And Then They Aren't Finished And Haven't Been Updated Since 2011 And You Feel The Urge To Write A Fanfiction

And then they aren't finished and haven't been updated since 2011 and you feel the urge to write a fanfiction about that fanfiction but feel as though you can't live up to that legacy -

reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

these were a hit on twitter so figure i’d share on tumblr dot com. context = everyone was making fun of a book that was marketed with this same format. enjoy the capri versions

Bhunivelze’s Double Deity, made from the power of (or honestly just straight up the bodies of) the gods Lindzei and Pulse. Just casually in the hands of a 14 (technically) year old who got psychologically tortured and possessed by Bhuni-boy into being his eyes and ears.

I GOT HOPE'S FR ABILITY AND MAN. WHAT THE FUCK. JUMPSCARE

Look, I love the Castlevania series and the Netflix adaptation made 3 great seasons ("Um there are 4 seasons" LIKE I SAID, 3 GREAT SEASONS), but we have got to talk about how disappointing it is that the main trio never met or even knew the existence of Hector and Isaac - or honestly, that entire half of the plot. I will forever find it weird that the show set up two related but never intersecting plot threads (and arguably a third, go figure during the worst season).

It's sweet and empowering that both of them found their own ways to live before and after Dracula's death, with Isaac being a total badass and even progressing to a better person despite seeing how unfair, cruel, and rude the world is - to the point that he defeats Carmilla not JUST because she was partly responsible for Dracula's death but because he actually wanted to make the world a better place. But even though Isaac could arguably be founding an entire empire and generation of peace, he and Hector don't even seem to know about Alucard's existence or contributions, let alone Trevor and Sypha.

We can debate Hector and Lenore's fucked up relationship all day, but in the end the two of them DID end up bonding through all the lies and deceit. They were able to actually talk to one another and have the other listen; in the end, both of them were just born in different worlds on different sides. Lenore genuinely seemed to want to settle things peacefully, but she got left behind in a world that valued only overwhelming strength; she decides she can't live as a prisoner even though Hector was no doubt stronger than her for enduring his own imprisonment and subjugation, but I think Lenore was already on her way to losing herself. Despite what she did to Hector, she wanted to at least believe she understood him; even though she was a sympathetic vampire, she still believed knowing enough to control someone was the only way they could be friends - so when it turns out Hector was plotting the downfall of Carmilla and her buddies, unfortunate Lenore had to be betrayed as well. Even if Hector wanted her to live, she was a living contradiction. A vampire who is physically very strong and intimidating, but a woman who other male vampires have looked down upon, and even male humans. A creature who feeds on humans, but one who wants to settle things peacefully. She absolutely had a role in Carmilla's gang of women just surviving, but in Carmilla's mad conquest, she was useless at best and a hindrance at worst.

In the end, Lenore was one of the few vampires that might have been sympathetic to the human side of the argument, but she physically couldn't live like that. I believed Lenore genuinely wasn't capable of turning her whole worldview upside down and aiding humanity in any way - being beneath them. Dracula opened himself up to one human and it destroyed him; he saved Hector and Isaac, but he also sacrificed himself and forced Isaac away, that was the extent of his personal affairs with them. I think it's fundamentally difficult for vampires to adopt human ideologies and empathy, making Alucard the only vampire ally we really have in the series - because he's only half. Unlike Alucard, she is a full vampire. She has a divide that she can't just bridge like he can.

Imagine if Alucard got to meet the only other humans beside his mother who genuinely looked up to and cared about his father. What would Isaac and Hector have to say to the son of the man they had admired and then lost as well? Imagine Alucard meeting another human who may have even fallen in love with a vampire, but who understands how far their worlds pulled each other apart. Or maybe Sypha can relate to having her eyes opened to a world outside her Speaker family. Imagine a discussion with Lenore about what it means to be caught between wanting to make peace with humans and knowing how much harm they cause - her actually getting a sympathetic vampire perspective from someone like Alucard who wouldn't look down on her.

Imagine the tension that could come from Trevor meeting a Forgemaster, Isaac trying to explain his control over Night Creatures and his ability to even make them fight for a sympathetic cause. Both Isaac and Trevor have experience being the outcasts, understanding how awful humans can be, but they both found their way to still fighting for the right thing. Trevor understands why killing Dracula's wife would make him want to purge the world in retribution, but he still knows humans are worth fighting for. Isaac fully abandoned his faith in humanity and believed in Dracula completely, and even THEN he managed to find the good amongst the rabble. Is it right to make Night Creatures from the dead, even if they were bad people? Even if it's to champion a good cause? Even if Hector and Isaac have full control over them without a potential for any sort of rebellion?

