What A Thing To Admit That When Someone Looks At Me With Real Love I Dont Like It Very Much, Kinda Makes

‘what a thing to admit that when someone looks at me with real love i don’t like it very much, kinda makes me feel like i’m being crushed’

- lyrics from ‘girls against god’ by florence + the machine

it’s both freeing and devastating to hear your own thoughts & feelings that you’ve kept shut away, coming from the mouth of another. florence has me feeling this way too often at this point lol

“There are times when

my longing for you overwhelms me …

so often I can think of you

only with teeth clenched.”

"This is an apology for the things I have to say

about us to get over us.

I feel most like myself when I am washing blood off my hands in the shower;

and I hope whatever is eating you alive

does it as slowly as possible.

I know it doesn't sound like it,

but this is a love poem.

this is a love poem

this is a love poem,

until it isn't anymore."

"Your absence has gone through me

like thread through a needle.

everything I do is stitched with its color."

“you and I have begun to blur”

“isn’t that how you found me?”

･*。˚✧⁺．

Franz Kafka, from “Letters to Felice”

Trista Mateer “This is an apology”

W.S. Merwin, from “Separation, The Moving Target” (Macmillan Pub Co, 1963)

Hannibal, “Dolce” (season 3, episode 6, 2015)

yet another update: that fic was heart wrenchingly angsty, i feel betrayed.

so one of my friends from art school apparently mentioned me to one of her friends and they have now messaged me a hannibal meme out of the blue saying they were told i am a fan,, anyways here’s said meme:

I’m- WHAHhAHAEAAHJAAH IM HONOURED BUT SCARED THAT IM JUST KNOWN AS THE WEIRD ART NERD WHO LOVES HANNIBAL :,)

“i think i have reached my peak” i say as i dress as if i’m about to die in a 70s horror flick

and i ain’t ever going to stop loving you ! ❤️‍🔥

i love you book carts i love you bookshelves i love you hold pickups i love you tote bag i love you well-worn paperbacks i love you public library i love you used bookstore!!!!!!!

i'm here to be evil. to be very mischevious. so i'm going to point out that will canonically struggles with sleep, yet he sleeps peacefully in hannibal's company despite knowing hannibal's true identity.

will sleepwalks. he has terrible nightmares. and yet... he feels so comfortable and safe around hannibal that he sleeps beside him. sleep is the most vulnerable a person can be.

what's more interesting is that will leaves his wife in bed alone in the middle of the night to read hannibal's letter... we never see him sleeping beside her

is true love being able to sleep peacefully beside a monster? without fear?