Allthewrongkirbyquotes - Tumblr Posts

Kirby: What if mayonnaise came in cans?

King Dedede: That'd suck because you can't microwave metal.

Escargoon: ...good morning to everyone except these two.


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Meta Knight: Tell me a joke.

King Dedede: Okay. What did the judge say when the skunk entered the courtroom?

Meta Knight: What?

King Dedede: Trick question, the skunk is the judge, all rise for the skunk judge.

Meta Knight: ...disappointing.

King Dedede: HOW IS THAT DISAPPOINTING!?


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Marx: I want to be a reverse tooth fairy where instead I rob people and scatter teeth on their bed.

Taranza: A dentist.

Susie: I don't know what your dentist is doing to you, but I think you need to call the cops.


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Kirby: Just because Magolor seemed nice, doesn't mean he was a good guy. Meta Knight, does that mean I can't trust anyone?

Meta Knight: Well...yeah! Within reason!

Kirby, somberly: The world in which I once saw happy rainbow colors has suddenly been tinged with gray.

Kirby: Oh well! *walking away happily*


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Meta Knight: You pick up that sword.

Kirby: I-I'm twying but I got no fingews!

Meta Knight: You think you'll survive this, Kirby?

Kirby: I don't know! I-I uh I...

Meta Knight: Because your enemies can smell bad children.

Kirby: I'm not a bad child!

Meta Knight: Yeah, you've been a bad kid, haven't ya? HAVEN'T YA!?

Kirby: No NO! Pwease no! I'm just a pwecious little boy!

Meta Knight: Then you pick up that sword KIRBY! Grab it. GRAB IT!

Kirby: *grabbing the sword*

Meta Knight: That's more like it!


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The end of Kirby's Dreamland

Kirby: I think I'll take that food now, King Dedede.

King Dedede: Sure, go ahead. You ruined my life already, you might just take what little is left.

Kirby: Thank you, friend.

King Dedede: I hate you.


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That one episode about Scarfy in K:RBAY in a nutshell

Kirby: Hey, how you-

Scarfy: *growls*

Kirby: Aah! Get your fucking Scarfy bitch!

King Dedede: It don't bite.

Kirby: Yes it does!


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Susie: I wish I had the ability to make boys really nervous.

Queen Sectonia: Holding a really sharp knife to their neck usually does the trick for me.

Taranza: As a boy I can confirm that this makes me really nervous.


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Dark Meta Knight: Well maybe we wouldn't sound so bad if some people didn't try to play with BIG MEATY CLAWS!

Daroach: What did you say, punk?

Dark Meta Knight: BIG. MEATY. CLAWS!

Daroach: Well, these claws ain't for just attracting mates.

Dark Meta Knight: Bring it on old man, BRING IT ON!

Kirby: No people. Let's be smart and bring it off.

Susie: Oh, so now the talking gumball is going to preach to us.


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Chef Kawasaki: Come and eat at Kawasaki's! Every fucking day, you'll come down and we'll stuff your face full of shit!

Chef Kawasaki, whispering: They're onto you Kawasaki. All those innocent people who died from indigestion from eating at Kawasaki's. I killed them of course.


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Meta Knight: Do Catholics fail trigonometry because they’re afraid of sin?

King Dedede: Do Irish people fail trigonometry because they can’t tan?

Bandana Waddle Dee: Does everyone else fail trigonometry just cos?

Kirby: What’s trigonometry?


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Kirby: What's the cruelest thing ever said to you?

Taranza: Sectonia told me that I should carry a plant around to replace the oxygen I waste...


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Adeleine: I used this to help me with my homework. Fourth grade is a toughie!

Magolor: 4th grade is tough? Hah! I needed this laugh. Just wait 'till you get to college, kid.

Meta Knight: Imagine being an adult trying to one-up a nine-year-old.


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Kirby: We have to save Susie!

Meta Knight: Why?

Kirby: ...those arguments aside, we're saving her anyways.


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Comforting Taranza

Susie: Hey, at least you have clouds to look forward to.

Taranza, crying: I-I just wish my kingdom was better...it's all...

Susie: It's alright, it's alright. I believe in you.

Taranza: D-don't patrontize me.

King Dedede: I'm Dedede and I'm from Dreamland so everything's always perfect.

Susie: Oh, fuck off!


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Marx: Might fuck around and become a demonic entity.

Kirby: Okay, have fun with that!


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Meta Knight: Ayy girl are you a Rubix Cube?

Susie: No, why?

Meta Knight: Because fuck you, you stupid piece of shit.


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Sad? Buy a plant. Happy? Buy a plant. Sick of everyone? Buy a huge carnivorous plant and place it by the entrance of your home.

Taranza, probably


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Nago, sitting in a box: If you're all so clever, why don't you make cardboard boxes in your size?

King Dedede: We did. They're called coffins.


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Magolor: Hey bro, can I get a sip of that water?

Marx: It's not water.

Magolor: Vodka, I like your style.

Marx: Its vinegar.

Magolor: What?

Marx: It's vinegar, pussy.


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