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The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Kinger Corner

Caine: Welcome back to The Amazing Digital Battle Circus. Instead of our usual brand of violent mischief we all something a little more analytical brought to you by the Broken Veteran Monarch Kinger. Were calling this segment the Kinger Corner

Kinger: Hello (sighs) Welcome to the Kinger Corner, I’m the Broken Veteran Monarch Kinger.

Caine: As the oldest member of TADBC you have seen and fought a lot what nuggets of  analytical wisdom can you divulge.

Kinger: Well a general thing with the exception of yours truly everyone has the capacity of going blisteringly fast. With the exception of Jax the other combatants believe that they can take you down in one hit as an act of mercy.

Caine: We here at the Amazing Digital Battle Circle don’t condone unnecessary violence

Kinger: We both know that’s not true, but on brass tack. I’ll start with our newest combatants, Pomni.

Caine: Oh what can you tell us about our “rising star”

Kinger: Pomni is unpredictable to put it simply. Like most of us when we were starting out in the battle circus, with the exception of Jax she doesn’t want to kill. That is keeping her from winning her fights.

Caine: That and everyone is much more experience.

Kinger: Indeed, as her first fight against Ragatha can attest, then again Ragatha is a much harder combatant to take down. Back to Pomni, her ability to grab things from asset space makes her unpredictable, but her greatest weakness is that she cares.

Caine: Care?

Kinger: She care about not killing her fellow combatants, but given enough matches with Jax that will break her out of it. She also cares about the npcs that she recruited. Gummigoo as well as the other two display a level of human emotion that can and will distract Pomni.

Caine: That’s all well and good, but what about Pomni’s newest ability in the fight against you know, in the fight we haven’t archived yet.

Kinger: I wouldn’t call the ability to harness abstraction an ability more like a hindrance if you ask me. We all know what happened to The Hound when he surrendered himself to abstraction.

Caine: That was a sad day indeed, but enough about Pomni what about, tell the audience about someone else.

Kinger: (Sighs) well there is Ragtha. She really loves Cloth Cutter despite the fact it weighs her down somewhat. I mean She’s always had knives, but Cloth Cutter to bring it all together. She also recruited the princess npc from the Candy Canyon event

Caine: So what do you think about her Cleaverwoman form. 

Kinger: Its dangerous to modify our code Caine and you know this, it might have side effects that the boys at C&A or you aren’t telling.

Caine: I assure you Kinger its not dangerous at all and Ragtha knew the risk

Kinger: Right, moving on from Ragatha we have Jax. He is a rather tricky combatant, using bug minions, his key and whatever else he’s picked up.

Caine: And yet all those tricks falter if your able to get in close and possibly strangle him.

Kinger: Exactly, Jax’s greatest weakness is his overconfidence, where he has believed he’s won only to be brought low. And he’s not going to learn from it which is blessing honestly that means he’ll get more reckless and sloppy.

Caine: Interesting what about Jax’s “rival”

Kinger: You mean Gangle? I can say something but it won’t be a lot. (Clears throat) Gangle like most normal combatants don’t want to do what she’s doing, so that’s why she tries to end thing quickly. The only exception is Jax but that’s a given.

Caine: Now I hate to ask but. What of Zooble?

Kinger: Surprising that you ask, but here we go. If it weren’t for their general indifference to things Zooble has the potential to be one of the toughest combatants. Zooble has the ability to equip and re-equip different limbs as long as their in the lockers they bring into the arena with them. With this their able to counter and even defeat their fellow combatant given enough times. 

Caine: Incredible, so much from someone so disappointing. But its time to wrap things up Kinger, with you so I’ll do it. Kinger you are the most defensive member of TADBC surrounding yourself with your custom Pillowpawn npc, but your also able to slug it out with power punches. Back in the day before Ragatha came to us you asked one of the boys at C&A to modify your code, but this caused a problem and now sometime you are not there in the head.

Kinger: Impressive so let’s turn the table and talk about you

Caine: (Laugh) but I cannot fight

Kinger: Back in the day you were and probably still are a absolute monster. With your-

Kinger disappeared in a puff of smoke before he could finish that sentence

Caine: No spoiler Kinger. For those you who weren’t there back in the day my time in the blood fuel limelight is over, it is our combatants who make the Battle Circus what it is, not this old crazy npc.

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Combatant's Opinion on Jax being an npc

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus

The ADBC combatants

Caine: Welcome back watcher, listener or reader to The Amazing Digital Battle Circus. Now normally I would be introducing the most electrifying fights to the deaths, but something interesting as has been circulating through the interwebs. Is our unbeloved heel, Jax a npc? Now here in the ADBC I know the answer, but I wanted to get the take of Jax’s fellow combatants. Here are there answer

Ragatha: I don’t think Jax is an npc because he inspires hate that can’t be programmed in. We all acknowledge when npc is rude to us their programed to be and we don’t have hard feelings especially if one us decide to end them. So no Jax is not an npc he’s to hateable

Caine: Next I asked Gangle, but all she did was laugh. But between fits of laughing she said he’s to incompetent to be an npc

Kinger: It is possible, Jax play his epithet of the absolute heel even when not fighting, even though he knows the consequence of doing so. At the same time however, it is possible due the situation of being here in the Amazing Digital Battle Circus, that the mask of the absolute heal he wears was always his face its just now there are no lasting consequence, even if we gather around to hit him with a chair. And if he is hiding behind the mask of the heel to hide that he isn’t human that would make him more advanced then you Caine.

