2023 Year In Review - Tumblr Posts

why, thank you for asking! i've been thinking it through for the last few days, i just wanted to make sure my answer was all written and ready to go first. all... checks notes... 4,000 words of it.

ICYMI, last week i sent asks to a bunch of my friends with a simple question: "what's your favorite game you played this year?" as i hoped, y'all gave a bunch of EXCELLENT answers, all of which i reblogged on my side blog @autumatically! (if you didn't get an ask like this and you want to join in, ping me – i sent too many asks to keep track of and i probably just forgot to send one your way!)

of course i wanted to answer this myself, but i wanted to write about more than just one game! and when i sat down to write, i just kept going, and going, and going...

so we're splitting this up! every day this week, i'll be counting down my top 5 games that i played in 2023. not all of these are games that i've streamed, and only one of them has shown up on anyone else's lists so far, so i'm really excited to reminisce and share my experiences this year 💖

maybe you'll even find a new game to try out? i'm certainly really excited to dig through y'alls lists and try some of the ones i missed out on this year!

to kick things off, let's start with:

Honorable Mentions

two games came out this year that i would probably put in my top 5, no competition. so why didn't i? because i didn't actually play them!

see, as much as i love to play video games, oftentimes i also like to watch them just as much. this has always been great for games that i never intended to play in the first place, like the Final Fantasies and Fortnites of our day… but lately it's also let me take turns with my partner on who plays which new releases.

in fact, for both of the games i'm about to list, i watched my partner play them in full and i've watched no less than two separate people stream them as well. which means, with all that oversaturation, it's probably gonna be a while before i play them myself…

either way! here's my top two games that i didn't play in 2023.

Pizza Tower

this one likely needs no introduction! Wario Land 4 is one of my favorite games of all time, and the way Pizza Tower extends those basic concepts is a masterclass of game design. the moveset is perfectly geared toward accessible speed tech, the level layouts are top notch, the different forms are unique and funny, the art style is GORGEOUS, the combo system adds incredible replay value and pushes the player to their limits…

honestly the only thing stopping me from playing this right now is that the levels are too fresh in my mind, and i'd like a little time to let those memories fade before i dive back in and experience everything in a wave of nostalgia. seeing so much of the game already was totally worth it, though – i had the distinct pleasure of watching my partner learn how to P Rank most of the levels, and the simple joy of watching her build up her skills is one of my standout memories of 2023. proud of you, love!

god, Pizza Tower is a perfect slice of video game. i can't WAIT to play it myself!

Super Mario RPG

as a young kid, i always wanted a physical copy of this game. i could never justify it, though, because i already owned it on Wii Virtual Console, and it was one of the more expensive SNES games i had my eye on… a whole $40 in 2007 money! fast forward to the modern day, and not only do i no longer have easy access to that old Wii copy, but a physical cart now goes for like $90???

blessedly, along comes the Switch remake. i still can't believe this exists – it's a perfect remake in every way, shape, and form! the sprite-based animations are lovingly recreated, the battle system is rebalanced in fun ways, and the music is PERFECTLY re-arranged. even the dialog, which i expected to be completely retranslated… it's smoothed over, but mostly unchanged! the original game's unabashed weirdness and charm is fully intact, and i did NOT expect that out of modern Nintendo.

this is one that i didn't mind watching others play; Super Mario RPG is all about the vibe, and this remake captures that vibe perfectly. i'm excited to play it myself once it's had time to settle! but, for now, i'm perfectly content just vibing with others~

my 5th favorite game that i played in 2023 is...

Sonic Triple Trouble 16-Bit

in times of Sonic "drought" between major games, i often find myself turning to fangames to keep the flame alive. nobody understands Sonic better than the fans, after all, and Sonic especially has a wealth of incredible talent in its fanbase. Before and After The Sequel were two of my biggest hyperfixations in high school! and following the development of Time Twisted is ultimately how i met my partner – a story i should really immortalize on here one day…

but Sonic isn't going through a drought at all! Frontiers and Superstars both released rather recently… and both are aggressive 7/10s. arguably, Sonic's aggressive 7/10s are some of its most interesting experiences! but Frontiers isn't really my style, and Superstars didn't really do as much for me as i hoped it would.

that brings us to Triple Trouble, which is exactly my style of Sonic game – and one of the most outstanding fangames i've ever played.

