GraffArt Shop X Fruits Basket ~ Rainy Season

GraffArt Shop x Fruits Basket ~ Rainy Season

the heir & the emissary

Eris Vanserra x OC (estranged Archeron sister)

PROLOGUE

// 8 months post-UTM //

Eris stopped breathing.

The pull was instantaneous. This tugging in his chest, impossible to ignore. He blinked once, twice and then sucked in a gasping breath as if returning to the surface of water. 

He couldn’t look away. She was beautiful with long, pale blonde hair which fell in waves down her lithe back. Her knee length, black coat cinched at the waist; accentuating her good figure. Her head was turned slightly towards him as she laughed at something a passerby had said to her. Her bright white teeth on display, eyes and nose scrunched up and a loud, joyful sound emitting from her. She looked absolutely radiant.

He watched as this woman wrenched open the door to the tavern and stepped inside, disappearing from his view.

“Sir, is everything alright?” one of his guards spoke up, having come to stop a few feet from him. Eris hadn’t realized he’d stopped walking and was now standing in the middle of the cobbled road, staring into the distance.

“Yes, everything is fine. We have much more of this town to check on before sundown but I am suddenly feeling incredibly parched. Let’s stop for a drink before we carry on.”

____

Stepping into the tavern, Eris was immediately greeted with the familiar scent of cinnamon. His shoulders sagged as the tension of a long day of travel began to bleed out of him. He took a moment to look about the room; his eyes roving over the few patrons who had gone eerily still at the sight of him. He ignored their wide eyes and rigid bodies as he searched the small space. There she was.

She was seated at a table in the front of the room, a steaming cup sat on the table in front of her. She had her small, dainty hands wrapped around the mug as she stared out of a nearby window. 

“You all get a drink and find a table. I’ll be back in a bit.” His guards easily recognized his dismissal and headed off to the bar for drinks. Eris made his way towards her slowly.

He had just begun to approach her table when she glanced up at him, a small smile gracing her fair-skinned face. 

“The heir to the Autumn court. To what do I owe the pleasure?” Her voice was like honey. Her blue-gray eyes stared up at him in a piercing gaze.

“Ah, it seems you have me at a disadvantage.” He spoke. She extended her hand in greeting, which Eris immediately took into his own. He lowered himself into a bow and pressed his lips to her knuckles. “I have been making my rounds through some of the local villages to make sure they are doing well and I saw you come into the tavern. You are absolutely stunning and I just needed to know your name…” he trailed off, raising back into a standing position.

“Tegan. My name is Tegan. I am an emissary for the Winter court.” She replied. Her smile grew wider as she motioned to the empty seat across from her. Eris quickly took the invitation.

“Well, Tegan, it is a pleasure to meet you. May I ask what brings you to the Autumn court?” Eris asked, settling into his seat. He folded his hands together, fingers interwoven, upon the tabletop. Tegan raised her mug to the barkeep signaling for another as she dipped her head in his direction. He took a moment to observe her. She had an ethereal beauty about her, shining as bright as the Sun with sharp, pointed features. She wore a braid in her hair, running across her scalp like a band, covering her ears.

“I came to Autumn in hopes of meeting with someone of power. Preferably someone handsome, regal, if a little ostentatious. If I’m lucky, maybe it will be someone who will sweep me off my feet in a forbidden, whirlwind romance.” She breathed. A small, wistful smile adorned her face. “Do you think you can get me an audience with your father?”

Eris watched her from across the table with a look of horror. Tegan burst into laughter, tipping her head to the side and he caught a glimpse of what she was no doubt attempting to hide beneath the braid. Rounded ears.

“I jest!” She exclaimed. Eris’ expression morphed into a deadpan stare. “You are just the person I am looking for. Viviane sent me to speak with you. I have no official business on this trip beyond introducing myself, that you and your court may recognize me in the future.” His lips twitched upward as the barkeep approached the table and slid a drink in front of him. Even as he gave his thanks, his eyes remained on Tegan.

“Well then, I believe you have completed your task. In any case, it seems a beautiful woman has ordered me a drink and it would be terribly rude for me to leave now without getting to know her.” He did not feel the need to mention that he would have stayed regardless. He felt an odd sense of comfort, sitting here with her. It was a foreign feeling to him; one he was not nearly ready to let go of.

