Oni Asks - Tumblr Posts

11 months ago

Hi I have a question about the centaur lore. How would centaurs react to a non-taur farting? Either a stranger in their presence or someone they've befriended?

Thanks for being so interested in my ideas! :3

That answer has two parts to it. First, we'll start with Part A: all non-taurs/humanoids.

When it comes to non-taurs farting, centaurs would generally react in non-negative ways. It all depends on context, of course, such as the personalities of those involved, whether or not it was an accident, etc. But here are common responses:

Amusement: Centaurs not only fart a lot, but they fart impressively. Centaur farts are either loud and sputtering, loud and long, or silent and SUPER long (with an audible hiss and visible flapping tail). Either way, they're usually always thick and strong-smelling, not necessarily bad but always noticeable. This means that when a non-taur/humanoid farts, some centaurs will just laugh and go, "Awww, how cute. That all you got?" They find "weaker" non-taur farts kinda silly and adorable. Imagine how you feel when you hear a dog or cat farting.

Relief: In the case of the non-taur farting intentionally because they're relaxed (or they just don't care), a lot of centaurs will assume this means the other person doesn't mind a centaur relieving themselves as well. Society at large has the taboo against farting, and most non-taurs don't have bodies that make it really hard to avoid being "rude." Farting intentionally around a centaur basically says there's nothing to worry about around you, and maybe even that you're joining them in "transgressing" this idea of politeness. Don't be surprised to hear a centaur mutter, "Oh thank god," before letting out a pent-up horse fart that puts the non-taur's to shame.

Competition: This response will usually only happen around a certain type of centaur and a certain type of non-taur. If a non-taur lets out some gas that's anywhere CLOSE to the level of a centaur's, some centaurs may find they're being... challenged. Sometimes the centaur will put a little more force into a fart than usual to outdo the other person. It's unlikely that a non-taur will win if they turn this into a fart-off, but that won't stop people from trying, nor from having fun.

A sub category to competition is interest: If a non-taur lets out a fart close to the level of a centaur's, a centaur may be genuinely interested in just what that non-taur ate (or how their body works) to make such gas possible. Not all non-taurs are comfortable answering that. The ones that are... curiously, they often become great buddies with centaurs.

Of course, there's always the matter of how a centaur would feel if a non-taur farted while riding them. If a non-taur becomes a centaur's "rider" (a special bond where the centaur will always be comfortable giving them a lift for hours on end), then the centaur wouldn't mind HOW many farts get drilled into their back. "Ride or die" has never been more appropriate.

In all other cases, the reaction is how you'd expect. Unless the centaur has a great personal fondness for farts, they'd enjoy getting farted on less than somebody farting around them. Still, they'd probably just brush it off, only really getting annoyed if the farts sounded or smelled particularly disgusting. Ultimately, it's up to the personality of the centaur involved. (In most cases, the centaur will back their ass up into their rider once they've climbed off, let out a thick one against them, and claim that now they're even.)

Now we get to Part B, the one thing that occurred to me a while ago, but that I've never brought up until now. What happens when another KIND of taur farts around a centaur?

I present you with: the minotaur. The only animal hybrid whose guts are on par with a centaur's.

Minotaurs and centaurs aren't enemies, no way. But they ARE rivals. Think of it less like warring families or classes and more like... local sports teams, the kind that meet up in the park every so often and will take breaks from trying to beat each other to get drunk and have a nice time.

When a minotaur farts around a centaur, there's a 50/50 chance a centaur will either respond to it like a competition (especially if the minotaur was trying to start one) or in encouragement (the minotaur was finally letting out something that was bothering their stomachs all day; the centaur welcomes this and joins in too).

... welp, this got very long. Hopefully I've sufficiently answered your question!


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10 months ago

Reading how centaurs deliver their side of the bet, gave me the idea of a centaur and a human that are friends getting some revenge on a non-taur (whether they are also friends and this revenge is playful or they are enemies is up to you). The centaur and the human loading up together on a bunch of gassy food, the human eating double what the centaur eats to try to be at equal level. Maybe similarly to how 2 centaurs come together to deliver scenic air, the centaur and human stand side by side and have a fart battle of sorts while they discuss they beautiful weather they're having or favorite topics as the non-taur is suffering their joint gas.

I like the way you think. ;3 Although, I do have ONE tweak I’d like to suggest. A human who tries to stuff themself so that they can be as gassy as a centaur will almost certainly strain the limits of their stomach. No creature would want to take a long walk in a state like that. Not to mention that the ass level of a human is so much lower than the ass level of a centaur.

Therefore… the centaur kindly offers to let their human friend ride on their back, with the human slumped forward so that their ass is fully pointing at the passenger behind them. Usually, adding the extra weight of a rider isn’t great when you’re also pulling a carriage, but in this case, the centaur will happily make an exception.

The human stubbornly tries to sound cocky as numerous farts rumble out of them, but their competitive remarks are said between groans of how their stomach is so goddamn full and how they’ve never been this bloated in their life. The centaur (who is the kind of friend who won’t mind when a bro farts so close to their back) is more sympathetic and doesn’t try to show off too much when they prove that their half-horse guts can easily match the human’s farts.

Thanks again for sending this ask!


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9 months ago

Fart Magic Idea: Person A knows someone (Person B) that's always gassy, whether that person is their friend or co-worker or romatic partner is up to you. A always wishes that they could conjure up a fart whenever B lets one rip but they're never able to. So they find a book of spells and finds one that can give someone gas whenever they want, they just have to think about it. So A casts the spell on themself when they know that they'll be with B. After B lets rip, A thinks about letting rip and is suddenly able to produce a blast at the same sound and power as B. B is blown away, but not to be out done and lets another blast rip. A and B spend the rest of their time together having a farting contest.

Ooh, very fun idea! That scenario immediately makes me imagine two things happening:

A) Person B inevitably gets defeated because their gas isn’t magically produced. However, when they learn how A won, B insists that A cheated. B also insists on A getting some kind of “punishment.” This can be up to you depending on what you imagine A and B’s relationship to be. If you wanna go platonic, maybe it’s making A take the blame for all of B’s farts in public for a week. If you wanna go sexual, then maybe it’s B farting directly in A’s face as much as possible whenever they’re at home.

B) A casts the spell at a super high level to ensure maximum power. Unfortunately, they didn’t know that doing this doesn’t affect the power of the resulting farts; it instead increases the spell’s duration. What should’ve been a 24-hour spell has turned into a week-long charm. And farting whenever A thinks about it is all fun and games... until A realizes that they think about farting a LOT.

A suddenly has to play a game of “don’t think about pink elephants” (except with farts) everywhere they go. Even something as minor as “this smoothie usually gives B a case of the farts” can set it off.

Thanks for sending this in!


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