Angel God Put In Charge Of Naming F1 Drivers: Daniel Ricciardo, Yuki Tsunoda, Max Verstappen, Zhou Guyanyu...

Angel God put in charge of naming F1 drivers: Daniel Ricciardo, Yuki Tsunoda, Max Verstappen, Zhou Guyanyu... these seem pretty good.

God: boring. Make one american.

Angel: Uh. Okay. Mario Andretti?

God: too italian. Make an american one.

Angel: too itali- okay. American. I can do that. Jim Hall.

God: more American.

Angel, sweating: S-Scott... Speed?

God: More.

Angel: more American than Scott Speed the racecar driver??? Um uh... Oh! Logan Hunter Sargeant!!!

God: TOO AMERICAN TOO AMERICAN SOUND THE ALARM WE'RE OFF BALANCE MAKE A FRENCH ONE OVERCOMPENSATE

Angel, sobbing: FUCK FUCK FUCK UHH PIERRE JEAN-JAQUES GASLY! IS THAT FRENCH ENOUGH?

God: yeah. Okay what do we have left.

Angel: OKAY. Okay. Um. Hmm *reads clipboard* we've got... huh. We've got two more drivers, three first names, but. Hm. Only one last name. What should we do? Make them brothers? That could-

God, smoking a cigarette: give all the first names to one guy.

Angel: wh.

God: all three first names. Give them to the one dude. That's it.

Angel: ...Okay. So we have George William Russell, and... what about the last one? I have the last name here, but-

God: Make him up a first name.

Angel: what?

God: did I stutter. I don't care. Use any random made up word you first think of.

Angel: but... alright. Um, Lando? Lando Norris? Okay, cool, then that's-

Another Angel, driving a large truck: new shipment of names here, boss!

Angel: no wait, it's fine, we've got names for them all!

God: nah, it's chill, we can just make another guy and give him all the extra names. Should be fine.

Angel: but there's like- sir, who ordered one first name, no middle names and... six hundred last names????

God, in the process of creating Carlos Sainz Vazquez de Castro Cenamor Rincón Rebollo Birto Moreno de Aranda de Anteriuga Tiapera Deltun... junior: I Am Ineffable.

James Vowles I’m begging you to stop talking

PIT: So pole position was Norris 19.32

Charles: yeah, no.... I don't care. Fuck.

for the monaco gp next year instead of the regular commentators can we have like ten retired drivers on a yacht with copious amounts of alcohol instead? like imagine jenson feeding nico multiple rounds of tequila shots and convincing him to drop brocedes lore so fucking insane it makes lewis' spidey senses tingle live on air. meanwhile, seb is trying to stop kimi from falling off said yacht every five seconds and mahk webbah is trying to either rope everyone into karaoke or is gushing about his adoptive son oscar. david is calling every driver who fucks their car into a wall a cunt and mika is on facetime with his husband and sipping a mai-tai in the hot tub and a least one of them is puking off the side of the boat in the end

Elliot Knight - Life Sentence (2018)