about this, as my coworker already told you, madam, the shoes I believe you are referring to are only available for special order." 

Her enthusiasm faltered slightly, replaced by a look of disappointment. "Special order? Is there any way we can place one now?" 

"Unfortunately, the special-order period for those shoes has already ended," you explained gently. "They were available for a limited time, and we are currently out of stock. However, we do have a selection of other exclusive items that might interest you." 

You caught Mingi's eyes boring into you, his face pale and expression frozen. He stood still, as if rooted to the spot, and he seemed to not even breathe. The intensity of his gaze sent a wave of emotions crashing over you, each one more overwhelming than the last. You felt your eyes watering, a rush of emotions threatening to spill over. You blinked quickly, trying to get rid of the tears and maintain your composure. This was neither the time nor the place to let your feelings show, but the sight of him, so close yet so distant, made it nearly impossible to hold back the tide of emotions. 

The girl in front of you sighed, clearly disheartened by the news. Mingi, sensing her disappointment, placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. "It's all right," he said softly. "Let's take a look at what else they have. I'm sure you can find something you'll love." 

She turned to you with a sharp expression, her tone shifting to one of impatience. "Do you even know who my boyfriend is?’’ 

You swallowed hard, forcing a polite smile despite the tension. "Yes, madam, I'm well aware. Please allow me to show you some other exclusive items that might catch your interest."  

"Baby, won't you do something about it?" She once again turned to Mingi, her voice carrying a hint of frustration, but his eyes never left yours, the unspoken words hanging heavily in the air between you. 

Mingi shifted uncomfortably, his eyes meeting his girlfriend for a brief moment before he turned to you again. "I'll see what I can do," he said softly, trying to soothe her. 

You took a deep breath, gathering your professionalism. "As I mentioned earlier, the special-order period has ended, and we are out of stock for the limited-edition shoes. However, if you'd like, I can take your contact information and notify you if any new limited editions become available in the future." 

The woman sighed, clearly not satisfied, but nodded reluctantly. "Fine, let's do that then." She handed you her information, and you quickly jotted it down, aware of Mingi's gaze still lingering on you. 

"Thank you for your understanding," you said, handing back her details. "Is there anything else I can assist you with today?" 

She shook her head, her disappointment evident. "No, that's all. Come on, baby, let's go." As they turned to leave, Mingi hesitated for a moment, his eyes locking with yours one last time. You could see the unspoken words and the regret in his gaze, you silently hoped he would say something, anything. You gave him a small, professional nod, and without a word, he turned away, following his girlfriend out of the dressing room. Once they were gone, you let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding. 

You realized that the man you loved was no more. Instead, you met with someone who wore his face, who had his voice. Someone who was a stranger. The warmth that once radiated from his eyes was now replaced by an unfamiliar coldness. It was as if time had reshaped him into a different person, one that you could no longer recognize. The memories of your past seemed like a cruel illusion, a reminder of what once was and what could never be again. You realized with a heavy heart that the essence of the man you fell in love with had faded, leaving behind a mere shadow of who he used to be. 

Don't talk to strangers, they say, or you might fall in love. And when that love fades, those familiar faces turn into strangers once more. The irony of it all stung deeply. The very person who once knew you inside and out had become an enigma, a puzzle with pieces that no longer fit. As you watched him walk away, hand in hand with someone new, you couldn't help but feel a profound sense of loss. The man you once knew, the man you once loved, was gone. And in his place stood a stranger who bore his likeness but none of the familiarity. 

The journey of love had taken you full circle, bringing you back to a place of solitude and reflection. The lessons learned were etched deeply into your soul, a testament to the transient nature of relationships. You couldn't help but wonder if you would ever recognize that familiar face again, or if he would forever remain a stranger, a fleeting memory in the tapestry of your life. 

𝐮𝐧𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐟𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐟𝐥𝐮𝐟𝐟, 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭, 𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 𝐭𝐛𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞: 𝐭𝐛𝐝

“hey, mingi are you ok baby?” you ask as you wave your hand in front of his face. “sorry i just um” he trails off as his eyes wander towards the tv playing the unwatched movie, on but forgotten by the sudden rush of emotion. “hey it’s ok, no need to apologize i’ll be right back i’m gonna grab some more snacks” you grab the empty bowl and head past the other members into the kitchen. “hyung you ok, you’re zoning out?” jongho asks from beside him on the couch, though his concern falls on deaf ears. mingi knows the thoughts in his head are wrong in their fightwith his feelings, but he can’t help but to second guess everything.    

   he can barely hear the action packed movie as the fight scene unfolds, the boys shouting in victory for their winning hero. he can hear his heart racing along with those loud intrusive thoughts. He wishes all his thoughts would just disappear and leave him to peacefully watch the movie, but not all wishes can come true.. 

꠸ꪻ ꪮꪀꪶꪗ ꪻꪖᛕꫀᦓ ꪮꪀᥴꫀ

ᴾᵃⁱʳⁱⁿᵍˢ: ᴵᵈᵒˡ! ᴹⁱⁿᵍⁱ ˣ ᴾʳⁱⁿᶜᵉˢˢ! ʳᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ

ᴳᵉⁿʳᵉ: ᵃⁿᵍˢᵗ, ᶠˡᵘᶠᶠ, ᵃᵘ

ᵂᵒʳᵈ ᶜᵒᵘⁿᵗ: 5.6ᵏ

ᵂᵃʳⁿⁱⁿᵍˢ: ᵐᵉⁿᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ᵒᶠ ᶠᵒʳᶜᵉᵈ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵃʳʳᵃⁿᵍᵉᵈ ᵐᵃʳʳⁱᵃᵍᵉˢ, ᵈᵉᵖʳᵉˢˢⁱᵒⁿ ᵃⁿᵈ ˡᵒˢˢ ᵒᶠ ᶠʳᵉᵉᵈᵒᵐ, ᵈᵉˢⁱʳᵉ ᶠᵒʳ ʰᵃᵖᵖⁱⁿᵉˢˢ, ᵐᵉⁿᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ᵒᶠ ᵈʳⁱⁿᵏⁱⁿᵍ, ˢʷᵉᵃʳⁱⁿᵍ

ˢʸⁿᵒᵖˢⁱˢ: ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵍˢ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵃⁿʸ ʷᵒʳˢᵉ ᵗʰᵃⁿ ᵗʰⁱˢ? ᴮᵉⁱⁿᵍ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠⁱᵃⁿᶜᵉ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵉⁿᵉᵐʸ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵐᵒˢᵗ ʰᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ, ᵇᵉⁱⁿᵍ ᶠᵒʳᶜᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ʰᵒˡᵈ ᵇᵃᶜᵏ ᵗᵉᵃʳˢ, ⁿᵒᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵇᵉ ᵗʰⁱˢ ᵇᵃᵈ. ᵀʰᵉʳᵉ ʷᵃˢ ⁿᵒ ʷᵃʸ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵍˢ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵍᵉᵗ ᵇᵉᵗᵗᵉʳ, ʸᵒᵘ ʷᵉʳᵉ ᵗᵒᵒ ᵈᵉᵉᵖ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰᵉ ʰᵒˡᵉ. ᵀʰᵃᵗ'ˢ ʷʰᵃᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵃⁿʸᵒⁿᵉ ʷᵒᵘˡᵈ ᵗʰⁱⁿᵏ ⁱⁿ ᵗʰⁱˢ ˢⁱᵗᵘᵃᵗⁱᵒⁿ. ᵁⁿᵗⁱˡ ʰᵉ ᶜᵃᵐᵉ…

Divider: @cafekitsune

Although the royal family was something that a lot of children desired, it wasn't anything like the books described it. Being restricted from many things and unable to feel the freedom that any human has the right to, having to hold off on food in order to fit the ‘Princess Standard’, holding in tears in order to avoid letting those who looked up to you see you cry, something so simple like friend night was a restriction as it damages the ‘family image’.

Being like any typical only child princess, your job was to sit still and wait until your parents looked for a good prince to take you in and name you queen, it always worked this way around the royal industry, and you weren't no exception.

“Lady… I wanted to inform you that your supper is ready…”

You glanced over at your once shut door and smiled at the maid standing at the fronts of your room, a visible smile appeared on her face as she escorted you out of your room, although you had a notebook in front of you, it was a thank goodness that your lady barged in to inform you about your evening lunch because if not you would've most likely broken down into tears right then and there.

Taking a seat, your butler poured you your evening tea, bringing your meal out to the table, leaving you alone in the comfort of the familiar area and privacy.

Sighing, remembeing all of your upcoming schedules, not to mention one of them was only a couple hours away. Early the next morning you had to make your way to a special event hosted specifically for royalty and celebrities, although you were excited to meet new people and step out of your comfort zone without the need to worry about your parents coming along, half of you just wanted to ditch the meet up and run off to a field of flowers in order to take a breath of fresh air, no one to watch you wear tight fitting dresses or heels, and get a sense of freedom for the first time since your childhood.

Nervously walking back to your room. Feeling uneasy at the thought of seeing the face of that prince who you so desperately wished not to see, you just wanted to make new friendships and meet new people, however you could only pray that throughout the event you wouldn't have to look at him, nore speak a word to him.

After all, it was all you wanted, and all you asked for.

The next morning, you made your way to the familiar building that would hold some of the biggest celebrities at the moment, you sighed nervously as you would be meeting brand new idols and seeing unfamiliar faces, faces of brand new idols, whom you hadn't had the chance to see on TV yet.

___________________________________________

The special hostess was someone you were familiar with, for your regular schedule it'd be the same thing. Conference, photoshoots, if journalist approached you you would answer all their questions, and if you got lucky… communicate with other guest.

However during the conference…

No matter how hard you tried… the tears were there, and they wouldn't go away, you excused yourself from the table and walked over to a secluded corner where you swore no one would find you. You let your tears fall as you recalled your mothers words.

“You're going to marry Prince Lee.”

“Mother, I do not agree with this...”

“I apologize dear but you need to take over whenever me and your father can't. The prince showed great interest in meeting you and you can't just dismiss these important moments, you knew they were going to come eventually.”

“You can't force me to marry someone whom I do not wish to”

“If it were me I'd let you choose, however your parents know best-”

“Of course.. parents always know best.”

After that you stormed off and didn't allow your mom to finish what she needed to say. The tension was big that morning and everyone in the house knew that your mom and you had argued, it was obvious. You being a part of the royal family yet unable to enjoy the title that many children dreamed of, seeking freedom and that exciting life that everybody else had, often finding yourself thinking the words “why me?”-

“Excuse me?”

Crap.. had you been crying too loud? How could you forget you were still in public and in a quite important meeting. Of course someone would come looking for you-

“I'm sorry! I completely lost myself-” however your words stopped upon seeing a handsome man standing in front of you. He looked like an idol. Small eyes, fair skin, dark brown hair, chocolate colored eyes, and most outstanding of all, he was tall.

“I just wanted to check and see if everything was okay… you seemed upset or bothered by something. Would you need to talk about it?” He sounded sincere, words sounded cautious and full of pity.

“Trust me I'd love to talk about my intrusive thoughts, however this is a personal problem.” you responded, attempting to hold back from completely breaking down onto the stranger.

“That's okay… I'm a stranger so I get it… let me introduce myself, I'm Song Mingi.” a smile broke onto the boy's face as he stared at you waiting for your personal introduction.

You couldn't help but smile back at such an innocent face, this time your smile contained nothing but reality, a sincere smile that you couldn't hold back. Something you hadn't felt since childhood.

“My name is L/n Y/n. Pleasure to meet you Song Mingi.” You responded, extending your hand to shake his.

“Pleasure to meet you L/n Y/n. Hope we can become good friends!” His smile was heartwarming, full of kindness and sensitivity, for the first time in years. You felt happy in the time you least expected to feel such an emotion.

“Mingi..!? Dude! Stop walking away from the group like that-” you heard another voice call from a distance, upon looking over you saw an unfamiliar face who quickly entered into panic as he approached his proclaimed friend.

“Oh my god! It's a pleasure!” the other guy said as he bowed his head and pulled Mingi down with him.

“Oh no- there's no need for that-”

“I deeply apologize for my friend's behavior… he can get out of hand sometimes..” the boy interrupted, with a nervous look on his face as he awaited your answer.

“Don't worry about it. Your friend is a lovely person, I hope we'll be able to meet again soon.” You responded, trying to show the new guy that you were friendly and nothing to be afraid of.

“Oh thank goodness… again I apologize for everything. I hope you can excuse us, because we must make our departure now.”

“Of course, that is okay.” You quickly bowed and waved at the two guys who were now walking away. Mingi turned back and called out “Bye!” before disappearing with his friend.

“YALL!! MINGI WAS ABLE TO HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH L/N Y/N!!!”

“WHAT!?”

Everyone's eyes shifted to Mingi who was returning with a bright smile on his face.

“I don't get why you guys are so surprised… she's nice-”

“BOY! DO YOU HAVE AN IDEA WHO YOU JUST TALKED TO!?” San called, attempting to fix his bag and place it inside the small cubby on the wall.

“Um… L/n Y/n…?”

“Were you respectful? Did you at least greet her respectfully!?” Seonghwa asked with a very concerned pitch.

“I think…?” Mingi responded hesitantly, unknowing what to respond and beginning to question himself and his manners.

“Real question is if you were respectful Woo-”

“I WAS REALLY RESPECTFUL!!! BUT MINGI SEEMED WAYYYY TOO NONCHALANT TO BE IN FRONT OF SOMEONE AS POWERFUL AS L/N!!!”

Everyone glanced at Mingi and shook their heads in disappointment as Mingi grew a concerned look on his face.

“Is she someone important?” Mingi asked nervously, beginning to regret speaking to you in the first place.

“Mingi… if she's here of course she's important…” Yunho replied, with a stressed look on his face and Mingi gulped.

“Who is she…?” Mingi once again asked as Yeosang turned and responded “It's the current princess, probably soon to be queen.”

“WHAT!?”

The members sighed and again shook their heads in disappointment referring to Mingi.

“Why was she-” however Mingi stopped mid sentence, almost looking like Mingi’s world glitched completely.

“Why was she..?” Jongho questioned, trying to revive Mingi from his abrupt stop.

“Nevermind. Forget it.”

The members glanced around at each other, confused but understanding, they all nodded and continued their activities.

However, Mingi's mind was far from empty.

Why would a princess… so beautiful like you… be spotted crying…?

You entered your familiar palace, being in a better mood than usual and expected.

Everyone in the household could tell that you were all cheery and skippy, it was rare for you to be all smiley after your 14th birthday, so seeing you in that precise state was shocking to even your parents who were waiting for you in the living room.

“You look excited…”

“Glad you noticed, mother.” You added to the comment with all the anger in your voice that was strong just a few hours ago gone.

“Did something you'd like to talk about happen?” Asked your father who held a building smile on his face.

“I'd rather keep that personal father.”

Your parents, who were shocked by your answer, nodded and allowed you to hold a small bit of privacy from them.

However that happy mood was about to disappear completely when you heard your mother say the words you dreaded to hear.

“Prince Lee!”

The gaze which was once held at your guardians shifted to the end of the room where a tall man in his mid 20’s stood… it was indeed… prince Lee. That stupid prince who ruined everything from start to finish.

“Good to see you today Y/n.”

“Don't direct me by my first name as if we were close.”

A smirk crept onto the man's face, which did nothing but higher your suspicions.

“You must be in a bad mood princess… would you like to talk about it?”

"You seemed upset or bothered by something. Would you need to talk about it?"

“I would've preferred to not see you at all today.”

“I came for a reason, princess, it would come here just for fun.”

“I don't wanna talk about the marriage which hasn't yet been confirmed, I don't wanna ruin my life with any deals either.”

“Princess, it's nothing like that. Just give me a chance to explain it to you one on one.”

Truthfully, you were curious, but you didn't wanna accept anything from this untrustworthy prince.

“It’ll only take two minutes.” He muttered, clearly annoyed by your silence.

“Fine. But make sure to make it quick.” You replied as he rolled his eyes, welcoming himself to go to the other side of your palace uninvited.

“Sure princess.”

Once you both entered a more secluded corner, still guarded and you made sure of it. He looked back at you and smirked lightly.

“What do you want from me? Surely you're not romantically attracted and that's clear.” You asked, unsure of his answer and partly wanting him to just back away and leave you and your loved ones alone.

“Well you're not wrong.” You heard the prince reply, beginning to take a ring out of his pocket.

“Then what is it you want?”

“And why are you entitled to know all of my intentions? Huh?” He said, with a quite aggressive tone, trying to make it clear that he still had yet to speak.

You leaned back on the wall as your shoulders fell in half relief.

“Go on.” You said, attempting to bring his attention back to his words from earlier.

“Listen here, if you try to say anything to your parents about what I do behind the curtains… I'll know. So you better keep that pretty mouth of yours shut or else.”

“I have no reason to expose all that lame shit that you do in your personal life.”

“If you call it lame shit again I'll beat the crap out of you.”

“Beat the crap out of me and the only one who's losing is you. I know you're using me for money, if my parents or the cameras catch you hurting me in any way the weddings off, you can't do anything to me, I'm smart enough to know that.”

You heard a small chuckle come from him as he took out his ring and gifted it to you.

“Just a small gift to get you to shut your mouth.”

You glanced back at him with a knowing smile, as you took the ring and raised it back to him.

“I'll be having this checked!” You said in a mocking tone, knowing he can't hide anything from you.

He nodded knowingly and looked back at you, “Check it, you won't find anything.” you heard him mumble as he began to walk away, you watched him as he approached your parents and shook both of their hands respectfully before making his way out of your property.

“What's that jerk have in mind?” You whispered in a low and quiet voice as you threw the ring away in a nearby trash can.

Night time hit and you dragged yourself to your closet, sliding on some pants that you had hidden at the back of your wardrobe and giving yourself some new makeup to cover your identity, making your way out of the palace by your window, into the direction of the still open local library to pick up a new book to add onto your collection.

On your way to the library, you ran into multiple post boards. Few lights were on and the warm moon illuminated the night sky, these moments were the freedom you so much craved for. Finally a moment of peace and quiet, finally a moment for you to live like any ordinary person, even if it was a secret.

You stopped in your tracks upon noticing 2 figures of 2 men in the distance. You heard them laughing and talking regularly as they approached you so you decided to just continue very cautiously, attempting to keep away from their path..

“Is that L/n..?”

How did he know who you were…? You recognized this voice, but your memory couldn't get a grip of who it was..

‘Continue walking… continue walking… continue walking and don't look back…’ you told yourself repeatedly

“Mingi… that isn't her…”

“Oh- it looked like her for a moment…” you heard the other voice say.

The urge to look back at the mention of your new friend's name was tempting…

So what did you do…?

“Mingi…?”

You turned around to face the comforting face of this man who was once a stranger.

You noticed a surprise look on his face as he burst out a huge smile and rushed over to hug you, of course… you couldn't help it so you hugged him back.

“L/n.. how have you been?”

“Normal I guess…”

Of course, from the scene, you noticed the face of his shocked friend who definitely hadn't expected to see such an important figure out during dark hours of the day which would soon become tomorrow.

He quickly bowed down and brought himself to a stop and loss of words.

“Pleasure to meet you, miss…”

“Please don't bow down in my presence… Please treat me normally.” you managed to say, showing your signature smile as you watched him grow back to ease with all worry fading from his face.

“L/n- this is Yunho.” you heard Mingi say, you extended your hand ready to shake his as he mimicked your movements.

“Jeong Yunho at your services.”

“No… you don't have to be at my services…”

Smiling, you looked back at Mingi ready to say your goodbyes.

“I’m glad we were able to run into each other again… I must get going though- I have limited time and must get going-”

Both men stood and looked at you before Yunho hit Mingi's arm and snapped him back to reality.

“L/n… wouldn't you like to go get drinks with us..? Being up to your status must be difficult.. wouldn't you like to go get some dinner? It's on us.”

The request caught you off guard, you looked around before looking back…

“Isn't that too much…?”

“No..? You probably work so hard everyday, I think a friend out day would do you well.”

“I would love to accept but-” you knew this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, and you hated that you couldn't help but be skeptical, you could always go to the library, anytime, any day with permission. A night out was a huge no-no.

“Are you worried about someone knowing who you are?” Yunho asked in a worried manner.

“That's part of the reason-”

“Mingi brought a jacket with a hood… it could be used to cover your face.” Yunho responded, giving you a small smile as you looked back at Mingi who was taking out the hoodie to show you.

“We're going to a secluded area, not many people go there these days, so chances are that it's going to be empty.” Mingi added, you could tell Mingi was trying very hard to make you accept their offer.

It was weird nevertheless… you almost felt like they somehow knew your situation which creeped you out a little.. not so much, just a little.

You stayed quiet thinking about their offer, ultimately you silently nodded and accepted.

Mingi put his jacket around you as you stood in between the two tall men, who attempted to shield your identity from any passers-bys, Mingi stood close to you as you looked up at him.

When you thought about it you only ever saw him once, you had no idea what he did for a living and the only piece of information you had on him was the fact that he was someone well known and that his name was Song Mingi.

It was the first time you saw him under the moonlight, the first time you heard the beautiful sound of nature and didn't think of it as your top value. You couldn't remember a time when you made the sound of waves crashing together and tree leaves brushing against each other as background noise.

But today? Today was an exception… because no matter how hard you tried, your gaze wouldn't leave the guy who stood next to you, eyes glued onto his features, fingers gripping your hand attempting to keep yourself back from holding his hand.

This was truly a moment for you…

You arrived at the bar which you were quite nervous to be at, mostly because if someone caught you being in such a place you would get in big trouble by both your parents and the public, however all your worries quickly went away as you sat down with both guys who made you feel more comfortable than they were supposed to, or better said, than normal.

You were a person who's trust was hard to gain, so the fact that these two almost newcomers, which was okay but at the same time made you nervous, but you truly felt safe around these two guys who looked to be around your age.

Your drinks came and you were quick to take a sip, the taste of alcohol truly shocked you however it wasn't the worst thing you had ever had so you continued to drink it as the two men joined you.

Mingi turned to you and begun to ask “L/n is it okay for me to ask you if-”

“Y/n…”

Mingi, confused, asked you, “What?”

“Just call me Y/n.” You corrected.

Yunho glanced at Mingi, they both knew the alcohol was beginning to take action. Yunho knowing it would probably end badly, took the glass away from your sight, bringing it near him as you began to move your head down onto your arms which were laying flat on the table.

“I miss the old times…” you managed to stutter out, which made Mingi and Yunho turn to you in order to listen.

“Why do you say that…?” Mingi said cautiously, unwanting to ask the wrong questions or even cross some sort of invasive line.

“I miss when I was stress free… when I was able to do anything without people judging or watching my every move…”

Both of them didn't dare to say a word, as they both felt like they were about to discover something important about your life.

“I feel trapped… why can't I be like any regular human…? Begin a relationship with who I choose…? Why can't I have more moments like these without having to worry all the time about the public…?”

Tears began forming in your eyes as you brought your legs on the chair for some odd reason, perhaps for extra support in order to avoid a breakdown in the middle of two untrusted adults.

“Y/n… you can go on… we'll listen to everything you say even if it lasts the entire night…” Mingi replied, going over to your side and hugging you tightly, in hopes to save your tears from falling off your beautiful face.

Truthfully everything Mingi did made you nervous. Even in a somewhat unhinged state, your heart fluttered at Mingi's low pitched voice speaking to you. Your words deep inside your tongue, getting tangled at all that you wanted to say. Everything he did was perfect and it was really like he heard your silent cries… How could someone understand you so well? How could someone so compassionate and enthusiastic show such sincere feelings

You don't know what happened the rest of that night, you were too out of it to remember and you really don't even recall how much you told them. You knew that you wanted to avoid them because you didn't know how much information they had on you now, but it was hard, because they were one of the only people who made you feel even somewhat safe.

But it was urgent… you had to avoid them.

“Do you think she was honest with everything she said last night?” Yunho asked Mingi as they were in the changing room, putting on their new stage outfits and throwing their old clothes into the small lockers attached to the wall

“She was already pretty drunk by that point, so I don't think she was lying… to add on to that she is royalty so everything she said isn't impossible…”

“It seems a bit off… someone so important hiding something so big that only she and the people working with them know…”

“It does seem weird… guess we really can't trust anyone these days. It's quite terrifying that such a big name is hiding something, and we don't know who it is.”

“I guess we should be extra careful at night and with who we trust-”

“YALL!! WHAT'S TAKING YOU SO LONG!!!???” Wooyoung yelled as he entered the room earning a scream from Mingi.

“HEY!! YOU CAN'T JUST INTRUDE!!!”

“YUH-HUH!!”

The two argued for a while before they both left the room to go get their makeup done, there was a lot that couldn't leave Mingi's mind, but he decided to keep it mostly empty for the time being because he had to focus on performing for the public and his fans.

If there was something he regretted it was not getting your number whenever he had the opportunity to, hearing everything you told him and his best friend the previous night he really couldn't believe just how fucked up the higher ups could be.

He felt off though… and he really didn't know why. Ever since your conversation he couldn't help but remember those words that stood out to him the most.

“Begin a relationship with who I choose…?”

“I just wish I would've had time to meet the right one before this… now It just feels wrong to love someone”

Whatever it was... he noticed it, your pain, your scars, your cuts, your cries.

And you had no idea how much he wanted to help you, get you out of that misery that you had been going through, make you the happiest woman alive, make you smile and laugh everyday. He really wanted to… but he truthfully had no idea how…

Hongjoong’s voice echoed from the end of the room, concerned and attentive he asked “Mingi? Are you okay?”

Mingi snapped back to reality at the sound of Hongjoong’s voice as he noticed Jongho looking at him confused.

“Yeah I'm fine.”

Jongho lifted an eyebrow to Mingi's vague response, which was unusual for Mingi especially in a situation when something was bothering him.

“Mingi, you've been spacing out a lot lately, are you sure you're okay?” San asked and Mingi nodded affirmatively, still on cloud nine even after all the check up questions.

“My minds been filled up but with a bit of water it'll go away.” Mingi confirmed, slowly bringing himself to the small couch where his water bottle was, he drank a bit and began scrolling on his phone to clear his mind and allow a distraction, however it was hard, and no one was there to deny it.

He knew the members would all be the same if they heard everything you said, it was chilling knowing that no one was trustworthy nowadays. Not even the people who are supposed to support the country and fight for the right, because they hid dark secrets that would get anyone killed.

But the question still lingered…

Who...?

“You told someone didn't you..?”

“I don't know if I said anything or mentioned any names…”

“You jerk…” the prince spoke, with an aggressive tone to his voice.”

