So Not Cannon - Tumblr Posts

Tuesday 7:44 pm

you: hey it’s me from the book shop lol

tom: Good evening.

Tuesday 7:50 pm

you: hey remember the guy we saw at the bookstore and i asked for his number

lestrange: yeah what about

malfoy: si

you: 1 Image Attached

lestrange: typing…

malfoy: ‘good evening’ okay dracula lmaooo

you: BYE

lestrange: ask for nudes

voldemort’s villain redemption arc (t.m.r.)

“now say sorry”

“absolutely not.” tom refused, crossing his arms and turning away like a child.

you looked at harry and he shook his head at you like he was saying it was not going to happen.

“tom.” you repeat, giving him one more chance. he turned his head slightly to look at you. then at harry. then at you again.

“alright,” he sighs, putting down his arms in resignation. “i’m sorry for trying to kill you.”

“what am i to be sorry for?” harry said defensively when you looked at him expectedly.

“true true…” you nod, “now hug it out.”

“what?” they say in unison. the one time they have ever been on the same side.

“you heard me”

taking in a breath, swallowing his pride riddle walks up to the boy. he could never say no to you. walking up to an uncomfy looking potter, awkwardly giving him a stiff hug. he gives a robotic pat on the back.

tom riddle is in the hospital wing (t.m.r.)

“no not there,” you hint. avery moves his hand and hovers his quill over another free space on his paper.

“no” moves again.

“nope…no…not there either- you didn’t study your constellations did you?” you confront. the slytherin boy redraws from his mapping and shakes his head shamefully.

“it’s okay, take a look at mine.” you say patiently, digging in your bag. before you can place your parchment on the table, the sound of panting comes into ear shot.

and it gets louder. and louder, and louder. until a flustered malfoy comes to a running halt at the head of your table.

“t…” he exhales, leaning down on his knees. “t-to…” he puts up his pointer finger as he catches his breath.

you and avery look at each other curiously.

“speak, will you?” lestrange pushes impatiently, wanting to get back to his divination assignment.

“tom riddle is in the hospital wing.” he finally says.

“okay and?”

“what? is he okay?”

the two other boys give you a quirked eyebrow. they questioned your reaction, since you “held no concern for the arrogant, stupidly charming prodigy”.

“potions accident,” abraxas addressed your question, ignoring his other housemates’ response, “first year blew up her makeup assignment while he was doing a side project after school.”

at this the other three all gave an equally concerned expression.

that could not be good. for anyone.

“well,” the blonde clapped his hands together. his tone holding a positive tone, a contrast to the news he had just delivered. “you should visit him (y/l/n).”

you rolled your eyes at his mischievousness. you had 99 problems, and apparently asking abraxas malfoy to keep a secret is indeed one of them.

“it’s fairy flu season. the matron won’t let unnecessary visitors in unless you’re escorting someone in.” avery said honestly, earning a not so subtle stomp on the foot by lestrange.

“oh well there you go, looks like i can’t go.” you smile innocently, mentally thanking avery for his obliviousness.

“no, no, i have an idea.” lestrange put down his quill, you and malfoy looking at each other at your friends sudden undivided attention.

“what is it-“ before avery could finish, a fist goes flying and his head whips to the side. a gasp escaped your lips and malfoy’s jaw dropped to the floor.

“there’s your ticket in,” lestrange says shaking his hand. avery sits up revealing a bloody nose that was sure to be broken or at least fractured. “quidditch accident.”

Friday 8:46 pm

you: so tom isn't short for anything

tom: I do not believe so.

you: what's your full name then

Friday 8:48 pm

lestrange: how's it going with tommy boy?

you: good, we’re talking rn actually

malfoy: ss? 👀

Friday 8:48 pm

tom: Tom Marvolo Riddle.

you: 1 Image Attached

Friday 8:50 pm

malfoy: hellooo?

lestrange: you think they're sending booty pics or something

you: what no, I literally just sent the screenshot maybe its loading

malfoy: bestie I hate to tell you this

Friday 8:52 pm

tom: I do not understand.

your comment section

averybody.loves.avery 🔥🔥🤩

tom.m.riddle Shut up, Avery.

lestranger_things go off then i guess 🙄

tom.m.riddle She will ‘go off’ if she wishes to.

1_andonly_malfoy BESTIE YESS ‼️

tom.m.riddle I am her only best friend.

absolutely_nott_ fineee 😍

tom.m.riddle I will hex you Nott.

walburga-black 😍😍

tom.m.riddle Valid.

Masterlist 🦑

hey sexy. so sorry you ran across my writing blog, but welcome. come inside, the water's nice.

*not-so-serious, not-so-cannon character writing. don’t come at me lol. ooc commercial breaks.

