Young Poet - Tumblr Posts
i am not the kind of woman that i wanted to be as a girl i was born of the writers plath, dickinson, shelley, and woolf these women are to me as gods the only beings worthy of my worship to be referenced in their likeness would be the greatest of praise.
to sit and hear these children being ordered to condemn us sinners even those that they love the preacher calls them superior as well as unworthy and impure the chosen sinners justify the slaughter of children in the name of an ever-loving god dressing them and their words up to damage minds that know nothing else i hear their claims of compassion and love yet their motivations are anything but pure.
-- The Chosen Sinners
hurting myself has become a habit.
some day i hope that you shall learn all the thoughts i have ever had then you will truly know me.
i had fucking exam this morning then i came home to kill my cat.
i found a dead sparrow at my bus stop today the side of the road was no place for this bird i crouched down and cupped it in my hand blood leaked from its beak the only place near was the wild cat's grave seeing the rotting corpse filled me with horror and disgust an unrecognisable mess the scent of decaying flesh caused my breath to hitch i lay the sparrow on a mound of dirt something forcing me to take in the sight and i now fear that it shall never leave me.
others call me nice but is that all that they see? am i not clever nor strong? am i not accomplished nor respected? am i not ambitious nor witty? am i those things at all? i for one would not object to being called pretty.
"i keep forgetting to enjoy my life."
"i always thought of my cat as a familiar of sorts she embodied myself and i could not imagine a life without her now that she is about to die resting on her deathbed i cannot help but fear that i shall die with her."
-- musings of a teenage witch
"people are actually reading what i write."
i do not remember wanting anything but to be smart to be clever to be intelligent it is my never-failing wish that i can never stop striving towards everyday i need to do better be better. i do not know when it will be enough.
i dont understand why it takes something sweet to bring me pleasure perhaps i was sick of your love when it grew sour.
i love women not just in the way i hide from the church but in the way that nourishes sisterhood they all have this inherent beauty whether they are a different colour have not been one as long as i young or old i shall love them all the same.
the only thing harder than the ride to the vet is the ride home.
"i couldnt do it i couldnt stay i couldnt watch her die i instead fled to the waiting room like the coward i am i could not even wait alone and i begged my love to join me."
-- Goodbye To My Cat
"this false reality is far better than my real one."
i think you are the love of my life but we have only been together for nine months i think you are the love of my life but i am only 17 i think you are the love of my life but what if we break up i think you are the love of my life but what if you arent?
this time last week i felt like my life was over and did not plan on continuing today i have laughed more than i ever have before it may be overused advice but it really is worth it to keep going.
"for a while, it felt like sex was all we did. the second we were alone, our clothes came off. i was content with this for some time - happy, even - but then i came to wonder whether it was me that you loved or my body. yesterday, we had fun. youthful, giggling fun that left us both is a laughing fit. i do not think i have ever laughed so hard. while i enjoy having sex, i want to laugh with you, too."
-- a message to my love
maybe i really have misunderstood my mother all this time.