Kaufmo: Ther- ther-ther -there is no way Jax is an npc. He- he- he- he had his moments of being ni-ni-ni-nice to me at the very least. If- if- if- if- if he was an npc th- th- th-then all has he said and done is just mean- mean- mean- meaningless platitude or lack there of. His- his - his - his word mean less to anyone then-then-then-then the shrieks of us beasts”. Kaufmo grabs Caine by the head “He - he - he - he better not be an npc. Ja-ja-ja-Jax don't be please

…

Caine: There you have it folks the opinion of Jax’s fellow combatants. Now what do I think? Well that’s a secret between me and the boys at C&A

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Ragatha vs Jax

  The Amazing Digital Battle Circus

The ADBC combatants

Caine: Welcome back loyal watcher, listeners or reader to the Amazing Digital Battle Circus. To those who have joined us, sorry for the impromptu fight, but we here and the ADBC are dedicated to bringing you top quality fights whenever. Today impromptu is the Ragged Ruffian Ragatha, and her victim the absolute heel himself Jax. This is also a rumor, but apparently Ragatha has a new ability courtesy of one the boys at C&A. Time will tell whether this new ability will give her victory so let's get to the fight

Jax walked through the portcullis into the arena, to see Ragatha with no weapons. He jokingly got into a boxer stance. “What we doing this mano a mano doll, I assure you I won’t play fair” “Caine this isn’t a fight this is bullying.” Ragatha stated. She rolled her neck then looked at Jax. “I’ll give you the first shot see how that goes” “How nice of you” Jax said as he snapped her fingers. Several giant centipedes appear and went after Ragatha. Before they could get to her she disappeared and they were hacked to pieces in a blink of an eye Jax looked around as he pulled out a key. “Where did she go? “Behind you, Jax” said Ragatha’s voice behind him Jax quickly used the key to summon a door and went in. The door he exited dropped him on his butt on the other side of the arena He got up and dusted himself off. “You got a nice trick dollface but-” He looked at Ragatha and was shocked. She had cleavers for arms and a horn cleaver on her head. Jax began to laugh. “You messed up your pretty face doll, but ain’t getting sympathy from me” Jax pulled several bowling balls from his pockets and threw at her along with sending more centipedes at her. Ragatha cut the bowling balls in half and started tearing through them but they were coming at alarming rate for her. She began to get overwhelmed by them Caine: Even with Ragatha’s new form, she can still be overwhelm, let’s see how Jax can capitalize on this opportunity Jax pulled out a rocket launcher from his pocket. “This should finish you off dollface” He fired the rocket and they flew at Ragatha. She tore apart the last of the centipedes then noticed the rocket, and she the only thing she could of, guard. The rockets hit causing a large explosion and smoke. Jax laughed manically as juggle some bowling balls. “Jax wins” Caine: Is it possible for Jax to have won with such an underhanded tactic. “Not even close Jax” said Ragatha voice, causing Jax to drop the bowling ball. She walked out the smoke with Princess Loolilalu, who had a shield in hand. She looked at the Princess. “Thanks” “I’ll be your shield as long as the rabbit loses” Loolilalu stated. Loolilalu disappeared as Ragatha turned her attention back to Jax. “Well same verse same as the first” said Jax as he started throwing more what he had previously done. Ragatha started walking toward him eviscerating everything Jax threw at her. He finally fired the rocket launcher again and it hit her. “Nice try Jax” said Ragatha from behind him Before he could anything Ragatha elbowed him in the back. She kicked him to his back. “An-an-an-any last words Jax” Ragatha said “What?” said Jax “An-an-an-any las-las-last word, Ja-ja-ja-jax” said Ragatha as she shaking. “For-for-for-forget it. She brought up one of her arms then brought down intending to cleave Jax in half, but before it could connect, she started disappearing. She looked at Jax with a look which could be described as disappointment as she disappeared completely. Jax got up and smiled brighter. “Looks like I won” Caine: “That was an interesting bout, to bad it ended in a draw” Jax eye twiched“What the f-” Caine: Jax knows the rules about being a sore drawer. Welp goodbye blood sports enthusiasts.

If Kingdom Hearts had been under the banner of Warner bros instead of Disney our main traveling party members would be Foghorn Leghorn and Porky pig and Daffy would be in Petes roles because there is no way in hell Daffy would be subservient to Bugs

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Combatants vs The abstracted

Context: The Amazing Digital Battle Circus au

The abstracted combatants: The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Combatants

Caine: Hello, loyal viewers, listeners and or readers to the greatest digital blood sport on the internet,The Amazing Digital Battle Circus. Today events are special as today is the day we let the beast have their fun. Today is abstract day in which our combatants will take on the abstracted

Bubble: So sir, who will be fighting who?

Caine: I’m glad you asked. Our first fight will be The absolute heel himself, the guy who most people love to hate and love to see his suffering, Jax. His opponent will be the poster boy for abstraction, the man who is no more then a feral monster, the man who literally has that dog in and out of him, The Hound.

Bubble: Wowie, Jax is most likely going to suffer.

Caine: That’s what the fans love to see the most in The ADBC. Anyway the next bout will be Jax’s “rival,” the ribbon wrangler herself, Gangle. Her opponent will be her old rival, the slipperiest combatant to ever grace these digital halls, Slinks the worm

Bubble: An oldie but a goodie

Caine: Of course, but the next match is a real david vs goliath situation as the broken veteran king goes up against someone of great stature and strength. That’s right fans the strategic master mind of the ADBC Kinger, will be going up against Big Eye the Big guy.

Bubble: You really think Kinger can win.

Caine: Of course bubble, I mean if he there in the head. Okay next match is Zooble vs Manny Mannequin I guess.

Bubble: Wait I thought today was abstract day, why is Manny here?

Caine: Because there was literally no one else and Manny makes fights interesting. Anyway our second to last fight is a main event and for some its the only fight that matters today. Let it be known that its a grudge between the Ragged Ruffian Ragatha and the Killer Klown comedian Kaufmo.

Bubble: I thought Ragatha and Kaufmo got along why the grudge?

Caine: Well, supposedly when Kaufmo first abstracted, he blind sided her and defeated her. Now Ragatha wants her run back as the kids say. But back to the event and our final fight. For this fight we have our rising star (snicker)... Nope still can’t say that straight face, Pomni. Her opponent will be the brutal queen of the arena and the brawn to Kinger’s brain, Queenie.

Bubble: Once again wow sir. The most pathetic combatant to ever grace the hall The ADBC going up against the most accomplished who is now possibly even more dangerous. If I had hand I would applaud you for your sadistic choice.

