Chaotic Love Interests Who Are Just As Likely To Kiss As They Are To Verbally Rip The Other To Shreds

Chaotic love interests who are just as likely to kiss as they are to verbally rip the other to shreds is my kind of thing

Also if you want to read headcanons for a Much Ado AU with the HMC crew: https://muchadorks.tumblr.com/post/622847792341303296/i-need-a-howls-moving-castle-much-ado-about

Book Howl and Sophie have strong Beatrice and Benedick energy.

Now you’ve got me curious! I don’t know if I matched the characters to the accents correctly, so please forgive me. I googled some accent videos just for the ones in your tags (might not all be accurate because there can be multiple accents in one state/province), and I deduced that the Haus soundscape is CHAOTIC

Jack (Montreal) - if he is a native French speaker over English (sorry I could only find a woman)

Jack (Montreal) - if he is a native English speaker over French (though this voice is WAAAAY deeper than I imagine for him)

Bitty (Georgia) - Jefferson is apparently pretty close to Madison, so I assume it’s similar?

Not sure which character actually? (Boston)

Dex (Maine) - complete with lobsters!

Holster/Nursey (New York)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwny52Ncatk

Some of these still could be wrong, and to be fair, a lot of regional accents are dying out/faded especially when it comes to younger generations. But, in conclusion, the accents that may be bouncing off each other in the Haus are C H A O T I C

Check Please Should Be An Animated Series

Honestly, with the fact that there are so many animated series now that a) have an older audience following and b) have an LGBT audience following, this is kind of the perfect series to adapt!

Just imagine:

Ransom and Holster have an actual theme song for “Hockey Shit with Random and Holster”! I can picture exactly how it sounds in my head, and Jack’s still the only one who can hear it

Not enough material for a full season? ANIMATE BITTY’S TWEETS/THE EXTRAS!!! 

Wait, ANIMATE ASK A WELLIE! Make it another segment like “Hockey Shit”!

Also we could totally include the ghosts haunting Ransom, poor guy

John Johnson the existential goalie 110% has all of his dialogue appear in a speech bubble as he talks (though we don’t see him), but the words are Star Wars intro style

Also I just want Ollie and Wicks randomly appearing throughout the series and commenting on things

IMAGINE HEARING JACK’S VOICE WITH A FRENCH CANADIAN ACCENT

JACK SPEAKING FRENCH

JACK AS AN UGLY BABY

JACK JACK JACK JACK JACK

Bitty and his accent!!!

I’ll probably think of more later (and please add more!), but just - Check Please: the Animated Series!!!

When you realize you and your friends have literally just become Miwa and Moe

I just love the book so much, man

forgot to say that, without Howl chasing girls and Sophie resenting him for it, the film completely erases part of the point of Sophie being old.  Wynne Jones is using an idea that Beauvoir talked about - that being an old woman is both tragic (as we lose male attention/attractiveness) and freeing (as we are freed from the male gaze).  the idea is that with being old comes liberation, and the true meaning of what it is to be a woman, as society no longer forces gender norms on us.

Sophie is free from Howl’s attentions and therefore safe from harm (a big part of the book is the fact that Sophie believes he eats women’s hearts, and him chasing girls proves this to her).  she takes solace in the fact that she’s old, and finds it freeing.  when she learns more about Howl (notably: that he doesn’t eat hearts and that he’s not evil), she starts to curse her age and resent him chasing girls.  BUT she remains old OF HER OWN VOLITION - Howl notes that she’s perpetuating the spell by wishing to remain “in disguise”.  there are SO many layers to this, and lots to do with gender politics - if she’s still old Sophie can’t get hurt, she likes the freedom, etc.  but of course on a personal level being old is her denying her feelings for Howl, and also a representation of her low self esteem - being old is a defence mechanism and protection, both on a gender level and a personal one.

and the film kinda… loses this?  the only thing that remains is being old = low self esteem.  which really sucks.  because there’s SO MUCH MORE to Sophie being old in the book (perspective I already mentioned), and a HUGE amount of this is gender politics.  that the film just erases.

Twilight Was Written for the Wrong Genre

Seriously, these books should never have been written as a romance - they were clearly meant to be a comedy!

Vampires stuck in high school for all of eternity and then giving said vampires ridiculous powers that could lead to hilarity if they just bothered to interact with humans? ALL GOLD. 

You can’t tell me that Emmett Cullen didn’t casually lift and shift his car over in clear views of humans because he realized he parked outside of the lines. 

You can’t me that Alice never trolled people by randomly commenting on future events (saying “ouch” right before someone walks face first into a locker) and then acting like she never said that in the first place. 

You can’t tell me that Eddie never got so pissed off at humanity that he didn’t repeat people’s thoughts back at them like an annoying little kid (and then just saying they’re easy to read, which is basically the equivalent to fluorescents and adrenal rush as far as lies go).

It just works so much better if we ignore the romance and just focus on vampires who just forget to act human sometimes

One of my favourite items ever left behind at my work has to be this fancy-looking cane. It didn’t seem like anything special (a bit of pretty detail work, sure), but then my co-worker picked it up one time and it rattled. So, he tried unscrewing it, and you know what that cane was?

A DAGGER CANE.

Like this:

Seriously, the top part of this cane is a dagger!?!?!? Totally unexpected, probably pretty dangerous, but now all I can imagine is Kaz Brekker wielding one of these bad boys and duping everyone into thinking he’s unarmed.