Worse Than Lovers - Tumblr Posts

"Weißer, weißer, weißer als weiß.

Weiter, weiter durch's ewige Eis.

Heller, heller, weißer als weiß.

Weiter, weiter durch's ewige Eis." ©

Art: Lunatic Sun /traditional artwork/

"Ilya lowered his eyes. He felt stupid and ridiculous, looking at the flowers in his hands. All determination seemed to dissipate, his heart was beating somewhere in his throat.

– Death has looked at me and turned away so many times that I feel like I’m not even worthy of her.

– And that’s why you went up to the sacrifice, like a lamb to the slaughter? You are persistent. So, you smell of incense. Have you been to the temple?

– Yes, Quaestor.

– With your martyr eyes, this suits you well, Doctor №069."

© "Nec Deus intersit"

Art by: Wasteofplace/Chilledoutbeast

"It is thy mouth that I desire, Iokanaan. Thy mouth is like a band of scarlet on a tower of ivory. It is like a pomegranate cut in twain with a knife of ivory. The pomegranate flowers that blossom in the gardens of Tyre, and are redder than roses, are not so red. The red blasts of trumpets that herald the approach of kings, and make afraid the enemy, are not so red. Thy mouth is redder than the feet of those who tread the wine in the wine-press. It is redder than the feet of the doves who inhabit the temples and are fed by the priests. It is redder than the feet of him who cometh from a forest where he hath slain a lion, and seen gilded tigers. Thy Mouth is like a branch of coral that fishers have found in the twilight of the sea, the coral that they keep for the kings!.. It is like the vermilion that the Moahites find in the mines of Moab, the vermilion that the kings take from them. It is like the bow of the King of the Persians, that is painted with vermilion, and is tipped with coral. There is nothing in the world so red as thy mouth…

Suffer me to kiss thy mouth."

© Oscar Wilde, "Salomé"

/art: Lunatic Sun/

This sketch is old, but gold. 2021, traditional art and I was mesmerized by the idea of this masochistic boy going slightly mad. Or, maybe, becoming more sane and… mature?)

This dynamic is quite specific. Surely, it goes far beyond the conventional frame. And, to be honest, I'm a near perfectionist and I find it difficult to please me in fanart and fanfiction content — few people share my vision, so I decided to create content by myself. And sometimes I feel like I'm up against the most part of the fandom in my vision. :D

I enjoy the thought the fact that Valdemar are scientist — anyway they are still scientist, no matter how strong their sadistic side is — affects their mindset a lot. The scientific approach makes one see things as they are. Valdemar are not free from some sorts of obsessions or affections, but at least they are totally aware of them.

I like the idea of a specific form of interest between Valdemar and Julian in a rather sadomasochistic way.

This is a form of complete, true acceptance without romantic emotional overtone — at least, from Valdemar’s side. And a mature understanding of the entire process as it is from Julian's side — 'cause he knows how they treat him, and accepts that.

With the inevitable — oh, dear audience, believe my humble experience — attraction between the sadistic and masochistic nature.

"Nur ein Herz aus Eis

lässt dich weitergehen.

Nur ein Herz aus Eis

lässt dich wiederstehen.

Weißer, weißer, weißer als weiß.

Weiter, weiter durch's ewige Eis."

/art: Lunatic Sun/

I should post more often, but I am depressive slop. :D

But yesterday I saw such a beautiful tweet, and couldn’t handle it.

You can consider the screen from PSL Tale as an Easter egg, if you know what I mean. ;}

/Lunatic Sun/

/up: The Arcana game (PSL Tale)

below: art by Lunatic Sun

Text by: mars_adler on Twitter (now known as X)/

Such an old piece. Something 'bout mortido.

Sorry not sorry. :D

🔻🔻🔻

🔻TW: slight gore & decapitation

/© Lunatic Sun. 2022/

"Words, words… It's in human nature – to talk less, hide the details. This is usually quite annoying, but now is rather confusing. "You're so beautiful…" – what could they think he mean in these words? It seems Valdemar haven't ever heard them this way before. Could a hanged man tell it to his gallows? Could he feel love to the rope, which ties around his neck? Could he whisper with his bloodless lips "thank you for all", while he take the last breath of air?

Valdemar could swear on their longstanding bonds with Devil: there was no man like him. It doesn't matter what faith any other person has. There's no martyr in history who is able to match such experience, no matter how strong religious exaltation they sensed in their agony.