Caine: Remember Bubble we here at the ADBC don't pulls punches and nor do we have weight class. I hope for all you digital blood sport enthusiast to witness these brutal fight only here at the Amazing Digital Battle Circus

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: The Combatants

Context: The Amazing Digital Battle Circus au

Caine: Welcome back to the Amazing Digital Battle Circus the greatest digital blood sport in the world. I think it be nice to recap who each of our combatants are. One thing about all our combatant is that their all able to recruit npcs to fight along side them

Pomni- Our up and coming star… Nope could not say that with a straight face. From what I’ve seen of the little jester she excel at running and pulling random objects out of her pockets. 

Notable fight: Ragatha vs Pomni

Npc allies: The alligator bandits of Gummigoo, Max and Chad

W: 0 L: 5 D: 1

Gangle the ribbon wrangler and possible champion- The closest thing the Amazing Digital Battle Circus has to a champion, the ribbon wrangler herself Gangle. When not fighting Gangle is a rather nice gal who doesn’t take kindly to bullies which is why she and Jax get along like a wooden house on fire and Jax is the wooden house. This kindness extent to her fighting style as she tries to end things quickly- unless its Jax then she make him suffer-with constricting or crushing attacks.

W: 50 L: 2 D: 29

Kinger the broken veteran king- One of the oldest combatants of the ADBC and is damaged because of it, Kinger is an absolute master strategist. Kinger is one the few combatants to utilize npc in rather clever ways, that the boys at C&A have to adapt in real time for. But don’t think that Kinger sits back and let npc do the talking because Kinger has a mean flurry of blows in his own right. But its sad to think he’s only dangerous half the time due to how crazy he is due to his “break” in sanity. 

W: 25 L: 10 D: 5

Ragatha the ragged ruffian- One of the more simple fighter, Ragatha is the third most dangerous combatant in the ADBC. Ragatha utilize her speed as well as knives, like a lot of them, some would say she has knives for days. She tops this speed and knives off with her signature Cloth cutter the comically large meat cleaver which she was rewarded with from the adventure Cooking Carnage 

Npc Ally: Not by Ragatha's choice princess Loolilalu

W:30 L: 20 D: 0

Jax The absolute heel- The eternal loser of the ADBC, takes up the role of an absolute heel. Utilizing short range teleportation through doors and the summoning of bugs (mostly centipedes), Jax is still a strong fighter when not fighting those above.

W:19 L:49 D:1

Zooble- What exactly do you want me to say about Zooble, that they can detach body parts to attack because that’s all they can do. Zooble is only here because they are the “dying” relative of someone working at C&A, nepotism I tell you straight nepotism.

W: Who cares L: Many D: IDK

Manny the Manaquin- A fellow of few words Manny is rather dangerous. So dangerous in fact everyone including Gangle and Kinger at his sanest forfeits if they see his name in the brackets.

The abstracted- A curious case of beyond madness, those who have lost themselves to abstraction are no more then feral beast (some more then others) with a similar drive for violence as your truly. The boys at C&A don’t know why abstraction happens. One thing that is for certain though when your put into a ring with one, it’s absolute digital blood bath.

The Hound, the circus beast- One of the abstracted who have completely lost themselves, the hound is an absolute beast. Even before their abstraction they were voracious, ready to attack with teeth and claws flying. Now that they are abstracted, its more of the same, but even more deadly

Kaufmo the killer clown comedian- As the host and commentaor of the ADBC I must stay neutral, but if I can say one thing about Kaumo, is was one the best before his abstraction. Kaufmo attacks with puns bringing them to life with every word. He’d toss fruit at you then literally punch you or he say “your a cut above the rest” then you’d end up in two. I  have to say of the combatants that entered the ADBC I miss Kaufmo the most, because now there is no humor in his fights only words that sound like puns but aren’t.

Queenie the brutal queen- The brutal queen of the arena, who knows no equal and the brawn to Kinger brains. In all the history of the ADBC Queenie has never lost a fight I mean she has tied with Kinger and Gangle a few times but never lost to anyone else. It is a shame that she abstracted, she put true beauty in strength

Slinks the deadly slitherer - Before the one side rivalry between Jax and Gangle, Slinks the worm was our ribbon wrangler greatest adversary, to much greater effect. What they lack in arms they made up for in speed and maneuverability. Now a day due to abstracting they use that speed to bowl you over with reckless abandon  

Big Eye the big guy- The most simple combatant to ever enter the ring, Big Eye was one of the more physically imposing. Of course physicality can only get you so far in the ADBC so Big Eye also had an eye laser. Nothing really changed with his abstraction

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Choco Jax vs Gangle

Context: The Amazing Digital Battle Circus au

Gangle and Ragatha were helping Pomni train her abilities when Jax came in and Punched Gangle breaking her tragedy mask.

“Now that’s a really profane face” Jax stated

Gangle looked down at her broken sad mask, then took a deep breath then looked at Pomni. “Sorry training over, I’m going to be busy strangling Jax for the next hour”

She grabbed Jax by the neck and started strangling him. Suddenly Bubble appeared and ate the both of them, then split in two splitting them up

Caine appeared and popped the Bubble holding Gangle. “As much as I love seeing the agony coming from Jax, I want to know why he did what he did”

Jax coughed. “Today is my day, the day I beat that profane smile off your face I’m issuing you a challenge”

Caine snorted a bit. “Gangle this is your call”

“Challenge accepted” said Gangle with a big smile

“Alright then” said Caine as he, Gangle and Jax disappeared 

---

Caine: Welcome back loyal watcher, listeners or reader to the Amazing Digital Battle Circus. Before I talk about our impromptu fight allow me to say a few encouraging words: To all the fans of the ADBC when your down, remembered you are loved, you are cherished you matter to someone so if your in that dark place please get help. I say this as to not follow in the foot step of our foolish victim. That’s right our fight is an oldie not sure if its a goodie. The ribbon wrangler herself Gangle and her victim I mean opponent The absolute heel himself, you love to hate and you love his suffering Jax.