“At least I'm not denying it.” You waved your hand up in the air and he glanced over at you biting his thumb lightly while desperately looking around for any possible witnesses before pushing you against the wall.

“Didn't I tell you not to talk to anyone about it...?

“Look, truthfully I could blackmail you anytime I wanted but do you see me doing that?”

“If you tried I'd know who the unknown messenger is.”

“Keep telling yourself that” you responded knowing he would be unable to hurt you because of the audioless CCTV camera in the alley.

Quickly slamming his fist against the wall, he let himself wander away before returning to you.

“So you don't know if you told anyone??”

“No, I really can't tell you an honest answer because I don't know.”

“And all because you were drinking!? What princess does that?”

“And what prince runs illegal rings?”

The prince shot a glance at you partly eyeing the camera that was hidden in the corner of the dark remote area.

“I’ll let you go this time. But if you dare to tell anyone else, I will find you.”

“Yes… from here I promise to keep this pretty mouth shut.” You teased him as he flinched slightly and turned back to look at you with invasive eyes and a malicious look that held nothing but trouble.

Nothing more was said, he let you go and he himself left. He had a meeting and couldn't waste too much time with you, you watched him leave as you made the turn just to see a shadow at the end of the alley.

“Good to see you Mingi.”

Mingi flinched and quickly ran up to you, holding your arms in place and shaking you frantically, concerned for your well-being.

“What was that all about!? Are you in danger-”

“Answer me one thing Mingi… how much did I say that night?” Your voice was monotone, low and tired, Mingi leaned back for a moment, a little scared by your sudden change in attitude.

“Y/n, don't stress yourself you didn't say too much, all you mentioned was that there was this prince that couldn't be trusted because he was involved in some bad things, you didn't tell us what or who!” Mingi was truly frantic, scared for your well-being, unwilling to make you feel guilty or bad for breaking a random deal that you had with someone who was untrustworthy and a danger.

“That's a relief… Mingi please don't say a word about it. Forget that night even happened.”

Mingi just nodded, listening to you but more focused on all the scars that surrounded your visible skin, looking at all the fresh and old cuts on your sensitive body.

“I can't let you live like this Y/n…” you heard Mingi say as you glanced up at him with a small chuckle coming out of you.

“Don't be silly.” You responded, slowly retreating yourself from the scene and bringing yourself back to the main road, the safer and more comfortable area.

“Before you go… at least let me take care of you. I can tell you haven't been doing so-” Mingi called out from behind, you turned around with a confused look, eyes focused on the person who you considered a friend and visibly cared for.

You managed to mutter a nervous “What are you talking about?” followed by a light chuckle, slowly turning around to face him fully as he approached you, pushing your hair behind your ear and resting his hands on your shoulders.

“Why do you do this to yourself? You should love yourself… not cut yourself.”

You visibly stopped moving, looking down and seeing all the easily spotted bruises that you didn't notice were in plain sight, you quickly put on your jacket and began to retreat from the main road, attempting to get away from him in order so you wouldn't have to be faced with the same embarrassment.

“Y/n… let me love you. Let me show you what true care feels like. Allow me to demonstrate what I really feel towards you tonight. Give me permission to kiss you all night, hug you all night. Let me get out all of these feelings and give you the chance to feel true happiness and freedom.”

You felt your back push against a wall as Mingi's face got closer to yours, you felt his hands slowly grip your waist in place as he began to bring himself down to the crook of your neck, giving it small pecks and kisses.

“Mingi- this is wrong… stop..”

“Y/n… let me show you what you have been craving for, love and freedom… I wanna be there for you when you need it, be the first to celebrate your wins, be the first shoulder you cry on, be the first person to give you tips on things… Even if we can't be in a relationship, at least allow me to be your best friend, because no matter what I wanna be there for your moments of grief or joy. I don't wanna watch you get with someone who you do not feel anything for, but if I can even just do one thing to make you feel better, or get a smile out of you… I'll do it.”

Unknowing how to respond, you brought your hands to his back as you felt his long fingers trace along your thighs.

You felt some sense of reassurance as you brought yourself to slowly wrap your arms around his neck and give him a slow and wet kiss, the reality felt so unreal for a moment to the point that you didn't know if you were dreaming… you both lost track of time as you entered your own worlds with the simple help of lip to lip contact.

“I love you so much…”

“I love you too… but this can't happen- we can happen…”

Mingi looked at you slowly, giving you the softest eyes you had ever seen.

“It only takes once to find true love… I found it…” you heard him mumble as he landed a kiss on your temple.

“Stop doing this… you're making things harder for me… I'm trying to stay away from you but you just continue coming and looking at me with those eyes, talking to me with that voice… how many times do I have to tell you that this is wrong! This relationship between us can't happen!”

Tears began streaming down your cheeks, slowly hitting your lips and falling onto the concrete, Mingi's fingers slowly came up and caressed your cheek, bringing a kiss to your ear.

“If it can't happen today, I'll look for you in my next life… I'm sorry I couldn't help but in our next life I'll make you the happiest woman alive. I promise, I'll make you my wife in the future…"

"I promise…”

My Way

bodyguard!mingi x princess!reader

royal au

word count: 18k

genre and warnings: fluff, angst, suggestive, violence warning

synopsis: you, the princess of wonderland, have been betrothed to the prince of utopia for years now. however, the political relation between wonderland and utopia have never improved, and utopia keeps taking over wonderland's land unlawfully. with your guard mingi who is also your best friend and who you have feelings for, you travel to utopia with a plan to deceive the prince and steal official documents that would be proof of their treachery, risking your life in more than one way when you can't hold your feelings for your guard back anymore.

If you were honest with yourself, you really, really were not ready to meet your ‘betrothed’ especially at perilous times like these. 

It wasn’t because of what one would normally think- the obvious nervousness and anxiety that would come with going to meet your betrothed for the first time in 15 years, no. It wasn’t that at all. You couldn’t care less about the poor guy who was betrothed to you. 

Neither was it the nervousness of travelling alone (save for your guards) for the first time in a while. Rather, that part excited you quite a bit- you really needed a breather from the suffocating air of the castle. 

It was because of the threat hanging on your head while you embarked on this journey, and the secret mission you were going to carry out while in the castle of your betrothed. The future of your kingdom Wonderland depended on it. And for the next generations to live without the fear of war and collapse of their homeland, you’d risk getting caught by the neighbouring kingdom and perhaps, risk your life. 

But one person was adamant on making you realise that there were worse things than death-

“Imagine staying in a cell for the rest of your life.”

“At least I won’t witness the collapse of my nation,” you raised a brow as if having proven a point.

Your guard, Mingi, dressed rather comfortably for a guard as you always pointed out, shook his head, the ash tendrils shaking violently. “Imagine hearing from their guards about the horrid details.”

“Well,” you ruffled your dress before sitting down and pouring yourself water. “At least you’ll be with me.”

“Helpless, your Highness,” his raspy voice rang in your ears, “I’d rather die than be helpless while you endure whatever they decide to do with you.”

“Really?” Your eyes lit mischievously, “You’d rather die?”

Mingi finally scoffed, indicating he was relaxing and was going to get comfortable with you now, “Sad that I have to, isn’t it? If it were up to me, I’d deliver you to their cell myself.”

“For a guard who’s supposed to die for me,” you scoffed back, “you sure got some evil plans there.”

Mingi sighed, taking a seat in front of you. As your guard for more than 5 years, there was a certain familiarity between you two which consisted of unspoken actions that spoke louder than words and a sense of comfortableness with each other. He bit his lips as he tried to think of the words to say. “Are you sure we can’t let other guards in on this mission?”

“I don’t trust anyone else,” you said and Mingi felt a sense of pride in his heart at your words, “Plus, they’re all kind of… chickens.”

“What makes you think I’m not?” Mingi laughed, but when your eyes went to his neck, he got his answer. 

3 years ago when he had protected you from an arrow aimed for your head and it had grazed his neck. Everything between you two changed after that- you started trusting him indefinitely and acknowledged him, unlike the various other guards that had been or were in your service. As for Mingi, he simply told you it was his ‘job’ but he didn’t complain about the special treatment he’d started to get-

“Still hung up over that, are you?” He teased. 

Such as being something close to a ‘friend’ to you and talking comfortably. 

You shook your head and exhaled. “Let’s get to the point. This is going to be a very normal trip, Mingi. We go to Utopia, I spend time pretending I have ‘feelings’ for my betrothed and get the information I need, and if I’m lucky, physical proof of the plotting they’ve been doing. You do the protecting, as usual. As soon as I have something, we make our way back-”

“You think he won’t notice? He’ll at least notice when you leave like that. And then they’re going to send their assassins for you.”

“Good thing I’m not a spoiled princess who can’t take care of herself then,” you smirked. 

One of the unusual things about Mingi as a guard was that when he had first been appointed, he had insisted you get professional self-defence training for extreme times. You insisted that you had guards for a reason, trying to avoid anything that involved physical activity, but he had been hell bent on getting you trained.

And oh, was he serious. You came out of dresses and threw men around, and you loved it. You never wanted to wear dresses again and be a princess whose only role was to look pretty for the public. 

Mingi smiled at that. “Can’t believe you’d be happy about it one day. But that training…” his face became grim, “It won’t be enough to protect you for long.”

“Should be enough if it’s you and me, and we only need to get to the border to be safe. Their castle is close to the border so it shouldn’t be that big a problem.”

“What if you find nothing?” Mingi asked as he got up to leave, “Will you end up marrying the Prince then?”

Now that was one thing you hadn’t given much thought to- you’d been avoiding thinking about that. “Let’s just hope I abhor the Prince and don’t end up falling for him. Imagine that. Imagine me willingly staying in the nation who plans our collapse in the foreseeable future.”

Mingi scoffed, “I’d like to see that- not the collapse of Wonderland,” he corrected immediately, a smirk on his face as he continued, “but you putting someone else over your oh-so-mighty self.”

“You live to see my downfall, don’t you?” You threw a pen at his walking figure which missed by an inch. “I bet you’re going to retire as soon as that day comes.”

“Absolutely right,” he saluted, leaving and you shook your head, going back to planning.

Your betrothed- Kim Dohyun. The last you’d seen him was when you both had been kids and unaware of the arrangements your parents had been making. A union, they called it, when in reality, over the 15 years, it just allowed the Kims to take advantage of Wonderland however they pleased, not crossing the boundary but sure walking on the borderline. You simply could not take it anymore, and neither could your parents. They decided to make you visit Utopia in hopes of a love blossoming between you two and the situation cooling down. 

You were going to take this chance to find physical proof of the treachery that had only been building over the years. And in the process, you’d be becoming an enemy yourself- if they found out. 

—--------------------

It was going to take one week to get to the border and one more day to get to Prince Dohyun’s castle. You had been on the road for two days now, and you were already bored out of your mind and incredibly tired.

“Serves you right,” Mingi, who was inside the carriage with you now, resting because of his shift change, said. “This is what you signed up for, Princess. There’s no way you can get home after what you’re about to do.”

“Good thing I have you,” you smirked. “I hope your back is in a good state because you’re going to be carrying me back.”

“No way,” Mingi scoffed, running a hand through his hair but the slight curve of his lips told you he was amused. “Okay, suppose we manage to help each other and make it halfway and something happens to me. I die. You’re all alone. What are you going to do then?”

“Hmm,” you thought about it, resting your chin on your hand as you peeked outside, the forest a lush green in the afternoon sun. “Hide. Blend in and catch a ride?”

“Our accents give us away. No one’s gonna believe you’re a Utopian. You can’t ‘blend in’.”

“Oh, I’ll see when the time comes,” you waved a hand in dismissal, “Right now, I think I’m going to pass away before I reach the border.”

You, of course, didn’t. A few days later you were at the border, very alive, and Mingi gave you a look that told you he remembered what you’d said. You rolled your eyes, peeking out of the window but Mingi immediately grabbed your arm and pulled you away from the window. 

“How many times have I told you,” he sighed as he looked at you, “not to put your head out of any window?”

“Sorry,” you muttered sheepishly, “I just wanted to get a look at Utopia. It’s been 15 years.”

“Just…” he left your arm and you didn’t realise he had still been holding it. “Don’t do anything dangerously stupid.”

You poked his thigh, “People are going to think you actually care, Mingi.”

“Just telling you,” he said as he slumped back, “that if I was not your guard, I would definitely take up any job that put a fair price on your pretty little head.”

You put a hurt hand over your heart dramatically. “Good thing I’m a Princess then and have the power to execute you whenever I please. You’d think as a guard, you’d have more respect- what in the heavens is that?”

Mingi turned to see what caught your attention- it was a very eye-catching carriage that screamed royal. He frowned, wondering if the Prince was going to come out of the carriage- had he really travelled to the border to receive you?

Instead, a man dressed rather neatly jumped out, fixing his black hair. You wowed audibly, earning a scoff from Mingi. “If the Prince isn’t as handsome as him, I’m returning first thing tomorrow.”

Mingi got out of the carriage, greeting the man as he approached. He gave him a firm handshake. “I am Joohyuk, Prince Dohyun’s Captain of Guard. I came to receive our Princess on his behalf.”

You didn’t miss the possessive term he’d used and neither did Mingi. Mingi introduced himself and Joohyuk insisted you travel in their carriage where refreshments awaited. Mingi looked at you and you took a deep breath, getting out of the carriage and passing a curtsy. 

“Utopia smells wonderful- is it the lily trees?”

“Definitely. I suppose it’s a breath of fresh air after your long journey,” he said and you nodded. “I am the Captain of Guard- Joohyuk. Please address me comfortably.”

“I shall,” you nodded. “I hope the Prince is well.”

“He is well and awaits you,” Joohyuk pointed to the carriage. “I hope you’ll join us on the ride he sent.”

“I hope my guard can join with me,” you looked at Mingi sheepishly who nearly rolled his eyes but stopped because of the formal air. “He has a back issue- at his age!”

That was Mingi’s last straw. “Are you sure it’s not because you’ll feel awkward, Princess?”

Joohyuk chuckled, “I see you two get along.”

“We have to, for both our sakes,” you motioned Mingi to follow you and the three of you got inside the spacey carriage where indeed, tarts and cookies awaited. You gladly took a few and kicked Mingi in the foot, unnoticed, when he didn’t move to take some as well. 

You and Joohyuk conversed about the general affairs of Utopia and Wonderland on the way to the inn that he told you was used by the Prince whenever he travelled as well. As you reached the very modern looking inn by night time, you realised the Prince must have an eye for extravagant things. 

When Joohyuk excused himself after making sure you were comfortable in your room, Mingi stopped roaming around the room and took a seat in front of you as you kicked your shoes off. “He’s very talkative.”

“Which is good for us,” you looked at him as you massaged your feet, “The more he talks, the more I can wring out of him.”

“I never said he’s dumb,” Mingi smirked. “He’ll only tell you what he thinks you need to know.”

“A flutter of the lashes can wring out twice than that,” you did exactly that and Mingi swatted the air, apparently disgusted. You sighed, “Will you stay close tonight?”

“Next room,” Mingi pointed, “I won’t be sleeping, if that’s what you’re worried about… or should I?”

“I don’t know,” you took the hair pin out, letting your hair flow down. “You’re the guard.”

“I think I’ll scan the perimeter. I should leave you to rest now.”

“Do get some sleep,” you called as he opened the door to leave, “I don’t want you looking like a puffer fish tomorrow.”

Even though he didn’t get much sleep, he wasn’t the one looking like a puffer fish the next day.

“You look fine,” Mingi groaned as you nearly cried at your reflection in the mirror, “That’s enough icing- you’ll turn blue if you do more. That should be enough to charm any prince.”

“I’m not doing this to charm the Prince… though I suppose we could say that,” you grinned. “You think he’ll even look at me if I appear in this state?”

“Well,” Mingi stood behind you, in front of the mirror, “Let me do something about that.”

You dropped your hands and watched as Mingi loosened your half tied hair, letting a few strands frame your face from both sides. You were more focused on how well dressed he was as well- you hadn’t seen Mingi wear something other than black in years. Blue suited him.. 

“You look good. You shouldn’t look so good. Who are you trying to impress?”

“Maybe a few ladies at the castle,” he grinned, tying the rest of your hair, “Maybe the Prince. Who knows? Maybe the Prince and I could get along better than you two could ever.”

“Ha, ha,” you rolled your eyes and Mingi took a step back to let you see what he did. “Wow. This actually worked. Were you a hairstylist before a guard?”

“This is common sense, Princess,” he laughed, “Come on. Joohyuk must be getting nervous now.”

After a light breakfast with Joohyuk because he insisted a feast was prepared for you for lunch, you travelled the rest of the way in your own carriage, telling him you were representing Wonderland. As you reached the castle, the glassy structure much different from the vintage brick building you were used to living in, you realised the public wasn’t unaware of your arrival- several passersby waved at your carriages and you waved back, wondering for a moment if your arrival could be much more than the mission only you and Mingi knew about.

If you could, perhaps, sort things out without creating a mess and find a suitable life partner in Dohyun.

Because he certainly took your breath away with how striking he looked, and even Mingi snickered as if he could hear you think. It took you two a moment of scanning each other before he bowed and you curtsied. 

“Princess y/n,” he smiled, “It’s been too long.”

“It certainly has,” you smiled back, following him to the Great Hall, admiring the teals and browns along the way. “The castle is extraordinary- it has changed a lot from the last time I visited.”

"I hope it is to your liking, as well as… this feast," he smiled warmly at you as he motioned for you to sit. "Enjoy your meal."

As you dug in the delicacies of their region, you almost forgot Mingi who was sitting not far from you- not because the Prince had you in his spell, but because you were in a trance at how cheerful and talkative he was. It was easier for you this way because you didn't have to sit in awkward silence and think about a topic to converse over. You liked that he could lead the conversation.

"I used to eat 10 of these when I was a kid," Dohyun put a spoonful of chocolate pudding in his mouth.

"I can see why," you nearly scoffed but you were in love with the thing too. "I think I remember your father catching you in the corridor with pudding smeared all over your clothes."

"I don't know whether to be happy or embarrassed that you remember that," he chuckled and you looked at him- for a son of the nation that planned your downfall, he was quite something else. Could this all be an act, or did he genuinely not know anything about the fragile political situation between your kingdoms?

You got the answer to that when he accompanied you to the royal chambers where a whole chamber was for you. "I hope we can put politics aside and get to know each other well, Princess," Dohyun's voice was low and you paused with a raised brow as you looked at him. "I know things haven't been the best but… we could be a means to end this, couldn't we?"

You wondered if he was behaving well so this arrangement could resolve the conflict or if he was genuinely interested in you- you as an individual. You nodded slowly, "I travelled here for a reason, Prince. And so far… I haven't been disappointed at all."

Dohyun smiled after you, nodding as he waved goodnight and left you two in your chamber. You immediately slumped as the door shut and massaged your forehead as you sat down on the couch. You ignored the sounds of disappointment Mingi made. "You two should really become actors. That was quite something back there."

You opened one eye to glare at him sitting in front of you. “Let’s not forget the real reason we’re here, Mingi. The King and Queen were absent throughout the day. Do you think this means they aren’t interested in this arrangement anymore?”

“I mean… considering they were in the castle but too busy to meet you… probably. But Prince Dohyun is playing a diplomat. What’s your plan?”

“I think I should take two or three days to feel him out. Let’s see if he really is interested in peace or not,” you pursed your lips as you recalled what he’d said before he’d left. “He’s quite handsome though, isn’t he? It’ll be a shame if this arrangement was for nothing after all.”

Mingi shook his head, “I knew this was all it was gonna take for you to have second thoughts-”

You threw the nearest thing you could grab which happened to be a small box with something inside and Mingi expertly caught it without flinching, smug. He shuffled the box, frowning as he opened it and his face lit up. “Chocolates!”

“Now, now, hand me that,” you waved your hand but he, out of routine, took one and sniffed it before eating.

“There you go,” he threw the box back at you and your heart warmed at how he always took the first bite out of whatever you were to eat when your maid wasn’t around to check for poison. You made sure he got your look of gratitude before you picked a chocolate and sighed at how scrumptious it was. 

“Suppose this really is a ruse,” you said after a moment. “I need physical proof. You have two to three days to get an idea of the layout of the castle. I’ll figure out where such documents would be hidden.”

The next three days were the most interesting days of your life so far- only because it had been quite boring with your mechanical routine back in your castle. You supposed it would only get more interesting from here and you weren’t sure if it was a good thing or a bad thing.

But so far, so very good. Dohyun lived up to his apparent charms as he showed you around the castle, talked to you about politics or hobbies- you learned that he liked to play the piano and he promised to play it for you soon. You met the King and the Queen who apologised for being ‘busy’ earlier. A dinner together revealed that the King and Queen were, after all, not interested in this arrangement anymore, though they never said it out loud. You just had to thank your intuition for that. They were more interested in gaining leverage over their neighbouring kingdoms and sadly, yours was one of them.

Dohyun, however, was proving to be difficult to decipher. When in the presence of his parents, he would become someone else and agree with everything they had to say. But when it was only you two, he would say something that would contradict his earlier statements. You really were confused, and Mingi suggested you become his ‘friend’ so he could really open up to you.

You did that on your third night here, when you two were in the gardens. You asked Dohyun if he had ever fallen in love with someone.

Dohyun looked at you, “Was I supposed to?”

You smiled at him. “I know there’s an arrangement between us, Dohyun, but really, we were strangers until three days ago. And we are both young. I wouldn’t blame you if you did.”

“Have you?” He shifted towards you.

You sighed, “I didn’t, but if I have to admit, I was open for an opportunity. I just didn’t meet someone I clicked with.”

“I understand,” Dohyun sighed, “You’re right. It would be crazy if we didn’t even look at someone else, right?”

“Exactly what I mean,” you nodded. 

“I haven’t been a saint in that case- but I haven’t gone that far, don’t worry-”

You laughed out loud and he ended up laughing too. You shook your head, “I’m not going to judge you if you have! I’m hoping we can be friends, at least, Dohyun. I’m hoping you can talk to me about anything, even if this arrangement doesn’t meet its conclusion.”

Dohyun put a hand over yours, caressing it and you raised a brow in anticipation. “I know what you mean. You’re here for a month, right?” You nodded and he continued, “Let’s be friends. Let’s be unbiased with each other and if nothing else comes out, I hope we can end things on a good note.”

“Thank you, Dohyun,” you squeezed his hand, “Truly. But…” you caressed his hand, “I’m open to finding my life partner in you, Dohyun. Are you?”

Dohyun smiled teasingly as he nodded and you stifled your own smile as you looked down, ignoring the twinge of guilt in your heart because this wasn’t the entire truth, after all. As if reflexively, you peeked behind you to make sure Mingi was there, and like always, he was there, not far from you two, monitoring you. A constant pillar of strength. He passed a smile that said ‘you’re doing good’ and you sighed in relief internally. 

—----------------

“I have mapped out every known exit in the castle,” Mingi was making a rough sketch on the paper as he addressed you, who were currently polishing her fingernails. “I just need to check for hidden passages.”

“Are you losing your touch?” You teased, “I don’t remember you being slow, Mr. Song.”

“I don’t remember you ever paying attention to how much your nails gleamed but I’m not complaining, Princess.”

You deadpan stared at him and he stared back until his eyes curved as he smiled widely, bursting into laughter and you shook your head. “You really can’t win a staring competition. I wonder how long it takes for you to break apart when you stare at your enemies. And as for the nails… I plan to seduce our Prince.”

“Seduce?” Mingi scoffed, “You? I’m sorry if I’m crossing a line when I say this but I don’t think seduction is your forte, Princess.”

Mingi was really getting on your nerve now and you stopped rubbing your nails as you paid full attention to him. “What makes you think so?”

“I’ve been monitoring you for five years now, in case you forgot,” Mingi went back to making the layout of the castle, “I don’t recall you ever even trying.”

“That means you don’t know yet,” you smiled victoriously, “I just haven’t had the opportunity to try that on someone.”

“Thank goodness you haven’t, because I don’t think I could have stomached the sight of it.”

You sighed as you continued to stare at Mingi, wondering how you’d come here. You let your guard say such blunt things to you, something no guard in the history of Wonderland would have dared to, and yet… you liked it because Mingi wasn’t just your guard. He was your friend. If he hadn’t been your friend and had said such things…

“You look like you want to kill me.”

“I do,” you scoffed, “Just wondering why I let you of all the people in this world talk like that to me.”

“Aw, do you want to execute me for the disrespect?” Mingi made a sad face.

“See?” You threw your hands in the air, the two of you laughing, “I’m both hurt and glad that I have you as my guard and as my friend. I hope you do know that despite everything, I really wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Mingi narrowed his eyes at you, “You’re quite sentimental today.”

“I am,” you smiled, “I also want you to know that your presence comforts me wherever I am. You’re like… a pillar. Pun intended.”

“Carry on,” Mingi said, clearly enjoying it.

“I’m glad for all that I’ve learned from you-”

“Okay, hold up,” Mingi put his pencil down and dragged his seat in front of you, “What do you want?”

You considered not telling him but then you sighed. “I want you to leave me alone when I seduce him.”

“Not a chance,” Mingi shook his head, “I don’t trust him yet.”

“And how long is it gonna take for you to trust him?” You scoffed, “Mingi, this is about protecting my home. I think we both can take a little risk-”

“I cannot,” Mingi shook his head furiously, “I simply can not.”

“Mingi,” you sighed, “It’s not like I’m doing anything weird! I’m not gonna go that far. I only aim to get him a bit comfortable-”

“As your guard, I cannot allow this,” Mingi’s eyes were the most serious you’d seen. “He is in a position where he can harm you. He is not yours officially yet, so as a guard, my job is to hold him back if he tries to harm you. Do you know how badly that could end?”

You knew what he meant- if he interfered, which was his job, it could ruin anything that could start between you and Dohyun. It could be the beginning of the end. You cleared your throat, straightening, “I understand that this is your job. I’ll let you accompany me for a while but when things escalate, I need you to give me privacy, Mingi. This is an order as a Princess.”

“Only if I trust him not to harm you.”

You groaned, “You’re never going to!”

“Yeah, maybe I am not!” Mingi’s voice rose and he got up, “I cannot take this risk, why don’t you understand that?”

“I’ll take responsibility if anything happens-” you stopped when you saw the hurt flash across his eyes and you frowned in confusion.

“You’re never going to understand. I’m not saying this as your guard anymore,” his voice was low and he looked like he was about to take a step forward but then he stopped. “I, as your friend or whatever… I don’t allow this.”

With that, he left, leaving your hand extended in the air about to stop him but you let him go, wondering if he needed to clear his head and think alone, scoffing because now you needed to do the same too. Because… 

You’d never seen Mingi so frustrated. And the way he looked at you…

You shook your head, ridding yourself of stupid thoughts as you started memorizing the layout.