What I'm saying is, I love the idea of a new Castlevania series, but nothing will beat the OG season 1 and 2, and season 3 should have been answering questions and tying up loose ends - not going off on at least 3, 4 tangents that were just meant to come out of nowhere and make things shitty again after our happy ending and I guess they're kinda related but not really, so now we can fix the new shitty stuff and have ANOTHER happy ending and avoid showing anything resembling resolutions, just teaser after teaser for the fanfics to finish up.

Anyway so I'm going to the fanfics and if I don't come back, tell the Final Fantasy rants I love them-

Person A: "I'll take you apart with my teeth."

Person B: "...In a sexy way or a cannibalistic way?"

Person A: *smiling* "One of those, yes."

Optional Person A responses:

"Why not both?"

"It's a surprise."

Just "Yes."

Let's talk about Tidus and Yuna, shall we?

As someone who enjoys FFX, this probably should have come a long time ago. Tidus and Yuna's characters in the original Final Fantasy 10 are excellent.

Tidus successfully portrays a seventeen-year-old boy in this fantasy situation - slightly annoying, slightly arrogant because of his famous father and his own famous Blitzball career, and utterly overwhelmed by being thrust into an entirely new world without knowing if he can go home.

While FFX tries to fake you out into thinking it's a time-travel story where he has been thrust 1000 years into the future, the city of Zanarkand is a physical location in Spira that just requires you to be made of pyreflies to enter (aka dead or a summon). This makes Tidus essentially a summon, which is an interesting theory for another day. This means Zanarkand is just a place that hasn't changed in 1000 years, likely in some infinite loop imagining and reimagining people who had once lived there - warping them slowly over time, but ultimately just trying to keep the city alive (which is how we got Tidus from Shuyin, I think, idk I really don't care for 10-2's plot). The fayth were trying to imagine what would happen if Zanarkand was never destroyed, but I think they simply would have started running out of ideas for new people who lived there, so it did end up looping old characters into slightly newer forms. Like fanfiction characters, honestly.

But it's so great to see Tidus's journey. He starts the game a confused outsider just trying to survive, someone who doesn't mind speaking up about how he feels and what he believes. His outsider perspective provides a means for the audience to be introduced to Spira's world building as well, and we also get to see an unbiased point of view to Yevon's religion - and not necessarily a disrespectful one. Tidus, though he doesn't preach Yevon as a devout follower for his entire life, still tries to make an effort to be respectful of the good parts. When Shelinda corrects him, "That's MAESTER Seymour, or LORD Seymour", he says "Sorry, I'll be careful."

He dashes into the Cloister of Trials to save the summoner who might be in danger, regardless of the rules or presincts, because he's got a childish outlook life and a good heart despite his many inital arrogant qualities. He wants the best outcome, he's willing to believe in doing the right thing even when it's hard, and yeah it's unrealistic at times, but it's a breath of fresh air for the people of Spira who live rather docile lives always in fear of Sin and dedicating themselves to the kindness of Yevon's teachings. He admits "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea" after he breaks the rules for the first time, and watching Yuna on her pilgrimage and how she interacts with the people who admire her for her father and her own summoner status allows Tidus to humble himself while still remaining fundamentally defiant to anything he doesn't agree is right - aka Yuna sacrificing herself.

Religion isn't always a bad thing, and FFX makes a point to emphasize this. The people of Spira are kind and respectful, banding together in the hard times and unting together to have hope. Yuna is initially a beacon of hope - all summoners are - making people smile and flock to her wherever she goes, and she gives people respect and encourages them to have faith not only in her, but in themselves as well. Even when she's branded a traitor, a significant number of people recognize Yuna's dedication to the people and immediately believe the next tale about it all being an evil Al-Bhed rumor.

Yevon's corruption is just a few people abusing their power, twisting a good message into a cult-like dedication. Wakka is the most notable case, but technically all of the characters go through a period of blindly believing in the teachings and Yevon and eventually finding their own path. Even Tidus, who didn't grow up believing in Yevon or knowing its teachings, finds that the people's way of life living in rightful fear of Sin has them NEEDING Yevon and the messages of kindness and compassion it preaches. Maybe they shouldn't believe in everything the Maesters say Yevon is, but he can understand the intentions behind it and how the regular, uncorrupt people just live their lives trying to be good.

