Haha My Bastard Son Got An Update

Haha my bastard son got an update <3

Me logging on to any social media platform

“Hey guys are you ready to beat the shit out of me!!???”

💙Obey Me Headcannons + OC💙

Lucifer

He has a peacock tail in demon form and I refuse to believe otherwise

He preens his wings regularly but you'll often find his black feathers littering the House of Lamentations during certain parts of the year

He resists the urge to pet every dog he sees, big dogs? Yes. Little dogs? Yes, he likes all dogs but Cerberus is his favorite ofc

Sometimes you'll find him outside after he's finished with his work in the late hours of the night, seemingly talking to himself, but it feels more like he's talking to the Moon

Mammon

Surrender all of your shinies to him immediately he wants all of them, that a new shiny bracelet? It's his now. New sparkly necklace? Gone. Pretty hair clip you go recently? Do you even need to ask

He has a shiny object from all of his brothers as a keepsake, even one from Satan, who knows how he got it

Kleptomania™ your items are not safe

HATES magpies, he doesn't know why he just doesn't like magpies. He thinks they're jerks

Leviathan

When he found out about the existence of Hatsune Miku trough a Ruri-Chan collab he became a Miku fan too (Ruri-Chan is still forever tho)

Handcrafted cosplays out the wahzoo, expert craftsmanship, Asmodeus seems to really like this side of him

He made his own Ruri-Chan plushie, spent like 3 days on it because everything had to be perfect

You WILL cosplay with him, no ifs, ands or buts, PUT ON THE DRESS.

Satan

All of his bookmarks are cat themed or cat related

Sebastian Michaelis' best friend™

Sometimes, he has an inexplicable urge to bask in daylight for seemingly no actual reason other than it seems like a really appealing, sometimes he'll join Belphegor when he's sleeping in the sun

If you throw a cucumber at him he'll jump at least 5 feet into the air before yelling at you

Asmodeus

Owns an abhorrent amount of makeup, all of which will be going on your face

Who needs acrylic nails with claws like that? Girl bye

Unironically listens to Barbie Girl while doing his makeup, everyone can hear it in the morning,

He's a Mettaton kinnie trough and trough, he's got the glamor, the confidence, the bloodlust, the power, I wouldn't be surprised if he owned a pair of thigh hight hot pink heeled boots

Beelzebub

A very large, hungry, affectionate puppy

When he found out that humans make popcorn bags almost the size of a full grown man he BEGGED Lucifer to please get one for the next movie night

He got his popcorn in the end and was extremely happy about it, insert happy bear noises here

He likes looking at the Stars, they make him feel happy whenever he's alone, and finds comfort in watching them before he goes to sleep

Belphegor

Sometimes he'll have dreams of everyone together back in the Celestial Realm. They make him sad after he wakes up knowing it was just a dream but he enjoys them while they last.

Hypersomnia™

Wanna see someone get dragged like a ragdoll from one class to another while they're sleeping?

Always drinks a glass of warm milk before sleeping for like a week straight, good luck waking him up unless someone is literally dying

Yingpei

"MC please sit dOWN-"

Please stop giving him heart attacks for three seconds he can only handle so much at a time-

He doesn't understand any typical human slang, living in a village cut off from most of society turns out to disconnect someone from from your typical human being

There's something off about him sometimes, as if he knows more then he should for someone supposedly so disconnected from regular people, strangely enough, Lucifer seems to trust him, Solomon fears him to an extent

Adorable borders can be found here!

(ignore the tags)

This is mah bby Mexico

If you want any info on him just ask, but just do I have some of the basics down:

Do not leave him and America alone for two long

His best frens are The Philippines and Brazil

His "older brother" is Chile

He is frens with China and Russia

He refuses giving up on trying to teach England how to cook

He loves animals

You'll rarely ever see him sad

I ship Mexico and China, plz don't hurt me, it legitimately started out as an JOKE AND I GOT CARRIED AWAY.

Portal but with America and Mexico rffcfcfy

P o r t a l i a

🇨🇳ChiMex/ChinaMex/ChuMex🇲🇽 comic, this was supposed to be uploaded on Christmas but I procrastinated

Ya yeet

Short but yes