Started: 08/09/2021

Last updated: 01/31/2022

oldest-newest fics (writing improves as you go down haha)

tom riddle

blurbs/fics/imagines

exposing riddle part two

where you expose riddle and his not so tom riddle like hobbies

exposing YOU part two-(hp characters with phones)

where tom has been exposing you long before you have been uncovering his extracurriculars

no texting in the library (+slytherin gang)

where the boys help you initiate conversation with the fine transfer student (hp characters with phones)

now say sorry (+harry potter)

where tom can't say no to you

tom riddle is in the hospital wing (+slytherin gang)

where the boys make an excuse for you to see your crush

back to the future 

where you show tom his future if he keeps acting a fool

but those two hate each other (+slytherin gang)

where (y/n)’s besties investigate who she’s been ditching them for (hp characters with phones)

nice try, now move aside malfoy (+slytherin gang)

where you ask the boys to keep tom from seeing you after an anxious moment

abraxas tell you that? (+abraxas malfoy) part dos (+slytherin gang)

where jelly tom still holds affections for you and maybe you do too

kobe!

where rosier is being a chad and tom is not having it

joe mumma

where tom is like ugh fine i’ll help reader out ig 🙄 (+slytherin gang)

got beef?

where calm cool collected husband tom and a son that takes after his mama. lots of face punching in this one.

what a waste of a monologue...

where reader decides to be bold but is surprised with tom being even bolder (+chad rosier)

the hangover

where tom says “story time: kidnapped with my enemy?”

happy christmas tom

where tom is being a lil grinch

diary of a witchy kid

where you end up with tom marvel riddles diary (+slytherin gang)

instant family

where dad tom dad tom dad tom

super spyyyy (short spy/assassin au)

where tom misuses a modern saying

texts (+slytherin gang)

good evening

where you text the cute guy from the book shop

screenshot?

where you send a screenshot to the wrong person

finsta/twitter

comment section (+slytherin gang)

where tom decides to reply to everyone who commented on your ig post

rip that dobby ayyy

where tom is a boomer when it comes to text abbreviations

draco malfoy

blurbs/fics/imagines

smell my shirt

where you make malfoy smell you

my friend hugh

where draco swearsss he can work at a minimum wage job (hp characters with cell phones)

texts (+slytherin boys)

ellen degeneres

where malfoy texts the wrong chat

finsta

comment section

where dracos followers comment on his thirst trap

other

group chats

but first, coffee (+slytherin boys)

where theo shares his morning with the rest of the groupchat

Wednesday 2:45 pm

draco: mum can you get me more purple shampoo while you’re out pls ❤️

you: umm

blaise: i freaking knew it dude

nott: wrong chat

crabbe: sorry i haven’t been texting guys i got my tablet taken away

adrian: it was fake?!

>> dobby has left the chat >>

you: so much is happening right now

Wednesday 3:06 pm

draco: so no?

but those two hate each other (t.m.r.)

malfoy: i dee heru

nott: what?

malfoy: i seer herj

nott: english malfoy

malfoy: I SAID I SEE HER

incoming call from nott

abraxas huffed in annoyance and accepted the call. he balanced the phone between his shoulder and ear, immediately bringing both hands back to the broom handle.

“yes?!”

“me-oww someone is in a feisty mood.” the blonde rolled his eyes.

“well it’s kind of hard texting while flying 300 feet in the sky!”

“tsk tsk,” nott tutted, “well, what do you see?”

“umm…” malfoy levitated the binoculars to his eyes. “I see (y/n)….and….AND RIDDLE!” he screamed, nearly dropping both devices.

“what?!” not said equally surprised.

“wait is that malfoy?” lestrange sounded from the background. “didn’t i tell you guys to leave (y/n) alone? if she doesn’t want to study with us she doesn’t want to study with us.”

“so sneaking around with tom riddle is better than hanging out with us?”

“what?! those two hate each other—put the phone on speaker.” lestrange instructs.

“are they dueling or fighting, malfoy? because i will hex that curly headed f…”

but abraxas wasn’t listening. he was too intrigued by the sight of tom and his friend being in the same room not trying to tear each other’s heads off.

“they’re talking…civilly…” he says to himself, squinting into the binoculars. (y/n) said something, and tom seemed to disagree, crossing his arms over his chest.

“talking?” nott asked in confusion, snapping the broom flyer out of his trance.

the (h/c) girl turned away, only for riddle to grab your arm and pull you toward him, connecting your guy’s lips.

“OH MY MERLIN THEYRE KISSING!”

“WHAT?!” but there was no time to elaborate.

an odd sound flew past abraxas’ right ear. then it flew the opposite direction past his left ear. it was the sound of flapping.

it was a bat.

“they’re kissing??!!” his friends exclaimed.

“whaa-“ he swerved on his broom, swatting the animal away. his binoculars dropping in the process making him curse.

“abraxas what is happening?” reinhard asked.

“its…it’s…a bat!” he said in between swats.

the two boys on the other end heard the creatures shrieking, and their friend’s too as a matter of fact.

“it’s pecking at me now!” the boy squealed, trying to sneak a squint at the window again only to find them gone.

“it’s probably the pumpkin pasties in your pocket!” nott spoke loudly over the commotion.

“what?!”

