Reluctant Hero. - Tumblr Posts

The Outstretched Hand

@shepherdiing

Once again, the stone thrown across the surface of the lake dropped into its depths with a loud, graceless ker-plonk. 

Lunarre had lost track of how many attempts it had been now. The repetitive nature of the activity had captured his attention, and it kept at bay the creeping painful things that lurked in his brain. 

When the hellion had first spotted the kid by the lake, one of many in the aptly named Lakehaven Heights, he had been confused. It was strange to see Sorey alone, for one, but seeing him engaged in such a solitary and silent activity intrigued Lunarre. 

At first he thought the kid was just venting frustrations by throwing stones into the water, but after a while it became clear from the changes in stance and the careful manner in which Sorey chose each stone, that he was trying to skip them. Perhaps he had a lot on his mind.

You and me both, kid.

Faced with failure for the upteenth time, Sorey only sighed and began looking around for another stone. It was at this moment that Lunarre was roused from his lethargy. Rather than make a snide internal remark, Lunarre became aware of the sudden swell of an emotion as Sorey prepared to throw again.

It was subtle, but recognisable as the same feeling he experienced as he watched Sorey armatise for the first time. 

I want him to get it, Lunarre realised. 

He had watched over Sorey and his group from the shadows ever since that fateful moment in the Great Sanctuary. Each day that passed Lunarre came closer to understanding why, yet his uncertainty over what to do grew alongside it.

While his guard was down, Lunarre realised he had his legs dangled over the tree branch he was perched on, as if to get down. He stopped himself just in time.

What the hell am I doing?!

Suddenly, a memory surfaced. 

It was afternoon, and the waters surrounding the Aquapolis were calm and clear. Lunarre and his father sat by the waterside and skipped stones. Lunarre bet he could get his stone to bounce six times and beat Pa’s record of five bounces. Pa bet he couldn’t.

Pa won.

A wave of pain coursed through his body and Lunarre grabbed his head, hissing through gritted teeth. He heard the sound of crunching feet on stones, and opened his eyes to see Sorey looking at him.

Shit. 

Lunarre turned and fled into the woods, using the branches of the trees as stepping stones. He fought against the burning sensation in his chest and the throbbing in his head. His eyes stung.

Damnit, damnit!

“You heard me, Shepherd. Help me get the tangles out of my hair. That storm messed it up somethin’ awful. C’mon. We’re friends now, right? Friends do good by one another. Riiight?”

open

❛ Y-you want me to do what? ❜

shepherdiing:

Lunarree.

Why did he get the sneaking suspicion he was being guilt tripped, in a way? Still, Sorey can’t deny that they ARE friends… sort of. Somehow. And the foxish man has a point. ❛ Okay, ❜ he responds tentatively. ❛ Do you have a brush? ❜

Lunarre whipped out a brush before the boy could finish his question. His smile widened. Gotcha.

“Be gentle,” he said. “Don’t yank it like Rose does. And for the love of peace, don’t sing any stupid songs like Lailah. That woman is obsessed with my hair. Sometimes I think she might cut it off and... I don’t want to think what.”

He shuddered. The girls of the group devolved from reasonably intelligent ladies to bickering children over his long, soft golden locks. They were either angry their hair wasn’t as luxurious, or they desperately wanted to brush it themselves - whether Lunarre liked it or not. And then there was Zaveid, who had joined the latter camp and was no help at all. It was a nightmare.

Luckily, Lunarre had managed to escape their wistful eyes and found Sorey, the perfect candidate for Assistant Brusher. Mikleo was not nearly as easy to manipulate.

Satisfied, the hellion promptly sat down and crossed his legs, waving the brush in his hand for Sorey to take.

“Here ya go. The sooner you start, the sooner it’s over.”

'Cuz I asked him to. He’s a good kid.

WHY IS SOREY BRUSHING LUNARRE’S HAIR?

divinaaquis:

“Well, even if he trusts you, I don’t. You do anything funny and you’ll regret it, you hear me?”

Mikleo eyes the kitsune with a hint of suspicion.

“Don’t take advantage of his kindness, Lunarre.”

Lunarre frowns. He knew what to expect, but that didn’t mean he had to like it. He certainly didn’t have to take it. Especially not from a high strung seraph brat.

“Look. I’ve been raised from the time I could hold a blade to know a perfect opportunity when I see one. I’ve had hundreds over the past months I’ve spent watching over you people. The great and powerful Shepherd is safe from me.”

He sighed.

“I’m no overnight saint. I know that. I’m still this. I’m still oozing malevolence. And you know what? I want to keep it that way. Not because I like it. Not because I think this is a fine and dandy way to be. But because it’s like this that I’m useful against that rabid lion bastard who wants to destroy the world. The world I live in.”

shepherdiing:

Lunarree.