—---------------

"If we get caught," you whispered as you glared at Mingi, "It's going to be the end of us."

"Stop being so dramatic, nobody's getting caught," Mingi gripped your arm tighter. "Besides, if anyone does see us… they won't be walking out of here alive."

"Ooh," you smirked. "That's both scary and-"

You nearly screamed yourself when Mingi jumped, a low squeal coming from his mouth as he hid behind you. You scoffed at the tiny bug that stood- probably scared as well- in front of you.

"I can't believe I'm exploring a secret passage inside the castle of my potential enemy with my guard who is scared of bugs."

"Everyone is scared of something," Mingi muttered, unmoving. "Now do something about it."

You rolled your eyes so hard your head hurt. Handing your torch to Mingi, you bent down and flicked the bug away, clearing the passage for your guard. He bowed in thanks as he took the lead again. You shook your head. "Imagine the enemy has a dagger to my throat. You aim to free me by throwing your own dagger at my captor. But because of a mere bug, you miss, and I die. Imagine getting executed because of a bug, Mingi."

"I'm not always scared," Mingi pouted and you smiled at the adorableness of it, smacking his arm playfully. "We're here- this path leads to the Prince's chamber and this one to the exit."

You were at a fork now and you folded your arms as you calculated how long it took to get here from your room. "2 minutes. That's shorter than the time it actually takes."

"We don't know if the guards or the others know about this passage yet so we should leave without further delay," Mingi pointed to a lit torch not far away towards the exit. "Probably a few people know of this place. Let's blow ours out- you memorised the path, didn't you?"

"I did," you nodded, fixing the torch in an empty stand. "Let's move."

The two of you were moving as silently as you two could, until you reached another divergence and heard faint voices. Before you could do anything, Mingi had you by your arm, nearly slamming you on the wall in the nearest opening so that you two would be hidden unless someone came your way. With a hand on your mouth and a 'shh' in your ear, he got a nod from you and you reflexively held onto his shirt.

The faint voices grew and light filled gradually, allowing you to realise just how close your guard was, his eyes fixed on his hand on your mouth, the other hand resting on your waist. And maybe because it was the dim lights that you scanned his face properly for the first time in a while, taking in the mole under his eye, his sharp nose, his sharp eyes that could be the warmest that you'd ever known within the span of seconds, his thick, plump lips-

He licked them.

Your heart sank to your feet because gosh, he was hot. Unreasonably, undeniably hot and it was a shame that he was only your guard-

As the voices grew louder, he shifted so your bodies were touching and he locked eyes with you. You could see the apology in his eyes but also…

Mischief. No regrets. Or were you reading too much into it? You couldn't tell because you were currently preoccupied by the sensation that coursed through your body at the closeness between you two, and you felt a sudden twinge of guilt because this wasn't the first time you'd felt it.

As Mingi drew back and his absence hit, you reminded yourself that he was only doing his job as your guard. He probably thought of you as a bratty Princess, nothing more. You looked at him, finding it hard to maintain eye contact and Mingi sighed.

"Sorry for that- I wasn't expecting company."

"It's… okay. Not your fault," you whispered back, putting your hand back on his arm and urging him to move and this time you two were quicker and made your way out to your chamber. He hid the entrance with the tapestry that hung and you shook your head. "How did you even figure this out?"

"I may have 'accidentally' slammed myself across this tapestry while avoiding a goddamn bug," Mingi said and you grinned. "I noticed the sound."

"You do realise that if the Prince is aware of this secret path, he could very well enter here anytime? Or send someone?"

"Which is why this," Mingi motioned to the sitting area, "is to be my bedroom now."

"I've been hearing you snore for days now, Mingi," you raised a brow. "You sure you can even hear anyone entering over the sound of your snoring?"

Mingi raised a brow back, "You're lying."

You grinned, slumping on the couch, "I was. I just wanted to check if you're actually doing your duty-"

"I'm the Head of the Guards, you think I'm not aware of my surroundings when I sleep?" 

You laughed at how it looked like he was genuinely hurt that you could think otherwise. "Of course I do, I'm just playing with you," you shook your head in amusement. "Do you think I should sneak up to the Prince's room and give him a surprise?"

Mingi scoffed as he slumped down beside you, massaging his temples. "Go ahead. His guard would probably kill you before he could see you."

"I should practise sneaking up on you," you said casually.

You were serious. One night later, when you couldn't sleep, you didn't even bother picking up your candle since the moonlight was enough and you sneaked out through your room, not making a sound, thanks to Mingi's lessons. You paused in front of Mingi's slightly ajar door- you had to practically fight-argue with him to stop him from sleeping on the couch and to just sleep in his own bed- no one was going to dare creep up on you two. He instead opted on setting a trap at the entrance of the passage beneath the tapestry and slept with his door open.

Which led you to sneak in inside, snickering silently when you saw Mingi sleeping rather peacefully, mouth slightly parted. You walked to the window, finding a little moth sleeping peacefully as well. You picked it up, nearly giggling as you silently treaded to where Mingi was asleep-

He looked really handsome even when asleep.

You couldn't help but compare the dynamic you had with him to the one you had with Dohyun, which, currently, wasn't much. Dohyun was, as a human, nice. Friendly. Caring, even. But…

He wasn't Mingi.

You bit your lip as you tried to stop the longing that coursed through you, recalling the first time when you had looked at Mingi differently- you had sneaked up on him exactly like this as a revenge for all the harsh training he was making you do. You didn't like how strict and serious a mentor he was because you were naturally mischievous even in serious times. So you made the mistake of sneaking up on him when he was asleep and he nearly killed you-

"How long are you going to stand and stare-"

"Goodness gracious," you came out of memory lane, putting a hand over your heart, your eyes wide. "Were you awake?"

"I wasn't but I heard the sound of your footsteps."

"I didn't make a sound."

"I recognised it anyway," Mingi shifted in his position a bit. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"Exactly what you think. And I wasn't staring at you, I was just wondering if you were going to try and kill me like last time."

Mingi shook with laughter as he recalled that time- he had been sleeping on the floor at that time for a quick nap and when you got near, he basically slammed you down on the ground and had a dagger positioned at your throat, which scared the living soul out of you. 

What he didn't know was that something about the way he had looked at you when he recognised you had shifted your heart and you never looked at him the same again.

"You want me to do that to you again?" Mingi scoffed, "because you're asking for it at this point, really."

"No, thanks," you pursed your lips. "I'm good. I do have this for you-"

Mingi swatted your hand and the moth went flying away and you pouted. He stared at you for a minute before he raised a brow because you were still standing and he didn't know what you wanted. "You wanna sit down, Princess?"

Your eyes involuntarily fell to the space beside him on the edge of the bed and he scooted away so you could sit. You did so, one knee up and you sighed, "I couldn't sleep. I'm just… nervous about tomorrow."

"It's just a date," Mingi said but something about his tone was restrictive. "It's your chance to feel him out. He is your betrothed- you really need to see if there is a future with him after all."

"I can't believe you're the one saying this," you muttered and he frowned in confusion. "I just… What if everything is politically fine and we don't have to go with the mission even, but I don't… feel a spark for him? What if I don't want to marry him, Mingi?"

Mingi's heart clenched at the way your voice came to be barely a whisper as you said his name. He gulped. "I'm not the one you should be talking to about this-"

"You are the only one I can talk about this to," you made sure your eyes conveyed your trust as you said this. "I could never say this out loud to someone else, and you know that."

Mingi sighed, putting an arm under his head so he could look at you better, still lying down. "I'm only a guard. Okay, maybe a friend too. So as a friend… talk to your parents?"

"They'll never allow this," you practically spat as you said, "They always disapprove of everything I do. You know that all too well."

He did. They were against the training Mingi had you take but he had convinced them, emphasizing the need for self-defence thanks to the history of assassinations and murders that met your ancestors. They also disapproved that you were friendly with Mingi but his professional attitude made them dismiss that. 

His professional attitude and your stubbornness to not cooperate with any other guard. But he did not know that.

"Why do you think you won't like him, if everything else is okay?" Mingi asked, wondering if he should be having such a private conversation with a Princess, but then again… you never made him feel like a mere guard.

"I don't wish to stay beside someone I don't love. I could miss the chance of being happy for the rest of my life because of one wrong decision."

"But decisions like these… you never really know if you're right until you're halfway there, isn't it?"

You smiled at that. He was right. You stared at him, wondering if he could see what you felt for him in your eyes. If he did… 

Was he ignorant or dismissing it on purpose? And if it was the latter, did it mean he didn't return the feelings?

"You look like you're about to cry, and I cannot have that."

You laughed, looking up as you stifled the tears. You felt Mingi scoot a bit and he touched your hand hesitantly but you snaked your fingers in his. He squeezed it reassuringly. "I'm by your side, Princess. Don't be scared."

You nodded, looking at your intertwined hands and staring at them for the longest time as flashes of what could be a happy future with Mingi ran across your eyes. You looked at him, nearly asleep, and you took that chance to kiss his hand, making him look at you with surprise.

"You're everything I need Mingi. And everything I'll ever need. Thank you for being the way that you are."

Before he could respond, you let go of his hand and went to your room, leaving him wondering just what you meant. 

—---------------

Dohyun proved to be a good person throughout your day, his manners very much like a gentleman, and you liked that he could make you laugh. He showed you around town, making sure you were comfortable, buying you anything that caught your attention, and even treating you to the town’s best desserts.

“I have to admit, you have quite a sense of humour,” Dohyun said as he finished eating his vanilla ice-cream. “You don’t let me breathe.”

“That means I’m doing a great job,” you smiled, finishing your own chocolate flavoured ice-cream as well. “I also have to admit that your reputation precedes you.”

“How so?” Dohyun was curious, running a hand through his dark hair before resting his chin on his hands.

“You know,” you shrugged, “I’ve heard things about you. You’re better than what I heard.”

“And what does that mean for me?” Dohyun wiggled his brows flirtatiously.

“Well,” you leaned forward, scanning his face, “Maybe this princess would have to consider you properly after all… But as a prince, don’t you have something you’d use to woo me? Like… a winning strike?”

“Ah, I see how it is,” Dohyun laughed, understanding that you were both serious and pulling his leg at the same time- he liked that about you. “We’ll have to be back at the castle for that. Piano does the trick usually. But… what’s your winning strike, Princess?”

“Hmm, let’s see,” you pouted as you thought about it, “Do I even need one?”

“That’s not fair!” Dohyun shook his head and you laughed.

“Well, you have to blame my lack of experience in that department.”

“You make it sound like I spent all my years practising how to win- or rather, ‘woo’ people.”

“I imagine that you did, Prince,” you teased. “After all, with someone who looks like you… it’d be a shame if you weren’t a professional in that department.”

“Ah,” Dohyun sat back. “Sometimes I can’t tell if you’re serious or not.”

“And that’s what’s so fun about chatting with me,” you got up. “Shall we?”

The two of you rode back to the castle, where Dohyun opened up about some embarrassing incidents from the past with women. You learned that he wasn’t always good at interacting which led to awkward circumstances, such as a few ladies making advances, not knowing he was ‘betrothed’, and then never showing themselves again when they learned.

“But it’s not like we were engaged,” you frowned. “Our parents just thought it would be a good idea and gave us the chance to see if we feel so too, didn’t they?”

“Yeah, but people tend to think it’s more romantic than that,” Dohyun sighed. “Don’t you think they made a mistake announcing that publicly? It may have driven off our chances at something better.”

“I agree that there is a possibility of that, and also a possibility that this was a good decision after all. I guess we’ll know as time passes by. Can I trust you to tell me if you feel like I’m not the one for you? I wouldn’t want you to marry me under… pressure.”

Dohyun nodded, understanding. “But… you have to admit there’s a factor of pressure holding us down as well, no matter how miniscule it is. It changes how we think of each other.”

He was right. You nodded slowly, wondering if this was a good time to learn how he thought of you as a rival kingdom’s daughter. “Suppose there was no agreement between us, and I came to smoothen things up between our kingdoms. What do you think would have happened?”

Dohyun fell silent for a moment, and you knew whatever came out of his mouth wouldn’t be entirely true then. “I think we would still get along like we do now. But… I would, of course, have to put my kingdom first before any sort of relationship, just like you would do.”

“That’s right,” you nodded. “Are we still putting our kingdom first, Dohyun?”

“Isn’t that why you’re here in the first place?” He smiled, “We’re here.”

After freshening up in your own rooms, he gave you the promised tour of the library. You wowed as you entered the grand room, numerous shelves lining the walls, ample space to sit and study. “Do you come here often?”

“Not as much as I used to,” Dohyun sighed. 

“I suppose you know your history,” you asked and he nodded. “Are history books truly different in every kingdom?”

“Everyone has created their own version of the past,” Dohyun said, guiding you to the shelf which contained the history of how the kingdoms of Wonderland, Utopia, and other nations that were once one broke apart. “I suppose history is the people, and people tend to be biased.”

“I agree,” you said, “I happened to read the history books of Eden and Halaland. Their versions were quite different from ours.”

“Nobody would paint themselves as the enemy now, would they?” He looked at you and you shrugged in agreement. “To their people, everyone is the hero.”

“But as rulers, we have to be unbiased and objective. Facts before anything else.”

“And what are your facts?” Dohyun smiled as he asked. “Are you sure your facts are correct?”

“Let’s see…” you smiled, “Would you like to have a battle of facts?”

The two of you ended up discussing the history of independence, finding out it was pretty much the same for both of you. You started leaning towards the relationship between Wonderland and Utopia, since this was probably the only chance you’d get and learning how he thinks and makes decisions.The two of you promised each other it won’t affect your judgement of each other- after all, you two were only sharing what you’d learned from your ancestors.

It ended up in a heated argument nonetheless. You scoffed as you almost glared at him. “Trade. How many times precious cargo from Wonderland has ‘gone missing’ on the way to Eden?”

“Are you implying Utopia has something to do with it?” Dohyun raised a brow.

“I mean,” you passed him a smug look, “It only goes missing when we take the shortcut- from Wonderland to Utopia to Eden. But whenever we go around Utopia- Halaland, Mist Island, and then Eden, though the journey takes twice as long, there hasn’t been one instance where the cargo vanished.”

“And why do you think Utopia has something to do with that?” Dohyun smirked. “It could be your people smuggling things here.”

“In which case, both of us would be to blame, wouldn’t it?” You challenged and you two stared at each other before he gave in, chuckling.

“Fair enough,” he clapped once. “While we’re on this topic, I do have something I should address too. The border situation in the North.”

“Sensitive topic,” you smiled but nodded. “What do you think?”

“What I know is that the people of Wonderland in the north love to aggravate the temper of Utopians.”

“And what I know is that Utopians are planning and slowly taking over the North.” You looked at him and noticed how he didn’t flinch.

“What makes you people think so?”

“Apart from the fact that we already lost a chunk of land to Utopia?” You challenged.

“If we truly ‘took’ it, wouldn’t we have declared it our territory officially?”

“It could be a part of your plan,” you said and Dohyun gaped at you, making you break the tense atmosphere and laugh in dismissal. “I’m just saying! You’d think so too if you were in my shoes. And I’m only saying what I know- doesn’t mean it’s necessarily the truth.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, relaxing as he sighed. “I’m also… only stating what I know. Of course, I haven’t witnessed the situation myself so I’m dependent on the people who provide me the information.”

“They could always be lying,” you told him, “We should never fully trust the people who provide us the information.”

“Wise words,” Dohyun smiled. “I should keep that in mind. This was… fun, actually. You’d make a great leader, Princess.”

“And so would you,” you smiled, struggling to make it reach your eyes. “You’ve made it so much easier for me to make my decision regarding you now.”

“Oh? And what would that be?” Dohyun’s eyes lit up.

“Well…” you passed a flirtatious smile, “I think I should really hear you play the piano before I tell you.”

He laughed, getting up and offering you his arm which you took, following him to the room attached to the library where several musical instruments were placed and it looked like someone played them regularly. You smiled. “It’s a nice idea to have music playing near the library.”

“The one thing I really like about the castle,” Dohyun nodded, going to sit in front of the piano and checking the keys while you walked around, your hands sweating.

You had made your decision. 

It was going to be extremely difficult to live with Dohyun when he truly believed Utopia could never be at fault. You knew now that marrying him would change nothing of the political situation between your kingdoms- it would only give Utopia even more leverage. So you would really have to carry on with your mission now.

And everything following this moment depended on you making Dohyun believe you were truly in love with him. You would have to tread carefully from now on, and somehow get access to his chamber where he must be keeping the documents regarding the border since he was in charge of the situation there.

“I’m ready when you are,” Dohyun called and you urged him to start, going to stand beside him. 

But despite everything, you had to admit he certainly was charming. The way he played the piano was beautiful, and you gently sat down beside him, resting your head on his shoulder as he played something beautiful that made you calm. 

It was truly a shame that Dohyun had to be the enemy’s son.

As he played, you thought about Mingi. The joy in your life. Your guard. If you, a Princess, got in a relationship with your guard… if anyone learned of that back in your home, you knew Mingi wouldn’t be spared. You wouldn’t be spared as well. 

Tears threatened to spill from your eyes as the haunting melody played in your head. When you decided to visit Utopia, you truly wanted to forget about Mingi and consider Dohyun, but coming here only strengthened the feelings you had for your guard. Perhaps, he liked you too, but you knew he had way better control than you had. Could you truly not be with him? What rule said that you could not be with a man who happened to be your guard as well? What better partner than someone who would willingly give his life for you, who cared for you more than his own self?

Dohyun stopped playing and he rubbed your back when he saw your glazed eyes. You pretended that it was for him. You wiped your eyes. “You played beautifully.”

It was the truth. He did not need to know that his beautiful playing evoked memories of another man. Dohyun smiled, tucking your hair behind your ears. You were suddenly glad that Mingi wasn’t here because you were sure your eyes would have betrayed you if you looked at him now. 

“You’re beautiful, you know that?” Dohyun almost whispered, caressing your cheek. You suddenly felt your heart tighten with panic as he drew closer and closer-

You bit your lip to stop the sigh of relief when you heard a knock- truly a god-sent miracle as Dohyun, disappointed, pulled back and cleared his throat. It was Joohyuk. “You’re needed in the courtroom. Right now.”

Dohyun nodded and you two got up. “Thank you for a wonderful time, Dohyun. I’ll never forget today.”

Dohyun kissed your hand before following Joohyuk, taking you with him until you parted ways in the corridor. You made your way back, escorted by his guard, holding back your tears as you entered your chamber-

And there sat Mingi, sharpening his daggers. You sighed in relief when you saw him but you knew it was a bad time. Mingi saw your glazed eyes and put his daggers down. “Are you okay? Did he say something to you?”

“I’m… okay, he didn’t say anything,” you took a deep breath. “I just… need to be alone right now.”

He saw the tears spill before you went to your room, and you slumped down on the floor as you cried. Mingi knocked on your door, asking you to find him if you wanted to talk. It only made you cry harder, and then you hastily wiped your eyes as anger consumed you.

You’d go back to your home. You’d break all the rules that said you couldn’t be with someone not of your status. You’d change the law if there was one about this, though to your knowledge, there wasn’t actually a law, but since you were considered to be someone else’s betrothed, you were bound now. Being with Mingi now would only put a threat on his life, but you’d protect him with yours.

You just needed to see if Mingi felt the same way about you. Because if he didn’t…

You’d never be whole again.

—------------

That night, you told Mingi everything that happened between you and Dohyun, now in a better mood since you had a plan. 

“So, with a heavy heart, I regret to inform you that we need to carry on with our life-threatening mission of me finding access to his chamber, which is definitely where he hid those documents that will give us the proof to save Wonderland. And what better way to access a man’s chamber than to-”

“You’re not doing that to yourself,” Mingi shook his head.

“It’s okay, Mingi,” you sighed. “Dohyun, as a person, isn’t all that bad. He won’t do anything that crosses the line.”

“But what is your plan? What happens after… he takes you there?”

You grinned. “Remember that trick you learned from the magician that came with the circus two years ago? That fire trick?”

“Don’t tell me you’re setting the Prince on fire.”

“Of course not,” you slapped Mingi’s arm. “I’m setting his room on fire.”

“Unbelievable,” Mingi shook his head, looking despaired. “Why?”

“When there’s a fire, dear old guard,” you smiled, “Our eyes immediately move to our dearest possession. I don’t think his dearest possession is me yet, so he’ll naturally look in the direction of whatever box or safe he keeps. After that… we wait for him to go on one of his tours so we take this passage to his room and voila.”

Mingi stared at you, arms folded. “I have to admit that the plan is quite genius,” you smiled victoriously at that, “but very risky. You’ll need to practise that trick. Not everyone can get the hang of that, but considering you’re good with cards already…”

“See?” you flipped your hair, “I have it all planned out.”

Mingi got up, showing you how the trick worked. It involved a single card dipped in a very flammable potion, and a little friction would spark it. You’d only have to hide the card in your sleeve and rub it across the rough part of Dohyun’s clothes and throw it on the nearest fabric. The card would turn to soot and disappear in a second, leaving you completely innocent. No one would suspect anything or anyone- not a mere princess, at least.

Because no one knew that you were trained as good as any soldier. To everyone else but Mingi, you were only a spoiled royal who knew nothing except how to look pretty and how to play politics, like every other princess.

A few hours later, you mastered the trick. The only thing left now was to practise igniting it on your partner’s clothes.

“So I’m going to obviously have to, um…” you pursed your lips, “do… things to the Prince and let him do things to me-”

“Shut up,” Mingi put a hand over his ears, his laugh not quite as hearty as it usually was.

“Can we pretend to be in a…” you tried to find the right word as you struggled with motioning with your hands, “compromising? position- so I can practise- oh, bloody hell, let’s just get this done with.”

You threw your hands in the air as you took Mingi’s hands and put them on your waist, making him utterly surprised and you put your hands on his shoulder, locking eyes with him. “Just like we’re dancing, yeah?”

With much struggle, because you had no idea what Mingi felt right now, he nodded, his hands resting on your hips and bringing you closer. “Let’s be professional about this.”

You raised a brow at how his voice was raspier now, nodding and snaking your hands behind his neck. “You’re too tall. Bend down a little- Dohyun’s height.”

Mingi did and you rubbed the card on his collar, the card catching fire and you immediately blew it. “This works! Does it smell?”

“No- the potion makes sure you can’t smell anything until it spreads,” Mingi said, stepping back away from you. “Are you sure you can do this?”

“Well,” you gulped, deciding to risk everything now. “I’ll need to kiss him.”

Mingi groaned at the unnecessary revelation. “And? You seem to have no problem with that.”

“I do have one,” you stifled your smile as you looked at him. “I don’t know how to kiss.”

“Ugh, why am I your guard again? I don’t need to know that! I’m supposed to be protecting you, not listening to your lack of experience!”

You laughed at how flustered he was. “For a guard, you sure have quite a few things to say to me, eh?”

Mingi looked at you- he knew he was to blame too. He never realised when exactly you two became so comfortable with each other, when you started sharing personal things with him, when he started telling you about himself… he was only supposed to protect you but he had ended up becoming your friend, which he knew was highly unprofessional. 

“I have a serious problem here, Mingi,” you said, putting your hands over your hips, “This plan won’t work if I can’t even kiss him properly.”

“So what’s your next plan?”

“I don’t have another plan,” you said quietly, your heart beating rapidly now. “I need you to teach me how to kiss.”

“Say that again?” Mingi frowned, wondering if he heard it wrong. You exhaled, locking eyes with him.

“I need you…. To teach me how to kiss.”

Mingi gaped at you. “You’re not serious.”

“I am,” you said through clenched teeth. “Be professional about this. Everything depends on this single plan, which is the only possible route I see. Everything depends on how I perform… all this. If I can’t do it properly, Wonderland could fall.”

“Wonderland could fall if you don’t know how to kiss someone properly?” Mingi scoffed.

“Mingi. Think about it.”

Mingi did, and realised you were right. “Well.. you know, I don’t have to teach you. It just… happens. You’d be good, don’t worry.”

“Mingi.”

Mingi groaned, his ears red, “I can’t do this, Princess. I cannot touch you. I am your guard. I would be executed if anyone learns of this- nevermind me, you’d have to face worse things than a mere execution if anyone learns you’re doing such things with a mere guard-”

“But you are not a mere guard to me,” you took his hand. “Never think that you are only a guard to me. You are… much more. If I tell you what you mean to me, you’d resign first thing, Mingi.”

Mingi sighed at that, squeezing your hand. “This shouldn’t be happening.”

“Who said that?” You tilted your head, smiling. “And besides… nothing would happen if no one would learn. We’re not in Wonderland, Mingi.”

Mingi looked like he was considering but then he broke apart, turning away from you and running his hands through his hair, his body tense. “What do you want me to do?”

“I want you to kiss me.”

Mingi groaned loudly. “I can’t do that.”

“Why?”

“Because nothing about this would be professional, because I…” he paused and a spark of hope formed in your heart.

“Go on.”

“I can’t kiss you and go back to pretending to be only your guard.”

You sighed at how it came only as a whisper. You stepped closer to him, wrapping your arms around his waist, resting your head on his back. “The things I feel for you, Mingi… if you learned you’d run away from me.”

He sighed, looking down, his head blank. He put his hands over yours, attempting to break them but you weren’t having any of it. 

“Tell me you don’t feel something for me, and I’ll let you go.”

“I can’t lie.”

You sighed in relief. “Then kiss me.”

“I can’t.” He almost cried. “I can’t touch you if I can’t have you.”

“You already have me, my dear warrior,” you smiled. “I was only ever yours.”

Mingi pulled your hands away, walking away from you. “This is a bad idea. Think about the consequences for once.”

“Damn the consequences,” you seethed. “This is an order, Mingi. I want you to kiss me like you mean it-”

It took him only a second to turn and hold your face in his hands as his lips found yours, swallowing the groan of surprise that left you. He kissed you repeatedly until you kissed back and it was the most natural thing you’d ever experienced, the feel of his plump lips indescribable. Your legs were weak and you held in to the back of his neck, your kisses turning more heated and frantic until you both broke apart for breath.

You were smiling- you were the happiest you’d ever been. And Mingi… he looked the most content as he brushed his nose with yours, picking you effortlessly by the waist and placing you on the table so you met his height. He looked at you, unguarded for once and you saw everything you needed in his eyes. 

“Don’t ever give me an order like this again,” he whispered.

“I’m sorry,” you giggled. “I had to do something.”

