Papa Vesemir - Tumblr Posts

POV: you fucked up

Working out together

Here is something I think Witcher folks should think about more:

Centaur Geralt

Do you guys realize,,, how fucking happy that man would be. Like oh fuck my dad is dead and my mother abandoned me but hey! Half horse! Oh no Witcher mutations aaaaaaaaaaah… still half horse. It’d be his saving grace. Also, he’d still keep Roach while on the path. Not because he needs her as a steed, but as companionship, since horses are herd animals. Vesemir not knowing if he should get a young Geralt a horse since,, he is a centaur. But then seeing how much more relaxed Geralt is while standing next to the actual horses and he just, “Geralt do you want an emotional support horse?”

The glamor hiding his true appearance but not his strength. Going to kick open a door because his hands are full and winding up kicking it off it’s hinges and across the room. When he’s partially distracted he still does it. The first time he does it in front of Jaskier he’s like aw fuck.

Jaskier: WHAT THE FUCK?

Geralt: horse strength

Jaskier: ??? Did A past Roach possess you??

Geralt realizing Jaskier doesn’t know he’s a centaur: uhhhhhhhhhh i have a secret for you!

Instead of leaning his bedrolls under trees he just places his up against Geralt and demands he unveils himself. Unluckily for Jaskier this means his hand sometimes gets crushed under Geralt’s front leg. Geralt always grumbling in the morning because the ground gets his legs and stomach all dirty and if any of you have ever had to bathe a gray or white horse, or really just one with a very light coat, you will understand the pain, of trying to make them clean. It’s so fucking tedious.

I can imagine the dismay of whenever Kaer Morhen would get muddy from rain and Vesemir watches in despair as little Geralt slips in the mud from chasing Lambert RIGHT after Ves helped him get perfect and shiny. Geralt tracking mud into the main hall, his hindquarters are caked in mud. Vesemir wants to rip his hair out for letting Geralt grow his feathers out. His tail is a mess and Ves gives up.

When Jaskier finally goes to Kaer Morhen Vesemir gives him a hug and just says “you know my pain.”

Jaskier instantly understands.

The worst part is that, if you own or have been near horses, they are essentially overgrown dogs that can also accidentally kill you. Alike dogs, they roll. A lot. Whether it’s to self sooth or if it’s purely out of enjoyment.

If you know kids, you know that they imitate their parents or other important figures.

Basically what I’m saying is that Geralt unknowingly teaches Ciri his ways and, being a centaur, finds no problem with it. Yennefer is furious on the other hand.

Posting a a little today but really like the whole bit the boys have over calling Vesemir old. They all just collectively agree “old man old man”

It’s even funnier when notw makes vesemir only 70, or really 60 something years older than them since they’re around 4-8 age group. And he only looks like he’s in his 20s-early thirties. I’m sure Lambert started it. One day he just asks “why are you so old?” And Vesemir is left shocked. He’s not that old!!! But then when they get back to Kaer Morhen and the boys are a bit older Geralt finally gets to ask all his questions about Kaer Morhen he couldn’t ask before.

“How old is Kaer Morhen?”

“I don’t know Geralt. Old.”

“Are you older than Kaer Morhen or as old?”

Vesemir throws his boots at him. Then that’s when the whole “*insert item* is almost as old as Vesemir!”

HE HATES IT.

When Ciri finally joins them, Lambert immediately teaches her the bit. She is RUTHLESS with her insults. Vesemir is giving her a history lesson in the courtyard since it’s nice out. The boys are fixing one of the walls in the background. He’s telling her about a war that happened around 600 years ago.

“Do you remember what it was like in that time? Since you were there?” Vesemir wants to crawl into a hole and die in it. The boys are basically toppled over in laughter. Lambert starts choking from laughing too hard. Ciri seems extremely pleased with herself.

It starts evolving further into “oh you wanna know about the conjunction of spheres? Oh I dunno, ask Vesemir he was there since before the conjunction.” And “what was it like when dinosaurs were alive, Vesemir?”

AND IT SOMEHOW SPREADS. He’s in a growing town in southern Redania with Geralt and they run into Jaskier. Now he’s never had the fortune of meeting him, but he’s heard plenty. He’s about to thank the poet for looking after Geralt until Jaskier goes “so I’ve heard you’re quite old! Tell me Master Vesemir, what was it like when kingdoms started to form? How did the royal families come to be in power?”

Vesemir is SEETHING. Geralt just smiles like the little shit he is.