Sorey just laughed awkwardly, eyeing the brush a moment. ❛ I’ll do my best to refrain from both of those. ❜ He had heard the fuss that was made over the hellion’s bounty of golden locks though the reasoning was lost on Sorey. Sure it was nice, but it was just hair. Then again, the girls tended to be pretty serious about the stuff ( a brief flashback to their ganging up on him over being innocently ignorant over barrettes and other hair accessories ). Well, at least they had something to bond over?

He took the brush and moved to sit down behind the taller being. ❛ I guess it’s pretty hard to brush out on it’s own, huh? ❜ The shepherd mused the obvious, trying to figure out just where he was support to start. Lunarre’s wild mane was even more wild than usual, knotted from the wind and the rain. Truth be told it was a little intimidating, but Sorey was prepared to tackle the task with the determination he showed towards everything in life.

Thankfully he was considerate enough to try and be as careful as he could be. The brush began to work through the hellion’s hair, fingers doing what they could to try and ease the tangles. ❛ Tell me if I hurt you. ❜

"Mm."

Part of him felt like laughing. The irony was so thick you could cut it with a butcher knife. A few months prior the Shepherd would have had no choice but to hurt him, and Lunarre would have had no qualms about a fight if it came to one. Anything to get rid of nuisances. Anything to get stronger.

Now, sitting in silence as Sorey brushed, Lunarre became painfully aware of the boy sitting directly behind him. Such a peaceful scene felt... wrong. The shame and discomfort that had gnawed him since joining the group redoubled its efforts and tore at his defences.

It made him sick. Worse, it made him think about things he shouldn’t.

Had anything really changed? Wasn’t he just right back where he had been back then?

Gripping the fabric of his trousers, the hellion forced himself to focus on the sound of the brush running through his hair. It calmed him a little, but he knew what his presence did to the pure and good.

"Is it really alright for you to be so close to someone like me?” he asked quietly. “I could corrupt you. Who’ll purify the world then?”

shepherdiing:

❛ There, look, that cloud looks just like a pork bun! ❜

[Takes calming breaths like Lailah taught him to]

“...Huh. So it does.”

He really is an innocent kid - carefree as those damn clouds.

Lunarre lifts his eyes to the sky, using a hand to shield them from the sun’s glare. He never had time for such happy-go-lucky activities, so it takes a few minutes for his imagination to kick in. He points at a misshapen cloud.

“Hey - that one looks like a sweetfish. A damn fat one.”

shepherdiing:

Sorey’s gaze swings to where Lunarre points, having to squint and tilt his head a bit. ❛ A very fat one, ❜ he agrees after a moment of consideration before looking about at the rest of the puffy shapes in the sky. Nudging Lunarre he gestures to another one ( tickled that the hellion was playing along ).

❛ That one’s a pie! I wonder what flavor? Man… why do the clouds have to look like food it’s making me hungry. ❜

Lunarre can’t help but chuckle. He could have told the kid the cloud looked like Heldalf’s arse and Sorey would have agreed with him in his good-natured way.

“Same here. Ya know, I used to get into these crazy eating competitions with Boss - I mean, Rose - a few years back. I’d take her on again if... you know, we’re ever at an inn or...”

The hellion finds himself getting almost sheepish as he trails off. He isn’t comfortable talking about future days with the group so casually, not least because of how tenuous his position within it is. He’s grateful he’s lasted this long, all things considered. 

Lunarre, who was sitting beside Sorey eating his own lunch, took the shrimp from the boy’s fingers and bit off the tiny crustacean’s head with his teeth. He then handed it back to Sorey.

“There ya go. No face.”

open

❛ I… I can’t do this. ❜ Sorey looked away, rubbing his arm. He squeezed his eyes shut and huffed a little, looking quite distraught. ❛ It’s got a face! How am I expected to eat something that’s looking at me!? ❜

Shimp was definitely not for him.

“Oh come on, don’t be such a baby, it’s fine! See, I solved your problem for you. If you want I can do the same with the other shrimp.”

snickering-kitsune:

Lunarre, who was sitting beside Sorey eating his own lunch, took the shrimp from the boy’s fingers and bit off the tiny crustacean’s head with his teeth. He then handed it back to Sorey.

“There ya go. No face.”

❛ On second thought, I’ve lost my appetite. ❜

he’s traumatized.

shepherdiing:

Sorey knew the oddness of the situation, he wasn’t going to sit there and deny that this was… wrong on quite a few levels. To think the shepherd would be brushing a hellion’s hair of all things, it was downright ludicrous. A circumstance that shouldn’t be and yet here they were. He was gentle as he could be, brow knit in careful concentration as he worked through knots. The fox-man’s muscles went stiff and the shepherd could feel the pulse beat of malevolence right on his chest. Creeping up his throat.

❛ I’m sure another shepherd would come along in that worst case scenario. ❜ Was it truly alright for him to associate with Lunarre like this? As if they were friends — companions? Hardly so, their very roles were against each other, but Sorey was not so easily dissuaded.