“i put them in your pocket in case you got hungry after practice!” he explained, earning a judgmental look from reinhard.

after what seemed like hours of wrestling, malfoy was finally able to retrieve the pastry and throw it like a frisbee, the bat chasing it like an obedient dog.

letting out a sign in relief, which only lasted for a second, his hand slipped forward causing him to lose balance.

caught off guard, abraxas screamed his way down the 300 feet. his friends on the other end hearing his cry get quieter and louder. quieter and louder, as him and the phone fell in and out of sync. the slytherin began to say his final prayers.

“dear merlin, or sky, or constellations, or whatever my grandparents believe in. i’m sorry i put hair dissolve in avery’s shampoo and for being a shitty quidditch player. please let my parents know i-“

by miracle, malfoys body came to a half before his face could meet the earth. his body levitating inches above the ground.

when he looked up to thank his savior, he was met with an expressionless tom holding his wand out and a disappointed (y/n).

“well hello, tom. come here often?” he grinned, before his body hit the ground with a thud.

comment on theedracomalfoy’s post!

📍you what’s @ tho 👀

pinned by theedracomalfoy

theedracomalfoy 😉😉❤️

itsyaboyblaise boi if you don’t put on a shirt

notty_theo that’s zaddy 😍🔥

adrian.pucey1 damn bro you make me want suck your…nvm but you look good

this comment has been reported by dracosmomsgotitgoingon_

feat.pansy_ how do i unsee this 🕳👩🏻‍🦯

adrians_spam_ it was a joke mrs. malfoy i swear! @dracosmomsgotitgoingon_

chosen_one_harry✅ 🥱🥱😴

harry potter ✅ @chosen_one_harry

rest in peace dobby ❤️

💬 replies

hermione granger @ hermiones_jeans

rip my friend 😔🙏🏽

tom riddle @orphan_annie_but_angry

LOL :(

you @you

tom what

ron weasley @ whatsronwithyou

dawg

tom riddle @orphan_annie_but_angry

* Lots Of Love

you @you

aw baby no…

albus dumbledore ✅ @dumbledore_official

dumbass

nice try, now move aside malfoy (t.m.r.)

warning: mentions of anxiety

walburga placed the glass of water she got for you on your bed side table. the gentle clink making you open your eyes.

“thank you,” you say quietly, giving her a thankful smile. your roommate gave a nod. a small response, but it was how the Black heiress showed her reserved affections.

wrapping the blanket around you, you turned onto your other side, back facing the door. the coolness of the previously unoccupied side of the bed satisfying your warm body.

meanwhile on the other side of the wall, your other friends worried about you.

“bad day,” lestrange tossed the paper ball up, “it happens,” he shrugged, catching it mid air. avery sat against the opposite wall fiddling with his fingers, wanting to believe his friends calm reassurance. malfoy on the other hand was pacing up and corridor outside your room, guilt bubbling in his chest.

“i don’t know mate, maybe it was my fault. it was me that pushed her to try out for the team, even though she didn’t want to.” he said with furrowed brows. the scene of her running off the field mid game replaying in his mind.

“nah, wasn’t your fault. (y/n) is extraordinary on the broom, she makes an exceptional quidditch player,” nott cut in, dropping the pencil he was using as a mustache from his upper lip. “it was rosier that yelled at her even though she was doing exactly what he said.”

“rosier did what?” all four heads whipped to the new guest to their worry party. rip rosier ayyy.

“riddle,” lestrange greeted, catching the paper ball and tossing it beside him. tom gave a curt nod.

“lestrange,” he acknowledged in return, “nott, malfoy, avery.” avery looked at his peers nervously.

“what brings you here at this fine hour?” nott asks.

“i should be asking you the same thing nott,” the salazar descendant lifts an eyebrow, “in fact, why are you four outside of my girlfriend’s dormitory? was there a sleepover i was not invited to?”

it took a long minute for the rest of the slytherins to realize the joke.

tom riddle made a joke.

a nervous laugh reputed from avery, the rest following him, hoping that riddle had only wanted to make them laugh then leave. now that’s funny.

“speaking of which, i would like to see her-“ immediately abraxas grabs onto the door knob, preventing the boy inches taller than him from twisting it.

don’t let him see me like this, you specifically told them.

“what is the meaning of this?”

“(y/n) is not available for the time being,” reinhard pulls the attention away from malfoy.

“and why is that?” suspicion rises in toms voice as he straightens up his back to look down on the boys.

“menstruation.”

“diarrhea.” avery and nott say at the same time. they look at each other.

“diarrhea.”

“menstruation.”

tom looks between the two expressionless, giving reinhard and abraxas one more look over before turning back to his main purpose.

“nice try, now move aside malfoy.” he gracefully pushes the blonde aside and opens the door, making him cringe at his failure. lestrange shakes his head in disappointment as avery and nott begin to argue like children.

“diarrhea really?”

“it was the first thing that came to mind because of last nights chicken.”

the sound of the door creaking and footsteps ascending made you roll over.

