Very Useful, Don't Get Me Wrong, I Love Fem Things, Especially Clothes, But We Never Really Get To See

very useful, don't get me wrong, I love fem things, especially clothes, but we never really get to see the masc side of fairygrunge (:

some masc fairy grunge outfits🪲🤎

Day 2

Found out last night that I'll probable never talk to Adolpho again, which breaks my heart and makes me feel so angry at myself and so, so guilty, but that was also oddly freeing to learn.

It's weird, I love him to absolute pieces, and I may never even get him back as a friend, but it feels like now I almost have permission to stop constantly thinking about him. If he wants me to put in the work to gain forgiveness, I gladly will, but as it stands, it's unlikely. So, in my mind, if you love someone, set them free, and if having to contact with me would make him happier, then I'll withstand it for his sake.

Again, this does make it easier to stop obsessing over him, and to give Niani the attention he genuinely deserves, even though some of my hopes and dreams are crushed (all be it by my own doing).

I'm still making an attempt to improve myself, maybe a tiny bit in hopes Adolpho will forgive me, but mostly for Niani and preserving and improving our relationship.

my current mood

do you ever get hit with a breeze that carries the smell of soft memory and understand why melancholy was considered a sickness?

I just want to live in a big haunted Victorian house in walking distance of a bakery, a library, a bookshop, a forest, and a river and where I can befriend local ghosts and forest spirits. Not sure why that's asking so much.

Meerithic🦋