Tw Gender Essentialism - Tumblr Posts

so general political fandom opinion that is also kinda emotionally charged 4 me that i don't think a lot of ppl will agree w me on:

while it's generally understood that "race-bending" a character can b politically insensitive in certain contexts, e.g. making the only character in a show that's a racial minority white, or making a character POC 4 clout ect

i feel like we as adults need 2 acknowledge that the same can b said of gender-bending characters

[important: there is a difference between gender-bending a character vs headcanon-ing them as trans, trans hcs r not what this is abt]

there's a very concerning trend i've noticed lately, where ppl will take a fandom ship that's a mlm ship and gender-bend it into a wlw ship, or even just make art of the mlm ship but in the description say "lesbians" or "yuri" and omg don't get me started on the ppl i c calling mlm ships "yuri yaoi" 2 indicate a non-toxic mlm "yaoi" ship

u guys need 2 come off of the gender essentialism kool aid, i rly need u 2 get this thru ur thick fucking skulls

being a man is morally neutral

being a woman is morally neutral

being a man does not make some1 inherently bad or abusive

being a woman does not make some1 inherently better or remove any toxic traits

it's exactly that kind of mentality, the idea that being a man is inherently wrong or evil or perverse in some way, that kept me and many other transmascs in the closet 4 way longer than we would've been otherwise, that leaves us fearing ourselves, what lies beneath the facade of false womanhood, that leaves us unequipped 2 deal w the concept of loving ourselves and accepting ourselves completely

trans men ARE men and not just when you want to malgender them

transmascs ARE masc and not just when you want 2 use our masculinity against us

transmascs who see ourselves as "man-adjacent" are still hurt when u say this shit abt us and abt men even if they r men in a way that's different from us

also, gay men (and probably also bi and other groups of men who love men but i can't speak 2 that personally) , who are often accessorised by straight women (c "gay best friend") often hav 2 deal w being seen as an accessory 2 straight women and being expected 2 make our entire existence revolve around straight women while at the same time our love is seen as inherently toxic, the "logic" usually goes smth like "well men r inherently abusive and there's 2 men so that must mean they r just abusing each other in a circle right?" which obviously isn't how that works bc not all men r abusive bc abusive behaviour is not smth inherent 2 being a man

im so sick of wanting 2 look at an mlm ship 2 try 2 remind myself that it's okay that im like this and that i am the way i am only 2 c the tag flooded w gender-bend fanart or ppl calling these gay men "lesbians" 2 indicate that they r older than 25 or 2 indicate that they think the ship isn't toxic or worse, they say that the original ship is toxic, don't explain y other than "man inherently abusive" and then make a gender-bend of the ship and act like it's them "fixing" it

i am not inherently abusive 4 being a gay guy

i am not inherently abusive 4 being transmasc and "man-adjacent" as i would put it

i also am noticing ppl putting words like "lesbaians" or "yuri" in the description when they make more chaste mlm ship fanart like of cuddling or hand holding which like.... ew.... way 2 piss off 2 communities at once ig

i wasn't 2 mad abt the gender-bends at 1st but then i started 2 notice a pattern and i had 2 say smth

istg if i c 1 more person make gender-bend fanart of an mlm ship w the description being "fixed it" or another fucking piece of fanart that is of 2 men being cuddly and chaste and neither of these men identity as also being women and the description is "lesbaians" or "yuri" i am going 2 fucking scream

tumblr users stop taking popular mlm ships and then flooding the tags 4 them w wlw gender-bend fanart versions of those ships at the very least make ur own tag 4 it like idk "fem![character]xfem![character]" or "fem![ship name]" it's not ok when u invade our mlm ship tags 2 tell us u think our love is toxic or that it would b better if we were women, ur literally just invading our online spaces where we go 2 feel safe 2 tell us u don't like us, and 4 some of us, 2 tell us that u wish we never transitioned

just 2 b clear im not talking abt cases here where the characters in question r nonbinary in a way that means that they see themselves as both men and women and so ppl call it "yuri yaoi" bc the characters r both men and women at the same time, that's a whole different thing of ppl just having some cool stuff going on w their gender and not at all what this post is abt, it's also smth tho that i hav not seen nearly as much as what this post is abt and also i don't hav any experience w being nonbinary in that way so im gonna leave that topic 4 some1 who has a better understanding of that shit than me