the original Triple Trouble on Game Gear is secretly one of my favorite Sonic games… sure it's crusty, but i love how unapologetically weird and charming it is! bringing its unique ideas to life in 16-bit is an incredible idea on paper, but not everyone has the chops to execute on it – making it all the more special that this fangame DELIVERS on its premise.

the level layouts are open and explorable! the second act of each zone mixes in unique new gimmicks, just like mania! the music is perfectly redone! swapping between sonic and tails at will is a fantastic idea! and all the new content, references, and cute little details feel right at home among the familiar beats of the original. this is about as close to a perfect remake as it gets.

one such little detail that i won't spoil is a slightly obscure Sonic 3 reference right at the beginning of the game that made me laugh my ass off before even getting out of the starting gate – and that momentum continued the whole way through. the way it follows up Sonic 3's story beats in general is a great homage to the whole series, cementing Triple Trouble's place in the classic Sonic "storyline" (if such a thing exists).

it doesn't just carry itself on references, either – filing off the crust from the original game's mechanics turn them into a fresh new experience, and the remake even brings new ideas to the table! so many little details that made me squee, so many big new moments that made it feel fresh, without any of it feeling heavy handed or underbaked.

so if you've never played the original Triple Trouble, this remake is the perfect way to get into it! and if you've never (or barely) touched classic Sonic, this is a best-in-class example of how much fun it is. it's well worth your time.

…did i mention it's free? it's a fangame, of course it's free! go play it!!

my 4th favorite game that i played in 2023 is...

The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass

"but sky, didn't you already play this when it came out?" yeah, and that was almost 20 years ago. bite me.

if you didn't see me stream Phantom Hourglass already: before this year, i hadn't played or seen the game AT ALL since it came out. i loved it as a kid, i 100%ed the whole thing! but all the opinions i've read ever since suggested that it's one of the more… polarizing games in the series. maybe kid me was just willing to overlook the bullshit? who knows!

now that i've replayed it, though? god DAMN, it might be one of my favorite Zelda experiences in recent memory! especially as, once again, the newest releases (BotW and TotK) didn't really do much for me.

first off: i actually like the touch screen controls – especially for what it does to the items. every single one of these items is at its most unique! drawing a path for the boomerang, connecting things with the grapple hook, and remote controlling the bombchus are some of the coolest item concepts in the entire series. even the swordplay goes beyond just "tap an enemy to kill it," which i was genuinely surprised by!

as a sequel to Wind Waker it hits all the right notes; the condensed sea makes sailing a delight, with tons of things to do that keep sailing from becoming a glorified loading screen. each island is explorable and re-explorable, especially when paired with the map system, which makes taking notes highly engaging and ADHD friendly. it's inspired me to take more notes IRL!

the story is FULL of charm from top to bottom; Toon Link's animations made me laugh out loud on several occasions, Linebeck is the perfect type of loveable curmudgeon, and the rest of the characters are full of soul! i was genuinely sad to let them go at the game's close.

even the Temple of the Ocean King, the most dreaded dungeon in the entire game, the one you are required to return to over and over again throughout the story… really surprised me with how well laid out it is! it's full of shortcuts and treasures that require the new items you get along the way, meaning no two runs ever felt the same to me. that's a HUGE accomplishment for one of the most criticized dungeons in the series.

so all of the internet's complaints can go jump in a… well, scratch that actually. to be honest, all the complaining made me go into Phantom Hourglass like it was a grand mystery that needed solving. will i like it? or will i have grown up too much? in the end it captured the kid in my heart, and that made this revisit all the more special.

my 3rd favorite game that i played in 2023 is...

Freedom Planet 2

i was originally planning to wait on this one until the console version came out in "summer 2023." after it was delayed to the end of the year, i decided to grab the game on pc so i didn't have to wait… and i'm glad i did, because the console versions have been delayed a second time??