“Yes, I imagine that would seem rather callous. It looks as though you will be stuck here, with no choice but to waste away your afternoon with her.” Tegan winked. 

And so they spoke…about their courts, about themselves, about the meaning of life, about anything and everything. They smiled, laughed, and drank. Hours passed in the blink of an eye. And when the sun began to set below the horizon and the tavern grew dim, they rose from their table. 

Despite having not completed the task he’d set for himself that day, Eris had never felt so light. In all his years of living, he had never felt so free. 

“Tegan, it was a pleasure to meet you.” He stated, helping her to shrug on her coat. He glanced around the tavern, giving a small nod to his guards to let them know it was time to leave.

“The pleasure was all mine, Eris.” There it was again. That tugging in his chest, which pulled taut at the sound of his name on her lips. She smiled up at him, peering through her lashes. “Hopefully I will see you again soon.” She placed her hand on her chest, rubbing in a small circular motion and he knew then that she had felt it too.

Eris held open the door with one hand and allowed her to step out into the crisp night air before him. He took her hand in his once more, placing a chaste kiss against her knuckles. “I will be counting down the days.” 

I am once again playing through Heavensward and I am frothing at the mouth, counting down the minutes until I get to see my one true love again. 

Lord Commander, Ser Aymeric De Borel.

her smile

azriel x reader

summary: Y/N is having a rough time, Azriel doesn’t know how to help her... until he does (angst, friends to lovers, Archeron!reader).

word count: 3k

warnings: grief, despair

a/n: I swear I have not abandoned ‘the heir & the emissary’. I’ve been going through some personal stuff lately and haven’t had it in me to write lately until this idea sparked my inspiration. I’ll be getting back to that story soon.

————

The corners of his mouth ticked up as he looked around the room and saw nothing but smiles. It was a cold night in Velaris and the inner circle was gathered at the townhouse enjoying a relaxing night together, filled with liquor and laughter. It had become increasingly rare that everyone was able to get together like this.

“I can’t believe Y/N’s finally coming home tomorrow. Definitely wasn’t expecting her mission to keep her away for so long.” Mor stated, gaining the rooms full attention.

“It’ll be awesome to have her back, it’s been a bit lonely without my partner in crime. I’m excited.” Cassian exclaimed, “though probably not quite as excited as Az.” A smirk overtook his face as he turned toward his brother.

Azriel scoffed, rolling his eyes good-naturedly, but was ultimately unable to keep the smile from spreading across his face.

He had missed her terribly. He missed her infectious laughter, her shining eyes and the way she never failed to make him feel seen. But most of all, he missed her bright smile. The one she saved just for him. The kind of smile that lit up a room and always reached her eyes. It never failed to make his heart flutter. From the moment he met her, the eldest Archeron sister had whittled her way into his heart and had quickly become his closest confidant. The two had become inseparable and the way she so easily slipped into the empty spaces of his life, making him finally feel whole, never ceased to amaze him. Despite the trauma she had suffered, she always remained the bright sunshine capable of lighting up his dark world.

“Yes, well none of us expected the clean up efforts to go on for quite so long,” Rhys handed a freshly filled glass to Azriel as he took a seat on the couch beside him, pulling Feyre into his lap. “When I originally asked her to lend her gifts to aid those in need, I only thought she’d be gone a few weeks. Certainly not a few months.”

Before anyone else could speak on the topic, the air seemed to ripple around them and Lucien stepped out of nothingness. He wore an uncharacteristically grim expression and his hair seemed disheveled, as though he has been nervously running his fingers through it. Azriel was immediately on edge.

“I’m glad you’re all here because I need to talk to you,” he stated.

“Lucien. What brings you here tonight? I thought you were meant to be picking up Y/N?” Rhys raised one brown in question.

“That’s what I need to talk to you about. She’s-” Lucien set out a long sigh. He turned to the cabinet and pulled out a glass, quickly popping open the nearest bottle and filling the it. “She’s… well I’m not really sure how to explain it.”