Doctor №069 - Julian Devorak, isn't it? - the man was perfectly insane, but so much beauty was held in this insanity."

De profundis clamavi ad te domine,

Exaudi vocem meam,

Quia ventus est vita mea,

Nec aspiciat me visus hominis.

/art/text (except Psalm 129): Lunatic Sun/

"– People are obsessed with love, looking for it and not getting what they really need. Fragile, stupid creatures. You consider love as a magical tool that can change the world and then you go around in circles. But your eyes are clouded with illusions. You think: if this love didn’t give me what I need, it is not "real". You are fascinated by the myth of true love. You think it would last for the rest of your life, understanding and healing everything. But love is just a myth.

Ilya looked up, his lips trembling.

– What am I looking for? I don’t really know, Quaestor Valdemar. But I know that you are... incapable of love. I know this and I have come to you willingly.

Quaestor is answered:

– You came to the sacrificial fire. Frankly, I’m impressed by your deep, desperate masochism. It’s attractive – how can predator be attracted to the easy prey. You came to me because you can no longer look for something in people – something they want too and can’t give you. A kind of the truth. However, perhaps you intuitively tried to give it to them.

You understand what I am. You’re not making any illusions about my personality. You’ve seen what I can do. Others have deceived you. But you still hope. Dum spiro, spero is your unfailing credo.

Valdemar went quiet for a while and then added, looking into Julian’s eyes:

– And like all men, you still worship love as a god. Funny. But… Nec deus intersit."

Text: Lunatic Sun

Art:

Sketch: chilledoutbeast

Colouring: wasteofplace

previous fragment:

Tumblr

Let there be †Mayhem†

"Ilya lowered his eyes. He felt stupid and ridiculous, looking at the flowers in his hands. All determination seemed to dissipate, his heart

Doctor №069 was napping on the couch in his room in the Dungeons. Hearing Quaestor's footsteps nearby, he sleepily responded:

– Behold, my Death cometh…

(based on a true story, sorry not sorry. Thank Apostle Jay for inspiration)

P. S. Beware: I'm (not only me) the uncompromising shipper Valdemar/Julian from the first time:

And because of this:

You've been warned. The right of appeal is eliminated.

"Just imagine!" Julian said playfully, continuing to gesticulate and laugh:

"Me – walking down the street. Handsome! Dangerous! Proud and unapproachable!.."

"…And awesome, as an army with banners, doctor №069?" Valdemar raised their eyebrows ironically.

Another person immediately disappeared and there was silence.

Julian stopped speaking, looked at the Quaestor and felt his face rapidly flush scarlet:

"Who is this who comes up from the wilderness like pillars of smoke, perfumed with myrrh and frankincense, with all spices of the merchant?"

Valdemar shook their head in response:

"How is your beloved better than another beloved, that you do so adjure us? Return, that we may gaze at you."

Without delay, Julian turned to Valdemar, and took a step towards them.

"But I beg them, don't they turn away their eyes from me, for they have overcome me".

Then he came closer, bowed his head and added:

"…for love is strong as Death".

"Strong as Death, you say?"

Valdemar replied after several seconds of silence, grinning, "Shall I consider you a worthy adversary?"

"Unless it's Song of Songs quotation challenge, Quaestor", Julian replied with a laugh.

/thx Apostle Jay for inspiration, indeed. I love kinda complicated relationships between protagonists and antagonists. As much as I love complicated headcanons, you know.🖤/

/godsend song, brutal growling with classic cello is what I absolutely needed/

Clearly, it's not easy to hide your relationship in Vesuvia. Especially when it looks questionable. Problematic. But only for the people around, of course. And none of these two cared about it. Valdemar despised the opinion of the crowd (and people in general) — and this is a huge understatement. And Doctor №069… Oh, he was too passionate and devoted to think about it. He couldn't hide his feelings.

Surely, one would notice, that Julian Devorak spends too much time in the Dungeons. That he blushes every time someone mentiones his mentor's name. That Valdemar walked with this young man down the streets of Vesuvia side by side — and usually they showed no love, interest or even mercy for the humankind.

- Are they lovers?

- No, they're worse.