(i do not envy their situation and i hope the console versions are better for taking their time. honestly, i'll probably double dip anyway!)

the original Freedom Planet was a formative game experience for me during college. there was something inspiring about the way it shot for the moon – full voice acting, a fun cast of characters, a lived-in world with political intrigue, a focus on adding fast-paced combat – all trying to prove that it's more than just a Sonic fangame in new clothes.

and it worked. it gripped me and never let go! i must've replayed the story half a dozen times, speedran the levels dozens of times each. that's the reason i decided not to wait on the sequel any longer after the first console delay; i grabbed the game on pc and hit the ground running.

one aspect of what makes Freedom Planet special is its level design, and the sequel delivers – every single level is massive, open-ended, and absolutely GORGEOUS. the unique gimmicks, secret collectibles, and speedrun strats are what encouraged me to endlessly replay the first game, and each of those categories has been expanded here into some of the beefiest and most explorable levels i've ever seen in a 2D platformer, hands down. i'm so glad the sequel took its time in the oven, the levels alone were worth the wait!

to me, though, what really makes Freedom Planet stand out from other Sonic-inspired games is its fast and fluid brawling. enemies in each stage take a few hits to defeat, and every stage ends with a grand, bombastic boss fight – you get a handful of moves to tackle these fights with, and each character has very different fighting playstyles! crucially, though, there is no contact damage, meaning you can run circles around enemies while whacking away at their health bars with momentum-based attacks.

it's an incredibly fun and well-thought-out combat system, and its complexity is right at that sweet spot where it feels deep but not overwhelming. honestly it reminds me a lot of kirby's combat, which is one of my favorite combat systems in any video game! (that RtDL remake very nearly made my Top 5 this year…)

Freedom Planet 2 augments the combat system of the original in two ways. one is the addition of a spot-dodge, which feels so perfectly at home that i'm shocked it wasn't in the first game to begin with?? every game with combat benefits from the addition of a dodge, of course, but in this game especially it allows you to keep your momentum while attacking in a way that just feels so natural. there's nothing else quite like learning a boss's attack pattern enough to spot-dodge directly into a powerful counterattack!

but there's also nothing quite so discouraging as getting the boss's health down to a sliver… and biting the dust. here, too, is a place where the sequel shines: if you lose a life, you can choose to restart from a checkpoint with all your health recovered, or you can get back up on the spot with just 1 HP. the push and pull on this system is incredible – you risk getting a game over and having to redo the whole stage… but you could clutch out a victory at the last second! it has the capacity to turn near misses into huge successes, and it saved my ass countless times over the course of the adventure.

tying this all together is a great story that isn't quite as Big and Grand as the first game, but instead serves to deepen the connection between this loveable cast of characters by exploring their history and personalities in more detail. i'm still floored by the fact that these games have full voice acting – it truly makes the characters feel more alive, their personalities shine! the style of VA isn't everyone's cup of tea, i'm well aware… but as someone with fond memories of saturday morning cartoons, i find that it's very genuine and full of heart in a way that most films and AAA games don't really hit me. it's obvious that everyone involved had a ton of fun!

my one regret is that i haven't returned to the game since my first playthrough – i'd really like to replay those levels and see how fast i can clear them! and try out the other characters, and see what the arcade mode is like, and go for the achievements, and…

my 2nd favorite game that i played in 2023 is...

In Stars and Time

i'm not much one for rpgs. i love their deep and complex stories! but i often find when playing them that the fights are either overwhelmingly complex, or too much of a grindy slog. it takes a very special kind of rpg to catch my attention, and In Stars and Time was one of them.

the core concept of the game is that you're stuck in a time loop at the final dungeon of a greater adventure. my first thought was that, surely, having to replay the same few sections of the dungeon, fight the same few enemies, would exacerbate my usual rpg exhaustion. paradoxically, this did not turn out to be the case; the time loop has checkpoints that allow you to rewind further back and then skip forward to where you were, using your number of defeated enemies as a resource. this alone was a godsend and allowed me to skip around as much as i needed to without any of the adventure getting stale.

the rpg system itself is dead simple. there's no mana or MP to keep track of; special attacks simply need to recharge over X amount of turns. the three elements are rock, paper, and scissors – that's not even an allegory, they are literally rock / paper / scissors. each character specializes in using certain types effectively, and if you can use the same type of attack 5 times in a row as a party, it activates a party super that both heals and deals tons of damage. it's an incredibly fun and deep system for how simple it is to keep track of, especially as your party members grow and learn new moves!

all of these smartly designed systems helped to ease my usual rpg hangups and get into the story… and Oh My God. The Story.

i will not spoil a goddamn thing. but i will tell you what i most loved: the characters, and the setting.

once in a while i'll see a writing-advice post going around tumblr that says to think of the little details when you're writing a larger story. what religions does your world have? what other countries are there, and how do they get along? how are the people in your world reacting to the major story beats? how does your main cast get along? how do they get on each others' nerves? what's the cringiest trait each one of them has? do they keep secrets? what are their memories of growing up? it's clear that the author took this direction to heart, creating a rich setting full of life and history!