Little Ciri: I'm a mistake from god

Vesemir: *CHOKES* W h a t

Ciri: and I'm from the h world

Vesemir: W H A T. Where is your dad

Training Eskel and Geralt was a fun time for all of the instructors at Kaer Morhen!

I was scrolling through Pinterest for some poses and came across some funny images that reminded me of the wolves!

Little Geralt: *points to one of Vesemir's scars* how'd you get that?

Vesemir: oh... I was shaving my arm with a knife while I was shitfaced and I gored it open down to the bone.

Little Geralt: oh.. why would you shave with a knife WHILE drunk?

Vesemir: ...well you see when you're drunk-

Sometimes I just like to think about what it could've been if Geralt had gotten Ciri right after Pavetta and Duny died. If Calanthe was so weighed down by grief she realizes she can't take care of Ciri. So she orders Moussack to go find Geralt to collect Ciri. Imagining Geralt in a random tavern somewhere in Temeria, slowly making his way up to Kaer Morhen for the winter as autumn is approaching. Him having a gut feeling he should head up early, he thinks it's because something is wrong with Vesemir so he's anxious to make it through. But Roach needs to rest and well, it wouldn't hurt to get some extra supplies for the winter. Certainly wouldn't hurt to get some extra booze so he has relief from Lambert's grating voice on his ears. Besides, he and Eskel can stay up late and drink to their hearts content up in his room like they used to sneak around when they were teens.

Then out of the blue he sees Moussack, and dread fills his entire body. He doesn't keep up with news outside of what Dandelion tells him. So when Moussack is telling him Calanthe is summoning him he's thinking "oh fuck, she's changed her mind and is going to execute me."

But Moussack reassures him he's not going to be harmed. Calanthe is asking for him because of his child surprise. And now Geralt is really worried. What happened to them? Are they okay? Are they hurt? Did they die? They're only a few months old, there's so much that could've gone wrong. So he agrees to go with Moussack.

Calanthe looks a mess when Geralt sees her. Eist is by her side as always, trying to comfort her. Pavetta and Duny are nowhere in sight and it's making Geralt extremely antsy. Calanthe tells him the news, her voice is hoarse from all the crying she's been doing. Geralt sympathizes with them, gives them his condolences. And then that's when he realizes "oh. OH. OH NO". Sure enough Calanthe tells him she can't take care of herself, how could she care for a baby. Geralt refutes telling her "they're your grandchild, I don't want to rip them away-" and Calanthe tells him then it's a girl. And for a split second his brain gives the helpful thought of "oh I have a daughter" and Geralt is having an internal meltdown right there in the throne room. But he can't refuse. His entire basis for not coming back and claiming her is because she has a family who cares about her. But now that family is saying that they can't care for her, not because they don't love her, but because they do. So Geralt agrees to take her.

The first time he meets her he is entirely captivated by how small and precious she is. The moment he holds her he feels overwhelmed with such a fierce protectiveness and he can't help but absolutely adore her. He is trying so hard to stay stoic and unemotional but the moment he's alone with Ciri back in that old tavern he'd been at he just holds her and smiles. If he'd been a normal man, he probably would've burst into tears by how happy he was. (he did later once she got settled into Kaer Morhen, when he and Eskel did end up drinking up in his room. They're talking about the usual things, and then he looked over to her in her makeshift crib and just started bawling. Eskel freaks out and asks him what's wrong and he replies "I just love her so much."... Yes Eskel teared up.)

Then he has to go through the lovely moments of "how the fuck do you raise a baby" which Vesemir watches with so much amusement. Geralt raided most of Kaer Morhen's library and Nenneke's office for books about parenting. (Kaer Morhen has none, unsurprisingly.) He eventually asks Eskel to go to Oxenfurt and grab Dandelion and any books about parenting, childhood development, psychology and women's health he can find. (He is DREADING eventually having The Talk with Ciri but he won't be unprepared.) Dandelion is completely awestruck with Kaer Morhen of course however, nothing shocks him more than seeing Geralt looking bone tired with a 5 month old baby wailing in his arms, trying to soothe her.

"uh... What ya got there, Geralt?"

"H e l p."

Where's Yennefer? What about Yennefer?? Geralt is hesitant at first to even tell Yennefer he has a kid. But she sends him a letter one day, asking him where he is now that it's coming up on spring. (Ciri's first bday!!! Yay!!!! Also oh gods planning a birthday?!?!?!?? That's a thing??????) So he does tell her, and she understandably to her character demands to see this child surprise. So again, sends Eskel on out (pls Geralt, he's your childhood best friend, not your errand boy.) to go get Yennefer. Yennefer storms through the main hall, not even acknowledging Lambert and Vesemir, and right up to Geralt. How did she manage to find her way through the halls without ever being there before? Geralt doesn't know and he's scared by it. Yennefer spots Ciri, who's doing her tummy time. To which she's very fussy about and gives the nastiest glares an almost 1 year old can to her father. Yennefer is absolutely gobsmacked that Geralt was being genuine. She points to Ciri, then to Geralt, then back to Ciri, to Geralt.

