Jaune: *Frantically Searching Around Beacon* Ruby!? Ruby!?

Jaune: *Frantically searching around beacon* Ruby!? Ruby!?

Coco: *Atop staircase* Ruby!? Ruby!?

Jaune: Is your girlfriend named Ruby too?

Coco: No, but I figured if she's banging a guy like you, I got a shot. Ruby!?

Jaune: Wait what!? Ruby!?

Coco: Ruby!?

Jaune: RUBY!?

Jaune: *In hospital bed* Doc says I should make a full recovery. So long as we avoid as much physical contact as we can.

Ruby: Oh thank goodness. Guess we’ll need to be more careful from now on. *Gets ready to leave*

Jaune: Aren’t you forgetting something~

Ruby: Alright you goof. *Chuckles before blowing him a kiss* Get better soon~

Jaune: *Heart flatlines*

Ruby: AAAAUUHHH!!!

Jaune: *staring at Ruby’s thighs*

Jaune: I want them to crush my skull.

Ruby: What?

Jaune: I said this is such bull.

Jaune: Alright, General, I've landed.

Ironwood: Great work, Arc. Commencing Operation Flying Arcs.

Jaune: You got it. But first, let me get something to eat. *Rummages through bag*

Ironwood: ...

Jaune: Why isn't there food in my bag?

Ironwood: Well, we had to make room for your medicine, bandages, dust-

Jaune: Ok, that's great. What the fuck am I supposed to eat?

Ironwood: ...

Jaune: No.

Ironwood: Arc.

Jaune: I'm not eating a fucking tree frog.

Ironwood: This is what you were trained for.

Jaune: Why don't you eat a Tree Frog?

Ironwood: No... I don't want to.

Jaune: Exactly. So you better be sending me some goddamn luchables.

Ironwood: Arc, those don't even exist in this world.

Jaune: I'm fighting a lady with a Grimm arm who shoots fire out of her fingertips, a mutated human Grimm hound, and Ozpin's magical, immortal, Grimm ex. But luchables, that's where we draw the line?

Ironwood: *Sighs* Fine. I'll get you your lunchables.

Jaune: *Smiles* Bitchin'

Jaune: What are you doing?

Ren: I'm posting false information on the web.

Jaune: Why?

Ren: It's fun. Someone picks up a strand of false information, spreads it around and before you know it, a panic is created. Then you just sit back and watch the chaos.

Jaune: I really should not have introduced you to Twitter.

I mean... Is this even a contest