The Fundamentals Of Finding Things - Tumblr Posts

"The Fundamentals of Finding things" a book of poems

Untitled writing, Isabella Lamberty

“I hope you give me a warning when you get married.”

My whole brain and body shot up in the car seat. His mother peered at us through the rearview mirror as she drove.

He grinned. “How much time do you need?”

“At least two years,” Her voice was half serious, half joking. Through her accent and broken english, I noticed a sincerity there– as if she was pleading, get married one day Son, por favor.

His grin was wide and genuine unlike his picture smiles, he told his mom, “Alright, I’ll let you know.”

I laughed, and we all laughed. His mom laughed because she wanted him to marry, and me because I knew he might never marry, and never to me. But he smiled a bright smile that killed me inside. I wanted to say this, to say, “I can’t picture you getting married.” Truth be told it’s locked in my dreams: flashes of our church– which was not very church shaped– all decked out in floral arrangements, and us at the altar, his father– the pastor– officiating. I think, how delusional of me? I wish I had said it then, in the car, but maybe it would've spoiled the moment of laughter, or the little bit of hope in my heart that he wouldn't mind being married to me.