“avery i said- tom!” you screamed in surprise, rolling back and away from his sight quickly, only to have you falling onto the wooden floor.

“my dear, are you alright?” suddenly he was by your side, lifting your chin and checking for any injuries.

“yes, just a light fall.” you reassure, sitting up properly. toms hands never leaving your face.

“now why have you been hiding in your room all afternoon?” the question you dreaded falling from his full lips. the memories coming flooding back cause you to groan into your hands, negative thoughts attacking your mind at once.

what will he think of you? weak? sensitive? getting overwhelmed by the heavy stares of all the other experienced players, watching your every move. no one feels the need to isolate after something like that, right?

“hey, hey we don’t have to talk about it, love. it’s alright.” he comforts. taking in a deep breath, you remove your hands from your face and stare into his beautiful brown eyes.

it’ll be okay

it was finally time to let the wall down.

tom has been supportive in every way. he may not always show emotion or how he’s feeling, but he always made you feel safe. with your challenges shouldn’t be any different.

“i know, but i’d like to.”

he smiles at your response looking at you proudly, bringing your head forward for a kiss at the root of your hair.

❤️ my sexies that struggle with mental health i see you and love you keep going! ❤️

full vid creds to owner.

Thursday 7:37 am

theo: y’all not me blowing up the girls restroom 7 am 😭

draco: boy what did you eat 💀

blaise: that’s nasty bro you’re going to azkaban

myrtle: i literally died all over again thanks 😐

goyle: bubble guts do be real tho 😳

you: wait why the girls restroom

you usually weren’t one to go through peoples things, especially the possessions of someone as scary and powerful as alexein malfoy. but you had a point to prove, and it was that your fiancee and his father were in fact not scheming against you— a ridiculous thought only tom would come up with.

maybe he was still upset over the forced break up, or maybe he was extremely bitter over the fact that you chose your family’s honor over him, and abraxas malfoy of all people. you didn’t know. but you couldn’t help but to believe in him a little. tom riddle proved himself to be one of the most intelligent people you knew, before and during your two years together. so maybe a hunch, as silly as it may seem, may be worth looking into, not that you would find anything.

you wouldn’t let him know that of course.

you were in alexeins office to find your grandfathers ring, a family heirloom you inherited along with the rest of the family possessions.

“have you not noticed that the ring has gone missing since the engagement party?”

“tom i don’t have time for this right now”

“you won’t have time for anything once they take all that you have and keep you prisoner.” you turn around to face him. anger provoked by his harshness.

“something suspicious is happening, and i don’t want you to get hurt, my love.” tucking an out of place piece of hair behind your ear.

my love. 🤨🚨

“i knew it.” you close the last desk drawer. no ring in sight, just stacks on stacks of papers. and creepy dark objects for decor. can’t forget those.

“what are you doing?”

“ahh- drugs!” you scream at the sudden presence behind you, making you twirl around. “i mean-tom? i should be asking you the same thing.”

he doesn’t respond immediately, but instead stares at you. his eyes study your face like he’s trying to memorize every little detail, making you want to squirm.

you open your mouth to say something, but close it as he takes a step forward. looking down at you, he places a strand of hair behind your ear.

no, not today. as if reading your mind, he speaks before you can try again.

“the ring is in the safe.” you blink back into realty, toms eyes focused on something behind you.

“wh-how do you know?” you follow him toward the box hidden behind dark artifacts.

“during the summer, abraxas and i would accompany alexein to collect artifacts.” hovering his hand over the lock, it twists and turns to a click. “the important ones go in here.” you looked at the back of his head in confusion.

“it’s only an heirloom, it’s not dark…” the lack of confidence makes it sound like you’re trying to convince yourself more than your ex boyfriend.

“abraxas tell you that?” he huffs, but before he could open the door of the safe, the door knob of the study twists. within a blink of an eye, the safe is locked again and toms arms are around you. he gracefully pulls you underneath the wooden desk, hand over your head protectively.

two pairs of dress shoes click against the dark flooring.

“do not disappoint me, abraxas. the family name is on your shoulders.” the older malfoy uncaps the silver family crested lighter, igniting his cigar.

your mouth instinctively opens out of panic. toms hand comes flying over your mouth, looking you in the eyes and placing a finger on his lips.

you waited for your soon-to-be’s response, unable to see his facial reaction.

“what about…?” the young man trailed off, immediately regretting asking about you. immediately regretting ever meeting you. abraxas should’ve told his father you were a muggle born when he asked about you, maybe then you wouldn’t be in this mess.

your eyes find tom’s, but looking off listening intently, waiting for the older Malfoys response.

“who? ah yes, the girl. well…”

the man takes a long drag from his cigar before holding it out to his son.

