My Favorite Headcanon / Trope In Fics Will FOREVER Be Every Single Witcher Being Like "And This Is Our

My favorite headcanon / trope in fics will FOREVER be every single witcher being like "And this is our Jaskier, You can look but we don't trust you to touch him yet, he's our special Jaskier, we only have one of him, and we LIKE him, so be NICE and don't even THINK of harming him or we will all EAT YOU"

Prompt 71

The other witchers at Kaer Morhen have always grown tired of Geralt's random moodswings and bouts of gloom and grumpiness during the winter. He'd be happy and carefree, safe in his home, and then some dark thought would crest in his mind, and for a few days straight, he'd be in a horrible mood. When one year he brings his bard with him, they realize the moodswings have disappeared completely. That is, until Jaskier starts trying to "bond" with them all and spends less time with Geralt. Then all of a sudden the snarls and snaps from Geralt are back. One day, Lambert gets tired of Geralt's sass, and shoves Jaskier at him, and they're all amazed when Geralt loses his bad mood and instead chooses to carry his bard off to cuddle in front of the fireplace. Nuzzling him and purring the whole time. Thus commences a new rule of Kaer Morhen. If you spot Geralt being pissy, you chuck the bard at him. Jaskier has been taken away from a meal, a game of gwent, his chores, his bed while asleep, and one especially embarrassing time he was taken from a bath. Jaskier is quite alright with the new rule, as it always ends in deligthtful Geralt cuddles, but sometimes he wishes Geralt would just find Jaskier instead of moping when he misses him.

Prompt 119

The problem with having a human bard follow you around is that bad food can make them sick. Geralt could and would happily eat undercooked or overcooked food. Food was food. Stale food was food. Food. Was. Food. But his bard is more delicate than him. He could get sick, or could even possibly die if he so much as eats something wrong. Thus Geralt begins paying a kind older woman in a town to teach him how to cook. She assures him that with enough practice and recipes from her, he'll be a perfect spouse for his Jaskier. Geralt goes to correct her and say they're just friends, but when she mentions telling him a special recipe because of it, Geralt decides there's no harm in going along with the lie. Jaskier meanwhile is surprised, when he gets to the town where Geralt and him have agreed upon meeting each other that spring, only to run into a woman who very loudly exclaims "Oh! Geralt's husband!" Geralt's what?

Jaskier has scary dog privilege walking around towns now, his witchers wouldn't dare let anything happen to their bard

Prompt 71

The other witchers at Kaer Morhen have always grown tired of Geralt's random moodswings and bouts of gloom and grumpiness during the winter. He'd be happy and carefree, safe in his home, and then some dark thought would crest in his mind, and for a few days straight, he'd be in a horrible mood. When one year he brings his bard with him, they realize the moodswings have disappeared completely. That is, until Jaskier starts trying to "bond" with them all and spends less time with Geralt. Then all of a sudden the snarls and snaps from Geralt are back. One day, Lambert gets tired of Geralt's sass, and shoves Jaskier at him, and they're all amazed when Geralt loses his bad mood and instead chooses to carry his bard off to cuddle in front of the fireplace. Nuzzling him and purring the whole time. Thus commences a new rule of Kaer Morhen. If you spot Geralt being pissy, you chuck the bard at him. Jaskier has been taken away from a meal, a game of gwent, his chores, his bed while asleep, and one especially embarrassing time he was taken from a bath. Jaskier is quite alright with the new rule, as it always ends in deligthtful Geralt cuddles, but sometimes he wishes Geralt would just find Jaskier instead of moping when he misses him.

I'll never get over how the show massacred that boy, why does he LOOK like THAT

jaskier was led on for over twenty years by a guy with zero social skills who shouldn't even know what that means. so I don't blame him for losing his goddamn mind and picking the worst look possible for his breakup world tour

Prompt 117

Jaskier's head often hurts. He doesn't always tell Geralt, but Geralt catches him putting a hand to his forehead and wincing in pain. Jaskier will sometimes lose days of songwriting inspiration, or time for hobbies, because when he and Geralt aren't moving down the path, Jaskier will lay in his bedroll writhing in pain and groaning at how unfair life is. Geralt at first thought Jaskier was exaggerating his pain, as Jaskier tended to be dramatic. When Geralt hinted at this though, Jaskier looked at him with such a hurt expression that Geralt panicked his way into somehow saving the conversation. The very next winter, Geralt asks Lambert, who is much better with potions and the like, to help him make some sort of pain remedy. They test and experiment all winter, before they finally make on they're both happy enough with to send off that spring. Geralt and Jaskier have been reunited for two weeks when Jaskier reaches a hand up and rubs one side of his face, with particular amounts of pressure and care given to his eye and brow. Geralt fishes around in his bags before holding it out to Jaskier. "...What is this?" "The only potion I have safe for humans. Ask me for it, never dig it out yourself, it looks similar to some of the others." "What does it do, Geralt?" "It should help. With... With the pain." Jaskier shoots out sad scents. That wasn't what Geralt expected from his gift. "I'm sorry, Geralt! I didn't mean to slow us down so much! I can work through it! i can keep walking!" Geralt explains he doesn't want Jaskier to "work through it", he wants Jaskier to not be in pain and to be happy. Jaskier, growing up as a busy young viscount, apparently was told to push through and continue with his schoolwork and duties, no matter how bad the migraine. Geralt assures his bard that all Geralt wants is Jaskier's happiness, and Jaskier drinks the potion. Merely twenty minutes later and Jaskier was bouncing around and singing again. He liked seeing his bard not be in pain.

Obsessed with how in the polish version Geralt cares for his bard PAGHIAWHIPWGIAWPHGPA

The Witcher – 3.01 Shaerrawedd / Wiedźmin – 1.07 Dolina Kwiatów