Moonstruck - Tumblr Posts

"Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice - it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and die. The storybooks are bullshit. Now I want you to come upstairs with me and get in my bed!"

Nicholas Cage as Ronny Cammareri in Moonstruck

My Man Wants Me Because I Have His Rib

The following is from the movie Moonstruck. This conversation is another reason why I love this movie entirely too much.

Rose: Why do men chase women?

Johnny: Well, there’s a Bible story… God… God took a rib from Adam and made Eve. Now maybe men chase women to get the rib back. When God took the rib, he left a big hole there, where there used to be something. And the women have that. Now maybe, just maybe, a man isn’t complete as a man without a woman.

— part one

SYNOPSIS ;

─ in which river henshaw,

     charleston's very own

     introverted and innocent

      baker by night slash daycare worker

      by day, runs away from jungkook

     jeon and his adorable

    daughter, moon, when all jungkook

     wants is to ask her out on a date.

ACTS ;

act one ; incomplete

act two ; incomplete

act three ; incomplete

WARNINGS ;

mutual pining

he falls first

body insecurities mentioned

eating disorder mentioned

social anxiety

mature themes

mature language

violence ( not directed at MFC )

slight bdsm themes ( like bondage and shit )

angst ( should I make y'all suffer more in this one?)

when it's time for the smuttttt, i'll put warnings.

EXTRA INFO ;

jeon jungkook x river aldora henshaw

brett west x blackbourne team

sang sorenson x toma team

kayli winchester x blake coaltar

atlas korba x wil winchester

started ; January 1st, 2023

plot change ; January 17th,  2023

posted ( on Wattpad ) ; January 18th, 2023 at 2:50 pm

completed ;

edited/revised ;

SMALL A/N ;

also, my characters, Atlas Korba and Brett West ( from my book, Brett ) will have appearances!

I'M FREAKIN' SHAKING IN EXCITEMENT FOR THIS!

DISCLAIMER ;

2024 © @LivelyPotter

All Rights Reserved

You may not reproduce,

distribute/and or adapt

any part of this work

without my permission

I only own my original characters and the plot.

PLAYLIST ;

Morally Grey ; April Jai

Fictional ; Khloe Rose

Suffer ; Sarah Jeffery

Cruel Summer ; Taylor Swift

Greedy ; Tate McRae

Haegeum ; Agust D

Like Crazy ; Jimin

Take Two ; BTS

Love me again ; V

Still with you ; Jungkook

My Time ; Jungkook

Somebody ; Jungkook

Standing Next To You ; Jungkook

She's all I wanna be ; Tate McRae

My You ; Jungkook

Butterfly ; BTS

Dimple ; BTS

3D ; Jungkook

Exes ; Tate McRae

Hurt my Feelings ; Tate McRae

Run for the Hills ; Tate McRae

Sweet but Psycho ; Ava Max

Dangerously ; Charlie Puth

Spring Day ; BTS

Bloodline ; Ariana Grande

Want that Too ; Tate McRae

Shot Glass Full of Tears ; Jungkook

Closer to you ; Jungkook

Yes or No ; Jungkook

Please don't Change ; Jungkook

NOTE ;

Hi, everyone!

I'm so excited to be able to start writing the first chapter and I hope that you look forward to it! Be sure to add this book to your reading list or reblog to know when I update!

MOST IMPORTANT NOTE ; ( to those not familiar with the academy series by C.L. Stone )

I know I'm gaining more readers, those who aren't familiar with the academy, so I'll do a short explanation of what you'll be seeing from the academy!

In short, the academy series is a reverse harem/polyamory series set in Charleston, South Carolina.

( so you'll be seeing multiple men date the same women in this book, so don't be shocked lmfaoo )

The academy ( that MFC won't be much involved in ) is basically a top secret organization that specializes in helping men, women, and children who are in an abusive relationship or homes and help them get out of that — most join the academy to help others in the same situations.

There are teams that work together and are basically a family in all but blood; and "family is a choice".

The men in teams are referred to as "dogs" and the female team members are referred to as "birds". 'Ghosts', whether birds or dogs, are children without much history to their names. They are priceless to the Academy.

The Academy's system works on a series of favor and financial debt. Everyone in the Academy starts out with financial debt. It's the value of the education an Academy student requires to become the best at what he does. If it was a private investigation training class or an eight-week boot camp, or you were starving and needed groceries to get through a human biology class, the Academy took care of it. Your debt can't just be paid off directly, it requires completing various Academy missions. Whatever it is, there is a price tag.

Favors though are the real core of the Academy. Favors are anything that doesn't have a price - usually family problems within the Academy that other members can't handle alone. New members owe ten favors immediately, with the maximum owed being thirty. The value of a task in favors varies depending on the task.

All Academy trials are comprised of the same parties: the whole team, plus five randomly selected members from other teams, presided over by a manager who has collected all the data. There is no age minimum for the randomly selected members, the only requirement is that they had to be past initiation and a full member of the Academy. The ultimate goal at a trial is to keep the family together as much as possible.

Each team has two leads. The first is the main contact for the Academy, they track the jobs the members go on, and let them know what jobs are available. The second is the family lead, who keeps track of all the team members, and makes sure that everything runs smoothly for them - ensuring they have food, bills are paid on time, and everyone that needs a job has one.

Most of this information is from the academy wiki site ( 'cause it's fuckin' complicated to explain it all )

but I want you all to be able to understand it enough to enjoy the story without being confused!

Most of the time, I'll explain through River and my other characters.

I hope this makes sense!

River won't be very involved in the academy, but there will be mentions and most of River's story revolves around, not only Jungkook and Moon, but River's brothers, friends, and family!

Please let me know if there is anything that you'll misunderstand and I'll explain to the best of my ability!

- LivelyPotter

— moon struck ; jjk ; one

— genre ; strangers to friends to lovers/kinda grumpy x sunshine/smut/fluff/angstwithahappyending 🥹

— warnings ; body insecurities ( mentioned ), eating disorder ( in the past but mentioned ), oc deals with a severe amount of anxiety and panic attacks, violence, smut ( later ), FLUFF, love struck jungkookie 🥹

— find me on Wattpad ; @/LivelyPotter

— word count ; 2.4k

— part two

— 2024 © @LivelyPotter

river’s pov ; six am

My brother Brandon always used to tell me to make sure the walls that I built to protect myself didn't become a prison — a prison that I couldn't escape.

Ten years later, I could shamefully say that I did not listen to his advice, and now I was paying for it in the worst way possible.

Knees tucked to my chest, I panted and eyed the area around me nervously, as if I expected the man that I had been avoiding as the plague had come upon me.

Tucked inside the teeny tiny cleaning closet across from the kitchen, with the door locked and closed – it wasn't possible, but in my mind, there was still a chance.

But maybe that was just me being paranoid.

Okay, I was paranoid. Very paranoid.

Listening closely to the parents dropping their children off, I prayed to whoever was listening to me at this moment that I wouldn't be found by anyone until it was only Sang, the children, and I in the building.

I gulped past the ball that seemed to be lodged in my throat constantly whenever he came to my mind.

He nearly always was on my mind, so I was growing quite used to the clogging of my throat and the constant upbeat of my heart thrumming inside my chest.

He was here, and he crept up on me ( not really, I'm just being dramatic ) without my notice with little Moon in his big strong arms.

Once I caught sight of him – smiling kindly and brightly as he always did, a breathless whisper of my name leaving his red-bitten lips – I squeaked and ran away like a coward, ghostly pale face stained crimson.

It had been this way for seven, grueling, nerve-racking, months.

Ever since Jeon Jungkook moved to Charleston with his two-year-old daughter to live closer to his aunt, Mi Cha, my life had turned on its axis. I was living in fear every morning when the twenty-six-year-old man would drop off his daughter at the daycare center Sang and I ran.

A whimper of disparity left my lips.

My other best friends Brett and Atlas would never let me live this down. On the other hand, Sang and Wil wouldn't give me a hard time about running away from the man when he hadn't even spoken ten words to me.

Not for lack of trying, he had tried speaking to me — every day in fact, but I was the problem. I was the one who chickened out the moment I saw his intimidating, tattoo-laden figure — looking totally out of place in the yellow and lavender mellow aura surrounding the daycare center.

I didn't want to admit to the rest of my friends and family that I was scared of him. Terrified is a better word for it.

I gnawed on my bottom lip, enough to taste the nasty metallic taste of blood coating my tongue.

I cringed and rubbed over the small gash on my lower lip.

I know. I know it's unrealistic and okay, childish to be afraid of a man that I didn't know...but I just couldn't help it! I just couldn't!

Not when he stares at me, with those pretty boba-like eyes and that sweet smile on his handsome face, which for some odd reason, I find him doing a lot before my slow brain finally clicks that he's near.

When I catch sight of him, my fight-or-fly instinct kicks in and I'm gone.

It leads me to some very embarrassing moments that I'm not proud of.

Heck, even last week at the supermarket, I found him and Moon shopping and before he could find me, I hightailed it to the freezer section, and thankfully old man Joe — the resident frozen food stocker, let me hide in the freezing ice room containing huge pieces of pork, beef, and chicken hanging from metal hooks.

I could imagine Brett and Atlas laughing at my misfortune. Those two were a lot more courageous than I was, and I was still fighting past my insecurities about how in the world those two amazing people would want to be friends with me.

A girl who had way too many issues and experienced large bouts of cowardice.

Oh for dingleberries sake!

A shiver tumbled down my spine as I once again remembered that freezer room.

It freaked me out since it reminded me of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but I held strong. Being forced to be scared of ole Joe plunging one of those metal hooks through my neck and suspending my dead body from the ceiling was better than being around Jungkook and those feelings I got whenever I was around him.

Yes, I was running away from my feelings, and I didn't care.

As long as it wasn't hurting anyone, I could carry on in life with a guiltless conscience.

I wasn't hurting anyone, right?

A tremble parted my lips as a quick knock sounded on the door.

"River, he's gone now." A resounding sigh of relief left my lips at hearing Sang's voice. "Moon's been crying for you for the past ten minutes."

I licked at my chapped lips and got up off the floor, and dusted off my light denim baggy pants, and tugged at the oversized Nike sweatshirt I wore as I opened the door and skittered out.

Sang, with her arms crossed across her pink dress-covered figure, watched me sympathetically and carefully wrapped her taller self around my pixie-like frame and led me down the hall and into the children's room.

"You know you'll eventually have to stop avoiding him, right?" She chuckled and pinched my rosy cheek between her manicured fingers.

I avoided her eyes and fiddled with the hem of my shirt, "You don't see his face every time you run, Rivvy." She sighed, "I feel bad for the poor man, Mi Cha speaks about it sometimes. You ought to give Jungkook a break."

Why did it matter to him whether I avoided him or not?

Wouldn't a lot of people be put off by the sheer dominance that man gave off?

Wasn't he used to it?

I cringed, "...I'm sorry. I just can't help it." I mumbled and tucked my pale hair behind my ears as a high-pitched scream entered my ears.

Wincing at the familiar sound, a smile quirked up my lips at the tiny baby, with her gleaming, tear-filled boba eyes and wobbly lips, and cute little curled pigtails swinging back and forth as she marched towards me.

Her little white Air Force ones thumped on the ground as the tiny little girl marched towards me clumsily.

I mustered a giggle and knelt to receive the adorable two-year-old in my arms.

This, ladies and gentlemen, was Jeon Moon.

"Riv!" She cried out a new version of my name, the only part she could pronounce, and fat tears dribbled down her face as she placed her head on my chest.

"Shhh," I hushed the little child, who had begun to get the other kids' attention and before the others swarmed me, demanding attention, I had to quiet her. "It's okay, Moon." I smoothed back her silky dark hair as she calmed down and sniffled against my sweatshirt.

Sang smirked and pushed her chameleon-colored hair off her shoulders, "I don't know why she always comes to you, River." She snickered, now holding little Sarah in her arms.

"But seeing as you both prefer to keep to yourselves and avoid other people like the plague, I kinda see it." She joked.

"Haha." I deadpan at her, blinking down at Moon. My heart swelled at the adorable child and I hugged her closer to my body.

She was just too darn cute!

I wouldn't admit it out loud, but she looked like a baby female version of her dad.

Over the next few minutes, Sang and I sat on the floor as we watched over the kids who had already raided the toy box.

Being the youngest and the most interesting yet introverted child I had ever met, Moon decided to stay seated on my lap while digging into the soft strawberry puff snacks her dad packed for her.

"Oh!" Sang spoke up suddenly, causing Moon and I to look at her, lips forming an O at being startled.

My best friend stifled a giggle, "Your brothers will be here soon — they decided to bring lunch for us since you forgot to bring your own." She sent me a knowing look, more than likely knowing that I had forgotten on purpose.

I once again avoided her eyes and turned my focus to Moon who cooed, those rosy sun-kissed cheeks chubbily pooched out as she ate.

I released a laugh of my own and wiped along her lips with a baby wipe, cleaning the crumbs from her little delicate face.

"Sounds good." I exclaimed, meeting her emerald eyes, "Brett messaged me this morning and said she and Atlas may come down soon to hang out."

Sang only nodded and looked behind my shoulder, biting her lol nervously.

I felt my stomach drop and dread fill my gut. "What is it?" I gulped, fearing the worst.

Sang chewed on her top lip thoughtfully, "I was wondering whether or not you could take over pickup later today, Brandon and Corey need me back at this apartment."

The nervous tinge in her voice caused suspicion to curl along inside my chest, but knowing I would have to face my biggest nightmare, I nodded.

"Sure," I replied, my normally soft-spoken voice shaking in trepidation. I would find a way out of having to face him. I risked a look down at Moon who began to toy with my earring.

Sang had a proud glint in her eye, "Thank you, Rivvy!"

"No problem." I forced a smile and played with Moon's little pigtails.

Sang walked off to help stop a dispute between a couple of ten-year-olds while I gazed down at Moon.

"Oh, Moon." A loud sigh left my lips, displaying the fear inside my heart. "Why does your daddy have to be so darn scary?"

***

third pov ; jeon jungkook

The twenty-six-year-old man stared glumly at the table before him in silence. Using a spoon, Jungkook stirred the warmed ginseng tea within the mug.

"Did that sweet River flee from you again, joka?" Jeon Mi Cha guessed, studying the expression on her nephew's face.

Jungkook fiddled with the silver bar through his brow and sighed heavily, his expression and bodily actions speaking for themselves.

He sipped slowly at the warm drink and licked the droplets from his pierced bottom lip.

"Of course." He exhaled, gritting his teeth. "It's been like this for months, gomo. Why should I expect anything else? I...I try to speak to her every day, and it just stings when she doesn't even give me a chance to speak to her."

Jungkook felt his heart squeeze within the confines of his rib cage and resisted the urge to rub the skin above his heart.

Mi Cha frowned, "I've known that girl since she was five years old and clinging onto her brother's pant leg." She chuckled, seeing a smile erupt on Jungkook's face as he imagined a tiny five-year-old River.

Fuck, he imagined she was as adorable as his Moon!

"She hasn't got out much, Jungkookie." Mi Cha smiled comfortingly, "From what Sang has told me, the girl was homeschooled by her brothers and never really left her home. The only people that are close enough to her are family and those friends of hers that she's known her entire life."

"I know," Jungkook rubbed across his sharp jawline and tongued his cheek thoughtfully, "Since Min Jee and I divorced...I hadn't ever really tried to get back into the dating scene — honestly, I never really felt the urge to, until I saw her." He rumbled, eyes crinkled at the corners as his cheeks flushed the slightest bit.

He'd never blush because of a girl before, but since he had met River Henshaw, blushing in her presence was all he could do.

He wished he could play it cool.

Mi Cha hid her knowing smile behind her hand and continued to listen to Jungkook ramble.

"It's unbelievable to explain this out loud...but I want to get to know her so badly...it's like...she's like..." he struggled to find the right words so his aunt came to understand him. "I just know that she's something special. I just know it. We've never had a conversation, but I know I'll fall for her the second she looks into my eyes and smiles at me."

She was perfect in his eyes.

Attracted to her from first sight, and later falling in deeper the more he learned about her from Sang, Mi Cha, and hell, even his little Moon, who worshiped the ground River Henshaw walked on just proved time and time again that he shouldn't give up.

He didn't think he could.

No matter how insecure he got...when all she did was blatantly avoid him and tremble when he got near.

It was a searing blow to his self-confidence.

When she looked at him for the first time, it was like bells rang in his ears and everything around them blurred and all he could see was her.

"You'll get your chance, joka. It will take time. She's a skittish one."

Jungkook nodded, but other thoughts overwhelmed him.

"It just makes me upset when I hear her mutter 'run, River, run!' to herself." Jungkook's face fell in sadness.

What if the reason she wanted nothing to do with him was because he was older than her? Not too much — only seven years — or was it the fact that he was a dad?

The woman his mother had tried and failed to set him up with a year ago was always put off by the fact that he had a daughter. A baby.

Pushing those thoughts to the back of his brain, Jungkook looked back to Mi Cha and rose that pierced brow of his.

"Because you're here at seven am on a Monday morning and not at your shop." She snorted, "Plus you have that puppy love look in your eyes. Again."

Jungkook only grunted in return, resuming his task of avoiding her knowing eyes to count to specks on the marble counter.

author's note ;  ✨

Thank you all so much for reading and I hope you loved the introduction to River's story!

Don't hesitate to let me know what you think!



˚ ༘♡ ·˚꒰ᥕᥱᥣᥴ᥆꧑ᥱ ₊˚ˑ

— moon struck ; jjk - intro - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 -

— nepenthe ; jjk - intro - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9

— trials of athena ; jjk - intro - teaser - 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5

— limitless ; jjk ( completed on WP, coming soon )

— grey ; OT7 ( coming soon )

— masochist ; jjk ( coming soon )

— beg ; jjk ( coming soon )

— penpal ; jjk ( coming soon )

— his submissive; jjk ( coming soon )

note ; most of my works are on wattpad, so if you wanna read ahead, feel free to go onto my wattpad to start reading!

Wattpad

Academy Info for my fics ( please read )

As always, I thank you all so much for reading my works and I’m so grateful ✨💜

— moon struck ; jjk ; two

— moon struck ; jjk

— genre ; strangers to friends to lovers/kinda grumpy x sunshine/smut/fluff/angstwithahappyending 🥹

— warnings ; body insecurities ( mentioned ), eating disorder ( in the past but mentioned ), oc deals with a severe amount of anxiety and panic attacks, violence, smut ( later ), FLUFF, love struck jungkookie 🥹

— find me on Wattpad ; @/LivelyPotter

— word count ; 1.4k

— part one

— my masterlist

— 2024 © @LivelyPotter

river's pov; five pm "Bye, Sarah! Bye, Mrs. Goode! See you tomorrow!" I waved, voice a higher pitch due to nervousness.

Moon gurgled happily within my arms as I clutched onto her for comfort, my cheek falling onto her little head as Mrs. Goode and her daughter waved goodbye with matching wide smiles.

Shivers tumbled down my spine when it was only Moon and I inside the room.

I had hoped that by this time the rest of the parents would arrive after Jungkook did. But, as always, Jungkook would be here in time. At exactly five o'clock.

Oddly enough, the rest of the kids' guardians came early to pick them up due to a football game at Ashley Waters High.

It was at this moment I realized that today, the good lord was most definitely not on my side.

With a resigned sigh, I closed the entrance door and walked back towards the playroom to gather Moon's things and pack them back into her diaper bag her dad packed and left with her the days she was here.

Setting Moon to play on the soft carpet with some soft toys, I folded her stained clothes which she had dirtied when playing with her food earlier, wrapped them up in a paper bag, and slid them into the sleek black backpack that had the moon phases on the front below the zipper.

"Gah!" The shrill that left Moon's lips had me jumping when she threw a white fluffy bunny off her lap to grasp the purple one.

I giggled to myself and crawled towards her to hand her the bunny. "Here, little Moon."

She sent a gummy smile up at me before her mind and attention were taken over by the toys in front of her.

Seeing she was now taken care of, I hummed to myself, putting her other toys and snacks inside the bag before zipping it shut.

My shoulders slumped in relief once all of Moon's items were in her bag. I always felt awkward and hesitant to go through another person's bag — permission given or not. It was still awkward for me.

I dusted off my pants and pulled my long hair back into a high ponytail, feeling tiredness creep into my joints. Babysitting energetic kids while surviving on five hours of sleep would exhaust a girl.

Stifling a yawn, I laid on my tummy in front of Moon's little feet and played with her toys for her as she laughed — clapping her teeny hands together.

"A-gan!" She demanded, cutely outstretching the purple bunny.

"Okay," I giggled, feet kicking back and forth in the air. Time passed as I pretended to make the bunnies dance.

I was so involved in making Moon happy that I failed to realize a looming dark shadow swallowing my frame — watching intensely.

That was until Moon looked over my shoulder and screamed shrilly — little tears of joy already pricking her wide doe eyes.

"You girls having fun?" I felt my heart drop out of my bottom at the sound of Jungkook's husky, orotund voice.

I felt that familiar ball lodge itself in my throat as Moon whimpered happily and scrambled up, the little ruffles of her little pink dress shifting around her tiny knees.

"Da! Da!" She shrieked happily, and waddled past my tensed, frozen limbs to cling onto Jungkook's pants.

I forced back a whimper of my own, this one of fear, and slowly turned my eyes to stare at his black Balenciaga combat boots.

Moon tugged at his dark jeans and pouted, sniffles coming from her throat, "Up! Da, Up!" She demanded in her cute voice, wanting to be picked up and cuddled.

I felt his stare pierce through me, and I shivered and shied away. It was like I was naked — and he could see entirely through me.

I didn't like that.

It was an odd, uncomfortable feeling. And I did not like odd and uncomfortable things.

Jungkook's hands came down and grasped Moon's little waist and hoisted her up to cuddle against his robust, toned chest.

I avoided looking in his direction as he mumbled sweetly to Moon — greeting her happily after being away from her the whole day.

I scurried over towards the cubbies and withdrew Moon's diaper bag — knowing he was looking at me.

Panic bubbled up inside me as he drew closer, tugging at the white tank top and white button-down shirt he wore overtop.

I quickly took a glance down at his black studded belt and felt my breath catch.

In the blink of an eye, he was standing right in front of me, Moon happily and quietly resting in his huge tattooed arms.

Keep calm, River. Please don't make a fool of yourself.

For dingleberries sake!

"Thank you for watching over her for me," he spoke softly as if he was afraid to say the wrong thing. "She always has fun here." He chuckled, eliciting a gurgled laugh to leave Moon. 

It only made my head sink lower.

He made me feel like a child again. Small, weak, and so submissive.

"No problem!" I squealed dumbly, fumbling with my arms as I wrapped them around myself and met his eyes shyly.

"I...I love spending time with her." I admitted in a low whisper, feeling a tiny ounce of proudness rushing through my veins.

His boba-like eyes gleamed happily when they met mine and his breath seemed to catch in his throat as he willed the eye contact to continue. 

The soles of his boots squeaked on the linoleum floor as he shifted his feet. 

The sound made my eyes fall to the floor and I jerkily held out the handle of Moon's bag.