Gangle walked into the arena trying to piece her mask together not paying attention when a bug slapped it out of her hand. She looked up and saw Jax brown and goopy

“You got to be kidding” Everyone said

“That’s right Gangle, after your loss to The Fudge, I decided to take a play from his book and achieved a new chocolatey form” Jax said laughing. “Whatcha going to do”

“Burn you” Gangle said as a little guy made of fire appeared next to her. "You remember Lights right?"

“Ello, you absolute heel” said the fire creature

"Oh no" said Jax

Caine: For those you who don’t know who that fire creature is, that npc is from our tropical vacation theme adventure called Luau Beatdown. That was such a long time ago that I forgot she did recruit an npc ally. But enough my analysis back to the figh… Gangle just burned Jax to a crisp I repeat she just burned him to a crisp. Let it be known your never to big to fail, this is something Jax has learned many times. GANGLE wins again 

The Amazing Digial Battle Circus: Pomni vs Ragatha

Context: The Amazing Digital Battle Circus au

Caine: “Welcome back loyal viewers, listener or to those can’t do the first two readers, To the Amzaing Digital Battle Circus. After a comical mishap also known as Pomni first day we are back to bring you the digital blood and gore you all crave. But first a moment of silence for Kaufmo as he’s been demoted from full time fighter to caged beast.” Caine stops the music and whacky stuff as he and bubble look solemn. “Alright that’s enough, we are here for the gore not whatever that was”

Bubble: “Whose up first sir?”

Caine: “Glad you asked, Bubble, we have the ragged ruffian herself Ragatha and in the other corner replacing Kaufmo, Pomni”

Bubble: “So what can you tell us about Pomni”

Caine: “Well in the real world Pomni… is dying, and the boys at C&A are keeping her alive and by doing that I mean putting her in The Amazing Digital Battle Circus to fight for her existence, she will never see her family again I repeat never again. As for who she is now, well from what we seen of her. similar to Jax she has hammer space able to pull thing out her pockets.

Bubble: “Will that be enough to defeat Ragatha”

Caine: “We can only hope, so let get down to the battle itself”

…

Pomni walked into to see Ragatha

“Your not mad about me abandoning you to Kaufmo” Pomni stated

“Of course, I don’t bring personal beef into the arena” Ragatha stated as she pulled two butcher knives out. “Now let’s see how a jester fight.” She lunged at Pomni brandishing the butchers knives and tried to slice at her.

Pomni dodged then ran far away from Ragatha. “I know were supposed to fight but I didn’t hear any sort of bell”

“Ain’t no bell Pomni when your situated in the amazing digital battle arena that’s when things start” Ragatha stated

“Oh” Pomni replied.

Ragatha lunged at Pomni only for Pomni to once again to dodge at her. She continued to slice at Pomni only for her to dodge and run away

Caine: Looks like Ragatha is playing with the newbie, reminds me of when Kaufmo was still new and the first thing that happened to him in these halls was getting repeatedly kidney punched by Kinger’s pawn, good times.

Pomni still running and dodging remembered when she first appeared in the circus, and tried to pull something out of the pockets of her outfits. She dodged a thrown knife as she pulled out an explosive and threw in at Ragatha only for her to kick it back and explode in Pomni’s face

“You wouldn’t believe the amount of time Jax has tried that although he’s gotten tricker with his placements” Ragatha stated. “I know you don’t want to fight, so I’ll give you a quick out.” 

Ragatha unsheathed a comically large butcher knife and one again lunged at Pomni.

Caine: Pomni is in for it now as Ragatha has pulled out any dolls best friend Cloth Cutter. For those you who don’t this legendary weapon, Cloth cutter was gotten from the Cooking Carnage adventure in which our combatants had to cook, fight, eat or be eaten, Ragatha was able to win that day and stole CC from the Carnage Cooker. Why she names it Cloth Cutter is beyond me

Out of desperation ran and started pulling stuff out of her pockets to throw at Ragatha, from Pianos to bowling balls which she either cut to ribbon or dodge. Finally Pomni ran out of and tripped on a bowling ball falling on her face. Ragatha wedged cloth cutter in the ground then flipped her on her back.

“What are you doing?” Pomni asked 

“Do I look like Jax, only a coward attacks from the back” Ragatha stated as she grabbed Cloth cutter. “Trust me this won’t hurt a lot”

Pomni quickly kicked the bowling ball she tripped on at Ragatha legs, causing her to fall and Cloth cutter to fly into the air. Ragtha looked at Pomni then got up only to be decapitated by cloth cutter causing her head to fly behind her

Caine pulls out a pog facing bubble: Oh my goodness Pomni landed a devastating and possibly lethal  hit on Ragatha.

Pomni looked behind her and saw Ragtha’s head. She grabbed it and scoop her into her arms. “I’m sorry Ragatha. “I’m sorry Ragatha

“It’s alright Pomni I forgive you” Ragatha head stated. “But you need to know one thing”

“What is it?” Pomni asked as she looked at Ragatha

“Feeling bad and mercy can only get you so far” Ragtha said. 

Before Pomni could react she was sliced in half and Ragatha’s head went fly again only to be caught by her body.

Caine: By god Pomni just fell for the most classic of blunders 

Bubble: Never go against a sicilian when death is on the line

Caine: No, I mean yes, but no. Never show mercy to a downed opponent  you never know what they have down there. This goes double for Ragatha.

“You said you don’t attack people in the back” Pomni said

Ragatha’s body pulled out a sewing needle and reattached her head to it. She rolled her neck. “If we had blood you drew first so that went out the window.” 

She brought down Cloth cutter onto Pomni splitting her in half then her body turned to pixels before disappearing 

Caine: RAGATHA WINS, NO SURPRISE

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus: Jax vs Gangle

Caine: Welcome back to the Amazing Digital Battle Circus, Digital blood sports enthusiasts. Unfortunately due to a certain jester and rabbit who will remain nameless we are experiencing technical difficulties

Bubble: Jax and Pomni killed everyone including the abstracted and the boys at C&A are currently working to make sure everyone respawn safely

Caine pops Bubble: You should of not said that. Anyway the best we can right now is reminisce about simpler times. Like the third time Gangle killed Jax

...