“Okay, you seem stressed. Take a breath and then tell us what has you so bothered. Is Y/N okay?” Feyre sat up in Rhys’ lap, the tension of the room beginning to escalate. Her oldest sister has always been her anchor, keeping her grounded. Through thick and thin, any problem Feyre had she always knew Y/N would be there to help her through it. For as close as Nesta and Elain had been, her and Y/N had been thick as thieves.

“Physically? Yes. Mentally? Not even close.” Lucien exhaled and his shouldered sagged.

Azriel sat up straighter, his shadows beginning to move around him in an agitated fashion. His heart rate picked up and sweat started to gather on his palms. “What do you mean?” He asked, voice rougher than usual.

“I had gone there tonight with the intention of helping her gather her belongings and prepare for the trip home but I barely even made it through the door when the head healer pulled me aside. She said Y/N’s healing had some… unforeseen side effects. Essentially, from what she could gather, every time Y/N uses her energy to heal, she absorbs the energy of those around her to create a balance. In normal circumstances this would probably be fine but doing it in the healers tents of an old battle field… well she’s been surrounded by nothing by grief and death all these months. She’s been taking it all in and now…” His sentence trailed off. He ran is hands through his hair, staring down at his feet.

“And now?” Cassian asked. The room was so quiet even a human could hear a pin drop.

“She doesn’t speak. She doesn’t laugh. She doesn’t really do much of anything but stare off into nothing. And her eyes, Gods, her eyes. They’re so lifeless, it’s like an empty shell of who she was.” Lucien felt a shiver run through him at the thought of her eyes, the way she had looked at him when he saw her for the first time. “I’m going back tomorrow morning to pick her up, but I had to let you all know so you aren’t shocked when you see her.”

Azriel froze, back stiff and eyes wide. His shadows were moving in a frenzy around him. His grip tightened on the glass he was holding as his knuckles turned white. That couldn’t be right.

Nobody spoke, the room a silent stillness. No one knew what to say.

————

The inner circle gathered around the dining room table. A low rumble of conversation consumed them, much more tame than what would usually be expected at a family dinner. The tension could be cut with a knife. Each member sat rigidly in their seat, unsure of what to expect upon her arrival.

Suddenly the sound of the front door opening could be heard reverberating through the house and the soft sound of footsteps followed in its wake. Azriel took a deep breath as his eyes connected with Mor who sat directly across from him. She gave him a tight-lipped smile. His heart was racing and sweat was beading on the back of his neck. His shadows were restless too, swarming him in a fit of nervousness.

Lucien appeared first, a small smile gracing his lips. “Hello everyone,” he stated as he sat down in the empty seat beside Elain. As he sat down, everyone’s eyes moved the body which had been previously hidden behind him. And there she was.

Y/N’s stood in the dining room entry way, straight as a board with her hands clasped behind her back. Her frame appeared thinner than he remembered and even her hair seemed to lack its usual liveliness. But in the end, it was her eyes that caused his heart to clench. They were empty and unseeing, as though she were staring through them.

He stood from his seat, the silent tension beginning to get to him. Nobody spoke. He pulled out the empty seat next to him and the sound caused her head to turn in his direction. Their gazes met and for moment, they simply stared at each other. Then she began to move as she swiftly and silently she settled into the seat beside him. Still, no words were spoken.

“We’re so happy you’re home!” Feyre exclaimed, allowing a large smile to spread across her face. Y/N turned her head in Feyre’s direction but said nothing. No smile graced her lips, no light sparked in her eyes.

Nothing.

“Remember us? Your sisters. You’re not even going to say ‘hello’ to us?” Nesta spoke up, irritation beginning to creep up her spine.

Nothing.

“I missed you Sunshine,” Cassian tried his hand. A warm smile upon his face as he looked at her. “Turns out, these losers aren’t nearly as fun to prank without you there to assist me.”

Nothing.

Azriel simply stared at her. His eyes were locked onto the side of her head as his heart began to fill with dread. His stomach felt as though it had been filled with lead. He reach out and grabbed her hand beneath the table as it sat in her lap.

Please. He begged. Please react. Do something, anything. He prayed to any Gods that may be listening.

Still, nothing.

