Shisui: No Offense, But A Waiter Could Literally Murder Me And I'd Still Tip 20%.

Shisui: No offense, but a waiter could literally murder me and I'd still tip 20%.

Itachi: I'd actually tip more if they murder me, that's great customer service

Everyone and Naruto

Person C: (nagging on and on about something unimportant to the current moment)

Person A: (Picks up the remote control and starts clicking it at person C)

Person C:Person A, What are you doing?

Person B: Their trying to turn you off

Person A: (to person B) they've got to have a better setting than this

There are different type of people. I am, in fact Kakashi for most of my day

Naruto; I hope something good happens!

Sakura; I hope nothing bad happens...

Sasuke; I hope nothing happens.

Kakashi; I hope the bad thing that is inevitably going to happen is at least pretty funny

More Itachi and Shisui headcanon

Because I love them and their dynamic

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In a non massacre!AU

They ship the children together

Itachi is on sasusaku while shisui is for sasunaru

They still like the other ship thought

The kids still don't know about it

While Kakashi is well aware and does everything in his power to let one of them win the bet

Yes they placed a bet on which ship would sail

The loser has to take the winner out for dinner

Itachi just wanted free dinner

Shisui answered with "mood" and shook his hand

Kakashi is being corrupted by both of them

He just wanted to mess with the kids, but if he gets something out of it he isn't going to complain

Itachi sometimes takes out Sakura to help her sort out plans

Shisui has a harder time to make Naruto understand his feelings

Sasuke was hella suspicious about their little get together with his teammates

So he bribed Kakashi

Moral of the story Sasuke prohibited his teammates to go out with his family and Kakashi got a new copyright od icha icha

How he got it is still a secret

When Shisui and Itachi have a free day they sped it together

They mostly lay down somewhere and wonder about life

And when they go out to drink Itachi has to be the babysitter

Shisui is the extroverted one between the two, so it's not surprising that he laughs a lot more

His laugh actually lights the place

And attracts a lot of people too

Itachi gets annoyed easily but this

So he puts on a genjutsu

He likes to enjoy Shisui by himself thank you very much

He swear he's not jealous

Shisui doesn't believe him and teases him

He actually enjoys it more like this

But he's not willing to say it because he doesn't want to give up his teasing privileges

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Itachi headcanons

Because I love him and his pretty brain

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Let's start with his plans

His plans have plans

That man has skills

I am convinced that he has a backup plan of anything.

No toilet paper? Oh, no worries. He has a scroll with it

Your cat run away? Just go to him and he'll found a way in merely a minute

On a sad note...

I think he is a silent cryer

Yes, we did saw him cry, but you know, never a full blast

I think that even if he has a full panic attack going on he would be so silent that no one notice until they look at him

I headcanon him to play with his hands a lot

He's nervous? "Oh, look how slickly the ring goes around my finger"

He's bored? "My hands can do this? Wow, such things I learn"

It's either he plays with his hands or his necklance

As I said in Shisui's headcanons I think they hugged a lot and Shisui had a thing for Itachi's hair

Itachi jokingly said Shisui had a relationship with his hair and he needed to ask him for permission before he could marry them

Shisui took him seriously

So he got a pretty hair tie

he dressed up

And he asked Itachi to marry his hair

Itachi didn't know what to say or do

He couldn't understand if he was joking or not

So he said yes and wondered on the meaning of life

He still has the hair tie somewhere in his belongings and he puts it on from time to time

In a non massacre!AU:

He left anbu after a few years, preferring a jonin rank along helping the police force

But he didn't take any kids to teach

He had enough with Sasuke, Shisui and Naruto

Sakura was the only one who helped him not to rip his hair off

But she's ready to do it herself whenever he stumbles through the hospital doors

It doesn't really happened frequently, but when it happens Shisui hides in fear to be the next in Sakura's list

He definetly loves animals and has at least a cat and a dog in his house

Whenever Sasuke goes over to his house the cat just run away while the dog loves to be cuddled

We stan chicken Vs Itachi in this blog

I said what I said

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They're the type of...Haikyuu boys edition

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IWAUZUMI

He's the type to touch every time he kiss. He loves to grip the back of the neck and feel the hair in his hand or he would grip the waist...hard

SUGAWARA

He's the type to kiss every inch of his partner's face. He just loves to shower his partner in kisses while he hears their laugh

KUROO

That type of person who just goes silent for a good minute before going all out to tickle. If you see him in silent mode... RUN

KAGEYAMA

He's the type to just stand there until you say something to him. He does that every time until he's comfortable enough to sit on his own(It took him months). He needs his time, okay?

TANAKA

The car guy. You know when guys pull their arm in the passenger seat so that they can see where they're going with the retro? He thinks he's super hot while doing it

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