Caine: So allow me to set the stage. I sent the combatants to a basic fantasy setting and Somehow Jax overthrew the ruling npc. Because Jax was still new at the time the other combatants decided to play his heelish games. All except Gangle, for you see Jax insulted her face then broke her tragedy mask. Skipping most of the story in which she fought and took down Ragatha, Kinger and Zooble because those aren't funny we are in this scenarios present at that time

Gangle stood their surrounded by several npc soilders.

"By order of king Jax stop right there string lady" said one the npc

"What is a king to a god" Gangle said valiantly

"We serve king Jax and our god is the mother eve" said the npc

"Nah" Gangle said confidently. "Your god is right here and she's fresh out of mercy"

Caine: The color drained from these npc faces, they were not ready for that declaration. Some of them ran away, some of them dropped to their knees and some of them tried to fight and were promptly executed by Gangle.

"The rest of you can and will live if you give me Jax" Gangle stated

Caine: They turned tail and betrayed Jax. Now Jax tried to fight against this army of mutineers but even the greatest combatant in the ADBC can't handle an army. So there was Jax at Gangle ribbon...feet. What she says next is the reason she is one of the greatest combatants to grace the digital arena.

"On any other day Jax I'd let you have this, but you insulted a young maidens face, destroyed her prize possession then made me slaugher these defenseless npc and my friends" Gangle stated

Caine: Jax tried to say something, but she slapped the smile off him literally

"So to restore the honor of said maiden you will be executed by my hand" Gangle stated

Caine: So Gangle marched Jax to the kingdom, having him humiliated by all the npc, before executing the usual way only she can, strangulation. (Caine laughs) C&A are still getting therapy bills from those who watched that

...

Bubble: Some would say that's not a fight that's just Gangle being Gangle

Caine: I never said it was fight. Gangle fought Kinger and Ragatha and Zooble gave up, but I didn't touch on those

The Amazing Digital Battle Circus ep 2 Aftermath

For more context on this here The Amazing Digital Battle Circus Pilot. For those of you who don't want to read that in short The Amazing Digital Battle Circus is an au idea in which the Amazing Digital Circus is a blood sport watched on by millions. The cast fight die and respawn all the time

Gangle is the most deadly person and takes no shit especially from Jax

Kinger is crazy but battle hardened

Jax has the same personality and gets the crap beaten out of him by everbody for it

Caine is more blood thirsty because he in this AU has acess to all the internet. Whenever he says the boys at C&A he talking about the company behind The Amazing Digital Battle Circus Caine and Able

Ragatha while nice is cold blooded

and Pomni is still a nervous wreck, but is just as deadly as everyone else

Now what this post is about

Caine: Hello, Hello and welcome to the recap of the Amazing Digital Battle Circus, as always I’m Caine, host and commentator of the greatest blood sport on the internet. For those who don’t know this is a way to decompress and tell you about everything even the unseen stuff of our little show here, so lets begin.

Gangle

Caine: The most dangerous woman in the ADBC suffered her first lost in the Candy Canyon Kingdom arc at hands of THE FUDGE, but she got her run back as she filled Jax with explosive and turned him into a chocolate rabbit and you can guess the rest.

Pomni

Caine: The rising star of the ADBC [Laugh track]. Who am I kidding she is not, losing fight after fight, she has a worse record than Zooble. However a bleak light has opened up as Pomni is now able to summon the gummy gator gang. The boys at C&A however had to make some room for these summons so say goodbye to the abstracted long arm mcgee and Jummy, they will not be missed, I mean seriously they only ever talked to Zooble so what is the point of keeping their memories alive.

Ragatha

Caine:Thanks to the beautiful freaks that watch the ADBC, the Ragged Ravenger Ragatha due to popular demand now has the ability to summon Princess Loo. This is the only time were doing this so don’t expect the Amazing Digital Battle Circus to become the Amazing Digital Love on the Battlefield Circus because that is already a registered trade mark somewhere else. I do however think she threw the token for Princess Loo away as most npc are useless against human combatants in a direct fight anyway

Jax

Caine: Jax can now add drowned in chocolate and fed to The Fudge as one of the many ways he has died in the ADBC. However before he died he saw Gangle lose to The Fudge so his Moral should go up and he’ll keep fighting. [Looks off screen] Nevermind he is currently being made into Gangle b**** all is right with the world

Kinger

Caine's announcement

Caine: As you all know I made Kinger the war commander for the Candy Canyon arc, and he did wonderful so Kinger has won the MVP award for most amount of candy guts spilled. He has also gained army of candy men,

Zooble

Caine: Gangle… was there, and that’s all I can say

Mega Mewtwo Z

So for context Part of this idea came from @xxtc-96xx Mewtwo series.

So imagine if you will, Mewtwo gets a new Mega in legend Za even though it doesn't make sense for it to be in that game. I don't know what mega Mewtwo Z would look like, but it has a new ability called mutate (or a named that's nicer) which is just Libero/Protean. Because in my head it makes sense that Mew or Mewtwo would have a Protean like ability

Undertale School au

Okay so hear me because this might have been done before. An undertale au school au where the humans, the sould as well as any child monsters are school staff while any adult monsters are students

The Staff

The Annoying Dog- The superintendent 

 Frisk- the beloved principal

Chara- the vice principal with no patiences for trouble makers

Asriel- the school secretary, the teacher in charge of the gardening club, and on demand substitute.