Now that I think about it, the parallels between Yevon and Blitzball actually make a lot of sense - Blitzball is the entertainment people go to in order to forget about the fears of Sin, and Yevon is the religion people worship in an effort to band together and have hope against Sin. Huh. No wonder a Blitzball sign for victory became a religious thing.

Anyway, Wakka eventually apologizes! He recognizes that the Al-Bhed are just people. They don't believe in Yevon's ways BECAUSE they care, just from a different perspective. Just because they don't believe in Yevon doesn't mean they're savages, and when their Home is destroyed by merciless Guado, he hears them singing the Hymn of the Fayth to respect their fallen as well. Wakka admits he didn't want to hear anything he didn't agree with, that he was a jerk, and Cid agrees that he's hated Yevonites just for being Yevonites too.

Here's a Wakka glare just for our collective amusement.

Who were we talking about? Ah, Tidus.

Tidus is indeed a whiny character, childish, toeing the line between humor and annoyance. But he matures throughout the course of his journey, caring for the entire crew but Yuna especially. When they reach Zanarkand and learn the truth about the Final Summoning, Lulu tells him, "If you want everything, you'll end up with nothing," and he replies, "But I want everything!" His unwavering hope and optimism even when everyone is telling him it's impossible is necessary for the story, to tell the characters that yes, your sacrifices will be pretty and give temporary relief, and you'll be dead and martyred and remembered - but how can it be right? It's not.

From his basic, outsider, new perspective on this world he only just joined, it's not right. He didn't grow up with this being normal, so even in comparison to the Al-Bhed, he knows that it's not.

There's a saying somewhere that I forget the source, but basically it goes like "Children are raised to believe the world is good and fair but are outraged when they grow to learn it is not." Tidus asks what an ADULT would do, sacrificing a summoner and just moving on with their lives like it was fine to give one life for many, just happy it wasn't them. Adults are indoctrinated into a way of life and a way of thinking, and it's extremely hard to get people to change their minds - but not, as FFX proves, impossible. Both he and Yuna are still kids, kids who are still able to grow up to see the world for what it truly is.

Yuna was betrayed by Yevon, all her beliefs torn down and the hope she had placed on the system shattered. But she continued her pilgrimage. She dreamt of all the fun things she could do if she quit, knew that all of her friends and Guardians would accept her choice, but she knew she could never let it go. She stood up to the Ronso saying that she was fighting for the people, not the temples or Yevon - impressing Kelk Ronso who says she has an iron will that towers over Gagazette's peaks.

She has given her everything to this trip, but it's not fair. Just because it's the right thing to do doesn't mean it's right - and you need a character like Tidus to put his foot down and say no. Everyone is willing to sacrifice themselves, everyone is willing to be the one to die so that others can be happy. But it's not fair. It's not right to let anyone die, even if they're willing, even if it's one for many. It's a temporary fix, it's feeding an endless cycle of lies and false hope. It's not real.

But it is YUNA who ultimately makes the choice to say no. All this time, she's been insisting she keeps going despite both Rikku and Tidus's protests and desperate attempts to get her to change her mind. She's been the most resolute out of all of them to go through with this, but in the end, it's not Tidus or Rikku who kill Yunalesca before she can get the chance or present her a stirring enough argument or some alternative. No, it's Yuna who asks directly what the cycle of the Final Summoning and Sin mean, hearing that the hope they offer is false, and when asked who will be her fayth, everyone is silent, waiting for her answer - because it is Yuna'a choice, Yuna's pilgrimage, Yuna's story. And she says, "No one."

She would have gladly died for the people of Spira, but she is done. She isn't going to join into this cycle of death and lies. Her father chose to become a summoner and defeated Sin, but it was because he truly believed that it would make a difference. He died because he had hope, and maybe it was indeed false hope, but somewhere deep down, he really did want to find a way to stop Sin for good. He and Jecht went into that battle hoping that Jecht and Auron would find a way to break the cycle. And let's be honest, they did. Tidus and Yuna were brought up differently, but they end up seeing each other's sides of the story and agreeing on so many things. The people are worth fighting for even when they're being misled.

Yunalesca's argument is that sorrow will always exist, and false hope is all anyone can offer to soften the blow. But Yuna is ready to live with her sorrow and brave whatever comes from it. She will find her own hope, even without knowing there will be another way, and she knows she will conquer it. She proved it long before she reached Zanarkand, after enduring Yevon's betrayal; now her methods have changed, but her end goal is as resolute as it's always been. She's going to defeat Sin, and she's going to give people REAL hope, even when it's hard.

