Nico Rosberg - Tumblr Posts

Nico speaking facts talking about Lando’s race in Singapore:

“There’s three moments here. And that’s so strange. I can’t remember myself, or Max Verstappen, or Lewis, when leading so comfortably with thirty seconds making three major mistakes like that. That was a bit strange. I know Singapore is so hard concentration [wise]. Physically it’s so, so tough. But it was… I don’t know what it’s down to that there’s so many little… But we know that from Lando that he tends to make those little errors all the time everywhere. We’ve seen that from him.”

Brocedes

Such an overrated conversation topic I know but I just needed to talk about it cause I keep seeing it. Ok, first off if you didn’t know Lewis and Nico were besties growing up because of their circumstances but ended up with an absolutely destroyed non-existent relationship after Lewis joins Mercedes. Personally for me this is one the saddest stories in F1 history because of the backstory behind it but was also a long time coming. Lewis and Nico became unlikely friends due to circumstances mostly because of the prejudice of other people. Nico for being the rich only son of a Formula 1 world champion, a very important one at that, and also looking very feminine. Lewis on the other hand for being a poor no name black kid in a white and expensive sport. Both being the same age and living in Europe were constantly competing with one another and seeing how the other was treated, they became friends. They constantly helped one another and pushed one another up until finally in the 2006 season they both debut in Formula 1. (Although Lewis makes his official F1 debut the year after in 2007.) They would both find themselves at opposite ends however, with Lewis only in his 2nd year becoming the youngest driver to ever become a world champion at the time, and being the only driver of color to this day to ever do so. Nico on the other side of things was barely getting by and scraping points while constantly being ridiculed along the way for how he looked. And the sad part was that not only were other drivers doing it but Lewis was too. His oldest and most trusted confidant being the very person to make fun of him and publicly humiliate him ultimately only hurting him further. I think this is why it was a long time coming when they just got to the point of hating each other by 2016, because it was all that pent up pain and little resentments piling on with the stress and hardships all coming to a head and bubbling over into one of the most bittersweet seasons of F1.

Brocedes, The build up and The blow up

So part 2 of my Brocedes essay. I saw a question of what sort of mind games Nico played and how bad were they that Lewis refuses to speak his name even 6 years after. A topic of conversation I never saw however was HOW Nico learned these mind games. Nico learned all of those by being put through them. Every team mate he has has left him mentally damaged from Mark Webber, to Michael Schumacher, to finally Lewis Hamilton. Mark was the one who popularized the nickname Brittany which lead to a lot of people calling Nico, the derogatory name that was given to him, as a punchline. Michael, often referred to as the Mind Games Warrior, using unorthodox and at times borderline cruel tactics to throw Nico off. Lewis making backhanded comments and using micro-aggression in his statements that although to most seem utterly normal and unassuming, he and Nico both knew that there was underlying malice. The mind games were never one sided Nico was just always more open about them. This is why I think that retirement was not only the best decision for Nico's mental health but also a final 'FU' to Lewis. By leaving on a high he never gave Lewis the chance to beat him to prove that he is the better driver, he just left. Lewis beat all his other competitors, Fernando, Jenson, Sebastian, but not Nico, never Nico. When Max beat him he had the excuse of it was taken from him unfairly, Max won through cheating. (I personally do not share the same sentiment however.) With Nico however he won fair and square, in equal machinery. The fans were rooting for Lewis, the team was rooting for Lewis, But Nico won. That is why Lewis never speaks Nico's name, because of the self disappointment that comes with it. Nico was and to this day still is the only person to ever make Lewis Hamilton doubt himself.

New vs Old F1

Current F1 is sexualized more than the old F1. This is mostly due to the fact that F1 has a larger reach now and there for is gaining more fans, some of which are just unhinged. But the thing is old F1 had more grounds to be hyper-sexualized. I mean they walk around shirtless, cAuSe wHY NOT. They were also a far better breed of twinks, like look at Nico and Seb. They don't make blonde twinks like that anymore. Like back then they were getting girlfriends left and right, having kids, and partying all while still being racing drivers. Now they're all in stable and healthy relationships, parties being few and far between, and more often than not their hobbies are Twitch and Golf. Max who is always hyper sexualized is a virgin. Charles is a sweetheart. Lando is a child. Yuki is tiny. noT MiCk.

*Seb batting his eyes giggling at everything that Michael says*

Nico: *scoffs* why is he acting so ditzy and sweet in front of an older driver when he's such a brat.

Jenson and Mark: *Having intense flashbacks to when they first met Nico*

*older drivers talking with the retired drivers turned sky sports eye candy*

Jenson: but those days were wild! Absolutely mental!

Seb: yeah they were quite crazy! Hahaha *twinks internally*

Lando: WHAT?!? I get the rest of you but Seb?!? Seb is like the calmest most responsible person I know!

Lance: yeah! His rebellious phase was probably him not looking where he throws his trash.

Other grid kids: yeah!

Fernando and Mark: *still having nightmares of the absolute batshit crazy chaos that Seb used to cause in his RBR days*

Lewis and Nico: *getting Flashbacks to Seb flirting with everything that breathed*

All the older guys that were there when Seb was still in his menace to society era: Yeah No.

Toto: When I asked you two to stop with the flirting I didn't mean this!

