Little Story Of This For People Who Dont Have Time To Make Out Who Did What :)

Little Story of this for people who don’t have time to make out who did what :)

Dick and Tim were hanging out, when Dick got bored and dared Tim to steal something from Vicki Vales house, and Tim, being a short ass lil shit, was unable to refuse a challenge, and agreed. So stole a very expensive watch from the house.

Everyone found out about this, because obviously, and since Vicki is quite a ‘important’ and ‘influential’ figure, Commissioner Jim Gordon took lead of the investigation. (Begrudgingly)

Anyway, being in jail was the LAST thing that Tim wanted, so then came the game of pointing fingers;

Cass knew what was going on, and for reasons Unkown, somehow bribed Commissioner Gordon into adding Jason into the suspect list. Though Gordon disagreed, he agreed to put Jason into the suspect list.

By the end of it, Commissioner Gordon had four (three) suspects. Jason, Bruce, Tim and by request of his daughter, Barbara, Dick. For reasons Unkown.

Bruce is annoyed, irritated, and wants to go back in time to erase all the children he had (no he doesn’t) and is completely on Barbara’s side, thinking it is Dick who committed the crime, and even (JOKINGLY) said he would leave his children to become Batgirl. His children have not let him live it down since.

Thus, the trial began!

Tim has bribed and blackmailed Damian into being his lawyer. The only reason Damian is here, is to get Jason in jail. For stealing his BatBurger toy.

Jason has get Duke as his lawyer, who has been secretly bribed into being on Tim’s side by Damian himself. Jason, the poor dude, has no idea of this.

Bruce claims he doesn’t need a lawyer, but Clark showed up anyway. Selina is also there to laugh at his misery :)

By the end of it, Damian and Tim, the power duo, have won. (Somehow, it was clear that Damian didn’t even try.)

Jason is getting ready to go to jail for a dreadful weak, and Duke is ever so mournful (he’s cackling in the corner, Jason has promised hell on him)

Bruce somehow did not go to jail (thanks to his billionaire-playboy persona) and is upset for Jason, but is being comforted by Selina. (It’s just a week, he’ll be fine Bruce~ he’s suffered worse. Just let your kids have a little laugh :))

Barbara has been taken to Kent Farm to hang with Kara (Dick asked Clark a favour, Barbara almost landed him jail even though he wasn’t even a proper suspect)

Jason is now in jail, much to the glee of his god awful, annoying, cruel, stupid, disgusting, demons, sent from hell, siblings. He is in the same cell as Kate, who is glaring at him menacingly, and Jason doesn’t really care enough to ask why she’s there. (She got into a fight with a gang. Ten people are in the hospital currently)

Jason, attempted to call his last hope, his saviour, Alfred, to bail him out, but ‘unfortunately’ the butlers signal kept getting cut off. (Alfred was still upset with Jason for ‘accidentally’ shooting Cass while on field. It wasn’t a serious injury at all, but for plot convenience, Alfred is letting Jason stay in the fairly comfortable cell for atleast a day or two)

Stephanie, after having lost a bet with Damian, Tim and Cass, is trying to get Jason out of jail so they can together rain hell on them. She is currently failing, but she’s getting there!

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What do you guys think? :)

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1- The top voted person went to jail for a crime they did not commit.

2- Second most voted person actually committed the crime.

3- Third most voted person dared person 2 to commit said crime.

4- Fourth most voted person was person 1’s lawyer, who was actually on person 2’s side all along.

5- Fifth most voted person is 🤌🏻 close to saying ‘FUCK YOU!’ and going to live with Barbara. And become batgirl. For some reason. (They were the second suspect of said crime, though they had nothing to do with the crime)

6- Sixth most voted person is the only one on Person 1’s side and is trying to get them out of jail

7- Seventh most voted person is Person 2’s lawyer who ?somehow? won, though it was clear they weren’t even trying.