and this is exactly where the timeloop concept SHINES. each loop you get to try something different, explore other options, to see how your party and the world around you react differently. if you check that bookcase you missed before, it has a whole conversation about life in one of the other countries. if you try the mean dialog option (perish the thought), you learn about a character's trauma in more detail. sometimes even the same actions have something new when you do them a second time… a third time… a fourth time. each loop enriches the characters and their history, deepens their humanity.

and then you begin to wonder. what else are you curious about… and how do you find the answers? how can you help your party members with their problems? what do the people outside of your party think of you? why DOES the main character hate croissants? it's a depth first dive into this wonderful world and its inhabitants; each new thread you dig up is rewarding in its own way.

long story short, i took a risk on this game, and i'm SO happy i did. if you play games for the story, In Stars and Time is your sleeper hit for 2023. jump on this!

and my VERY favorite game that i played in 2023 is...!

Mario Kart 8 Deluxe - Booster Course Pass

i'm still in shock that they made more courses for this game. i genuinely never thought this day would come! when the game first released on switch, i figured the Deluxe moniker meant it was a one-and-done "GOTY Edition" complete package that would never get major updates, and each year that passed cemented my suspicions further. but then, out of the blue, they announced new courses! for my favorite mario kart game ever!!

"sky why is this on the list—"

god i'm really happy with the course selection they brought in from previous games. lots of love for the wii, and it hits all the right notes of my nostalgia. plus i love the way they brought in courses from Tour with all the routes mixed in as one long course! i never played Tour so it's an excellent way for me to sample the course design, and some of them are surprisingly great.

"come on sky, seriously—"

and the characters?? i know they didn't originally plan to add new characters but it just feels so complete with them there. plus they added 8 new characters when i thought there was only room for 6 and—

"SKY this game's been out for almost TEN YEARS and you've been playing it nonstop ever since it came out. how does this count???"

…listen.

when i look back at any given year, the games i play are some of the fondest memories i have. so when i sent an ask to all my friends, asking them what their favorite game they played this year is… that's my way of asking them to reflect on the good times! because that's how it works for me too. it helps me look past the bad shit that happened and toward the memories i made, the fun i had.

and you know what the most fun i had all year was? it was playing Mario Kart with my friends.

each time a new wave came out, i would first play it with my partner. just me and her playing together on local wireless, touring the new courses and gushing about how well updated the old ones are and how cool the new ones are. a chance for me and her to explore a digital space together and share in that delight.

then i would stream it! and as most of y'all know, streaming each wave of DLC made for some of the best streams of the year. not for content, not for competition, but just because we could sit down and play together. a game we could all bond over!

and the dlc was the reason we kept coming back. would this have happened if there weren't new courses? maybe, maybe not! it doesn't matter. the dlc was the perfect excuse, and the quality of both the game and the courses made the return trip feel worth it.

it doesn't have to end there, either! they've effectively doubled the size of this game now. do you know how many times i'm gonna get to jump into other friends' game nights and play with them? it's already happened several times! not only do i have all these new memories, but i have even more to look forward to.

i could endlessly pore over the quality of the courses, but really, none of that matters in the long run. what matters is that they extended one of my favorite multiplayer games of all time. what matters is that i got to share it with my friends! when i think back to this period of my life, these will be some of the first memories i turn to.

so fuck the rules! fuck the idea that a game had to come out in 2023, or even that i had to first experience it in 2023. the Mario Kart DLC was the highlight of my year, and no amount of "it doesn't count" will change that.

you went on a big asking spree asking about everyone's favorite games, but I'm curious... did you have a favorite album, TV show, or movie this year?

an EXCELLENT question! but my answers my be a little disappointing, because...

Favorite Movie of 2023

i don't... really watch movies? they don't capture my interest or investment like games do. this isn't for lack of trying over the years, i've been exposed to many different genres; i just don't click with the format, i guess. i think of them like the average boomer thinks of games – they're cute little distractions and not much else.

there's definitely a few movies that i like and stand out as formative memories, i just don't go out of my way to watch more. even before the pandemic i would only ever go to the theaters like once a year, and for most of the pandemic i can't say i watched anything even digitally.