"YOU?????? HOW????"

"I'm really bad at making jokes."

Yennefer adores Ciri, but Ciri is a little skeptical of her. Who is this strange woman????? Where is her dad?????? Where's her other dad (Dandelion)???? How dare she smell nice and be warm???? Ugh as if she'd let her feed her!!! No way! Yennefer is always completely drenched with baby food whenever she attempts to feed Ciri. Geralt tries so hard not to laugh at her. Ciri is absolutely seething by the end of it and is only contained when Geralt picks her up and holds her securely. Then it's like little devil Ciri never existed, she's all smiles and babbling happily to her dad. Yennefer gets really disheartened over it. Late at night she ends up crying over it, thinking it wouldn't matter if she was able to have kids or not; Ciri proves she'd be a horrible mother anyway. Geralt doesn't know what to say at first, but he knows it's not true. Yennefer is trying her best, it's just that Ciri is really fussy. She even fusses sometimes when Dandelion holds her. He tries to comfort Yen, and ends up deciding the best thing to do is hold her and tell her that she's doing amazing. He doesn't think she believes him because she's still got a very somber look on her face the next day. She becomes reluctant to take up care of Ciri because of the incident. Well about after the third day of this Ciri gets fussy again. Geralt is taking a well deserved nap day. He's back in his room snoozing away. Yennefer and Dandelion are with Ciri in the library, one of the warmest places in the keep. Dandelion wipes his hands of the ink that stains them and picks her up and checks if she's soiled. She isn't, so he asks if she's hungry. She thrashes around in his hold and turns in search of Yennefer and starts grabbing towards her. So Dandelion hands her over to Yen. The moment Ciri's resting against Yennefer she settles down.

"huh, guess she just wanted her mommy." Dandelion comments and Yennefer starts crying. (Dandelion's face morphed from aww to OH FUCK)

The bigger Ciri gets the more rambunctious and energetic. Geralt couldn't be prouder that they're all raising her to be genuine to herself and that they've broken the generational trauma. Vesemir pats Geralt on the shoulder one day and tells him "I'm proud of you, Wolf" and damn, if that doesn't make him want to cry. He doesn't of course, only meeting Ciri made him cry from joy. And oh how she gives Lambert a run for his money. It's hilarious to see a 60-something year old argue with a 4 year old. They get into the most stupid arguments too. "blue is better than red!" Or "I'm taller than you" which is the most absurd because it's always Ciri who starts it. Geralt thinks it's because Lambert is the shortest besides Vesemir. But Vesemir has only become short due to his old age, and Ciri already gives him a hard time for that. ("Why are you so fat and old? Aren't you a Witcher like Daddy?" She said once and Vesemir just paused and looked at her like "why would you say that to me". She burst into a giggle fit at his crushed expression.)

The argument will always, without fail, go:

C: I'm taller than you.

L: no you're not? I'm 5'11!

C: well I'm 8 feet tall!!!!

L: more like 2 feet tall!

C: NO! SEE

Then she'll stand on the chair so she towers over Lambert.

L: fine well I'm older.

C: no??? My birthday is first

L: NO ITS NOT?

C: YEAH IT IS

L: NO APRIL IS BEFORE MAY. AND IM 67, YOU'RE 4

C: uhhhhh I hate to break it to you, but no you're not. You've been lied to your whole life.

L: W H AT WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE????

C: uhmmmmm god.

Then when Coën finally meets one of the Wolves and comes up to Kaer Morhen he's shocked to see someone so young. At the time Ciri was around 7. She calls him ugly and walks away to the stables. Coën is just left flabbergasted while Lambert and Eskel are laughing their asses off. Geralt apologizes to him, while trying to hold in his laughter. Coën becomes like an older brother to Ciri, and he gets on her good side by helping her prank Lambert.

When Ciri hits 12 she does get her period, and Geralt is like "OH GOD OH FUCK HOW DO I TALK TO HER ABOUT THIS I DONT WANT TO MAKE IT-" and Yennefer walks into the room and goes "I told her, we're good."

