Tumblr Stories - Tumblr Posts

I really want a science fiction story where aliens come to invade earth and effortlessly wipe out humanity, only to be fought off by the wildlife.

They were expecting military resistance. They weren’t counting on bears.

Every year, a superstitious village abandons a human child in a nearby forest in exchange for divine protection. In actuality, an old hermit adopts the children and teaches them to ward off intruders. This year, the hermit’s best apprentice happens to locate and escort the abandoned child.

All you’ve ever wanted was to be feared and rule the world but every villainous act you commit backfires. Steal candy from a baby? Poisoned candy, baby saved. Steal the baby? Abusive parents. Threw a woman off a building? Push she needed to unlock her powers of flight, she’s now your sidekick.

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

i’m gonna make a movie where two normal ladies fall in love. everything’s chill, no age gap, they’re both out of the closet, their families love them, everything’s fine. the catch is that one lady has a cat and the other lady never figured out what the cat’s name was cause the Owner Lesbian ALWAYS uses a dumb nickname and now it’s been three years and they’re getting married and it’s too late to just ask

In a world where genies are commonplace and delight in granting wishes in the most inconvenient way possible, you are a defense attorney who must defend your client, a well-meaning genie who is charged with felonious wish-granting.

A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.

It’s that typical story all over again: you are a princess. You get kidnapped, some random guy saves you, and then your father gets you married to him. No. Not this Time. You have watched a million versions of the same random guy beat a demon and become your husband even though you don’t love him, so this time, you kill the demon. You kill your father, the king. It doesn’t matter to you… After all, he’s only a program in the video game that is your life. 

You will stop at nothing to break this game.

A Vulcan named Stork works at the Terran adoption agency. Parents always request that he be the one to deliver their child to them.

You, the queen of a fairy tale kingdom, got cursed to give birth to a princess who’s going to live her life isolated in a tower the first 20 years of her life. Narrate how you avoid your daughter’s fate.

How Jason Met Tim, a Remix

To see the Red Hood is to see Death Himself, only he has dispensed with the cloak and cusses a lot more. Gotham's criminals tremble before him. Batman weeps at the sight of him.

Only Tim Drake does not stand in awe of him.

Tim Drake stands before him now, in all his 5 foot 4 inch glory, dressed in a Robin suit of his own and smacking bubble gum in his mouth.

“Bruce was all cut up about 'cha,” Tim says by way of greeting. “I wanted to see what all the fuss was about.” Tim scans the Red Hood impassively before blowing out a bubble with his gum. “Eh, I've seen better.”

Jason is nonplussed at this mouthy gremlin. Their meeting was not supposed to go like this. “Who've you seen better?”

“My best friend is Superboy. I've counted ten ab muscles on him. Have you got ten abs? Didn't think so. Check and mate.”

Oh no, he's a twink, Jason realizes. Still, he's going to battle him.

“Are we going to talk all night, or ...are we gonna fight?” Jason demands.

Tim shakes his head. “Pass. Patrol's over, and Bruce is gonna ground my ass if I'm home late again.”

“So what was the point of this!?”

“What, I can't see my shiny new brother?”

That stops Jason short. Brother? What the hell? He can barely process this as Tim looks down at his phone that's buzzing.

“Dick's texting me. He says my ass is grounded, and I better be safe. I...am...with...Jason,” Tim mutters as he types. Before Jason can react, Tim had sent the text. Within seconds, the phone is buzzing with frantic texts from Dick.

Is Jason really with you?

Are you alright?

Hi Jaybird! I miss you! ( ^３^ )╱~~　

Timmy come home right now, Bruce is yelling

Bring Jason. If you can.

Give him a hug from me!

Tim puts his phone away as Jason finishes reading the erratic slew of texts. “Right, wanna hug?”

Jason recoils. “God, no.”

“Welp, looks like Dick is gonna have to settle for loving you from afar, ” Tim says, pocketing his phone. “Want some gum?”

“No.”

“Its double bubble berry flavored.”

“No!”

“Clever,” Tim says with a nod, pocketing the gum. “I had ingestible nano GPS trackers in them. Good intuition. You've passed the Timmy Test.”

“What.”