He shook his head and you caressed his face lovingly, smiling at the feel of his soft ash hair that you drew back. His hands rested on your waist, sending sparks through you and you continued to look at him, memorising his face. You pecked his nose, making him grin, then you kissed the mole on his cheek, under his eye, that you adored. You joined your foreheads. “Let’s run away, Mingi. I can’t live if I can’t have you.”

“We’ll figure it out,” he promised, pecking your lips. “So… was that enough to learn how to kiss?”

You grinned at his teasing tone. “I don’t think so.”

Mingi scoffed before he kissed you again, this time softly, like a first kiss, experimentally moving his lips against yours and you followed his lead, moaning into the kiss repeatedly until he couldn’t take it anymore- especially when you wrapped your legs around him. The kisses picked pace and force as he pushed you back until your back curved and you fell flat on the table. His hands travelled along your curves and yours played with his hair. You managed to earn a few satisfying moans as well, and he finally broke apart.

“Shall we take this to bed?” You managed to say and he shook his head, amused.

“I won’t be able to stop if I take you to bed,” his voice was incredibly low and rough as he whispered in your ear, trailing kisses down your jaw. “This… is enough. For now.”

“One last,” you got up and met his lips, the two of you smiling into it and you broke apart, waving the burning card in your hand and he laughed in surprise.

“I never noticed. You’re good at this!”

“I learned from the best,” you blew the fire. “You’re… a great teacher.”

Mingi rolled his eyes, placing you down. “That’s enough playing. Go to bed. You have to get your beauty sleep. The Prince won’t be kissing you if you look like a puffer fish-”

“Hey!” You tried smacking him but he dodged, mockingly waving at you before going to his room, leaving you lovestruck as you sighed dreamily.

—---------------

Finding an idea to get to Dohyun’s chambers was fairly easy- you asked to see his childhood pictures, and he would only have that in his room.

You noticed the odd tapestry in his living room, which would surely be the entrance to the secret passage. As he picked an album, you picked every entry and exit spot. 

Getting him to kiss you was fairly easy as well, since you two had already been interrupted not long ago. You walked around his living room, commenting on every picture that hung on the wall, wondering if there were more which was when he guided you to his bedroom. 

Then all it took was a longer than usual glance for him to wrap his arms around your waist and lean forward for permission. 

Though he was a good kisser, you felt nothing. Your only focus was calmly snaking your arms around his waist and throwing the burning card in the direction of the candle, which toppled over and set fire to the carpet. You both pretended not to have heard that and you continued kissing him without breaking apart, letting the fire spread. You also were the first to break apart, a confused look on your face as you sniffed.

“Fire,” you whispered, and Dohyun turned around, looking in the direction of the fire and then under the table beside the window. You, pretending to worry, snatched the sheets off his bed.

“Quick- let’s put it out!” You shouted as you threw the sheets on the fire and stomped, and he pulled you back, doing the job himself and asking you to call the guards. You did and the fire was out before spreading too much, thankfully.

“The candle must have lost balance,” Dohyun sighed, caressing your hand. “Are you okay?”

“I am,” you sighed, “though I was quite startled. I could taste the fire in our kiss.”

“And you thought you set me on fire?” Dohyun laughed.

“You would have thought so too,” you pouted.

“Well,” Dohyun caressed your hand, looking at you lovingly. “You did set my heart on fire.”

“Oh, come on,” you slapped his chest playfully, “since when did we switch roles?”

He kissed your hand. “Thank you for acting quickly. I was quite flustered back then. It would have spread if it weren’t for you.”

You smiled and the guards came out of the room, having cleared it. You cleared your throat. “I should get going.”

“Let me walk you to your room.”

“You don’t have to,” you said but he insisted and you agreed. Dohyun promised to take you to the waterfall nearby soon.

“How soon?” You asked. 

“I have to travel West to meet some people,” he told you- you already knew that thanks to Mingi sneaking around. “I’ll be back the day after tomorrow. Let’s go after that.”

“It’s a date,” you said and he nodded, kissing your cheek as you reached your room. 

“Goodnight, Princess.”

You watched him leave, hoping this was the last time you ever saw him, because the only way he would be seeing you in the foreseeable future would be if you get caught. After he vanished, you entered your room, going straight into Mingi’s arms.

“It’s done,” you told him, sighing into the hug. “Let’s get the job done tomorrow night.”

“I’m so proud of you,” Mingi whispered, kissing your forehead. “You did well. You’ll make Wonderland proud.”

“I hope we both live to see that,” you said and he squeezed you. “Sleep with me tonight, Mingi.”

Your vulnerable tone told him that you were considering every possibility of the future, such as how this could be the last time Mingi and you were together. So Mingi nodded, waiting for you to change and call him, and then he lay down beside you, holding you while you rested your cheek on his chest. He caressed your hair which relaxed you indefinitely. You looked up at him, tracing the outlines of his face. “I have things to tell you, Mingi, before tomorrow comes. Because I know there’s a high chance that we could get separated, or worse.”

“Hope for the best, Princess,” he said. “I’ll never let you go. I’ll always be with you, you know that.”

You nodded. “I want to tell you that I love you. That I’ll fight for you when we get home. You’re no longer my guard, Mingi. You’re my partner. Anyone who dares try to hurt you would have to deal with me first.”

Mingi smiled, pulling you up and kissing you deeply at that. “I love you too. In more ways than I could imagine. I’ll always protect you, whether I’m your guard or not. And anyone who tries to hurt you will regret even thinking they had a chance.”

You laughed, pecking his cheek. “You’re quite a romantic.”

“Oh, you don’t know me yet, Princess,” he smirked, flipping you and getting on top of you, dragging his lips down the side of your face and trailing kisses down your neck and you couldn’t help but moan shamelessly. Perhaps it was the longing and desperation, mixed with the fear that this could be your last night together that made you both senseless in love, kissing each other frantically because there really could be no tomorrow, getting rid of your garments until you were skin on skin and having each other in every way possible, kissing each other on every inch of the body until it was dawn.

—-----------

“Bug!” You whispered and Mingi jumped, making you laugh silently, putting a hand over your mouth.

“We could get executed if we get caught,” Mingi whisper-shouted at you, “And you’re pranking me? While we’re on the way to steal documents from the Prince’s room? Seriously?”

“I’m sorry,” you grinned, “you know I get like this when I’m under pressure.”

Mingi shook his head, taking the torch from your hand and blowing it out when you reached the stairs. “We travel in the dark now. Hold my hand.”

You did and he guided you along, your steps as silent as a cat’s, following the wall until you two stood out in the assumed exit to the Prince’s room. “There could be guards in his living room. That’s where we are, right?”

“Guards are usually stationed outside when the Prince is not home,” he said, “but we have to be extra cautious.”

Mingi got the feel of the door- he was going to have to slide it but it would make a sound when he would first push it. He would have to wait- if the guards were inside, they’d figure out the source. If they were outside, they would dismiss it as wind.

Thankfully, no one came to kill you in the first few minutes after that sound and Mingi slid the door, asking you to wait. You waited anxiously for a minute before he came back for you. You led him to the room, sitting down near the table and feeling the wood, removing the block that sounded hollow and finding the box. It contained a few jewels, some pictures and-

“There it is,” your tone was bitter. “The proof we needed.”

A document ready to be made official, waiting only for a final signature. Document that stated that the area in the north that was once Wonderland’s, that the Utopians occupied, was now officially theirs. You sighed, regretting that you were right about all of this. It truly was a shame that it came down to this. 

“Let’s go,” Mingi rubbed your back and you nodded, placing the box back and leaving like a ghost, going to your room to grab your already packed bags and change into commoner clothing so you could pass undetected in the city. You tied your hair into a quick braid and wore your cloak over your head, taking out the hair-pin that Dohyun had gifted you. Mingi caught you staring at it.

“I could do this alone,” Mingi said and you looked at him. “I could get these documents to Wonderland. You could pretend you knew nothing.”

You placed the hair-pin on your bedside. “We’re in this together, through thick and thin. Let’s pray the Prince does not check his box first thing when he comes back and finds we’re missing.”

He nodded- you two were going to leave your guards and your belongings here, taking only the necessities. If you were lucky, the guards would be sent to search for you, and Mingi had already informed one of his trusted guards to get back to Wonderland the first chance they got. You prayed your guards would return home unscathed.

Taking Mingi’s hand, the two of you started your escape journey, going through the passage in utter darkness, depending only on Mingi’s senses until you could see the light coming from the exit. Mingi sighed as he peeked outside. “Guards right outside. We’ll have to wait till they move.”

“I hope they do,” you whispered, “because we don’t have all night.”

Waiting in silence, it took the guards around 20 minutes to move. Mingi squeezed your hand. “When I say run… you run like hell. And you remember what to do if we get separated?”

“Follow the wind,” you nodded. “You’ll find me.”

“And if I don’t?”

You gulped. “I will continue home.”

Mingi kissed your forehead. “Let’s go.”

He jumped down first, catching you when you jumped and you hid behind the bushes- you’d have to climb the wall. This was, perhaps, the riskiest part of it all. Mingi went first, making sure no one was on the other side as he threw a rope and you climbed-

All the air in your lungs left through a gasp when an arrow narrowly escaped you and hit the wall next to you. Mingi sent a dagger for one of the two men that came after you, getting rid of him instantly, and you took out your daggers and went into close combat, using the element of surprise when the guard hesitated after recognizing you and burying the dagger in his heart. Shaken, you looked at Mingi who extended his hand and you immediately climbed, jumping down after him and running towards the forest nearby.

The two of you stopped to catch your breath once you were inside the thick of the forest and you slumped down, staring at Mingi in utter disbelief of what you just did.

“I know,” Mingi wrapped his arms around you, “The first kill… it’s always the hardest. But you did it to save your home, your kingdom. Remember that you saved so many lives- let’s hope we get to see the end of it and none of that is in vain.”

“But…” you took a deep breath. “He must have a family. I wouldn’t have finished him if he hadn’t recognised me- it’s not okay.”

“You didn’t do that to protect only yourself,” Mingi squeezed your shoulders. “It’s going to get harder from here. You can still go back.”

You looked up at the sky, taking a deep breath and standing. Your eyes were steel. “Let’s move. For Wonderland.”

“For Wonderland,” Mingi got up and kissed your knuckles, “And for my Princess.”

—-------------------

It didn’t take long for the Prince to catch up to what had happened. 

The castle was in a frenzy after finding two guards killed right next to the castle wall. Perhaps wondering if there were robbers, or worse, assassins, the guards put the castle in a lockdown, searching for whoever dared trespass. All it took was the guards to make sure that their guest, the Princess, was safe to find out that she was missing.

Along with her guard.

But it looked like the Princess had been ‘taken’ since there was still half a cup of warm tea in the Princess’ room with a book open, and the guards didn’t think of any other possibility, wondering if Mingi had been killed and hidden somewhere or had gone to save his princess.

The Prince came back sooner than anticipated, worrying about your disappearance first, not suspecting anything for a good while and sending as many men as he could in search for you until one day later when he found out which document, exactly, was missing. 

It didn’t take him long after that to join the missing pieces of the story. That you, the Princess of Wonderland, had come to Utopia with an ulterior motive and had successfully fooled everyone in the castle. The search turned into a hunt then.

And you were regretting not having a faster route to get to Wonderland. You had almost been caught twice within two days and since you were on foot, it would take another two days to get to Wonderland, only if you were quick enough.

“I think you should have made me practise running more,” you breathed as Mingi led you through the trees after hearing the faint noise of horses in the distance. There weren’t many people who travelled through this part of the forest so he figured it must be the guards. “My legs are giving away.”

“Save your breath and don’t talk,” Mingi scoffed- he knew you were being partly dramatic but also partly truthful. “Let’s have a good night’s sleep tonight if we’re lucky.”

You scoffed back- luck was running shorter with every passing hour. As if to prove that point, a soldier on a horse blocked your way and Mingi sent a dagger before his bow could find any one of you. 

“Tell me we can take this horse.”

“It’s better to hide,” Mingi said to your dismay and you groaned before following him again. Hiding behind a tree for a moment, you two stocked up on your weapons, loading your bows. You looked at Mingi whose back rested against the tree trunk, his chest heaving up and down. 

You patted his arm. “Tired?”

“Of you? Definitely,” Mingi smirked and you gasped, slapping his chest. 

“I ought to leave you here,” you muttered.

“You won’t even make it to the border without me,” Mingi teased and you glared at him. 

“Well then, why don’t you go ahead yourself then? I’ll go back to the castle-” You were interrupted by Mingi pulling you towards him and pecking your cheek.

“I can’t make it anywhere without you as well, if that comforts you.”

You rolled your eyes, biting your lip as you looked away. “We better be getting a good night’s sleep tonight, Mingi.”

Mingi raised a brow at that, saluting and the two of you carried on running again, the setting sun providing you a sense of comfort. And when you started to hear the birds again, you knew that you’d successfully lost the ones who chased you. Settling down at the edge of the river, you washed the sweat off your face first before drinking gulps of water clumsily through your hands, and Mingi bent down next to you to rub your back before doing the same himself. You watched him with a faint smile and he raised his brow in question.

“Nothing,” you patted his back awkwardly. “We just make a good team.”

Mingi grinned at that, shaking his head. “You can wash up first. I’m going to make a quick scan and set the tent.”

After doing just that, the two of you sat in front of each other, staring at the pieces of wood you had collected, wondering if lighting the fire was a good idea right now. 

“I mean,” you muttered, “if we’re not going to cook… then a fire won’t be necessary, huh?”

“But it’s cold at night and I don’t want you to freeze to death,” Mingi sighed. “Can you imagine if that happened? History books would say, ‘Princess of Wonderland, smart enough to steal the documents from the Prince of Utopia but dumb enough to die of cold before reaching home-’”

“Oh, shut up,” you scoffed. “It’s not even that cold. And I’ll be using you as my body heater so I’ll be okay.”

“But I’ll be cold,” Mingi muttered and you realised this was about him. You chuckled lowly at that and he pouted. “I’ll just make do then.”

You shook your head, your hand unconsciously going to the breast pocket inside your cloak and Mingi noticed how you kept checking if the document was there every few minutes. “It’s not going to run away.”

“Won’t make me less anxious,” you told him. “I just… can’t believe we’re here right now. Like this. I never imagined, in my entire life, that I would have a price on my head and be in enemy territory as well.”

Mingi sighed. “I can understand that. This month has been the most unpredictable of my life as well. And not just because of this conflict.”

You smiled slowly at that. “I never imagined this too. I never thought I’d think of someone else, other than Dohyun, considering we were supposed to get married.”

“Do you regret it?” Mingi looked at you. You shook your head.

“Never. I have never felt so deeply in my life, Mingi. You’re the one for me. And when we get back… I will fight for you. I promise you that.”

“It’s dangerous,” Mingi shook his head and you could see how heartbroken he looked at the possibility that there was a chance everything about you two could go downhill from here. “You know Wonderland royalty is very sensitive about their status and class-”

“I’ve already broken so many rules, Mingi. I trained like a soldier when I was only supposed to sit and look pretty. I am charged with espionage as of now. I think after all this trouble, I can actually spend the rest of my life with someone I love, since I can’t marry Dohyun now, at least.”

Mingi laughed at that, hiding his face in his arms and your heart swelled at the sight. “What? You don’t want to be with me?”

“I’ve never wanted anything more,” Mingi said, not looking at you. “I just don’t want you to suffer because of me when we get back.”

“Well,” you got up and sat beside him, locking eyes with him. “What makes you think you don’t already make me suffer enough?”

“That’s my line,” Mingi was amused. “I should report you when we get back.”

“Oh?” You smirked, “What are you going to report me for? What crimes have I committed?”

“Theft,” Mingi said dramatically, “You stole my heart-”

“Oh, that’s the cheesiest thing I’ve heard in my life, Song Mingi,” you laughed out loud. “You really suck at flirting, you know that?”

“Do I?”

“I’ve been doing all the flirting in our long relationship, if you remember,” you winked at him and realisation flashed across Mingi’s eyes.

“So you intentionally said stuff like that, huh?”

Mingi was referring to the countless remarks you’d casually throw around at him during the past few years, that made him question if you were just bold or god forbid, flirting with him. He’d always dismiss it, because why would a Princess flirt with a guard and have actual intentions behind it?

“I don’t know if I’m lucky or very unlucky.”

You rested your head against his shoulder. “You’ll know when we get back home. Prepare to get promoted to a Prince soon, Mingi, because I’m having no one else now that I’ve had you.”

Mingi wondered how he, as a mere guard, had captured your heart. And he figured that even if you told him, he would still find it unbelievable. He’d always hold your face in his hands like he was now and stare into your eyes for the longest time as if all the answers he needed he could find there. And when your eyes would fall to his lips, he would always sigh and caress your face to make sure you were real before kissing you.

—-----------------

“Drop your weapons, soldier, or your Princess dies right here.”

Mingi’s heart sank to his knees but he kept aiming the arrow at the man who held a dagger at the neck of his beloved Princess. And a slight shake of your head told him not to do that, leaving him internally distraught as he tried to make a decision.

You had been so close to reaching the border, only a couple of miles away, when you heard the dreadful siren that some soldier, who had spotted you, blew. Mingi got rid of him instantly but it was too late by then, and to make matters worse, it was none other than Dohyun waiting for you at the border. 

Perhaps, he had allowed you to get here in the first place, some sort of a twisted sense of revenge to hold your life at the tip of his daggers while you could see the hills of your homeland. It was ironic but brilliant, really. You supposed he was justified to do so, considering you had stomped over his heart and all.

But you weren’t giving in so easily. It was only the two of you, but you fought. You loaded arrow after arrow, shooting everyone but the Prince- but perhaps you should have shot him first, despite the consequences, because now he was the one who was ready to take your life.

“Mingi,” you warned. “Don’t.”

But Mingi shook his head, wanting to drop the arrow so badly, not because of the amount of arrows aimed at him too, ready to shoot if he made one wrong move, but because he couldn’t bear to see you hurt. Not as a Princess. Not as his partner. 

“Think wisely,” Dohyun muttered in your ear and you hissed at how close he was. “You want your dear old guard to die first?” When you didn’t answer, he scoffed. “Thought so. Now give me the document.”

“Just tell me first,” you spat. “Was it all a lie? Was there really no chance for peace between our kingdoms, even after marriage?”

“You made it worse, just so you know,” Dohyun’s grip around your neck tightened. “I could have considered not taking any more land. But I’m not backing away now- not a chance. And you won’t have any proof to take back home when you’re dead.”

“Kill me then,” you scoffed. “And prepare for a war. You shed one drop of my blood here, and Wonderland will come for war- you know that.”

“We can always make it look like we’re the victim here, Princess,” he snickered and you realised that he could. “We could blame one of your guards. We could make it look like you were killed by your own people. I bet no one knows what you were really up to here, no? Nobody would suspect us, Princess. Now you-” Dohyun glared at Mingi. “Drop your weapon right now if you don’t want her to die this instant.”

Mingi kept aiming the arrow at the Prince’s head because he knew the two of you were doomed if he let his guard down now. The Prince wasn’t aware of your skills as a soldier yet, and since he thought he had the upper hand now, you two were at an advantage.

Especially because he had no idea you had met up with your remaining guards a day ago and asked them to keep trailing you, hidden, and wait for your signal if things went south. They were probably hidden in the trees with their weapons aimed right now. Dohyun had no idea you’d brought the deadliest assassins of your kingdom as your guards- to anyone else, they’d look and act like mere palace guards. 

Though there was still a chance that your guards had lost you and you two were on your own, you locked eyes with Mingi and a subtle nod from him told you that he would do whatever you asked him to. Your arms limp at your sides, you fiddled with your hands- which was really a signal to your guards if they were present to shoot as soon as they got the chance- the next signal you gave to Mingi, staring at where the scar on his neck was from the time he had saved you, hoping he’d get it.

And he did. And he could not bring himself to hurt you, but your hands trailed up to hold Dohyun’s arm that was holding you in place, pretending all of this was making you weak. Mingi exhaled, lowering his arrow from the Prince’s head and the scoff you heard from him made you scoff internally, because he was so going to regret this.

And Dohyun did- as soon as he saw Mingi stop lowering the arrow and aiming it at your neck, he had no time to react and Mingi shot the arrow, grazing your neck but making the arrow land in Dohyun’s chest and it all ended up in a frenzy with you flipping Dohyun on the ground and being the one to hold the dagger to his neck while your guards that were thankfully present shooting down everyone around Mingi, leaving only two who stood helpless at the sight of their Prince threatened.

“How does it feel on this side?” You asked Dohyun who was groaning in pain dramatically. “Oh, come on. You won’t die from this.”

“You’re going to regret this-”

“No, you are going to regret this, Prince,” you hissed back at him. “You’re going to regret taking advantage of our arrangement and even thinking you could use that to take over Wonderland. Wonderland is stronger than you can ever imagine, it would do you good to remember that.”

Mingi knocked the remaining guards unconscious and the two of you waited until your own guards came. The guards from the border arrived to see what the commotion was about, panicking when they saw their Prince threatened.

You made eye contact with each of the guards. “Your Prince will be delivered to you, unharmed any further, if you accompany us to the border. And don’t even think about trying anything- you can’t win now.”

With a nod from Dohyun, his guards decided to cooperate, and you insisted on being the one who held Dohyun all the way since his guards would think not twice but thrice before harming you as well. You borrowed their horses, promising to return them once you reached home, insisting you were not ‘used to taking what wasn’t yours’ and Dohyun grunted at that. Once your own guards stationed at the border spotted you, the exchange was done and you stepped inside your home ground, in front of a pale Dohyun.

“I’ll give you only one chance to set things right,” you warned Dohyun. “I can let everything go if you can stop any movement that threatens Wonderland. As you know,” you waved the document in your hand, “We have the upper hand now. If you dare make another wrong move, I’ll make this public. You know how quick the other kingdoms will be to ally with Wonderland when they learn how easily Utopia can violate peace treaties.”

“Alright,” he sighed. “You win. Give me a while before I send a message.”

“You have exactly one week,” you announced and then sighed. “I thought we could have parted on better terms, Dohyun. You brought this upon yourself. The relationship between our kingdoms can still be mended, but there is no chance for us now. And it will be better if you are the one to call our arrangement off.”

“You bet I will,” he scoffed. “Nice knowing you, Princess. I have to say it was quite an unpredictable adventure.”

You scoffed back. “Don’t take the arrow out until you have something to stop the bleeding.”

Dohyun smiled but looked confused when Mingi joined you and put an arm around you in the most casual way. You smiled knowingly and saluted Dohyun before turning away, Mingi helping you up on the horse and riding back. 

Mingi waited until Dohyun was out of sight before relaxing and you could feel his body relax since he was sitting behind you. You looked back at him, noticing him staring at the bleeding slash on your neck. “We match now.”

Mingi looked up and groaned, shaking his head. “I can’t believe this is the first thing you say to me after… all of that.”

“Come on,” you put your hands on his that held the reins. “We’re home now. We’re safe. Thank you for actually listening to me for once back there.”

“You have no idea how scared I was,” he admitted. “I’m still shaking- let’s take a breather at the first inn.”

You nodded and stopped at the first inn that arrived, thanking all of your guards sincerely first and promising to reward them as soon as you were back. After dinner at the very empty inn and a work with the innkeeper to stay quiet about this, you and Mingi went to the room to rest for the night.

“I have to say, the air really is different here,” you said as you dried your hair with a towel, standing in front of the half-open window. “Smells like home.”

Mingi, who had just entered after checking the perimeter with the guards and making sure they had good accommodations, nodded. “I’m less tense now, and I can’t believe how I was always on my toes in Utopia. It feels like I’m letting my guard down now.”

You laughed as you looked back outside. “I can relate to that. I was always on edge too.”

You felt Mingi walk to you and he took the towel, wrapping your hair in it while he waved a salve that he got from the innkeeper in front of you. “Let me.”

You nodded, and he applied it gently with his fingers, sighing again and again at the sight of the very angry red slash. It was definitely going to leave a scar. You rolled your eyes when you heard him sigh for the umpteenth time, turning and straightening his collar. “When are you going to stop feeling sorry? Because I made it clear that you acted upon my order.”

“It’s not because of that,” he shut the box and tossed it on the bed. “I just… when I think of how things could have gone so badly from there-”

“But they didn’t,” you rested your hands on his chest as you looked up at him. “And we’re here, you and I. Safe. So you can relax now.”

Mingi tucked your damp here behind your ear, tossing the towel away and letting your hair loose as well. He smiled before bringing you in for a hug and this time you sighed into it, realising that he was home. You would always feel at home and safe in his arms. You let him stay like that for a good few moments, let him kiss your forehead and then litter kisses all over your face as if he couldn’t believe you were here, with him.

“You’re tickling me,” you grinned when he trailed his lips down your temple. You felt him smile and he tilted your face to look at you, shaking his head and finally kissing you where you most wanted him, unrushed and lazy yet it was the first time your knees gave away and you desperately held onto him. He took you to bed, making you lay down and you let him kiss you until he got tired and buried his nose in the crook of your neck, dozing off instantly. You laughed to yourself, smacking his arm lightly and following him right after.

—-----------------

“That’s preposterous,” the King, your father, glared at you and you looked helplessly at your mother- the only person who could make your father see things differently. 

“I am aware that what I did was dangerous and wrong on many levels,” you met eyes with your father, “but it was necessary, you must understand that. All the better given I got us physical proof of their betrayal. That should also be a good enough reason to break off our arrangement.”

“It’s been more than a decade, and everyone is aware of the arrangement. You will be frowned upon if you break this off now. Especially if it’s him breaking it off right after your visit.”

“What do you expect her to do, darling?” Your mother sighed, putting a hand on her forehead. “She can’t exactly live in peace with him now.”

“Which is why I’m cross with her,” your father replied. “She should have sent someone else to do the stealing.”

“No one else would have succeeded,” you smiled inwardly, “and you know that.”

“Well,” your father groaned. “We’ll know in one week if you made the right decisions. I ought to ground you until then.”

You rolled your eyes. “It’s not like I even leave the palace or come out of my room often. If you wish to ground me, go ahead.”

Your mother smiled at that, urging you to take a seat. You had been standing all this time, ready to disappear if your father didn’t take the news well, but thankfully, it looked like he was okay for now. 

Except he was still glaring at you. “You look like you have something else to tell me.”

“I do, actually,” you met eyes with your parents. “But this is not the right time. So, tell me, how have things been while I was away?”

You spent the next few days mostly in the library, going through the history of Wonderland, searching for examples where a king, queen, prince or princess married someone who was not of their status. You found none, figuring that even if someone had (someone must have in the centuries of Wonderland’s existence) it would never be recorded in the books. It would be considered a ‘tarnish’ to the seemingly perfect history.