“i suppose she won’t be needed after an heir is secured” not an ounce of emotion or remorse can be traced in alexiens voice as he exhaled the tobacco smoke.

your eyes widen and riddles hand tightens around your mouth gently, afraid your reaction would give you two away. unknowingly a tear falls, catching toms attention from the conversation between the father and son as it lands on his fingers. without thinking, he brings your head forward and rests your forehead against his. and you don’t pull away.

full vid creds to owner.

my friend hugh (d.l.m.)

a long long time ago someone talked about draco working at starbucks and hating it. that was my inspo for this, so shout out to that user ❤️

“hugh janus.” the blonde repeats for the second time. he double checks the name on the drink.

“well im not bloody blind… online order for hugh janus! HUGE ANUS— oh bollocks kill me now.” draco turns back to the kitchen, too irritated to be embarrassed by the laughing customers that would hopefully be gone by the time he returned from break.

draco: ha ha very funny zabini

malfoy tossed his employee hat onto the table along with his green apron.

theo: what happened

blaise: happy first day bby

draco: 1 Image Attached

theo: HUGH JANUS

the following half hour was just as bad; hectic, busy, and annoying.

“aaaand i’ll have a cake pop”

“alright,” draco clicked around the screen.

“no a brownie-“

“ok-“

“no both!” the girl in her early teenage years clapped. malfoy simply gave her a blank look and and processed her payment. his annoyed stare never leaving her face as he did, making her scurry off in intimidation after she grabbed her receipt.

he was sure to put her sticker order over the logo on her drink to ruin her snapchat post.

“jake we need you at the window,” the guy who trained draco brushed by his shoulder. in fairness, he forgot his name too.

“you must be the new guy,” the girl working at the window took off her headset, “here you go, i’ll be back in 15!”

the slytherin took the worn out device and stared at it. ooh chile the ghetto, he thought. it was still warm too.

he had no idea what he was doing. draco was only trained for half an hour prior to his first shift and it was for cashier and handling mobile orders. so for the first ten customers, he gave them whatever drinks that came to the “ready” counter first. the other employee can deal with the complaints when she returns from break, that is if the customers are willing to get back in the long line.

as he served the orders in a panicked fashion, he couldn’t help but feel bad for all the times he criticized and made fun of minimum wage workers. he would definitely rethink how he would treat the people he would usually yell at or threaten whenever he lost patience. or not, who knows.

“draco?” a voice sobered him from his frantic state. he leaned forward out the window and squinted at the driver.

“pansy?”

“merlin, had no idea you worked here. or worked in general…”

“yeah blaise and theo bet on how long i’d last,” he explained slightly embarrassed at her slipped comment. grabbing the vanilla bean frap, he handed it to her.

“oh this isn’t what i ordered, but how is it working here? i’ve been think of-“

“girl don’t!” pansy’s eyes widened at the sudden emotion. “they have me slaving here. don’t do it.” he warned, stepping back to close the window sliding door. turn on his heel, malfoy took in a breath when he was met face with the shift leader.

•••

“couldn’t have been that bad…right?” you look down at draco who’s head is in your lap, as you play with his hair under the book you’re reading.

“apparently five people got allergic reactions because i gave them the wrong drinks.”

“oh…” you say awkwardly, suppressing your laugh.

“was one of the people hugh?”

summary: early on in their relationship, reader is still a little shy around thomas thee stallion.

“may i see your notes ?” tom asked as he began to pack up. you stopped dead in your tracks, caught off guard.

“um…”

“i missed the last part she mentioned about the life line when palm reading.” he reasoned.

your divinations professor sipped her tea in the background, knowing dang well her lesson was not on palm reading that day. but you didn’t know that, and neither did the head boy. you were off doodling, while he was distracted staring at you from across the class.

“ah, i didn’t write any…” you excused, avoiding eye contact.

“don’t be silly, i saw you jotting down notes,” he grinned slightly, then stopped when he realized what he said.

professor poured more tea into her cup.

wanting to move past his slip up, he gently grabbed your books from you, hoisting them up on top of his. why were you acting so suspicious?

the salazar heir took your parchment sticking out from its spot wedged into your divinations book.

“oh” he said awkwardly, eyeing your page sized sketch of a cat.

“yeah…” you say embarrassed.

“well at least add some whiskers”

kobe! (t.m.r.)

summary: what can i say, tomothy shablagoo hates quidditch

“i hate quidditch”

“i know”

“i despise it”

“i know tom, but we’re here to support our friends,” you remind.

tom huffs in defeat and sits back, watching the the slytherin players get into their positions, eyeing their hufflepuff opponents.

“ladies and gentlemen…” the commentator introduces the two teams, each corresponding house cheering for their side.

“nott! malfoy!” you cheer, standing up and applauding like a hyped mom.

“must you be so loud?” tom looked up at you in distaste. you pause your clapping and turn to him with furrowed brows, flicking his forehead.

“did you just flick me?” he says with disbelief.

“shhh it’s starting!” your hand grabs onto his face, tom watching through your splayed fingers.

the beginning was not very climatic. there was a lot of dodging and good defense on both ends. but as the game progressed, hufflepuff began to grow tired, while slytherin on the other hand was getting fired up. using this to their advantage, your house scored 10 points.

