When The Wreckage Has Been Done

When the wreckage has been done

and the battle is lost and won

When life's no more a moral horror

Heart been though some brutal slaughter

When day no more brings light to me

And the night is too scary to go through

If eyes have dried up of water to shed

Outstretched, and turning on the restless bed

And even if my soul feels an inner lack

Will you still always have my back?

-DON'T WORRY, Siddhartha Mishra

"Why so many poem?"

"Each one tells a story."

"Why not tell the stories instead?"

"You won't understand."

"I don't understand the poems either!!"

*chuckles*"That's not for you to understand!"

I've felt an indescribable agony surround me whenever I have cared too much. And realised it ain't coming back in the remotest of it's form. It has managed to unnerve me everytime. And everytime I have reprimanded myself for caring too much. I have, each time, made resolutions that I'd become that stiff, upright wall that doesn't bend to form a shed for others. But these resolutions, like any other have broken each time, leaving me baffled at my own nature.

Caring, I realised, is a disease with no cure. Once you start caring, there's no coming back. If you care, you care with all of yourself.

And this failing to stop myself from caring is my second biggest tragedy. First is still caring despite everything.

-CARING

Vanshika Singh, 25 March, 2022

But why would it be so

that the care I inflict

on the people I know

would never be back

in the form it goes.

And why would it be so

that I find my heart gaping for the bit

of words that could show

that at the end

it is all worth it.

"I don't know what to do with all the adoration I store inside for people around me!"

"Tell them! They'd feel good."

I shook my head, "That's not like me."

"Then what is like you?"

"Writing ambiguous symbolic poetries about them, that they barely understand. And feel smug about their obliviousness."

I think I have a side

I strive hard to hide

like I have often

seen the moon do.

Not because we are ugly

toxic or unlikeable

But because it is personal

out worldly type.

I'd rather not reveal it

and instead conceal

Not everyone has to be aware

Of how I often feel.

The world doesn't deserve that side,

to see and to explore

It's only for my inquisitive self

to love and to adore.

THE SIDE I HIDE- Vanshika Singh