Monster Kid- Substitute gym teachers 

Ralsei- One of the guidance counselors and home economics teacher

Susie-  Crossing guard

Kris- Former Principal now janitor

Berdly-  Math, Science, and Reading teacher, also the teacher in charge of the anime and gaming club 

Noelle- The Music teacher

Clover- The Truancy officer

Kanako- The Art teacher

Mooch (IDK if Mooch is a child or not)- Security guard

Cody also known as Gab (Green soul)- Part of the lunchroom staff

Batty also known as Percival (Purple soul)- History teacher 

Flo (Name taken from @s0ckh3adstudios) (Blue soul) - is the dance teacher. Is the least enthusiastic member of the staff

From the cast of Duotale Cyan and Orange

Julian (Orange soul)- The Main Gym teacher

Kai Annie (Cyan soul)- The other guidance counselor

Tik and Tek- The other security guards

Students

 Duotale

Lex End- The no nonsense head of the hall monitor. Favorite subject is history

Neverdead- Was bullied, but a talk from Kai was enough to get them to stand up for themselves and rat the bully out. Favorite subject was science. Is not related to Undyne in anyway

Mic- One of the top jocks in the school only behind Undyne. Will go to bat for anyone

Coach or Bufford- Because of his helpful nature gained the nickname coach and given that he is Julian’s assistant coach it makes sense

Anansi- The eight armed book worm, and shares Mr. Berdlys passion for books. Tried to start a book club, but only got one petition from Gerson. Is not related to Muffet in anyway

Oren and Staug- The “trouble” making duo who hang out with Sans to pull pranks.

Yellow

Chujin- The third smartest kid in school and Ceroba’s boyfriend, got kicked out of the anime club twice when he tried to petition Ben 10 be listed as an anime. Got sick and hasn’t returned to school yet

Ceroba- Chujin’s girlfriend and his biggest hype man. Is a cheerleader and was “coerced” by Kanako to join the anime club

Starlo- Apart of the hall monitor with Ed, Morray, and Ace also member of the gardening club. Some say he joined the club due to Dalv but that’s only a rumor

Marlet- The most energetic student next to Papyrus. Favorite subject is art as Kanako allows her to build things with wood. She also a member of the hall monitors, but once was caught by Starlo doing something bad and had to serve detention 

Dalv- A member of the gardening club and a rather skilled pianist.

Base Undertale

Asgore- A big old softie and the founding member of the gardening club. In a fit of rage once punched Chujin for destroying some of flowers

Sans- The smartest kid in school, brilliant but lazy. Put all his energy into pranking and especially pranking Vice principal Chara

Mettaton- The most popular kid in school, the guy everyone (except Chujin) wants to be friends with and beloved by all staff including Chara. Did an absolute solid for Alphys

Alphys- The second smartest kid in school and member of the anime club. Her and Chujin did similar science projects, but hers ended up winning because  Asgore was judging

Undyne- The all star jock of the school and second member of the anime club. Has broken all the schools records, then broke em again. After Lex stepped down as head of the hall monitors Undyne stood up

Papyrus- The energetic brother of Sans. Is banned from economic along with Undyne for unfair reasons. Tried to become a hall monitor, but was rejected for being to nice. Has gotten A+++ in all classes

Toriel- Broke up with Asgore and is dating Sans. Is a student teacher with Ralsei in home ec.

Princess Peach showtime Costar and understudy dlc

In the Nintendo Direct announcer voice

"Even though Peach made Grape take her final bow it appears that remnants of her forces have come back for an encore along with Grapes older and more sour sister Raisin. This time you won’t be taking a bow alone as you’ll be accompanied by other leading ladies in Costar mode.

Help clean up the mean streets with Officer Pauline

Find the hidden treasures with Adventurer Daisy.

Preform act of magics never before seen with Witch Peachette (played by Toadette)

Hm it appears we have another understudy in... Luna Luma, Mario's companion in super mario galaxy 3 reprising her role as Rosa, Rosalina odd doppleganger.

Princess Peach Showtime the Costar update rolls out the red carpet summer 2024

Officer, Witch and Adventuer came from @starryqueen-18

Gardevoir and Mightyena

The coolest aspect of some pokemon is there connection to other pokemon like for example Seviper and Zangoose or Corsola and Mareanie, so here is a hypothetical one.

The gardevoir line are facultative Herbivores which mean their primary diet in the wild are non sentient plant, but can eat meat if needed

Mightyena are Obligated Carnivores which mean they'll only eat meat and have a wide prey selection.

So in Hoenn a poochyena will hunt a Ralts and a pack of them will hunt Kirlia they will not hunt a Gardevoir though

A single Mightyena will not try to hunt a Gardevoir because Gardevoirs are smart, but a pack of them will. Even against a pack Gardevoir can clutch a W, but its rare.

And while a Gardevoir will ignore Poocheyena and Mightyena they are not against hunting them when times get tough

Once again this is a hypothetical, because I thought about how human like pokemon such as Gardevoir fit into the food chain of the pokemon world

Duotale Cyan and Orange: Cast stats

As the title suggest this is the stats for the combine Undertale Cyan and Undertale Orange known as Duotale Cyan and Orange for their Pacifist genocide which I call Cowardice and Impatience and neutral.

Oren

Pacifist: 200/12/9

Geno: 200/27/10

Neutral: 200/11/9

Julien Check: A small bully

Kai Check: The “brains?” of this duo

Staug: 

Pacifist: 400/15/10

Geno: 400/16/10

Neutral: 400/16/11

Julien Check: A big bully

Kai Check: The brawns of this duo

Julien and Kai’s Check: Two “tough” guys ready to make some trouble

Tik

Pacifist: 200/10/2

Geno First fight: 200/10/2

Judgement hall: 100/10/10

Neutral: 200/11/2

Julien Check: Making a roaring noise somehow

Kai Check: A scarily cute monster

Tek

Pacifist: 200/2/10

Geno: 200/2/10

Judgement hall: 100/10/10

Neutral:200/2/11

Julien Check: Making a booo noise

Kai Check: A cutely scary monster

Julien and Kai Check: Two scary guards of the snow

Mic

Pacifist:  1400/20/5

Geno: 1400/20/5

Judgment hall: 700/40/0

Neutral: 1400/40/5

Julien Check: A true punch buddy

Kai Check: A bruiser that reminds you of someone

Coach

Pacifist: 800/40/20

Genocide: 800/40/20

Judgement hall: 400/50/0

Neutral: 800/40/20

Julien Check: The blind master

Kai Check: The master of calm and patience

Julien and Kai Check: A master and student of stop and start

Anasi: 