Cassian looked across the table to his brother and winced. Through all the trials and tribulations they had faced, he had never seen Azriel look as distressed as he did now. His body was stiff with tension and even his shadows were pulled in tight. A pained expression adorned his face and his eyes were wide with horror, tears gathering along his lower lashes. He would not take his eyes off her. Despite all attempts, Y/N remained unmoving, blankly staring at the wooden table before her. All the while, Az steadfastly refused to let go of her hand. He had no idea if she even knew he was there but he hoped that maybe, in some small way, he was providing her some comfort.

————

And that’s how the weeks carried on. No emotions, no speech. Y/N remained as she was, floating through each day like a ghost.

The inner circle got to work.

Each person took turns to dig through archives and books looking for any sign of how to fix it. Rhys reached out to Helion in the hope that maybe, somewhere among his massive library, they would find a solution.

Azriel spent every waking moment he could either sitting beside her and speaking in soft tones or scouring countless books. There had to be an answer, if only he could find it.

Come to my office. Azriel heard his brothers voice in his mind and he let out a small sigh, shutting the book before him. Another waste.

Upon entering Rhys’ office he found both his brothers already seated. They each gave him a small smile as he took a seat beside them. Rhys leaned forward with his arms on his desk and his fingers crossed before him.

“I spoke with Helion about the situation and he believes he understands what is happening. Though we have yet to find a solution.”

Azriel stared across the desk at his brother, silently prompting him to continue.

“He believes that she’s burnt out much of her ability to heal and replaced that empty well with death, despair and grief. It had become such a common occurrence for her, that her body no longer registers those things as separate emotions. Essentially her baseline has been reprogrammed to those feelings.”

“So, she’s feeling grief and despair in a never-ending loop at all moments of the day? To the extent that it’s become her new normal?” Azriel spoke in a voice softer, sadder, than either Rhys or Cassian had ever heard before.

Rhys let out a small sigh, “essentially yes. We don’t have a set solution yet but Helion believes that if we can find a way to help her expel those emotions and surround her with comfort, we may be able to reverse it.”

Azriel’s eyes clenched tightly shut and his head dropped low, supported by his hands as his elbows rested on his knees. He hunched over as his shoulders began to shake violently. Both Cassian and Rhys shot up from their seats and made their way over to their brother. They crouched down beside him on either side and brought comforting hands up to his back.

“She’s always been there for me. When I’m feeling lost and alone she’s alway been able to pull me out of that darkness. This time she needs me and I can’t even help her. I don’t know how to fix this,” Azriel sobbed. “I can feel her withering away. Help me. Please. I don’t know what to do for her.”

His brothers locked eyes over his back and they shared a sad look. They had never heard Azriel beg before, had never heard him plead for help. Not like this.

“We’ll find a way to help her. I promise you, we will not stop until we find a way to make it right,” Rhys swore to him.

————

Surrounding her with love and support was the first plan set in motion. Even still, there was no progress. Mor took her shopping, Nesta brought her to spend time with Gwyn and Emerie. Even Elain tried to get her to garden alongside her. Nothing worked. She sat in silence, eyes blank.

The whole inner circle had once again gathered at the townhouse for another night in. Y/N was settled on the couch with her back pressed against the armrest and her knees pulled up to her chest. Her head was leaning against the back of the couch as she stared silently out the front window. The others were scattered around the living room, some taking part in a rowdy card game and others chatting quietly but Azriel couldn’t focus on anything but her. His eyes never strayed from her form, hoping against all odds that somehow she would respond to anything.

Rhys was sat next to him on the couch adjacent to the one Y/N sat upon. He leaned his head closer to his brother to hear him speak.

“I’m sending Amren to Day court tomorrow in the hopes she can go through some more of the books in the library there. Hopefully we get some good news soon.” Azriel nodded slowly; he wasn’t hopeful. He took another sip of his drink, and allowed himself a moment of calm. A moment to relax. And then it happened.

His shadows exploded out of him at the first sign of his hold on them loosening. He’d been keeping them so tightly wound in an effort to not startle her that as soon as his hold on them slackened they shot out towards her. His shadows swarmed her, covering Y/N completely and sheltering her from the world. He stood up quickly, ready to pull them back into him and apologize for their behavior. Before he could make a move though, he heard a small noise. Everyone went silent.