But was there a law that said you and Mingi could not be together?

So you spent the rest of the week going through the laws too. You asked around as casually as you could, you went through books, exerting yourself until you collapsed in the library and your maids had to carry you back. 

And that finally got Mingi, who had been avoiding you, to come visit you.

You smiled when you felt his hand snake through yours, recognizing him by his calloused and hard hands without opening your eyes. “I think I should do that more often. At least it got you to come see me.”

Mingi sighed. “You know how risky it is here. I have no reason to guard you here all the time so my presence would only make everyone suspicious. I’m risking so much being here with you like this too.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” you pouted and he pinched your cheek as he smiled. “But you haven’t even come to see me formally.”

“Everytime I look at you,” he nearly whispered, “I want nothing more than to hold you. I have to hold myself back for your sake.”

You were lost in the emotion in his eyes for a few moments before you pulled him, making him sit on the bed next to you and wrap his arms around you. He held you with a sigh, kissing the top of your head. You buried your nose in the crook of his neck, your arms around his neck as well. 

“If anyone comes without knocking, we’re dead.”

“No one would dare come without knocking,” you told him, kissing the scar on his neck, making his hold on you get tighter. “I missed you so much.”

Mingi swept your hair back, holding your face in his hands, staring at it for the longest time as if he was mesmerised. You licked your lips and it was his undoing as he basically crashed his lips on yours, kissing you desperately, with a pressure that had you craning back and back until you were lying flat on your bed. Your hands ran all over his toned chest, wanting to take off his clothes but the sane part in you told you that you were already risking too much. And perhaps, Mingi felt the same, opting to only push his hand under your clothes to hold you at your waist. Lack of breath made you break apart, only for him to trail his lips down your scar. 

“I’ve been asking around too, you know,” he said as he kissed your neck again. “I think you should talk to your mother first.”

“Really?” You frowned. “What did you hear?”

“I can’t say it out loud. If it’s false information, some people really need to answer why they’ve been spreading such stories. But if it’s true… I think she won’t be surprised.”

You understood what he meant, confused still because as far as you knew, your mother married your father at a young age, had your elder sister who was already married off and a queen of another kingdom, and had you. She’d always lived a recluse life. But could she be the one who would relate to you?

You got Mingi’s attention by tugging at his arm and the two of you sat in front of each other. “I’ve gone through the history- there’s nothing there. There’s nothing about a princess not marrying someone of royal blood in the law too. So what’s really stopping us?”

“I care about your reputation and how people will judge you if you become mine,” Mingi played with the hair that fell on your shoulder. “I care only about how people will speak of you.”

“And I care about none of that. Rather,” you smiled, “we could be the first ones to set an example. That the royals can, after all, marry for love, whoever that is.”

Mingi smiled at the notion. “I’m also worried about what comes next. By marrying you…”

“You’ll be Prince, and in future, the King,” you looked at him proudly, kissing him deeply before continuing. “There’s no one who could do a better job, and no one who deserves this more than you.”

Mingi kissed your forehead. “Let’s hope someone else believes that too.”

“But…” you bit your lips as you considered the other possibility. “If you don’t want to rule alongside me…”

“I won’t ask you to step down, because you are Wonderland’s only hope,” Mingi caressed your face. “Your sister should have been the one, but she believed she couldn’t bear the burden. But I know you can. And if I can share even some of it with you, if you can love me forever… I’ll be the happiest, even though I never imagined to be anything but a guard in my wildest dreams.”

You wiped your teary eyes, laughing along with him as your heart swelled at his words. “I do not deserve someone as good as you, Song Mingi.”

“I do not deserve someone as annoying as you, Princess, but here we are,” he sighed dramatically and you slapped his arm, gasping. 

“Well, you better be prepared to put up with it for the rest of your life,” you scoffed and he crossed his heart. 

—------------------

You never expected your mother to tell you a tragic tale of a forbidden love gone wrong when you told her that you had a man in your heart that wasn’t Dohyun.

She told you about the time after she had you, when you were 5, when her parents who were from Mist Island were sick with a life-threatening disease and she had gone to be with them in their perhaps last moments- her father survived but her mother passed away.

She told you about the young, handsome doctor who took care of your parents. She spoke with such love in her eyes that you were brought to tears. After speaking about it out loud for the first time, she was reliving through the memories.

“It was never my intention to be unfaithful to your father, who had done nothing but shower me with love and everything that I wanted. But perhaps, falling in love out of your own accord was something I hadn’t experienced with your father which led to the events in my parent’s home. We never went far- we were just friends. We would sit on the balcony and talk all night long. You know how much I was interested in medical sciences- he educated me, in a way. And somehow… I forgot that I was married and a mother of two when I was with him.”

“But…” you sniffed. “It’s not wrong to fall in love.”

“It wasn’t right either,” your mother sighed, brushing her dark long hair back, “I should have known that as a queen, there were eyes that followed me everywhere. I made the first move. I held his hand first. I hugged him first. I never got to kiss him.”

You were too scared to ask why and your mother nodded, confirming your suspicions. “My father found out. He warned me, but I took it lightly. So when he caught us sitting next to each other, he decided to send me back to Wonderland, even though it had only been days after my mother’s passing. As for the doctor… I believe he had someone take care of him- that’s what I was informed of, at least. I mourned two deaths when I came back, though the world only knows of one.”

You sat in a trance as the gravity of the situation settled in. Your grandfather had definitely reacted rashly. It wasn’t fair to the man whose only sin was to love your mother, and it wasn’t fair to your mother as well. Your mother put a hand over yours, though you wished you would have been the one to do that, in hopes to provide a sense of comfort to her. 

“It’s our secret,” she winked at you. “You’re the first soul I told. So will you trust your mother and confide in me? Perhaps I can help you make better decisions.”

So you told her everything, and she listened with a smile. You told her how you had feelings for Mingi from way back, but you never acted upon them- perhaps fearing they might not be reciprocated. You told her how you went to Utopia, intending to find out if Dohyun really was the man for you. 

“Perhaps I would have married him, if it weren’t for the political issue,” you smiled. “I would have dismissed my feelings for Mingi. But… deep down, I always knew I could never be truly satisfied with Dohyun, or anyone else for that matter. And Mingi… he’s always been so good to me. His heart is made of steel, and his feelings for me were buried there. I had to struggle so much to get him to look at me. And when he did… the intensity of it blew me away. I don’t think I can love anyone else, mother.”

“I understand,” she patted your cheek. “Dohyun has sent a message about your engagement. He called it off, like you told us he would. Your father is busy considering other suitors at the moment.”

“Do you think he’ll ever accept this? I’ve looked through history, through the law, there’s nothing that says we can’t be together except for stupid tradition and customs-”

“They are there for a reason,” your mother raised a brow, “but perhaps, we really do need to break some. They can be quite suffocating.”

You nodded. Your mother told you to lay low for a while and that she would slowly plant the seed in your father’s brain, see how he reacts and then proceed with you.

After a few weeks, you stood in front of your father who was partly angry but more surprised. You told him that if he wished that Wonderland be ruled by his blood, he better accept your proposal. Your parents burst out laughing at your bravery at that, but it took only a second for your father to be angry again. 

“Imagine if Dohyun never called off the engagement. Do you know how much you’ve risked Wonderland?”

“I saved Wonderland. Mingi saved Wonderland even when no one asked him to. What guard would have done that for me? It was love that made him risk everything with me, father.”

Your father scoffed, glaring at you. “Go to your room. Mingi is no longer your guard. I’ll have a little chat with him and see what should be done.”

“Father,” you sat down on your knees in front of him. “I beg you, do not harm him in any way. He saved me numerous times. It’s the least you can do for me, even if you won’t allow it- do not harm him.”

He considered for a moment before he grunted ‘fine’ and you scurried off to your room with a look at your mother who gave you a nod, indicating that she could handle it.

And perhaps she did, perhaps it was your father who had a change of heart (quite unexpected since you thought he’d throw you both in the dungeons) or perhaps it was Mingi himself who won his heart.

Mingi never told you what happened that night. He just told you that he’d always be indebted to your mother for helping him out and to your father for accepting him as his son-in-law.

The castle was in an uproar when they heard of your engagement, soon to be wedded to Mingi. The guards never expected that someone like Mingi won the Princess’ heart (to be fair, they only ever saw the stern side of Mingi). The maids wondered just how long this had gone on, finding it quite scandalous. But you?

You couldn’t be happier. 

As you slept with Mingi, your husband, you couldn’t be more loved and happier.

“Maybe you should stop staring at me and sleep. We’ve had enough of love making tonight.”

You slapped his chest. “I’m only thinking.”

“What?” He opened one eye, his thumb absently caressing the skin on your hips.

“How lucky I am to be here,” you kissed his cheek, lingering for a while.

“You’re making me want to go for a third round. I’m tired.”

“I thought you had more strength in you, considering you were a guard, but I guess you were wrong- ah!”

A surprised yelp left you as Mingi flipped you over and whispered things in your ears that made you go red and laugh as you tried pushing him off, but it looked like he did have the strength for a third round afterall.

something there pt. 3

pairing: assassin!mingi x assassin trainee!reader (gender not specified)

part one : here !

part two : here !

theme: angst, crack for a minute if you squint, angsty fluff?

word count: 3.6K

cw: huge mentions of blood!! major character is shot, injury, swearing, violence

lowercase intended!

a/n: part three to something there! another cliff hanger so part 4 is already in the works! sorry for the long wait i’ll try not to be as long with part 4 hehe! enjoy!! feedback is always appreciated 💙

~~

as the two of you drove down the highlighted route, the radio hummed in the background, filling in the empty silence as hills and empty valleys rolled along beside you. mingi’s hand was resting close to his wound, his eyes averted outside of the window, irises jumping along with the scenery.

you, on the other hand, kept taking glances over to mingi, eyeing his state to make sure he wasn’t in too much pain, or about to pass out on you.

on what seemed like the 50th time you looked at him, mingi finally spoke.

“what,” he said, turning his head to catch your eyes, which made you blink, looking away fast.

“i’m- i was- what?” you sputtered helplessly, heat working up the back of your neck and cheeks. mingi found this hilarious, but you would never know that- judging his emotionless expression.

you were chewing the inside of your cheek out of embarrassment of being caught stealing glances.

“you keep looking at me,” he explained the obvious, “why?”

“just- just checking.” your profile answered him, earning a sigh.

“i’m fine, it's just a bullet.” he tore his eyes away from your face finally, looking back out of the window, and you let out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding.

the man's gaze was too intense for his own good.

“the fact that it’s a bullet makes it worse, mingi. i’m just-” you shook your head, “this mission will be easier if i have a capable partner.”

“so you need me?” mingi’s voice was coy, mirroring the slight smirk on his lips. the sheer audacity of the statement made you flustered.

“no, that- that is not what i said.” you denied, looking over at him quickly, then away again.

“you need me.” mingi confirmed for you, nodding and looking out the front window, his smirk growing. frustration bloomed inside of you.

you sighed in an attempt to release some of the feeling, but it didn’t help that mingi let out a short chuckle as a result of your anger.

“no, mingi. i would rather have someone i can work with over dead weight.” your voice was firm, but mingi saw right through it, easily, and before he could help it, his chuckle turned to a more heavy laugh.

now, you fully turned to look at him. not in anger, but in awe.

the orange-haired man laughed openly and freely, head throwing back a bit. his mouth pulled into a wide smile, you could see the slight crook to his front teeth. his eyes were upside down crescents, and you could’ve sworn your heart jumped at the sound of his laughter.

mingi finally caught sight of you, staring at him in what could only be explained as complete shock. his cough quickly rolled into a short cough, his smile disappearing. he cleared his throat a little more, avoiding looking at you.

“you were laughing.” the statement was very obvious, but you couldn’t shake the shock you felt.

“no i wasn’t.”

this earned a short laugh from you, did he really think he could just say he didn’t? your laughter grew, one hand coming up to cover your mouth as you laughed hard, and now it was mingi’s turn to be shocked.

“what?” he demanded, sounding far too angry over this. “i wasn’t laughing, i was coughing.”

this only made your laughter grow, you almost lost control of the steering wheel, the car swerving.

“stop laughing! drive!” mingi reached over and grabbed the wheel, steering as well as he could. you fully let go of the wheel, holding your stomach, one hand still covering your mouth.

mingi made eye contact with you as you laughed, and he fought the smile that tried to grace his lips.

“what’s so funny?” he voiced, your laughs finally subsiding slightly.

“hoo..” you breathed out, giggling slightly still and wiping your tears. mingi stared at your uncovered smile, and he hated how his breath caught in his throat.

“you- you’re so weird.” you giggled and shook your head, holding the wheel again.

“why do you do that?” he let go of the wheel, sitting back.

“what? laugh? because you were being dumb, mingi.” you snickered again.

“no,” he spoke, “why do you cover your mouth?”

this made you eye him. you opened your mouth to answer, but nothing came out.

“i don't know,” you shrugged finally, “instinct, i guess?”

mingi was quiet for a second.

“it’s pretty.” you barely heard his voice, but it was there.

“what?” you looked at him.

he looked at you.

“don’t cover your smile when you laugh. it’s pretty.” he said clearly, holding eye contact.

you blinked, staring at him.

“oh, i- okay.” you nodded, looking away.

‘what kind of answer was that!?” you yelled at yourself in your head.

mingi had looked out of the window again, acting as if he had never said such a personal thing.

you didn’t notice or see, but mingi wiped his sweaty hands on his pants, proud of himself for not pussying out.

~~

the rest of the car ride carried on in silence. mingi had fallen asleep, but it wasn’t too late and you found the music helped keep you up.

the two of you reached closer to the warehouse finally. not close enough to be seen by them, but close enough that you could see it. you were, essentially, in the middle of nowhere. the terrain was full of flat grassy landscapes,stretching as far as the eye could see. it wouldn’t be hard to spot you two if you got too close.

you used your better judgement to slow the car before you got too close to the location and got caught.

an incoming call from hongjoong shocked mingi awake, his eyes snapping open, and back straightening out.

you muffled a laugh, answering the call.

“hello?” you answered the phone, noticing how mingi rubbed the sleep out of your eyes.

“hey, you guys there yet?” hongjoong’s voice came a bit scratchy from the other side. you assumed the service here wouldn’t be the best, seeing as there was no civilization near or around you.

“yeah, we’re close but not too close,” you confirmed.

“good, you remember my orders, right? in and out, no mess, no chaos, no trace of ever being there. got it?” the leader's voice continued to crack in and out every second, you and mingi were straining your ears to capture the orders.

“yeah, we got it.” mingi said, “the chopper is coming to get us?”

“yeah, just get to the roof with the file labelled-”

“q334t9. yeah, we got it.” you interrupted hongjoong, shifting the gears and driving off again.

mingi rolled his eyes.

“is y/n driving?” hongjoong asked. mingi froze.

“..no” he tried, earning a chuckle from you.

“i am driving, because mingi got himself s-”

“i needed to sleep.” now it was your turn to get interrupted by mingi.

“what?” came hongjoong’s voice.

“no, he got sh-” you tried again.

“stop.” mingi cut in, again.

“can you let me speak?” you turned to face him.

“this is immature.” hongjoong’s voice tried to work its way in, not understanding anything.

“no. that isn’t relevant, y/n.” mingi ignored his leader's voice.

“yes it is, what do you mean not relevant?” you retorted.

“i told you not to fucking talk about that.” mingi gritted out through his teeth.

“you might need modification accordingly! it’s a big deal!” your voice rose.

“i don't need modification-”

“yes you do-!”

“shut up, oh my god.”

“no, you need help-”

“why do you always fucking think that?”

“because you do-”

“no i don’t-”

your voices overlapped, and hongjoong rubbed his temples, trying to make sense about what was going on, with your loud voice and mingi’s irritatingly low voice.

“you are hurt!” hongjoong managed to make your voice out.

“i’m fine.”

you got sh- mffph!” mingi’s hand was over your mouth, cutting off your voice in a second. he leant over the car controls, staring close and deep into your eyes.

his hand was tight against your mouth and nose, cutting off your air, you furrowed your brows glaring at him and trying to fight his arm off, but to no use. he was too strong.

“i am fine, we are fine.” mingi breathed out, his hand still on your mouth, unfazed by your struggle. “we’ll see you soon.”

hongjoong was silent for a moment before speaking.

“get it done.” he gave his final order, then hung up.

mingi’s hand finally fell from your mouth, and you gasped for air, inhaling deeply.

“don’t you ever-” you began, rage rising in your stomach, voice already rising.

but interruption seemed like a very common topic at the moment.

“don’t.” mingi’s order was quick and sharp.

you opened your mouth to retort, but the look of his set jaw and glaring eyes had you sitting quiet.

you silently drove closer to the building, following a route that would take you to the back, where you wouldn't be seen.

“stop the car. we have to walk from here.” mingi ordered, and once again, you complied.

after you parked the stolen car, both of you stepped out, mingi getting his bag from the back and adjusting it across his shoulder.

the man led the way, still following the route to the back, and you trailed behind him.

the walk would take around 20 minutes, and you could tell it’d be dark by the time you two would reach the building.

that was a convenience, you thought, and felt more at ease.

the entire walk was filled with the padding of your feet against the grass, no voices or sounds from either of you.

when you finally reached the fence surrounding the warehouse, your neck craned to look all the way up, whereas mingi looked around the bottom for a way in.

“we can climb the fence..” despite your suggestion, your voice was uncertain, the height of the fence was nothing but daunting.

“there’s a door, y/n.” mingi informed you, tugging on the lock that held the said door shut.

“but it’s locked, mingi.” you imitated the way he had said your voice so pointedly. mingi rolled his eyes.

“let me see the bag,” you ordered, “i’ll pick the lock.” mingi turned around, letting you dig around in the bag.

he was confused, though, because the only way he understood was that you would have to shoot the lock off.

“there’s nothing in there that’ll help you.” he thought- almost knew your attempts were futile.

but, nevertheless, you emerged with a tiny bobby pin, smiling in triumph.

mingi sighed internally.

‘of course.’ he thought.

still smirking, you leant down and picked at the lock, your tongue sticking out in concentration, which mingi picked up on.

he smiled, just a little.

“c’mon… almost..” you whispered, feeling around for any click.

and there it was.

click.

“yes!” you cheered, a bit too loud.

“shh.” mingi ordered, pulling the lock off the door and carefully opening the fence door.

the man let you in, shaking his head barely at how proud you looked for picking the lock.

you didn’t care what he thought, a win was a win.

the area was an average warehouse yard, littered with storage containers and large trash bins, there wasn’t anything to check for, so the two of you made a beeline to the nearest door.

weirdly, the door was unlocked, mingi twisting the handle and opening it for you, letting you go in first, and following behind you with his gun cocked and ready.

the inside was much more modern than outside. the hallways were long and grey, lights lit up along the sides of the ceilings, and no one in sight.

“the office is on the 19th floor.” mingi whispered to you, to which you nodded.

the walk continued, and for once the silence was good, you both kept an ear out for any sudden noises.

“mingi, an elevator,” you whispered, jogging forward and reaching it. mingi nodded, pressing the only button that was there.

the elevator opened almost immediately, both of you stepping in, and you pressing the 9th floor.

“i think i should take a gun,” you quietly suggested, “who knows what we’ll run into there.”

mingi shook his head.

“mingi, i’m going to need to protect myself.” you demanded. having a gun wasn’t about just having it, you were genuinely afraid. you knew anyone here would have one, and you needed to stay safe.

“no,” but mingi continued to deny that you needed it. “i’m here to fight, you’re here to get the file.”

“mingi,” your voice went soft suddenly, but mingi didn’t cave. “i don’t feel safe, i need a gun.”

“no.” the ding of the elevator followed his statement, and he walked out, down the hall.

you cursed under your breath, jogging after him.

you both walked down the hall, knowing the office at the end of the hallway is where the file would be.

mingi slowed in front of the door, there was another lock, but more secure than the one on the fence.

“the only way in is to shoot it,” you piped in, watching as the gears turned in mingi’s head.

“they’ll hear us.” he looked down at you.

“i’ll be fast.” you assured him.

mingi took a deep breath, aiming his gun, but not looking away from you yet.

you nodded, holding eye contact.

with a bang, the lock was blown off, and alarms sounded loudly through the warehouse.

you wasted no time, running in, already hearing footsteps running to the office.

looking everywhere, you broke open drawers and checked in cupboards around the office, but it was nowhere.

‘q334t9. q334t9. q334t9.” you kept repeating the name of the file in your head.

“hurry!” mingi grunted from outside, men began running down the hall at mingi, and the fighting began.

you frantically looked outside.

“shit.”

mingi was managing to hold off the men, and you took out your phone and informed hongjoong to bring the chopper.

then it hit you.

the desktop.

the file was electronic.

tears of worry welled up in your eyes.

mingi’s grunts and the gunshots distracted you, your head whipping from the desktop to the door, panic surging through your veins.

“hurry!” mingi shouted. this would be impossible without more time, you would need time to hack into the system, which would take god knows how long.

you cursed under your breath, abandoning the desktop and running to the door.

“duck!” you yelled, and mingi complied. your leg came in contact with the guard he was battling, making him fall back.

“you can’t fight- go find the file!” mingi ordered, jumping back into action.

neither of you stilled, taking down as many guards away as you could.

“it’s digital!” you grunted the last word, taking a hit and stumbling back.

mingi caught you, and without a beat, literally threw you into the oncoming guards, knocking them down.

“ow.” you grumbled, getting back up. you fought off from where you were, but there were too many guards, it’d be hard to get them all down.

“mingi!” you yelled over your shoulder, “we have to lock ourselves into the room! there’s no other way!” you didn’t need to hear a confirmation from mingi, you knew he heard you when his gun fired.

you ducked quickly.

if mingi used his gun, the guards would definitely begin to shoot as well.

and they did.

a loud array of bullets firing off made you jump, hurriedly ducking down.

mingi could protect himself, he had a gun.

you did not.

trying your best to shield yourself, you ran to the office door, but, obviously, there was no avoiding the downfall of bullets.

the metal pierced your lower abdomen, exactly where your vest didn’t cover.

you let out a gasp, hand coming down immediately to clutch the wound.

looking down, blood was already seeping heavily through your hand.

mingi didn’t notice.

you took a heavy breath, grabbing a gun from mingi’s holster- again, and fired openly, hitting down the remaining group of guards easily.

both your breaths filled the silence.

you looked at mingi.

“you really like to take your time with things, don’t you?” you rolled your eyes, stumbling into the room, yanking mingi in with you.

“push the shelves in front of the door.” you ordered. your ears were ringing, hand soaked with blood, but mingi still didn’t see. instead, he did as he was told. putting down his bag, he let you take out whatever you needed, while he barricaded the door.

your blood coated the tech as you pulled it out, plugging it into the laptop.

it took less than two seconds for the desktop to unlock, and you began your search.

your mind was slowing down, hands dragging slightly, but you kept your eyes open.

“q334t9. q334t9. q334t9. q334t9.” you didn’t stop repeating the word.

more footsteps approached the door.

“shit.” mingi swore, looking at you, “are you almost done?”

“almost.” your voice was choked.

then mingi noticed the trail of blood on the floor, leading to you, and his eyes landed on your hand pressing against your abdomen.

“y/n, you’re bleeding.” he ran to your side, ignoring the banging against the door.

“great job, mingi. want a sticker?” your snide remark didn’t wave his state, worry filling him to the brim.

“leave it- we have to go. you’re going to die.” mingi tried to pull you off.

you two could hear the chopper flying over the roof, as well as the shelf shifting against the door.

“let me do this.” you were stern, eyes lighting up when you finally found the file.

“got it.” you plugged in your usb, downloading the data didn’t take very long, and you had the file in your usb ready.

mingi didn’t waste time in shooting the desktop, looking at you for a second, before you were crumbling to the floor.

“fuck.” mingi caught you by your arms, noticing how your eyes were barely open.

“oh.. oh no..” you groaned, mingi inhaled in panic. “mingi it- it really hurts.” your words were dragged and mumbled.

“i know- i know, okay? let’s go. just look- keep looking at me.” mingi ordered, grabbing his bag, and taking out a small explosive. he hauled you up, carrying your dead weight bridal style.

the shelf had shifted significantly, the arms of the men were beginning to push through.

mingi jogged over to the window, looking 19 stories down and taking a deep breath.

“mingi..” you slurred touching his cheek, mingi looked down at you.

“hey, hey ’m here.” he assured you, holding the hand on his cheek. “‘m here.” he muttered one more time, walking backwards.

the shelf broke down, men running in. mingi pulled the safety off the bomb with his teeth, throwing it behind him and running at the window.

your drowsy eyes widened, your grip on mingi tightening, as did his on you.

mingi’s arms shielded you as he broke through the glass, and as soon as you two were out of the window, the bomb went off, the shock pushing you two further from the building, and definitely eliminating everyone inside.

as best as he could, mingi shot a line gun, aiming perfectly onto the helicopter. hooking onto the bottom leg, he reeled you two in with the press of a button.

it didn’t take long, the two of you were in the chopper fast.

“go- go! she got shot, you have to go!” mingi yelled at the pilot, who complied quickly, flying as fast as the chopper could go.

“y/n, y/n? you there?” his hands cupped your face, and you weakly held onto his right wrist.

“‘m here- i-” you coughed, interrupting your own speech.

“good- good, you’re good. okay? you’ll be okay.” mingi didn't let go of you, looking back at the pilot.

“i don't feel right, mingi, i w- ‘m gonna take a nap.” you whispered, your grip loosening, eyes shutting more and more.

“no just- just stay awake, y/n.” tears welled up in his eyes, grabbing your hand.

“y/n!” mingi’s voice faded in your ears, your eyes shut and your head fell back against the floor, body going limp.

time stood still.

mingi’s tears fell, he didn’t let go of you. he held on.

4 remaining minutes of the trip.

3 minutes it took to land and get you into the compound on a stretcher.

2 minutes of running down the hall to the hospital wing.

1 minute of being yanked off of you by hongjoong.

and you were gone behind the swinging doors.

and then waiting.

the hour was a blur.

there were bits of nurses fixing his cuts and cleansing his wound.

and yunho helping him change into clean clothes.

hongjoong talking to him- but he heard only white noise.

why was he so upset? he barely knew you.

he knew nothing of your past, where you came from, who you were, who you loved.

he knew nothing of your future. who you could’ve been to him. what you two could have become.

he knew nothing.

and he wanted to know- so bad.

he wanted to see that.

a future.

with you.

the ringing in his ear stopped when the central doctor came out.

“y/n’s alive.”

it was muffled at first.