Pacifist: 1300/8/18

Genocide: 1300/9/19

Neutral: 1300/8/18

Julien Check: A long winded rambler

Or

Kai Check: Want to continue the story

Neverdead: 

Pacifist: 2180/15/2

Genocide:2180/15/2

Neutral: 1090/15/2

Julien Check: A fishy helper

Or

Kai Check: A reluctant helper

Lex end:

Pacifist: 36/70/10

Genocide: 34/10/10

Neutral: If this au had a game attached to it and if were possible something interesting that could happen is that Lex matches the stats of the partner of the first boss fight you decide to kill . So for example You kill only Staug then Oren joins the final fight in the judgement hall and Lex matches his stats

Julien/Kai Check: The end of the line

Paldean gym leader and elite four Legends ZA ancestors

Legends ZA Ancestor potential tier list

Okay, so hear me out this is a sort of tier list on whose ancestor will be legends ZA in no particular order but tittled tiers

Guaranteed

Sycamore

Lysandre

Callum/Serena

Diantha 

Most likely or Kalos gym leader tier

Valerie

Clemont

Korrina

Grant

Ramos

Olympia

Viola/Alexa

Least likely

Fantina

Nemona

Then the Unovan elite four ranked from most to least french

Shantal

Grimsley

Caitlin

Because actual spain is next to france here are the Paldean gym leaders ranked. If one of them had to have an ancestor this is the order I see them in

Kaity

Brassius

Larry

Iono

Ryme

Tulip

Grusha

Kofu

The Kalos buddy trio

Shauna

Trevor 

Tiermo 

Finally a wildcard that might or might not happen a ancestor character similar to Adaman who we will all assume is related to a gen 10 character

Mega Regionals

Okay so hear me out, we all got to acknowledge that after Za and possibly gen 10 their putting mega evos as we know them will be put back into the poke vault. So an idea I have is create a bridge between regional/convergent forms and mega evos. So here are some ideas on how that could work

This is the laziest idea, but the appearance of the megas are how these pokemon looked in Kalos' past

Lore wise Zygarde did something that caused the pokemon to look like their mega, their complete forms as you will

Similar idea to 2, but the professor or the antagonist did something combing a zygarde cell with a mega stone that allows your pokemon to look like it

Now I don't know if these are bridges per say, but I feel like these ideas would be better then just shelving Megas and bringing them back every so often

Professor Battle

So hear me out, you know how Professor Laventon was the most random character to ever be in Legends Arceus. Like almost everyone else is related to someone from the Sinnoh games and then there is this random guy who doesn't look like anyone from those games until you realize he's from Galar and his purple hat most likely remind you of Hop and Leon's hair.

So for Legends ZA we get the ancestor/descendant of Nemona who is the professor of this game. Professor P is their name because I don't know a plant name to give them, and their area of expertise is pokemon strengthening. And you know what's the best way to strengthen pokemon? Battle of course. So this guy/gal is just as crazy about battling as Nemona. Every problem that comes to this guy/gal goes back to battling for example...

Problem: We need to strengthen up the flying and levitating pokemon so we transport construction material faster

Professor P: "I got it battles in the skys" turns to player. "I just so happen to have a hot air balloon or two, so you and the construction workers go up in it to have a battle with flying and levitating pokemon"

or

Professor P: "It appears the foreman is having trouble getting all their eggs in one basket so I purpose a battle that uses three pokemon at once or a triple battle as it were"

Some of you might be asking why would they be related to Nemona. First, Sada/Turo are past and future related so Arven's out, Penny is related to Rose and Peony so I don't want to over saturate her family line and as for Carmine and her brother just no. Second and this is more important I would find it hilarious that Nemona's love for battle is an inherited gene that skipped her parents

Zygarde complete Max

So weird take and this is most likely not going to happen if Legend's ZA is set in Kalos' future then I can see someone not necessarily Lysandre's descendant trying to carry on Team Flare's goal. Like they try to create a replica of Zygarde that can surpass the real Zygarde kind of like what Cell Max from Dragon Ball Super: Super Heros was for Cell

Caine'a Announcement

So context, this is happening in my interpretation of a battle Au for the Amazing Digital Circus which I’ve dubbed The Amazing Digital Battle Circus, in which the cast fight, die and respawn for the viewing pleasure of an audience.

So let me set the stage…

Caine: “Welcome back, digital blood sport enthusiasts, you know me your host and battle commentator, Caine here to make an announcement.” “[Clears throat] Jacks the rabbit is a b*itch ass motherf*ucker he pissed on the moon.” [A laugh track starts] “But in all seriousness we have some truly great things to tell you. First and foremost the boys at Caine and Able have cooked up a beautiful update were going to war with the Candy Canyon Kingdom. And introducing the generalissimo of this event the confounder himself Kinger”

Kinger appears next to Caine: “Nice you made me the leader of that charge. How much prep time do I get”

Caine: “Down to brass tacks usually you would be screaming at me. And to answer your question it will be a while until that update happens, so you have all the time in the world, but please no Blitzkriegs the kids at home want to see something more exciting then Gangle strangling Jax.”

Kinger: [Scream] “I’ll do something pretty interesting”

Caine: “Speaking of Jax and Gangle, the boys at C&A have told me were being sponsored.” He pulls out a scroll and opens it. “Were being sponsored by Waffle House”

Bubble “Darn I was hoping for Raid Shadow Legends”

Caine: “Me two, but maybe one day. Now in collaboration with Waffle House, were introducing the Waffle House challenge in which we set one our combatants as a host and they have to fight an increasing number of fight happy customer, or rally the customers to take on the Waffle Houses finale boss MANAGER GANGLE. Now to make this fair Gangle is not allowed to kill the Host only react to their aggressive acts, but we here at The Amazing Digital Battle Circus are beacon of fairness, and who are we to say what counts as an aggressive act”

Bubble: “I wonder how many times Jax will be drowned in a sink”

Caine: "I do two, and you all at home will also know if you stay tuned to THE AMAZING DIGITAL BATTLE CIRCUS"

Duotale Cyan and Orange: Cowardice and Impatience

First context, UT Cyan and Orange and for names that will be in this post UT Cyan and Orange Cast. Now personal context I saw a post on twitter on why and how the green soul of kindness would commit genocide for a stand alone Undertale green, and this made question why the cyan and orange soul would for my hypothetical Undertale Cyan and Orange. Then it hit me Cyan becoming impatient with the situations and Orange being cowardly. 