8- Eighth most voted person is secretly the one who bribed Commissioner Gordon to put Person 1 in jail for a week, because Commissioner Gordon was too smart and knew it wasn’t actually person 1 (whether he knew it was person two or not, depends on the answer)

9- Ninth most voted person is also for some reason in jail, for reasons Unkown. They are glaring at all the criminals menacingly, and person 1 is too annoyed to ask why they’re there.

10- Tenth most voted person was called by person 1 to bail them out, but was ‘cut off’ because of ‘bad signal, sorry’

11- Eleventh most voted person tried framing person three for the crime, and is now in Kent Farm for some reason???

I just came up with the most hilarious and amazing head cannon for when Damian and Tim patrol together.

(This is after they start not-despising each other btw)

If you have siblings, I’m sure we all know the feeling of when we just barely touch our sibling, and suddenly they start crying because ‘THEY HIT ME!!’

I want you to imagine that, except the injuries are actually serious, for Tim and Damian.

Here are a few skits :D :-

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Dick:-

Dick:-

Dick:- So you pushed Tim off the roof because, you told him to ‘Shut up and die’ and he responded with ‘get a life’?

Damian:- IT WASNT EVEN MY FAULT I JUST LIGHTLY SHOVED HIM AND HE SOMEHOW FELL, ITS HIS FAULT-

Tim:- YOU KICKED ME AND THEN PUSHED ME OFF THE ROOF TELLING ME ‘FALL YOU MOUTH BREATHER’!

Damian:- OH MY GOD HES OVERREACTING-

Tim:- I HAVE A BROKEN LEG WDYM I’M OVER REACTING?

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Tim:- …

Barbara:-

Barbara:- I want you to run this over with me, one more time. How the hell did you stab Damian?

Tim:- I DIDNT STAB HIM OK?

Barbara:-

Tim:- Look, we were in a middle of a fight with Black Masks goons-

Barbara:- OH! So the opposing team stabbed him?

Tim:-

Tim:- Well, not really-

Barbara:-

Tim:- ….So during the fight, me and Damian were having a discussion about Harry Potter-

Barbara:- Excuse me??? Harry Potter???

Tim:- JUST LISTEN OKAY- So I said I shipped Drarry, and then Damian said “Your disgusting and should go to hell”

Barbara:-

Tim:-

Barbara:- First of all, DRARRY TIM!?

Tim:- DONT TELL ME YOU DON’T-

Barbara:- SECOND IF ALL, THAT IS NOT A VALID REASON TO STAB SOMEONE?

Tim:- I JUST HALF HEARTEDLY THREW THE KNIFE AT HIM ITS NOT MY FAULT IT ACTUALLY HIT HIM???

Barbara:- HOLY GOTHAM I SWEAR TO GOD-

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Damian:-

Tim:-

Bruce:-

Tim:- Bruce it’s not as bad as it looks-

Bruce:- Damian is shot and you are bleeding from a stab wound, and your cameras show me that you were the ones who did this to each other, please do explain?!

Damian:-

Damian:- It was Drakes fault-

Tim:- NO IT WAS NOT-

Damian:- He said that I was dumb-

Bruce:- So you STABBED HIM?

Tim:- HAH! YEAH DAMIAN-

Damian:- I JUST POKED HIM ITS NOT MH FAULT HE HAS SUCH WEAK SKIN-

Bruce:- I- We’ll deal with that later, Tim why in the world did you SHOOT HIM?

Tim:- LOOK, THE GUN WAS VERY CLOSE TO ME AND IMPULSE TOOK CONTROL-

Damian:- Father it wasn’t even MY FAULT, DRAKE WAS THE ONE WHO STARTED IT-

Tim:- AND THEN I SUDDENLY SAW-

Damian:- AND DRAKE SAID-

Bruce:- *Noise of regret*

Who is the most stubborn Batboy?

If your answer is anything short of ‘all of them’ your biased and you know it.

Dick trained a killer to be Nite-Wing, to prove a point.

Jason became the mafia boss of Crime Alley, to prove a point.

Tim teamed up with Ra’s Al-Ghul, to prove a point.

Duke made a whole Robin-Gang, to prove a point.

Damian beat up The Joker with a crowbar, to prove a point.

And that’s not even all of there stubborn antics! There’s no ‘most stubborn’ or ‘most out of pocket’. They’re all batshit crazy. You can’t just choose one.

Dick would mostly just manipulate the seats to make sure Bruce is furthest from him and have his favourite people of the day next to him. Doesn’t care about where everyone else sits.

Jason would just ask for disaster. Strategically placed for everyone to FIGHT so he can either leave or enjoy the show.

Cass would force people who dislike each other to sit next to each other and tell them to ‘Get over it, stop fighting’

Tim would leave it for last second and would accidentally end up seating Damian with Jason, which ends in disaster.

Stephanie would just try and get everyone to sit in the lounge to eat dinner instead, so that they can watch legally blonde. She almost succeeded once, so now Alfred won’t let her set the table anymore.

Duke end up putting up pranks or something because ‘Omg I got bored! Sue me!’, resulting in a full on brawl of ‘honour’.

Damian would send Jason and Tim to the ‘kiddie table’ or make his pets sit on all the chairs just to piss everyone off. He would only let Stephanie, Duke and Dick sit down, everyone else can STAND.

Harper would use those ‘spin the wheel’ apps to decide who sits where. It doesn’t end up well.

Cullen would literally ask everyone where they want to sit, without telling them where everyone else is sitting, and by the end of it it’s a fight because ‘I PUT DIBS ON THAT SEAT THOMAS, BACK OFF’ and ‘I DIDNT KNOW BRUCE WAS SITTING NEXT TO ME WTH???’

So obv the only logical choice is Barbara.

(Idk, i accidentally clicked Damian, my whole body is biased :( )

The inheriting games (What do the batfamily inherit)

Duke:-

-*Now, who gets Wayne Enterprises? Well the most common (and boring) answer is Tim, which? I understand, it even said in a comic book that his name is on the paper, but if Tim wants to run a company, he can take Drake enterprises!

-*And Duke is so smart! He was solving Riddlers riddles in 7th GRADE! And, he just feels like the type of guy to be able to run a business nicely! He’d be able to separate enough funds for the Justice League easily!

-*At first, the idea of running a company (With Luscious Fox obviously) is daunting, but after a few months, Duke realises how much he loves it. The routine, the ability to help people even without the mask on? It was exhilarating.

Jason:-

-*Jason inherits the Mansion.

-*I hear you! Why in the world would JASON inherit the mansion? Well, Jason was raised in the streets. He knows best what it’s like not to have a proper place to sleep. I feel like, Jason would make the mansion a place for wandering heroes/people to stop by.

-*Like all his friends would come over sometimes, or any hero who needs a break/place to rest. Or it’s just a place for family to hang out. If the family instead hangs out at the Penthouse, then it can also be a place where people who don’t have a place to stay/who need some energy can stay. It’s still there home though. It holds too many memories.

Cassandra:-

-*Obviously shes Batman. Must I even explain?

-*She inherits the BatCave and everything, and it means the world to her that Bruce trusted her with so much.

-*Cass is the one who could have become the evilest, and most dangerous villain of them all, but instead chose to be a hero. One with the most firm no kill rule. The one, who in Bruce’s eyes, could become an even better Batman than himself.

Tim:-

-*So, Tim doesn’t inherit the Business. Dang. Y’know what he does inherit? Bruce’s CAR collection.

-*If you want to tell me Brucie Wayne, one of the richest and dramatic people alive, who built the most iconic car ever, DOESNT have the most EXTRAORDINARY AND EXPENSIVE Car collection known to mankind, argue with the WALL.

-*I don’t know how to explain it, it fits Tim so WELL. He’d love the car collection, he’d pull up to his siblings and friends house everyday in a new car, and it annoys his friends and family SO MUCH. Classic Nepo-Baby behaviour tbh.

-*I feel like Bruce giving him the car collection, instead of anything serious is a sign. Tim was slowly BECOMING more like Batman (whereas Damian was the one who came defaultly as Batman, and his arc was to find his own person), and since at times Bruce didn’t let Tim have fun, it’s a sign from him now to let his teenage, rebellious side kick in. Have some fun.