❛ You’re always free to leave, you know. I won’t stop you if you feel like you need to, but I also think that given enough time I can help you with… you know. The whole hellion thing. Just look at you, you’re not trying to chew my face off! I’d already call that an improvement. ❜ Though Lunarre may not be able to see it Sorey was grinning, waving the brush about for emphasis before returning it to the mane of hair.

The notion of leaving the group gnawed at Lunarre like the teeth of leeches and he could not dislodge them. It was clear to him now; leaving was no longer an option to consider, though it rightfully existed.

“No,” he said, more forcibly than he had intended. Calming himself, he continued: “I don’t want to leave. I can’t. I can’t be alone again - not like this, not with these thoughts...” Lunarre hugged his body, sickened by his own vulnerability but desperate to push down his own pulsing malevolence. 

“They’ll eat me alive.”

The offer of help stopped his descent, and Lunarre could suddenly feel the ground underneath him, the breeze and sun on his skin, the sound of the brush raking through his hair. It was a shock, like waking from a nightmare, but Lunarre could listen to Sorey’s words well enough.

Even now, the kid’s boundless capacity for forgiveness and empathy baffled Lunarre. He could hardly imagine a future in which this would ever stop being the case. But in moments like this Lunarre could almost believe in something intangible, that which Sorey and his friends fought for.

No, he wanted to believe in it, because somewhere lay the peace and contentment Lunarre yearned for, deep in his corrupted heart, where he knew that his strength was not the answer he sought, but only the undoing of it. The family and companionship that had so far eluded him suddenly didn’t seem so far away. It terrified and exhilarated the hellion in equal measure.

Even someone like me... even weak, could I...?

Lunarre’s reverie was broken by Sorey’s joke, and the hellion spluttered a laugh. With nothing in place to hold back, his lips curled into a smile. So the kid got his sense of humour. Lunarre was the last person who would have guessed. 

The grip of his uncertainty, shame and fear loosened, and the intensity of his malevolence ebbed along with it.

Without thinking, Lunarre turned around and put a hand on the boy’s head and patted it.

“You’re good kid.”

shepherdiing:

Sorey, dense as he was at times, did manage to pick up on the awkwardness that came from Lunaree as he spoke. That certain sheepish hesitation, as if he wasn’t quite sure if he was saying something out of line or not. The shepherd didn’t draw any attention towards it, instead canting his head to the side and smiling.

❛ That sure sounds like something and I don’t know if that something is a good thing, but it’s definitely a thing I’d like to see. No offense, but my money is on Rose. She can really pack it away. ❜

Lunarre laughed. This kid didn’t have a cynical bone in his body. Suddenly the hellion felt lighter in himself, and he wagged a mischievous finger.

“Boss is good, but don’t underestimate my gluttony! I’ll make sure your money goes to waste!”

The Outstretched Hand

[Cont. from here]

@shepherdiing

Great, Just great. Now the brat was following him. Through the throbbing in his ears Lunarre could hear the Shepherd calling after him. Lunarre increased his speed, surging through the trees as he fought the agony in his body.

Suddenly the forest came to an abrupt end, giving way to fields as far as the eye could see. Cutting through them was a great river, engorged from the previous nights of heavy rain. The clouds were beginning the darken overhead. 

Using the last branch as a springboard, Lunarre jumped high and landed on the bank of the river, panting. The river was the only barrier in his way, and there was no getting around it. He had to cross.

As he readied himself for the jump, he heard his father’s laughter.

“Better luck next time, son. Your old man still has you beat.”

A fresh wave of agony brought a howl from the hellion’s throat. He couldn’t let the brat see him. He couldn’t…

Summoning all the strength he could muster to his legs, Lunarre leapt. 

The moment his feet left the ground he knew he had misjudged the distance, but it was too late. Blinded by pain, Lunarre plummeted into the freezing water.

Oh his shame, the shameful secret he had managed to keep hidden from the Scattered Bones for the two years he was with them: he could not swim a stroke. Since childhood his survival had depended partly on the fish the rivers and lakes could provide - venturing into their waters for pleasure was a luxury Lunarre had never been able to afford. 

When Lunarre met the Scattered Bones, this became a weakness he was determined to hide. And he did.

How useless all that was. Thrusting his head above the surface of the raging waters, the hellion gasped for air.

Lunarre’s legs kicked helplessly as he was dragged away by the current. The river pulled him under time and time again, and each time Lunarre desperately pulled himself back up. There was no way he could reach the other side; it was too far, and the current was too strong. His limbs were aching, his lungs were about to burst, his head was pounding. The river pulled him under again, and Lunarre knew his strength would only allow him one last chance for air.

Coming up again, Lunarre screamed at the top of his lungs. 

“PA! PA, HELP ME PLEASE! I DON’T WANNA DIE!”