Geralt Was Nervous To Bring Jaskier To His Home. He Was Sure The Bard Would Get Along With Eskeltheir

Geralt was nervous to bring Jaskier to his home. He was sure the bard would get along with Eskel—their shared love of poetry and talking about emotions should smooth the way. Lambert would just be thrilled to have a new way to tease Geralt, and Jaskier being a bit of an asshole himself would help them bond.

But what of Vesemir? His mentor was not one to tolerate fools. What if he didn’t see past Jaskier’s foppish ways to his golden soul? What if he wasn’t understanding about the bard’s human limits? What if he scared Jaskier away for good?

All of these thoughts passed through Geralt’s mind outside the gates of Kaer Morhen. The gates opened for them, Geralt’s mentor was waiting for them on the other side, and as he came into view—

“PAPAMIR?!?”

Geralt winced at Jaskier’s loud shriek from beside him, and then the horror dawned because what did Jaskier just call Vesemir?!?

However, Vesemir didn’t look angry. He looked just as flabbergasted. “Julian?”

It turns out that Vesemir had once fallen for a widower Count, and he continued visiting the family even after the Count died 100 years ago. That Count was Jaskier’s great grandfather.

Geralt watched, dazed, as Vesemir doted on Jaskier while gently scolding him for not visiting his mother more often.

This is so funny, I love this WPGHWAPGHPAWGHPAW

Prompt 128

In place of August Sixteenth, Promptapalooza 9/ Most people immediately assume Geralt would be annoyed by human ailments. Find them distracting, or burdensome. They assume that if Jaskier gets sick, the Witcher wakes him up at dawn and forces them to travel onward any ways. They spread rumors that Jaskier sews his own wounds when caught in a hunt. The people speak of the heartless witcher yelling at the bard for getting sick. Of course, it's all false. Couldn't be more false, actually. Jaskier woke up with a sniffle. Just a tiny sniffle. No big deal! And yet, Geralt noticed. Of course he noticed. Notices everything with those damn supersenses of his. "Geralt, the contract-" "Fuck the contract." "That archespore hasn't even taken me on a date yet." "Jaskier, lay down!" "I can sit up-" "LAY DOWN!" Jaskier has been stuck in a witcher-enforced bedrest for two days. Even if the sniffles became sneezes, and his throat began to get scratchy and sore. So what if he had a fever? So what if he felt like shit? He shouldn't be slowing Geralt down! But Geralt won't let him do anything but slow him down! "Not gonna tackle me to the bed?" "No, walking is good for you, in spurts." "How nice." "No, keep moving. Ten more minutes of walking." "In the room?" "You can lap the inn if you'd like." "Well, alri-" "No wait- It rained recently- Too cold and damp for you." "Says who?" "Says me. And your fever." "Geralt, it's been two days of nothing but laying!" "I thought you liked being in bed." "Yes! To fuck! To sleep! Not to lay and stare at you!" "I like staring at you." "FineI'llpacethefuckingroom-"

Prompt 123

In place of August Eleventh, Promptapalooza 4/ If you ask Jaskier, dimensional spells were a bitch. That sorcerer was a twat! Blasting him and Geralt with his stupid cursed amulet boosting his stupid powers stupid man making his witcher all frustrated and sad! "Damn it!" Geralt snarls as they appear in a... Very small room. It's pitch black. "Don't fret, Geralt, there'll be a way out, I'm sure-" "Just- Shut up for a moment, Jaskier." "Right! Shutting up right away! Just as soon as I-" "Jaskier!" Jaskier huffs, and begins blindly feeling for some way out of the room. He feels a stick and gasps with excitement. "Oh, Geralt!" He swings the object around blindly until he hears the unmistakable sound of the bristles of a broom smacking directly into the side of Geralt's head. "Jaskier." "Sorry! Didn't mean to! Though you must admit, it's kind of humorous in it's own way-" *growling* "Alright maybe it isn't! Gods." Suddenly brightness blinds them as someone yanks the door open. "Can you damn kids stop trying to fuck in my supply closet!?" A man in weird clothing yells at them. Jaskier stammers a bit trying to think of like, any response, before Geralt just drags him out by the arm. They're in a bright building, with white walls that don't... appear to be stone or wood? And there's SO many people around. And they're all dressed... similarly to them. "Dude! Nice contacts!" A man in black with white hair says to Geralt. "I love your Jaskier outfit, did you make it yourself?" "Um no, I bought it." Jaskier says, to a man who looks remarkably like himself. "..Um, where are we?" Jaskier asks the man, and the man stares for a moment before letting out a soft chuckle. "Ohh! Yeah, it's easy to get lost. You're by the signing booths. What are you looking for? Merch? Photo-ops? Cosplay contest?" "A contest?" Jaskier asks, with excitement. "Yeah! Over who did the best cosplay of The Witcher! Are you going to enter as a Dandelion/Jaskier?" "Yes, I am!~" Geralt is desperately trying to find a way back to his own dimension, waiting for Yennefer to open a portal to find them, but it gets confusing when there's at least forty women AND MEN here dressed exactly like her. Jaskier meanwhile is busy throwing a tantrum over getting second in some contest, but Geralt is more worried for their lives, thank you very much. "SECOND PLACE! In a contest over who looks like me, I got SECOND place, Geralt!"