Then comes the "boy talk" Where Ciri brought up that a character in a romance book was attractive and Geralt went into "No one is good enough for my baby girl" dad mode and brashly announced "you're not allowed to date boys until you're 21."

Yennefer slaps him on the arm and Ciri looks at him almost offended.

"jokes on you I don't even know if I LIKE boys. Maybe I just like this character's personality." She replies sassily. Geralt cannot argue with that logic. (And yes 2 months later, she goes on a day trip with Yen and talks to a girl her age. She comes back and Geralt asks her how it went and she says "I definitely like girls." And walks up to her room to take a nap. Geralt celebrates as soon as she leaves "YES!!! I DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT SOME BRUTE MESSING WITH MY DAUGHTER FUCK YEAH" Yennefer reminds him that some women are just as bad and he crumples to the floor in agony. Now he has to worry about brutish women hurting his daughter.)

Essentially, I just love that Geralt has a daughter, and that he's so proud of her and loves her so much. Their relationship is just so 🥹❤️ I adore them.

Do y'all think the witchers would have huskies? I wanna say they'd be more likely to have Malamutes or even Norwegian Elkhounds or a mixture of all three. But I cannot get the image of Lambert riling up the huskies into a howling frenzy. Little shit 16 year old Lambert directly after Kaer Morhen falls and Vesemir is like "yeah sure let's get dogs to make sure the boys don't become emotionally detached from themselves too much", carousing the little pack of 2 huskies and a malamute into screaming their heads off in the middle of the woods. Geralt is laying with his head in Eskel's lap glaring at Lambert because 1) yes it's funny but 2) he's trying to sleep for once dammit. Eskel is thinking "man we should get Great Pyrenees like my family used to have" (he does for the safety of the goats and chickens they eventually get). Vesemir is regretting all of his choices as his headache gets worse. But if it makes Lambert happy the three of them are willing to suffer.

Open to interpretation

all i'm thinking about is that one post I made about Vesemir owning 1 tiny dog named Duchess that terrorizes either Lambert or Geralt (I can't remember which so both atp) Alternatively thinking about Ciri bringing home a dog and Geralt being the "I don't want that damn animal" Dad Trope and then becoming besties with it.

Prompt 71

The other witchers at Kaer Morhen have always grown tired of Geralt's random moodswings and bouts of gloom and grumpiness during the winter. He'd be happy and carefree, safe in his home, and then some dark thought would crest in his mind, and for a few days straight, he'd be in a horrible mood. When one year he brings his bard with him, they realize the moodswings have disappeared completely. That is, until Jaskier starts trying to "bond" with them all and spends less time with Geralt. Then all of a sudden the snarls and snaps from Geralt are back. One day, Lambert gets tired of Geralt's sass, and shoves Jaskier at him, and they're all amazed when Geralt loses his bad mood and instead chooses to carry his bard off to cuddle in front of the fireplace. Nuzzling him and purring the whole time. Thus commences a new rule of Kaer Morhen. If you spot Geralt being pissy, you chuck the bard at him. Jaskier has been taken away from a meal, a game of gwent, his chores, his bed while asleep, and one especially embarrassing time he was taken from a bath. Jaskier is quite alright with the new rule, as it always ends in deligthtful Geralt cuddles, but sometimes he wishes Geralt would just find Jaskier instead of moping when he misses him.

Geralt was nervous to bring Jaskier to his home. He was sure the bard would get along with Eskel—their shared love of poetry and talking about emotions should smooth the way. Lambert would just be thrilled to have a new way to tease Geralt, and Jaskier being a bit of an asshole himself would help them bond.

But what of Vesemir? His mentor was not one to tolerate fools. What if he didn’t see past Jaskier’s foppish ways to his golden soul? What if he wasn’t understanding about the bard’s human limits? What if he scared Jaskier away for good?

All of these thoughts passed through Geralt’s mind outside the gates of Kaer Morhen. The gates opened for them, Geralt’s mentor was waiting for them on the other side, and as he came into view—

“PAPAMIR?!?”

Geralt winced at Jaskier’s loud shriek from beside him, and then the horror dawned because what did Jaskier just call Vesemir?!?

However, Vesemir didn’t look angry. He looked just as flabbergasted. “Julian?”

It turns out that Vesemir had once fallen for a widower Count, and he continued visiting the family even after the Count died 100 years ago. That Count was Jaskier’s great grandfather.

Geralt watched, dazed, as Vesemir doted on Jaskier while gently scolding him for not visiting his mother more often.

This is so funny, I love this WPGHWAPGHPAWGHPAW

Papa Vesemir & Baby Eskel

- Eskel is only a few months old when Vesemir brings him home to Kaer Morhen.