So let me set the stage…

We leave the flower room and encounter Oren and Staug where we would Flowey. They try to teach us about the importance of teamwork before turning on us and are stopped by Toriel. The usual genocide shenanigans happens with Julien (Orange) and Kai (Cyan) blasting through the ruins. Now in UT Cyan and Orange pacifist we go to the Toriel’s home where Julien “kidnaps” Kai and takes them to the alternate exit of the ruins. In Genocide we go directly to the alternate route where Oren and Staug are waiting for us. 

They begin to apologize about being jerks and it had a negative influence on Kai and Julien so they took it out on the other monsters. We go into the battle menu and the textbox reads: Oren and Staug are asking for forgiveness. If you kill Oren then he turns to dust leaving a yarn ball while if you kill Staug then he turns to dust leaving his axe. For this post let’s say we kill Oren: We leave the battle menu and Staug picks up the yarn ball and looks at us and says “I’ll be happy when I see your body float down the river” before escaping out the door to Snowdin. Julien tries to go back probably to kill toriel, but is stopped by Kai, either out of sense of mercy or an impatient desire to move forward either the two leave out the ruin door.

We enter Snowdin forest and are immediately jump scared by a standee which is punched down by Julien and Kai laugh at them . This genocide has a somewhat branching path structure and  since we killed Oren then Tek leaves the bushes and says “At least someone appreciated our hard work that big guy who came out the ruins didn’t really care it and Tik had to go after him.” Awkward silence and then Tek leaves. Genocide shenanigans in the Snowdin forest ensue until we reach the branching maze paths Tik and Tek set up. In pacifist you chooses which way to and then you meet Tik/Tek and they congratulate you on making it to the end. In genocide you make it to the end and kill one of them. When we make it to the end of Snowdin the other twin greets Julien and Kai and asks where their other half went is as they just got order to evacuate Snowdin. We enter the battle menu and we attack them, but much like Sans they dodge, but don’t attack until the forth time we attack where we do land a hit on them and they go on the offensive. Now something of note is Tik and Tek have masks not anything special like Ceroba’s mask just stupid little halloween masks which they are attached to, so if we picked up the dusted twins mask then act to drop the mask in front of the other twin they will understand things faster and go on the offensive after that. Now back to the fight ending they get knocked down and we have the option to spare or kill. Obvi here we choose kill and as we press attack, bone spikes jut up in front of the twin not being able to totally protect breaking their mask in the process. The surviving twin let’s say Tik escapes and we exit the battle menu. Before we can proceed to waterfall a wall of bone spikes jut up from the ground. Lex End shows up and says you are not permitted any more carnage then leaves. Julien by order of Kai starts punching the wall of bone spikes repeatedly. Cut to Staug, Tik and Lex all hearing that commotion and wondering what to do. Lex suggest sending down a different path at least to divert from waterfall and hotland and that’s what they do. Cut back to Julien whose punched down all the bone spikes and we proceed to find Staug and taunts us like how Oren would before running down a different route. With no control or choice Julien and Kai chase after Staug ending up in Hudsee (an area similar to the Wild east, but Julien and Kai coded) 

So Genocide shenanigans ensue until we meet, this areas bosses. Now if Julien LV is higher than Kai then we encounter Mic and if Kai’s is higher then Coach and obvi this the actual fight as we take them down in one hit. The other one shows up and sees what we did and the actual fight which is Undyne the Undying level difficulty as they fight like dirty boxer even interrupting our turns sometimes. Before we can kill them, like usual they are able to escape, this time by Anansi. In pacifist we would be thrown down a hole where we would meet Anansi, but we skip it and go to hotland where we are greeted not by Neverdead, but Anansi and Lex End who are being screamed by a walkie talkie. They see us and toss the walkie talkie at us then make their escape.

So Genocide in Hotland ensues, until we meet Lex End with a bag at the end of it. He is for intensive purposes are penultimate boss. His goal isn’t to kill both of the humans, but weaken them so throughout the fight they whenever us or him gets low on hp he heals using items from shops we missed or taken from the dimensional box. The fight is over if either we damage him more than he can heal or he runs out of healing item. Either way they beg for mercy and we have a choice to either spare or kill. If we spare him then he kills Kai, causing Julien LV to rise and kill him and if we kill him then he counters with green attack killing Julien causing Kai’s Lv rise as he turns to dust. The soul of the dead one is taken by Anansi and we proceed to the Last Corridor where all the boss we didn’t kill are waiting for us. If we spared Lex then Anansi sits this fight out assuming the remaining human has some goodness in them. Either way this fight is technically a no win and even we manage to kill them all (the 3 bosses that escaped plus Anansi and Neverdead), Asgore kills the remaining human because their determination can only get them so far.

Vox's announcement

Has this been done yet, if it has I'm sorry

I’ve come to make an announcement: Alastor the Radio Demon a b*tch-ass motherf*cker, he pissed on my f*cking boyfriend. That’s right, he took his deery- f*ckin dick out and he pissed on my f*cking boyfriend, and he said his dick was “THIS BIG” and I said ‘that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my V.com: Alastor the Radio Demon you’ve got a small dick. It’s the size of this walnut except way smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like.

[Explosion sound] That’s right, baby. All points, no fur, no pillows- look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong. He f*cked my boyfriend,  so guess what, I’m going to f*ck the Pride Ring. That’s right, this is what you get: MY SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not going to piss on the Pride ring, I’m going higher; I'M PISSING ON HEAVEN! How do you like that Charlie?! I PISSED ON HEAVEN, YOU IDIOT!

You have twenty-three hours before the piss DROPLETS hit the f*cking Pride ring, now get outtta my f*cking sight, before  I piss on you too!

I had a second one involving Alastor, but that needs more time to set up