Mun is 21+ You can call me Kay.
93 posts
Birds-n-bats - Bluejay - Tumblr Blog
Bruce: Can you come out?
Tim: Okay, gimme a minute.
Tim: Bruce, I’m bi.
Bruce: I know that, son. I meant come out to the Batmobile.
Tim: Batmobile, I’m bi.
What's the scariest/weirdest thing Barbara has found in each of the batfams search history? I'm betting Tim's the weirdest ngl
Bruce: That concludes our briefing. Does anyone have any questions?
Barbara, raising her hand: Yeah. Am I still eligible for clown pensions if I leave the circus?
Dick: Excuse me?
Barbara: Never mind, I'll figure it out later. I was also wondering how much butter is in a calorie.
Steph: How'd you get that?
Barbara: And what's the address for CW studios? I wanna undo Destiel's ending.
Cullen: That was private!
Barbara: My bad. We should focus back on the case... right after I declare my legal status as a cryptid.
Cass: *whirls around*
Barbara: And I wanna start selling commissions of superheroes reimagined as a puppies and kittens.
Damian: Die.
Barbara: Also, is Vin Diesel really bald?
Duke: I was curious.
Barbara: And how do I secretly commission my brother for a drawing of me as a cat?
Tim: Stop!
Barbara: I can, after I find a group underwater pilates class.
Bette: I need a new hobby, sue me.
Barbara: Of course, so you can invent new muscles.
Luke: I'm just saying, anything's possible.
Barbara: Hopefully you don't use those muscles to steal the crown jewel of the Tamaranean royal family.
Selina: I was on incognito!
Barbara: It's okay. At least you weren't looking up a compilation of Game of Thrones spoilers to put in the family group chat.
Alfred: I have no regrets.
Barbara: Neither should anyone who enjoys clamato juice so much they order five bottles.
Helena: It's for training purposes.
Barbara: By the way, does anyone need shirtless Arsenal pics?
Jason: Bruce, tell her to quit it.
Bruce: He's right. We get it, Barbara.
Barbara: I'll stop. Just send me the name of the Superman fanfiction you've been secretly reading between the hours of two and three-thirty A.M. this past week.
Bruce: Meeting dismissed. Everyone go home.
Harper: Ha, you didn't get mine.
Barbara: Don't worry, your OSHA impersonation Tumblr is safe with me.
When Dick started to spend more time with his team, and started to talk about Wally just as much as he talked about Starfire, Bruce knew that they needed to have a talk.
"I don't care if you like boys or girls", Bruce had said. "Just promise me that you won't date Oliver Queen's son."
Not that he had anything against Roy, Bruce just really did not want to deal with Oliver any more than he already had to.
"Sure", Dick had said, in a way that very clearly implicated that if Bruce ever annoyed him too much, he would do exactly that simply to spite him.
Jason was a lot easier in regards to relationships. No teams or teammates or relationship problems that roused from having several teenagers spending a lot of time together in close quarters. Compared to Dick, Jason always looked younger and smaller, and Bruce didn't even think about talking to him about it. Not yet. They still had time to do it.
They didn't.
Jason was gone, and then he was back, and Bruce really, really did not have the time or even thought to talk to him about dating girls or boys.
And maybe that wasn't even the part that they should've talked about. No, the part they should've talked about was not dating Oliver Queen's son.
Not that Bruce had anything against Roy. He smart and resourceful and respectful (he always volunteered to help Alfred every time he came to the Manor), and he was a good father. That was especially a quality that Bruce could respect. Roy was good to Jason, in seemingly every way that mattered.
It was just that now Bruce had to deal with Oliver. Well, not in a way that he had to see Oliver more often, but he certainly had to deal with him more. Especially since every single time Bruce and Jason had an argument, Jason would spend more time at Oliver and Dinah's place, and Oliver would every single time without fail rub it in to Bruce's face.
After one of said arguments that hit a bit too close to the Holidays, Bruce knew that he had to do something. He couldn't take Oliver's smug face from having all of his kids and one of Bruce's over at their place. Bruce needed to invite them over first. Jason would understand the invitation as the olive branch that it was.
He had called Jason, but it was Roy who picked up. That was good, actually. Roy was many times easier to talk to than Jason. At least he greeted Bruce normally instead of calling him an asshole right from the get-go.
"We could come visit", Roy said, and Bruce took it was the win it was. "I'm just pretty sure that you have something to say to Jason, first."
Bruce had many things to say to Jason all the time.
"Hn", he said.
"That last argument sounded pretty bad", Roy continued, calmly and sweetly. "I'm sure that both of you said things you didn't mean to, but just because you didn't mean them doesn't mean it's okay. So, is there something you would like to say to Jason?"
"Hn." Was Bruce on speaker? Jason hadn't said anything to indicate that he could hear Bruce.
"What's the word?" For a split second, it was like Alfred was on the other side of the line, and Bruce found himself speaking before he could think about it properly.
"I'm sorry", he said.
"Thank you!" Roy sounded like he was smiling widely. "We'll be there, then!"
Roy hung up. Bruce put his phone down, his head spinning slightly.
"I assume that Master Jason and Master Roy will be over, then?" Alfred asked.
"Yes", Bruce said.
"That is splendid to hear." Alfred patted Bruce on his arm. "Good man, that Master Roy. He has certainly read his books on parenting, it seems."
Bruce leaned on his desk, his mind reeling with the realisation that he had just been out-dadded by his son's boyfriend.