“what?” mingi stood up, speaking for the first time.

“y/n will be okay.” the doctor assured him.

and finally, the ringing stopped, and mingi saw it.

the hope for a future.

with you.

~~

part 1 !

part 2 !

Who (1/?) -J.Y & S.M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 2 Part 3

"Mingi, please. I think we should talk; I don't feel good and…" He was quick to cut you off.

"Y/n not right now, I'm tired."

You are always tired these days…

"Yunho, love do you want to go out and check out that new cafeteria? I heard they have…" He was quick to cut you off.

"Y/n not right now, I'm busy."

You are always busy these days...

Things haven't been the same in a while, always in a rush, always in a mood. You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you. It was a type of routine you had grown accustomed to, and even if it was killing you inside, the idea of being without them was way worse than the pain of their neglect. Cold, endless nights laying in a bed that was way too big for you; tasteless dinner plates that would end up in the trashcan or at the back of the fridge rotting. A home that was crumbling from its foundations, one that you had so desperately tried to patch up and fix by yourself. But in the end, you just had to face the cruel reality, that they don't care. You were not a priority; your relationship was at the bottom of their list.

That's how you ended up at Chan's apartment, in the middle of the night, with so much as your phone in your pocket and your heart in your hand.  He had been your main support the last weeks, anything you wanted, anything you needed, no questions asked. Whenever you woke up crying, whenever you broke down in the middle of the day, Chan was always there to comfort you. And so, you laid there, in his chest, the aftermath of a movie night in which you had only cried twice, an important milestone.

The constant buzzing in the pocket of your pyjamas was making it quite hard for you to continue sleeping. You knew exactly who dared bother you so late at night, it had been the same callers every single night for the past month.

"Don't answer it." Chan's groggy voice filled your ears. He was right. You declined the call and turned off your phone.

But said-call had already done its job, you couldn't stop thinking about the phone, well the people behind it. Your phone was full of texts and missed calls, eight people behind them, because their friends were loyal like that.

They are so sorry.

Please talk to them.

Yunho is drowning himself in work.

Mingi doesn't even talk to us.

Funny it is. A few weeks ago, it seemed they could live perfectly fine without you; they could go on with their day without even glancing your way. You gave them every single piece of your being just to get crumbles in return. But at the same time, your heart is weak, it can’t help but break every time you read one of their texts, wondering if they miss you that much, if they are sorry, if maybe, just maybe, you should go back.

“Y/n… you are overthinking again.” Bang Chan said, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“I know, I just feel bad, Chan. Maybe I overreacted, maybe if I tried a bit harder to talk to them…” There you were again, trying to justify their actions. Chan gave you the same stern look he had been giving you for weeks, every time you blamed yourself.

He got up, not mentioning the subject anymore. Tired of going on about the same subject, “Hey, are you hungry? I can make you something or we can order in.”

It would be a lie to say you were not enjoying Chan’s presence. Having someone to talk to, someone to have a meal with, even someone who sits next to you without being on their phone or computer, you miss not feeling alone. And even though you were heartbroken, you felt warm on the inside.

-------------------------------------------------------

While you might be doing somewhat okay, the other parts of your relationship were not. The house was in complete silence, no matter the hour, no matter the day, no one would dare say a word, their mouths too busy sobbing every single time they remembered their sins, taking you for granted, neglecting you, breaking you.

Yunho would keep himself busy at the hospital, the idea of going back to a broken home simply made him nauseous, and even if the lack of food and the stress were killing him, he much rather endure that than face the harsh truth. Mingi wasn’t any better, endless nights spent in the office, acting as if he was reviewing cases, but the reality was that he just wanted a place to cry without anyone noticing him. Even the love between them was running cold. Fight after fight, they spat cruel words and thoughts trying to get all the hurt and anger out of their chests, blaming themselves, blaming each other. How did they not notice things were so wrong? How could they let things get so wrong?

“Oh, don’t act as if I'm the only one who wasn’t here, you slept at the office almost every day. I came home late, but you didn’t even come at all.” Yunho said, venom in his voice and a glass of whiskey in his hand.

Mingi scratched his forehead in frustration, he could feel the bile going up his throat. “Forgive me for trying to pay the bills, someone has to pay for the house, the student loans, the fucking food that’s on the table.”

“Fuck off, don’t you dare say I’m not bringing any money. Besides, you know that this is temporary while I finish my residency…”

And there the cycle began once again, a screaming match of arguments that never went anywhere, masking the true cause of their pain. Tears ran down their faces, their voices broke down more and more with each word they let out, Yunho's body trembled so much it hurt, while Mingi’s chest felt as if it was about to explode.

“I’m not okay, Yunho.” It was the first time any of them said it out loud, his voice was much raspier and heavier than the usual one.

“I'm not either, Mingi.” He whispered, fearing he would break down even more if he admitted it much louder.

“She left three weeks ago.”

Yunho could only nod.

“She’s not coming back, is she?”

“I don’t know, Mingi.”

Who. (2/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 3

Yunho kept checking the file in his hands, reading over and over the same words not being able to register anything, his head was all over the place, between the tiredness, the stress and his broken heart, concentrating was proving to be impossible.

“Careful, Jeong. If you think any harder your head might catch on fire.” Said Lee Minho entering the doctor’s launch with an empty coffee mug.

“Piss off, Minho.” He didn't turn his eyes from the paper, determined to make it work no matter how much it took.

Minho’s eyes focused on the taller man in front of him, his skin was paler than normal, a slight blue tint covered it; his eyes were sunk in their sockets, dark purple bags underneath them; lips dry and crusty; he looked thinner, he looked sick. Yunho and Minho weren’t by any means close, they had spent the entire med school fighting for the top spot in their class; Jeong Yunho had proved to be a real pain in the ass, managing to balance school, work, friends and a fucking three-way relationship while Lee Minho could barely sleep and see his, now, husband.

“Not that I care, Jeong but, are you okay?” Said Minho, leaning against the countertop and waiting for the coffee to be done.

Yunho tossed the folder on the table, completely done. He pressed his fingers against his eyelids, trying to calm the blinding headache he had been carrying around his entire shift. “I don’t think it’s any of your business, Lee.”

The cat-eyed doctor shrugged, not wanting to dig any further, he tried. He took his mug and made a beeline straight to the door, but he couldn’t help but look back at his school rival, and what he saw shocked him a bit. His shoulders were slumped, and shaking, his face in between his hands, and small but heavy sobs left his mouth. A suffering Yunho was something he had never expected to see, and while he thought it would bring him joy, it just made him feel weird. He would have to ask Jisung what was going on, he was friends with Mingi, and he would have to know.

______________________________________________________________

Mingi was not doing any better at work. He fell asleep on his desk, barely paid attention at meetings, and was hostile to his co-workers and possible clients. Jongho was done with attitude, he had been patient, as much as he could, and he tried to understand the situation, but it was becoming too much.

“Mingi, I am begging you, please go home, you cannot continue like this. Get some sleep, eat and come back when you are better.” Jongho said as softly as possible, not wanting to trigger another fight with the dirty blonde lawyer in front of him.

“Jongho, I’m okay. I would rather just be working, there’s nothing to do at home anyways.”

“Mingi…” He was interrupted.

“Jongho, I won't repeat myself, leave me alone.” He turned his chair away from the younger lawyer.

That was it. He was done.

Jongho slammed his hand against the desk, startling Mingi, “Listen to me, Mingi, I get that you are sad, okay? I get it. But you cannot come here and act like a fucking dick and expect everyone to be okay with it. We tried to be nice and give you a couple of weeks to recover, but so far, we have lost two important clients because of your attitude and you pissed off three more. I’m sorry she left, but I highly doubt she would come back if she saw the mess you’ve become. Yelling at people, turning work in late, getting drunk, fighting with Yunho, do you think she wants that? Because I highly doubt it.” He jabbed his finger into Mingi’s chest. “Get. Your. Shit. Together.” And with that he left the office, slamming the door on his way out.

Mingi sighed, taking off his tie. He closed his eyes trying to calm down, but it seemed impossible. Anxiety had been tormenting him for almost a month now, and it didn’t seem like it would stop any time soon. He misses you. A lot. He just didn’t know how to function without that missing piece. Nothing was working right now, his head was always a mess, always going back to that night, trying to remember every moment he neglected you; he was trying to balance out his pain and stress to not mess up his relationship with Yunho as well; while also trying to balance out work as to not get fired, or at least not to piss off Jongho even more, but nothing is working. He misses you, and without you, nothing in him works.

______________________________________________________________

Chan was in the kitchen bar working; his heavy and expensive headphones sat on the top of his head while he was nodding along to the rhythm of his last track. He kept replaying it to try and figure out what was missing, what he could change or fix, but he just couldn’t concentrate. Flashbacks kept showing up in his head, replaying again and again, memories of his college days, memories of the time he fell in love with his now roommate and failed to do something about it.

It was the winter semester; the campus was covered in snow and everyone found refuge inside the library. Chan was planning to go there and work on a paper that was due that same night, but once he saw the amount of people inside the building, he decided he wouldn’t be able to work there. And just as he was about to leave, he saw Hongjoong sitting on a couch in the corner, next to him was something that made the producer’s mouth dry. A woman so beautiful his eyes couldn’t believe what they were seeing, his brain couldn’t comprehend what was happening, his feet moved on their own in that direction, he needed to talk to her, to know her name, to introduce himself. His friend got up as soon as he saw him, greeting him and introducing her. Y/n. That was her name, a name Chan would never be able to forget.

A friendship was established that day. You would start by hanging out with Hongjoong, going out to eat, watch a movie or to a party; but soon it became just the two of you. Hanging out at each other’s dorms, he showed you some of his music, and you showed him some of her stories; at first, he would walk you back to her room every night, but after some time you would stay over, “it’s easier” you said. One fateful night, Christopher finally made a move, giving you a quick peck on the lips while listening to your favourite artist’s latest album, the largest seconds of his life were right after, waiting for your reaction; you ended up fucking on top of his desk, pushing all his books, and cd’s to the floor.

That was the way the next months were spent, hanging out and finding any and every excuse to have sex, but never giving a title to what you were. Chan just assumed you weren’t ready for that kind of commitment, convincing himself he was fine with what you had, not admitting he was just too much of a coward to ask if you felt the same as him.

“I just don’t understand him, Jisung. One day he acts as if we were a couple, and the next he calls me his best friend. Friends don’t treat each other the way we do, friends don’t do what we do.”

“Maybe he isn’t ready for that kind of commitment, he would just rather stay as friends with benefits.” Jisung pat her on the back, trying to comfort her.

“But I don’t want to be just friends with benefits.” You pouted her lips.

“Hey, come on, don’t be sad. I'll tell you what, why don’t you come with me to Wooyoung’s party this Friday? You’ll have fun and forget, at least for a bit, about Chan.”

Christopher’s first mistake was introducing you to Jisung. The second one was allowing you to befriend him. And his last, but most fatal one was not going to that party. Why? Because Yunho and Mingi were there.

“Y/n, this my friend Mingi. Mingi, this is Y/n.” And just like that, it was over before it could even begin. That same night Mingi had introduced you to Yunho, and they both were heads over heels for you, they asked you to hang out the very next day and while at first you were confused as to how it would work, they won you over, pushing completely out the idea of Chan off your head.

He remembered the first time you talked about them, he thought you had just made out with one of them at the party, and while he wasn’t exactly happy about it, he could let it slide, no idea of what was about to come. Texts left unanswered; calls that went to voicemail; and long nights waiting for you to show up, but at some point, it became clear, that you were not just sleeping around with them, you were in love. That very same night he went out and got drunk out of his mind, only being able to get back home after Changbin and Minho found him trashed on a bench in front of their building. He blamed himself, if he hadn’t been so scared, if he had just tried, you would be his, and he promised himself that if that door ever opened again, he would be there. But as time went on, it became more apparent that would never happen… until now.

He kept repeating over and over to himself that you weren’t ready, that you still love them and that you were still mourning that relationship, but he couldn’t help himself, he wanted you.

The last month he had been in some kind of hell in heaven. When you first had shown up, he was pissed off beyond comprehension, how could they let this happen? How could they treat you like that? He had spent every second of his existence since he met you, loving and worshipping the ground you walk on and they had let you slip away? Unbelievable. But he couldn’t help but see the perks of all of this. He was the one to console you, to build you back up, and through the course of the weeks, you were better.

He would come back home to you cooking, greeting him the second he went in; you telling him about your day or a new show you were watching; you showed him your work and asked his opinion. Everything went back to how it was; it was even better. This is what he had been missing out all this time?

“Good morning, Channie.”

“Welcome back, Chan. I made some spaghetti; I hope you like it.”

“Hey, Chan. How was work?”

Oh, blissful domesticity. But everything was too good to be true. They would show up in the most subtle ways, in the middle of a conversation, in the notifications of your phone, even in the clothes you wore, they still smell like them; your ex-boyfriends were everywhere in his apartment, tormenting him. And, of course, he wasn’t blind, he could see it, your face still showed how heartbroken you were, and he could also hear it at night, small sobs escaped your mouth, whispering their names again and again.

Yunho…

Mingi…

Never his name.

______________________________________________________________

Jisung had just arrived home, his hands full of grocery bags balancing them while trying to open the door, and just as he was about to spill everything on the ground, a soft hand came to his rescue.

“Jesus, Sungie be careful.” The person behind him giggled.

“Y/n?” His eyebrows furrowed, confused, but he still leaned in and hugged you. “What are you doing here? How did you get in the building?”

“Oh, I live here now.”

“Mingi gave up his rent control apartment? Is he crazy?”

“Um… not exactly.” You scratched the back of your head.

“Okay, come inside and tell me what’s going on.”

…

“And that’s how I ended up living with Chan.” You took a small sip of the hot chocolate Jisung had prepared.

“Have you talked to them?”

You shook your head.

Jisung’s arms were folded against his chest, his eyes looking directly at yours, not sure what to say, “So it’s over between you and them?”

“I don’t know, Hannie. I love them, so much it hurts, but I don't think they feel the same way, they act as if I'm not even there, as if I'm not important to them.” You lay down on the kitchen table, controlling your breathing so you won't start crying.

“Well, that’s just not true.” He put his hand on top of your head, petting you, “Mingi can be an idiot sometimes and the same goes for Yunho, but they love you, baby. From the very first moment they met you, they have loved you, maybe they just lost their tracks for a moment, but they will come back to you.” He kissed you on the forehead, “and if for some reason they don’t, I will be there to help you pick up the pieces.”

______________________________________________________________

Minho arrived late at night, completely done with work and with stubborn patients who thought they knew more than him because they read an article on the internet. Jisung ran to the front door as soon as he heard the jiggling of the keys, ready to receive his grumpy husband. He accompanied him into the kitchen, where he served him a hot plate of his favourite food and told him about this day.

“I found the chips you like on sale so I bought a couple, I also bought the ingredients I was missing for that ramen you want to try, oh and I tried that juice I’ve been craving, but it wasn’t that good.” Minho couldn’t keep up with the number of things that came out of his husband’s mouth, but he was happy to listen. “Oh, oh my god I almost forgot, guess who I ran into?”

“Who?” He said while shoving a spoonful of soup into his mouth.

“Y/n, she broke up with Mingi and Yunho, and she’s staying with Chan.”

Minho choked, coughing aggressively, not believing the words that came out of Jisung’s mouth. Everything made sense now, that’s why the puppy-like doctor had been so miserable the last couple of weeks. And why Chan had been avoiding him lately. He got up and headed towards the door, “Give me a second, love I’ll be right back.”

He made his way down the hall, he was in no mood to do this, but it had to be done. He had witnessed first-hand how completely devastated had Chan been after you had broken his heart (not that he thinks you did it on purpose), how hard it was to get him to shower, to go to work, how long it took him to go back to normal, and he feared it would happen again. He pounded on the door, not caring if the neighbours next door complained. The door opened harshly, a sleep-deprived Christopher on the door side, looking at him as if he had grown to heads.

“Min, it’s two in the morning, what the hell are you doing here?”

The doctor grabbed him by the arm and shoved him into the wall next to the door, “You are going to explain to me exactly what you think you are doing.”

“I'm not doing anything. She’s my friend, I want to help her move…”

He interrupted, “What? Move on? Were you planning to be her saviour so she would fall in love with you? Bang Chan, she’s been engaged to them for almost a year now, they are just going through a rough patch…”

“They broke up.”

“They will get back together, it's more than obvious, they are in love.” He whispered yelling, he was worried, did Chan think he had a chance?

“They neglected her, Minho they took her for granted, I would…”

“Chan, listen to me, she’s not in love with you, whatever you two had it's over, it's been over for years, for Christ's sake.” He shook his shoulders, trying to get some sense into him.

“I know what I'm doing.”

“You clearly, don’t.” He pushed his friend back into his apartment and went back to his. His entire body ached, but anxiety filled his head, not letting him rest.

______________________________________________________________

“So, she finally dumped your ass, good for her honestly,” Minho said as he entered Yunho’s office. The latter one looked up at him, the look in his eyes completely dead. “Geez, you look like shit.”

“What do you want, Minho? I'm busy, I don’t have time for your bullshit.”

“I know where she is.”

“What?” Yunho looked at him with wide-open eyes. “Don’t you fucking dare lie to me about this.” He got up and grabbed Lee by the collar and shook him, “How the fuck do you know that?”

“Because I saw her.” Little white lie, but he technically did know where she was. He pushed him back, “I don’t like you, Yunho, at all. But I know what it's like to be in your shoes, so I’ll make you a deal, you get your shit together and I might just tell you where she is.”

______________________________________________________________

Yunho’s hands kept trembling, he had barely been able to drive home without crashing. He wanted to scream, to cry, to tell Mingi what Minho had told him, all at the same time, but he also thought, what would he say? How could he apologize? Would she take them back? He went into the house, Mingi was lying on the couch, a book in his hands and glasses sitting on his face, his eyebags and skin tone resembling his boyfriend’s, he turned to look at him, noticing how fidgety and dishevelled he looked.

“Are you okay? Did something happen at work?” He got up and approached Yunho, he grabbed his face in his hands and caressed his cheeks.

“Um…” he bit off some of the skin in his lip, not knowing how to deliver the news, his head couldn’t put the words together, not even able to process them. “Minho told me something today.”

“Ugh, that asshole. I don’t know how Jisung married that guy, he's such a nice guy and Minho is so…”

Yunho interrupted him, not able to hold it in any longer, “Minho says he knows where Y/n is staying.”

Mingi felt how the air left his body, all thoughts abandoning his mind in the same way, tears were quick to rush to his eyes, “What?”

“Yeah, he saw her and knows where she’s been staying.” He paused to order his next words, “And he said he will tell me if we manage to get our shit together.”

Mingi took him into his arms and squeezed him till he was out of breath, not being able to contain his happiness. Together they cried and smiled while the thought of everything going back to normal filled them, that was until something crossed their minds at the same time, would you even want them back?

______________________________________________________________

Tag list:

@tunaasan @scuzmunkie

Who. (3/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 2

“You remember the day we met?”

“How can I not? You were always running after me every chance you had.”

“Hey! I wanted to be your friend; I was a lonely child.”

Yunho and Mingi met when they were just children, on the playground, next to the swings. The younger one had been sitting on one of them, swinging his feet and looking at the ground, occasionally looking at the other children, wanting to play with them, but being too shy to ask. He had been there for a long time, until one of them pushed him off the swing, making him scratch the palm of his hands and the top of his knees on the ground, small teardrops started falling down his eyes, between the pain and the humiliation. He wanted to run back home and hide in his room until a small hand appeared in front of him.

“Are you okay?”

Mingi took the other boy’s hand, picking himself up and dusting his clothes off. “Yeah, thank you.”

The kid frowned, looking down at his scratched skin, “You are bleeding, come, my mom will clean you up.” He interlaced their fingers and made Mingi follow him.

And that’s how everything started. Mingi felt as if he owed Yunho for his kindness, so when he found out they went to the same school he made it his mission to follow him around everywhere he went, and while at first the older boy had thought it was a bit weird to have someone always on his tail, he quickly grew accustomed to it. They became a unit, there wasn’t one without the other, same group of friends, same schools, same everything; from children to hormonal teenagers, to young adults, and finally adults.

Yunho can’t remember when he started feeling the way he felt about Mingi, he just suddenly realised that the boy who had been next to him every day for the last twelve years made his cheeks turn red; that he would often find himself staring at him for long periods of times, admiring how much his features had changed from when they were children. He had lost all the baby fat in his face, a slimmer and sharper jawline, his piercing eyes had lost that innocent shimmer and now made his knees grow weak, and how pink and plump his lips were. Yunho wanted to die every day, knowing it wasn’t normal to think that way about his best friend, or any boy at all; crying himself to sleep wishing to wake up “normal”, luckily for him, his mom was a saint, and when she noticed her son’s feelings, she let him know that what he was feeling was completely okay and she would support him no matter what.

What he didn’t know was that Mingi was right in the same sport as he was. He had noticed the way his heart skipped a bit every time Yunho looked his way, how puffy his cheeks were and how the way he laughed made him look like a puppy, how nice his fingers looked when he was typing across the keyboard. He was in trouble, he feared rejection, he feared getting heartbroken, but amongst everything, he feared losing Yunho.

Funnily enough, all it took for their love to blossom was a shot of vodka and a game of spin the bottle, Yunho now cringes at the thought that their first kiss was drunk in front of their friends; Mingi finds it sweet—first kiss, first love, first everything. Mingi remembers Yunho’s face the first time they made love, his puffy cheeks reddening up, lips parted and small gasps left his throat, his lips swollen from making out; he looked ethereal. He remembers the way his boyfriend had been so gentle, so patient with him. Yunho remembers the way Mingi whispered sweet words of affirmation in his ear, telling him how much he loved him, and how good everything felt. And while the first may have been somewhat awkward, both truly inexperienced and nervous, it was a memory they were both fond of.

“You remember how you told me you loved me the first time?” Mingi giggled, laying his head on Yunho’s shoulder, leaning further down on the couch outside their apartment’s balcony. They were looking at the stars trying to distract themselves, feeling too anxious to do anything else.

“Oh god, please don’t remind me. I was such a fucking idiot.” He facepalmed himself, feeling the cringe cover his body.

“You came up to my house with a bouquet of lilies you stole from your neighbour’s garden, banged on my door, and when I opened the door, you just screamed, “Do you like me back?” No, I like you. No, do you want to be my boyfriend? No. Just, do you like me back?”

“I’m sorry, I was a little bisexual closeted teenager trying to confess to his best friend, I didn’t know there was formal etiquette to asking you out.”

Mingi let out another small laugh, taking Yunho’s face between his hands and leaned up for a kiss. Slow, gentle, full of love, just like how all of their relationship had been, until recently. They stayed silent for a little while, lost in their thoughts.

“Do you remember the day we met her?”

College days were blurred memories for both boys; too busy with law and med school, always stressed, always horny and always sleepy. That week Wooyoung had invited the couple to a party at his house, it had been the first time in months they had the time to have fun, so they eagerly accepted. The first task that night was getting drunk off their minds, the next one was to dance and chat all they could and the last one was to go back to the apartment and fuck each other's brains out, it sounded like a good plan. Only one thing got in their way, you.

Mingi had been sitting down on the armrest of an old and crusty couch, sipping on something someone had told him was “jungle juice”, a beverage that tasted like ass, but was getting him tipsy, so that was fine by him. He was looking around, trying to find his boyfriend in the crowd, when his eyes came across a view that had him questioning if what was before his eyes was real, or if he was just starting to hallucinate from the drink.

“Hey, Mingi! Haven't seen you in a while, where have you been, man?” Han side hugged me, and Mingi tried to focus on what he was saying, but he just couldn’t, not when you were right there. He prayed on the back of his head that you weren’t dating Jisung, “Oh, right, I'm sorry, babe. Y/n, this my friend Mingi. Mingi, this is Y/n.” He could hear his heartbeat in his ears, blood drowning the inside of his cheeks and air escaping his lungs, how does one talk again?

“Hi.” You smiled at him. He was done.

It would be a lie to say you were not feeling the same. The pain Chan had been leaving in your heart for the past months went away in a second, the weight being lifted off your shoulders. Jisung had pitied you the second he noticed the way you were looking at his friend, he didn’t know how to bring up the fact that Mingi wasn’t single, of course, that was until he saw he was looking at you the same way. Surprised and confused, he decided to excuse himself, not wanting to get involved in the potential mess.

You guys went outside, claiming the noise was overwhelming you, it was there where a tall figure crossed your way, going directly to your new friend. “Hey, baby.” The new stranger said, while leaning down and doing the same thing you’ve been wanting to do all night, Mingi kissed him back.

“Hi, love. I tried looking for you, but couldn’t find you.”

“I had to come outside, Seonghwa and San were becoming too much, and I'm tired. Do you want to leave?”

You stared at the ground, feeling your heart fall to your stomach, Of course, you had gone out to forget about one guy and another one had crushed you.

“Yunho, this is Y/n. Y/n this is my boyfriend, Yunho.”

Boyfriend, great. You never even had a chance.

You looked up, ready to say hello and get the hell out of there, but you made eye contact with him, and all of a sudden everything turned even more confusing in your head. Yunho’s eyes widened the second they saw yours, his heart stopped, and the spit in his throat made him choke. Easy to say, Mingi and Yunho didn’t leave that party as they planned, they spent hours and hours with you, getting to know you, making you laugh, flirt with you… Jisung had come back, ready to leave when the scene in front of him had completely startled him. There you were, in between the two men, one of them devouring your mouth like there was no tomorrow while the other one groped your hips and sucked on your neck. Han is a good friend because even though he wanted to leave after fighting with Minho, he decided to wait for you, wanting you to have a good time and forget about Chan, so he spent the next hours going and coming back to see if you were done. Finally, you were done and gone with two new numbers on your phone and the promise of a date the next day.

“I was so scared that night,” Yunho confessed for the first time.

Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed, “why?”

“Well, yeah we both made out with her that night, but I knew I liked her the second I saw her, I wanted something more, but I didn’t want to lose you, and I didn’t even know how that would work.”

“We acted as if we knew what the hell we were doing, like some experts in polyamorous relationships.” The lawyer grinned, “I was also worried she would wake up the next morning and completely forget about us, or just see us as a one-time thing.”

Both smiled at the idea that that didn’t happen, but it turned sour the second they remembered that while they had managed to get you, they had also managed to lose you.

“I miss her, Min.”

“Don’t worry, Yuyu. We’ll bring her back home, I promise.” He wanted to reassure his partner, but the same he was nervous, could they?

____________________________________________

“Oh my god, Chan! I’m so happy for you.” You threw your hands around him, shaking him around excitedly.