I opened my mouth, but no words would leave me. My limbs seemed frozen, and I couldn't move.

His stare stuck me in place and didn't allow movement.

"Thanks," he rumbled and reached forward to grab the bag.

His huge warm tattooed hand brushed against my tiny one, making me gasp and jump back from the contact of his skin sizzling against mine.

My heart rate amped up and raced inside my chest.

Dingleberries! What was that?

I peeked up in time to see Jungkook's jaw rock back and forth as he opened his mouth, before snapping it shut. He licked at the silver hoops through his bottom lip, naturally drawing my eyes to his lips.

I blushed at the otherworldly handsome man in front of me and inched back.

He was scary, but dingleberries — he looked so perfect. Like he jumped out of my fantasies.

"...I better get going." Jungkook broke the silence and stared down at my frame which he dwarfed with his huge muscular build.

Moon had already fallen asleep during our awkward, yet intense encounter.

"Yeah," I whispered back, wrapping my arms around my stomach.

Jungkook let out a grin.

His boba doe eyes watched me and observed my figure before he stepped away and slowly left the room, not forgetting to look over his shoulder every few seconds to make sure I was there.

Where else could I go?

I was still frozen, rooted, and unable to move until he was well away from the daycare center.

***

third pov ; jeon jungkook ; six thirty pm

Jungkook couldn't help the boyish smile that was on his face as he and Moon watched yet another episode of Paw Petrol before Moon's bedtime.

All that was on his mind, at this moment, was River.

She had spoken to him!

She looked like she could have fainted before him, but he talked to her!

Jungkook felt his toes curl in excitement at the future possibilities. He knew she was intimidated by him, most people were, but he hoped in time, that she would look past his domineering aura — apart from the bedroom, that is — until he could show her that he was nothing to be afraid of.

His aunt and mother always told him that he was just a big ass teddy bear on the inside.

His hand tingles at the memory of him purposely brushing his skin against her little tiny hand — and fuck, her skin was so silky soft.

Jungkook nearly growled at the remembrance of her jasmine and laven scent wafting off her little womanly body.

Moon tugged at his shirt, dragging him from his thoughts to show him her favorite part of her show.

"I see, baby." He assured her beautifully adorable daughter, placing a kiss on her little head as she splayed out on his chest.

As he rocked Moon to sleep, Jungkook could only wonder what tomorrow would bring.

Would he finally get to talk to her again?

Or was it just a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity? author's note ; ✨ I hope you enjoyed the chapter! I love jungkook, river, and moon sm 💜✨

— this is for the readers who aren’t familiar with the academy! Most of my BTS ff’s are academy crossover but you only need to a few key things. Down below, I’m giving you a little bit of a rundown. You may not need to know everything to understand my books; but I feel better having this up for you all the read. I’ll be putting this post in my masterlist so you all go back to it anytime you need to.

— academy info ;

I know I'm gaining more readers, those who aren't familiar with the academy, so I'll do a short explanation of what you'll be seeing from the academy!

In short, the academy series is a reverse harem/polyamory series set in Charleston, South Carolina.

( so you'll be seeing multiple men date the same women in this book, so don't be shocked lmfaoo )

The academy ( that MFC won't be much involved in ) is basically a top secret organization that specializes in helping men, women, and children who are in an abusive relationship or homes and help them get out of that — most join the academy to help others in the same situations.

There are teams that work together and are basically a family in all but blood; and "family is a choice".

The men in teams are referred to as "dogs" and the female team members are referred to as "birds". 'Ghosts', whether birds or dogs, are children without much history to their names. They are priceless to the Academy.

The Academy's system works on a series of favor and financial debt. Everyone in the Academy starts out with financial debt. It's the value of the education an Academy student requires to become the best at what he does. If it was a private investigation training class or an eight-week boot camp, or you were starving and needed groceries to get through a human biology class, the Academy took care of it. Your debt can't just be paid off directly, it requires completing various Academy missions. Whatever it is, there is a price tag.

Favors though are the real core of the Academy. Favors are anything that doesn't have a price - usually family problems within the Academy that other members can't handle alone. New members owe ten favors immediately, with the maximum owed being thirty. The value of a task in favors varies depending on the task.

All Academy trials are comprised of the same parties: the whole team, plus five randomly selected members from other teams, presided over by a manager who has collected all the data. There is no age minimum for the randomly selected members, the only requirement is that they had to be past initiation and a full member of the Academy. The ultimate goal at a trial is to keep the family together as much as possible.

Each team has two leads. The first is the main contact for the Academy, they track the jobs the members go on, and let them know what jobs are available. The second is the family lead, who keeps track of all the team members, and makes sure that everything runs smoothly for them - ensuring they have food, bills are paid on time, and everyone that needs a job has one.

Most of this information is from the academy wiki site ( 'cause it's fuckin' complicated to explain it all )

Note that some of my works are in the academy universe, but won’t have much to do with it ( like limitless, moon struck, nepenthe, masochist, grey, trials of Athena, etc. )

Thank you all for reading ❤️✨

— should I start a taglist?? If so, who wants to be on it??

— moon struck ; part 5

— genre ; strangers to friends to lovers, kinda grumpy x sunshine, fluff, angst, smut, angst with a happy ending 🥹

— warnings ; body insecurities ( mentioned ), eating disorder ( mentioned ), oc deals with a severe amount of anxiety and panic attacks, violence, smut ( later ), FLUFF, love struck jungkookie 🥹

— find me on Wattpad ; LivelyPotter

— word count ; 1.5k

— intro , part one, part two, part three, part four

— 2024 © LivelyPotter all rights reserved

— taglist ; @ahgasegotarmy116 @jk97bam

river's pov ; two days later ; six am

Sullenly staring at Jungkook's unread text messages on my phone, guilt bubbled within my veins.

Two days ago, when we exchanged numbers, I had only replied once.

And that was all.

I was too nervous to even text him.

And I felt bad for ignoring him when he didn't do anything wrong – and I was sure to get yet another lecture for my behavior once Corey found out.

It was only a matter of time before Jungkook would come and drop off Moon before he went to work...and I didn't know what to do.

Sighing lowly, I hesitantly opened his message – one he had sent yesterday and gulped.

jungkook: how r u?

Something inside me fluttered at his words, but I pushed those feelings to the back of my mind, to a place I would more than likely never visit unless I was in the middle of a midnight mental breakdown.

I didn't like to allow myself to feel much.

Not even back when I was a young teenager.

I had never experienced love...or romantic feelings towards anyone.

Sure, I loved my family and my friends but romantic feelings...yeah no.

I was better off alone, or so I told myself.

My thumbs tapped lightly on the screen of my cell phone as I sat, cross legged, on the floor beside Sang and a couple of seven-year-olds. I sent a smile to the happy kids and handed them the baby dolls they asked for.

me: I'm great. How are you?

I bit down on my lip, debating whether or not my text was too unfeeling. I rolled my eyes at my conscience and typed out another message.

me: also, I'm sorry for the late reply. I was up late last night finishing up another order for later today and my phone died. I hope you and Moon have been well.

There.

Now my stupid guilty conscience can take a rest.

"You okay, Rivvy?"

I snapped out of my of daze and stashed my phone in my pocket.

Out of the corner of my eye, I watched the familiar matte black Audi R8 park in front of the daycare center and paled.

"Uh, yeah..." I muttered under my breath, feeling the air expelled from my lungs at the sight of Jungkook, dressed in a pair of black pants with red lining down the legs with a matching top.

As always, his hair was effortlessly styled and another pair of black chunky combat boots accentuated his figure and fashion.

I distantly wondered how many pairs of combat boots the man owned and wondered if I could ever pick up the nerve to ask him where he got them so I could get a pair for myself.

I was embarrassed to say that Jungkook and Moon had better style than me.

I preferred to wear clothing that hid my figure...so I wouldn't feel people staring at me all the time.

Before I knew it, I was on my feet and hurrying away when Jungkook opened the back door and disappeared inside the car.

"I'm just... going to...check on the cupcakes! Yeah, that's it!" I snapped my fingers, ignoring Sang's blank stare on my back.

In the background, across the room, Brett's roaring laughter was heard.

"You can only hide for so long, Rivvy!" Brett called after my scampering figure. I waved her off and skidded inside the kitchen. My phone buzzed in my pocket, but I quickly shook off the trepidation of opening the text message that came through.

I know, Brett—no need to remind me.

I groaned and tugged the sleeves of my oversized sweatshirt over my hands and ducked down. You freaking coward.

I gnawed nervously on my lip when the door opened and Moon's excited squeals entered the room. The nervous lip-biting washed away at her happy squeals and my heart quickened in happiness.

Awww.

"Hey, sweet little Moon!" I heard Sang coo in the other room, "I've missed seeing your adorable little face."

Moon gurgled happily, another happy screech leaving her little body. "Riv! Riv! Riv!" her cute little voice chirped over and over. I could barely contain the awed noise that left my lips after she called out to me.

All I wanted to do was leave my hiding spot and cuddle the little cute baby.

My lips thinned nervously at Jungkook's rumbling chuckle. "You'll see her soon, baby. Okay?"

"Awwww! Lemme hold you, little Moon!" Brett exclaimed happily, more than likely already trying to hold Moon.

A cute angry cry left Moon.

"No!" Moon's favorite word other than 'Da' left her, "Wan' Riv! Da! Wan' Riv!"

A victorious snicker left my lips at Moon's blatant refusal of Brett holding her echoed throughout the room. I slowly left my hiding spot to quietly sneak my way to the oven, where the cupcakes were inside baking.

The smell of chocolate was in the air, and within a couple more minutes, they would be done.

The conversation happening in the other room left my mind as I put my focus in getting the cupcakes out of the oven, and onto the rack to cool. I'd have to decorate them later since the order was due tomorrow.

Mrs. Goode's daughter Sarah, the girl we had watched over a couple of times, had a birthday party tomorrow at five, and I'd promised Mrs. Goode that I would have them all ready.

I still had a couple more rounds to make, but I'd get it done even if I had to be up the entire night.

Sarah was such a sweet kid, and I put all my time and effort into making sure she had the perfect little cupcakes for her party.

While my back was turned, the kitchen door opened behind me. Obliviously, I slid on one oven mitt and maneuvered the cupcake pan out of the oven.

"Those cupcakes smell good." a husky voice spoke up suddenly from behind me. Being caught off guard, my heart shot out of my butt.

A shriek of pain left my lips the moment I jumped, the cupcake pan falling to the floor, and in my haste to save them, the mitt fell off my tiny hand and I grabbed the searing hot pan with my bare hands.

My hands burned like I was touching an open flame. Quickly I threw the pan on top of the oven and looked at my burning hands.

"Ow!"

"Holy fuck –" I heard Jungkook mutter from behind me. Instantly, his tattooed hands were on either side of my biceps, and twirling me around to face him. My head was turned downward, so I didn't see his face as he took both of my injured hands in his and observed them closely. "I'm so sorry — I–I didn't mean to scare you." his sad apologetic voice tugged at my heartstrings. I bit my lip as he led me over to the sink and held my hands underneath the icy cold water.

His front was firmly, closely pressed against my back, huddled towards me as his thumbs gently ran over my red palms.

I flushed a deep red at being so close to him and allowed him to continue to hold my hands under the steady stream of water. My head fell back, against my wishes, mind you, and rested on his rest.

The top of my head only met his pec.

Unknowingly, I allowed myself to bask in his touch, enjoying the way he was so close to me.

No man had ever been this close to me.

Ever.

And I liked it.

But I didn't want to like it as much as I did.

"I'm sorry, River." his guilty voice snapped me from my thoughts when the burning sensations dulled. "I swear I didn't mean to."

I licked at my dry lips, glad I wasn't facing him so he could see my blushed cheeks. "I-it's okay." I trailed off, "I should have been paying more attention." I added, not understanding why I wanted to reassure him.

"Still," he murmured, thumbs lazily rubbing circles along with my wrist. And I let him. The heat radiating off of him warmed my chilled body and I unconsciously snuggled against him.

Seeing this, Jungkook smiled above me and pressed closer, warming my body with his. "Do you need me to take you to the hospital? I-I don't mind," he suggested kindly.

Words left us. Jungkook and I only stood in front of the sink, water still running over my hands, both unwilling to part from one another.

While my head continued to rest against his pec, I couldn't help but wonder just why I was feeling...whatever this feeling was when I was near him – or even when I thought about him.

I didn't want to feel this...right?

This was something I had been agonizing over for months, and I was no closer to figuring it out than when I first tried to work through it.

Anxiety stole my breath away and I struggled to catch it back.

I wasn't ready for this.

And I wasn't sure I ever would be.

author's note ; ✨

hiiiii ~ ❤️✨

Thanks so much for reading!

— moon struck ; part 6

— genre ; strangers to friends to lovers, kinda grumpy x sunshine, fluff, angst, smut, angst with a happy ending 🥹

— warnings ; body insecurities ( mentioned ), eating disorder ( mentioned ), oc deals with a severe amount of anxiety and panic attacks, violence, smut ( later ), FLUFF, love struck jungkookie 🥹

— find me on Wattpad ; LivelyPotter

— word count ; 1.7k

— intro , part one, part two, part three, part four, part five

— 2024 © LivelyPotter all rights reserved

— taglist ; @ahgasegotarmy116 @jk97bam

river’s pov ; later that day ; 12 am

Where am I?

My eyes were closed, a slight breeze drifting through the warmed room I was in; chill bumps erupting over my barely clad body.

I furrowed my brows, heavy arms coming up to run over my body.

Why was I nearly naked? With only my panties covering my most sensitive area scantily covered with lace.

My heart thumped wildly within the confines of my ribcage.

What was happening? What was I doing here?

Was my body on...a bed?

If so, who's bed?

No matter how hard I tried, my eyes wouldn't open.

And it only caused me to be on the cusp of a panic attack. My toes wiggled impatiently, mind whirling trying to find a logical explanation for what I was going through.

My fingers ran over my palms, not finding the little blisters that had been on my hands since this morning.

The mattress sinking in beside my twitching body made me pause.

My mouth dried when the panic fled my body, as well as the fight to get my eyes to open.

A familiar smell entered my nostrils – a mix of comforting fabric softener, fresh soap, and the distinct smell of W. dress room New York 97 eau de cologne.

The scent alluded to my senses and calmed me. 

"Hey, pretty girl." a warm breath tickled my ear, causing a happy squeal to leave my lips. My body clearly knew who this...man was – but my mind did not. It felt like I should know who this is.

My eyes fought to open once more.

Warm fingertips ghosted down the plane of my chest, carefully rubbing the valley between my breasts.

"So cute." the deep smokey voice hummed contently, their face came down to rest against my sternum, putting a stop to my incessant wiggling.

The fingertips trailed softly down my body, touch so soft against my skin, as if they were afraid they would break me.

A strangled whimper left my lips.

I had never been touched like this.

And to my greatest shock, I wasn't wanting to move away anytime soon. I wanted this person to continue their teasing trail if anything.

My skin tingled when the touches strayed from their path and trailed up my waist.

"I've been dreaming about this moment for so long," a pair of lips met my ear and a pleased rumble left their mouth. "It's everything I've ever wanted."

I couldn't take it any longer.

Licking my lips, my mouth opened to speak.

"...w-who are you?"

Deep down, I knew the answer.

And apparently, he knew that I knew, too.

A kiss suddenly landed on my forehead, and he chuckled. The pair of big warm hands grasped my waist and just held me there firmly.

"Don't play coy, River." he husked against my jawline, soon placing a kiss to the underside. Pleasant tingles erupted where his lips had been. "You know exactly who I am."

My retort died on my tongue.

Another kiss landed on my exposed waist, easing my mind.

"Just open your eyes and accept it." his voice quaked inside the still-dark room. "Look at me."

My fists clenched and I shook my head repeatedly. "...I...I can't. I'm sorry." I wasn't ready to.

He now hovered over my body, palming my face in his big hands. Thumbs brushed over my eyelids, touch as light as a feather. 

"Just open your eyes, River," he repeated, his voice as soft as it always had been. I shook my head again, still in denial. "Open your eyes and just accept it...accept me."

I still refused to.

He tried again.

"River," he whispered, sadness coating his tone, and I felt my heart squeeze in fear. And in pain. "Open your eyes and accept your feelings. There's nothing to be afraid of," he said, lips just laid on mine.

My mind raced. My trembling hands came up and grasped a tight hold on his forearms as he braced his above mine. His muscular torso came down and rested against my bare chest.

"...'M scared to," I admitted, tightening my hold as the sweet touches on my face resumed.

"Don't be," he comforted me, thick muscular thighs coming down to rest alongside my own. "Accept your feelings...and you'll have me. Don't you want that? Hmm? I know I do."

"Open them." his voice was now a command. A tone of voice I had not heard before...but now, it had my body trembling in inexperienced need. Arousal bloomed between my thighs, and I clamped my legs together.

"Open them, River. Now." a hand found itself wrapped gently around my neck. The hold was firm and put me in my place.

My body fell lax against the bed. Core clenching, I licked at my lips. With great effort, my eyelids fluttered open, and looked at me man above me.

My heart fluttered the instant Jungkook watched me from above, a proud smile on his lips as he gazed down at me lovingly.

"There you are." His lips formed a beautiful smile that set my soul alight in the best of ways. "Good girl." he praised, pinching at my chubby cheek.

A strangled gasp left my lips once my eyes shot open.

The loud blaring of my alarm woke me from my small nap on the kitchen counter.

"The heck?" I mumbled, wiping the small amount of drool from my chin as I straightened my body with a wince.

My mind instantly went back to the dream I had experienced, and my face reddened. "Dingleberries' sake." I huffed to myself, patting my cheeks.

An uncomfortable sensation came upon me the moment the blisters on my hand caught in my hair.

I couldn't help the all over body flush that came over me whenever I thought of the dream I experienced. A wet one? Of sorts? I wasn't sure. What I did know is that it unnerved me.

I cringed and moved my hands to my side.

Becoming more awake by the second, I yawned and hopped off the stool.

Stretching my body, I decided to push the dream out of sight and out of mind as I raced over to the oven and grabbed a pair of oven mitts – being more careful and aware this time around when I took the cupcakes out of the oven.

After the events of this morning, the rest of the day was quite uneventful. Except when Jungkook came to pick up Moon.

Being embarrassed, I avoided him by staying inside the kitchen as he spoke with Sang about how Moon had been while he was away.

The little baby had mostly been with me like she had been for months on end. The more time I spent with her, the more baby fever grasped me.

Little Moon was everything I could ever want in a baby...and I hoped, that one day if I ever decided to get married, I would have a baby just as cute, intelligent, and gentle as she was.

Jungkook was so lucky to have fathered someone as perfect as her.

I also wondered about her mother. I wondered who she was, her name, and how Jungkook and her met.

I disliked the fact that I thought of such things.

It wasn't any of my business so I kept my inner thoughts to myself.

Who knew what Brett, Atlas, Sang, and my brothers would think if they heard me asking such questions?

They would think I liked him or something.

You do.

Shut. Up.

Scolding myself, I allowed the cupcakes to cool for a while before decorating them. Thankfully, it was the last batch, and the rest of them were already packaged up and ready to be picked up tomorrow.

I stayed at the daycare center late to be able to finish off the order after telling Sang I would be perfectly fine to stay by myself.

It creeped me out, staying alone here, but once these cupcakes were in the box, I could go home.

Humming lowly to myself, I twisted the icing bag and prepared to decorate the first cupcake. I placed the cupcakes on the counter I slept on, after washing it, of course, before I got to work.

Tiredness weighed upon me, and less than an hour later, all the cupcakes were finished and I was left feeling accomplished. 

"Great," I muttered to myself, throwing away the trash and cleaning off the kitchen. Furrowing my brows once my eyes caught onto a small envelope with my name across the front in pretty elegant writing, I snatched it off the counter and shoved it in my Marc Jacob's tote bag before I finished cleaning.

"And..done!" I cheered, observing the clean kitchen. With a quick glance at my phone – seeing it was nearly two am, I hurried out of the building after locking everything up, eagerly awaiting the moment I would get home.

third pov ; jeon jungkook ; 2 am

Guilt weighed heavily upon Jungkook's shoulders as he lay awake in bed, restlessly gazing up at the ceiling above him.

A grunt left his lips as he once more thought of the events of this morning.

Where he had frightened River ( again ), and caused her to accidentally burn her hands.

Fucking hell, he felt so bad.

It was all he had thought about all day.

He licked along the silver hoops in his bottom lip and sighed.

He guessed she was upset or blaming him for being the reason she had blisters on her pretty palms – even though she told him over and over she didn't. But his mind thought differently the moment she had avoided him when he came to pick up his Moon at the daycare center.

But she didn't need to blame him. He blamed himself enough for both of them.

"Fuck..." he groaned to himself, sitting up in bed, the white duvet falling off his bare torso. The man rubbed along the expanse of his neck and pouted his lips.

Would she forgive him? He hoped so.

Should he call Mi Cha and ask her what he should do? His hand reached towards the nightstand where his phone sat charging but paused.

No, he shouldn't. It was nearly three in the morning.

His gomo would murder him if he woke her up in the middle of the night just for him to ask her a question.

With a resigned sigh, Jungkook fell back on his mattress and moped sadly.

author's note ; ✨

I'm falling behind sm lmfaoo! I hope you enjoyed reading it! If you wanna be apart of the taglist, just lemme know!

— moon struck ; part 7

— genre ; strangers to friends to lovers, kinda grumpy x sunshine, fluff, angst, smut, angst with a happy ending 🥹

— warnings ; body insecurities ( mentioned ), eating disorder ( mentioned ), oc deals with a severe amount of anxiety and panic attacks, violence, smut ( later ), FLUFF, love struck jungkookie 🥹

— find me on Wattpad ; LivelyPotter

— word count ; 2.4k

— intro , part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six

— 2024 © LivelyPotter all rights reserved

— taglist ; @ahgasegotarmy116 @jk97bam

river's pov ; three pm

My stomach grumbled lowly, but I paid it no mind.

Instead, I turned my awe filled eyes down to a sleeping Moon – who decided to make my boobs her pillow.

Sang smiled softly at me and layed her head on my shoulder. "Brandon's planning on stopping by and staying with you while I'm gone helping Corey and Raven with an assignment."

"So he'll be staying with me for pickup?' relief relaxed my body. With Brandon here, I knew I wouldn't be as terrified as I would be if I was alone. My brother is one of the only people who who really calm me down and give me strength when I felt like I was failing ( but where Jungkook was concerned, I definitely was ).

Sang giggled, "He will. So you won't have to face Jungkook alone."

I tightened my hold on Moon, just holding the adorable baby just a little bit closer to me. Her little lips smacked sleepily when she nuzzled against my boobs.

I shook my head in amusement. Adorable baby.

"Yeah." That was totally true.

A flush decorated my cheeks when my mind went back to the dream I had. And hours before that; when my hands got burned.

Speaking of burned hands, the blisters had gotten way better after Sean stopped by the house this morning and applied some ointment onto my hands and wrapped them. According to him, I could take the bandages off tonight – but as of right now, I needed to let the ointment sink into my skin.

Gently rocking Moon back and forth, my thumb rubbed over her little rosy cheek in awe, completely in love with this adorable, sweet baby.

