valdvin - ValdVin
valdvin
ValdVin

Cis het male. He/him. Widowed. Northeast US suburbia. Freckled. (Cover: Tamara de Limpicka and David M. Willis. icon: Jeph Jacques.)

247 posts

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valdvin
7 months ago

THEY CAME TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST, STRANGE JOB:

THEY CAME TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST, STRANGE JOB:
THEY CAME TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST, STRANGE JOB:
THEY CAME TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST, STRANGE JOB:

...in a ROUSING SPECACTULAR about

DRINKING UNDERAGEDLY...

...to become

MOM FRIEND, JUGS, and SPEED.

THEY CAME TOGETHER FOR ONE LAST, STRANGE JOB:

Coming soon to a theater near you in an all-ages, all-genders show.


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valdvin
7 months ago

It's me sized!

It's Me Sized!

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valdvin
7 months ago

If you're interested in those maps which show where Americans call it "pop", "soda", or "coke", this poll may be for you!

valdvin
7 months ago

Well, the anonymous voice on the untraceable phone call says "5 million dollars in unmarked bills".

valdvin - ValdVin

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valdvin
8 months ago

Becky's rule: LEAVE ROOM FOR JESUS

And His twelve friends.

Becky's Rule: LEAVE ROOM FOR JESUS

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valdvin
9 months ago

Self-serving food?

Self-serving food!

Self-serving Food?
Those Self-serving Tunas Can Be Real Jerks.

Those self-serving tunas can be real jerks.

Woman's Home Companion - October 1949


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valdvin
11 months ago
valdvin
1 year ago

When you hear the words "Fast Food", you automatically think of one thing.

CASSEROLE

valdvin - ValdVin

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valdvin
1 year ago

AS JOYCE LOSES HER INNER MONOLOGUE

AS JOYCE LOSES HER INNER MONOLOGUE
Oh No, It's 30 Years Of Sal And Her Retroactively Leather Pants!

Oh no, it's 30 years of Sal and her retroactively leather pants!


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valdvin
1 year ago
valdvin
1 year ago

For the fanbase. You know who you are.

Dont Take Me For Granite Or I Shale Be Angry. You Wont Will You? Of Quartz Not.

Don’t take me for granite or I shale be angry. You won’t will you? Of quartz not.


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valdvin
1 year ago
valdvin
1 year ago
Necco Wafers: Barely The Methadone To Caramel's Heroin.

Necco wafers: Barely the methadone to caramel's heroin.

(As a Yankee I get to say that.)

Caramel: The Black Tar Heroin Of Sugar.

Caramel: The black tar heroin of sugar.

Better Homes and Gardens   December 1973


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valdvin
1 year ago

Well, not as is!

There is some disassembly required.

14 Cubic Feet - Ideal For Average-size Family. I Wouldnt Think You Couldnt Fit Your Cheating Husband

“14 cubic feet - ideal for average-size family.” I wouldn’t think you couldn’t fit  your cheating husband and that skank of a babysitter in there, let alone a whole family.

McCall’s   July 1952


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valdvin
1 year ago
valdvin - ValdVin
@sketchy-panda

@sketchy-panda​


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valdvin
2 years ago

Joyce Red Panel Faces make this family-friendlier, but I'm still tagging it.

Big H/T to @zenevasmuroa for the idea!

Joyce Red Panel Faces Make This Family-friendlier, But I'm Still Tagging It.

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valdvin
2 years ago

Drowned face down in cherry Jell-O? It's practically a trope now.

Drowned Face Down In Cherry Jell-O? It's Practically A Trope Now.
The EMTs Found Him Face Down In A Half A Tub Of Cherry Jell-o. He Was Buried With His Comically Large

The EMTs found him face down in a half a tub of Cherry Jell-o. He was buried with  his comically large spoon.

Woman’s Day   April 1953


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valdvin
2 years ago

My wrestling name used to be Mr. Cellophane.

DuPont couldn't stop me, but Kander & Ebb did.

The Gripper Was The Name I Used To Wrestle Under Until I Got A C&d Order From The Oakville Companys Lawyers.

The Gripper was the name I used to wrestle under until I got a c&d order from the Oakville company’s lawyers.

Butterick Pattern Book   Vacation 1952


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valdvin
2 years ago
valdvin - ValdVin
So This Morning I Ate Some Krave Cookies And Cream Cereal And I Am Currently A Perpetual Motion Machine

so this morning I ate some Krave Cookies and Cream Cereal and i am currently a perpetual motion machine


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valdvin
2 years ago

"Hey, I forgot to take off the lens cap! Imma call this avant-garde."

Listen **BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T ** Cool Huh? Oh, Maybe I Shoudda Taken So

“Listen **BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T BZZ-Z-Z-T ** Cool huh? Oh, maybe I shoudda taken so photos. Well this this roll of film is wasted.”

National Geographic Magazine   November 1960

valdvin
2 years ago

Do I want to read what? Um...

Do I Want To Read What? Um...
John Oliver Just Found A 'F**king Creepy' But Legal Way To Blackmail Lawmakers
The "Last Week Tonight" host suggested he has some really weird dirt about certain members of Congress.

Dude this is so f*cking briliant.  To basically get Congress to realize how f*cked up data privacy laws are. He did data mining, targeted men over 45 that are within 5 miles of the US capital, and put ads out including “do you want to read Ted Cruise fanfiction”. it looks like 100s clicked it including 3 that seemed to be in the capital building while doing so, which then means he has their device info, ip address etc. which he can then mine even more.