“Rule numero uno in the Timmy Handbook Of Success - Always assume that outside sources of food have ingestible trackers. If you do ingest something, take two insta-laxatives in a remote area and wait. Once passed, proceed to secondary hideout.”

Jason stared at the paranoid munchkin in front of him. There was no way that Bruce had raised this tiny freak. For some reason, Jason felt good about that.

“How did you become Robin?”

“I already knew that Bruce was Batman. I let myself into the cave and told him that he sucked ass without a Robin, and to take me on. Bruce told me to go away, but Alfred gave me dinner and let me stay. Haven't looked back since.”

Jason harrumphed. Tim continued to smack his gum. “Welp, I'm going home. If I'm late longer than ten minutes, Dick starts to cry.”

Yuck. “He was never that protective over me.”

“Yeah, but then you died.” Ouch, right in the kisser. “Also, I'm objectively cuter.”

How dare this twink, really. “Are not.”

“Am so. Superboy says so.”

“Get going before I punch you.”

Jason watched Tim swing away, and reached for his phone.

Hey Dickhead

Immediately, Jasons phone buzzed in response.

Jaybird! Are we speaking again? Yay!

Jason grinned. The noob wouldn't know what hit him.

Tim told me things that led me to infer that Superboy is hot for his tiny ass.

:O really?

There was a brief pause in messaging as Dick no doubt relayed this information to Bruce.

Bruce says that Tim is quadruple grounded. Tha ks for looking out for him, Jay!

Cackling, Jason tucked his phone away. That'd show Tim who was objectively cuter, and teach him to never mess with the Red Hood.

Science fiction is full of first contact stories, but is there a such thing as LAST contact?  Decide exactly what that means, and write about it.

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Salmonella @derinthescarletpescatarian!

I think society in general needs more silly hats. I think it would solve a lot of problems

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

*places an orange just outside a fairy ring to see what comes out* science is more of an art than a science

We had an exciting visitor this week! My niece and nephews discovered this lost homing pigeon at my parents' alpaca farm, so they called me to help because I have a slight history with rescuing birbs. Mom gave it food and water and kept it in a dog kennel overnight (it was very very hungry!) We tried releasing it the next day since the tag suggested it was a racing pigeon, but it didn't seem to know what to do, so we brought it back in.

(Trying to help me with my editing, to limited success.)

But, happy day, I was able to contact the national pigeon racing organization signified on its legband, and they got me in touch with the area chapter referenced by the legband code, and HE got me in touch with the owner! The owner said this little guy was very young and got scared off by a hawk attack about a week ago (which explains the very small, healed-over scab on his neck). And he is from over an hour's drive south of here! We were both surprised he wandered that far! The owner was SUPER appreciative that we took care of him and made the effort to find the owner, and lo and behold, there is a pigeon auction he had been considering attending IN MY TOWN, so he asked if we could take care of it until this Saturday! All of us were super jazzed at this happy ending and I volunteered to keep the bird until then.

Also, when I asked the bird's name, he said it didn't have one yet. My niece was DELIGHTED when he said it would now be called by her name suggestion, Pedro! :D

Anyhoo, I took him to my house since I have dove food. He is very nervous and baby, but I have been loving on him to help keep him used to peoples. And my doves have been surprisingly accomodating (only going after him if he tries to land on their cage)!

(Compared to the doves he is a BIG BOY)

And all of this has also led to one of my new favorite bird pictures I have ever taken:

Pogo Stick Pedro

I had somewhat infrequent contact with the church youth group as a high schooler–I wasn’t a regular attendee, but enough of my friends were that I usually had the lowdown on what was happening. I have a personal policy that I don’t turn down invitations to participate in things unless I have an actual conflict (which is, let me tell you, an interesting, rewarding, and occasionally dangerous way to live your life) so when one of my friends said, “Hey, Hell, the youth group is doing a volunteer project and we need people. You in?” I said sure.

She told me to dress for messy outdoor work, and we’d drive there together on Saturday morning. No other details were provided.

So Saturday morning came, and I found myself standing in jeans, steeltoe boots and a tank top in front of a very, very run-down house with about a dozen other teenagers and a couple adults. The adults had that slightly manic look common to youth group leaders, and matching church t-shirts. 