Lewis: *side eying Nico* Well it's not my fault someone decided it was fun to just be a bitch

Nico: *scoffs and glare at Lewis* No because it just never is, is it? God forbid Lewis Hamilton ever becomes at fault!

*a full on brocedes argument ensues*

Niki in his chair watching this whole thing unfold: hehehehe

Toto: Niki can you PLEASE take this seriously and help me stop them!

Niki: I can't! It's too much fun! I had to suffer this shit with Alain and Ayrton and now you have to suffer it too. *manic laughter*

Jenson: Hey Lewis remember when Nico sent you that nude-

Lewis: *panicing inside* Nude?! WHAT NUDE?!?! NICO NEVER SENT ME NUDES!!! I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND! EW!

Jenson: *confused and a little jealous* -SUIT AND PANTS SET! WHAT THE FUCK? WHY IS THAT WHERE YOUR MIND WENT TO?! WHY WOULD HE EVEN SEND YOU NUDES?

the people’s princess

Can't stop thinking about how 'Reflections' by

' The neighborhood' is so brocedes coded..

"We were too close to the stars,

I never knew somebody like you, somebody

Falling just as hard

I'd rather lose somebody, then use somebody"

Was worried that the interview with Nico might be just a bit awkward,given the race as well😬,but there you go, Lewis giggling plenty and Nico sounding Happy 🥺🥺

Thank you, Hungary 😭🙏🏻

this just made my day i think

Lewis can’t even say Nico’s name, meanwhile Nico is apparently EDITING THIS VIDEO HIMSELF?!

Brocedes in Love is Blind

(Don’t ask how it would work bc idk, just roll w/ it)

Okay I don’t know why just thought of this but imagine:

So imagine they still go through their drama and everything; Lewis wants to move on and fall in love, while Nico is looking for the same thing.

Unknowingly, they signed up to the same season (whoops)

So they get into the whole pods, and they start talking to people

(Just to let you know, they are actually using fake names and Netflix is protecting their identities (as much as they can))

And for both there are good choices, but there’s one person they can’t stop talking to (it’s each other surprise surprise)

So when they reveal to each other, they just stand in shock

They had fallen for each other once again.

So now they have to deal with their drama being publicized even MORE bc they chose each other (soulmates fr) despite not knowing the other was on the other side of the wall. So plus the drama, they now have to be engaged and probably live in close quarters AGAIN.

They eventually re connect and clear any miscommunication that had happened over their F1 years, including an apology from both sides (eventually 😬)

In the end, they get married adopt more dogs and maybe adopt a kid or two :)

And they lived Happily Ever After (like they deserved)

Starting a GoFundMe to permanently keep Nico Rosberg on the Sky Sports F1 broadcast.

ahh another day another way of finding new similarities between different media and brocedes

this is canon

i will always be a "they're both not normal™ about each other" brocedes truther, but ngl i really do think that nico being able to go into the paddock and both praise and criticise lewis fairly, and talk about him openly and admit that sometimes he was jealous, and he did play mind games and he doesn't regret that but he also didn't want to be that person anymore is infinitely healthier and better adjusted than lewis's "all my teammates have been better than max's [conspicuously fails to mention the only teammate to ever beat him to a championship]" and bringing up unprompted "a better teammate" at the finale of the first championship that he's properly had to fight for since nico left five years ago. like, the opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. and i don't think lewis is indifferent

the sprint commentary from nico is precisely why i refuse to learn more about brocedes because the crumbs i do know are already enough to devastate me. because yes, nico might have spent that entire sprint trying to send telepathic signals to lewis on how he could improve so he could win. yes, every other word out of his mouth might have been about how he knows lewis can be more agressive than that, how he knows lewis and knows he can do better. but that's all commentary, that's still technically part of his job description.

but what do you mean lewis still sends christmas presents to nico's daughters every year?? what do you mean lewis, when talking about the first time he visited monaco said that it wasn't for a a gp, it was because 'a f- ...someone i know- ...a friend of mine invited me'??? the friend in question? a 13 year old nico. what do you mean that now, 25 years later, they live in the same apartment building in monaco???? what do you mean nico said 'he's still my best friend at heart'????? what do you mean lewis, when asked if he was a better driver now then he was in 2016, completely unprompted said 'yes, and better teammate' and then the camera cut to nico wHO WAS ON THE BROADCAST THAT WEEKEND AND HE JUST LOOKED DEVASTATED??????

the childhood best friends -> teammates -> enemies -> strangers -> whatever the fuck it is they've got going on now is just too strong and it would pull me in too deep and i would never escape.

every sky commentator: well we have this inside information but we shouldn't really talk about it so we'll be very vague and unhelpful

nico rosberg: i got an email offering a stake in alpine today. how much? i can't say. just kidding it was a billion euros. what else do you want to know?

imagine you drive for mercedes in formula 1. you did all the right moves to get here, played by all the rules and payed your dues. you started at williams and earned your place on the mercedes team. sure it's annoying having to play second fiddle to your 7 time WDC teammate, but you know that upon his retirement you can pull some strings and bring your childhood best friend onto the team. nothing can go wrong, you're sure of it, you've known each other for too long, been on holidays together and shared hotel rooms. you'll be best friends, driving for mercedes in formula 1.

who am i talking about? well there are two options that fit the narrative. nico rosberg or george russell.