“yes! let’s goo!!” you cheered. the abrupt movement of your arms knocking toms hot dog out of his hand mid-bite.

he crossed his arms in disappointment. but he couldn’t be too mad because of how happy you were.

eventually one of the slytherin chasers got attacked by a bludger, causing him to fold like a tortilla, falling down into the pit. in response, rosier was called to replace him.

you rolled your eyes.

you prayed rosier wouldn’t get any playing time. if there was anyone who couldn’t take a hint it was him. he constantly flirted with you despite your disinterest before you and riddle got together. even then, he would still remind you how he would be waiting for you. not when tom was around of course. he wasn’t that bold. your boyfriend never found out because you begged your witnessing friends not to tell him because merlin knows what would happen to the boy.

the game proceeded as normal, until rosier spotted you in the crowd.

now this was trouble.

you snuck a glance at tom who was playing tictactoe with a first year that also seemed to not have interest in the game. maybe he wouldn’t notice.

“this ones for you (y/n)!” toms head immediately shot up. people were looking around for who he was talking to.

“oh no…” you groaned, hiding your face in embarrassment. the little devil winked at you.

instant death wish.

“did he just-“

rosier confidently pulled his arm back, launching the quaffle forward toward the goal. “kobe!” the spectators hold their breath in anticipation.

only to miss.

in response, an awkward silence blanketed the crowd. nott tried to cover his snicker with his gloved hand only to receive a smack to the back of his head by malfoy.

the wrong day to be bold rosier.

despite the weight of the second hand embarrassment of the whole stadium, he still had the audacity to take another glance at you…and your upset boyfriend.

“now i really hate quidditch”

tom stood up from his seat and grabbed your hand, pulling you up with him. he gripped his wand and within a blink of an eye you two disappeared from the stands.

rip kobe we miss you black mamba❤️

full vid creds to owner

summary: thomas the train discovers you have a celebrity crush

“water is not wet” you deadpan, not looking up from your herbology assignment.

“yes it is! it’s not dry is it?” nott pushes, “lestrange, help me out here”

“nope” he responds, turning the page of his book.

“you two always to gang up on-“

“(y/l/n).” tom steps into the common room. “a word.”

the two boys look at each other. lestrange gives you a knowing look, shuts his book and gets up to leave.

“i-uh, have to water my cat” nott excuses himself. you watch them two leave in betrayal.

“yes my liege?” you say mockingly, however it seems that your best friend wasn’t in the playful mood.

“what is the meaning of this?” he asks, a bit angry. your eyebrows knit together in confusion as you squint at his phone screen. a recent shirtless selfie of your celebrity crush displayed.

“yeah that’s ____, what about him?”

“read the top comment” he exhales sharply at your nonchalance. you take a closer look, your eyes go front squinting to wide open.

you i’m sobbing and throbbing

“oh my-“

“yes and that’s not all. you comment on every post” he rages, turning the screen back to him and clicking around.

“____ you’re so hot, have my children”

“i am currently ovulating”

“oh no where did my clothes go?”

“do you need a fire alarm because i can scream?” he lists. your face turning a shade of crimson darker after every comment. after sobering from the initial embarrassment, you come to a realization.

“everyone comments those things. why does it matter tom?” he stops reading and looks caught off guard.

“i-i just think that it’s not appropriate-“ this may have been the first time you witnessed him fumbled with his words. what happened to the collected, calculated slytherin prefect?

a smile creeps onto your face.

“riddle, are you jealous?”

abraxas tell you that? part dos (t.m.r.)

ah shiii here we go again

this is a short prequel to “abraxas tell you that?” which is why its under tom x reader

“what exactly are we looking for again?” nott lazily lifted various items in the bedroom; pillows, books...the lamp. in contrast, you were flipping things over and searching like a mad man.

“the ring”

“what ring?” Avery asked a volume too loud, earning a harsh shush from his housemates. he muttered a sorry, continuing flipping through the pages of alexein malfoys various texts.

“its a-” you glance at nott, who gives you a hesitant look. Avery looked up to abraxas, everyone knew that. you didn't want to be the one to ruin that image for him by exposing the suspicions around the Malfoy family. “just a ring that was misplaced”

the sound of footsteps approaching leave you three frozen like deer in headlights. nott grabs onto you and Avery, ushering you two into a nearby closet. with a flick of your wand, the bedroom restores.

“now from my understanding, you and miss (y/l/n) have decided to split.” 

alexein. 

“that would be correct.” a familiar voice accompanies, causing you to fidget. you strain your eyes to look between diagonal wooden shutters of the closet door. tom and mr malfoy stand head to head. you can feel the tenseness through the door. 

“very good, tom. you have always been like a second son to me. your loyalties will be rewarded.” 

Avery takes in a sharp breath out of nervousness. nott warns him with an elbow to the ribs. unfortunately, it was too late. though the platinum blonde was momentarily distracted by lighting his cigar, his younger counterpart took notice of the noise. he squinted, and made eye contact with you through the space you were peeping through. you sat back immediately with an inaudible gasp. 

caught in 4k.