Yuna says no to Yunalesca. She joins in the fight to destroy the Final Summoning forever, and slowly she learns that she can function beyond Yevon's teachings. The team who made 10-2 seemed to think that Yuna needed to toughen up and become some kind of badass (which they failed at portraying, Yuna is an utter wreck in that game and let's not talk about how Rikku devolved), but she was already a freaking strong character! She stood up for herself the entire game as a strong-willed summoner willing to give her life for the cause, but she also stood up for herself by declaring she would LIVE. It's entirely in character for her, even when she's changing her mind and broadening her horizons. Yuna was the character who smiled even knowing she was on a long, slow journey that would end in her death, who was willing to do it if it would make others smile too. That is a strong character right there.

I do agree that she might not know what to do with her life now that she doesn't plan to die, but come on, don't make her into a wanna-be who tries to pretend like she doesn't care only to reveal yup she cares, what a pushover. Her caring nature is what makes her great to watch! Frustrating when she tries to do everything on her own with the Seymour thing, but entirely in character. Empowering when she makes her own choices and decides for herself. I don't know why she does nothing for two whole years during Eternal Calm but okay maybe I can see it. But for her to try doing a 180, respecting no one and no one respecting her even though she DEFEATED SIN was such a mistake. Plus the mini games in 10-2 are utterly atrocious. Anyway, tangent over.

But then the script has flipped at the end of 10. Tidus is the one that realizes Zanarkand is what Sin is protecting, that defeating Sin will make the whole city and everyone made from the dream disappear. He is the one who has to sacrifice himself for Sin to be defeated. Unlike summoners, however, Sin won't come back if he does this. He's grown across the journey just like Jecht did, following a summoner and learning what it means to want to give your life living in hope that it'll save everyone else.

Yuna has to sacrifice the Aeons she's forged her own bond with - which, remember, every summoner makes a unique bond with the aeons. She has to say goodbye to Auron, see Sir Jecht only one more time as he gives his life as an Aeon and uses the last of his power to give his sword for the final battles to fight on (did ya notice that?). Then, in the final tragic scene, Tidus becomes intangible and tries to say a cheerful goodbye, apologizing for not being able to show her Zanarkand like they had pondered when Yuna was dreaming of the things she'd do if she abandoned her pilgrimage and lived. Now, Yuna is the one having to say goodbye to the one sacrificing their life. The soft piano, the wailing of the colorful pyreflies as they disperse with all the dead, it's freaking beautiful man.

Yuna's final line hits hard too, her speech about how everyone has lost homes, dreams, and friends. They can build new homes and new dreams, even if they can't get back lost friends. "The people and the friends that we have lost...or the dreams that have faded...never forget them." Get it? Be...Because Tidus is a dream that faded? Anyway I'll just be crying in the corner over here don't mind me.

In the end, it's sort of understandable why Yuna just sits around in Besaid after the end of 10 during Eternal Calm. Maybe. Not only did she have no plans for her life after Sin was defeated (thinking she would be the one to die), but she lost her entire purpose in life AND she's reeling from the fact that even though she made the choice not to sacrifice herself just for everyone else's false hope, someone still had to give their life - Tidus. Someone still ended up dying for the cause, even after all she went through deciding to live.

The ONLY moments I actually respect Yuna from 10-2 is during the end, when Nooj volunteers a plan to give his life to win the battle (which was already stupid even before Yuna's speech because we're talking about an Unsent, Nooj your plan does nothing to stop someone who's already dead, idiot). Yuna's lines are extremely good and well voice acted too: "'We had no choice.' Always 'We had no choice.' Those are our magic words. We repeat them to ourselves again and again. But you know... The magic never worked! The only thing we're left with is regret. No. I don't want this anymore. I don't want friends to die...or fade away. I don't want battles where we have to lose in order to win."

It also demonstrates better than that stupid minigame how difficult it was for Yuna to have destroyed the aeons she had forged a bond with. What I'm saying is, fuck Beclem and everyone else who dares disrespect Yuna, summoners, and everything they went through. Even though that time and age in Spira might be over, that's NO reason to immediately scoff in the face of everything all those people went through - everything YUNA sacrificed and endured for the sake of these ungrateful whelps.

Both Tidus and Yuna were excellent protagonists of X, despite both of them having a lot of growing to do. In conclusion, let me make use of this fun poll feature if you made it this far down: