" She's A Tornado With Pretty Eyes And A Heartbeat. "

" She's a tornado with pretty eyes and a heartbeat. "

"I'm A Mess of Unfinished Thoughts"

Sometimes I sit here and wonder why.... Why am I so lucky to have someone like you in my life and why.... Why does someone like you love someone like me. NOT, saying it's a bad thing to love me but it's just something that I always is at the tip top of my head. I'm always thinking of why this, why that and why why why. Anyways, I love you Matthew and I hope that you ALWAYS know how much I care. I love you xoxo

Tris

Mixed Signals

These mixed signals I get from you, will be the end of me

The insanity of drug addiction has you so conflicted. You know that getting high will kill you, you hate living in the despair that active addiction brings. you want to escape from this hell, you want to be doped up out of your mind. Some days you want to fight for your life, others you hope this shot will kill you.  you want all of this to end yet you want to continue feeling that high...  Sometimes you’re clean and you want desperately to stay that way while simultaneously wanting to use drugs.

I really don't know what to say or hoe to exactly say what it is I want to say to you. You have me going throu so many emotions in this time of our relationship. One day I feel as if you love me more than anything in this world and that i am your number 1. But then the next you make me feel as id I am nothing and that you wouldn't care if we never spoke again. When you make me feel on top of the world when you make me feel loved. You make me feel like nothing bad can touch me or come in between the 2 of us and you also make me feel like no other girl is. Better for you than I am. But when you make me feel down and so alone it puts strain on our relationship. when you make me feel like i am nothing to you and when you can just turn around and walk away from me so easily...it makes me feel so worthless and sad. Im so so so sad when you make me feel the negative feelings that you do. I hate those feelings. You've always made me feel comfortable and never along but the more days that pass by the more and more i feel so alone and hopeless. I've been trying so damn hard to hang out and not give up. To just make it to the next day and that everything will be fine but sometimes it isn't and im not okay with that. I miss the way that you were with me...with us. I miss you. I really hope and pray that this is just a phase that you and i are going through and that we will return to the way that we were. I love you so very much and hope that wr can get through this like we've gotten through everything else that was meant to tear us apart. I love you Matthew James Griffie. I hope you always know this and always know your the best thing that has ever happen to me. Xoxo Love. Tris