...but that did change this year! my partner and i watched both Sonic movies and the Mario movie at home, and of the three i can safely say i enjoyed Sonic 2 the most! i like what it was trying to do with its two stories intertwined, and it gave Sonic and friends a lot of time to shine both in action and characterization. plus the finale was super cool~

i do have a handful of films i want to watch one day... but it's kind of a "whenever i feel like it" basis. the ghibli films are high on the list, as are the monty python films and the truman show. maybe i could revisit ferris bueller's day off now that i'm an adult...?

Favorite TV Show of 2023

...i also don't really watch tv?? am i boring???

i mean, historically, i've gotten more into tv than movies. i like the long continuous plot threads, i like getting to know characters in detail, i like slice of life and comedy and cartoons. i have fond memories of watching sonic x, spongebob, survivor, and mythbusters growing up!

but like, as an adult i've never seen the office, or steven universe, or adventure time... and i'm in no rush to, they're just not really priority for me. i can't even think of other shows i might want to watch. idk!

i tried to watch some anime at one point but that didn't really do me either? i guess i had some fun watching squid girl a few years back... i think i just get understimulated by just watching things, vs playing them.

confusingly, you know what i do get into? livestreams and let's plays. so my weird, cop-out answer of "favorite series" is that i've been really enjoying Chuggaaconroy's let's play of pokemon bw2. his let's plays have gotten me caught up with a series that i wasn't "allowed" to play as a kid... i guess that's part of why watching someone play a game isn't as understimulating to me?

Favorite Album of 2023

you can probably guess where this is going – i don't really listen to music that plays on the radio or gets recommended by spotify. i have good reason for this one though: music with lyrics is overstimulating to me in specific circumstances, like when i'm working (always) or driving (the only time i'd use the radio).

but wait, movies are understimulating, even though there's talking... and music with lyrics is overstimulating, even though there's nothing to watch... argh! i don't even understand myself!!

either way i usually put on video game music, because that helps me focus at work, and (usually) doesn't have lyrics in it. i'm aware there's plenty of great instrumental music outside of just games, but games already have so much variety and quality to their osts – i've rarely ever had to seek out more! my music collection is already big enough!

my favorite album to listen to this year has been the music that plays in the cyberspace stages of Sonic Frontiers. the full game's ost is MASSIVE and incredibly diverse in styles, but the hardcore EDM of the cyberspace stages is extremely my style. and the remixes they added in the dlc are some of the best ones! been listening to the full playlist multiple times a week all year to power through some rough work days, and it still hasn't gotten old 💖

2023 Accomplishments In Review

can i toot my own horn for a moment? 2023 was a BANGER year for me in terms of getting creative work done. i don't think i've ever consistently accomplished so much in one year of my life! it's been a long time coming, too, as previous years have been defined by health issues, family problems, anxiety attacks, burnout, a pandemic, working full-time, and just plain Growing Up. so after years and years of fighting… i'm so proud to be standing on a new summit. 💙

but i wouldn't be here without y'all! and it's not just some platitude – i mean you, the person reading this. chances are you're one of my friends, somebody who touched my life, somebody who loved what i made as much as i loved making it. you made so much of what i'm about to list possible!

so let's go over some of what made this year special, together:

2023 was the year of Retrush

i finally finished the nine-year-long journey of completing my Mari0 level pack, Retrush, and i'm SO happy to finally have it off my plate so that i can start 2024 fresh. i spent all of January through April working nonstop on level design so that i could release it on my birthday, resulting in one of my best birthdays ever as y'all played it and streamed it and shared your experiences – thank you so much! 💖

but more than just level design… i also released 6 trailers for an entire pre-release hype cycle, made more complex sprites than i've ever attempted before, and even made a whole website to host it on! then after its release i played through the whole thing, one level at a time, and wrote detailed developer commentary on each level with screenshots and GIFs. so even long after Retrush was finished, it was still on my mind through the end of the year.

