Sorry, I Thought You Had To Censor Stuff On Here. My Mistake, I've Been Corrupted By Tiktok, Where A

Sorry, I thought you had to censor stuff on here. My mistake, I've been corrupted by tiktok, where a butter knife will get you banned.

Warcraft Men and How Much I'd Trust Them With My Drink

Khadgar: 10/10. He would put a ward on it. He would be so good with holding people's drinks. He has a lot of experience from holding Medivh's drinks.

Anduin Lothar: 6/10. He won't p0ison me, but he might drink it, or if he's already drunk he'll drop it.

Llane Wrynn: 9/10. He's a very nice man and he won't p0ison me, but he's not very good at seeing when people aren't actually good people (Looking at you, Sargeras in Medivh)

Medivh: 7.5/10. I trust MEDIVH with my drink. I do not trust Sargeras with my drink. Also I feel the need to mention that Medivh is amazing and I love him.

Belo'vir Salonar: 8/10. He's a very nice man but he has a small tendency to a$$a$$inate people.

Rommath: 8/10. Same reasons as Belo'vir.

Gul'dan: -10/10. I will hand him a glass of champaign. I will get the bl00d of Mannoroth.

Illidan: 5/10. I leave for two minutes and he's drunk flirting with a completely uninterested Khadgar.

Anduin Wrynn: 3/10. He'll get k1dnapp3d while I'm gone.

Mathias Shaw: 0/10. He's gonna see the chance to 0ff me and take it. I love him tho.

Flynn Fairwind: 2/10. He'll drop it because he's wast3d.

Genn Greymane: 0/10. I get a bad vibe from him. I don't know why.

Wrathion: 7/10. I love the boy, but he's an idiot who makes terrible decisions. Still better than Sabellian for Aspect, though.

Nielas Aran: 10/10. One of the few people who actually cared about Medivh, and that's all I need to say.

Moroes: 10/10. See Nielas' answer.

Edwin Vancleef: 8/10. I don't work for the Kingdom of Stormwind so we're all good.

Durotan: 9/10. I just get chill vibes from him.

Thrall: 5.5/10. He's probably h1gh as ba||s.

Halduron Brightwing: 5/10. Manwh0r3.

Lor'themar Theron: 3/10. I don't like him. He should listen to Rommath more.

Baine Bl00dhoof: 7/10. He seems nice but is not particularly effective.

Orgrim Doomhammer: 1/10. No.

Velen: 10/10. Will see if someone is going to p0ison me and stop them.

Turalyon: 0/10. I get suuuuper sketchy vibes from him. I think he's in a cu|t.

Malygos: 7/10 pre-insanity, 4/10 mid-insanity, 0/10 post-insanity. I play a mage. He seems sweet before he goes crazy, and when he's crazy he's a giant spider.

Kalecgos: 9/10. Will find a powerful mage and sleep with them immediately, somehow managing to keep my drink in his hand the entire time. I like him.

Nozdormu: Yes/10. He will put it in a pocket dimension.

Murozond: See Nozdormu.

Magni Bronzebeard: 10/10. I f*cking love this guy.

Brann Bronzebeard: 8/10. Easily distracted by shiny objects.

This got way too long, so I'm gonna have to stop here.

Me, completely rewriting The Prank from Harry Potter because of a random idea I had

What if Newt Scamander ended up teaching CoMC at Hogwarts when the Marauders were there?

Just, one Halloween, Newt is being an antisocial little shit in his briefcase instead of talking to people, and Mcgonagall just falls through the ceiling and with no preamble, "BLACK TOLD SNAPE WHERE LUPIN IS, WE GOTTA GO"

And Newt is like, 'Well damn, could'a given some warning." and just grabs a random nearby magical creature very gently, leaves the briefcase, turns into a thunderbird (I headcanon him as an animagus) and just fs of in the direction of the shrieking shack.

Also Remus ends up being friends with Regulus, Evan, Barty, Lily, and even Lucius (To a point) for the rest of the year because if your significant other tries to turn you into a murderer, on accident or not, you won't forgive them that easily.

I love it when people draw Medivh not being entirely white. Like, I understand that it isn't canon, but you can let an ẹ̶̽l̴͚͉̑ͅď̸̨͘r̶̤̬̞̔i̸͓͕̐c̵̨̻̩̿h̷̥̃͘ͅ ̵̢̌́ã̶̦̘͠b̵̧͎̀͝ó̶͖m̴̬̀̓ḯ̸̯̝͈͘n̶̥̮͔͐͌a̸̲̳͔͆t̸̙̐i̴̞͒̒̔o̷̖͛̂̌n̷̨̥̺͆̆̚ dream, ok?

// Commission for @ladymischievous​ //

// Headshot tokens of their versions of Medivh, Khadgar and Moroes for their upcoming Pathfinder game! //

I know it absolutely will not happen, but I would love it if Vyranoth (The ice Incarnate in World of Warcraft: Dragonflight) somehow finds out Malygos is dead (I headcanon that they used to be clutchmates) and just goes "HOW?!?! He was the one of you idiots I could tolerate!"

And Wrathion, being the nerd that he is, feels the need to do an in depth explanation of the events that led to Malygos' fall, and at the end, Vy is just like "SO YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT THIS WAS ENTIRELY OUR FAULT?" and Wrathion is like "Yeah, pretty much. And Alex." and Vyranoth looks around at the nearby Aspects. Wrathion looks depressed. Kalecgos looks out of his depth. Nozdormu just looks tired. And the giant city (Stormwind) looks worse for wear. Even the nearby mortals don't look great, with Right and Left being incredibly on edge because their boss is a fucking idiot and Khadgar just wanting to go back to his magic wizard tower. And then there's the Blues. Who don't exist. There are so few of them.

So Vyranoth decides 'Well I guess I'm a dragon now' and goes over to the portal to Oribos, goes in, flies up to Pelagos (Who is also not doin' great, I'm 100% sure he's a blue dragon and a whole hell of a lot of dragons have been dying) and goes "I want to be a dragon and the titans are busy" and Pelagos goes 'Aight bet' and draconification ensues.

Idfk man I just want at least one of the Incarnates to get a redemption arc.

Neltharion: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me? Malygos: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it. Neltharion: Three of us saw it, Malygos. How do you explain that? Malygos: *points at Ysera* Sleep deprivation. *points at Nozdormu* Paranoia. *points at Alexstrasza* Delusional.

Alexstrasza: Where's Malygos, Ysera, and Nozdormu? Neltharion: They're playing hide and seek. Alexstrasza: Where? Neltharion: I don't think you get how this game works.