- Vesemir was panicking internally the entire ride to the keep because he has no idea what to do with a pup so tiny.

- He’s determined to figure it out though because he loves his new son more than life immediately.

- Baby Eskel sleeps in a crib next to Vesemir’s bed at night

- He keeps his dad awake, as Vesemir can’t stand to let him cry. He goes to his son every time he makes even the slightest whimper for anything.

- Tired Dad Vesemir feeding his pup a third bottle at four in the morning

- Tired Dad Vesemir hauling Eskel around in a makeshift baby carrier while he gives fencing lessons

- His students love the baby. All they want to do is coo at him and Vesemir has to force himself to stay in teacher mode and tell them all to get back to their drills.

- Papa Vesemir feeding little Eskel mashed up veggies and fruits and sighing when his pup makes a mess of himself in the process.

- Vesemir’s younger brothers trying to trick Eskel into trying a lemon slice and Vesemir whacking them over the heads with a broom for pulling such a cruel prank on his pup

- Papa Vesemir teaching baby Eskel to walk and talk

- Eskel saying his first words and taking his first steps

- Vesemir spoiling his son with all sorts of stuffed animals and toys to play with

- Cranky uncle Rennes finally admitting that the pup is adorable when he sees Vesemir passed out in his armchair with tiny Eskel snuggled against his chest.

- Papa Vesemir always snuggling his precious little pup

A question for Papa Vesemir, how do you get your pups to calm down after a year on the Path? They must be stressed when they come back. (Also I love you)

Vesemir: *Chuckles* I’m flattered. And, yes, you’re right. The pups don’t usually come home in good spirits. It’s a hard life, out there on the path. Food’s always scarce and your pay’s not always given in full when you’ve finished off a contract. That makes it difficult to buy supplies for potions, which in turn can lead to improperly patched wounds. Their clothes and armor are torn and hanging off them all by the time Winter rolls around, and the things the three of them see on their travels are things that a human’s imagination couldn’t stand to conjure on its own. Everything takes a toll, but I try my best to make their time here in the Winter as restful as possible.

Feeding them all’s the most important thing. Gotta make sure the pantries are stocked full before the pups arrive. That’s where a majority of my own coin goes. I don’t take many jobs anymore but when I do head out for a hunt, I make sure the payment’s worth it. King Bran of Skellige handed over enough gold to last us all three Winters once, after I cleared a pod of sirens off his shores. Most of it went to food. My boys come home starved from the path, their ribs sticking out sometimes...I don’t like it one bit. That’s why I make sure and feed them all plenty once they’re home. The first few nights at the keep, we have more to eat than usual. That helps to at least settle their aching bellies.

I tend to all of their wounds as well, once they come back home. Like I said before, they run out of coin and it gets hard to buy supplies for potions. Luckily, here at Kaer Morhen I’ve got the lab, a greenhouse, and everything in my study. Plenty of medicine and bandages and sterile tools for stitching. I can’t tell you how many times one of them’s come back with a fever, holdin onto an opened wound that’s been oozing out infection for who knows how long. Healing them is usually a simple task but getting them to hold still while I fix whatever’s ailing them, now that’s a different story. Especially if it’s Lambert. I don’t normally condone his drinking habit but a little bit of booze helps to settle him enough for me to patch him up.

Scratches and bites aren’t the only hurts they all bring back, however. The wounds in the mind are the hardest ones to treat. I do what I can, but nothing of that sort can really be cured entirely. There’s brews to help at least, and I keep enough made for each one of my pups. Different potions work for different witchers, of course. I can’t give Geralt the same brew I give to Lambert for nightmares. It wouldn’t work if I did, and If I gave Geralt’s to Eskel, it would only make his worse. 

The only other thing I can give my boys is my love. I talk to them whenever they need that and listen when they just need me to hear them. Sometimes one or two or all of them will slip into my room at night after a nightmare. They’ll either make themselves a spot on the floor to stay the rest of the night or make themselves comfortable on the open side of my bed. Eskel’s told me it just makes him feel like he’s safer. I assume that’s the case with Geralt and Lambert as well, and that’s fine by me. They’re always welcome to stay with me if they need to...Lullabies help to settle them back down at times like that, after they’ve had a dream bad enough to send them running to me. Lambert likes to have his back rubbed too. That’s always helps him back to sleep.

A lot of folk would have you believe that Witchers don’t give hugs but that’s a lie. I hug my sons every day. They’re my sons. I want them to know that I love them.