“It's not that big of a deal, Y/n.” His cheeks turned red.

“It’s not a big deal? Chan, you finally got that promotion you’ve been waiting for years, this is huge!” You jumped around, making Chan laugh, “We have to celebrate, let's go out tonight, I’ll call Jisung.” She skipped to her room, not waiting for Chan’s answer.

You always made him special, like everything he did was amazing, and his heart couldn’t help but feel warm and heavy in his chest. It had been a little bit more than two and a half months since you had appeared on his doorstep, and his head had been going to the same place again and again the last few days, would it be okay if he tried anything? He didn’t expect you to answer right away or to even like him back, but he could still hope. He had noticed that in the last weeks, you had stopped crying, you stopped looking at your phone every five minutes or at every notification that popped up, and you stopped mentioning them all together, could you be moving on? This and more questions circled his head as he finished getting ready, he had taken a shower and chosen an outfit that didn’t consist of an oversized hoodie and baggy shorts; he needed all the luck and advantage he could get. He was wearing his favourite black combat boots, some black ripped skinny jeans, the ones that hugged his legs and ass just right (according to Changbin), a black crop top that Han had gifted him, claiming “it was a crime the world had never seen his abs in one of those”, but he had never worn it due to being too shy, a jean jacket and a bunch of black and silver jewellery adorning his hands, wrists, ears and neck, his hair straighten and slicked back, opposed to his usual messy curls.

He had just come out of his room, when you ran into him, “Jesus Christ, Chan, you look so good.” Your eyes were everywhere on his body, but his eyes. Chris couldn't help but feel a bust of confidence.

“You don’t look half bad.” You were wearing a tight black leather skirt with a blue spaghetti strap lace top (it was Mingi’s favourite outfit on you, it gave you confidence, and made you feel good about yourself, but Chan didn’t have to know that), on your neck was his favourite necklace, the one he had been wearing and had left on the bathroom counter, right before taking a shower and you had found. “You are wearing my necklace.” He gulped, and he scolded himself in his head, why was he acting like a hormonal teenager all of a sudden? You did weird things to his head.

“Oh yeah, I was going to give it to you, but it looked good with my outfit, I hope you don’t mind.” You batted your eyes at him, trying to look cute so he didn’t make you take the jewellery off.

His mouth dried up. Fuck, Chris, get it together, he thought. “I don’t, it’s okay.”

You smiled brightly at him, “I’m ready, I’ll just go and put my shoes on. Can you go get Jisung meanwhile?”

He nodded and turned around, hyping himself up the entire way to your friend’s apartment.

____________________________________________

“You said she would be here, Minho,” Yunho said, they were standing in front of Chan’s door.

“I didn’t know they were going out tonight, calm down Jeong.”

“Jisung didn’t tell you he was going out with them?”

Minho sighed, exasperated with the couple, “I forgot, okay? Besides now you know where she is, you can come back another time and…” Mingi was quick to cut him off.

“No, I'm not leaving until I see her. I've been going crazy for months and I’m not going without talking to her.” He sat down on the floor, next to the door, “I'm waiting here until they come back.”

Minho looked at him in disbelief, “You can not stay there, they’ll be gone for hours, and you might freak out some of the neighbours.

Mingi simply shrugged, looking down at the floor.

Minho turned to look at Yunho, wanting him to do something about his partner, but he was already sitting down next to him. “You cannot be serious.”

“We are not leaving until we see her. End of story.”

Minho threw back his head, exhausted and annoyed with their stubbornness, “Suit yourselves.” He disappeared down the hall.

____________________________________________

Han looked at Chan while he looked at her, the memory of their college relationship popped into his head. He remembers consoling you, trying to mend your broken heart as best as he could; he remembered why you ended things, why you moved on, how you did it. He also remembers finding out about Chan’s feelings, that same night Minho went to pick him up after he passed out drunk. He remembered feeling guilty for introducing you to them, for not having a clue Chan reciprocated your feelings.  And tonight, he couldn't help, once again, but feel bad for the producer, if only he had said something, would things be different now?

“I didn't know you still felt that way about her…” Jisung said as he took a sip of his drink.

Chan looked at the floor, and shook his head, “Did Minho tell you?”

“He didn’t have to.”

____________________________________________

Minho couldn’t sleep. He kept turning and tossing in his bed, and no, it wasn’t the lack of his husband next to him, it was the pair of idiots down the hall that crowded his head. He couldn’t help, but feel bad for them, having been in the same situation as them, lost, heartbroken, fearing the uncertainty his relationship had been a few years ago. He wanted to ignore so badly that feeling in his gut, telling him to help them, but he just couldn’t, so he got up from the bed and made his way, once again, down to Chan’s apartment.

There they were, asleep. Mingi was lying on Yunho’s shoulder covering it in drool, while the other one had a look of discomfort on his face, even asleep he could feel how uncomfortable was the wall he was leaning against.

Minho crouched down, shaking his fellow rival doctor by the shoulder, “Jeong, wake up.” He whispered, “Come on, idiot. I don’t have all day.”

Yunho opened his eyes, at first alarmed, but then confused. Y/n wasn’t there, why was he being awoken?

“Be quiet, I'm taking you there, get up.” He got up, ready to walk away, “Hurry up and don’t wake up Mingi. I certainly don’t need two idiots in my car, and I doubt she wants to see you both,”

____________________________________________

Taglist:

@tunaasan @scuzmunkie @jeongwangjessmina @certifiedmoa @tenebrisirae @ddaeing @bratty-tingz @myshadowsbackstage @berryfiavoured @jkookiejiminlvr @yunsara @soobiverse @kyeos4ng @asjkdk @popcatx0

Who. (4/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Green, blue and red lights light up the entire place, there´s so much noise you can barely hear Chan and Han over the music, and the smoke machines uncomfortably fill your lungs, but none of that is enough to keep your thoughts away from the ones your heart yearns for.

Yeah, the last couple of weeks had been better, you had stopped drowning in your tears and the insomnia that had accompanied you every night for the last weeks seemed to finally abandon your side, but their presence remained there, stuck to your head, leaching off your pain, as if it was determined to not let you forget. Were they okay? Had they moved on? Did they even care?

Your mind kept going back to simpler times, memories of what once had been the strongest relationship you had ever been in.

The bed was a mess, sheets ruffled next to the TV, clothes were scattered everywhere, pillows laid under your knees so you wouldn’t get hurt while you rode Mingi, hips moving up and down without rhythm, desperate to reach that sweet release, but every single time you were close Yunho grabbed your hips firmly stopping your movements.

“You are not allowed to cum baby, not until Mingi does first.” You tried to focus on the man in front of you, blush covering his cheeks, his mouth was barely opened, small moans and groans kept escaping out of his throat, eyes clouded with pleasure, his eyebrows furrowed every time you went down his cock, lips swollen and pink from all the kissing. Mingi was the most sinful image you had ever seen, and you were desperate to make him feel good.

“Please, please, Yunho, please let me cum.” You threw your head back, licking your lips, your knees were cramping, but stopping would be so much worse, “I’ve been a good girl.”

“No, I don’t care how good it feels, you are not allowed to cum.” His fingers traced a path down your body, caressing and massaging your neck, making their way through your breasts pinching your nipples and twisting them, next was your sternum, your stomach, till they finally ended in your core. Two of them framed Mingi’s cock while he was still inside you. “Come on, baby. You can do better than that, you are barely moving.” He took you by the chin with his other hand, straightening your view, “Don’t you want our Princess to feel good?”

Mingi’s eyes were covered in tears, his breathing heavy and his cheeks strawberry red, his hands grabbing your hips helping you move faster, “Please, love, please make me cum.” You couldn’t resist. No matter how much your thighs were crying, no matter how sore you’d be tomorrow, you were determined.

“Good job, baby. You are such a good girl.” Yunho whispered in your ear, while kissing your shoulders, leaving small bite marks on them.

And not so happy times.

Mingi’s phone was going crazy. Texts and calls from the office kept coming up, distracting him from the task he was currently performing. His head was in between your legs, his lips and tongue messily lapping up at your core, fingers hastily going and out of you; and physically he was there with you, mentally you knew he was only thinking about work. Your fiancé was usually so good at making you come with his mouth, but right now you barely even felt good, his tongue was not good enough knowing he wasn’t there with you.

“Mingi, please, they can wait for a little while.” You begged him, caressing his headlocks, trying to bring him back to you.

“Yeah, yeah, let’s just make this quick, I don’t want to piss off Jongho.” He was talking about it as if it was a chore, or another job, that did it for you.

You closed your legs and sat down immediately, pushing him away, “Never mind. Go and take care of whatever it is.” You put on your robe, leaving to go to the bathroom. He didn't even try to stop you.

There, you looked at yourself in the mirror, full-on makeup done, your hair styled and a set of lingerie (you had spent more than an hour trying to figure out how to put it on), you had outdone yourself so one of them would notice you, so one of them would want you like you wanted them, but of course, everything else was more important, more urgent. You felt your relationship hanging by a threat, and they had no clue.

.

You had been weak a couple of days ago, not being able to sleep, you decided to do something to appease the anxiety that had been running through your veins for hours.

“Hello?” A groggy voice responded from the other side.

You gulped down, already regretting your decision, “Hey, Hongjoong?”

You heard ruffling, and his voice got clearer, “Oh my god Y/n, is that you? Where are you? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay, don’t worry. Um… listen, um…” You couldn’t bring yourself to ask, too scared of the way he might react.

“You want to know how they are doing, don't you?”

You stayed quiet, the lump in your throat made it impossible for anything to come out.

“Well, it took almost a week for us to know you had left, neither of them said anything until Jongho went to your apartment wanting to know why Mingi wasn’t answering his phone or showing up to work. But the first time I saw them they were a wreck, the house was a complete mess, both of them sleeping in different rooms, Yunho barely came home and Mingi wouldn’t leave it. They looked so sick I almost didn’t recognize them, pale, heavy eyebags, and the smell, ugh the smell.” He chuckled sadly, shaking his head at the thought, “I had never seen them like that.”

“You must hate me.” You whispered tears threatening to slip out of your eyes, but you wouldn’t let them, you were just so tired of that.

“At first, I was confused, I didn’t know what was happening or why, but they explained everything and I couldn’t blame you. I wasn’t happy to see them like that, but I knew you must not have been any better.”

“Yeah.”

…

“So, how’s Chan been?”

You stuttered not knowing what to say.

“Oh Y/n we’ve been friends since middle school, you think I wouldn't know? Hell, I don’t even know how it hasn’t crossed their mind, you always go back to Chan.”

“Nothing’s going on with him.”

“I never said it was.”

You pulled on the thin skin of your lips, tearing it apart, slowly the taste of iron covered your tongue; your heart was beating a thousand miles per second and you ran out of things to say. Hongjoong kept telling you about them, how things had been in their friend group, and everyone’s reactions, it didn’t do much to soothe your fragile muscle, but at least it was something.

“Sooner or later, you’ll have to face them, Y/n.”

“I don’t think I’m ready for that.”

.

A pair of fingers kept snapping in front of your face, Han called your name repeatedly, “Y/n, Y/n, oh my god Y/n,” Snap, snap, snap, “Jesus, Y/n snap out of it already.”

You shook your head, your eyes focusing on the cherry-checked boy. “I’m sorry, I was thinking about… work.”

His eyes narrowed, looking at you incredulously, “Yeah, sure, whatever you say babe. Chan went to the bar to get us some shots.”

“Great.”

“What's going on with you? An hour ago, you were so excited to go out, and now look at you.”

“It’s nothing Jisung…” He cut you off

“Oh, you can't fool me, Y/n. I know what you are thinking about, who you are thinking about. You need a distraction, something to help you move on.”

“Is not that easy.”

“I know, believe me I know, but maybe a little push will help you.”

“Help as in therapy?”

“Mmm, I was thinking for more like a good fuck.”

Your eyes widened, cheeks burning with shame, “Han, what the fuck?”

“Oh, as if you don’t miss getting dicked down, you went from two dicks to zero in a second, I can’t imagine being that starved.” He giggled taking a sip from his beer.

“I'm not having this conversation with you.” You pushed him away, shaking your head and laughing.

“Right, because you can tell me all about how Yunho’s dick is the biggest you’ve ever had or how Mingi’s head game is so good he almost made you pass out, but this is where you draw the line. Common Y/n, you are not doing anything wrong, you are a gorgeous, single woman, it’s only natural to get back into the game.”

A single woman. You haven’t been one in years. It felt so wrong to think of yourself as one, but it is what it is.

“How about Chan?”

You were taken back, not believing what came out of Jisung’s mouth. “You cannot be serious.”

“Why not? He’s hot, you guys used to do it all the time, it’s not like he’s a stranger.”

“Yeah, back in college, I haven’t looked at Chan in that way in years.”

“You are full of shit. You think I didn't see you back at his apartment? You were practically fucking him with your eyes, he looks good and you know it.”

  Your cheeks got impossibly red, making your muscles hurt, “I did not…”

“You did, and that’s okay. Give yourself a chance, love. You never know what might happen.

The thought of actually doing it crossed your mind, could you do it? Could you let yourself into another's arms while someone else was on your mind?

Chan appeared with two handfuls of shot glasses, walking slowly towards your table, “I think I might have overestimated how much we can drink.”

“Oh, this is nothing, remember how much we used to drink back then? I don’t remember half the parties I went to.”

“I’m not sure that’s a good thing. Besides, we are older Hannie, I don’t think we can do it.” You said looking at all the alcohol in front of you.

“We can always try.” He said taking his first shot.

____________________________________________

“Han is your husband.”

“Yes Jeong, you were at our wedding against my will. What about it?” Minho’s eyes stayed firm on the road.

“I just can’t help but wonder how such a pure, innocent and gentle soul ended up with the devil?”

Minho grinned, shaking his head, “I like to think we balance each other out.” The car took a turn, “But I could ask you the same thing, what is the human embodiment of a cupcake doing with Dr Jeong biggest asshole in the neurology department Yunho, and well, Mingi.”

“Well, for one I'm not always an asshole,” Yunho chuckled, “and the rest was pure luck I guess.”

“I think she’d beg to differ.” The cat-eyed doctor looked at him for the first time since the ride started, “What happened anyways?

An uncomfortable silence filled the car, Yunho sighed and let his head rest against the car window.

“I got too much into my head, and so did Mingi. Work was killing me, bills began piling up and I couldn’t do much, so I started working double shifts, taking small jobs here and there. Mingi’s clients needed lots of things at the same time, they lost a case, I don’t know, I guess everything got too hectic too quickly. We would leave early in the morning, I wouldn’t come home for days, and Mingi would arrive late at night. We both were so stressed but couldn’t do anything about it, it bottled up.” His voice was cracking up, barely able to continue, “We just never stopped, we never noticed how badly we were neglecting her until it was too late.” He paused, letting out a sob, “One day, I came home, just a quick stop to take a shower and say hi, the second I stepped foot I knew something was wrong. She had taken all her things; her ring was right on the bed.” He shut his eyes, furrowing his eyebrows, remembering the scene, “My whole world came crashing down, Minho. I have never felt so much pain.”

“Yeah, been there done that.”

“What?” Yunho looked at him confused.

“You aren’t the only one who’s a workaholic.” Minho took a deep breath, “Back in college things between Han and me were not so good, we were always fighting, always so hostile and short with each other. I’ll admit it was mostly my fault, school got worse each day, I was struggling to keep my scholarship, my job at the café, Jisung; competing against you the entire time didn’t help.”

“Hey, man you did that to yourself, I showed up the first day of school and I already had a rival, and I’ll admit I liked the competition until you started being a real asshole to me and till this day I have yet to know why you hate me so much. At first, I thought it was because I’m just a better doctor, but…” He said with humour before Lee cut him off.

“You are not a better doctor than me, you dick.” The older doctor said, “I was taking the piss when we were students, it used to motivate me, but I didn’t hate you because of that, I just didn’t like you, but I don’t hate you.”

“Because…”

Minho gulped, was it his place to say it? “Back then…”

“Back then when Chan and Y/n were a thing?”

He furrowed his eyebrows, confused and shocked, “Wait, you knew about it?”

“Oh, it was obvious, Chan hated us the second he met us, I knew it wasn’t just a coincidence, also your husband tends to spill out his brain when he’s drunk.”

“Yeah, that’s Jisung for you.” He said while shaking his head and smiling, the thought of his drunk husband warmed his heart. “I almost lost him back then. One day, in the middle of a discussion, he told me he was done with my bullshit, he was tired of me taking him for granted and never being there. In the beginning, I thought it was just another argument, and that things would go back to normal in a couple of days, but after a week I knew I was wrong. I felt like an idiot for waiting an entire week, he didn’t want to see me, I tried everything, and even Y/n hated me, it took me months to gain back his trust. There were times when I thought I was just too little, too late, that he would never take me back, and thank god he did, I don’t know what I would have done if he didn’t.”

“Is that why you are helping us?”

“I don’t like you, Yunho, that I’ll admit, but I know you are not a bad guy, neither is the other guy, and I know you love her. I get what’s like to lose yourself and everything you have, in a second.”

____________________________________________

Your hips swayed at the rhythm of the music, you let yourself go and try to forget. You deserve it. Jisung was next to you, dancing drunkenly, giggling and saying a bunch of random stuff you could barely understand. One second you saw him pointing at something behind him and the next one he was gone. You were left alone with Christopher.

“Are you having a good time?” He whispered in your ear, dangerously close to you. When had he gotten so close?

“Yeah, are you?”

“I think I had too many shots.” He giggled. Yeah, he was so drunk.

“Me too.” You laughed along.

You kept dancing next to each other, occasionally getting pushed by the rest of the crown on the dance floor, with every step you came closer, and before you knew it, your chest pressed against his. Slowly move your hips against each other, his hands grabbed your hips, and your head rested against his skin. You didn’t dare look up, you knew what would happen and you didn’t know if you were ready for that, or even if your head was in the right place for that; yet, you still had an itch for it.

And as if Chan was reading your mind, he lifted your chin with his fingers, making you look him straight in the eyes. So many moments and memories flood your mind, blurred scenes of your “relationship” back in college, could you go back to that?

His face came closer, and his lips whispered your name against yours. And once again, you let yourself go.

Everything happened so quickly, that your head could not register what was going on. A hand had grabbed yours, pulling you roughly, making you crash into someone, Chan looked upset and confused. You turned around and saw him, his eyes were furious, you could see his lips moving but didn't understand anything that was coming out of them. Those lips that you had been missing for months, those eyes that appeared in your dreams again and again.

“Yunho?”

____________________________________________

Taglist:

@tunaasan @scuzmunkie @jeongwangjessmina @certifiedmoa @tenebrisirae @ddaeing @bratty-tingz @myshadowsbackstage @berryfiavoured @jkookiejiminlvr @yunsara @soobiverse @kyeos4ng @asjkdk @popcatx0 @yunho-leeknow @escape-from-realitys-stuff @thedistractedwriter @vsereniasstuff @sundayysunshine @queen-thiccness @toomuchtellyneck @daemon-bunny @hyuk4ngel @rxnexxi

Who (5/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

NOTES: This was a nightmare to write, between the holidays and writer’s block, I wanted to die. I hope you like it. If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee . I promise next chapter will contain SMUT, so beware of that.

“What are you doing, Y/n?” Said Yunho as soon as he dragged you out of the club.

“What are YOU doing, Yunho? How the fuck did you know I was here?” You stumbled backwards, anxiety and alcohol are not a good combo.

“I came to talk, Minho brought me here. I have spent every single day of the last three months trying to find and talk to you, and all this time you were doing this?” Hurt in his voice, his face red and eyes glossy. You examined him for a second, deep dark eyebags sunken his eyes, his lips cracked and pale, and his once broad chest now looked thinner, bony. He looked so different, you almost couldn’t recognize him.

“It’s not like that…” He cut you off.

“Then, how is it? Because to me it looked like you were making out with your so-called best friend. Explain it to me, Y/n.”

“I don’t have to explain shit to you.” You stomped, getting closer, “You have a lot of nerve coming in here and accusing me of anything,” You jabbed your finger against his chest again and again. “We are not together. You drove me away. You broke my heart.” Tears of anger streamed down your face, and your wounded heart disintegrated with each word.

“I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry, please come home with me, we can talk and…”

You turned around when you heard Han coming out of the club, Minho right behind him, following a very angry-looking Christopher.

“Bang Chan, calm down!” Said Minho.

“What are you doing here, Jeong?” Chan intervened, pushing you behind him.

“This doesn’t concern you, Chan. Please let me talk to her.” He tried going past Chris.

“Why don’t you leave her alone? She doesn’t want to see you. Fuck off.” Chan’s voice laced with venom, alcohol and rage ran through his veins, clouding his judgment.

“Chan.” The taller man tried again.

“Fuck you, Yunho. Where were you before when she needed you, huh?” Chris pushed the taller man, “Where were you when she spent every single night crying herself to sleep?” Push. “Where were you when she felt worthless?” Push.

“Chan, stop. You are drunk.” Han said.

“That’s right. You were not there, but guess who was? Me. I spent every single minute comforting her, reassuring her that it was not her fault, and helping her move on.”

“Oh, I am well aware of how much you would love for her to get over us, I’ve known it for a long time.” Yunho pushed back, “But I’ll be dead the day I let that happen.”

“Yunho, please stop.”

“I fucked up, okay? I’m not saying I didn’t, but I want to fix it. If I have to get on my knees I will, if I have to beg I will, whatever you want me to do I’ll do it. Please give me a chance.” Yunho said kneeling.

“Yunho.” You said in tears.

Chan scoffed, shaking his head, “Why should you get a second chance?”

Minho physically cringed, he knew it wasn’t about Yunho and Mingi getting a chance to redeem themselves, it was about Chan not getting the same opportunity.

“Chan, buddy, please back off.” He said while grabbing his friend by the shoulders.

Chan shook him off. He looked at you, “Y/n you know best. Please don’t go back to them.” He pleaded with what little strength he had left. But you could only see a begging Yunho on the floor, a mix of emotions reflected in your eyes, anger, fear, but on top of them was longing. He could feel his heart break all over again, he would never be at the receiving of those feelings. The door had closed a long time, and even if you didn’t know it, he did, it would never open again. He needed to get away from the scene. A knot forming in his throat, all his bottled-up love dying in his chest, he was going to throw up.

“Y/n, please come home, we can talk, we won't pressure you or anything, just please, please come home.” Yunho extended his hand your way.

You turned to look at Chan, but he no longer was there. You found Jisung’s eyes, looking for an answer in them. On one hand, your heart craved him, wanting nothing more than for him to take you in his arms. But then the more rational part of your brain reminded you of the hell you went through in the last months. Could you go back to them? And if not, could you live without them? Your best friend looked you in the eyes, worry and uncertainty filled them, but in the end, he simply nodded.

Yunho was waiting for you, silently begging for you to take his hand, to come back to them. And when you finally did, you could see the way his entire body relaxed, you couldn’t blame him, a part of you also felt at peace after all this time.

“This doesn’t mean we are back together; I hope you know that.” You whispered to him.

“I know.” He looked around for Minho, “We are taking a cab, I don’t want to bother you anymore.” He nodded back.

Jisung approached and gently embraced you in his arms. “Call me, okay?”

“Hannie, about Chan…” He cut you off.

“Don’t worry about him, we’ll take care of that.” He gave you a weak smile, before turning to his husband.

-------------------------------------------------------

Yunho opened the door as soon as the cab arrived, sat next to you and told the driver where to go. Your heart was almost beating out of your chest, sweaty hands gripped the ends of your skirt, and eyes that didn’t dare look away from the window.

“Are you cold?” He said, already taking his jacket off to give it to you.

“No, no, I’m okay.” Your brain made a connection a second later, “Wait, where’s…”

His phone went off like crazy, texts and calls showed up all at the same time, he pulled out of his pocket revealing the contact, “Shit.” He pressed to answer.

“Hey, Mingi, did you…” You could hear the exasperated voice of the younger man behind the phone, not being able to make out what he was saying.

“No, Mingi, I’m…” Cut off again.

“I know, but please…” Again.

“Will you …” And again.

You couldn’t help but laugh a little bit. Oh, how you missed them.

“Mingi, will you please just shut up?” He whispered, “Listen, go home, I’m on my way there.”

Mumbling.

“You can leave, umm she’s, umm she’s with me.” He said as if he couldn’t believe the words coming out of his mouth.

Mumbling.

“Go home, we’ll meet you there.” He hung up.

An uncomfortable silence filled the car, you didn’t know where to look, or what to do or say. Yunho was in a similar situation. Twice you caught him almost putting his hand on your knee, before remembering the situation you were in, muscle memory it must have been.

You knew the streets on your way to their place, left turn here, right turn there. A convenience store you used to walk to late at night to get ramen when you couldn't sleep. A dog park they swore you would go to with a new puppy when things “calmed down” at work. It made your heart sink to remember what you used to be, what you used to have.

So lost in your head, you didn’t notice the ride had ended, Yunho handed the driver some money and immediately took your hand, getting out of the car. The nerves getting worse each second, you could feel yourself shaking. The alcohol in your stomach bubbling threatening to make its way back up.

And then you saw Mingi.

He was sitting outside the door, his head between his knees, gently rocking himself back and forth, and you could hear some mumbling but couldn’t quite get what he was saying. He looked so small, so fragile, and while it wasn’t your fault, you couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty. Without thinking you approached him, kneeling by his side.

“Hello, Mingi.” You whispered.

He had been so into his thoughts he almost fell back when he heard you. His chest went up and down quickly, trying not to choke on the anxiety, his eyes doubting who they were seeing, but he tried to compose himself. “Hey, Y/n.” His hands shifted, but he tensed to prevent them from touching you, not wanting to make you uncomfortable.

A few moments went by, neither of you knowing what to say. “Why don’t we go in? We have a lot to talk about and it's freezing cold out here.” You had almost forgotten Yunho was also there.

“Okay.”

-------------------------------------------------------

Minho and Jisung didn’t have a clue what to say on the ride back home. Chan was in the backseat, His head resting against the window, small tears threatening to come out of his eyes, but he wouldn’t let them, not until he was sure no one would see him.

“Chan.” Jisung tried.

“Don’t, just don’t.”

“Chan, you know this is for the best. They need to solve whatever is going on…” Minho started but was quickly cut off by the older man.

“And you were so eager to help them do that, weren’t you?”

“Chan, that’s not…”

“Leave it alone, Minho. You’ve done enough.”