They also had half a dozen sledgehammers.

I had a fantastic feeling about how this day was going to go. 

The house, they explained, was condemned. It needed to be demolished. 

There were words after that about the who and the what and the why (and, presumably, about why they had decided to recruit a bunch of teenagers to do this In The Name Of Jesus) but I was vibrating at a speed that rendered audio waves impossible to decipher and didn’t catch any of it. Something-something-something-jesus, something-something-something-hit things with sledgehammers, don’t hit the marked support beams,  Something-something-something-HELL YOU GET TO WRECK THIS HOUSE was basically all that got through.

They said something that my brain interpreted as “GO!” 

I had a sledgehammer in my hand and was swinging through the front door faster than a chipmunk on cocaine. Which was wholly unnecessary; the front door was unlocked. I just wanted to do it. 

I plowed a straight line through that house from front door through the back wall just because I could, then doubled back to go for some of the fun tile spots. Around me, a dozen sweaty teenagers were going absolutely feral. The ones with sledgehammers were swinging wildly at anything they could reach, and the ones without were kicking holes in the drywall for no reason and prying apart any surface they could get a grip on.  

The adults had cleared out about five minutes in; we were left with our sledgehammers and no inhibitions.

 These wholesome christian teens had spent most of their lives being proper and helpful, and now, for what may have been the first time, they were being told to be as destructive as they were capable of being, and it immediately went to their heads. We were a swarm of holy termites. We were sledgehammer-bearing tornadoes. We punched holes in that house until there wasn’t any house left to punch holes in.

Did we take out some of the marked support beams on accident? Absolutely. Was this whole plan deeply, deeply unwise? Sure! But we were having a great time!

The teens with sledgehammers mostly got tired and traded off sooner or later, and a couple of us decided that now was the time to solve some universal mysteries for ourselves, like: can I run straight through a wall if I get a far enough running start? Can I kick a door down like in a movie? If we work together, can we throw John right through that drywall?

The answers to these questions was a shining, reverberating YES.

(John was fine, probably.)

By the time we felt that our work was done, the house was just a few upright studs with a roof on top, sitting in a lake of debris. We straggled out on to the front lawn, dragging our sledgehammers, and watched as the adults hooked chains to the remaining beams. The chains were hooked to the back hitch of someone’s Compensator pickup truck, which was being used for its actual function for probably the first time ever. We watched as the truck pulled away from the curb, the chains going tight–

–and with a sound like breaking toothpicks, the beams broke, and the house pancaked in on itself.  We cheered like it was the Second Coming. 

I don’t know why they had us do this. I don’t even know whose house it was. I just know that there are few joys purer than the joy of wrecking something bigger than you with nothing but the strength of your own arms, and few euphorias more glorious than the feeling of putting a sledgehammer through a front door for no reason at all.

Tumblr Folklore Stories/Blogs Directory/Masterlist

There are so many great Tumblr Blog stories here! But things are best when organized! Here you are! I’m going to use Tumblr Blaze in a couple weeks to spread this to everyone, but if all of you can reblog this to everyone you know, we can spread the joys of Tumblr to EVERYONE!

Credit to https://www.tumblr.com/dannnnnnnnnnnnex/700073427344736256/love-how-tumblr-has-its-own-folk-stories-yeah-the

The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)

The Monster of Sentan

The Witch’s Cat

Raise Both Children

Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)

Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)

My Arch Nemesis Cynthia

Pirates and Mermaid

Eindred and the Witch

The Demon King

The Cornerwitch

Grandmother Beetroot

Apocalypse Daycare Worker

Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon

New Year Saga

A Story About Changelings

Ranger in the King’s Forest

The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit

Goblin Men (Canines)

Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

 The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

Doctors Without Borders

The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

Well, now they’re categorized.

 https://www.tumblr.com/inkvoices/700033965299531776/love-how-tumblr-has-its-own-folk-stories-yeah-the

https://www.tumblr.com/lightningladybug/699931426130444288/love-how-tumblr-has-its-own-folk-stories-yeah-the

https://www.tumblr.com/blitzlowin/699840636252225536/love-how-tumblr-has-its-own-folk-stories-yeah-the

Also, this is a RWBY-positivity BLOG, so please watch RWBY