Dick:-

-*Dick, our favourite Diva, what does he inherit? He inherits all of Bruce’s Jewellery/accessories!

-*Dick, Bruce’s first ward, the one with the most similar past, who became the hope the people needed instead of the fear.

-*Also, Dicks extra and fashion loving self would LOVE the accessories. More ways to somehow make the most fashionable stuff look terrible on anyone else but me!

-*The jewellery and accessories would be a very layered way of Bruce telling Dick to sometimes take some nights off. It’s okay to be human, and do normal things, like taking too much time choosing which watch matches his outfit, or what belt to match with his shoes.

Damian:-

-*ooh~ What does Damian inherit? Damian, the one who used to, in a faraway past, boast about the fact that he was the blood-son to hide his insecurities of never fitting in, or disappointing his father in some way? He’d inherit the albums, and the family heirlooms. Special objects that held not much value financially, but so much sentimental value.

-*The albums with photos of when Bruce was a baby, to pictures when Damian finally outgrew Duke and Tim. The pearl necklace that Martha wore, and the watch that Jason fixed.

-*Damian wouldn’t need money, I feel like he’d either get a very well paying job, or steal money from the league of assassins (‘It’s not stealing Drake, it’s MY inheritance anyways, so stop sticking your nose in other families business-‘)

-*He’d treasure the stuff so much 😭 He’d keep looking at photos of Bruce when he dies :)))

!!!EXTRA!!!

Stephanie:-

-*Yes, Stephanie gets something. Because while Bruce might not be her father, she’s still part of the family. Somehow.

-*She gets all the….BATMOBILES

-*Yup, you heard me. Cass is Batman, Tim has the cars, but somehow it’s STEPHANIE who ends up with the BatMobile.

-*So, mostly the reason was because of how funny it would be, but it’s also how much Stephanie would LOVE it. And of coarse it’s a layered message here as well.

-*Bruce seemed to have trusted Stephanie the least. He was the worst to her as Robin, and she ended up dead, and after THAT, they’re relationship was far from ‘good’

-*Now, because of the strained relationship, Bruce would NEVER let Steph ride the Batmobile, right? He doesn’t trust her, and, I mean, he doesn’t let DAMIAN ride it with consent- But him giving her the Batmobile is basically him saying ‘I was wrong to not trust you’, and it’s a sort of apology if you will.

-*(Tims ecstatic when he finds out he gets all the cars, but when he finds out Steph got the BATMOBILE?

‘SHE GETS THE BATMOBILE?’ ‘IM ON THE WILL?!’)

Barbara:-

-*Barbara gets all the contingency plans for the Justice league. Cass didn’t. This was Bruce’s way of telling babs how much he trusts her, and how mature she really is now.

-*He didn’t give Cass the contingency plans, not because he doesn’t trust her, but because…He thinks Babs would appreciate it more.

I know what ur thinking; Cass is Batman, Steph has the Batmobile, and Barbara gets the contingency plans? How does that work? Well, it’s basically Bruce encouraging Cass to let people help her, something he struggled with, and one of his biggest flaws.

Selina:-

-*if for some reason (They’re idiots I SWEAR TO GOD), they still weren’t married after he died, she gets the most beautiful diamond, pearl ring known to MANKIND, and a very heartfelt note.

-*If they were engaged/Married, Selina gets all the safe houses that Bruce owns around the world. He would want Selina to travel, and move on.

Commissioner Gordon:-

-*Commisioner gets to know Batmans identity (what it was before), and even if he already knew it, it’s the thought that counts.

-*He also gets a gun…wrapped in a sheet, with a note stuck on it. It had nothing to do with how Joker died, found in an alleyway, shot in the gut. At least, that’s what Barbara claims.

Bruce’s Money in his Bank account:-

-*His kids don’t need the money so.

-*20% goes to Clark (he begrudgingly accepts it, remembering the time Bruce gave him cash on his bday. Bruce always had strange ways of showing love.)

-*Another 20% goes to Dick, another 20% to the Justice League, and the remaining 40% to charity.