Riz And Kalinas Conversation In Hell Is Currently Just. Polluting My Brain. Just. God, Riz Seeing His

riz and kalina’s conversation in hell is currently just. polluting my brain. just. god, riz seeing his father bound and gagged and tortured like. god he’s just a kid man he’s 17? 16? they’re babies man. and don’t even get me started on “You know what the kind thing to do with that gun would be” because i’m still weeping

i realized i have one important addition and it’s that they all have one corset that is orange-themed. sometimes they accidentally wear matching corsets and fabian is very dramatic about it (he loves it though). 

The Bad Boys™ in Corsets

Fabian: Fabian loves it. He loves the Drama™ . He wears those fancy pirate shirts and ripped skinny jeans and will strut around Aguefort like a goddamn peacock. He owns some that cost more than Riz’s monthly rent. He dances now, baby! Toxic masculinity is dead. He is going to wear a corset and he’s going to make sure you know how sexy he is wearing it. Cathilda and Adaine are probably the only people he trusts to lace him up (he let Gorgug do it once and it was too loose; Fig tried and nearly broke one of his ribs; Riz and Kristen are uncharted territory and he’s a little afraid to let them try). Gorgug: The first time he wears it is because Fig peer pressures him into wearing one for a magazine shoot. He feels really awkward in it but Zelda jumps him as soon as the photos are released. This may also have been due in part to a video Fig took of Gorgug raging so hard he literally popped the lacing and seams of the corset. He is so shy so he’s constantly hunched over so he wears one for the back support lol. He’ll wear one underneath a giant hoodie when the Bad Kids are having a day where they’re just being teenagers. Fig and Garthy teamed up to make him an Orcish inspired one; Fig also teamed up with the Thistlesprings to make a Gnomish inspired one for him. At her girlfriend’s insistence Ayda is researching a rage-proof corset fitting for the Greatest Wizard of Their Age. Most of his are plain or floral patterned, though. 

Riz: He would either love it or hate it. The more masculine vest-type corsets fit very well with his detective/fancy-boy aesthetic he has going on, but as a rogue he needs to be able to move his body in ways that might dislocate other people’s bones. When he wears it he is All Business. You know how some people put on an outfit and embody it’s personality? That’s Riz with a corset. He becomes absolutely insufferable. He is a man on a mission and will interrogate anyone and everyone who has any information about his current case. He is also now powerful and professional enough to shoot off your fingers one-by-one if you refuse him (not that he needed the additional support to do that). Riz also has no care for social expectations so the minute his corset starts to bother him he will start taking it off and throw it at the nearest Bad Kid to hold (it’s usually Kristen and it usually hits her in the face)

sometimes i watch only the first four episodes of a crown of candy and pretend that everything is fine. it’s fine. nothing is wrong the tartguard are dancing again and it’s fine. 

i was going to say the boys fight with the elementals is the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen but I just watched the scene where they’re all dancing together and I’m crying

Imagine Gorgug, Ragh, and Fabian each getting a tattoo of an orange to remind themselves that their friends love and support them

Post crab-party the bad kids and hirelings all have some sort of crab/lobster/shrimp based name for at least a weak. The names are as follows:

Hermit Crab: Riz (his also has a little crown beside it because he’s the current crab king)

Crab Raghoons: Ragh 

Werelobster: Tracker 

Devilled Crab: Fig

Crab Cake: Gorgug 

Little Shrimp: Fabian (he gets so mad and tries to change it and Fig and Adaine team up to block his name-changing privileges)

Shrimply the Best: Adaine

Crachos :Kristen