2023 was the year of streams and videos

this milestone victory would not have been possible without my partner, playtesters, and friends, so i'd like to give one last shoutout to everyone listed in the Retrush credits. thank you all so much for your help and support 💖

in the first half of this year alone i've released more videos on my youtube channel than ever, as i played through several of my Mari0 mappacks, made two new highlights videos, and even experimented with new styles like throwback thursday and other youtube shorts! then in the back half of the year alone i streamed on twitch more times than i have any other year, beating my previous record in 2017 and completing multiple games that have been on my backlog for years.

but it wasn't just records for me – y'all showed up this year too! y'all subscribed more than ever (peaking at 18 subs!!), showed up to my most viewed stream ever (when i revisited my very first level pack), and even clipped more than ever, including my new most-viewed clip of The Rupoor Incident. thank you very much for enjoying what i do 💖

2023 was the year of the blog

once again, i've posted more on the blog this year than any of the 10 years i've been on tumblr, and i don't just mean all those stream archive posts – this is also the most i've ever written in one year. the Retrush developer commentary spanned a grand total of 38 posts (!!!), in addition to the shorter series and snippets i wrote like my top 5 games that i played in 2023. i'd also like to draw attention to all of the video descriptions and social media copy for every single video and stream archive this year… some of it got a little tedious, so i'm proud of writing all that too!

and let's not forget Now U Know Gaming: not only did i get to finish posting all of the original material early this year, but i also wrote plenty of new material that i started posting at the end of the year! i'm happy that the new material consistently lands just as well as the old – the new "emergency meeting" post is even the top NUKG post of all time! so thank you for enjoying the fun with me – sharing all of the posts and even pulling the webhook channel into your own Discord servers. it means so much 💖

2023 Resolutions In Review

it's new year's resolution season, and for me, that means looking back as much as looking forward. yesterday i wrote about all that i accomplished this year, and today, i want to look at the resolutions i wrote for 2023. i got so much done that, surely, i knocked those out of the park… right?

so as the year draws to a close, i’m not making any resolutions about what i’ll accomplish online, because i know that i’ll be drawn to it no matter what happens. no, my resolution for 2023 is to improve my IRL, so that this year is not as miserable as the past two have been.

uh. Shit

okay, so… i definitely neglected my IRL this year, in favor of creativity. i'll freely admit that some of it was escapism, throwing myself into the act of creation so that i could get away from how i felt about my life. but other parts of it were to get something off my plate, so that i could handle my IRL with more grace and less stress. so it wasn't all bad!

but this quote especially hits like a truck:

then, once i’ve bolstered my IRL with stronger foundations, more joy, new inspirations, less stress… online stuff will naturally follow. i will always want to create. resolutions are for putting in the work.

the sad truth is that i did not get the stronger foundations that i wanted; most of my year was spent in survival mode until i could get home and create again. i want to create out of joy, not escapism! to be clear, there's nothing wrong with the latter – but only i have the tools to get out of survival mode, and i did not accomplish that this year.

i did, however, put a dent in the mountain of stress. here's some things i tackled IRL:

my partner and i put a LOT of effort into improving her mental and physical health this year, getting her to new appointments and treatment and professional help that she did not have last year. i consider this our biggest IRL accomplishment of 2023!

with good budgeting, my partner and i were able to upgrade our computers, phones, and consoles. every single device i just listed was 5-10 years old and falling apart at the seams, so these were very necessary upgrades! all of them have contributed to us getting more creative work done this year, like my upgraded computer allowing me to stream more often – as well as getting more rest.

we also got out of the house more, picking random nights to go shopping, go to the park, or just get food. it's nice to be able to do that again, after the pandemic locked us in the house for so long… but we're just natural couch potatoes anyway lol

i have a psychiatrist and a therapist now! i don't get to see them often due to my health insurance, but it's a good start and something i may be able to invest more into in 2024.

speaking of which, i got to try ADHD meds this year. they didn't work out… but i did try, and it was worth the effort of trying. i would like to try again next year, though i am not making it a resolution.

i wouldn't call this an accomplishment… but we lost two cats this year, and while we'll miss them dearly, it does mean a lot less cleaning and chores to take care of our remaining two cats. having four cats was a commitment we did not choose in the first place, and it was a sore spot for many reasons – but we did our best to care for them anyway.

it's a lot for one year! and i did accomplish my goal of being less miserable than last year… it's just not everything i hoped for, resolved for. i've allegorically polished up my house, but the house itself is still built on shaky ground.

i would say something like, "oh well, there's always next year!" and in truth, there are a lot of opportunities on the horizon that could very well bring the stronger foundations i'm looking for. but i am not going to make the same resolution again… because, quite frankly, i don't know what it takes to get out of survival mode! and i can't possibly predict how a year will go, or what the whims of my ADHD will decide to focus on. i'd rather play it by ear, and just… try to be cognizant of how much i'm leaning on escapism.

so here ends this resolution… but 2024 brings new possibilities, and maybe they'll lead me to where i was already headed.