There it was again. A small, wet noise. A sniffle. Then, a hand shot out from the thick darkness, fingers making a grabbing motion.

“Azriel?” That voice. He knew that voice. His whole body froze, shock taking over him. “Azriel, please.” He moved with swiftness, reaching into the darkness and scooping her up, sitting on the couch and pulling her into his lap. He felt her thin fingers latch onto his shirt, holding on as though he were the only thing tethering her to this world. And then she began to sob. Loud, keening wails escaped her as she buried her face into his neck.

Nobody moved for fear of ruining this moment. It was what she needed, to expel these emotions.

“I-I want to go home,” she pleaded and she had barely even finished her request when they were swallowed up by darkness and carried off into the night.

A moment of silence passed over the group before Mor spoke up. “Where is he taking her? This is her home, she lives here.”

Cassian let out a huff, a little smile resting on his lips. “They’re in his room. She always used to call it home. I’m not sure how I seem to be the only who’s ever noticed but she basically lived in there with him.”

“What? Since when?” Feyre asked.

“For a long time. She always called this the townhouse or just ‘the house’ but his room, she always referred to it as home. From almost the beginning she started staying in there. They’d stay up late into the night talking. And then, slowly, her stuff just started migrating in there. If you don’t believe me, go look in her room. It’s barren.” Cassian smiled, widely this time. It thrilled him to know he’d been the only one observant enough to pick up on this fact.

“Do you think they’re like, together? Is that why he’s been taking this so hard? I just thought they were really close friends.” Feyre asked again, brows furrowing.

“Honestly, darling… I’m pretty positive they’re mates.” Feyre gasped.

“He told you that?!”

“No, not directly… but he didn’t have too. He was upset about the situation the other night and he said he could feel her withering away. I don’t think he even realized he said it, but he told us he could feel her.” And at that, smiles spread across each of their faces. Finally, they thought, the two people who deserved that kind of never ending, all-encompassing love, more than anyone were finally receiving it.

————

Azriel and Y/N reemerged in his bedroom. Silence surrounding them and only the sound of her short gasping breaths filling the space. He kept her tucked against him as he sat back on his bed against the headrest. She sat sideways between his legs, one of his arms wrapped around her waist and the other buried in her hair. He kept her head pressed close to him, his lips against her forehead.

“I’m here, love. I’m here for you.” He murmured against her skin, his eyes falling shut as salty tears ran down his cheeks and dripped off his chin into her hair. This was how they spent the remainder of their night; wrapped up in each other. They clung to each other as though the world might tear them apart at any moment.

“Thank you for being with me. I could hear you there with me, feel you with me, everyday. Not just when you were sitting with me but all the time. I can always feel you, and it helped more than I can ever truly tell you.” She whispered to him. She pulled back from where she had been tucked into the crook of his neck to look at him and felt a hard pull in her chest. And then a resounding snap.

Azriel gasped audibly as he stared down at her, wide eyed. A grin took over his face and he tucked her gently back against him. “I’m so happy I could help you in any small way like you’ve always done for me. And I will continue to be here for you, to love and cherish you always. For however long and any way you’ll have me.” She pulled back from him once more.

And then she smiled at him. Big and bright and stunningly beautiful. She was smiling at him once again.

nervous

azriel x reader

summary: inspired by Nervous (The Ooh Song) by Gavin James & Mark McCabe

word count: 2k

warnings: angst, war

a/n: Part two can be found here: All My Heart (part ii) Enjoy!

————

“Azriel!” You squealed, high-pitched and shrill. A breathy laugh escaped your throat as you hung, bent at the waist, over the Shadowsinger’s left shoulder. Your hands found purchase amongst his lower back as you pushed yourself further upright. “Where are we going?”

He did not deign to respond, breathing out a low chuckle instead. The sound ricocheted down your spine and your skin prickled with anticipation. A swift smack landed on your rear and you let out a small yelp of shock before falling back into another fit of laughter.