A good man, Alfred had said. Bruce couldn't do anything else but agree.
Do you have a masterlist for your batfam twitter au posts? I love reading them :3
I don't but I guess I can use this as one? I'm not making them consistently or anything, just when I wake up at 3am with a Vision
Batfam twitter masterpost
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Part 6
Part 7
(Secret part 7.5 I put on a reblog)
Part 8
Part 9
Part 10 to come (possibly)
Request in replies if you want to be added to the taglist for any new Batfam twitter posts
A Robin tradition
-
13 year old Jason: Dick, I need to borrow the Batmobile! Roy needs help with his English homework, Alfred is busy, and the Batmobile is the fastest car we have!
18 year old Dick: [is mad at Bruce and knows full well that this is going to piss him off] Say no more
[Dick gets the keys]
Dick: I'll hide the keys to the motorcycles and the plane. When Bruce tries to call you, just ignore him
Jason: [running to the car] Thanks, Dick! You're the best!
-
[Years later]
Tim: Jason please help me! I need the Batmobile to save Kon from Kryptonite Zombies!
Jason: 'Kay, try not to hit any pedestrians
Jason: [takes the Batmobile keys out of his pocket tosses them to Tim]
Tim: You just had them in your pocket...?
Jason: Zombies, Tim
Tim: Right! Thanks! [Runs away]
-
[Even more years later]
Damian: Drake! I require the Batmobile. Connor needs assist-
Tim: [already tossing Damian the keys] Cool, see ya later
Damian: [already running to the car] Thank you!
What’s your favorite interpretation of Thomas Wayne? As of now, mine is ‘parent who threatens you relentlessly but would snap if something actually happened to you’
Thomas sometimes takes Bruce to the hospital because A.) Alfred needs a break, and B.) he needs a little intern to fetch him things.
Except Bruce just keeps making grabby hands at all the scalpels and surture scissors. “Bruce, put that shit back down or I’ll knock the white off your teeth, sit down!”
Bruce doesn’t. Thomas doesn’t do shit, naturally.
“See?! See what I have to fucking deal with, Leslie?!”
“He tripped, by the way. “
She’s never seen Thomas run so fast since the night he met Martha, chasing down her car so he could propose to her.
Jason Todd was the type of kid to read a book in the backseat and use the intermittent street lights as his only source of light
Get scooped, idiot
Commission info / ko-fi
Idk what it is but I just love drawing Jason fighting for his life
Commission info / ko-fi
I think more people need to play around with Damian's speech. Don't get me wrong, I love the antiquated Victorian child style of speech, but also he's a teenager that swears plenty in the comics. We really need more scenes like:
Damian: Father, I regret to inform you that I have been assigned in-school suspension for the next three days.
Bruce: What, why?!
Damian: My classmate Kevin was disparaging a female classmate for turning him down, so I called him 'a rizz-less, basic-ass neckbeard bitch' and said I was going to fuck his mom and give her a son she'd actually love.
Bruce: *is completely speechless*
Damian: That is all I needed to tell you. If you will excuse me, I have homework to complete before dinner and patrol.
I am an avid lover of this webtoon
Batman: Wayne Family Adventures #132 - "Homebound" (2024)
written by CRC Payne art by Starbite, Vadynea, & Jace Camedon
Smoke break with your Crime Lord dad but it's not really a smoke break because you forgot your ex-dad works at night.
Silly thing I threw together... wow, something with sound this time. You might have to click onto it to actually see it properly, lmao. Did the expressions too small...
Ko-Fi. Song is Make Me Lose Control by Eric Carmen.
18 y/o Roy Harper and Donna Troy joining the Teen Titans with 13 y/o Dick Grayson and Wally West:
This is so dramatic of me but I hate hate hate the swear jar headcanon for Jason. Like holy shit sit down for two seconds and think of the implications of taking away money from a child that lived below the line of poverty for all their life and was homeless for three years if they do something you don't like. Are you insane
Take my money. I beg you.
So I didn't make these hoodies themselves, but what I did do was cut out shapes from other hoodies, then stitched them to the base ones. I love the design of the first one, but I'm more proud of the second because the hood and pocket were included.
February 2022
The batkids would absolutely work together if they had news they needed to tell Bruce but didn’t know how. One of the batkids would put in the group chat that they needed help breacking news to Bruce and everyone would pull out their own story’s so Bruce can’t stress out about whatever it is that needed to be told to him. So like this:
Jason: ugh how do I tell Bruce I’m dating roy and he now has a grandchild.
Steph: Infodump?
Jason agreeing: infodump
Then all the batkids would give Bruce the most random piece of information he has no way of processing till later so he can’t focus on the fact he now has a gay son and a grandchild (gotta love Lian). Everyone would pull out the most random facts like;
Dick: remember when I was 12 and didn’t talk to you for a month and only slept in Alfred’s room? Yea well that’s because my pet hamster you didn’t know about died.
Damian: I first ever killed Someone when I was 2 years old and thew up peanuts on someone who had Anaphylaxis.
Duke: I used to have a red string board about Batman’s identity and I would have been right if it wasn’t for the fact the robins kept changing.
Cass: when I was homeless I broke into ever house in Gotham including Wayne manor.
Tim: *mentions literally anything that happened in yj98*
Babs: my fathers known you were Batman since before I was batgirl.
Steph: my first costume came from the scraps of fabric that my father used to try and make me his sidekick.
Bruce never knows how to prosess any of the information and thus never reacts negatively because there is always at least one piece of information he didn’t know that throws him off.