“however,” alexein exhaled, “there are other matters we must discuss. one regarding a ring-” he pauses at the sudden noise. your sleeve flies over your mouth and nose, and nott follows suit with the collar of his shirt. Avery sits in the corner guilty, mouthing ‘sorry’, attempting to fan his fart.

alexein pretends to not hear it, and dismisses it. tom fights to keep a straight face, his eyes a bit wide, plotting ten million ways to murder avery.

“abraxas has informed me about your recent interest in dark magic, and I was curious to know if you have read anything on-” the older man is once again interrupted by another gust of Averys nervousness. and this time it is too long for him to quickly talk over. 

it lasts for a good five seconds, fluctuating from high and lower pitches. you hold your arm tighter around your face, and nott sinks his heads completely into his shirt while punching the boy next to him repeatedly. you can see tom’s fists ball tightly as he eyes the closet door with pure hatred. 

“my apologies sir,” tom painfully admits.

“perhaps we shall continue this later on,” malfoy clears his throat awkwardly. “and of course tom, don't hesitate to make yourself at home and use the bathroom.”

joe mumma (t.m.r.)

more chad rosier, can possibly be prequel to kobe! idek rosier like that but i decided to just make him a basura character. |tom x reader. hiding reader trope-my favorite. some slytherin gang action.| possible warnings: implications of chad rosier being a creep, abraxas having a booty so big lord have mercy.

“reinhard…” malfoy stopped struggling momentarily.

“what?”

“i’m stuck…”

“merlin on a tricycle…” lestrange facepalmed with the hand not occupied holding onto the broom, “how?” the blonde tried pushing himself further through the window, collapsing his arms after failing.

“i don’t know i’m just stuck! (y/n) push harder!” he yells behind him.

“i’m trying!” you strain as you continue to push against his butt.

“try harder!”

“it’s your belt-i-i think it’s stuck—”

“girl you know these hips don’t lie!”

reinhard lestrange looked down and noticed the night lanterns turning on, signaling the nearing of curfew.

“get a move on you two! slughorn will be back any minute!” he lectured. right on queue, a prefect on watch was approaching the door, curious at the commotion.

“wait almost there, abraxas wiggle a little!” he obeys and does his little dancey dance. that along with your back pushing against his behind, finally had him flying out the window. lestrange gripped onto malfoys forearm, hoisting him up onto the broom behind him. both boys looking at you expectedly, but before you could even take another step, the door comes creaking open.

“it’s slughorn! go go i’ll cover for you!” you shoo your friends despite their reluctant pleas.

“y/l/n.” you shut the window and do a full 180-crazy, to be met with well, not your detention professor.

“riddle.”

“if i am not mistaken, i think you were attempting to abandon your detention while slughorn is in his meeting.”

“um no…” you deny. he quirked an amused eyebrow.

this should be interesting.

“what else could you have possibly be doing at the window then?” you scramble for an excuse.

“i saw…a bird?”

he blinked.

“a bird?”

“a bird, yes” you said with more confidence. tom scoffs.

“do you find me to be a simpleton?”

“i’m not sure how i should answer that-“

“i’m taking you to slughorn.” the slytherin prefect grabs you by the wrist and pulls you alongside him.

snitch. at least malfoy got away.

“two lemon drop fizzles,” you bribe.

“no”

“three?”

“you can’t bribe me with candy, (y/l/n). i’m not a child.” he says blankly, still stringing you behind him. the grip on your arm much softer now that he knew you wouldn’t fight it.

“and i said—joe mumma!” a familiar voice rounds the corner at the end of the hall, stopping you dead in your tracks.

rosier. audience boo’s.

accamponied by mulciber and black, he was headed straight toward you and the slytherin prefect.

he had to tendency to harass you with his unreciprocated desires to date. whether right now would be another attempt with tom around, you didn’t know, but we ain’t taking any chances tf.

“what is wrong with you?” riddle sighs impatiently.

turning around equally curious and concerned at the silent response. expecting a witty remark, he instead sees you hesitantly stepping behind an alcove…hiding. he followed your worried gaze to the brunette with his head turned to his friend, laughing about something. rosier waves off to his counterparts as they part ways.

as the boy approached, tom tried to puzzle together the connection between you two.

nothing came up.

perhaps even the most observant of people can miss out on other peoples lives when they’re so focused on their own. you were only a housemate, abraxas and reinhards friend, occasionally you two would run into each other at the library, and here and there you would best him in class marks—but not to the point where you became a threat to him. tom didn’t pay you much mine, respectfully. but now that he thought of it, he did recall a few short conversations you and rosier shared briefly between classes and after instruction, but you didn’t seem all the interested-

“riddle, i didn’t know you were on duty for this wing of the castle” rosier interrupts his thoughts. coming back to reality, tom didn’t realize how he had reached him down the corridor already.

suddenly he remembered you. behind him. and his body halfway turned.