Azriel had made a habit of this over the last few months you’d known him. You had met him back in summer, when a few young Windhaven soldiers had come to your neighboring camp. The moment you had met his piercing hazel eyes you knew you were well and truly fucked. In that moment, you swore you would follow him anywhere. It was a thought that frightened you for a brief minute. Then, this gorgeous male opened his mouth and his voice poured out like warm honey, rich and soothing. You found that all semblance of fear had bled away into complete contentment. And he had spent every free moment with you since.

On most days now you could count on him showing up in the evening when the sun began to sink below the horizon, having slipped away after a long day of training. He’d scoop you up and haul you off to some forest picnic or mountainside view where you’d spend the night cuddled against him to escape the harsh winter chill, wings just barely touching, laughing and kissing without a care in the world.

Azriel set you down, feet touching the snow-covered ground, on a cliff side you had come to know well and his shadows dispersed through the tree line, keeping an ever-watchful eye on things. A few logs remained piled up in front of a large fallen tree, the remnants of the last small fire you had made just a few nights ago. A small smile pulled at your lips as you glanced over at him. He sat atop the log, wings held wide open behind him to block the winter wind as he cast an expectant look in your direction, preening as he watched your eyes rake over the massive sprawl of them. Rolling your eyes playfully, you made your way over the the logs, grabbing the matches from his grip as you passed by.

You crouched down before the log pile, casting your wings open as well in an attempt to stop any stray wind blowing in the opposite direction and not allowing yourself to glance up at the male before you. You could feel his lingering gaze on you and were grateful for the distraction that lighting the fire had given you, hoping it would allow for the calming of your racing heart. Despite spending months now in his close company, you never failed to feel nervous around him. Every moment you spent with him had your palms sweating, chest aching and your stomach tied in knots. Even now, you were practically shivering and shaking at the knees.

Finally, the fire began to crackle before you. You took a deep breath, a sorry attempt to slow your heartbeat to a healthy rhythm and looked back up at him. His lingering gaze was as intense as it always was and his mouth was turned upward in small, knowing smirk. That bastard, he knows exactly what he’s doing.

Gliding over to him, you placed yourself between his parted knees and his hands came up to grip your hips as he looked up at you. You placed one hand on his shoulder, allowing the other hand to move slowly upward and brush back a loose lock of hair that had hung low over his forehead. His eyes fluttered shut at the gentle touch, his fingers flexing at your sides and he leaned forward, placing his chin upon your navel and breathing out a small sigh of contentment. His arms looped around your waist, pulling you closer to him and he buried his face in your stomach. Suddenly you caught a small mumbling sound and you let out a short laugh, “I can’t hear you.”

Azriel pulled back, his head tilting back to look up at you again with bright eyes, “I said, I missed you.” You smiled down at him, a large grin taking over your face, and you cupped both his cheeks between your small hands. You leaned down, pressing a small kiss to his forehead and murmured against his skin, “I missed you too.”

You moved over to sit beside him as the warmth from both the fire and his touch spread through you. Your cheeks were stained a bright red. Though whether it was from the frigid nighttime air or Azriel lavishing you in attention you could not be certain. “How was training today?”

He let out a long sigh, staring into the flames as his brows pinched together. “Training was rough today, more strenuous than usual. There have been whispers of war on the horizon, human rebellions against their slavers.” You felt a shiver travel down your spine, the images of blood and death flashing behind your eyelids as you allowed your head to tilt sideways resting upon his shoulder. Reaching out you grasped his hand in yours, happy that he no longer flinched away from the contact as he once had, and set them on your thigh. He gave your hand a small squeeze.

“Do you think the rumors are true? Do you believe war is coming?” Your voice was small, barely a whisper on the wind. He heard you all the same. He turned his head to face you, and caught your lips in a light kiss.

“Yes,” he replied and gave your hand another squeeze, harder this time. You squeezed back in acknowledgment of what you both knew to be true, but would never speak aloud. Your time together was limited.

————

The alarm sounds rang out across the camp as hundreds of Illyrians emerged from their tents and cabins. Mothers, sisters and wives were frantically searching for their family members, helping to strap leathers and blades to them as quickly as they could. The time for war had come.