“What are you putting in your soup?”

“Hemlock.”

“Ha! And they say Witchers don’t have a sense of humor.”

But Geralt isn’t joking. Because Witchers are immune to most human poisons, they tend to use them as spices.

Geralt has always been conscious of the fact that this is a thing that marks him as inhuman. He doesn’t bring out the human-deadly spices in towns.

At first, Geralt didn’t add poison to his food in front of Jaskier. But then, the bard proved himself unphased by black eyes, growls, and all sorts of strangeness. Surely, he wouldn’t think differently of Geralt for eating a bit differently.

Only, Jaskier keeps shrugging the poison off as a joke. And he keeps trying to steal food off Geralt’s plate like an idiot!

(Nevermind the fact that Geralt let him do it before and thus gave Jaskier the impression that the behavior was acceptable)

Geralt never lets Jaskier sneak food any more... Jaskier's starting to worry they're regressing in their relationship. Less amounts of intimacy shown. Geralt would just like the bard to stop trying to eat his poison!

Geralt meets a man named Jaskier who claims he can see ghosts. He isn’t sure if this “ability” is real or a delusion on Jaskier’s part.

Somehow, this uncertainty doesn’t prevent Geralt from falling in love with the man.

YESSSSSS I love this!!!

Prompt 124

In place of August Twelfth, Promptapalooza 5/ When Geralt is a young boy going through the trials, he's afraid of friends. So many boys... Don't make it through. It's easier to not get attached. But it got lonely. Too lonely. So one day, he picked up a dandelion that grew in between the stones in the courtyard, and he made a wish. And that's when he noticed he wasn't alone. There was a boy there. A new boy. He hasn't seen this one before. He must be from the wish! ... Geralt can't focus his eyes enough to figure out what the boy looks like. What is his hair like? Maybe it's curly? Or it poofs out like the dandelion did? The boy giggles and Geralt cocks his head to the side. No.. No it'd be something... Fun. Mischievous, but well-meaning... Messy and tousled. Perhaps a bit wavy. Fluffy and soft. What color would it be? He glances back to the dandelion and thinks of white hair, before he cringes, his own white hair invading his joy. He looked freakish. The dandelion boy didn't deserve that. He'll stay away from dandelion colors. Maybe brown. A nice chestnut color. Geralt blinks and the boy's hair changes before his eyes, becoming what he thought. The boy giggles again and Geralt admires the way it sounds. The boy focuses a tiny bit. His eyes. What about his eyes? He shouldn't be cursed with a witcher's eyes. Something prettier. Like a flower. Blue. The boy unblurs further, staring at him with big blue eyes. Lastly, he needs a name. "Dandelion." His vision of the boy finally cleared, and sat beside him was what must be his new friend. "I'm Geralt." "I'm Dandelion!" "I know that, I named you." "Do you want to play?" And Geralt nods, smiling. Years have passed, and Dandelion is easily Geralt's best friend. Some others have made fun of him here and there for believing in his imaginary friend, but Geralt doesn't care. Dandelion means a lot to him. Geralt's favorite thing to do with Dandelion is have Dandelion sing to him. He likes the sound, and Dandelion is truly very good at it. It all started when Dandelion sang him a lullaby one night when he was scared. Geralt then couldn't stop asking for more and more songs. Dandelion disappears one day. (Maybe during the collapse of the schools? For fun angst?) Geralt mourns and grieves him for years. He ponders for hours what could've made him leave. Was he scared off? Did Geralt do something? Was he ever really real? Years and years and years later, Geralt hears singing. Beautiful, familiar singing. He charges into the tavern and scares the patrons, but he doesn't even care, because standing on stage, playing a lute, is Dandelion. "If you'll excuse me, ladies and gentlemen! A friend of mine has come for me." And he skips off the stage, and right over to Geralt. "Where did you go?" "...I... Had to find a way to be real. Seen by others. Besides you." "Was I not enough?" "No! I mean yes! You were! But- Well, If we were to go on adventures like we always promised, I'd rather people not hold out on paying you because they thought you were crazy for speaking to me!" He laughs, and Geralt can't help it, he chuckles as well. "I- I go by Jaskier now." "Jaskier." "I sing." "...So you do." "I was waiting for you to find me. I knew this town would be on your route! Wasn't I so strategic, Geralt?" "Very strategic, Dand- Jaskier." "Have you come to take me on our adventures, Geralt?" "...Yes, Jaskier. I have."