“yes, well,” he stands a bit taller and turns fully toward rosier, his back blocking you from his view. “i believe prefect matters are of the concern of prefects, rosier. enjoy the rest of your evening.” tom does his best to end the conversation before it could even start. he had better use of his time, like ratting you out to slughorn.

“right,” you hear him respond, but you didn’t hear the sound of him leaving, making you hide deeper in the space of the wall. “have you happened to see (y/l/n) while on your rounds? i didn’t see her leave potions earlier-“

everything clicked in toms head, his eyebrows furrowing in disturbance, his throat needing clearing. tom squared his shoulders even more, encasing you into the wall. it was starting to get dark in the alcove 🤨

“i have not. and may i remind you that as a prefect, it is my duty to ensure the safety of all students.” he warns.

ooh girrrl. rosier’s confidence is thrown out the window, as he takes a cautious step back, muttering a farewell and scurrying off. a sigh of relief escapes you.

“alright he’s gone now,” tom informs, stepping away from you.

“ah tom! just who i wanted to see!” dear gods. tom grabs your wrist and pulls you back behind him, shielding you once again. he clears his throat to mask your yelp.

“professor slughorn, how was your meeting, sir?” tom asks politely. your eyebrows knit together in confusion rather than nervousness.

was the whole point of this not to bring you to slughorn?

“tom you should be patrolling dungeon corridors, whatever are you doing up here?”

busted.

toms hand squeezes unintentionally as he thinks.

“i saw a bird.” he says emotionlessly.

“a-“ professor chuckles, “i’m sorry, tom. did you say a bird?” you slap your other hand over your mouth trying not to burst into laughter.

“yes, a bird. i was trying to release it out…a window.” you were impressed he kept up with the lie.

“oh very well then,” he processes, “i will see you tomorrow.” tom goodbyes the professor politely. a sigh of relief leaves the both of you.

“a bird…” slughorn chuckles to himself as he walks down the corridor.

full creds to vid owner. i don’t support christian walker or his ideas but boy does he make a meme.

tom to rosier whenever he has the audacity:

got beef? (t.m.r.)

I am back hello. I moved on campus and girlbossed too close to the sun. Anyway this is unedited and kinda cray. 

summary: tom and y/n are called to the headmasters office when their son gets into an altercation

“that is preposterous. i demand a refund now!” you demand dramatically, banging your fist on dumbledores desk. the sheer force of your theatrics causing his cup of butterscotch wrapped candies to topple over.

the old man sighs and flicks his wand restoring its position. he looks up again but this time eyes looking through his half moon spectacles at your husband.

“some things never change do they riddle?” he comments on your emotional response. but in all honesty dumbledore was amused, he missed your student days when he had to fight a smile whenever you got in trouble over stupid things in his class and had the most interesting of ways retelling the story.

“i suppose not” tom gently pulls you back to your seat, keeping his hand wrapped around your forearm comfortably. you looked down at the gold band on his finger and the tension in your body suddenly left.

“…through sickness and health, richer and poorer…” tom recited, sliding the ring onto your finger. a chester cat smile grew in your face as you did the same.

“now you’re trapped with me…” you whispered.

“what was that?” the priest asked. but tom was unfazed he was used to your bs by now.

“well back to the matter…” headmaster clears his throat. “as i was saying, your son may be looking at suspension-”

“sir, i remember students would always hex each other. you know how young boys are.” tom defended.

“ah but see, tommy hilfiger riddle didn’t hex anyone.”

“i don’t understand-“

“it was a physical altercation. more specifically, he struck another student in the nose...”

“wonder where he learned that from…” tom mumbled, earning a jab to the ribs causing him to jump.

“good for nothing mudblood!”

“hey orion…” the boy stopped his stalking away and turned.

“what mudblood?”

“do you happen to be hungry?” he looked at you skeptic, then grinning looking at his friends who were joshing him. all except tom riddle, who was watching you curiously.

“why (y/l/n) going to make a sandwich-“

“nah but i got beef!” you pop him square in the face, the crunch sound echoing the halls, a grin playing on toms face.

“can we at least talk to the parents? i’m sure they will understand-“

“mum!” the door burst open, your eleven year old carbon copy of his father ran to you for a hug. the warm moment dissolved when you remembered why you were there in the first place.

“the child was lucius malfoy.”

“son of a—tom do you know what this means? his father is-“

“where is the boy?” a man bellowed entering the door. Wow so many interruptions today.

tom sat up straighter in his seat as your son ran behind you. platinum blonde hair…and an expensive ass robe…you must be a malfoy!

“it’s been a while abraxas.” your husband stood up and went toe to toe with the old classmate. clearly sizing each other up. oh, men 🙄. tom stuck out his hand and grinned at the couple of inches he had on malfoy. the blonde sneered, accepting the handshake anyway.

his blue eyes moved, landing on you, his schoolboy crush, barely even noticing the little one gripping your arm. he smirked. smirked.

“(y/n)…always knew you’d be a milf-“

your eyes grew wide, but only doubled in size when toms fist flew across his face. your son looked up to see your reaction, in which you looked back at him with a smirk.