Jisung didn’t want to give up just yet, “Channie, please. Minho would never do anything to hurt you, but you know she’s still in love with them, and…”

“Don’t you think I know that? I have seen it every single day for the last few months. I have seen her cry every goddamn night because she missed them. I’ve seen her reading their conversations again and again. Hell, I have heard everything single fucking detail about those two, I did it then and I did it now. But tonight, for a single moment in almost six years, she didn’t think about them, she didn’t see them in me, it was only me and her. She kissed me. She wanted me. For once, she was mine again.”

Minho felt bad for what was about to come from his lips, but it needed to be done, “Then why did she leave with Yunho?” The car stopped.

And Chan got off, slamming the door on his way out.

-------------------------------------------------------

­The three of you were sitting on the floor of the living room. Yunho was leaning against an old couch Seonghwa had gifted you when you all moved in together. Mingi was next to a shabby coffee table you used to use as an “everything” table when you couldn’t afford anything else. You haven’t lived here in months, yet it still felt like home.

You had rehearsed thousands of times what you would say to them if you ever were in this situation. All the things that they did or said that made you die on the inside, you would cry and scream all you wanted and they would have to listen. You would tell Yunho how much you hated how cold he had turned. Tell Mingi how tired you were of him always coming home in a bad mood. Tell them how much you had missed them emotionally, and also physically, how they hadn’t stopped to look at you in months, let alone even touched you.

But as opposed to all the scenarios in your head, your mouth was dry.

“I’m sorry.” Mingi was the first who dared to speak, you wouldn’t have been able to hear him if you weren’t sitting next to him. “I’m so sorry about everything we did, I’m sorry for taking you for granted, I’m sorry about neglecting you, I’m sorry I was not there when you needed me, I’m sorry for not listening, I’m sorry for making you leave, I’m sorry for…” And so, the word vomit began, it came laced with months and months of tears Mingi didn’t know he had yet to spill.

“Okay, okay. Mingi, calm down.” You moved closer to him, wiping his cheeks.

“Nothing’s okay if you are not here, Y/n. I’m not okay if you are not here, Yunho is not either.” He pointed to Yunho.

You turned to look at the taller man, only to find him in an equal or worse state than the man in front of you, “I’m so sorry, my love.” He said between gasps.

Seeing them like this was enough to put you in the same state.

“I miss you so much, Y/n,” Yunho said while coming close to you. Both of them surrounded you, trapping you between their arms and sobs. “I’m sorry for being an asshole, for not making you my priority.”

“We will do anything, whatever you want you’ve got it, just please don’t leave again, please,” Mingi begged.

“Okay, let's talk, please?”

They both nodded and so the night began.

-------------------------------------------------------

“You have to talk to me about how you are feeling, you cannot bottle up and expect me to be okay with not knowing what’s going on in your life.” You said leaning against the couch, playing with Mingi’s fingers.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to trouble you.”

“It doesn’t bother me. Yeah, I may not know all those fancy law terms you and Jongho use all the time,” He giggled, “but I want to know if things are going well, if you are having trouble with a client or if you are stressed about a case, and not find out by Jongho calling me to tell me how much of an asshole you are being at work.”

He groaned, “That fucking brat always tells on me.”

“And you,” You looked at Yunho, “when are going to stop that childish rivalry with Minho? You are both grown adults, he’s married and you are engaged, for god’s sake.” You spoke without thinking.

“I’m still engaged?” He looked at you, a little smirk on his face.

“You know what I mean.” You nudged slightly. Mingi was looking at you with the same look on his face, making you blush deeply.

Between laughs and memories, Yunho’s bright look decomposed. His eyebrows furrowed and his lips tightened in a line, he straightened himself and cleared his throat, “There is one thing I want to talk about.”

Both of you looked at him.

“Back at the club, and I know I don’t have any kind of right to complain, but,” He gulped, “What is going on with Chan.”

Oh, right. That.

“Um…, I…, um…” Trying to find the right words. Mingi straightened himself, confused about what Yunho was talking about.

“We won’t be mad; I only want to know if something is going on.”

“Well, um…, Han noticed I was a little distracted tonight, he knew I was still thinking about you two. And until that point, I didn’t know if we were over for good. So…” You scratched your eyebrow, “he suggested it may be time to move on, and that Chan could help me with that.” You mumbled that last part.

Silence.

“I thought Jisung liked us,” Mingi said, trying to lighten up the situation.

“And he does, he was just trying to be a good friend to me.”

“Did something else happen?” Yunho said directly. He needed to know.

You shook your head, “No, it was barely even a kiss.”

“If I hadn’t been there to stop it, would it have turned into anything else?”

“Yunho.” Mingi tried to stop him.

“It’s not fair of you to ask me that.”

“So, it would have.”

“Yunho.” Mingi tried again.

“I don’t know, okay? I have no clue what would have happened.” Your voice escalated.

“Did you think about it?” He kept going.

“What?”

“Did you ever think about doing it? Tonight, or any other night?”

“Okay, that’s enough. You have no fucking right to reproach me for anything, we are not together.” You got up, needing to get away from him.

“I have spent every single night crying myself to sleep because you are not here, Y/n. It hasn't even crossed my mind to move on from you.” He stood up.

“Don’t act like I’m the one who fucked up like I cheated or something.” You grabbed your bag and pulled down your skirt, “This was a mistake, I never should have come here.”

That’s when Mingi saw red sirens in his head, “No, no Y/n, please. Yunho, calm down. Please, let’s calm down.” The poor thing was a mess.

“I’m not going to stay here to hear him accusing me of things that never happened.”

“Yunho’s sorry, tell her you didn’t mean it.”

Yunho’s shoulder slumped, defeated, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said. It’s… When I saw you two, I thought I had lost you. I saw all my fears from back in college coming true.”

“What fears?”

He looked at Mingi, who only nodded back. “Back when we had just started dating, we were a bit worried you felt like this relationship was… too much. You would want something more conventional. A relationship where people wouldn’t turn their heads to know why three people are holding hands and kissing. Or one where you didn’t have to answer, how does it work? Over and over again.” His voice cracked at the end.

Mingi took over, “You never told us about Chan, we found out because Jisung talked about it once when he was drunk. We worried there was something else there, some unresolved feelings, I don’t know. And that someday you would go back to him. Throughout the years that fear dissolved, but when we knew you were staying with him. Well, we didn’t know what to think.”

“Whatever I had with Chan ended the day I met you, I’ve only wanted you since that night. Why didn’t you talk to me?”

“As you’ve seen, we are not the best at communication.” Yunho let out a nervous laugh. “I’m so sorry, for all the things I said. It wasn’t my place to ask.”

You got closer to him, “I’m sorry for getting so defensive.” You took his face in your hands, caressing his lip with your thumb, “I love you, Yunho.”

“I love you too.”

“And I love you.” You said taking Mingi’s hand in yours, “but I want you both to understand things are not completely okay because I’m here. I need to know what I’m getting myself into, I can’t go back to feeling like that. I need to be sure it won’t happen again, I get you both being busy, but neglecting me is a whole other story. We’ll go step by step, okay?”

“Can I kiss you?”

“Mingi, we talked about going slow.”

“I know, I know. I can’t believe you are back here.” He leaned closer, “so, can I?”

And you may be aching,

“Yes, please.” You whispered against his lips.

But you were also weak.

____________________________________________

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Who (6/?) J. Y & S. M

Pairing: Poly! Jeong Yunho x reader x Song Mingi

Genre: Angst, Smut

Warnings: This content is for a mature audience

Synopsis: You can't remember when was the last time you spent time with them, the last "I love you", the last time any of them kissed you.

Author's notes: It's been such a long time, and I'm sorry for that. Life hasn't been quite easy, but as an apology here's some smut. Hope you enjoy.

Other chapters: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee ☕

It had been a couple of weeks since that night, and getting used to being back wasn’t quite as easy as you thought it would be. At first feeling like a stranger to the place you had once called home, and while your lovers may try to help with that, you fear they may seem to be overcompensating a bit.

You woke up because of the ungodly amount of sound that came from the kitchen.

“Yunho?” Your eyes could barely focus on the things in front of you, besides, what the hell was he doing at home at this hour? Wiping the floor?

“Good morning, my love.” He sighed and got up, “I’m sorry did I wake you up? I dropped some pans and spilt milk. I’m sorry I’m a bit of a mess right now.” He kissed your forehead before going back to cooking, “I’m making breakfast, are pancakes, okay? We also have cereal, or I can make you some eggs or…”

“Pancakes are okay, but what are you doing here so late in the morning? Shouldn’t you be at the hospital?” You took a seat on the kitchen bar.

“I’m taking some time off, they asked me to. Just to get my head back on my shoulders.” He flipped a pancake, “Mingi will be back in a second he went to get some orange juice, we ran out yesterday and we know how much you like it and…” He kept on going, but you couldn’t make sense of what he was saying.

You looked at him without saying anything. His hands trembled with every move he made; he kept on rambling, not stopping to take a breath, afraid to let any uncomfortable silences come through. He couldn’t stay put, moving things around, not able to focus on one thing.

Mingi came through the door. His hands were full of grocery bags that threatened to snap and spill what was inside of them. “I’m back!” He set everything on the countertop, bags of snacks spilling out, hygiene products you were missing, and a bunch of things you don’t even remember mentioning you needed. “I bought everything you ask for, my love.”

“Mingi, you didn’t have to buy this all at once. I have most of this stuff back at my place.”

“Oh well, now you have them here.”

After everything that you had gone through you felt like you needed a bit of time alone, to take a step back and process. Having to come to terms with the idea of being single, actually trying to move on, Bang Chan, the club, Yunho and Mingi. All that in such a short period was messing with your head. But your lovers seemed to differ.

“Babe, I will come back earlier from work to take you on a date, okay?”

“Mingi, we went out yesterday, I’m sure Jongho needs your help back at the office.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of everything.”

Yunho wasn’t any different.

“My love, how about we go for a walk? Or would you rather watch a movie? We can go for some ice cream.”

“Yun, don’t you have to study? I saw your calendar and you have an upcoming test.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ll figure it out.”

You missed them, and not having them around had been a nightmare, but this might be over the top. Not neglecting you didn’t have to mean neglecting everything else. So, a list of all the things you had to do began to form in the back of your head.

First, figure out a way to tell them (in a way that won’t destroy Mingi) that you need some space to understand what’s going on in your head and heart. Second, get some actual work done; bills still need to get paid. Third and last of all (and the one you have been dreading the most) talk to Chan. You weren’t even sure if he would be willing to. Jisung said he hasn’t seen him come out of his apartment, and he doesn’t even answer the door; every single time Minho tried contacting him it goes straight to voice mail. Your friend assures you he only needs a bit of time, but you are not quite sure, this might be it for your friendship, and you won’t lie, it breaks your heart.

­____________________________________________

Going back to the first task. You rehearsed over and over again the things you want to say, in your head and front of the mirror, it makes you cringe, but it’s better than to see Mingi drown in tears and sobs.

“I appreciate all the effort you are putting in, but that doesn’t mean you have to neglect everything else in your life...”

“We have to learn how to balance work, our individuality and this relationship...”

“All this will take time, trust is gained slowly, and I’m sure…”

And you swore those would be the words that would come out of your mouth the second dinner was over. It wasn’t easy to explain how you ended up in this position…

Mingi between your legs, lapping at your pussy like a starved man, his mouth alternating between your entrance and your clit, not knowing which one to pleasure first. Meanwhile, Yunho was sucking at your neck, leaving bruises all over the sensitive skin; his fingers pinched and pulled on your nipples, and the sins that came out of his mouth made you tremble.

“Haven’t you missed this, my love?” He said pulling on your earlobe, “Have you missed Mingi eating your sweet, little cunt, mm?”

Mingi let your skin go with a pop, before pushing two of his long, thick fingers inside you without warning, finding a rhythm immediately, kitten licking your clit at the same time.

You couldn’t form any coherent thoughts; pleasure had completely taken over your brain; you could only feel the warmth of Mingi’s tongue and Yunho’s hard cock on your back.

“Please, please, please.” You didn’t even know what you were begging for.

“What do you need, baby? Tell us and we’ll give it to you.”

“I need you.” You whimpered.

“But baby, you have us.” Fucking Yunho, always a tease.

“Please, please Yuyu.”

“You need to tell me, love.”

Mingi’s mouth abandoned your core, leaving you aching and in need of more. “Come on, baby. You have to tell us what you want.” He urged, mocking you. “Use your words.” His fingers kept you on the edge, but not giving you any more.

Your mind is clouded by the overwhelming sensations coursing through your body. "I need..." you began, your voice barely above a whisper, "...both of you."

Yunho's fingers continued their torturous assault on your sensitive buds, while his teeth nipped your skin, "And you will have us."

Mingi resumed his ministrations with renewed fervour. His fingers delved deeper, stroking that sweet spot inside you that sent sparks of pleasure shooting through your veins, while his tongue resumed its teasing assault on your throbbing clit.

“I need to cum, please.”

"Then cum, my love, cum for us.”

With a strangled cry, you let yourself go, surrendering yourself to the overwhelming sea of sensations your lovers were providing. Heavy breaths escaped your chest, a constant ring in your ears, you could barely tell where you were, but one thing was clear, your lovers were not done with you.

You could feel them moving around you. This time Mingi was the one behind you, holding your knees against your chest, placing small kisses and whispering sweet nothings in your ear, his hands massaged your thighs gently.

“You did so good for us, sweetheart.” His fingers traced patterns in your bruised skin.

The familiar sound of the lubricant’s cap opening made you whimper; you had been conditioned to know what would happen next. Yunho and Mingi would always make sure to prepare you to take them, making you cum a couple of times before even trying anything, but tonight you just couldn’t wait, and neither could they.

“Are you ready, my love?” Yunho’s words made you tremble. You felt both their tips in your entrance, ready to claim you at the same time. Mingi kept his hands on your hips while the man in front of you caressed your legs, waiting for your permission to go on. Both of them slightly shaking with excitement and desperation.

“Yes.”

The sensation of being filled by them was overwhelming, but made you feel complete, whole, something you hadn’t felt in a long time. Their movements were slow and hesitant, not wanting to hurt you. Mingi’s moans and whines filled your ears, his hands pinched your skin and his head was thrown back in ecstasy.

“Oh my god, yes, god yes!” He wasn’t concerned by the sounds that left his mouth, too busy enjoying the feeling of your warmth enveloping him.

Yunho wasn’t doing any better, groans constantly leaving his mouth, driving himself deeper inch by inch. His eyebrows furrowed and mouth slightly opened, his eyes could only focus on the place where your bodies met and became one. The image of his and Mingi’s cock splitting you open wasn’t new, but goddamn was it the most erotic thing he had ever seen.

You closed your eyes, trying to control yourself. Pain and pleasure danced inside you, intertwining themselves and covering your entire being. Each thrust consumed you entirely, making your moans turn into screams, you could feel yourself teetering over the edge. The blonde´s fingers pushed on the small bud of nerves at your core making tears spill out of your eyes, while Yunho’s lips sucked your nipples raw.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.” He moaned, his hips never relenting their hellish pace. And a single moment of clarity, his eyes met Mingi’s. The same look of need and lust covered his face, red cheeks and dazed eyes, cries escaping his mouth, a small I love you between them. With what little sanity he had left, he took the younger man’s head and pushed their heads in a kiss. their teeth clashing and tongues sucking on each other in ardour, both of them moaning because of the new stimulation.

“I’m going to cum!” You cried. An explosion of pleasure filled your system, as your body convulsed in ecstasy, making you almost pass out. Yunho and Mingi couldn’t hold back any longer, the tight knot snapped, joining you and spilling their seed inside you. Their essence and yours running down your thighs, ending up in the couch’s leather.

The three of you lay breathless, boneless, but complete. You had for once and for all found your way back to each other, and after what felt like an eternity, everything felt right.

____________________________________________

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the 5 times you want mingi to stay + the 1 time he does

fuckbuddy!au

word count: 14k

angst, fluff, smut

funnily enough, the arrangement started on valentine’s day.

you and mingi both happened to be at a bar with your friends that night, your separate groups wallowing in self pity in the form of overpriced tequila and body-shots.

meanwhile the both of you sat just two stools away from each other, miserable not because of your relationship status but from the company that came with alcohol and obnoxious, drunken rambles.

those drunk ramblings were, in fact, what sparked everything.

Keep reading

THE 'U' IN 'US' - AN ATEEZ SERIES - CHAPTER ZERO

Summary: You weren't really the lonely girl™ of campus, but it does feel like it when you look around, and there's no one by your side when everyone else are talking and whispering between each other. You did have "friends", more like "group projet friends" that you managed to get for yourself, but they were the ones that were real close, you were there only when they had an extra empty seat. But it seems like the gods above took your nonchalant facade as a challenge. Oh, you don't think you need friends to survive through college? Bet.

Pairing: Non! idol OT8 ateez x reader (platonic)

Tags: college! au; hybrid! au; ateez! au; fluff (a whole lot of fluff and wholesomeness); angst; hurt/comfort; mentions of mistreatment and abuse.

WC: 2,2k

N/A: It's finally here!! Please reblog and let me know your thoughts, the feedback is really important to me 💕 If you want to be tagged, also let me know!

INTRO MASTERLIST ONE

Ateez Masterlist

Don’t you remember us?, the words repeating in your head as you stared back at the brown haired boy. Now that your attention was on him and him only, you noticed the smallest of ears picking up from his hair, the color blend made it almost invisible. He was not a human, he was a bear hybrid, and you remembered exactly where you met him for the first time.

The police station was a complete chaos that day. It was a sudden change from the monotony of the small town your father started working at the beginning of his career. There was at least double the people walking left and right. Doing what? You’d never know, but it seemed important enough that you’re too scared to interrupt any of them to ask where was the bathroom, much less your father. He was not in the best mood since you moved, and you hated to be the reason for more stress. Also, he busied himself in conversations you could only watch from a distance, not even keeping his eyes on you sat at an old chair.

He won’t even notice that I left…, how stupid of you.

You wandered off, walking next to the walls so no one would bump into you while carrying a stack of thick papers. There was no sign of a bathroom in the room you were, you didn’t even know where you were, no idea it was the heart of that police station.

You kept walking further and further out of the room into the empty hallways at the back, ignoring the signs at the top of each door, too focused on the triangle dress symbol you couldn’t find. You turned right, but you only found a single wooden door.

The sight was discouraging to say the least.

You sighed, or you thought you did, because you heard it, but it didn’t seem like it came out of your own mouth. Then you heard another sigh, now you were sure it wasn’t you.

You stared at the door a little longer, then up to the sign at the top of it, it said ‘RH waiting room’. You didn’t even know what RH was. A waiting room so far back? Maybe there is a bathroom inside of it. That was enough for you to grab the handle, but it wouldn’t open.

“You have to be kidding me”, you said as you looked up to the ceiling, but you hoped all the gods above could see your disappointment. You were out of luck for the 4th time this week.

Inside the room, there was only silence, something you didn’t notice right away. If you were there, you would be able to feel the tension and fear as the hybrid stared at the door.

“Hey, is there a bathroom in here?”, Jongho repeated the first words you said to him back to you. “You remember now, yeah?”, he could see the embarrassment coming back as you recalled what happened after that, which made him giggle with the others.

You never remembered that moment as funny, because your father told you what RH stood for and why anyone would be there in the first place. But he did.

“Wait, that’s actually the first thing you said to him?”, the one with the bunny ears asked, while laughing so hard he almost fell.

“Yes, I did Min…” you tried to recall as he leaned forward, a glee of expectation in his face as you said his name. “…gi, of course, Mingi”, you said as casually as you could.

He seemed so happy, you felt bad that it was whispered to you behind his back. You would get to it eventually, he did make a good impression of himself when you first saw him too.

“I do think I remember each one of you”, you said as you looked at each of them, one getting harder to greet than the other, until you reached the last two, Yunho and Hongjoong. They didn’t seem to hold any grudges against you, Yunho smiling wider than Hongjoong, but that was a given considering the little you knew about their personalities.

“It’s okay if you don’t, it’s been quite a while”, the blonde boy gestured it wasn’t a big deal with his hands. “I’m Yunho”.

“You didn’t have blonde hair back then…”, you trailed off as you remembered the one day you wished to forget.

“Nor the height, it’s truly unfair”, Wooyoung said with a sad tone as he gave the blonde one a side eye, but his fluffy red tail continued to bounce back and right with energy.

That comment made everyone giggle a little, even yourself. It was true, he grew up well that one, he seemed well nurtured too. That thought calmed your heart a bit.

“So can we sit, then?”, Mingi asked then sighed as if he was standing for hours by the table. Even his long bunny ears were tired of standing on top of his head, alert of all movement around him. He got one lightweight slap on the arm for that. “Ow… why-“, before he could whine, you interrupted.

“Of course, but there’s no-, Hongjoong, Yunho and San already went to get some extra chairs before you could finish the phrase, while the other 5 got comfortable in their sits.

Only then you noticed they wouldn’t be eating since there were no plates

“Do you guys want some?”, you asked as you looked down at your food.

They all declined, including the three ones that just came back with chairs, but you could see some of them eyeing your fries for a bit too long, so you slid the plate to the middle of the table.

“So, every single one of you came to study here, and this is a complete coincidence or this conversation has another purpose than to chitchat?”

In your mind, there was a clear answer. They wanted something from you, and you’ll be glad to give it to them if you could, but what can you do when the cases closed so many years ago?

“We saw you around campus”, Wooyoung said as he leaned over the table, you noticed one of his hands holding onto San’s arm, just like you remembered. “We didn’t think you would recognize us, though”, Hongjoong added after a beat of silence.

“So you followed me here? I don’t get it”, you looked at each one of them.

“No, w-”, Jongho said, but then looked at San and Yunho’s guilty smiles and back to you. “Kind of, some of us saw you around two other times, we weren’t sure it was you the first time, but your scent didn’t change much from back then…”, his voice losing its confidence and volume by the end of the phrase.

“We hoped you would be here, we did not see you today”, Seonghwa cut him off as he leaned forward. His smile was shy, but you could see it was sincere. “That’s the only time of the day we all have to be together before dinner, so don’t worry, we weren’t stalking you together like this”, he giggled while talking and then gestured to them all at the end of the phrase.

The effort Seonghwa had to make to not cover himself with his ears were more than he could express. He was glad his tail was out of sight, clinging to Hongjoong’s thighs in search of some comfort.

It was a weird feeling to be in front of you after so long, and Seonghwa knew the others would agree. He noticed how Yeosang was uncomfortable, readjusting his position on the chair every so often, and how San’s legs bounced without him even noticing.

“Well, that’s good to know”, it was easy for you to smile when they were being so adorable without even making an effort. “But that doesn’t really answer my question, so did you guys just wanted to talk?”

On one side, you had Mingi and Yeosang barely looking at you, at anyone for that matter. Then you had Hongjoong and San, apparently the air was so dry to the point they needed to wet their lips every 3 seconds. Seonghwa, Jongho and Yunho were too awkward to say it first, they could only smile to try to hide their own embarrassment. Wooyoung was eating to keep himself calm.

“Is it that bad?”, your joke made Yunho and Seonghwa giggle and shook their heads. “Then you can tell me, it’s okay, did I make that big of an impression in some of you when we met?”, it was supposed to be a joke, they were supposed to laugh.

But all of them nodded. In such a serious way, too, they weren’t awkward smiling anymore. Their staring suddenly became intense. You couldn’t pretend they didn’t mean it, and you didn’t know what to do with that information.

What could you say? You didn’t do anything to help them, you couldn’t do anything at that age and with the little independence you had. Not to them, nor any other hybrid who stepped foot into that police station.

Your silence spoke for you, and your surprise spoke more than you intended to.

“We just wanted to see how you were doing and to show you how we were doing”, Hongjoong broke the silence.

“I’m glad you all are doing well”, they recognize a certain softness as you said those words, they knew you meant it from your heart.

It was this softness you carried with you whenever you spoke to them that made such a big impression. Humans tend to be harsher while talking to hybrids, maybe because they couldn’t see themselves in their position to be kinder or because they thought hybrids were born stronger and less emotional, they wouldn’t care about those things, right? Up until they met themselves, the only kind one was you, even when it was so brief they barely met your eyes.

“You weren’t even scared”, you barely heard Yeosang’s voice, but the other boys heard him as clear as the day.

He seemed like he was in another world, since he wasn’t looking to anyone in particular. Yeosang jumped out his skin when Seonghwa nudged him on his ribcage. The red colored his cheeks, ears, and nape as Wooyoung did a poor job at hiding his laughter.

You did laugh yourself, but you cleared your throat. “Who wasn’t even scared?

“Hmm, you, you didn’t seem scared when we came by”, Yeosang said as he searched for something to look at to calm himself down, but you did deserve the respect of being look at while being spoken to, so he ignored his instincts and all the bullshit he learned to look at you.

“Why would I be scared of you?”, you said as you watched all of them.

That didn’t even cross your brain, you only realized now. You were too busy wondering why someone would break the ultimate rule of society ‘do no talk to someone wearing headphones’, because that would be much more rare than a hybrid attack out of nowhere. Okay, that wasn’t a real statistic, but it could be.

Yeosang thought you were talking about him for a moment, but then he noticed it wasn’t the case. It was clear no one would ever be scared of Yeosang or Seonghwa, they were at the bottom of the hierarchy, even Wooyoung wouldn’t scare many hybrids, much less many humans. The other 5 were a different matter. By their tails only, one would know they were predators hybrids. Jongho could be underestimated, but smart eyes could tell he was a bear hybrid and not to be messed with.

They were surprised by your genuine question, including Hongjoong, but he felt like he shouldn’t be. You seemed to be just like the kid he met.

“Most people would, but you don’t seem like you are capable of being scared of hybrids, do you?”, Hongjoong said as he observed your body language.

His words carried more meaning than he let it show to the others, but you got it, of course, you did. You also remembered.

“Guess my mom was right when she said I’m not like everyone else then”.

“Fuck, I missed you”, those were the first words San said to you and it caught everyone off guard.

It sounded so genuine and raw, San himself didn’t know what to do now that he said it. Until now, he was observing, checking in with all of the others body languages and emotions, Wooyoung’s more than the others only because he was right beside him. But his own emotions were boiling inside of him, he had to say something to you, but he couldn’t find the right words, well, until now.

Wooyoung was only surprised by the sudden emotion coming from San, but he couldn’t say he was surprised he felt that way in the first place. You must not know to this day what truly happened to them when they met you, but your kindness was the only thing they had to hold themselves onto and if it was up to him, you would never know.

“I’m- I-“, Choi San was blushing like a school girl and that was enough for all chaos break loose.

The other students couldn’t help, but get curious to know what the hell was so funny as laughter dominated the whole cafeteria and to know who were those hybrids that no one saw before.

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