I hummed lowly, hugging her against my chest.

Sang watched the scene in front of her with a large sweet smile and took a seat beside me on the beanbag.

"So...has he texted you anymore?"

You just had to go there, didn't you?

I avoided her eyes, feeling my cheeks head, and decided to give my attention to Moon.

"Uh, yeah." I admitted, a shy grin coming over my lip – hiding from her. "A little bit."

"Like what?" her tone was teasing.

"...well he said it was okay that I replied a day or so late...and he apologized again for the whole oven incident even though it wasn't his fault." I explained, "It was mine. I wasn't paying attention when I should have and stupidly grabbed the freaking pan with my bare hands."

"Maybe he just wants to keep the conversation going," she said, "We all know he likes you–seems very interested—"

"River doesn't need all that in her life, sweetie." Brandon made his appearance. I sucked in a sharp breath, holding Moon tighter against me as my heart thumped crazily. She shifted a little in my arms, but otherwise remained unbothered.

"Shit!" Sang clutched her heart with widened eyes, "Where did you come from?" she asked her boyfriend. Brandon grinned and dropped a brown paper bag on the low table in front of me.

"Eat, Riv." he pointed to me, cerulean blue eyes drifting towards Sang. "I walked through the door. You just didn't notice me come in." he snickered, dropping a kiss on her lips.

While they greeted one another, I couldn't help but think over his words. River doesn't need all that in her life. He can't decide for me. Annoyance burned my insides causing me to glare at my brother out of the corner of my eye.

I held onto Moon gently, protectively, shielding her from my brother's eyes.

"What do you mean by that?" I couldn't help but snap – the anger in my voice couldn't be ignored.

Bradon and Sang's head swiveled in my direction, eyes widened at my anger. I glared at my brother, warning him to spew even more shit.

Brandon opened and closed his mouth, searching for something today. Meanwhile Sang moved to stand behind him, rifling through some paperwork, hiding a pleased smirk. I knew she was listening closer than Brandon thought she was.

Just who did he think he was?

Don't get me wrong – I loved my brother and I'm grateful for all he's done to me. But he doesn't get to control my life. He doesn't get to decide what's bad or good for me without my consent.

"Well?" I insisted, eyes squinting, prodding at him to say something.

Brandon sighed heavily and leveled me with stern glare. "I'm only looking out for you, River." he said, peeking down at the child in my arms. "You're almost twenty years old – young, you have an entire beautiful life ahead of you...and Jungkook...well..." he hesitated for a slight moment.

I nodded at him to continue, my anger not leaving but rising.

"The man is twenty-six years old. He's divorced and has a baby, River. He's basically already went through life, if you really think about it — marriage, kids, collage — you name it — he's probably experienced it. And if you ever decided to be in a relationship with him, you'll always be fifth in line to him, River. He's got his daughter to think of, his family, his job, and his ex-fucking-wife. Do you want to got through life knowing you'll always be fifth to him?"

Emotion clogged my throat.

Fifth.

That hurt. Way more than it should – especially if it was Brandon saying it.

Yeah. Jungkook didn't really need to add me and my problems in his life at this point. I wouldn't be any good for Jungkook, anyway. He's way too good for someone like me.

My brother's face crumbled in sadness, knowing that his words hurt. By now, Sang watched me over Brandon's shoulder sadly, her usual happy eyes dimming. My eyes slightly glossed over and before I could lost even more control over my emotions, I turned my face downwards and watched Moon.

Fifth.

"...I'm sorry, Pixie." Brandon spoke sadly, "It's just–you're my little sister...and I want you to be happy...and I...I don't want you to be fifth to anyone. Ever. You deserve to be loved, cherished, thought of constantly...and you deserve a fresh start in life. Where you can meet someone, fall in love, get married – and hell, even have babies of your own. Your own family." he said, patting the top of my head, eyes watching me closely. "I just don't want you regretting anything years later without thinking everything through."

I nodded quietly.

"Yeah." I forced out, making my eyes never waver from Moon's face. I sought comfort in her cuddles and in her presence while the air between my brother and I grew stifling.

But, as I sat there, in my own world, the insecure thoughts that constantly plagued me for most of my life broke out from the box I had shut them in years ago.

The feelings of those emotions and thoughts was overwhelming, and every limb shook.

It was even harder to breathe than normal.

I sucked in lungfuls of air slowly, to not arouse suspicion in my brother and anchored myself to Moon to grasp ahold of myself.

river's pov ; five pm

Two hours passed by slowly.

And I was sinking further into myself, allowing those same emotions that tore me down, time and time again, chip away at the shields I used to protect myself.

I was in a daze – hardly becoming alert to anything.

Even Jungkook.

My eyes were blank from emotion when he walked inside with a bright grin and a happy disposition, finding me instantly. I silently handed him a happy Moon and walked away to pack her bag.

His smile dimmed and his eyes grew confused at my odd actions.

Brandon followed after me closely, hardly allowing me personal space as he spoke calming words into my ears. I was close to wanting to shut down and blank out for a while.

Jungkook watched me closely, his chunky combat boots thumping heavily on the ground when I hugged Brandon in thanks, Moon's backpack in my hand, before resuming my stride to him.

"So, uh, how was she?" Jungkook scratched at the back of his neck, sending me a shy smile, boba eyes gleaming when I focused my attention on him.

I forced a tiny smile and avoided his eyes, feeling agony flare inside my heart.

Why did this hurt so bad? I wasn't fully sure if I really really liked him. But now I would have to let him go and move on with my life.

Isn't this happening too fast and not crash down on me so suddenly?

"She was perfect." I ground out, wanting nothing more to cuddle into his waist, like Moon, and sob. Even though I avoided him like the plague, I still knew more than I ought to about him, so I knew that he was good at comforting people. And he was warm. So warm. Maybe it would melt away the ice that seemed to make my limbs grow stiff and cold. "...As always."

Anyone could detect the hidden sadness in my voice.

Why was I acting like this in front of him? I didn't want to.

Stupid heart. Stupid emotions. Stupid me.

Jungkook hoisted his little daughter further up his chest and watched me, perfectly dark arched brow drawing together, silver piercing catching the light. His pink lips parted, licking at the double hoops threaded through his lips and gulped slightly.

"What's wrong, River?" he asked softly, voice growing quieter when he took a step closer to me, the toes of his shoes softly touching mine. His tattooed hand carefully reached out and stopped inches from my own, hesitating.

Oh god.

With him watching me with such a soft look in his eyes, the feelings I tried so hard to mask, to hide, to disappear, came upon me in less than a second. They hit me harder than I could have ever imagined – and I stumbled back, fingers tingling with the effort to not reach out and brush my hand along his.

All I could seem to think about was him. Him. Him. Him. Him.

I sucked in a sharp breath, tears stinging my eyes as another thought hit me.

Brandon's words.

My own insecurities.

I was fooling myself into thinking–...nevermind.

I would be nothing but a burden to him – he's got enough to worry about.

Wouldn't be good for him.

No.

No.

No.

"I'm fine." I whispered weakly.

I'm not. I'm really not. Just hold me and make me forget everything.

Please.

It hurts.

It became harder to breathe. My lungs expanded to gulp down more air, but it was a futile effort. My knees shook underneath my weight.

If I didn't get out of here soon, I'd fall.

Everything I'd been trying so hard to push away, came crashing down the moment I was in his presence, walls down for the first time in years. Brandon's words damaged them...I was weak, healing, in the process of rebuilding...and then he came in.

And tore them down. Completely.

I was vulnerable.

My eyes met his in a silent plead.

I just wanted to go home and cuddle with Kingston.

Hold me. Make me forget. It hurts.

"River?" His strong, gentle voice made me break even more. It took every ounce of strength inside my body not to crumble. "Nae Sarang, what's the matter?"

I cried a little more on the inside.

Moon sleepily nuzzled into Jungkook neck's and cutely tugged on the multiple earrings in his ears, momentarily taking his attention. "Shhh, baby, just a moment." he cooed to his baby, nuzzling his nose with hers, worry still apparent in his eyes when he turned his eyes to me.

My limbs grew colder. I was reminded. I shouldn't bring him into my problems. He didn't deserve that. He's got sweet little Moon and his own life to worry about. Fifth. Fifth. Fifth.

Despite the agony within my heart and in my soul, I blinked away the tears.

"I have to close in a few minutes." my voice didn't sound like my own. It was detached and just plain sad.

And even he noticed.

His doe eyes grew panicked and he slowly nodded, "...oh...okay." he let out, body towering over mine. I could still feel him peeking down at me shyly as I died just a little more on the inside.

He licked his lips again and swallowed, big hand falling onto Moon's back, rubbing her little shoulders gently. Looking like he was thinking of what to say, I backed away.

I have to get out of here. Away from him. Gain control of myself.

Jungkook took a step after me, and although he looked shy – which contrasted to his appearance – he looked determined.

"No." he spoke firmly, yet gentle, "You're not fine, Nae Sarang." I gulped as the tears stung my eyes once more. Jungkook saw my eyes glaze over and stopped. His stern expression crumbled, and now he only looked worried.

"How about you come with Moon and I...to the italian restaurant and we'll talk, yeah?"

My head bowed as a tear fled my eye and dropped onto the top of his shiny black combat boot. A sniffle left my nose, and i berated myself for it.

"...I..." it was going to hurt saying this. "I...can't." I shook my head and turned around so my back faced him. "I'm sorry. I have to go."

I couldn't stand to be in this room any longer.

I ran out of the room, baspassing my distressed brother, and hightailed it to the bathroom at the back of the building.

My body shook with the effort.

I sobbed quietly into my hands and slid to the ground, unable to hold myself up any longer. My heart beat unnaturally fast – too fast.

I wrapped my arms around my knees and fought to catch my breath.

The tears just wouldn't stop flowing.

My arms and legs trembled violently in my grip, and I felt like I was losing myself.

In the throes of my misfortune, familiar arms wound around me and cradled my face.

"Shhh, River." cerculean blue eyes gazed into my own – only theirs were more panicked than mine was.

"Breathe, Riv – you gotta breathe."

"Brandon." his name left my mouth in a shallow gasp. I clutched onto his shirt and let him ground me for the time being. "Brandon." I sniffled, severely out of breath.

I laid against him, entirely exhausted by everything.

Brandon picked up my limp body and carried me outside while I watched the sky darken with only one thought on my mind.

My eyes were now opened.

author's note ; ✨

🥲

I thought you had brought that big moon over to my house cause you were so in love and woke me up with it. I was half asleep, I guess. I didn't know any better.

Moonstruck (1987) dir. Norman Jewison

I ain’t no freakin’ monument to justice!

THE FIRST OF THE LAST PART NO STOP WTF I AM SCREAMING, THIS WILL MAKE ME IN.SANE. INSANE I SW3AR, AND I DON'T EVEN HAVE ANY EMOJI TO DESCRIBE HOW I FEEL 🫵😭

𝐝𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐥'𝐬 𝐤𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬' 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐲 | 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟕.𝟏

SYNOPSIS: Embarking on a new journey was definitely the best decision you have ever made. Ever since your new life started out on the very place you have ever dreamed of visiting, which has now become your reality, everything works in your favour. But you can't deny the fact that deep down inside, you miss the ones who were a major part of your life. Just like that, the universe seems to favour you as you now find yourself in a predicament involving being chased by the very past you thought you had left for good.

PAIRING: non!idols enha hyung line x fem!reader

GENRE: 18+ (mdni), semi-college au, adulthood, reverse harem, dark themes.

WARNINGS: profanities, explicit themes, heavy angst, mention of violence, alcohol consumption, manipulation, corruption, toxicity, smuts, unprotected sex (no!), dom!enha, mild switch!jake, mild switch!reader, name calling, degradation, knife play, manhandling, bondage, blowjobs, throat-fucking, fingering, nipple play, pussy slapping & eating, anal, double penetrations, edging, crying, squirting, creampies, breeding kink, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, threesomes-fivesomes.

WORD COUNT: 26.9k

FEATURING: le sserafim, ive, aespa, cha eunwoo, byeon wooseok.

DISCLAIMER: this fic is inspired by devil's night series written by penelope douglas!

PLAYLIST: Delicate - Taylor Swift, I Don't Wanna Live Forever - Taylor Swift & Zayn Malik, Reminder - The Weeknd, Party Monster - The Weeknd, Bloodline - Ariana Grande, Touch It - Ariana Grande, run for the hills - Tate McRae, Animals - Maroon 5, Lights Down Low - Maejor (feat. Waka Flocka Flame), Rude Boy - Rihanna, Softcore - The Neighbourhood.

RUBY'S NOTE: this part, i would say, is not as focused on them with y/n, but part 7.2 & 7.3 will be heavily focused on the building of their relationship and etc, so it's boring. do wait patiently for their actual romance we have been deprive of <3

PREV (PART 6.3) | NEXT (PART 7.2) ✘ SERIES MASTERLIST ✘

After hectic weeks of appeasing clients’ finicky demands and exceeding their expectations, which ensued in you receiving a scant sleep, you are more than deserving to pamper yourself for your competence and industrious work once more. By pampering, it means heading over to the upscale bar downtown to meet up with your best friend whom you haven’t seen in weeks due to respective work and interests.

Besides, what better way to spend your Friday night than to drink to your heart’s content and get wasted with your best friend? Well, maybe not too wasted, considering that your alcohol tolerance has significantly improved over the course of your engagement in spiritious refreshments.

Oh, the lovely irony of how the old you would never have indulged in such indecorous engagement and would totally reprimand the new version of you. Yeah, the old you, as in the saint you once were. Now that you think about it, a lot has changed, including you. 

You hold back a chuckle, your lips pressing together to form a smile that exhibits your amiability towards the refined patrons passing by you, who in return reciprocate the same courtesy to you as you step aside for them to exit the establishment. One of the many things you appreciate here is that the locals are friendly, including your fellow residents in your apartment building. There is never a day where not a smiling face greets you wherever you go.

As soon as you infiltrate further into the establishment that is furnished with lavish decors and embellishments, your keen eyes glide across the throng of patrons luxuriating and mingling with each other before they land on a certain brunette glammed up in voguish-worthy apparel, who is seated by the end of the extensive booth.

With a smile on your tinted lips, you proceed to make your way towards her, your hurried steps displaying your enthusiasm in finally meeting your best friend, who also turns out to be a saviour, or maybe even a guardian angel. Without her, you know that you wouldn’t have survived on your first arrival here a year ago.

Yes, it has been a year since you decided to wipe the slate clean and embarked on your new life in Milan, Italy — the city you’ve always dreamed of travelling to, which has now become your reality, or perhaps even better now that you have decided to live here.

“Y/N!” Yunjin, or rather Jennifer, heartily greets you with a dazzling toothy-smile as soon as she turns around. Initially, it felt weird to call her by her English name since you were more than accustomed to her Korean name throughout the years you have known her, but you decided to comply with her insistence.

“Jen!” You reciprocate the heartfelt greeting, your face beaming with a smile as she latches her arms around you to give you a bear-crushing hug before you exchange cheek kisses with her.

As she examines you, her eyes gleam with approval that aligns with the smile on her lips. “Girl, I swear you look prettier than the last time I saw you. I absolutely adore your dress!”

Warmth tingles in your chest, taking pride in your newfound fashion taste. It really isn’t anything special as you are dolled up in a simple off-shoulder ruffled-waisted black dress that reaches way above your knee length, but to hear a compliment from the very person who has been a tremendous help throughout the beginning of your journey feels rewarding, especially after you took many of her advices to heart.

“Thank you.” Your sincerity shines through your tone and crescent-shaped eyes. “You don’t look bad yourself. Dazzling as ever on this fine evening. Makes me wonder why you didn’t opt to work as a fashion designer instead.” You merely jest, casting her a smirk as you slide over next to her high seat.

Jennifer rolls her eyes. “I love dressing up, not designing. There’s a difference.” She states, to which you brush off since you know your best friend that much, while you flag down the bartender and give her your drink order.

As Jennifer begins the flow of your conversation, your eyes soften as you look at the animated glow in her demeanour. It seems that you’re not the only one who has changed much. The Yunjin you once knew back in Seoul is still there, but there is something different about the Yunjin in front of you. She has this specific glow and in the way she carries herself now that you can’t put into words to describe. It is almost as if back in Seoul, she didn’t have the chance to release her fullest potential, or perhaps the real her.

Of course, she didn’t, especially when you knew that she wasn’t exactly happy back in Seoul as she had to live with her mother and stepfather against her will. As it turned out, her parents got divorced during the period when you lost contact with her in your adolescence years, and initially, she didn’t want to leave Milan, where her father had been a permanent citizen here, but her mother won custody over her. Hence, you two meet again at the start of university.

Now that her mother has long since focused on her stepsiblings, Jennifer used this opportunity to return to her father in Milan. As for her father, you recall the first time you met him just a few days after your arrival here, and you admit how greatly intimidated you were by his imposing figure beneath the thousand-dollar polished suit as well as his steely demeanour when he scanned you from head-to-toe.

But soon enough, after Jennifer formally introduced you to her father, he finally recognised you as his daughter’s childhood best friend, and so his steely demeanour melted, replaced by something so fatherly that he cordially welcomed you with a big smile and a hug.

Aside from her mother’s wealth, it makes sense why your best friend has an abundance of wealth, as her father is an esteemed CEO who oversees all business operations across multiple diversions in the fashion industry in Milan, including organising the semi-annual popular Milan fashion week. Thanks to the powers and connections he wields, he manages to secure a career for his beloved daughter, ensuing her position as an international marketing specialist, to which is her ability to perform remarkably ever since, thanks to her degree in international business.

Whenever you see the sweet, endearing interaction between the father and daughter, a fleeting yet profound sadness hits you, accompanied by envy, as they remind you so much of the dynamic between you and your father. It does make you want to return to Seoul on impulse, but you know you can’t when your resolve to be here is permanent.

Plus, you have a career now, and you owe it all to Jennifer and her father, who helped you from the start after you mapped out your options of which career path you truly desire most. Honestly, there was none, but you obviously couldn’t live here without any income, and you felt awful for having to spend Jennifer and her father’s wealth despite their insistence, as they had pure intentions to help you get on your feet and stabilise yourself.

After much deliberation, you decided to pursue a career that is obviously equivalent in value with your degree in journalism. Hence, you are a freelance writer who is completely diverse and wields prowess in the field that you are specialised in. It was a rocky start, but eventually you gained momentum.

You have grown to love your job because not only do you have flexibility in choosing projects, setting your own schedules, and working from various locations, but this job also allows you to meet new people, aka your clients. Since your line of work involves socialising, you don’t really feel as timid as you were before, and instead, meeting different people elevates your self-confidence. Even more when your clients always seem to leave with satisfactory written all over them as well as in their feedback due to your top-notch professionalism.

You didn’t earn much in the beginning, but now, with your experiences and continuous improvement in your expertise, you earn more than you expected, for which you are thankful as your income keeps you going here, especially when you have every intention to repay Jennifer and her father, although they will always refuse whatever you wish to repay them.

Genuinely, from the bottom of your heart, you will always feel eternally grateful to Jennifer and her father. Without them, you would’ve lived out in the streets instead of the sumptuous three-room apartment, which the father-daughter duo decisively chose for you despite your objection to their generosity once more.

From the moment you first stepped into the vacant apartment and spotted the balcony situated adjacently at the living room, you immediately fell in love with the picturesque metropolitan that looked even more vibrant at night, as it was exactly what you had envisioned of your dream apartment with a stunning view to wake up to. Plus, where you live is a thirty-minute drive away from the renowned Galleria Vittorio Emanuele II.

Although your new residency falls under the deluxe category, you tried your utmost by furnishing and decorating your apartment more homely, albeit there is a discernible emptiness you can’t seem to disregard amidst everything that you have put effort into your new residency, especially when there is an annoying throb in your heart.

Nevertheless, you feel content because you have everything you need now — a job, a place you call your sanctuary, a father figure who cares and loves you like you’re his own daughter, best friends who have been incredibly supportive of you even if two of them are across the globe. Plus, you are independent now, including the fact that your mental health has long since significantly improved thanks to Jennifer’s suggestion to seek therapy from professionals.

No longer are you tormented by the dark, unpleasant memories from your old life in Seoul that used to haunt you every day and night in the rocky start of your new adventure here. No longer are you allowing anyone to trample over you and question your own worth.

Everything in your life right now is simply bliss, never mind the fact that you haven’t had sex ever since them, although there are times where you need to indulge and gratify your unabating libido, to which you brazenly bought a rather special rose vibrator. Sure, you did go to nightclubs, be it alone or with your best friend, and make out with hot strangers, but you didn’t go as far. You knew that no one could ever satisfy you the way you wanted, or maybe a part of you so deep didn’t want to betray them.

Your eyes harden as you place down the glass a little harder on the counter booth, drawing your best friend’s attention. “Hey, are you okay?” Jennifer asks softly, her eyes examining your countenance, which you swiftly mask with a deceptive facade as you cast her a smile.

“Of course. I was just thinking about this one prissy client of mine.” You lie through your teeth, forcing out a chuckle, and thankfully, she seems to buy it before proceeding to continue where she left off.

Ugh, why are you even thinking about them? You are very content with everything you have now, and you have been doing perfectly fine without them for about a year now. 

Before you can get too carried away to delve into it, your attention is drawn to Jennifer, whose eyes light up as she looks over your shoulder with a smile on her countenance, prompting you to look as well, only to be met by two familiar males looming over your figures, each decked out in distinct yet voguish-worthy apparel just the same.

“What a lovely evening coincidence. Are you ladies sure you didn’t stalk us?” One of them teases; his pink plump lips stretch into a charming smile while his eyes dart between you and Jennifer.

Jennifer scoffs with the corner of her lips curving. “It should be the opposite, don’t you think, Wooseok? Seriously, out of all the places.” She shakes her head before flickering her gaze at her cousin. “What are you doing here, Eunwoo? I thought you were flying to Venice.”

The aforementioned raven-haired male adorns a smile on his face, shifting his gaze from your face to Jennifer. “It turns out that I won’t be needing to fly to Venice any time soon.”

“So, mind if we sit with you?” Wooseok inquires, ignoring Jennifer’s disbelieving yet playful glare as he settles next to her while Eunwoo invites himself next to your booth.

Right, you have forgotten to add these two handsome guys that have now become acquaintances in your new life here. Byeon Wooseok and Cha Eunwoo.

Just like any other person, you were quite taken aback by their striking visual when Jennifer introduced you to them. Of course, you felt a tad timorous of being in the presence of two charming men with distinct allures, but as time passed by, you have grown comfortable with them and their wits. Apparently, Eunwoo is Jennifer’s cousin from her father’s side, whereas Wooseok is Eunwoo’s best friend since birth. According to Eunwoo, he and Wooseok come as a package.

You recall when Jennifer attempted to match you with her cousin, resulting in you going for a date with Eunwoo, only because Jennifer was adamant and both you and Eunwoo wanted to get it over with to see if you two were compatible.

It turned out that you were better off friends with him despite the fact that there are times where you do playfully flirt with him and Wooseok, but that’s how the dynamic has always been with them in your friendship circle. Plus, they care for you and see you as their female friend only.