/© Apostle Jay /

"The worst was this; my love was my decay"

© W. Shakespeare

Part 3/3 ⏬

/© Art; text – Lunatic Sun/

part 2/3

part 1/3

I got into WIPs, but there are finished drawings, so in this case my conscience is clear. :D

So, how it started:

How it's going:

(The "Sketch>Finished Art" team, I'm with you guys. Seriously, I really think that coloring is not my strong suit. However, I myself love the dark palette more than the bright one, but I just appreciate the contrasts that WasteOfPlace usually adds.

Like here.

Or here.

However, this is no reason to stop drawing on my own. I don't like to bother my team with my own petty whims. :D /L. S./)

And I hope Anon with the "Valdemar x Julian playlist" request is still here. Someday I will drop the whole playlist, I promise.🫀

(I am synaesthete and I love the dark-blue palette of early Apocalyptica so much. "Not strong enough" is not "the early Apocalyptica™ era", but indeed the Julian POV.)

(I was just waiting for the song that would fit perfectly with the whole atmosphere that I had in mind. So I found it.)

/art ©Lunatic Sun/

Quaestor Valdemar/Dr. Julian Devorak from The Arcana

What's a few more bleeding out a little early, in pursuit of a cure? Necessary sacrifices.

"I think I figured it out," grumbled Doctor №069 as he scrubbed another dissection table.

"This superstition that if you scatter poppy seeds in front of the undead, they will start counting them. Because of you, Quaestor!"

"You are extremely clever for your vapid head, Doctor №069," Valdemar grinned, carefully placed their polished scalpels.

(Based on a true story. Thanks to ApostleJay for such fun)

Here is some information to consider... ⏬

Note: this belief is more common in Eastern Europe, and no, I absolutely don't like headcanons about "Russian Ilya". Also, I remember the Devs' speech: Jeff Goldblum is a reference for Julian. Who is Jeff Goldblum? A Jew. But his family was from Eastern Europe and there were so many Jewish towns. Nevivon looks like one of those towns. For example, the kitchen in Nevivon (*"the Warm Welcome") is divided into two areas: meat and dairy. What is this? The basic principle of kashrut. "But Julian was born near Nevivon"? Yes. But Tasya said (to the Lishka; again, definitely not "a common Russian name", "Lishka" sounds much more like something Czech) about the treasure that is only passed on through the female line. An elegant homage to a specifically Jewish cultural thing, iykwim.

Also, the whole image of Julian is a stereotypical Jewish image in European culture: he's redheaded, a doctor, a violinist*, etc. Sorry not sorry.

(*Technically he is a vielle player, but the vielle is a precursor of the violin. And: no, there have never been any vielle players in Russia, except the modern times, represented by rare baroque ensembles.)

Definitely not Russian, diminutives like "Ilyushka" are not specific to Russian language, Portia is not a common Russian name (neither are Pasha and Ilona, her mother). And... have you ever heard of, say, Antonín Dvořák, the famous Czech composer of the 19th century?

BTW, ApostleJay and I have a theory about Portia Devorak. Nothing special, we're just guessing about the reference: Portia, the female protagonist in "The Merchant of Venice". Why not, since the game itself has enough references to classical literature.

At last: I once saw a Julian-kinny boy here. And he said he wanted to learn Russian to be more like a Julian. Poor boy, if you ever see my speech, here is my unsolicited advice.

Please don't learn Russian to be more like Julian. Learn Yiddish. It will be much more in character.

(Czechia? Maybe Bohemia? I need Julian singing "Bohemian rhapsody", IMMEDIATELY!)

– "I stole Valdemar's heart!"

– "What do you mean?!" – his cupmates in Rowdy Raven yelled in shock. Ilya takes a flask containing the anatomical specimen from his medical bag. He carefully places it on the table, unable to suppress a victorious grin.

A few seconds later, all the witnesses to his triumphant pose turn pale as a black latex hand falls on Ilya's shoulder and squeezes. Everyone has heard a well-known low cadence with a reptilian hiss in the overtones; soft, but for some reason more deafening than all the sounds of the tavern:

– "And then you will lose your head, Doctor №069".🫀

/© Lunatic Sun./

(P. S. Sorry not sorry. And yep, "Death as she/her" not as misgendering, but in a… kinda metaphysical way, ofc. :D here's the proof, and I can't unsee in first screenshots kinda brat and jealous inflections in his speech from the very first time. And you were warned about my "juldemar apologetic in a doctrinal way". Any objections here will be rejected, if this is not your cup of tea – deal with it, 'cause this is my cup of tea. However, I do not want to impose my thoughts and opinions on anyone.)