Yeast Infection

Yeast Infection

I once met a voracious strumpet 

Who'd shtupped pies, eclairs and a crumpet.

Hell, she'd even go

For some old pastry dough;

She'd surely find some way to hump it.

I like your post with the Haifa street art! I know some basic 'Bic so here we go: in the first one with the read background it says "Al-Massalla" though I'm not sure what it means, maybe it's the street name? The picture with the poster of the hand says "Ayrbii" meaning like Arab. The one with the couple kissing says "Hhob mashlii" which I believe roughly means wonderous love. (A phrase with the same root is masha allah, meaning thank God for beautiful things.) I hope that helps! Thanks again!!

Thanks so much for the translation! You’re wonderful!

I wish we could take credit for this, alas, we cannot. On the other hand, I might send them my resume. I might not be a Rabbi versed in Dark Talmudic Arts, and my Aramaic might be a tad rusty, but I could probably figure it out. Plus, I'm comfortable working with clay: that's sort of necessary, no? It wouldn't do to have a golem if its terribly disfigured. Lastly I know how to ward off Gollum: throw potatoes at him! He wouldn't know what to do!

Best of Craigslist: Looking for Rabbi Versed in DARK TALMUDIC ARTS to create GOLEM.

WANTED:  One Rabbi versed in the Dark Talmudic Arts to create one Golem for household of three. Golem will perform rudimentary household chores such as dishes & sweeping, basic Math Tutoring for our daughter in 3rd grade and basic household security. Golem must be obedient and fairly unobtrusive on our every-day lives.  We will supply all materials needed (clay, twigs, calfskin parchment, etc) needed to create the Golem. All you need to do is use your magical ancient Rabbinic skills to animate said Golem!  Please note! We are looking for a Rabbi to create a Golem: an anthropomorphic being created from inanimate matter from Jewish folk-lore, NOT Gollum: a former Hobbit turned into monster and looking for “precious”. This is important! We have no interest in living with Gollum. We want a Golem. Please respond, serious inquiry only. 

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Nothing puts me off of ice pops like wrinkly testicles

Old Frank, at the beach nearby Cambridge

Would show off his favorite appendage.

His Speedo's snug size 

Proves he's circumcised.

From people to fish, all took umbrage.

Drive-by psychoanalysis

A matronly, sweet psych professor

Was stopped by a burly aggressor.

Said she "These displays

Are Oedipal plays

For love, mother (fucking) obsessor." 

The Endlessly Zooming Golden Spiral - Made with Processing.

I uploaded this anyway even though I haven’t figured out how to make faster animations yet.