Sure, both Eunwoo and Wooseok are charming gentlemen who also oversee their family business, and they are more than capable of providing for you, but your heart doesn’t beat for any of them the way it did before with certain individuals, not even a fluttery sensation.

Your heart is adamant, and as much as you hate to admit it, no one can come close to and ever be compared to the four individuals who are now in the past that you have long since put behind you, but why are you even thinking about them now after all your efforts to forget them?

You are very content with the present, so why the fuck is there a palpable longing in your once-shattered heart that you had mended yourself? After so long, why now?

Gripping the glass of cocktail, you proceed to down the liquor rather gluttonously, drawing their attention to you by your abrupt vigour as they watch you with quizzical eyes.

“Slow down. You’ll choke yourself. You can always order for more.” Eunwoo’s gentle reprimand does nothing to dispel the ache you can feel in your chest.

Perhaps rather than effacing everything about them, you repressed every feeling, thought, scent, and face of theirs so deep in the trenches that you have grown accustomed to the point where you are in denial.

“Oh, definitely. Bartender!” You flag down for the bartender again to give her the previous order and double them, earning bewildered stares from your friends.

“Someone is eager to get drunk tonight.” Wooseok comments, oblivious to the fact that you are actually drowning out your sorrows as he watches you take a swig in awe.

“Y/N, I think that’s enough.” Eunwoo attempts to snatch away one of the glasses, but you snappily swat his hand away as you shoot him a scowl. He heaves a sigh before catching Jennifer’s gaze and spotting a flicker of understanding in her eyes as she examines you.

Jennifer has an inkling that something must’ve bothered you, and she doesn’t comment on it, knowing that she’ll only worsen things. She catches Eunwoo’s questioning gaze and shakes her head, conveying her disapproval to leave you be.

“Relax. I have high alcohol tolerance, remember?” You tell him, merely casting him a lazy grin that doesn’t reach your eyes before bringing the glass to your lips again.

It isn’t long when Jennifer receives a call that requires her to head back to her office since she left some important documents that she intended to bring back home while Wooseok offers her a ride, to which she gratefully accepts before bidding you a goodbye, now leaving you alone with Eunwoo.

Heck, you even seem to forget that the older male is still seated next to you as you are preoccupied with your disoriented mind while downing glass after glass of Milano Torino uninhibitedly, hoping that the alcohol will dispel the yearning ache in your chest, until he decides to break the ice after observing you.

“You’re obviously not fine.” Eunwoo points out, his eyes meeting yours and noticing how they seem to glisten with inexplicable emotions under this resplendent lighting. “Talk to me. What is bothering you?”

“I’m fine. You don’t have to play therapy with me.” You scoff out, looking away from his intent gaze to finish up your fifth glass. For a moment, there is silence while the background fades into insignificance, only the sound of your heartbeat in your ear as you stare into oblivion with hollow eyes.

Then suddenly, you feel something nudges you into confiding in Eunwoo, or maybe just allows him to gain a miniscule insight into your concealed vulnerability, even though you swore that you would never allow anyone to catch a glimpse of that vulnerability of yours after establishing an adamantine bearing.

Yeah, this has to be the alcohol-thinking that got your mind into a state of chaos. It seems like your high tolerance decides to betray you tonight.

“Have you ever been in love?” The question leaves your lips against your will before you can stop yourself. Oh, who are you kidding? There is no stopping, especially when you can feel the influence of alcohol affecting your whole being.

Eunwoo’s dark eyebrows jump up in surprise at the unexpected question, though he feels a tad amused by it, as evident in the way his lips form into a wistful smile. “I have, but it’s been years since we decided to break off the engagement and parted ways.”

It isn’t entirely surprising to you that Eunwoo had been in a relationship, especially with a divine face card like his. You hum in acknowledgement, languidly bringing another glass of liquor to your lips. “So what caused the rift in your relationship?” You decide to distract yourself by focusing on him instead.

A flicker of sadness is palpable in his eyes amidst the glistening reminiscentness before he looks down at his half-empty whiskey. “She wasn’t ready to be fully committed and didn’t want to move our relationship to the next level because she still wanted to travel and enjoy what the world had to offer.”

You can’t resist rolling your eyes at his statement. “She could’ve still travelled and enjoyed it even after tying the knots with you. It’s definitely her loss, then. You’re a total package. Rich and handsome.” You state rather bluntly.

Eunwoo heaves a sigh, unfazed by your monotonous flattering remarks. “It’s fine. We ended on good terms anyway. Now, your turn. Have you ever been in love?” He bounces the question back to you.

You feign a wince, scrunching your nose lightly while you dismiss the way your heart throbs painfully. “Tricky question. I don’t really know how to answer that.” You say brusquely as you suddenly find your glass rather interesting.

Eunwoo scoffs lightly, his eyes narrowing at you in suspicion. “More like you’re trying to dodge the question. Why are you afraid of answering?”

You can’t help but feel snappy. “I’m not afraid. I just feel like it’s a stupid question.” You tell him with a scowl on your face. “Forget what I asked earlier. Let’s just pretend that this conversation didn’t happen.”

“You’ve been in love before.” It isn’t a question, to which you feel as though his proclamation smacks you in the face, and when your wavering eyes meet his, he knows that he is right.

Despite the fact that Eunwoo manages to break through the equanimity you vehemently try to retain, your demeanour remains one of indifference as you look away from his invasive eyes. “It was a mistake of mine that I don’t intend to make again.” You utter dryly before taking another swig of your liquor.

Eunwoo winces lightly, recognising the fleeting heartbreak in your icy-glimmering eyes. “Was it that bad?”

“It’s complicated. We weren’t exactly in a relationship, but─ “ You grimace, refusing to make a trip down memory lane. “Let’s just say I was the one who removed myself from their lives permanently of my own accord. It was for the best.”

“Them?” Eunwoo raises his eyebrow inquisitively. “So there was more than one person you fell in love with?”

You narrow your eyes at him accusingly. “Is that judgement I sense?”

Eunwoo raises his hands up defensively. “Hey, I was merely curious. Besides, it’s totally normal for you to fall in love with more than one person. You can’t help with who you love.”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.” Your lighthearted chuckles carry an undercurrent of bitterness. “You would’ve seen me differently if you knew of my past, but unfortunately for you, I’m not one to recall what I’ve tried so hard to bury.”

“Trust me, whatever past you had, I would still see you the lovely and elegant Y/N Kang just as you are now.” Eunwoo reassures you, offering you a small smile as he pats your head gently before glancing down at his wristwatch. “I would love to listen to your whole life story, but it’s getting late and I have work the next morning.”

“Boooo. Only fools like you work on a weekend.” You make a face at him, to which he responds with a head shake and a chuckle emitting from him. “Seriously, working on a weekend is too excessive, even for you. How are you even going to date someone if you always spend your days at the office? At this rate, you’ll grow old and wrinkly alone because you’re always busy with work.”

“Thank you for your concern towards my dating life. Unfortunately for you, I don’t intend to date anyone anytime soon.” His amusing tone drips with sarcasm as he gets off his seat, adjusting his coat around his body. “Come on. I’ll send you back to your place.”

“Thanks for the offer, but I’d like to stay here a little longer.” You decline, earning yourself a disapproving yet concern frown from him.

“It’s nearly eleven, Y/N. The bar will be closing in a few hours, and it’s dangerous for you to go back alone at night.”

You sigh, getting a tad annoyed. “Eunwoo, I’ve always gone back on my own, and I turned out just fine. Even if someone were to assault me or follow me, I have pepper spray with me, so don't worry.”

Eunwoo hesitates. “But─”

“I also need some time alone to think.” You cut him off, insisting vehemently before softening your tone. “Please.”

Eunwoo eventually concedes, his lips pressing thinly as he stares at you. “Fine. Call me or Wooseok if you detect the slightest danger. I mean it.”

“I will.” You tell him, your tone providing him the assurance he needed before he embraces you with a side hug and proceeds to depart from the establishment, where only a few patrons are left, much to your surprise. Just earlier, there were a throng of them.

You redirect your focus on the two leftover glasses of yours. Pursing your lips, you reach out to grab one before taking leisure sips, and this time, the wave of inebriation hits you harder compared to the previous drinks you had while the liquor sends a burning sensation down your throat that coupled with the emotions you painfully restrain from making any utterance.

Desperate to quell those emotions, you take a last swig of your drink rather aggressively before placing down the glass and wiping the excess moisture from your upper lip. But it doesn’t help. Instead, you feel the restrained emotions breaking into a tumult that racks through your body.

Fuck, you should not have thought about them in the first place, especially when they trigger something in you that feels like a kill switch. Oddly, tears never spring up in your eyes, but rather, you feel wholly numb that even the goosebumps arising on your skin due to the lack of warmth layer clothing to barrier the temperature doesn’t deter you.

Maybe it was a good idea for Eunwoo and the others to leave you, but at the same time, maybe it isn’t a good idea for you to dwell over your past as the wounds slowly reopen. Maybe, just for tonight, you allow your inhibitions to be let loose as you finally come to admit defeat against your tenacity.

“Ugh, who am I kidding?” You mumble to yourself as you rub your forehead, facing down to the counter.

Yes, you admit that despite the fact that your life is going well, the inhibited part of you truly misses them and influences you into thinking that without them is simply just a cruel existence that you chose to feign ignorance to, when in the deepest depths of your heart, all you ever want is to call their names until they come back home to you.

But after what happened in the past, you are often caught up in a dilemma that keeps you up at night sometimes as you reevaluate every of your choices with one thing stuck in your mind — wondering if you dodged the bullets or just lost the loves of your life.

You wonder at times if they care enough to notice your permanent departure from Seoul, and just when disappointment is about to seep through you, you recall that you had deleted your old contact number as well as your phone in any case they decided to track you down, but considering that it’s been a year, it is more than apparent that you won’t be stumbling upon them since they had no idea of where you truly are now.

A drunkard chuckle leaves your lips at the irony of you thinking and missing them when you were the one who resolutely decided to remove your existence from their lives.

Whenever you walk around in a place full of people, and even now as you scan your surroundings for another time, your subconscious always sees them around in all these empty faces, despite the glow in their demeanour.

In the end, the heart will always want what it wants, no matter how much exertion you put into repressing the dangerous emotions in it.

Feeling an incessant pounding by all the pensiveness as well as the amount of glasses you drank, you opt to rest with your head that gradually feels heavy on your folded arms pressing onto the countertop, facing sideways. You close your eyes, hoping to dispel any lingering thoughts about them, but it is futile because, behind your closed lids, you can see their faces.

You snap your eyes open, only staring blankly at the wall while you can hear the sound of your mended heart cracking. Oh, you are most definitely drunk, because how is it possible that your heart has a palpable longing that hurts so much you can physically feel it?

You want to cry, you do. But it is as though you run out of tears after the times you weeped in your sleep at night in the beginning. Instead, your eyelids feel heavier, threatening to close before you finally yield and allow sleep to take over your vulnerable figure seated by the booth alone.

Though sleep has beckoned, you are still faintly conscious enough to feel something so warm and fairly large enveloping your shivering figure, providing a barrier to withstand the cold temperature, and you swear you feel fingertips tracing down your temple so delicately and warm lips pressing on your cheek before sleep eventually engulfs you whole.

Of course, sleep doesn’t last that long as you find yourself being jolted awake naturally, prompting you to flutter your eyelids open and noticing that you are still in the same bar. The nap was so good that you even find yourself being utterly disoriented.

You slowly raise your upper body with the intention to check your surroundings, but you halt at the moment a familiar cologne hits your nostril emanating from the leather jacket hung over your figure, causing you to freeze in your seat and panic because you recognise his cologne so vividly.

No, this couldn’t be his jacket. There is absolutely no way it belongs to him. You turn around to scan your surroundings with attentive eyes, only to spot a couple seated in the centre of the bar. Otherwise, nothing seems out of the ordinary.

“Excuse me.” You call for the bartender again with an entirely different purpose as she approaches you, noticing how panicked you look. “Have you seen anyone giving me this jacket while taking a nap?”

Much to your surprise, the bartender nods her head, kindling a hope in your chest. “Yes. He turned out to be a fine gentleman who, by the way, also paid for your drinks. It’s a shame that you were asleep. You should’ve seen how handsome that man was.” She gushes dreamily whereas you scratch your head, confused yet terrified at the thought that it could be any one of them, but it is impossible for them to find you, let alone to be in the same bar as you are now.

Positive thoughts, positive thoughts ─ that’s what you keep telling yourself while attempting to calm yourself down. Maybe this jacket belongs to a thoughtful stranger, and the familiar smell of his cologne is just a mere coincidence. Maybe you are being paranoid over nothing.

You give yourself a firm head nod. Yeah, you definitely are most definitely paranoid.

Deciding to head back to your apartment, you quickly book an Uber on your phone while you ignore the fact that you are getting comfortable with the leather jacket hugging you. It isn’t long when your Uber ride has arrived, prompting you to make your departure after thanking the bartender for her service. You don’t know why, but the jacket remains in your possession as it hangs around your figure. 

Once you step foot outside of the establishment, you spot the exact plate number as your Uber ride by the curb before you proceed forward. Reaching the black Audi, you are about to open the door to the backseat when you feel a wave of chills through you, and no, it’s not from the breeze.

It is the kind of chill where you feel as though someone is watching you from afar, and you swear you can feel the unknown source of burning gazes that prompt you to look at the car just a few parks away from the pavement curb, a red Lamborghini.

Due to the dim lighting, you squint your eyes in vain as you are unable to make out the person inside the car, but the engine is definitely running. Again, maybe you are being paranoid or just drunk since your head is pounding twice harder now.

You shrug the feeling off before proceeding to enter the black Audi, and you silently thank God that the driver is not the chatty type, allowing yourself to rest comfortably in the backseat and facing the window.

Just as sleep is about to take over you again, you spot something in the rearview mirror. Wait, not something, but the red Lamborghini you saw earlier, revving forward, albeit slowly. Again, you shrug it off, not wanting to freak yourself out over something so trivial, assuring yourself that it is merely a coincidence that the red Lamborghini is heading in the same route as you.

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

If there is one thing you hate about being able to tolerate any amount of alcoholic consumption is the fact you are not entirely immune to the hangover that strikes you as soon as you groggily wake up.

The pounding headache persists; even after you freshen yourself up as you head to the kitchen, your hair slightly dampens from showering. As you open your fridge to grab a bottle of water, the frown on your lips deepens when the recollection of last night finally hits you.

You clearly remember tossing yourself onto the couch as soon as you entered your apartment, having been energised from all the drinking and thinking in one night, but when consciousness dawned earlier, you found yourself waking up in your bed and had been neatly tucked under the covers.

Your forehead creases as you think deeply, but your face twists into a grimace when your head throbs again before deciding to cease overanalyzing last night. You shrug your shoulders and close the fridge. Maybe you sleep-walked to your room, which is not surprising considering that last night’s dwelling at the bar was out of your new character as well.

Heaving a sigh, you grab your phone from the kitchen island with the intention to order food after neglecting your grumbling hunger, but the sound of the doorbell chiming sidetracks you. Confusion etches on your face as you make your way to the door, wondering who would pay you a visit at twelve noon.

Definitely not Jennifer, as she would always text you in advance, and definitely not any of your best friends since both are in Seoul, but when you swing the door open, you are proven wrong, standing there with your eyes widened in disbelief at the unexpected yet pleasant surprise.

“Y/N!” Karina heartily greets you, giving you no chance to recover from being greatly stunned by their unanticipated visit in Milan, let alone to be at your apartment, as she lunges for a bear-crushing hug, her arms around you as she squeezes you.

“Girls! What the─” You chuckle in disbelief, your smile stretching wider as Wonyoung joins in the reunion of your much-needed hug from your long-distance best friends. “Not that I’m complaining, but how, why, and what are you doing here? How did you even know my address? I thought you were on your respective business trips.” You inquire, confusion lacing your tone as you recall your conservation last week when you were in a video call with them.

Wonyoung, as elegant as ever, along with her captivating doll-like beauty, beams at you with a smile gracing her cherry-glossed lips. “Well, it’s a lie. Yunjin was the only one who knew about it. Plus, we wanted to surprise you!”

“For your info, she prefers to be called Jennifer now.” You correct her, smiling mirthfully at Wonyoung’s faux annoyance on her countenance.

“Miss Jennifer standing on business as soon as she landed here, huh?” Karina scoffs out playfully before nudging you by the shoulder as the three of you proceed to move further into your apartment. She slings an arm around your shoulder, casting you a grin. “So tell us, what did we miss out on?”

And so you begin to unravel what happened over the course of this week except last night, of course. You don’t want them to worry, and knowing their overprotective nature over you, it is best if some things are kept hidden.

Besides, both of them already have too much on their plates, especially with their respective careers. After graduating with their master’s degrees, they pursued the paths they had created for themselves at the start of university. Wonyoung is now a public relations writer under her grandfather’s company, whereas Karina is a fashion designer under a renowned luxury brand in Seoul.

Having known and seen your best friends thriving in both their lives and careers sends a wave of emotions that render you genuinely proud and elated for them, just as they do to you. No one is happier than your best friends to see the transformative change in you after what happened. To them, you are still the sweet, kind, and compassionate Y/N Kang, but there is a certain ambience of dominance you exude wherever you carry yourself to.

“By the way, we are also here for Milan fashion week.” Karina moves to another topic as the three of you decide to settle by the kitchen island. “Also a surprise since Jen managed to secure invitations for us. You’re coming too, right?” She looks at you with glittering eyes.

“Definitely.” You have long since anticipated attending the famous Milan fashion week, and thanks to Jennifer, you are invited as well as an exclusive VIP guest. The corners of your lips tip up. It is truly a privilege to be associated with someone who has connections to make the nearly impossible happen.

“Where are you girls staying, though?” You inquire, and from the corner of your eyes, you spot Wonyoung ambling towards the living room, probably to admire your apartment, and so you direct your attention to Karina.

“We’re staying at this five-star hotel apartment.” Karina answers, satisfaction emanating from her in the way her face goes animated as she excitedly tells you what has happened. “We’ve only been here for two days, but we can definitely see why you dreamed of travelling to Milan. The food here is amazing, and─”

“Hey, Y/N?” Wonyoung draws your attention, prompting Karina as well to turn around to look at Wonyoung by the living room since the kitchen island is adjacent. “I had no idea you were into flowers.”

“I don’t…” Your utterance wanes as soon as your gaze falls to the bouquet of luscious roses in her grasp, confusion fogging in your head. “Where did you find that?”

“On the coffee table.” Wonyoung’s eyes gleam with fascination as she examines the roses that no doubt are authentic. Even Karina shares the same fascination as Wonyoung, as they immediately gush over how beautiful the roses are. “Judging by the bouquet, it’s obvious that someone must’ve given it to you. So, who is the lucky guy?”

But they are oblivious to the confusion on your countenance that slowly morphs into horror at the vivid recollection of seeing nothing on the coffee table last night before you passed out on the couch. Dread begins to crawl onto your skin, matching the way your stomach churns unpleasantly.

First, it was you waking up in your bed to which you thought you had sleep-walked, then now, the roses that somehow magically appeared on your coffee table? The coincidence is too uncanny, but then the possibility might be true, to which you fear to admit.

No, it can't be that someone has intruded into your apartment when you know it yourself that you had the door locked last night. There was absolutely no way anyone could climb their way up to the highest floor to get to your balcony without falling to their death.

“A friend of mine. Jen’s cousin, actually.” You lie through your teeth steadily, deciding that it’s best if you don’t alarm your best friends. Your eyes narrow at their reactions, already knowing what they are going to say next. “But we aren’t dating or anything like that. Someone gave it to him, and he gave it to me instead since he wasn’t a fan of flowers.”

“Wait, is he the guy we saw once in her background when we were video calling that one time?” Karina’s enthusiastic inquiry is answered by your mere head nod. “Babe, he’s so fucking fine, and I swear he looked straight out of those vogue magazines. You should try dating him.”

“Agreed.” Wonyoung chimes, smiling triumphantly while they remain oblivious to the distress creasing your countenance. “Plus, you’d look good with him.”

A dry chuckle leaves your lips. “Yeah, that’s not happening. He’s a great guy and all, but I’m not interested in him, nor am I interested in dating. I don’t want to risk myself getting another heartbreak after—” 

You bite down your tongue, realising that you are getting too carried away and dwelling over the past once more. Seriously, just what is up with you since last night? You promised yourself that you wouldn’t dwell over your past again.

Upon seeing a certain yet familiar sombre casting shadow over your countenance, Wonyoung and Karina exchange knowing glances before Wonyoung decides to step forth. “We’re sorry. We shouldn’t have brought up anything regarding dating.”

You smile faintly at her, denoting your reassurance. “It’s fine. I know you had good intentions, but I meant what I said. I can’t afford to go through another period of heartbreak.” There is a palpable tremor in your voice that doesn’t go unnoticed by them.

There are a couple beats of silence before Karina initiates, her tone is an unwavering resolve. “You know what would make you feel better? Shopping.”

You chuckle, rolling your eyes playfully. “Please. I’ve had enough of that, thanks to Jen.”

“And I’m not having any of that. You still need to give us a tour around here. Now go on and get changed into something more presentable.” Karina shoots you a coy smile as you reciprocate with a scowl, but nevertheless, you comply.

“Here.” Wonyoung thrusts the bouquet of roses into your hands. “Don’t throw it away. It’s too beautiful to be thrown away. You can place it in a vase or something.”

You sigh softly in response. “Fine. Just wait here and make yourself comfortable like it’s your home.” You tell them before quickly making your way to your room as you grip the bouquet.

You admit that you did have an intention to throw these away, but now that you examine them, these roses indeed look authentically beautiful to be thrown away. Entering your room, you head over to the vanity table while looking down to examine these roses once more.

This time, however, your sharp eyes spot something white hiding amid the roses as you examine closely. Indulging your curiosity, you proceed to grab for it, only for you to hold a mysterious white card.

The rational part of you vehemently urges you to throw away the card while you feel a sense of dread creeping up on you before you slowly open the card to read the messages written on it in black ink.

But as you read it, your hand trembles, which match the way every fibre of your being goes haywire, while you can feel your heart nearly dropping to the pits of your tummy.

No, this can’t be from any of them. Heck, they don’t even know where you are, so it is nearly damn impossible for them to find you here out of all places when you cut off their contacts and bought yourself a new phone.

You quickly put aside the bouquet on the vanity table before attempting to occupy yourself in choosing your outfit of the day in your walk-in wardrobe, but it becomes futile when your mind drifts off to the seemingly harmless message that has an undercurrent danger.

‘You’re still beautiful as ever, sweet angel. Just a little while more.’

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

The weekend passes by quicker than you liked when you spend your time with your best friends, bringing them around to the places that you are familiar with, including your favourite ones, and before you know it, the highly anticipated Milan Fashion Week has arrived.

Eventually, whatever happened back then, in regards to the mysterious roses and the leather jacket that remains in your possession, is overlooked, as you have always been preoccupied focusing on what matters in the present, which is exactly what you needed to retain your sanity.

The moment you step foot into the venue, any remnants of worries dissipate from your mind as your eyes twinkle in fascination at the remarkable fashion appeal of the sophistication encompassing the entire event taking place while there is an elegantly unique ambience teeming in the atmosphere. 

Paparazzis as well as reporters can be spotted with their cameras flashing at the exclusive VIP guests, also known as industry insiders — designers from various fashion houses, buyers, fashion writers and editors, gorgeous models, and even celebrities from other countries. Everywhere your eyes sweep over, it is bustling.

Your gaze finally settles on a familiar brunette with her father, mingling with esteemed guests before you nudge Wonyoung and Karina to follow you. Once you reach the father-daughter duo, their attention is immediately shifted to you with the pleasant smiles on their faces stretched wider.

“Y/N!” Jennifer latches her arms around you, giving you a quick squeeze before moving over to enthusiastically greet Wonyoung and Karina while her father steps in to give you a fatherly embrace that you have grown comfortingly accustomed to.

“Hey, sweetie.” Her father greets you softly as soon as he pulls away, and your heart aches once more at how gentle he is, which reminds you of your father. You brush away the melancholy as you give him a smile. “You look outstanding, and I’m sensing my daughter’s touch on your apparel?”

Honestly, you beg to differ from his compliment, not when other guests dressed up to the nines except you. You didn’t want to potentially draw attention to yourself by dressing up too extravagantly, and so with your adamant insistence, Jennifer demurringly chose for you a gorgeous scarlet satin cami dress that accentuated your contours exquisitely, including the fact that you are practically braless underneath, while the colour matches your tinted lips.

You chuckle lightheartedly at the knowingness in his tone. “Of course. My fashion sense is good, but it can’t be compared to Jen’s.” You say, your eyes drifting to your best friends as they are still conversing rather excitedly, considering that the three of them are fashion enthusiasts.

You, on the other hand, are not as passionate as them, but you desire to experience the world-class fashion week that you often see across social media platforms every year. Plus, you’re experiencing this with your best friends, so this is more than you could’ve asked for.

Soon enough, Jennifer’s father withdraws from your mini group to socialise with other businessmen who are most likely his acquaintances, whereas you and your best friend advance forward to finally meet Eunwoo and Wooseok, both of whom had a pleasant dinner with your group yesterday. To say both of them look more charming than they usually do is an understatement, especially when they often draw attention with ogling eyes from the people in your vicinity.

Amidst the overflowing conversation, you take a moment to observe the exuberance in the glow of their countenance, and warmth tingles in your chest at the amiability they exude as they converse with each other. You are more than glad that the two men, despite them being a little older, seem to get along well with the girls.

After posing for some pictures, thanks to one of the cameramen, your group proceeds to head to the main venue, where the fashion runway show will be starting soon. It isn’t long until you and your group have settled in the venue with you seated in between Eunwoo and Wonyoung in the front row, where you are able to view the models in their sophisticated element as they stride on the runway, displaying such professionalism while adorning with unique yet striking apparel.

You most definitely did not expect to be engrossed by the entire runway show, but there is something about these models and the prowess they wield that bewitched you to the point where you don’t seem to notice Wonyoung and Eunwoo conversing with each other closer behind your back for the male to hear her better amidst the background music.

But then goosebumps begin to arise on your skin before you finally sense something, or rather someone’s eyes burning through you. A frown pulls down at your lips as you briefly look over your shoulder, only to see the other guests are occupied with the ongoing runway models.

Your forehead wrinkles in confusion as you decide to redirect your focus to the front. Maybe you are being paranoid, but the sensation of eyes on your figure is unmistakable, prompting you to examine the seated guests across from you.

Yeah, probably nothing, you think. It’s your mind that decides to— 

You force yourself to swallow the gasp that nearly leaves your mouth, and you swear you can feel your heart stop beating momentarily while the time around you seems to slow down. You truly want to believe that what you are seeing is simply an illusion that your mind conjured, but as your eyes continue to lock with his, there is a palpable electrifying sensation just by the connection between you and him that slowly intensifies, bringing dread to settle over your transfixed figure.

The corner of his lips curves up into a devilish smirk while his eyes darken with a cryptic purpose, and the worst part is, he’s not alone. You lock eyes with the familiar face seated next to him, whose lips mirror his best friend’s devilry. No, you must be seeing things, but as you blink your eyes for another time, you have come to a harrowing realisation that they are very much real.

The other two are not anywhere seated in their vicinity, to which you feel weirded out because even you know it yourself that the four of them come in a package and are practically inseparable despite their differences. Still, it doesn’t allay your incessant worries just because there are only two of them here.

Jay and Sunghoon. Although they are seated a few rows to the back from across yours, you can see how a year has changed them, be it for the better or worse, but probably the latter. They look even more mature than the last time you saw them.

Despite your collected demeanour, you are shaken terribly to the core with questions bombarding your head. You don’t wish to assume anything, and maybe their being here is merely a coincidence and that they were invited as well considering they are Chaebols just like your best friends, but the shadows casting over their countenance tell you otherwise.

If what you are thinking is true, then how did they manage to find you, and why now after a year? Were they the ones who may have potentially intruded your apartment and given you the roses while you were rendered unconscious? 

The way they gaze darkly at you is akin to predators finally catching their prey after the long hunt, with the only exception being that they look ravenous despite their steely, collected demeanour that adds more charms to their distinctive dark allures and visuals.

You refuse to allow their insanely handsome faces to dissuade you from taking a particular course that involves you to elude them at all costs, even when your heart has a fervent throb that feels all too familiar. Longing.

Amidst this unforeseen crisis, you try your utmost to defy against your longing for them, but it is gnawing desperately on the walls you built to protect yourselves from any more disappointments and heartbreak, and you fear to admit that you have indeed missed them, more than you should not have.

Hence, you turn away from their eye contact with a heavy heart, and at the same time, the runway event has officially ended, prompting the VIP guests to mingle around to discuss amiably yet professionally, whereas you find yourself being surrounded by your befriends and trying to keep up with their conversation as well as to go with the flow.

When your eyes shift to where you saw Jay and Sunghoon just moments ago, you find them missing from their spots, as if they were never there in the first place. Nevertheless, you uphold your resolve, and that is to stick close to your best friends, whereas Eunwoo and Wooseok have been whisked away by unfamiliar yet esteemed guests, leaving you with your girls to spend the rest of the day sticking to one another.

Throughout the entire event, as you explore the art exhibitions, pop-up stores, and other luxurious sophistication variety they offer with your best friends, you try your utmost to avoid giving away that you are still shaken up by seeing their faces while your inner turmoil feels endless. Every so often, you would check your surroundings for any sight of them.

Eventually, the night has fallen and the afterparty beckons, to which you wholeheartedly decide to join alongside your best friends and some other guests as you need to let loose the exerting tension in you.

The entire reception is bustling with respective pursuits from the guests, but it is the kind of pursuit where the conversations flow much more colloquially amongst each other while at the same time revelling in the piquant cuisines, various beverages, as well as the music that complements with the classy ambience reverberating throughout the resplendent reception.

Withdrawing from your group, you decide to head over to the beverage section, needing another drink to indulge yourself and invigorating your social battery that is ebbing away. A sigh leaves your lips. At least one thing that remains unchanged is the fact that your social battery is just as weak as it was before unless you ingest alcohol.

As your fingers wrap around the stem of the glass, you raise the glass to your lips and take sips of the champagne. A faint pleasurable hum emits from you as you greedily sips for more, feeling the familiar fizzy sensation within you.

Oblivious to your surroundings, you fail to take heed of the fact that your vulnerability as you stand alone by the beverage section is at anyone’s disposal for whatever intention they have towards you at this very moment.

Just as you place down the empty glass on the table, you feel an ominous presence looming from behind you while the backless of your dress allows you to feel their body heat rather intimately, sending an oddly familiar shudder through your transfixed body. Your breath goes hitched in your throat, feeling their warm breath fanning down on the skin of your exposed shoulder.

“I’m surprised to see you here without your boyfriend.” His voice sounds huskier, laden with desire and an undercurrent of ire, sending a dangerous wave of sensation through you, and yet you can’t help but discern how he sounds more callous than you recall, as though he has been through much.

Right, he is most likely referring to Eunwoo, whom he probably saw how intimately you were dancing with earlier, despite both of you knowing that you don’t see each other that way.

Little did you know that it took every ounce of self-control for him to master upon seeing the way Eunwoo’s hands on your hips as you two swayed to the music, and he wants nothing more than to rip off Eunwoo’s limbs for touching you.

You don’t dare to turn around as he continues to speak slowly just for your ears to hear him. “Don’t tell me that he got bored and ditched you?” His tone drips with piercing mockery that has you clenching your fist. “Cat got your tongue, baby? You know I’m right. He probably can’t fuck you better than I do.”

“You don’t know anything.” You retaliate, your voice sounding foreignly cold in your ears. “For the record, you are not the sex God you think you are. He could probably fuck me better than you ever did.”

You know that you are treading dangerously on the razor-sharp blade with the words you speak so disdainfully and the way his fingers tantalisingly caressing your exposed back speak volumes. “You’re right. I don’t know anything, not since after you left, so shouldn’t you be polite and give me a warm welcome?” He tuts disapprovingly.

“I’m not obliged to do so, especially when you’re nothing but a stranger to me.” You say tersely, hating how your heart aches at the words leaving your mouth so coldly detached, but you don’t want him or any of them to ruin the serenity that has been established in your new life here. You don’t need anymore corruption and toxicity.

Mustering courage, you turn around to face him, your steely eyes meeting his amused yet dangerous ones. You take a brief moment and discreetly examine him up-close, bringing more aches to your heart at how devastatingly handsome he looks than the last time you saw him.

His jet-black hair looks shorter with an undercut, and he has it styled impeccably that displays his chiselled forehead, allowing you to see his vertical left eyebrow piercing that accentuates his sharp steely eyes and the familiar noticeable scar on his bottom lip. His strong cologne infiltrating your senses nearly sends you deflating as you recall all the memories you had with him.

“You’re meaner to me than I was to you before.” He scoffs out, oblivious to the fleeting longing you almost exhibited by the look in your eyes. “You’ve changed, baby. Was it him? Is that why you’re looking at me with such disdain?”

“This isn’t about Eunwoo, and stop calling me baby. You have no right to call me any endearing names, Jay.” You seethe out, gritting your teeth. You hate the flicker of disappointment and hurt in his gaze, but then you recall when you were the one who bore the most wounds in the past. “Like I said, we’re strangers, so I don’t know who you are. If you’ll excuse me, I’m heading back to my friends.”

You don’t give him the opportunity to speak as you brush coldly past him, but just as you do, you fail to realise another figure who has been approaching from behind, causing you to halt in your steps when he latches his hand around your elbow.

You look at him in disbelief as he narrows his eyes at you. “Let go of me, Park Sunghoon.” You utter calmly, trying to tame the storms within you. His touch on your skin feels tingling with familiarity, one that is filled with both ecstasy and longing.

Maybe it’s the aftereffect of your departure from their lives, but you swear Sunghoon looks twice as attractive as you recall. His stark raven bangs fall over his eyebrow, doing nothing to obscure his dark eyes from penetrating into your glaring ones. His grip on your elbow is a silent warning, almost as if telling you to comply with him.

“You don’t want to make a scene in front of these people now, so I suggest you come with us obediently, princess.” His deep voice only seems to intensify the butterflies that awakened against your will, as does the endearment that brings back memories. “Let’s talk like civilised people, yeah?”

“We have nothing to talk about.” Surprisingly, you manage to escape from his grasp, and you quickly put some safe distance between you and him. “If I didn’t reiterate this enough, then let me make it simpler for you to understand. Leave me alone, and don’t you dare do anything to hurt Eunwoo or my friends.”

With one last glare at both of them, you immediately blend through the crowd to return to your friends. You don’t realise that you have been holding back your breath and how tense you look until one of them points out, drawing attention to you.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Jennifer inquires, her eyebrows furrowing with concern as she holds your shoulder. “You don’t look well.”

“I’m fine, but I think I’m going to call it a night.” You give her a small reassuring smile, contrasting how your insides are in a tumult upon your encounter with your past that you thought you had left behind. “Don’t worry about me. I’ll text you once I reach my apartment.”

“I’ll drive you.” Eunwoo offers, earning him an appreciative smile from you before the two of you proceed to bid your goodbyes to your friends.

“You looked pale earlier.” Eunwoo murmurs to you as you walk next to him, making your way to the exit. When his eyes meet yours fleetingly, you recognise the knowingness in them. “What happened?”

“I don’t know what happened and how it happened, Eunwoo.” Your voice sounds dejected despite maintaining your steely demeanour. “But I know for a fact that my past is finally catching up to me.”

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

The journey to your apartment is a silent ride, which you appreciate much since you need silence to ruminate about what still feels surreal to you. You have an inkling that Eunwoo is more than curious to know whatever you meant earlier, as you can see from your peripheral vision how his eyes frequently dart to you, but hesitation holds him back.

Feeling your head pounding, you grimace lightly as you lean your head to the headrest, facing the window. Just as you have every intention to put your fraught nerves to a temporary ease, your sharp eyesight catches a car in the rearview mirror, bringing a frown to your lips.

Initially, you wanted to ignore and dispel any ill-thoughts of the black Ford Mustang that have been driving in the same route as you, but this can’t be a mere coincidence that it is now heading towards the street to your apartment.

You attempt to calm your nerves that are set ablaze once more, not wanting Eunwoo to notice your discomfort. Obviously, when you saw Jay and Sunghoon earlier, they fucked you up in the mind, so it is highly possible that your paranoia right now stems from your previous encounter with them.

“Thank you. I owe you one.” You thank Eunwoo sincerely as soon as you arrive, trying your best to give him a smile while every fibre of your being is urging you to head inside quickly.

Eunwoo casts you a charming grin. “Nah, you don’t owe me anything. We’re friends. By the way, are you sure you don’t need me to accompany you to the lobby?” He asks, his concerned eyes scanning the rather desolate street through the window.

You shake your head at his thoughtful offer and reassure him with a smile. “It’s fine. The street looks creepy at night, but I’m used to it. Thanks again. I’ll see you whenever.” You bid him good night afterwards before exiting from his car.

You watch briefly as Eunwoo speeds off your street before you turn around with the hurried intention to head inside the building, but you stop dead in your tracks when you spot the black Ford Mustang parked by the curb in your street just a few cars down from where you are.

This time, goosebumps arise on your skin, and you have a strong inkling that this is no longer a mere coincidence. Your harrowing interest piques at the moment the both doors of the car push open, prompting you to hold your breath as you await the reveal.

As soon as you manage to catch glimpses of their identity, or more like their identity being obscured with familiar masks, your pulse begins to drum loudly in your ears while your eyes widen in sheer disbelief. Of course, they would follow you all the way here, but you didn’t expect that they really would, as though to chase after you.

Acting upon your fight-or-flight mode, you immediately hasten to head inside the building without looking back. A brief moment of relief washes over you as soon as the elevator opens automatically before you step inside and press the level you intended to go, which is five floors from where your apartment is situated.

You don’t want to take any risk of them finding out which level you live, or maybe they already know since they might also be the ones who gave you those roses. You take this chance to regulate your breathing, physically and mentally preparing yourself for the incoming exertion as you lean your back against the wall. 

Once the elevator chimes as it opens, you walk briskly as you make your way to the door, where the long flight of stairs is by the end of the corridor. You push the door open and waste no time in ascending the stairs. The sound of a door slamming loudly close from below triggers you as it intensifies your perturbation that has your chest tightening.

A growing sense of dread settles over you, bringing forth anxiety that surges through you as it manifests itself in the irregular rise and fall of your chest, while the gradual return of your headache causes an incessant rhythmic pulsating that parallels your pumping heart, nearly impeding you from the pursuit to your newfound sanctuary as you clutch onto the metal railing.

You feel the burning aches in your calves’ muscles as well as your feet, which are adorned in 3-inch stiletto heels, beseeching you for a moment of respite. You come to an abrupt halt just as you finally reach the last flight of stairs, wanting to catch your breath and trying your utmost to silence yourself from making any noise.

It is times like this where you finally question yourself: why on earth did you choose to live at the highest level in the first place?

But then again, you never had anticipated for anything like this to happen. No, you never would have thought that you would be running for your life out of fear again, not since after you departed from your old life and buried the horrible memories where they would never resurface in your mind again.

Despite the persisting fear that grips you, a rousing anger is palpable in you as a muscle pulses in your jaw while your eyes go hardened at the evocative paranoia you thought you had effaced in your mind. Yeah, maybe you are being paranoid. Maybe the car you saw back there was a completely different one than the one following you. Maybe your mind decides to fuck you up again after so long.

Or maybe the influence of alcohol is affecting your sanity, evoking such apprehension that strikes you as paranoid, but if it is, then the reverberating footsteps from below you as they ascend the flights of stairs should not have alarmed you when they probably belong to other residents that live in the same apartment building as you.

You refuse to look down and check their identity, fearing that they would turn out to be the ones you thought you had escaped from. Rallying your erratic nerves, the door just a few metres ahead of you is a beckoning to your pursuit as you set in motion once more, running even when you are still in heels. You push the door open haphazardly, hastening as your feet instinctively guide you to your apartment door by mere muscle memory.

Once you finally reach, you rummage through your purse before grabbing for your key card, but with your trembling fingers, you fumble with it as you attempt to tap your card onto the smart lock. You don’t look back, even when the sound of the exit door where you emerged from is being opened.

As the door chimes familiarly, you expeditiously open the door and shove yourself into your not-so-humble abode before closing the door behind you securely. You dismiss the sound of discernible footsteps from the outside of the door along the corridor, now feeling safe and sound, with a sigh of relief leaving your lips.

Having grown accustomed to the darkness enshrouding your apartment, you resort to normalcy while your rapid heart rate begins to decelerate as you busily store your platform heels in the shoe compartment and place your hand purse on the entryway table before advancing further into your sanctuary.

However, your steps seem to slow down while your stomach begins to churn unpleasantly as you heed to your instinct that vividly senses the eccentric, foreboding atmosphere. Thanks to the broad windows that allow the vibrant cityscape to illuminate your apartment, albeit dim, your eyes adjust to the surroundings as you survey for anything out of the ordinary.

The thought of an intruder in your apartment is simply preposterous when you know it yourself that you had both the door and balcony locked hours ago. Surely, this is your paranoid mind conjuring another ghastly thought that doesn’t help with your perturbation.

But when your gaze finally settles on a manly silhouette against the vibrant cityscape, maybe you were not being so paranoid after all. Still, despite the violent churns in your tummy, you intend to take feeble steps to get a better look at the intruder while your rationality beseeches you to grab something or do anything to defend yourself against the brooding danger.

The intruder is obviously a male, judging by his physique even when he seems to be clad in an all-black ensemble, and from his laid-back stance, he is leaning behind against the balustrade by the balcony with his arms crossed over his chest.

Not even two steps when the intruder decides to intervene as he leans away from the balustrade and saunters forward, allowing you the stark view of his veiled identity beneath the eerily familiar mask he adorns, to which your eyes widen in both sheer disbelief and alarmed. You’d recognise that red mask anywhere.

Your figure is transfixed on the spot while every fibre in your being is screaming at you to elude him, but it is as though his gaze behind the mask penetrates you, and even in the way he is deliberately stalking towards you. You ignore the way he tilts his head to one side that seems adorable.

“Missed me, my love?” His familiar voice sends you a jarring sensation that has your heart lurching in your chest. The pitch of his voice sounds deeper than the last time you heard him, and a sultry rasp is evident that is accompanied by a brewing ire, especially in the way he exudes such disconcerting danger.

You should be matching his ire, and maybe even greater than his since he intruded into your once-tranquil sanctuary, but it is completely absurd how, in the midst of this, you feel a palpable arousing desire that you haven’t felt so profound in a long time. 

This time, you know that it’s the influence of alcohol again. Oh, it is truly sickening, and you feel revolted at yourself, but maybe the wickedness in you has long since desired to be hunted and preyed on once more.

You open your mouth to speak, but it is as though you lost the ability to speak, unable to articulate your thoughts and feelings that are parallel in a torrent. It seems that he doesn’t feel satisfied with your lack of response as you finally take steps back, mapping the ways to elude him.

“I asked you a question, sweetheart.” He nearly growls out, and amidst the fear, your arousal seems to intensify. “Did you not miss me at all? Because I did, and I’ve missed you so dearly. How dare you leave me, my love?”

Instead of answering, you pivot on your heels and bolt for the main door, acting on your instinct, but the second you swing the door open, a startled yet frightful shriek leaves your lips when you come face-to-face with two ominous figures who adorn in familiar yet distinctive masks you dreadfully recognise.

“Where do you think you’re going, princess?” Even his voice behind that silver mask sounds deeper than you recall, and it is as though they’ve been through so much that accentuates in the way they sound and speak.

“Baby girl loves getting chased and tests our patience, like she usually did before.” His chuckles sound cold and harsh behind his black mask as he saunters towards you while you have long since backed away from your old predators, your mind mapping other ways to elude them. “It’s been long overdue, yeah? Let’s have a talk.”

You scoff, mustering the courage to display your long-established steely demeanour. “Oh, yeah. Let’s have a talk once I put all of you behind bars for your intrusion on my property.” Your aggressive retaliation takes them by little surprise, considering that they have been observing you as well as noticing the palpable change in you.

“Princess has gotten feistier.” He chuckles, but even you can discern how his patience is running thin in the way he sounds. He takes you by surprise as he takes a long stride forward in an attempt to reach for you, nearly growling out, “Come here.”

Of course, with your newfound vitality that incites from the adrenaline rush through you, now dashing for your room, completely determined to elude them despite the palpable yearning in your heart that adamantly desires to return to them.

Pushing open the door to your room, you shove yourself inside while your breathing is ragged from all the running ever since. Just before you can lock the door, a shriek leaves your lips when another intruding yet imposing figure towers over you, adorned in a familiar white mask.

You don’t even have the opportunity to recover when he seizes you in his possession, manoeuvring you and pinning you against the wall next to the door. His palm covers your mouth before you can scream, while the other seizes your bound wrists above your head.

“It’s been a long time, my beloved. Oh, how I’ve missed you so fucking much.” He lulls dangerously, tightening his grip on you while your pupils shake in fear as you stare at him with widened eyes, heeding to the ire that belies his longing. “Did you like the roses we bought for you?”

So it was from them. Even though you did like them, you refuse to admit it. You shake your head vehemently in response, earning you a disapproving tut from him. Your heart pumps harder as he closes the proximity between you two, his body heat is now in contact with yours.

“Liar. If you didn’t like them, you would’ve thrown them away, but you kept them instead.” He slowly removes his palm from your mouth, allowing you more capacity to regulate your harsh breathing. “Tell me that you’ve missed us, that you’ve missed me.”

You bite down your tongue, almost letting your true feelings that you thought you had them obliterated. Mustering the iciest glare you can, you penetrate your eyes into the eye sockets of his mask as you harshly utter, “I didn’t. Not one bit. Now leave, Heeseung─”

In a blink of an eye, Heeseung manoeuvres you again, and this time, you find yourself face-landing on the bed. You hear the door open, causing you to scramble on the bed as you finally gain a better view of your now-four predators encompassing your room, hindering you from any form of escape.

Their imposing figures that mingle with the thickening tension in the air suffocate you, and yet you can’t seem to stop your arousal from leaking from your throbbing clothed cunt. The hem of your dress hikes up way above your thighs as you attempt to crawl backwards, but a yelp emits from you when Heeseung grabs you by the ankles and pulls you towards them.

“We were going to play nice with you, but then you just had to be adorable and make things harder for us.” Heeseung’s voice holds dark promises that send you the pleasurable shivers, causing you to discreetly push your legs together in an attempt to stop the arousal, but it is futile.

“Bratty Princess needs to be taught a lesson.” Sunghoon drawls, and this time, your wrath is wholly eclipsed by the avid lust surging through you as you recall the last time you ever defied them.

Despite your steely, scowling demeanour, your heart races in anticipation, and your mind is dizzying from both the alcohol and the incessant need for them to reciprocate your darkest temptation. You squirm lightly under their penetrating gazes behind their masks that ooze with the familiar dark allure which the devilry in you desires most.

Oh, fuck, maybe you did miss them and their cocks.

Still, displaying your defiance towards them sounds as ever thrilling, and just for tonight, you decide to push aside whatever hurt and yearning in you that were caused by them. Tonight, you need to satiate your feverish lust that has long been neglected.

“What do you say, baby girl? Do you still want to play this the hard way, or do you want to talk?” Jay asks, the mockery dripping from his deep voice matches his imposing mask.

Of course, the answer is more than obvious to you. Supporting your upraised body with your elbows on the dipping mattress, a cold smirk plays on your lips while your sultry gaze is a silent yet powering invitation to them, as does your stark, revealing legs.

“You guys reek of desperation.” You scoff, still smirking, while you feign disgust with your eyes that do nothing to dispel the thickening heat in the air. “Seriously, fuck off─”

“So the hard way it is, then.” Heeseung deprives any more provocation from you as he hauls you up by the arm, nearly has you tumbling forward, but he steadies you as he cups your cheeks, forcing you to look into the dark, hollow sockets with widened eyes while you feel arousefully shaken by the depraved mockery by his mask’s visage alone. “Let’s make it a little fun, shall we? You’re going to try to escape from us, but if we catch you, we fuck you.”

With the persisting adrenaline rush in you, of course you are more than glad that things are now exciting in the most depraved way, but you refuse to give away your cooperation. After all, you had missed being a brat.

“No, fuck you! I’m going to report you for your intrusion.” You vehemently emphasise, and for a moment, you nearly deflate when your eyes flicker down at the necklace around his neck with a familiar ring resting on his chest, causing your heart to squeeze, but you quickly compose yourself before shoving him away from you with your every strength. “See your asses in jail.” You manage to splutter before bolting for the door and swinging it open.

It is odd how you hear none of their footsteps behind you when you expect them to chase after you. Nevertheless, you hasten forward, now heading for the door that grants you the freedom you feign seeking, but your rationality is beseeching you to actually escape.

As soon as you reach, your hand latches on the handle to push down and open, but it won’t budge at all. Huffing, you try for another time, only to receive an automated beeping sound from the smart padlock, bringing dread to you. You are locked from the inside out, and you have no idea how when this has never happened.

“My sweetheart can’t open the door?” Jake’s voice is laced with mockery, prompting you to turn around to see him leaning sideways against the wall of the end of the entryway with one hand tucked inside his pocket while the other holding his phone, to which your eyes narrow. Your suspicion is correct when he is the one responsible and manipulates your chance at escape. “I did a little modification on your smart padlock. Hope you don’t mind, lovely.”

Cursing under your breath, you resort to another plan, which is none, but you make a run from your predator anyway. You find yourself in the kitchen, which you actually never planned to, but just when you’re about to make an exit, a small shriek leaves your lips when Jake appears by the entrance of the kitchen, prompting you to back away.

“Do you know how adorable you look like this? Running away from me.” You ignore the fact that Jake’s breathy chuckles resurrect the butterflies in your tummy, your eyes darting to your surroundings while he continues to revel in the way you look so frantic. “Come on, now, sweetheart. Just surrender yourself to me, and we’ll make you feel good all night long.”

When your eyes settle on the kitchen knife, you grab it on instinct and just on time as he swiftly moves closer to you, feeling his body heat oozing to yours. With a cold snarl, you deftly manipulate your moves on him, now finding himself being pinned against the wall by you with your arm pressing on his chest while the other positions the sharp blade to his neck.

“Wow, sweetheart. I always knew you had it in you.” Jake chuckles again, completely undaunted by the fact that you are holding him dangerously at a knifepoint. “That’s why we’re the perfect match. How truly adorable you are, my dearest.”

“Stop talking and undo what you did to my door.” You coldly snarl at him, your eyes glaring heated into the hollow sockets of his mask. Honestly, you don’t have any malicious intent to harm, only wanting to give him a good scare, or at least you attempt to.

“This brings back memories, don’t you think?” Jake simply ignores your demand, his smirk widening behind the mask as he revels in the way you look attractively brazen with a lethal weapon in your grasp. “It would’ve been more perfect if you wore a ghostface mask. You’d look so fucking good─Fuck” He groans, a sensual growl evident in the rumble of his chest when you intentionally press your thigh against his prominent bulge.

You scoff in disbelief while the corner of your lips twitches to a smirk that you hold back, revelling in the dominance you assert over him. “Are you seriously getting hard over this? You like it when I hold the knife to your neck, knowing that I could easily end you?”

“Fuck yeah.” Jake gasps lightly as he leans his head back against the wall, baring his exposed neck to you with his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down while he slowly grinds his bulge against your thigh, nearly whimpering out. “Please, sweetheart.”

“What are you pleading for? For me to cut your throat slowly while I fuck you?” Mockery drips your tone as he continues to grind on you. A part of you feels wickedly delighted that Jake is at your mercy, especially as he is evidently turned on by your derogatory remarks. “You like the idea, don’t you? Fucking nasty.”

“At least I’ll bleed to death happily with your pussy wrapped around my cock.” Jake chuckles breathily, his lips curving into a smirk at the deleterious yet salacious thought while his mind conjures up the erotic image that goes straight into his borderline-painful erection. 

“You really are pathetic and a psycho, do you know that?” You hiss, pressing the sharp blade into his skin, but careful enough not to tear it. “Even in the face of death, sex is all you can think about.”

“When it comes to you, then yeah. I’m only ever hard for you.” He rasps, his voice sounding deeper while you discern a certain yet palpable shift in the air. Your eyebrows furrow slightly when he halts grinding, followed by a sigh. “Alright, sweetheart, playtime’s over. It’s my turn now.”

Your face contorts into confusion while you unintentionally loosen your grip on the knife. “What─” A startled gasp leaves your lips as soon as he deftly does an uno reverse on the situation, now seizing control over you that prompts him to possess the knife while backing you up swiftly until you hit the countertop behind you.

Your breath hitches in your throat as you feel the sharp blade on the skin of your neck, prompting you to tilt your head up to look at him while your heart pounds harder against your chest. Rather than the expectant fear, the position only intensifies your arousal coupled with the fogging lust in your head.

“What are you waiting for? Do it.” You jab him with provocation, your eyes glinting with challenge as you dare him to tear your skin. He remains silent, but the knife remains on your neck. You decide to provoke him again, leaning your neck to press against the blade while a smirk smears across your lips. “Don’t deny it. Deep down, you know you’ve always wanted to. From that moment you chased after me and fucked me as ghostface.”

“You know me so well, lovely.” Jake hums as he drags the pointed tip down your skin tantalisingly slowly with purpose. You shudder lightly as the tip ghosts across the expanse of your exposed chest. “But as much as I’d love to see you bleed prettily for me, I don’t want your precious skin to scar other than my mark. Now remove your underwear, and don’t make me repeat it.”

Surprisingly, you comply, trying your utmost not to seem eager while he takes one step away to allow you space to remove your underwear before you let it drop to the floor.

“Sit on the counter.” Jake orders sternly again, and heeding obedience, your palms plant on the countertop to assist in pulling up your body weight. “Now spread your legs, baby.”

You bite down your lip as you slowly spread your legs apart while the hem of your dress bunches up, only to be taken by surprise when he stands in between your legs with his thumb stroking along your slick folds until he reaches your clit to rub lazy circles, eliciting a gasp from you.

“It looks like I’m not the only one getting turned on by this.” Jake scoffs lightly, his thumb doesn’t relent from rubbing your clit, stimulating the bundle of nerves while a breathy moan escapes you. “Let’s take a trip down memory lane, shall we?”

“Jaeyun.” A startled gasp leaves your lips while your heart nearly lurches in your chest when he presses the edge of the knife’s handle on your clit that throbs from the solid sensation. He slides down the handle along your slick folds before taking you by surprise when he slowly pushes the handle into your cunt. “J-Jaeyun!” Your hand latches on his shoulder as you feel a spark of fear within you.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart? You weren’t so afraid earlier.” Jake teases you, but when his eyes flicker to yours, he halts his movement, with nearly half of the handle disappearing into your wet heat. He cups your cheek with his other palm, using his thumb to gently stroke your skin. “Relax, sweetheart. Don’t tense up. I won’t hurt you, you know that.”

Your heart melts upon hearing his gentle assurance, and you can’t resist falling for his charms as you place your hand on top of his, your eyes staring into the hollow sockets of his mask as you give him a nod that denotes a green light, to which he resumes his ministrations.

“Jae.” You moan, surrendering yourself to the sensation of your cunt being assaulted by the knife handle as you prompt your legs to spread wider for him, displaying your avidity in his hungry eyes as he watches how you’re taking it.

“That’s it, my girl. You’re doing so good.” Jake whispers amourously, bringing his two fingers to your mouth, to which you understand his intent as you open your mouth to stick your tongue out for him to collect your saliva before his slick fingers make their descent to your clit to rub it with skillful precision that has your cunt clenches around the handle. “Feels good?”

“So, so good.” You moan out your response, your hooded eyes fluttering open and close as you tilt your head up while moving your hips in tandem with the handle being thrust into your nearly weeping cunt.

Unbeknownst to you, another masked predator has been watching since the moment Jake fucked you with the knife handle, leaning sideways against the entryway of the kitchen with his arms folded. Behind the mask he adorned, his eyes darken as he drinks in the erotic display of you getting lost in the euphoria with your legs spread wide and your back arched that causes your erected nipples to be visible against the material of your dress.

Feeling a presence from behind him, Jake casts a brief glance over his shoulder to see his best friend without stopping the momentum. A smirk touches his lips, knowing that his best friend desires you vehemently.

“What are you standing there for?” Jake’s question draws your focus, and when you do, your eyes latch on the familiar silver mask as he stands across from you. Your cheeks go warm at the fact that Sunghoon has been watching you being shamelessly fucked by a mere knife handle. “You’re welcome to join. I’m sure our girl would love a set of fingers to stretch her.”

“Didn’t know princess was into this kind of stuff.” Sunghoon drawls as he saunters forward while you only feel a wave of anticipation for another to ruin you. “Like Jake said, I’m gonna stretch you good for you to take us later.”

A whimper leaves your lips as you feel the loss of the knife handle, causing your cunt to clench at the emptiness, but a gasp tears from your throat at the abrupt intrusion of Sunghoon’s cold, slender fingers plunging into you, replacing what was deprived of you.

“Hoon!” You moan loudly as his fingers thrust into you vigorously, yet it is a familiar momentum you had missed, prompting you to latch your hands onto his broad shoulders with your nails sinking into the material of his jacket.

“You’re soaking wet, princess.” Sunghoon grunts, increasing his pace as he fucks you with his fingers, eliciting a lewd sound from the slicks of your cunt that denotes your arousal. “So tight too. Should’ve fucked you sooner. How are you going to take us?”

But his remarks are drowned out by the sound of your moans that serenade to them, rendering them impatient as their erection is raging beneath the slacks. 

“Sweetheart is dripping.” Jake coos, joining Sunghoon as he decides to set the bundle of nerves aflame with his thumb rubbing your clit. The dual sensation from the two best friends sends you to the teetering edge of ecstasy.

“Fuck. Hoonie! Jae!” You whine, planting your palms beside you on the countertop as you move your hips sensually yet at the same tandem as their fingers. You can feel yourself on the brink of the need to release, your body tauts with tension alongside the knot coiling in your tummy, getting ready to hurtle yourself to the climax.

“I’m going to cum!” Just as you announce, they cruelly deprive you of the orgasm that is slowly ebbing away as they pull away from your throbbing cunt, eliciting a sob from you while tears prickle in your eyes.

“You didn’t think that we’d give you to cum so easily after abandoning us, did you?” Sunghoon scoffs, leaning forward to cradle your face to wipe a single tear running down your cheek. His palm rubs your thigh soothingly before grabbing it. “Wrap your legs around me, princess.” He murmurs, and you do so obediently with your arms hooking around his neck on instinct.

Sunghoon proceeds to carry you back to your room with his hands supporting your buttocks. You indulge your body that has been craving this intimacy with him as you hug him tighter and bury your face in the junction of his shoulder and neck. His familiar cologne is a soothing balm to your nerves.

As soon as Sunghoon enters your room, he sets you down on the bed, prompting you to unwrap yourself from him. With the streaks of moonlight filtering into your window, your eyes spot the shade of Heeseung’s hair that looks lighter, unlike his best friends.

Your attention is pulled by Sunghoon as you look at his imposing figure looming over yours by the edge of the bed. “Strip for us, princess.”

Overcome by a surge of defiance, you scoff, rolling your eyes at him as you remain unmoving from the bed. “No.”

“I said fucking strip. Don’t make me repeat it for another time unless you want a good spanking.” Sunghoon's assertive dominance sends an intoxicating wave to you that nearly suffocates you.

Feigning reluctance, you huff lightly, your fingers curling at the hem of your dress that is bunched up to your hips before you pull it up purposefully slowly, as though to taunt them. All the while, their eyes are in a hypnotic trance at every perfect contour of your nudity despite the lack of light in the room, feeling borderline ravenous as you finally toss aside your dress without breaking eye contact with them.

Then palpable tension in the air feels electrifying that mingles with your anticipation, garnering their attention to your spellbinding lascivious gaze that melds with the hatred while your futile effort to discreetly squeeze your thighs together to repress the incessant arousal in your wet core amuses them.

“Tie her.” Heeseung’s command staggers you, and every bit of your provocation towards them dissipates.

“Wait, what?” But your reaction delays as Sunghoon hovers on top of you, catching you off guard when he curls his fingers around your neck to pin you firmly to the mattress. “Sunghoon!” You gasp in disbelief, your hands latching on his arm to claw at him, but Jay manages to seize them and locks them in place above your head, only for you to feel him tying your wrists together.

As you continue to squirm underneath them with strings of curses leaving your lips, Sunghoon asserts his dominance again to tame you, his fingers around your neck tightening that elicits a strangled gasp from you, prompting you to look at him with widened eyes.

“Behave, princess.” Sunghoon nearly growls out, but instead of intimidation, you feel sensually aroused by his familiar rough treatment. “You’re already in deep trouble for daring to abandon us for a whole damn year.”

You don’t make any retort, having a keen sense that what you did have aggrieved them, and now what’s awaiting you is their depravity that is practically ravenous to devour you in any moment from now.

“What, no comebacks now?” Sunghoon asks mockingly, tilting his head in amused curiosity, whereas you merely glare at him despite his mask feeling imposing on your vulnerable figure, as do his fingers around your neck. “What happened to the bratty princess with a foul mouth?”

Before you can even retaliate, Jay’s voice cuts through the air. “Hoon, move.” He commands coldly, and Sunghoon reluctantly gets off from you, now leaving you entirely exposed under their ravenous gaze with your stark nudity on display.

“Care to tell us what’s this?” Jay inquires as he raises an alarmingly familiar pink equipment, or rather, rose vibrator, in his grasp, causing your cheeks to feel warmer in utter embarrassment.

“You snooped around my room!” You decide to mask your embarrassment by the sheer anger in your voice. “God! Don’t any of you have any decorum?!”

“Says the girl who owns a vibrator.” Jay retorts calmly, and you can sense the annoying smirk on his charming face. “So you didn’t manage to find anyone to fuck you good throughout the year, baby?”

You ignore the endearment again, scoffing. “I have needs, just like you guys do when you beat your meat, and who says I didn’t manage to find someone?”

It looks like none of them is obviously appreciative of your statement, even though you are merely taunting them, as evident in the way the tension becomes unbearably hot. The next thing you know, Jay brings down the functioning vibrator to your clit, sending you jolting shockwaves of pleasurable sensation through your body.

“Ungh! Fuck!” You moan loudly, your eyes rolling to the back with your neck arching, and your legs threatening to close due to the overpowering sensation from the vibrator as he set it on the highest level, but Jake and Sunghoon pin your legs on each side, preventing them from closing. “Please! It’s too much!”

“Too much? I recall a certain slutty princess wanting to cum earlier.” Sunghoon smirks, revelling in the way you are borderline ruined just by your own vibrator, to which Jay presses deeply onto your clit that is going ablaze. “So you’re going to cum for as many times as we want you too.”

It feels tortuous despite the persisting pleasure that derives from your clit area, which is nearly sensitive. With your binded wrists, you can only afford to squirm under their hold. A series of moans and cries leave your lips while your hips move with little resistance in an attempt to feel the vibrator deeply.

It isn’t long until you can feel it as your impending orgasm that is teetering at the precipice finally crashes down like tidal waves, releasing fluids as they gush out from your pulsating cunt that is ready to be stuffed full by their cocks.

“So fucking messy,” Jay tuts, deciding to show you a little mercy as he removes the vibrator from your now-sensitive clit, but he lands a slap on your slick folds before repeating for a few times, causing your hips to jolt up involuntarily at the impact. “And that’s only the first orgasm.”

As soon as Jake and Sunghoon unpin your legs, you close them instinctively and turn to one side as you bring your tied wrists to your chest, your mind fuzzing from the aftermath of that intense orgasm. You hear shuffles from them, probably clothes discarding, and the next thing you know, hands seize your legs to pull you down towards them, eliciting a yelp from you before they haul you up.

Your heart flutters at the close proximity between you and Jay as he holds you close to him, his fingers caressing your cheek tenderly feels deceptive, but nevertheless, you savour whatever bits of affection he gives before you feel a hand tugging you and beckoning you to him.

“Come here, sweetheart.” Jake’s voice sounds huskier than usual as he pulls you down with him, settling you on top of him and aiming his erection towards your cunt before he forces you to sink down on him.

Since it has been a year since you had proper sex, your cunt is forced to get accustomed to the sheer girth of his cock, your walls welcoming him tight while you moan brokenly by the remnants of resistance.

“Jaeyun.” You whimper as he grips your hips to move you in a bouncing motion for good measure before his arms envelope your body to pull you down with him as he lays on his back. You whine, imploring him to resume his thrust, but he remains unmoving until you feel another presence looming over your docile figure with his hand spreading your supple butt.

You nearly jolt at the abrupt sensation of the heavy girth of his cock smacking your ass repeatedly. “We’re going to fuck your holes at the same time, baby.” Jay says, his tone sounding smug, whereas you begin to panic as you recall the blistering pain the last time they fucked you in the ass.

“W-Wait! I don’t know if it’ll fit!” But your protest goes unheard as Jay slides his cock into your tight hole, tearing a broken gasp from you at the familiar sensation. Both Jy and Jake waste no time in thrusting their cocks into your holes, setting a pace that sends you reeling in both pain and pleasure that slowly surges through your body.

“Fuck, baby.” Jay groans, his head tilting up as he stands by the edge of the bed while gripping your hips for leverage, working in tandem with Jake with the sound of your skins slapping against each other due to the borderline vigorous pace they set in motion.

“Sweetheart’s still so tight even after all this while.” Jake rasps, lifting his head to press a kiss on your shoulder with his masked lips while he holds you by the plumpness of your butt cheeks as he thrusts into you. “Don’t worry. We’re always going to keep you full with our cocks.”

“That’s fucking right.” Jay grunts from behind you, delivering a brutal yet deliberate thrust that has your body jolting forward and staying completely still as he buries his cock deeply and dumps his cum into your anal. “You’re not going to leave us like that again.”

Their promises go unheard by you as you are too caught up in the delirium. “P-Please, more!” You plead in a sob, desperately moving your hips to meet Jake’s thrust while Jay remains buried in your anal.

“Greedy baby.” Jay coos, brushing your hair away from sticking to your face before tangling his fingers in your hair to grab it in a makeshift ponytail as you are forced to form an arched body. “Baby girl wants more, so fuck her harder, Jake.”

Jake complies, increasing the pace that elicits lewd sounds from your slicks of arousal. His once slow, deliberate thrust changes into one that has your eyes going white and mouth parted open with silent moans.

With Jake’s loose arms falling from your body, Jay grasps the opportunity to haul your body up before he deftly binds your arms together with the tie from behind you while Jake remains seizing control over your hips to meet his thrust, causing you to bounce on his cock.

“Jay.” You moan out as Jay amplifies your heightened pleasure with his fingers tweaking and pinching your sensitive nipples, occasionally palming your tits. With Jake’s thrust going relentlessly frenzied, your climax looming with an intensity that feels familiar, causing your cunt to clench and unclench around him.

“I’m going to cum inside you, sweetheart. Fill you full of my babies.” Jake’s voice is laden with lust and a hint of longing, while the pitch of your moans goes higher as he fucks you harder. “Yeah, you’d like that, don’t you? Our babies will look so beautiful.”

With one last thrust, you tumble over the edge of ecstasy with white-hot pleasure surges through you as you cream all over his now-lathered cock while he buries himself to the hilt, filling your womb with his babies just as he promised.

A weak moan leaves your lips, feeling the tantalising drag of Jake’s cock along your white-painted walls as Jay slowly lifts you up from him before he settles you on the bed, facing the ceiling. Your eyelids feel heavier as you grapple to bask in the aftermath of your second orgasm of the night.

But of course, your masked predators never finish with you. “Don’t lose yourself to sleep now, princess. We haven’t had our turns yet.” Sunghoon’s cocky voice diminishes the slumber that beckons you. “You haven’t even had your punishment yet.”

As soon as those words leave his lips, a painful smack on your smeared-cum folds causes you to jolt from the impact, eliciting more sobs from you as Sunghoon and Heeseung work in tandem to deliver your punishment. One slapping your nearly-reddened cunt while the other rubbing your sensitive clit with torturous precision.

“You dared to leave us when you promised to stay by our side.” Heeseung’s deep, sombre voice that carries an undercurrent of laden lust overpowers the sound of your sobs and moans, aligning the way he delivers wet slaps to your cunt. “A year without you─ Fuck,” He lands another slap that punctuates his deep ire while tears stream down your cheeks. “You were so cruel to abandon us, beloved.”

Your heart clenches at the noticeable crack in his tone. This time, you release a raw sob that unveils your poignancy, which you have kept hidden with other sentiments you repressed yourself for a year. But you remain silent, refusing to apologise when you know you did what you had to, despite the regret.

After what it feels like forever, your punishment ends with Heeseung soothing your abused folds with the gentle padding of his fingers while your breaths become laboured from the crying. You thought they would be gentle with you after the intense punishment, but Sunghoon proves you wrong when he hovers on top of you and slaps down his weighty cock on your wet folds before plunging into your cunt with one swift thrust.

“Hoon!” You gasp out, his hips pistoning harder and faster as he fucks into you with reckless abandon. Just like that, your arousal returns to your heated core. Your glazed eyes stare at him, hating how you can’t see the contortion in his charming face and his upper body still clad with the layers of his clothes, just like the others.

“Wrap your legs around me, princess.” Sunghoon grunts, halting his thrust while you take this signal to wrap your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck before he carefully carries you. As he holds you in the air, you try your utmost not to bounce on his cock, even though you are tempted too.

“We’re going to fuck your sweet cunt at the same time, princess.” Sunghoon tells you as he slowly settles you back on the bed, only for you to feel a warm body in contact with you from behind. “Fuck you full however long we want to.”

Your moans go straight to Jay and Jake’s twitching cocks as they watch you in fascination, their eyes transfixing on your pussy that is welcoming Heeseung while Sunghoon remains buried in you.

“Hee, Hoonie.” You whimper, needing them to fuck you into oblivion. “More, harder.” It is as though coherency leaves you from the moment they start to thrust into you potently, working well in tandem with one push and the other pulls before they exchange and repeat the motion.

“You were made for this, princess. Made to take our cocks.” Sunghoon growls, sending shivers down your spine while you feel helpless with tied arms behind you pressing against Heeseung’s stomach. “Everything about you is made for us.”

“Yes.” You moan out, your walls clenching around them elicits collective groans and moans from them before their thrusts become more fervent and punishing, bullying their cocks into your abused cunt, and yet you feel such longing in the way they hold you close.

“Never going to let you slip from my fingers again.” Heeseung says in between bated breaths next to your ear, his fingers descending to rub your clit and adding more to your building pleasure. “Gonna breed you until we’re satisfied.”

“Fucking breed you so you can’t escape from us.” Sunghoon mutters harshly, using his other hand to grab you by the neck, enough to apply pressure that accentuates his promises. “If you think you can run away with our babies in you, then you have another thing coming, princess.”

You moan weakly in response, focusing on the white-hot pleasure surges through your body while your impending climax is teetering once more. You can feel their cocks swelling in you, amplifying your overall pleasure.

“Yeah, baby, cum for us.” On Heeseung’s command, your cunt releases the gush of fluids as you squirt messily everywhere, causing your beeding to be completely drenched, with their cocks still thrusting into you while your body convulses between them.

“We got you, my love.” Heeseung’s voice is a velvet stroke in your ear, calming you down from your high that is accompanied by his hand stroking your bulging abdomen from their girth, their thrust unrelenting.

“Give us one more, princess. You can do it.” Sunghoon’s tone is akin to Heeseung, albeit stern but with a tinge of palpable gentleness that has you mewling, feeling moved by their words that have reignited your arousal tenfold and caused you to arch into their scorching touch while your cunt pulsates with each precise thrust that hurls you into a new height of ecstasy.

Getting lost in the heady mix of lust, moans, and sweats amidst your entwined body, you can feel your pleasure building to an unbearable crescendo that mingles with theirs, eliciting moans and grunts from the three of you, and the sensation getting more intense.

Finally, the knot in your tummy snaps as you surrender yourself to the pull of ecstasy, fluids gushing out for the third time as you squirt uncontrollably for them before they follow suit with primal roars as they bury their cocks to the hilt of your womb, keeping their words true as they seal you with their fate for the better or worse.

Following the aftermath of your fiery yet passionate encounter, you go slump on top of Heeseung while Sunghoon slowly withdraws his cock from your spent cunt with a sigh. After contemplating, Heeseung removes himself from you, eliciting a whimper from you at the sheer sensitivity.

You flutter your eyes close, resting momentarily while you slowly wrap your head around about what the fuck happened in just one night, and the night isn’t even over, especially for you. You feel full with their cum they had fiercely dumped into your womb, causing it to leak from your gaping cunt. You feel hands untying your restraint from behind, granting your aching arms the freedom they were deprived of as you rub them with a wince, leaving your lips.

When your eyes flicker to your masked men who are surrounding the bed, tension eventually brews, bringing the familiar wave of heat to you as you notice the way they seem to be focused on your cum-smeared cunt leaking down.

“Fuck me again, please.” You blurt out in a plea before you can stop yourself. With your hooded lustful eyes, you gaze at them sensually as you bite down your lip, your fingers finding their way to your cunt before you rub your sticky clit, enticing them in the way you arch in your own touch with your legs spread lewdly. “I want you. All of you.”

“You heard our girl. She wants all of us.” Heeseung tells his best friends, a soft smirk unfurling on his lips as he looks at them. “Let’s give her what she wants, and maybe even more.”

Things escalated more heatedly from that moment forth, your heightened libido matching theirs that you even cooperate well with them, despite the painful nostalgia it brings you back to the past, and it is absurd to you how the orgy that taints your once tranquil night feels natural. Of course it is. You have always fantasised for them to fuck you just exactly like this with their masks on.

“Fuck off, dude. You already dicked it in her. It’s my turn now.” Jay snarls at Jake, and you can only imagine the scowl on his face behind the mask. Yes, they are still wearing their mask, and miraculously, they are able to withstand the heat. You feel Jay’s possessive grip on the flesh of your bum, causing you to roll your eyes at their banter. “I’m not about to fuck her with your dick in her again.”

“Why? Afraid that you’ll get turned on by my dick instead of her pussy?” Jake retorts, grabbing his shaft to point aim at your anal that has been prepped by Sunghoon. “Nothing wrong with some bromance.”

“Either the two of you stop arguing and start fucking her, or I’ll do it instead.” Sunghoon voices out his annoyance that is accompanied by your whine of agreement. “Be grateful that you got both her pussy and ass. I got her mouth.”

“Better than nothing.” Heeseung sighs, watching as you unhinge your jaw for Sunghoon and welcome him when he slides his cock into your mouth. He can see the way your throat bulges each time Sunghoon fucks his cock deeper, eliciting gurgled and choked sounds from you in between moans from being fucked by Jay underneath you, whereas Jake uses your anal hole to fuck you fervently.

Feeling a little neglected, Heeseung steps forward and grabs your hand, to which you seem to understand his need, prompting your hand to latch on his cock that is completely erected before you finally fist him. Thankfully, with the strength of Jay and Jake supporting your body, you are able to satisfy Heeseung with how dexterous you are with your hand.

With the four men being occupied by your every hole and touch, there is a twisted symphony of dominance and submission that mingles with their carnal lust. Their affectionate praise and derogatory enunciating to you intensifies your heightened libido, while your depravity desires for them to corrupt you with their intoxication it had dearly missed.

“Fuck, baby, you’re squeezing me. You’re going to cum, yeah?” Jay rasps, gripping the flesh of your bum with his nails, causing indents to your skin as he presses them, his thrusts remaining vigorous as though he intends to obliterate you. “You always get so fucking wet. Squirt for me again.”

And you do, your screams and moans being muffled by Sunghoon’s shaft as he fucks you deeply until he reaches your throat, using you like his fleshlight. Your orgasm crashes down on you for the ninth time, your cunt spasming around Jay as you squirt profusely, while at the same time, Heeseung’s cock is spurting with his cum, making a mess all over your hand.

Jake, who has been trying to attain his orgasm, feels frustrated by the fact that your anal hole does nothing to help him, and so he withdraws from your now-gaping hole, only to shove his thick girth into your cunt that remains squirting.

“Dude!” Jay groans, throwing his head to the back in frustration while you gasp at the abrupt intrusion that sends your already-stretched cunt a blistering pain. “I just told you─”

“Shut up. Either her pussy or your virgin hole.” Jake snaps, groaning at the sensation of your walls vacuuming him. “Don’t fucking test me.”

“Damn. Are you sure you’re not gay?” Sunghoon manages to make a wit despite approaching his climax as he uses your mouth like the way he uses your pussy, causing you to roll your eyes to the back. 

Jake scoffs, unfazed by the question, before he rams his cock into you harder while you feel him hitting your cervix deliciously, which sends you into a new blissful euphoria. “I don’t fucking care. As long as there’s a hole, I’ll fuck into it.”

It isn’t long until Sunghoon has finally dumped his cum into your throat, forcing you to swallow every drop before he withdraws from you. Your breathing is ragged, with your chest heaving up and down from every exertion. A breathy moan escapes you as Jay and Jake get frenzied in the way they fuck your weeping cunt.

“Can we─” You pause as soon as Heeseung replaces Sunghoon, standing in front of you with his cock going erect once more. You whine as he teases you with the head of his cock, giving you a light slap on the corner of your lips. “Can we take a break after this?”

“My beloved, I don’t think you understand what you’ve just started.” Heeseung says softly, his fingers brushing away your strands from your sticky face, and his gesture is a deception you recognise. “We’re going all the way, no stopping. It’s what you get after leaving us.”

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

Before the daybreak dawns, you have already expeditiously prepared for your departure once more, albeit it isn’t permanent as your purpose is solely to avoid them for as long as you can, especially after what happened a few hours ago before all of you finally passed out in your room.

Hence, the reason why they wake up to find you nowhere in your own apartment, having been aroused by an odd feeling of stark coldness before realising that it derives from your sudden absence. Instinctively, they panic at the thought of you abandoning them once more, and their devastation returns when one of them spots a pink sticky note on the coffee table.

‘Surely, you guys know the way out the same way you got in without invitation. Since you got what you wanted last night, stay away from me this time, and I mean it.’

The devastation is eclipsed by resentment, wondering what went wrong when last night was nothing but pure bliss with you, which they haven’t felt in a long time, so they can’t understand why and how your mind that is filled with such complexity works.

“We should stay until she gets back.” Jake suggests, his eyes glinting with hope as he stares at his gloomy best friends. “She can’t stay outside all day till night time.”

“She’s changed, Jake, so yes, she can. We can’t underestimate her.” Heeseung heaves a sigh, masking his disappointment as he doesn’t wish for them to see his weak moment. “We should leave, and Jake, undo the hack shit you did to her door.”

“Let’s give her some time to think.” Jay voices out his opinion despite feeling displeased with himself. “We’ll come back for her in a few days or so. She can’t avoid us forever.”

“I don’t want her to hate us anymore.” Sunghoon murmurs, his demeanour turning crestfallen, a rare display. “I can’t afford to lose her. Ah, fuck it. I’m not going to lose her. I’ll lock her up somewhere if I have to.”

“We all can’t afford to lose her, Hoon.” Heeseung says, wearing a grim countenance. “We’ll be damned if we ever do. Hence, we must fix what we broke.”

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

Despite their differences, their unwavering devotion to you is something that they have in common, which derives from the feelings they have always harboured for you, even after you departed from their lives. Feelings that are beyond platonic as well as the affection that is only reserved for you, and no matter their prominent Casanova reputation in the past, no one has ever made them feel so deeply until you.

Sure, it started out as infatuation that stemmed from their preying on you in order to corrupt you, but eventually that infatuation turns something so profound and darker that passed beyond the borderline of obsession, and unbeknownst to you, you made them far more dangerous than they originally were before.

They would have killed for you if you had asked them to. They would have done anything for you, anything, no matter the price. All they wanted was for you to stay by their side until the end. Hence, after learning of your departure, it drove them to the brink of their sanity, just stark madness.

It was even worse when they didn’t find out directly from you but from their trusted apprentices, also known as the now-leaders of Devil’s Knights. It was indeed an upheaval night of rage and betrayal.

--------

“Jungwon, you might want to rethink this. It isn’t too late to back out.” Riki murmured lowly to his best friend, whose eyes hardened with such resolve as they stared straight ahead at specific individuals. “This is definitely a bad idea.”

It had been only a day since you left, but Jungwon felt terribly awful for the now-ex leaders upon seeing how the long distance they forced themselves to establish in order to give you space disheartened their spirits and the fact that they had no knowledge of your planned departure. Jungwon felt that it wasn’t right to keep them in the dark any longer, and he doubted that they wouldn’t ever find out about you.

“If they ever plan to kill us after this, trust me when I say that I’ll be doing them a favour by killing you first instead.” Sunoo whispered hotly to Jungwon, his foxy-like eyes glaring into Jungwon’s face, seeming to amuse two of the leaders ahead while the other two maintained austere demeanours. Sunoo continued to express his annoyance to his best friend. “Seriously, do you even realise that you’re asking for a death wish by coming here?”

Jungwon only grimaced in response, but he did reevaluate on this matter several times for the past days, and he came to a conclusion that they must be alerted about this matter post haste, never mind the fact that he might be skinned alive. Sunoo and Riki had implored him even before they came to the palace, and both of them vehemently intended to keep their words, which they had promised you. They might be as detrimental as the leaders, but they were a man of their words.

“You said you got news to tell us, so don’t keep us waiting.” The three of them flinched at the Sunghoon’s flinty tone, prompting them to cease whatever they were doing as they diverted their attention to him.

Jungwon discreetly clenched his fist, swallowing down a lump in his throat while mentally preparing himself, his sharp eyes betraying none of the turmoil within. “It’s about Y/N.” He starts off, his voice coming out strong. “We came over to her place and told her everything.”

“What was her response? Has she decided to forgive and return to us?” Heeseung raised his eyebrow inquisitively, his stance displaying an avid interest while his eyes flickered with longing that made the Jungwon inwardly wince.

“Not exactly, but we brought Beomgyu to her, and as expected, the bastard didn’t apologise to her.” Sunoo answers for Jungwon, masking his nervousness with his usual quirk, his lips forming a crooked smile. “She punched him after he insulted her.”

“That’s our girl.” Sunghoon’s tone was filled with such pride and affection for you, his lips curving into a smirk as he imagined how good you punched Beomgyu.

Jay, who had been silently studying their body language and examining the contortion in their faces with penetrating eyes, was acutely aware that the three of them were hiding something from them, especially after knowing them for years. 

“You’re hiding something.” Jay’s stern statement seemed to intensify the foreboding atmosphere in the living room. His dour countenance shaken them inwardly. “Fess up, or you won’t be allowed to leave.”

Sunoo and Riki exchanged wary glances before they looked at Jungwon, whose demeanour remained unchanged, and they knew that there was no changing his mind.

“Y/N isn’t here anymore. She left Seoul yesterday.” Jungwon finally revealed the truth, his eyes carefully examining the expressions plastered on their faces. “

“What do you mean she left Seoul?” Heeseung re-emphasised the question rather slowly, but they could sense the danger lurking beneath his treading words.

“I meant, she left Seoul permanently. She won’t be coming back.” Jungwon elaborated, nearly rambling as the tension was palpable. “I just thought of telling you this before any of you decided to go over to her house─”

“And you thought it was a good fucking idea to tell us now?!” The three of them were caught off guard by Jake’s raging outburst, and they knew that they were fucked up because Jake had never shown and directed his wrath towards them for as long as they could recall.

“Wait! We can explain!” Just as Sunoo intended to plead, Jake marches over in an attempt to lunge for Jungwon and give him a good punch in the face, but Jay immediately stepped forward and grabbed Jake before things could turn into a nasty brawl.

Despite brimming the same ire, Jay remained composed, a muscle pulsing in his jaw as he held Jake back while the latter was seeing red. “Calm down! Punching Jungwon or any of them isn’t going to do anything, let alone bring her back!” Jay barked at Jake, who easily broke free from his deadly clutch.

“But they kept this from us when they should’ve told us straight away! And now she’s gone!” Jake is practically seething, veins protruding in his neck and eyes glaring heatedly that could probably make anyone outside of their circle wet their pants. His knuckles are painted white by how tight he is clenching his fist, mastering self-control when he catches Heeseung’s stern eyes, a silent message for him to restrain himself.

“I agree with Jake.” Sunghoon adds in, his tone remaining impassive, but the emotions in his eyes are storming with both anger and devastation at the revelation. His eyes hardened. “The three of you already know how important she is to us, and yet you didn’t bother to let us know earlier. You fucking idiots.”

“In our defence, we were simply respecting Y/N’s wish! We even gave our word to her!” Sunoo retorted, his once-witty disposition molten by vehemence defensiveness, subtly moving forward to embody a barrier between Jake and Jungwon. “She even pleaded with us, as she didn’t want any of you to know.”

“She knew that you wouldn’t allow her to leave.” Riki added, his dark eyes conveying a knowingness to them. He clenched his jaw, feeling a surge of protectiveness to defend in your honour. “I respect you as my leaders and friends, but don’t you dare blame her for her decision to leave. She deserved better after what happened.”

“You damn right, we wouldn’t have allowed her to leave.” Jake snarls coldly at them, his eyes blazing with intense conviction. “Now tell us. Where did she go?”

“We can’t tell you.” Sunoo’s answer only seems to fuel Jake’s rage, prompting Jay to curb the latter as he embodies a barrier between them.

“What the fuck do you mean by that?!” Jake gritted his teeth, his outburst earning him a brief glare from Jay, which he merely ignored.

“We can’t tell you, because we genuinely have no idea where she decided to go.” Riki said, his tone sounding eerily calm, as does his demeanour, while his eyes displaying stark sincerity. “Again, she knew that if she had told us, you would force the answer out of us.”

Jungwon heaved a sigh as he stepped out of Sunoo’s shadow, having had enough of this prolonged confrontation and tantrum. “But she did mention that it was where she had always dreamed of travelling to.”

“As if that information would help us.” Jake scoffed, and despite his rage, they could see the devastation racking through him from the devastating revelation of your departure. “You know what? Fuck this, and fuck you. I’ll just find her myself.”

“Jake, wait─” Heeseung called out for Jake, but the latter was too caught up with the tempestuous emotions within him as he grabbed his coat from the armchair before storming his way out of the living room.

“The three of you could’ve tried stopping her.” Sunghoon uttered, a sombre casting shadow across his features. “Then maybe she would’ve changed her mind about leaving.”

“I don’t think it would make any difference.” Sunoo shook his head, his lips pressing together thinly while a fleeting melancholy flickered in his gaze. “Even if she already knew the truth from us, there was nothing that could change her mind about leaving.”

“I’m sorry.” Jungwon muttered, his eyes turning crestfallen as he looked at the three now-ex leaders before locking eyes with Jay, whose eyes hardened with emotions he couldn’t fathom. “We’re sorry for not trying harder to convince her to stay.”

Jay looked away from them with a clenched jaw. “Yeah, I’m sorry too.”

--------

From that moment forth, things were never the same. Living in the palace felt daunting to them without your presence that used to enliven the dull, imposing palace. Their once-unbreakable comradeship between each other had palpable tension, and there were moments where they blamed each other for your departure, pointing blame at one another’s flaws they made towards you in all of the times they had treated you.

But at the end of the day, they knew their own selves were to blame. After the revelation from the three new leaders, days bled into agonising weeks, and before they knew it, two months had passed and they knew that life must go on, even without you by their side.

Despite being utterly devastated by your departure, to which each of them struggled and coped differently, they decided to push aside their ego and cooperate with one another to devise a plan, which was to learn of your current location first before proceeding to another stage.

A sense of normalcy befell the four best friends as they tried everything in their power to find you, and even Jake tried to track you down by recalling the tracker he actually had chipped in your phone, but his hope was crushed when he couldn’t detect your location as you had changed your phone and contact.

They did have some thoughts about going over to your parents and asking about you, but they couldn’t face your mother after her infidelity involving their fathers, so they held some grudges against her. Hence, they coerced Sunoo, Jungwon, and Riki to ask your parents instead, to which they, of course, begrudgingly did, only to receive disappointment by the fact that your parents had no idea either.

It hurt them as you seemed to have carefully planned this that not even your parents knew about which state you went to, because did you hate them that much?

Afterwards, their motivation deteriorated, and they proceeded on with their lives as they also needed to focus on their careers in respective fields in relation to their degrees.

Seven long months have passed, but their longing for you only intensified in the most excruciating way, and it was killing them more than it should despite their miraculous ability to simulate a coequal facade that displayed their cold detachment in front of the others except towards each other.

There were moments when they wanted to give up and cease mapping possibilities of where you might be, until their hope rekindled.

--------

“Hold the fuck up. You mean to tell us that after seven months, you finally remembered the one crucial detail of her that we could’ve used to our advantage back then?” Jake nearly growled out, his dark eyes glaring into Sunghoon's, whereas the male was completely undeterred by the fact that he could be in the path of his best friend’s wrath.

“Don’t put the blame on me. I had many things going on in my mind back then.” Sunghoon defended himself, shooting him a scowl as he remained leisurely seated on the couch. “Besides, it’s only a maybe. We’re not even sure if she really went to Milan, so we can’t make any rash decisions right now.”

“Sunghoon’s right.” Heeseung concurred, earning him a glare of disbelief from Jake, to which Heeseung reciprocated with a pointed look. “As much as I want her back, we need to think rationally, Jake. We have already established our careers here, and we can’t toss all of our hard work away just like that.”

“We can just utilise our annual leaves or even unpaid leaves, I don’t care. I’d rather take the risk than to wait around here any longer,” Jake retorted vehemently, his resolution blazing in his eyes. “This is our Y/N we’re talking about. She’s the─” He paused, nearly whimpering as he looked away from their eyes. “She’s the love of my life.”

There was a shift in the air, evoking such poignancy from them as they went silent for a brief moment. Jay eyed his best friends, hating how uncharacteristically dejected they looked once again, and so he knew what he must do, thanks to Sunghoon.

“Who are you texting?” Heeseung inquired, watching Jay with calculated eyes as the latter was focused on his phone.

“My cousin. He lives in Milan. Thanks to Sunghoon, we have a lead, and at least it’s better than nothing.” Jay said while his fingers were working their way on the phone screen as he got immersed in texting his cousin from his father’s side. “He’s online, by the way. Since he has resources and connections, he is more than willing to help us out, so all we have to do now is wait.”

“Wait?” Jake scoffed in disbelief, his patience running dangerously thinly, as evident in his countenance. “There is no more waiting! Tell your cousin to speed up, or is he too incompetent─”

“Jake.” Heeseung snapped coldly, his tone reverberating throughout the living room, and they knew that he meant business. “Enough of your shit. You need to blow off some steam.”

“I second that.” Sunghoon feigned coughing, to which Jake cast a withering glare before he finally took off with Heeseung’s advice.

Not even moments later when Jay’s phone rang, garnering their attention to him as he quickly answered an incoming call from a certain cousin. Jay raised his finger at them, pressing his phone against his ear as he moved away from them while they resumed minding their business in the living room, assuming that Jay was on a call with someone else.

It took Jay awhile before he finally returned to Heeseung and Sunghoon with the look on his face earning inquisitive eyebrows raised from both.

“You look a little too happy. Why? Your daddy finally promoted you to take over his business?” Sunghoon’s tone dripping with mockery went under-appreciated by Jay, as the latter was too preoccupied by the hope that bloomed pleasantly in his chest.

“I was on a call with my cousin.” Jay revealed, which piqued their full interest, leaning their bodies slightly forward. A smirk touched Jay’s lips while his eyes darkened with a familiar danger. “Well, it looks like our angel is right where we thought she would be.”

--------

Frankly, Jay assumed that the chances of his cousin tracking your precise location in Milan were low, but much to his delightful surprise, his cousin turned out to be your acquaintance, and yet the thought of another male, even if he was his cousin, displeased him greatly.

Nevertheless, the universe seemed to be working in their favour at the time, so after settling their respective businesses in regards to their careers, to which they found their solution, they finally embarked on a new journey as well, and their only shared goal is to get you back, no matter what it takes.

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

Two days granted you less than expected for you to ruminate over the licentious encounter you had with them, the ones you thought you could escape from. The rational part of you has been incessantly rebuking you for betraying your resolution, which you thought was adamantine, but your depravity is satiated with their compulsive intoxication that felt like it breathed you to life.

The erotic recollection precipitously surfaces in your mind, prompting you to drink your smoothie aggressively while warmth weaves across your cheeks. Oh, yeah, you enjoyed it more than you should. You would never admit this to them, but they fucked you better than the last time they did, and you know that it has something to do with one of your twisted fantasies of being fucked by masked men.

Shaking your head at the recollection, you proceed to exit the washroom and head back to your table where your best friends are seated for refreshments in the cafe after an hour or so of you accompanying them to shop.

Although you have regained your full vitality, you occasionally limp whenever you walk—well, more like you feel your knees buckling underneath you before you quickly steady yourself. If your best friends have noticed it, then they are doing a great job at closing both eyes to it.

As you slide over to your seat, you pretend to be engrossed in their conversation while your mind drifts off to them, and questions begin to linger in your head, including their sudden yet mysterious detachment.

Though you are thankful that they weren’t outside and inside of your apartment, you can’t help but be curious, wondering if they finally decided to leave you alone for good after the note you left for them to read or if they are busy with their other pursuits, such as careers. Surely, they should already have landed their respective careers despite wielding immense wealth that could probably last for generations.

You ignore the growing ache in your chest, refusing to acknowledge the familiar longing for them. This is exactly what you wanted — for them to leave you for good, but needles seem to be endlessly piercing through your bleeding heart, and the only way to stop this unabating maelstrom within you is to curb your ego and admit to yourself that you still want them.

You clench your fist that is resting on your thigh, embittered by the fact that you are once again thrown into a dilemma with your emotions tangled in a web. When your eyes shift to your best friends, something pulls at the strings in your heart as you dispiritedly wonder whether or not they will be revolted at you like they once were if you vent out your repressing feelings to them.

“Y/N, a penny for your thoughts?” Jennifer’s voice breaks through the rumination you are in, pulling you back into the bleak reality. Your eyes lock with Jennifer, who is sitting across from you and whose eyes show genuine concern. “You keep spacing out, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen you so stressed since─” She pauses, grimacing as she doesn’t wish to trigger you. “Well, you know.”

You bite down your lip, your eyes shifting elsewhere other than their curious yet concerned eyes, contemplating whether to let them know, but you trust them and no doubt that they will support you.

A sigh leaves your lips. “Something happened two nights ago.” And so you begin to unravel every piece, not missing out any details while they surprisingly listen without interrupting you, and just as you expect, genuine shock that laces the anger is written across their features, whereas Jennifes doesn’t look as shocked, almost as if she knows something, but you brush it off.

Of course, you also include the fact that you slept with them, but not into depth, and by that, you mean the part where you actually have a twisted fantasy about getting fucked by masked men. You don’t want to potentially aggravate the situation, especially when they look a little less appalled.

As soon as you finish, you clasp your hands together on the table as you look down, unable to muster the courage to look at the possible revulsion on their countenance, just as you feel towards yourself. So much for betraying your own resolve.

“You girls probably hate me for going against my word.” You mutter, your eyes hardening as your mind is once again your enemy, rebuking you incessantly. “I know I can’t blame the alcohol entirely.”

“We don’t hate you, Y/N.” Wonyoung, who has been sitting next to you, reaches out to grab your slightly trembling cold hand in her grasp, prompting you to lift your head up slowly to meet her kind eyes. “If you think that we’re going to condemn and shame you, then you’re wrong. I mean, yes, we’re shocked and in disbelief that they somehow managed to find you here, but honestly, our feelings don’t matter. I think I can say for Karina and Jen that we no longer give a damn about the ex-leaders.”

“Plus, we’ve already known that they were not entirely responsible for what happened a year ago.” Karina seems to be treading with her words carefully as she examines your face. “Wony’s right. Our feelings don’t matter when it comes to this, but what matters most is your feelings. You told us the details, but you never really told us about how you’re feeling.”

You can feel every bit of your once steely resolve crumbling as you so desperately cling onto those bits. “I don’t know what to feel. All my emotions are going haywire.” You tell them sincerely, your eyes turning crestfallen. “I know I said that I wanted to wipe the slate clean and never looked back to my past, but now that they’re here, I don’t know what to do.” You continue to pour out bits of your pent-up emotions, your face appearing in such distress as you run your fingers through your hair. “What if they come back again? Should I pretend to ignore their existence? Should I hurt them with words?”

The three ladies exchange meaningful glances before Jennifer takes initiative as she leans her body forward with heedful attention, her stern yet kind eyes ensnaring you. “We’re in no position to tell you what to do, but we can only advise you to follow your heart’s desires.”

“But I can’t. I don’t want to.” You say, frustration bubbling within you while devastation storms in your gaze. “If I follow what my heart desires, then I’ll be betraying my own promises, and I don’t want any toxicity in my new life here. I’ve had enough of that. I deserve better.”

“Yes, you deserve so much better, but Y/N,” Karina pauses, her hesitation is obvious in the way she looks at you. “Do you still love them?”

The one mistake you make is the fact that you hesitate as soon as the question leaves her lips. After a couple beats of silence, you decide to respond, but the tremor in your voice is palpable. “No, I don’t. I stopped loving them after what happened.”

“A year later, and you still suck at lying.” Jennifer points out rather amusingly. “I love you, but you gotta stop being in denial.”

“I’m not in denial.” You retort vehemently, shooting her a scowl. “I meant what I said. I don’t love them.”

“And I’m getting married, so we’re both liars, then.” Wonyoung remarks, raising an eyebrow at you. “We’re not buying any of your words, Y/N.”

“Come on. Just admit it.” Karina presses, and you can feel the last of your patience stretching so thinly. “Why are you so afraid of admitting it?”

Alas, something inside of you finally snaps, your eyes going ablaze with unrestrained vehemence of ire that blends with the sheer vulnerability, taking them by surprise. “Fine, you want to know why I’m so afraid? It’s because if I admit it, then it’ll be the end of me, and I can’t allow that to happen.” Your voice shakes palpably with a torrent of emotions. “I lost myself once, all because I was so desperate and foolishly hoping for them to reciprocate what I felt for them. I refuse to lose myself for another time.”

Jennifer’s eyes soften. “Y/N─”

You shake your head at her, looking away from them as you quickly blink the accumulating tears that glisten in your eyes. “I don’t want to love again, which is why I’ve told you girls that I had no interest in dating. I’ll only hurt myself by my own expectations.”

“We’re sorry, Y/N.” Karina tells you sincerely, her tone sounding apologetic. “We knew how much they meant to you.”

Wonyoung reaches out to squeeze your shoulder in a comforting support. “We respect your decision in whatever you choose to do. Just do what you think is right and best for you.”

Jennifer offers you a small smile that seems to temporarily ease your nerves. “We’re here to support you, Y/N, even if you choose to return to them.”

“Thank you, girls, really.” You cast them a faint smile, feeling a tad overwhelmed by their reaffirmation support. A sigh leaves your lips before the familiar steel of resolve returns to your demeanour as you finally align with your rationality. “Now I know what to do next.”

Even if it means breaking your own heart that remains beating in a familiar longing cadence for them.

▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰▰

After sending Karina and Wonyoung back to their hotel apartment, Jennifer, who thankfully is the only one in your circle to pass her driver’s license, drives you back to yours, as she has already told you beforehand that she intended to have a sleepover at your crib after so long.

Plus, it is a great opportunity for you to desist from ruminating in your dilemma since Jennifer has generously bought two finest bottles of wine, which you were shocked to learn about the prices, but nevertheless, Jennifer wasn’t deterred in the slightest. Perks of being a nepo baby, you think.

“So, I was thinking that maybe we could watch gossip girls, and yes, I know I’ve watched it before, but you haven’t,” Jennifer continues to blabber, even as you two board the elevator to head to your floor, for which you are grateful as you feel the last of your fraying nerves ebbing away.

It isn’t long when the two of you finally reach the floor of your apartment, but as you are nearing your unit, your steps feel heavier in a trice and dreadful turmoil within you, to which you have no idea why. With your slightly trembling hand, you search for the key card in your purse while Jennifer is in the middle of texting on her phone, completely oblivious to the mounting tension in the air.

You nearly fumble with tapping the key card on the smart lock, earning you an inquisitive eyebrow raised from Jennifer as her attention shifts from her phone, to which you simply ignore as you slowly push down the handle, allowing Jennifer to enter first.

“First things first, I’m feeling hungry, so I’m ordering food.” Jennifer says as she busily removes her heels to place them in the shoe compartment before grabbing for the house shoes, which you bought a few extra in case there are visitors. She casts a questioning look over her shoulder as you switch the buttons on, prompting illumination to cast a glow in your apartment before the two of you advance further. “Do you want any?”

Just as you intend to give her your answer, Jennifer stops dead in her tracks, looking genuinely staggered while her eyes are staring straight ahead, compelling you to shift your attention to the same axis as hers, and just like that, you completely understand why there is a persistent turmoil within you.

Although you feel a tad staggered, annoyance and anger seize over you, as evident in the way your icy eyes are glaring, because in your line of sight are the very individuals whom you thought had departed from your life after not seeing them for two days.

“Oh, um, I’m just gonna─” It painfully astounds you to see Jennifer being out of her assertive element as you hear a distinct crack in her voice and the way she casts you a look with a small smile that looks awful-like a grimace. “I’ll see myself in the guest room while you─er─” She gestures her hand in a moving motion between you and them.

Upon receiving a deadly silence emanating from your brooding figure, Jennifer barrels in the direction of the guest room, her legs a guiding memory, now leaving you alone with them.

As the frigid silence persists that weighs heavily in the air, you take this moment to study their stark appearance under these illuminations, which you didn’t have the chance to two nights ago with the exception of two of them whom you had seen at the Milan fashion week, and as you do, you can feel your heart breaking bit by bit that is taking its splintering effect on your steely resolve. 

Jake, who is nearest to you, captures your initial attention, and in the way his body language seems to insinuate his self-restraint in laying a hold of you since he is just within an arm's reach if he takes another step. His raven locks look trimmed but are still familiarly irresistible, to which your fingers are itching to run through them. You can feel the strings in your heart pulling painfully as you notice how he seems to have lost weight on his face as well as his eyes that were once gleaming with wonted mirth and mischief have lost their sparks.

Sunghoon is standing by the balcony with his hands tucked in the pockets of his jeans, his posture displaying such nonchalance that parallels his dour countenance, but even you can discern the familiar longing in his eyes amplified at the moment your eyes lock with his, betraying his impassiveness. His raven strands fall over his thick brows, tempting you to brush them away like you once did. As your eyes roam around his features to scrutinise, you wonder when was the last time he ever smiled genuinely.

A few distance away, Jay’s figure seems imposing as he stands directly across from you with his lower back leaning against the couch’s armrest and one hand tucked inside the pocket of his jacket. His sharp flinty eyes compel you, locking you in place with his sharp flinty eyes, but you can see that his wintry facade melts, causing his features to soften with a familiar tenderness reserved only for you. 

When your eyes flicker over to Heeseung, who is leaning behind against the wall next to the balcony with his arms folded across his chest, your heart that has been beating in a familiar cadence seems to amplify. His mere presence is enough to dominate the entire room while his silence is resounding. Like a siren’s serenade, he easily ensnares you with his eyes that hold unfathomable emotions.

They look devastatingly as handsome as they were, maybe even more, but there is a certain ambience they exude that corresponds to one another.

Sensing a gradual shift in your demeanour, you strengthen the walls you built to protect your mended heart that coarsen a callousness in your facade, refusing for them to allow just the slightest glimpse of your vulnerability that derives from the feelings your weeping heart still harbours.

You adopt an intimidating stance, your arms folded below your chest while your eyes hold a glaring detachment, displaying your unbending resolution, which is to drive them away from your life for good.

“I thought I made it clear in that note when I told you to stay away from me.” You start off, your flinty tone sounds awfully foreign to them, just as you look at them now, and they hate it. “You already got what you wanted two nights ago, so what do you want from me?”

“Don’t you still get it? We want you.” Jay speaks for his best friends, but even the determination coming out strong in the way he enunciates their correlative intention is not resonating enough to coax your tenacity.

You click your tongue in annoyance, your icily glaring eyes are in sheer disbelief. “If that’s what you came here for, then you’ve just wasted your time.”

“Why are you being like this?” Jake voices out, drawing your attention to his eyes that glisten with emotions despite his composure while your heart clenches in return. “Please, sweetheart, we want you to return to us. That’s all we want.”

“Bolt of you to assume that I would return to you.” You scoff, rolling your eyes as you maintain your established resolve that is teetering dangerously. “You can’t just waltz back into my life after what happened.”

“We didn’t stop searching for you after you left, even when we thought there would be no hope.” Heeseung says quietly, but the gravity in his tone resonates with you, prompting you to meet his dark intent eyes. “We went through lengths just to get to where you were. We came to Milan solely for you.”

“Well, that’s on you, then. I didn’t ask for you to do all of that.” There is a certain edge in your tone, adding to the rising tension that is nearly palpable between you and them. “I didn’t even ask for you to search for me when the whole purpose was to get away from the very place that brought me misery.”

“You’re right, but for you, we would do anything. You should’ve known this, princess.” Sunghoon leans away from the balcony to saunter forward as he looks at you sternly. “We would do anything to get you back.”

This time, you fail to restrain your brewing ire, your arms falling to your sides as you clench a fist. “Do I look like I want to return to any of you?” You ask rhetorically with a derisive chuckle leaving your lips. “If you’re here to force me to accept you back, then I suggest you leave now. Don’t─” You pause, swallowing a painful lump in your throat as you muster the courage before forcing your voice with conviction. “Don’t make me hate you more than I already do. So please, leave.”

“I don’t understand you, Y/N.” Sunghoon displays his frustration towards you, his eyes hardening. “A year ago, Sunoo, Jungwon, and Riki already explained to you the truth, so what more do you want in order for you to return─”

Something inside of you finally snaps. “What I want is for you to fucking leave!” You raise your voice, your ire mingling with exasperation releases in a torrent of outburst as you continue. “I want you to leave me alone for good! I’m already happy with my life, and for once, everything that has happened in my life ever since I left Seoul is working out for me!” You refrain the tears that burn the back of your eyes from revealing your vulnerability. “I won’t allow any of you to destroy that─ to destroy me again.”

“Destroy you again?” Jay scoffs in disbelief, leaning away from the sofa. “I don’t understand why you even thought that we destroyed you when all we’ve done was show you that there was more to life than holding yourself back from unleashing what your heart truly desired.”

“Wasn’t that your goal when you decided to prey on me in the first place?” You bite back, your jaw locking while your chin wobbles with anger that overweighs the hurt as you recall. “You weren’t sincere with me and did it for the sake of your twisted tradition. You influenced me to become the worst version of myself when I should’ve been good─”

“But you were. You were always good, even to us, beloved.” Heeseung cuts you off, his mellow tone is so oddly overpowering that even you feel weakened, especially in the way his softened eyes are looking at you. “Forget about the preying. If we weren’t sincere with you, then we wouldn’t fly across the globe to find you.”

“Please, sweetheart.” Jake takes a daring step forward, causing you to back away while you ignore the disappointment flicker in his gaze. “We also came here to ask for your forgiveness, so please give us another chance.”

A shaky breath leaves your lips. “I forgive you.” You declare with the utmost sincerity, sparking hopes in their chest, but your face shows no traces of reconciliation. “Now you got what you came for, so leave me alone.”

“We thought you’d accept us back, and we thought you’d be fine with us now.” Sunghoon’s frustration is more than apparent in the way he speaks to you, reminding you the times when he was insufferable. “Two nights ago, you wanted us, and you let us fuck you. Is this your way to play mind games with us?”

“It’s true I wanted you to fuck me that night, but it was nothing too personal. Can you blame me for not getting someone to fuck me as good as you did?” Piercing mockery laces your tone, aligning with the cruelty that forms a smirk on your tinted lips as you revel in the way they look evidently hurt and angry at the thought of you sleeping with someone else. ”Don’t be mad, now. It was only fair that I do the same thing like you did to me in the past. I mean, you did prey on me to use me and get me to be your personal slut.”

“You’re so cruel, baby.” Jay mutters, his steely demeanour melting into something that displays a rare vulnerability. “You have no idea how miserable we felt after you left. You didn’t even give us some heads up, unlike you did with Sunoo, Jungwon, and Riki.”

“You have no right to feel miserable, especially when you weren’t the ones who received such dehumanising words thrown at you every single day!” You retort vehemently, and this time, tears prickle in your eyes at the recollection. “So now you’re blaming me when you could’ve come and told me the truth yourself about the entire thing instead of them!”

Sunghoon scoffs in disbelief, his chiselled jaw tightening afterwards while his eyes level with your glaring ones. “But would you even have listened to us, let alone seen us?”

“But you could’ve tried! If you wanted me that bad, then you should’ve tried harder!” You hold back a sob, your voice trembling as you pour out the things you held back for a long time. “But no, you didn’t even bother to reach out to me for days when I thought that you were the ones entirely responsible for what happened!”

“We were busy searching for Taehyun when we thought he was the mastermind before we finally found out about Beomgyu.” Heeseung saunters forward in your direction, intending to comfort you as the hurt written all over your face hits him in the gut. Heeseung exchanges glances with his best friends, who give him collective nods. “It’s not only that, but we felt guilty because we didn’t listen to you in the first place to delete them, so we couldn’t face you, and we doubted that you wanted to see our faces.”

You hear him, you hear his reasoning, and a part of you knows that you can’t blame him for their doubts in the first place, as things back then were taut with agonising tension. Your sensibility is convincing you that they were being considerate and didn’t want to aggravate the situation back then. Maybe if communication was anchored between you and them, then you would not have felt as deeply wounded as you were.

The four of them observe you, noticing that you seem to grapple with your emotions and how things got escalated. They wish to comfort you and embrace you like they used to, but they heard you. They heard the clarity in your hatred for them.

You blink your tears away, trying your utmost not to crumble in front of them after all the efforts you built yourself into becoming the better and stronger version of yourself, unlike the old Y/N Kang.

Rallying your frayed nerves, you muster the courage to look at them dead in the eyes, and yet, your eyes are conveying such a plea that renders them devastated once more. “I’m tired, and it’s been a long day. I don’t want to keep arguing with you like this, so please.” Your shaky voice betrays your tenacity. “Please leave.”

Reluctancy holds them back, and they so desperately want to fix everything they have broken, but they know that they can’t do it just overnight. Jake dares himself to try to reach out to you, but the sound of footsteps garners their attention to Jennifer, who, unbeknownst to you, has heard everything, ambling into the living room.

Jennifer’s presence provides you little comfort, but it is enough for you to lean slightly towards her moral support. Her icily glaring eyes as she stares at them convey a silent message to the four to leave, and it is final.

Eventually, they have no choice but to concede, seeing their way out, but as they brush past you, they struggle to fight against their instinctive urges to hold you close. You look away from them while their distinctive cologne infiltrating your senses seems to bring more memories that taunt you in your head.

As soon as the door closes, Jennifer’s austere demeanour melts, replaced by the usual protectiveness and concern for you as she advances towards you. “Y/N─”

“I’m fine, Jen.” You insist strongly, giving her a tight smile before you make your way to the kitchen island. “What I need is that wine you bought.”

It isn’t long until you and Jennifer settle by the kitchen island, silence engulfing both of you that feels painfully foreign, but after what happened just before this, it just doesn’t feel right to resort to normalcy.

As Jennifer places down her empty glass, she bites down her lips, contemplating whether or not to let you know. A sigh leaves her lips as she has decided. “I eavesdropped on you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. It doesn’t matter either.” You state bluntly, while your nonchalance only makes Jennifer feel sceptical. Your hollow eyes are staring into oblivion. “We’re done for good, anyway.”

“I doubt that. As much as I don’t like them, I know that they’ll come back to you again soon.” Jennifer says, treading with her words carefully.

“Please, Jen, let’s not have a conversation about them. We’re here to have fun and drink away our sorrows.” You chuckle dryly before meeting her concerned eyes. You shoot her a lopsided smile, raising the glass of wine leisurely in the air. “Here’s a toast to my past trying to fuck me up again. Besides, there is nothing better than to drown your heartbreak with wine. 

But it doesn’t get better, as their stark absence from your apartment only seems to hurt you instead of relieving you.

TAGLIST:

@aishigrey @kgneptun @smg-valeria @lhspeachie @enhaverse713586

@strxwbloody @firstclassjaylee @jwnghyuns @deobitifull @loumin908

@sousydive @pinkkami @skzenhalove @caravm @shinrjj

@loljaeyunz @yorukoshii @nshmrarki @lol6sposts

@lilyuwon @enha-crumbs @slut4hee @capri-cuntz @kaykay11sworld

@firesunflames @notevenheretbh1 @parksunghoonsgf @luvkpopp @eastleighsblog

@in-somnias-world @nyxtwixx @theresawtf @fuxktaekook @readbyjjk

@yunhoswrldddd @fuxktaekook @bobaikeu @minjaexvz @heelariously

cutiee TT

i’m barking so fucking loud can yall here it? my barks?!?!

okay i just listened to romance untold…moonstruck is so good are you joking. if we don’t get a music video i’m gonna be actually pissed😵

Absolutely loved her in so many works. Lovely actress to watch and so many memorable roles.

Olympia Dukakis, June 20, 1931 – May 1, 2021.

Cosmo's Moonstruck (Strike)

I simply cannot picture AI ever coming up with the delightful original screenplay (written by John Patrick Shanley) for the film Moonstruck (1987). Perhaps those in the AMPTP can heed Loretta Castorini's words and change the way they do things. What the WGA and the SAG-AFTRA are asking is not unreasonable. But then again, Loretta inherited her wisdom from her mother and Rose Castorini was a smart cookie...

Cosmo Castorini: I have no money.

Rose Castorini: You're as rich as Roosevelt. You're just cheap, Cosmo.

Hear that studio executives?

I hope the AMPTP won't wait until the moon is full and bright to make up. Even in darkness, the path forward is quite clear: compensation and safe treatment assist creativity and productivity and everyone benefits.

To those that say well, the studios could use AI and then have a writer polish it up:

moonstruck (1987) directed by norman jewison

"Loretta, I love you. Not like they told you love is, and I didn't know this either, but love don't make things nice - it ruins everything. It breaks your heart. It makes things a mess. We aren't here to make things perfect. The snowflakes are perfect. The stars are perfect. Not us. Not us! We are here to ruin ourselves and to break our hearts and love the wrong people and die. The storybooks are bullshit."