Dread pooled low in your stomach as you watched your brother don his fighting leathers. He sheathed a dagger to each thigh and slid his sword into place against his back. He took one last look at you and you gave him a small nod, lips pressed firmly together to keep yourself from begging him to stay. His gaze slid to your mother and he reached out to run the back of his fingers over her cheek. Then, without speaking a word, he turned his back to you and walked away.

You turned to your mother and could see the tears gathering along her lower lashes. But as any good Illyrian wife or mother or sister was meant to do in times of war, she did not allow them to fall. In the blink of an eye, she took a breath, pushed her shoulders back and steeled herself against the onslaught of sadness. A look of understanding passed between you two and she headed back for your home.

You heard a thud behind you and knew who it was before you even turned. You stood frozen, your back to him and your shoulders hunched over. You body was pulled taut. How can I possibly look him in the eye? How can I stand here before him and fight every urge I have telling me to fall to my knees and beg him to stay?

“Y/N. Please look at me.” His voice was a quiet whisper behind you and you felt his hand grip your shoulder, pulling your body around to face him. You only met his sorrowful eyes for a moment, before he was pulling you against his chest tightly. Azriel buried his face in your hair and allowed his eyes to fall shut, breathing in the scent of you.

You stood like this for a few moments, basking in the feeling of safety that being wrapped up in one another provided each of you. Slowly, gently, his hands grabbed onto your upper arms and pulled you back from him. His eyes raked over your face as yours did his. Desperately trying to memorize every detail of the look and feel of each other.

Another loud blaring horn sounded off in the distance. The final call to arms. He looked into your eyes for the last time and opened his mouth to speak. “I lo-”

You quickly brought a hand to his mouth and shook your head, blinking rapidly to hold back your tears. You felt his mouth shut behind your palm and you pulled your hand away. His own came up to tangle in your hair and he pulled you back to him, pressing his lips to yours in a bruising kiss, one that he desperately hoped conveyed all the feelings he no longer had the time to say. You pulled away from him, pressing one more small, soft kiss to his lips and stepped back out of his hold. Your eyes met his again and he knew you understood. Then, without speaking a word, he too turned his back to you and walked away.

————

Years had come and gone. He couldn’t believe it had been that long, that so much time had passed him by. The war was lengthy and many did not make it home. He considered himself amongst the lucky ones to know he and his brothers still drew breath in this world.

He landed roughly in the snow and glanced around the desolate wasteland before him. It was all that remained of your camp. A few families who braved the harshness of the Steppes together but little else was left. He took tentative steps towards your home, praying that your smiling face would greet him as you always had. He wanted to throw you over his shoulder again and fly you off to Velaris, his home now, where he could keep you safe, and finally speak those words he longed to utter all those years ago.

He raised his hand and knocked on the door to the small cabin, but did not hear any noise from within. Raising his hand to the glass window, he attempted to peer inside.

“You won’t find anyone in there,” a voice rang out behind him. He whirled around and his gaze fell upon a young female who was looking at him with distrustful eyes. “You’re looking for Y/N, yes?” He nodded his head in response, shoving his hands into his pockets and tucking his wings in tight.

The female narrowed her eyes at him in suspicion but continued on, “you won’t find her here. Her brother died in the war and her mother shortly after. When things started going south around here, the camp lord made some changes. Since she had no family left here, she was sent somewhere else, married most likely. But I can’t tell you where. None of us who remain here, know.”

Azriel startled at the news, reeling back in horror. Panic began to overwhelm his senses and his shadows gathered around him in a flurry. You could be anywhere in the world, how would he possibly find you now. He felt as though the world was beginning to crash down around him at the thought of you being married off to gods knows who and sent to gods knows where. With no further thought he allowed his shadows to carry him off into the night, sadness overtaking him.

Unknowingly, his shadows had carried him to that little mountain side cliff. The large tree still sat toppled over before a small pit of charred Earth. The air was still around him, the night completely silent, like moment frozen in time.

Azriel sank down onto the log and allowed his head to fall into his hands. He had lost you. The greatest joy in his life, and he had let it slip through his fingers like sand. The winter wind whipped around him and he realized it was infinitely colder on his own.